They continued to take meals with the House Elves, stopping by the Great Hall for newspapers on their way there in the morning. It seemed as though the staff weren't ready to emerge yet, even after the dinner with everyone, which Rachel felt she could understand. Being around people meant you had to have a certain level of having yourself together and sometimes that was hard.
Severus had told her that her friends were going home on Friday. He had also said that they would be going home to Fallow Farm on Sunday at the latest. There were boxes in his quarters as he had begun to pack. Leaving Hogwarts forever still seemed a little unreal to her. The idea that Severus was leaving Hogwarts seemed even more unreal.
They sat quietly over breakfast on Thursday morning. The newspaper had begun to be filled with obituaries. There were pages of them, and when Rachel counted them, she knew they were only a small fraction of the people who had died. The Ministry's final count of who had died at their battle was two hundred and nine Ministry employees, with a fair portion of the casualties coming from the MLE and the aurors. The newspaper indicated that they would be recruiting heavily over the next months as they tried to rebuild.
There were nearly seventy Death Eaters who had died at the Ministry and another twenty six captured alive. Right now they weren't releasing any of the identities of the captured or dead Death Eaters. There was a press release from the MLE indicating that a number of Death Eaters were still at large and that the danger had not yet passed. Those identities weren't being released yet either until they knew for certain who they already had.
Rachel had asked Severus last night what had been done with the bodies. He had told her that they'd been taken to St. Mungo's where they'd likely been transported to a temporary morgue for identification. From there, families would be notified and would be allowed to pick up the bodies for burial. It was more straightforward than Rachel was expecting. She wasn't sure what she'd been expecting, but her mind had been filled with the memory of walking among the dead and dying. She knew a morgue wouldn't be like that, not exactly, but it still disturbed her.
She forced herself to read each of the obituaries. They seemed important. These people had all died fighting Death Eaters. Many of the obituaries listed who they were survived by. Parents. Spouses. Children. All of those people had lost someone vital to them.
After what felt like a long time, but was probably closer to thirty minutes, Rachel folded back up the newspaper and looked back at her breakfast. Her eggs were cold, but she knew she needed to eat. She used a warming charm on them, which wasn't ideal, but it would at least make them edible. It didn't matter if her toast was cold. It was just bread.
"What are we thinking of doing today?" Hermione asked.
"Getting away from all this," Draco said, gesturing at the newspapers spread out on the table. "I want to stop thinking about it."
Rachel nodded. While she didn't think they could fully banish what happened from their minds, it didn't help for them to sit and obsess about it all day.
"We could play with the Room," Millie suggested.
"Or go flying," Draco said.
"Or the library," Hermione said.
They were quiet for a long moment as everyone considered those possibilities. None of them quite felt right to Rachel and she suspected that everyone else felt that way too.
"We could take a walk on the grounds," Neville suggested. "Away from the front of the castle. Take a picnic lunch with us. Bring books or cards. I think that's what we would be doing if things hadn't happened the way they did."
"It might not be a bad idea for us to get out of the castle," Theo said. "And there are plenty of spaces away from the front of the castle so that we're not looking at where the battle was."
"Maybe, if we can just get past there quickly, it might be alright," Millie said, looking worried.
"That's fine with me if it's fine with everyone. Let's go back to the common room and get our things once we've finished breakfast," Hermione said.
Rachel applied herself to eating, knowing they were waiting for her. Even though her stomach was a little uneasy, she was used to eating that way by now and was fairly capable at ignoring the insistence from her brain that she was going to be ill if she ate.
Thirty minutes later they were out on the grounds, carrying their school bags and two picnic baskets. They walked for nearly an hour mostly in silence, following the edge of the Forbidden Forest, past the clearing where Rachel had seen the dragons in her fourth year, and further back until they could only see the top of the castle over the rise of the land.
"I don't think we've ever been out here before. I didn't realize that Hogwarts had so much land," Hermione said as they picked a place beneath a copse of trees and conjured blankets.
"Not much reason to come this far back. Besides, we're in the Highlands surrounded by a forest and wards. There's plenty of space and the wards keep any wandering muggles away and well out of the Forbidden Forest," Theo said as he settled onto a blanket.
Rachel sat down next to him. "That's probably a good thing. Can you imagine a muggle stumbling onto a centaur or an acromantula?"
"How do they keep the acromantulas in the Forbidden Forest anyway?" Hermione asked. "The centaurs obviously know better than to roam, but I can't imagine having that conversation with an acromantula."
"Pretty simple. Their food and nest are there," Theo said with a shrug.
"Acromantulas don't travel far from their nests as long as they have a consistent food source," Rachel said, drudging the fact out of her mind from when she'd been putting together notes for Care of Magical Creatures. The Monster Book of Monsters had a whole section on acromantulas.
"I suppose that's true," Hermione said. "You'd just think they'd see muggles as a food opportunity. Or the students, for that matter."
"They know better than that. They're intelligent enough to know their nest will be exterminated if they start eating students or venturing out onto the grounds," Theo said.
"Ugh. Can we not talk about enormous spiders eating people?" Millie asked.
"Sure," Rachel said, not overly thrilled about the topic of conversation herself.
There was near quiet again for a long moment as they listened to the breeze rustling the leaves of the trees above them and the chirps of the nearby forest birds.
"What do you think it's going to be like in our masteries? Millie asked.
"Busy, I would imagine. We're going to have the full time attention of a teacher, which will be nice," Hermione said.
"I'm not sure if even a Mastery can compare with how busy we've been these past three years," Theo said, shaking his head.
"I'll be glad to take a break," Draco said, leaning against a tree trunk. "We have at least three weeks before we receive our NEWT scores and I'm not thinking about anything until then."
"All we have to do is send our NEWT scores to the people we applied with, right?" Millie checked.
"That's right. And then they'll write back either declining or offering you an interview to see if you're a good fit for them," Theo said.
"I'm not even sure what I want to do first, assuming I get the scores, of course. I think it might be wise to start with the Healers Training Program while everything from Hogwarts is still fresh, though I'll need to keep up to date on Potions and spell crafting as well," Hermione said.
"If you did the Healers Training Program right away, you'd probably be with Susan," Neville pointed out.
"That would be good. I'd like that," Hermione said. "And then I'm thinking after that I might be able to do a Defense Mastery with a focus on curses and a Spell Crafting Mastery with an emphasis on countercurses at the same time. And probably a Potions Mastery after that. At least, I think that's what I should be doing."
"Have you considered asking Professor Dumbledore to get you in touch with a Curse Specialist to see what they recommend? I know he knows at least one," Rachel asked.
"Do you think Professor Dumbledore has the time to do that for me?" Hermione asked, her brow furrowing.
"I think it wouldn't hurt to ask him and I suspect Professor Dumbledore would like the idea of Britain having its own Curse Specialist. Do you want me to ask if he can speak with you?" Rachel offered.
"If it wouldn't be too much trouble," Hermione hedged.
"No trouble at all. It might take a few weeks for him to have time, but I will ask him," Rachel promised.
"I'm looking forward to my Mastery," Neville said. "It will be nice to focus on what I want to focus on. I didn't mind our classes for the most part, but I really just want to spend the time in Herbology. I'm thinking once I move back into Longbottom Manor, I'm going to build more greenhouses. That might be a while though. I don't want to go back there right now," Neville said.
"Take your time," Theo said. "I suppose eventually I should check on my father's house. Unless he wrote me out of his will."
"Is there a way to know that?" Rachel asked, uncertain about how all of that worked.
"Eventually I'll get official notification of his death and things will sort of go from there. I'm not sure what the exact process is. Probably the easiest way to check would be to see if I'm now the master of his House Elf, but I'll have to wait until I'm beyond Hogwarts' wards to do that. I might just wait anyway."
"Will the House Elf be alright on his own?" Rachel asked, thinking of Kreacher being left alone in Sirius' house for years and years.
"He should be alright for a week or two. I'll go check in a bit," Theo said.
"Do you want company for that?" Millie offered.
Theo shook his head. "I'm not going to go into the house yet. I'm just going to check on Tomsi and figure out the whole will thing. I might need some help resetting the wards on the house so I can get through them."
"I suppose I should check too," Draco said, sounding slightly strangled. "I don't want to go back to the manor. I don't think my parents will have disinherited me, they wouldn't do that no matter how angry they were. But we have six House Elves there."
"You don't have to go inside to check on the House Elves, you don't even have to go to the property, you just have to be somewhere without the wards that are currently on Hogwarts," Theo said.
"They're on Sirius' house too. They didn't want random House Elves showing up," Rachel said.
"We'll find a place to do it. The House Elves can take care of the properties until we're ready to do something with them," Theo said, sounding a little more confident.
"My Gran didn't disinherit me. She would have told me," Neville said. "I suppose I should check on the House Elves there too. I didn't think of it."
"Does everyone have House Elves?" Hermione asked.
"Just people who are well off," Millie said. "Trust me, you wouldn't catch a House Elf in my house."
Rachel remembered Sirius asking her to take Kreacher and realized she was going to have to do something about that now. She still wasn't comfortable with the idea of owning a House Elf, but maybe it would be the best way to help Kreacher. If she couldn't help all the House Elves, at least she could help Kreacher.
"Well, if we're living together, we should have at least one of the House Elves come so that we have someone to cook meals and clean," Draco said.
"Can't we cook and clean for ourselves?" Hermione asked, turning to look at Draco.
"You think I know how to cook?" Draco asked, laughing.
Rachel felt the corners of her mouth raise. "It's not different from brewing potions. If you can brew potions, you can cook."
"Besides, why would we if we can have a House Elf doing it for us?" Draco asked.
"Because we're adults now and we know how to take care of ourselves," Hermione insisted.
"I think this is a fight for another time," Theo said. "We'll sort it out when we figure out how exactly we're living together. Hermione, are your parents going to be okay with you living with a mixed group?"
"A mixed group?" Hermione asked.
"With boys," he clarified.
Hermione laughed. "Yes. While some muggle parents might be a little wary of their unmarried daughters living with boys, it's not really that much of a concern for them. Besides, they know you're all my friends. Is that a problem in the magical world?"
"Depends on where you're from," Millie said. "My parents won't think twice about it, mostly because they know you're just friends to me, but for most purebloods, a young woman and man wouldn't live together unless they were planning to get married, and really the proper thing to do would be for them to marry first."
"My Gran would not have approved of me living with a girl I wasn't married to," Neville said.
"My parents neither, but they don't get a say anymore," Draco said.
"Same," Theo said. "Rachel, is this going to be a problem for Professor Snape?"
"I doubt it. He knows that we're all just friends. I think he's going to be much more concerned about safety and the wards. We might have to be under the Fidelius charm for him to be comfortable with this," she said.
"That might not be a bad idea. Three of us are still wanted by Death Eaters, and I think they'd be happy to kill the rest of us if they could," Draco said.
"Who would we have as the secret keeper?" Millie asked.
"Severus would probably be willing to do it, if that was okay with all of you?"
"Out of all of the adults I know, he's the one I trust the most," Theo said.
"And we know for sure he'd never reveal the secret to anyone," Draco agreed.
"I'd be fine with that," Neville said.
"That works for me too," Hermione said.
Millie nodded. "I think that would be for the best, and that way he knows that you're safe. That will probably help him be more willing to let you move out. Do we want to play Exploding Snap or something?"
"Sure. You've got the cards?" Neville asked.
"I do," she said, digging in her bag.
They rearranged themselves so they could all see the card pile and Rachel reminded herself to savor this moment and remember that this was a moment she shouldn't have been allowed to have if things had gone the way she'd believed they would.
Severus braced himself as he stood before his office fireplace. While he could have sent this information in a letter, he felt obliged to do it in person. Pansy had trusted him, she had come to him when she could have simply spied on Rachel without any of them being the wiser. He owed her this much, however regretful he was to be the bearer of the news.
He threw in a handful of floo powder. "Greengrass Estate. Hello, this is Professor Severus Snape." At least he would be dropping the 'professor' from his name soon enough.
"Professor Snape? What may I do for you?" Linesa Greengrass called back after a long moment.
"If I may trouble you, I would like to come through to speak with Miss Parkinson, if she is still in residence."
"Pansy is still here, please come through, Professor Snape," Linesa called back.
Severus ducked his head and stepped into the fireplace, emerging a few moments later in the Greengrass' sitting room. It was a richly appointed room, with bookshelves lining one wall, a plush sofa surrounded by upholstered chairs, and a large marble mantel. Windows looked out onto the gardens. "Thank you," he told her, inclining his head slightly.
Linesa shook her head, her eyes fearful. "Bad tidings, I presume."
"I'm afraid so."
"Our wards are strong and I'm not letting the girls out at all for the time being. Is there more I should do?" Linesa asked.
"No, that should be sufficient. I suspect Miss Parkinson will share her news with you, but I feel I must tell her first." He did not wish to be pressed.
"Of course. I don't mean to pry. Have you heard of more attacks?"
"Not yet. The remaining Death Eaters are likely regrouping. As of this time we're anticipating violence around the elections. The MLE is doing what they can to prepare and the Order still watches and will respond if needed," he assured her as he gave her what little news he had. The chances of a Death Eater attack on the Greengrasses were slim, but it still made sense to take precautions.
"How is Rachel? My girls were both concerned for her."
"Still a little in shock, I believe, but she is recovering," he said, going for his standard answer when it came to these events.
Linesa bowed her head. "We all owe her a debt we can never repay. She, and you, have the favor of my family any time you need to call on it. Is there something she needs that we can supply?"
"Not at this time, but we will keep your offer in mind." He knew this was only going to be the beginning of people offering favors like this to Rachel. He needed to prepare her to deal with that. "I'm afraid I must ask if Miss Parkinson is available. My news is somewhat urgent."
"And you have many things besides to do, I understand. Let me take you to a private room and I will have Pansy join you there. Would you like tea?" she asked, leading the way out of the sitting room.
"No, thank you," he said. He did not wish for this to be a drawn out conversation. He would give Pansy what support he could, but he did not know what he could do that would make the situation better for her.
Linesa brought him to a small room that seemed to be intended for private study. There was a desk, a bookcase, and two armchairs gathered around a lamp. The window looked out on a different garden. "I'll send Pansy here directly. Please make yourself comfortable," Linesa said before leaving him.
Severus sat in one of the armchairs and tried to prepare himself. He had never delivered news like this to one of his students before. The only familial death notifications he'd given were to students who were prepared to hear the news. He had not had to tell Malcolm that his father had been sent to Azkaban. Unfortunately they had both learned about that in the newspaper.
Maybe five minutes passed before the door opened slightly and Pansy peered in. She was in layered robes of soft pink and had all the look of a young pureblood lady ready to see a suitor except for the fear in her expression. "Professor Snape. It's about my mother, isn't it?"
"Yes, please come and sit down," he said.
Pansy entered the room and closed the door but stayed there as if ready to flee. "Sir? Please. I need to know."
"I received word this morning that your mother is currently in custody of the MLE at the Ministry. A trial date has not been set, but I expect that will not happen until later this year, well after the elections at least. She will be kept in a cell at the Ministry until her trial. At this time they are not allowing familial visitors, but that may change as the situation in the Ministry changes," he said, giving her all of the news at once.
Tears began to run down Pansy's face. "My mother wouldn't do anything. She didn't do anything."
"She would not have had a choice. The Death Eaters were called to battle." He knew Ambrosia was Marked, so he did not bother asking. He also knew that Ambrosia and Wardell had been in the Dark Lord's inner circle. There was no saving Ambrosia now.
Pansy shook her head. "No. She may have had to go, but she wouldn't have…Did they say where she was? Where she was captured? Was she at Hogwarts?"
"She was not at Hogwarts." Severus had seen the Death Eaters they'd captured himself and none of them had been Ambrosia. "I do not know which battle she was at, but I would say it was likely at the Ministry."
"What can I do?" Pansy asked, her tears running unchecked.
"I'm afraid there is nothing you can do. Your mother will be questioned with Veritaserum and then she will go to trial. What happens there will depend on what your mother has done. I have the contact information for one of the aurors who is overseeing the questioning and trial preparation. He may be able to help you visit your mother while she's being held at the Ministry once that is possible," Severus offered.
"She can still get my messages, can't she? If I send her Patronus messages?" Pansy asked.
"As far as I know there are no wards that a Patronus can't pass through. I suggest you make your messages infrequent until you have a chance to speak with the aurors to make arrangements." Severus withdrew the piece of parchment with two names and addresses on it and set it on the small table between the armchairs. "This is how you can get into contact with Auror Shacklebolt. I already let him know you will have questions for him. Following the trial you will need to contact a solicitor so that you can take over the day-to-day affairs for the Parkinson family and manage your home. I have written the name of a solicitor that I know who has worked with students in the past for you to get into contact with. Mrs. Greengrass may also be aware of solicitors that she can recommend to you."
"I tried. I tried to get her out. She wouldn't listen to me. She was too afraid." Pansy finally came over to the other chair, sitting down and then burying her face in her hands as she sobbed.
"I know. You did everything within your power. It is not your fault. I know that your parents loved you and they were wise to allow you a way to flee from the Death Eaters. They wanted the best for you," he said, imagining what he might say to Rachel under similar circumstances.
"My father is dead. I didn't even get to say goodbye." The words were slightly muffled by her hands, but they were clear enough to be made out.
"I am sorry. Do you need assistance with putting together a memorial?" he offered.
"Mrs. Greengrass said she would help, but I don't know where my father's body is. All I know is that he's dead, because my Patronus won't go to him. I don't know where he is."
"They are still in the process of identifying bodies and notifying next of kin. Many were killed and it has not yet been a week. It may take a few weeks before they can return his body, but all of them will be retreated with respect and will be kept under stasis charms to preserve them." Rachel had asked about what happened to the bodies as well. The prospect of the dead being gathered seemed to worry her, though she hadn't elucidated what parts she was worried about.
Pansy slowly calmed. "I don't know what to do. I don't know what I'm supposed to do."
"For which part?" he asked, wanting clarification before he began giving advice.
"Just, at all. I wasn't planning on doing a Mastery. I just wanted a greenhouse of my own. I'm not ready to get married, I'm just not. I love Draco, but I don't want to marry him right now."
Thankful that he hadn't begun with advice for what do with her father's body, Severus nodded. "You do not have to marry anyone until you are ready to marry. Do not let fear of the future pressure you into something you are not ready for. You are an independent young woman. You have your own source of funding to support you and I anticipate that your parents will have directed for their home and the family Gringotts account to be passed to you. You will be able to have a greenhouse if you wish it. For now it seems as though the Greengrasses have opened their home to you. Let them care for you until you are ready to begin."
Pansy swallowed convulsively. "Mrs. Greengrass said I can stay as long as I need to."
"Good. Give yourself some time. You have endured a great loss."
She exhaled heavily. "I can't imagine my mother using an Unforgivable Curse. I can't imagine her killing someone. Maybe they'll let her go."
Severus very much doubted that Ambrosia would receive anything less than a life sentence to Azkaban. "That is not within your control. We'll know what the exact charges are before the trial. Contact the people that I have listed. They will help guide you through it. And if you need additional help, you may seek me as well, by letter or by Patronus."
"Thank you. Thank you for telling me and not making me wait for someone to notify me. Even if she's in custody, at least I know where she is," Pansy said, drying her face with a lace-edged handkerchief.
Severus nodded to her, unable to find something to say that wasn't false. He wasn't glad to be delivering this news. "Do you have what you need for right now?"
"Yes. Thank you. Do you need me to walk you back to the floo?" he asked.
"That may be wise, I don't wish to wander in Mrs. Greengrass' home," he said, though he did know the way.
Pansy stood and led him back to the sitting room, where Linesa was waiting.
"Dear," she said, opening her arms, and Pansy rushed into them.
"I'll take my leave. Thank you for letting me come," he said, withdrawing his pouch of floo powder.
"Thank you," Linesa said as she held Pansy.
"Hogwarts. Severus Snape's office." A few moments later he was back in Hogwarts. He set himself behind his desk with a heavy sigh and began cataloging what he needed to do before he could take Rachel and leave.
His classroom and storeroom were clean and in order. His grades were finished. He was still in the process of packing, but there wasn't that much more to do. This evening he would floo the remaining students to their homes and guardians, however temporary those would be. And then tomorrow he would speak to Albus.
Time had not yet cooled his temper, but he was not willing to stay longer. He thought he had enough control for a brief conversation. He would go in prepared.
On late Friday afternoon they all gathered in Severus' office. They'd all packed, given parting hugs, and promises that they would see each other next week at the latest. Millie and Hermione had their carriers for Midnight and Crookshanks, Neville had Trevor's carrier. They'd all shrunken their trunks and Draco was carrying his broom. Rachel had set her things aside in Severus' office to bring them to her room later.
"Check with Sirius, see when he's okay with us coming by," Millie said, not for the first time.
"We will, he's never minded us meeting there before," Theo said, also not for the first time.
"We'll see each other soon," Hermione promised.
Millie turned to Severus. "Thank you for letting us stay."
Severus nodded once. "I'm grateful that you were here for Rachel."
Rachel felt herself blush. She didn't think her friends had stayed just for her.
Millie approached the fireplace and threw in the floo powder. "Bulstrode Place. Mom? Dad?"
There was a brief silence before her dad replied. "Come on home, Millie."
Millie took a breath, stepped into the green flames, and then disappeared. A moment later the connection ended.
Severus turned to Rachel. "I'd like you to be back before dinner."
"I will," she said. That gave her about an hour and a half at Sirius' house, which should be plenty of time. She wasn't planning on having an in-depth conversation with Sirius and Remus today.
"You recall the passphrase?" he asked them.
"The dawn triumphs over the night, and each morning begins anew," Theo repeated.
Severus looked slightly annoyed, but he nodded. "Check to make certain someone is there to receive you before you step through. They should be expecting you."
Since Hermione was standing closest to the fireplace, she threw the floo powder in. "Twelve Grimmauld Place. Hello? Sirius? Remus?"
"We're here, come on over," Sirius called back.
They flooed through, each giving the person in front of them a few seconds to step out of the way before they followed. Rachel came last and stepped out into Sirius' kitchen.
"There we all are," Sirius said as he looked over them. "No Pansy? No Millie?"
"Pansy is with the Greengrasses right now. Millie is trying things at home for a little bit and seeing how it goes," Hermione answered for them. "Are my parents here?"
"Upstairs in their flat. I know they're waiting for you, they just weren't sure what time you were arriving," Remus said.
Hermione turned to them. "I'll see you all later."
"We'll be here," Theo said.
Hermione left the kitchen, Crookshanks making his displeasure known from his carrier as she left.
Sirius came over to Rachel. "Can I hug you?"
"Yes," she said, reaching for Sirius and hugging him before he could hug her.
"Are you alright?" he asked when he finally released her.
"Working on it." She was still pretty mixed up and hadn't quite figured out what to do about it yet.
He used his hand to cup her chin and cheek as he looked at her. "Take your time. You have plenty of it."
She nodded and decided she needed to speak with Sirius and Remus soon. Maybe next week. They deserved to know the truth about what had happened and she could tell them pretty much everything except naming the horcruxes.
"Alright then, let's get all of you settled. I'll tell you what we've been telling everyone for right now. We're almost a full house here as we're not evacuating muggleborns and their families to the continent any more, but we're not suggesting that people just resume their lives either. There are still Death Eaters out there. We're not sure how many at the moment, we're still trying to figure out who is accounted for. We anticipate that there will be more attacks, especially around the elections, so we want everyone to continue the security procedures that we've been following for the time being. Unfortunately that means you can't run free beyond the wards just yet. You've got the same rooms as last year, so I'll go ahead and take you up and you can get settled. We'll have dinner down here around six. You have free run of the house, just be mindful of the families upstairs, we've got a few young kids at the moment."
"We'll be mindful, and I think we're all aware that it's not safe yet. Do you mind if our friends visit us? It would just be the same people who were here with us last summer," Theo asked.
"That's fine, anytime. We're still under the Fidelius charm, but they all have access. Just let them know the current passphrase before they come, don't send it by owl," Sirius said.
"We won't," Neville promised.
"Let's go get you settled then," Sirius said. "Remus and Kreacher are figuring out a meal for everyone and hopefully we'll just have a quiet day back."
They followed Sirius out of the kitchen and went upstairs. "Draco, you've got Malcolm next to you on this level. I've got a bedroom set aside here for Pansy if she wants it. Theo and Neville, you're on the second level in your old rooms and Millie's just next door if she decides to come. Rachel, there's still a room set aside for you if you want it."
"Thank you," she said, though she wasn't sure she was ever going to stay at Sirius' house. She broke off as everyone went for their bedrooms and went down the hall on the first floor to knock on Kreacher's door. She knelt down, wanting to be on the same eye level as him.
The door opened and Kreacher peered out. "Kreacher heard Miss."
"Hi Kreacher. How are you?"
"Kreacher is Kreacher. Kreacher heard. Kreacher heard." He wobbled about, either distressed or excited.
"You heard what?" she asked.
"Miss killed the Dark Lord." Kreacher's whole body shivered as he stared at her.
"Well, it's a little more complicated than that, but essentially yes. The Dark Lord is dead. He can't come back this time," she promised.
"Miss killed the man who killed my Master. Thank you, Miss. Thank you." Kreacher was wobbling again.
Rachel reached for him to steady him and found herself with an armful of House Elf. She held him while he trembled. "He's gone. He's gone now. He can't hurt anyone else. You helped us, Kreacher. You helped us by telling us about the locket. Master Regulus helped by getting the locket for us."
Kreacher finally stopped shaking and took a step back to see her. "Miss died. The traitor and the wolf said Miss died."
"Uh, yeah. But I came back. It's alright." She still wasn't sure what to tell people about that.
"Miss came back the way the Dark Lord came back?" Kreacher asked, looking slightly wary.
"Not at all like that. I had blood protection from my mom's sacrifice," she told him. She definitely didn't want people to think she came back like the Dark Lord did.
"A willing blood sacrifice can be the most powerful protection of them all. Miss is blessed."
Rachel thought that was true. Her mom had protected her from far beyond the grave. "Is there anything you need or want?"
"No, Miss. Miss is finished at Hogwarts?"
"Yes, finally. I'll be able to drop by to visit more often now, but you can still write to me if you want to. Sirius knows how to reach me if you need me in an emergency."
"Kreacher will watch and listen for Miss. Kreacher is needed in the kitchen."
"Alright. Let me know if you need something or want something. I'll help," she told him as she stood back up.
"Yes, Miss. Kreacher will help Miss with whatever she needs," Kreacher said, backing away and shutting the door.
Rachel went down the hall to Malcolm's room and knocked.
His door opened a moment later and he peered out. "Rachel?"
"Yeah. Do you have a moment to talk?" she asked.
Malcolm nodded and opened the door further to let her inside.
She took a seat in the armchair by the window. "I'm sorry I didn't see you before you were sent here on Monday. I should have made the time."
He shook his head. "It's fine. You were busy."
"It's not fine, I should have made the time and I didn't. I'm sorry."
He shook his head again. "I'm fifteen, I don't need to be checked on."
"Everyone needs to be checked on, no matter how old they are. Sunday was pretty scary for everyone. Has Sirius talked to you about it at all? Or Remus?"
"I heard a little about the battle. And about you. But that's it," he said, glancing at her before looking down. "Madam Pince kept a group of us near her in the evacuation, because she said we were the most urgently needed to get to safety if we needed to send people away."
Rachel nodded. "Other Wizengamot children and muggleborns, I imagine."
"Yes, I think so."
"I'm glad they were protecting you. I asked Severus, and he said that the MLE says there was no outbreak from Azkaban, so everyone who should be in there is still accounted for. So you don't need to worry about your father being on the loose."
"Why?" Malcolm asked. "I mean, why didn't the Dark Lord get them out for the battle?"
"I don't know. It could be that he was on a specific schedule and didn't have time. Or maybe he didn't want to tip his hand and alert people that an attack was coming. And Azkaban takes a physical toll, so he probably would have needed to get them out earlier for them to help in this attack," Rachel guessed, wishing she had a better answer.
Malcolm sighed. "My father is going to die in Azkaban and I'm the one who put him there."
"Your father being in Azkaban is not your fault. Your father made the choice to do the things that he did. The Order and the MLE knew your father was a Death Eater long before he was caught, they were just waiting for the right moment to charge him. It was nothing you did." Rachel thought about the people who had been sent to Azkaban because of things she'd been involved with. Leander. Umbridge. Hestia Carrow. She'd never intended for any of them to end up Azkaban. But there had been no way to stop them from doing what they were doing. She hadn't made their decisions, she'd just been there through the fallout.
"I still wish he wasn't there. I don't want to live with him, but I don't want him to die either."
Rachel nodded. "I understand. That's how I felt about my aunt and uncle. I didn't want anything to happen to them, I just wanted to not have to think about them or see them." She felt stirrings of guilt at that again. She wished they weren't dead. That she had killed the person who had killed them hadn't seemed to fix things at all.
They sat with that for a long time. "Did you really kill the Dark Lord? Is he really gone?" Malcolm finally asked.
"I did, but I had help. Professor Dumbledore is the one who was dueling him. I never could have killed him if he wasn't focused on Professor Dumbledore." She wondered now if Professor Dumbledore had been dueling the Dark Lord specifically because he knew she would show up. "The Dark Lord is gone for good. He had been doing a specific dark magic and that's what allowed him to return last time. Professor Dumbledore undid that dark magic so the Dark Lord could be killed. He's not coming back."
"Professor Dumbledore really can do anything, can't he? I was always told that the Dark Lord was more powerful than Professor Dumbledore, but I guess he wasn't."
Rachel shook her head. "It's not about power, it's about what's done with it. The Dark Lord had a lot of opportunities to win this war. He made mistakes. Professor Dumbledore also made some mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, that's okay. Professor Dumbledore worked to uncover how the Dark Lord stayed alive and how to counteract it. If the Dark Lord had covered his tracks, if he hadn't believed he was invulnerable, then this would have ended very differently."
"I'm glad it didn't. Even if it means my father is in Azkaban for the rest of his life, I'm glad it didn't end differently," he said, looking at Rachel again.
"Me too. In a lot of ways, we got lucky. Even with all of the people who died. I guess I wouldn't say that we were lucky. But I've been thinking a lot, and I'm not sure how it could have gone better either. I mean, less people dying, obviously, but I'm not sure how we could have accomplished that under the circumstances."
"What do you think is going to happen next?" he asked.
"I suppose they'll figure out what happened to the rest of the Death Eaters and try to capture them. People think there are going to be attacks around the elections, so everyone is staying on their guard. Otherwise, I think we just keep going and living our lives." She wasn't sure how else to answer that question. "I will be in and out of Sirius' house, but you can always reach me by letter or by asking someone to send a Patronus message to me. You've got a tutor's exemption for the summer?"
"I do," he said.
"Good. Keep working on the Patronus charm. It takes time, but I know you can do it. And I know Theo will check on you as well, he's here for the summer too. And Severus and Sirius and Remus are all available too if you want a real adult." She wasn't sure she quite qualified as a real adult yet, even though she was nearly eighteen.
Malcolm shrugged. "I'm not sure what to do with myself. They didn't give us any summer homework."
"Well, there are two libraries here, so you'll have plenty to read. You can ask to brew potions with Draco, he'll probably let you. You can ask Sirius and Remus about learning artifacting, or just about anything really, and they'll teach you that too. If you want to start reviewing for your OWLs, I know a series of books that will help. And really, just taking a break is a good thing. It's been a rough year."
"You don't think they'd mind if I asked?"
"No, I don't think they'd mind at all. This is your home now and a lot of people here will want to help. I know how weird that is. It took me a long time to get used to people wanting to help me, but it gets better. Try spending some time with Sirius and getting to know him. He's a pretty okay guy."
Malcolm nodded, though he still seemed worried.
"You're alright for now?" she checked.
"Yes. I'm alright."
"Okay. I'll check in with you again later, but you know how to reach me, even if you just want someone to talk to. I've got to get back for dinner. It will be alright. Things will be weird for a while, but they'll get better." She had to believe that.
Malcolm nodded again and Rachel let herself out of his room.
She went back downstairs and into the kitchen where she found Remus and Kreacher at work preparing a meal.
"Are you staying for dinner, Rachel?" Remus asked.
"Not this time, I think Severus wanted just a quiet evening with just us. I'll come by next week though. I want a chance to talk with you and Sirius, we haven't really had the opportunity."
"I'd like that. We've heard a lot of things this past week and I think it would be a good idea for us to talk. When you're ready," Remus said, meeting her eyes.
"We'll talk," she promised. "I'll see you soon."
"We'll look forward to it."
Rachel flooed back to Severus' office and found it empty. She retrieved her truck, her broom, and her school bag and went into Severus' quarters. There were boxes stacked everywhere as Severus prepared to move out. His bookshelves were now empty, as was his private lab. He was in his armchair with the Evening Prophet open in front of him.
"Anything I should know?" she asked.
Severus shook his head. "They're postponing any big changes in the Wizengamot until after the elections. Scrimgeour said he wanted everyone elected properly before any law changes are passed or trials begin. He's up for election as well, but it is pretty much a given that he'll retain the Minister's position. Are you ready for dinner?"
"Yeah, just give me a few minutes to put things down and wash up," she said.
He nodded. "Everything alright at Headquarters?"
"Yes, business as usual. I'm going to drop by next week and see my friends and talk with Sirius and Remus."
"That's fine. I'll get us dinner," he said as he put aside the newspaper.
Rachel went to her room, which would only really be her room for one more night, and set things down before stepping into the bathroom. She washed her hands and face and looked in the mirror. She didn't quite feel disconnected from her reflection - she could certainly recognize herself - but it also didn't feel quite right either. She supposed she needed to get to know herself again. A lot had changed in a very short time.
"Rachel?" Torey asked from her doorway.
Rachel stood and went into Torey's office. She went directly for the sofa and pulled her feet up with her and waited for Torey to settle into her chair.
"A lot has happened since we last spoke," Torey said.
Rachel nodded. "Don't believe everything you read in the Daily Prophet. Especially about me." There had been several more articles about the defeat of the Dark Lord, slowly growing more and more elaborate and ridiculous.
"I know. Do you want to talk about it?"
She rubbed her hand over her mouth. "Well, about that part, I'll just say this. The Dark Lord is dead for good this time. We made sure of it. And I did kill him, but it's much more complicated than that, and people are giving me way too much credit."
"How about your mind? Is the connection gone?" Torey asked.
"That was the first thing I checked. The hole is gone and sealed over. I can't feel anything from him anymore. After all this I feel really confident that he's dead now. And I think if I had any doubt at all, I would be worried about it. Also, Severus' Dark Mark has faded almost entirely. It's basically just a shadowy outline now. He said that when the Dark Lord was disembodied before, it had grown lighter, but not like this. He also said he checked and all the magic is gone from it. And the curse on the Defense position seems to be gone as well, since Gemma is still alive, but I guess we'll know for sure if she takes the position for next year and is still there when school begins."
Torey nodded "Most magic, not all, but most will disappear when the caster is dead. When you say that it's more complicated than that, do you mean because you died?"
"No, though that's part of what happened. I mean Professor Dumbledore was dueling the Dark Lord at the time, and I was hidden my invisibility cloak and snuck up on him and used the Killing Curse. So I really didn't do that much."
"You did more than enough. I think you were incredibly brave. I know you went into this with the belief that you were going to die-"
"And I was right." If she couldn't say that to Severus, she could at least say it to Torey. "We misinterpreted the prophecy. It meant both of us had to die at the hands of each other. Which doesn't make sense, or wouldn't, if we didn't know what we know now."
"Do you want to talk about dying?" Torey asked.
"I don't think I really need to. It was a good thing. I saw my parents. They held me and told me that they loved me. They said they were proud of me and that they'd be there waiting for me when I was ready to come back and that they wanted me to have a long and full life."
Torey smiled. "That sounds wonderful. I'm glad you got to have that experience, even though I am also glad that you returned to us. I know a great many people would have missed you, myself included."
Rachel winced. "I kind of hurt Severus with all of that and I'm not sure what to do about it."
"What do you mean? By what your parents said?"
"No. By dying. Apparently he used his Patronus to try and find me and discovered that I was dead. And then he went through my stuff, looking for clues about where I might have gone, and he found and read a letter I had written to him. He was pretty upset about that."
"I'm sure it hurt him a great deal to believe that you were dead. He cares about you. You're his daughter, and for many parents, their greatest fear is losing their children," Torey said. "I'm not sure that's your fault though."
"He said I wrote him a suicide note."
"Did you intend it to be a suicide note?"
Rachel shook her head. "No, I just wanted to tell him how much I loved him and to say goodbye and to assure him that this had to happen the way it did. I wrote notes to my friends too, to explain things so they weren't left wondering. I just had things I needed to say to people and I couldn't do it in person. I'm not sure what to do with those letters now."
"I'll say this: Severus never would have accepted that it was necessary for you to die. He never would have believed that no matter how you explained it to him, and it always would have hurt him. I think that one of the reasons why Severus is so hurt by this letter is it allows him to see a future where you remain dead. He lived in that reality of your death and that will always be painful to him. I'm not necessarily saying you did something wrong, or that you intended to hurt Severus, I'm just saying that it's understandable why he is hurt. As for what you can do, I would suggest giving him time and spending time with him. Let the reality that you are alive help heal those hurts."
She could do that. "I didn't intend to hurt anyone."
"I know. For your other letters, if they are things you want to say to your friends, maybe take the time now to say them. I'm not sure that I'd suggest giving them the letters, though that's a possibility, but I think you have an opportunity that most people don't have. You have worked out what is important to say to them and you have the chance to say it," Torey suggested.
"Maybe." Saying those things was much harder than writing them down. "I did have to die though. And I explained why to Severus, but…"
"But?" Torey prompted when Rachel didn't continue.
"He's leaving Hogwarts. He's so mad at Professor Dumbledore that he's leaving Hogwarts and he's going to stop being a professor."
"That's a big step. Do you know why he's mad at Professor Dumbledore?"
"You know my connection? It was actually part of the Dark Lord. And in order for the Dark Lord to die, that part had to be killed. To kill something of that dark magic, the host has to die or be destroyed. Professor Dumbledore knew that my connection was this dark magic. And he didn't tell us, because he thought Severus would take me and flee instead of us staying to fight the war." This was sort of a rehearsal for telling Sirius and Remus this. She wanted practice at telling someone before she tried it with them.
Torey looked at her for a long moment. "Are you angry about this?"
"No. Honestly, knowing that would have really freaked me out. The connection and having him in my head and my dreams was bad enough. To know that part of his dark magic was inside of me...I'm not sure how I would have handled that. And I think Professor Dumbledore was right. If Severus had known that, he would have taken me away and left Britain to lose the war rather than let me die. I didn't want him to do that."
"The choice still should have been yours. And perhaps it would have helped you have an understanding of your connection sooner."
Rachel shook her head. "The choice wouldn't have been mine. Severus would have insisted that we leave and I wouldn't have been able to do anything about it. I don't want for the way that this happened to change. A lot of people died. A lot of people. Some of whom I knew. And it would have been better if I could have gotten to the battle sooner, but I don't see how I could have done that. And I don't see how I could have stopped more people from dying. The way this happened may have been bad, but every other way I can come up with is worse."
"We can't change what happened. That much is true. But Professor Dumbledore kept some very personal information from you and your guardian, because he wished to win a war. I am not trying to tell you to feel any particular way about this to you, but I also want you to understand that it's not okay for people to manipulate you in that manner," Torey said.
There was that word again: manipulate. She didn't feel manipulated by Professor Dumbledore. "Even though I'd really rather not have known? Even though just knowing about it now, even though it's gone, still makes my skin crawl and I just want to tear at my body to get it out of me."
"When that feeling happens of wanting to tear at your body, what do you do?"
Rachel sighed. "I don't hurt myself. I'm not going to do that. I just…I hate knowing that was inside of me."
"It was a violation. For the Dark Lord to place part of himself inside of you like that is a violation. Was this something that happened recently? When you were captured? Or in the graveyard?" Torey asked, looking worried.
"No, this happened when I was a baby. The Killing Curse rebounded off him and split his soul, and it latched onto the nearest living thing. Or, at least that's how I understand it, I'm not really fully sure. But it definitely happened while I was still a baby. My occlumency, my mental architecture, and my manifestation was protecting me from that piece of soul. The Dark Lord did this to his snake as well, and he could possess her. I think if my mind had been left vulnerable, he would have been able to possess me as well." Given the way things had been going, if they hadn't ended the war there, it might not have been that long before the Dark Lord could have possessed her. She shuddered.
"I think that answers the question of how your occlumency was developed then. We're fortunate that your mind and your magic were able to protect you. But to answer your question, yes, I still think Professor Dumbledore should have told you and Severus. Even if it wasn't something you wanted to hear, we would have helped you through learning that. You've managed a great deal of difficult things, you would have managed this too."
Rachel wasn't so sure about that. "I'm not angry at him. But Severus is and I don't know how to help with that."
"That's not something you need to help with. Let Severus be angry and manage his own emotions and relationships," Torey said steadily. "What is Severus planning to do next?"
"We're going home today. We've been packing. Severus has been finishing up the things he needs to do for the school. Severus says that he's going to brew and invent potions and build a greenhouse. He might take apprentices later on. I think that will be good for him, actually. I'm not sure how much he really enjoyed being a professor."
"It will be good, if that means Severus is allowed to pursue the career he wants. What will you be doing?"
"Well, apparently I have to join the Wizengamot." Rachel made a face. She was resigned to it, but still had no idea what the hell she was doing.
"Have to is a strong word. You could resign your family's seat, but I would suggest not doing that, at least at first," Torey said.
"Why has no one told me I can do this?" Rachel asked. "And why shouldn't I?"
"Because it's very rarely done, but they cannot force you to be on the Wizengamot if you don't want to. But I would recommend giving it a try and seeing how it goes. You have an incredible opportunity."
"I do?"
"Yes. This is something we should talk about more, but people are going to react very strongly to you. You saved the country from a devastating war that we were losing. People are going to idolize you, and I'm not suggesting that you should take advantage of that, but I will say that I suspect you will have the opportunity to shape politics in this country for the next century. Is there anything that you would change about magical Britain? Anything that you want done?" Torey asked.
"I want them to stop using Azkaban and the Dementors. No one should be tortured, not even prisoners. I want laws for House Elves to change so that it's illegal to hurt them and so that they can leave and be free if they want to. I want…I want to make it so another war like this won't happen again and so that people aren't afraid of muggleborns changing our culture. I think if people understood that muggles are just like us, then there wouldn't be this hatred and fear of them." Rachel was a little surprised at how quickly all of that came to her lips, but it was the truth.
"I think you're going to have an uphill battle on all three of those, but I think they're worthwhile tasks. And I can think of no better place for you to influence things in that direction than the Wizengamot," Torey said with a nod.
Rachel considered that for a moment. "Do you really think those things could happen?"
"Possibly, but they won't unless someone is fighting for them. It sounds to me like you believe strongly about those things."
"I do. I really do." Rachel frowned as she thought about it. Could she really help people through the Wizengamot? Would people really listen to her? "What do you know about the Wizengamot? Like, I feel like I don't know anything."
"I'm not sure I'm the best person to tell you about it, I've only been here in Britain for the past twelve years, but I'll tell you what I know and maybe Severus will know more."
Rachel nodded. If she was doing this, then she needed to know how it all worked.
Severus approached Albus' office in the late morning carrying his grade book, his student files, his letter of resignation, and two short scrolls of notes to be given to whoever took the Potions position and the Head of House position. In his letter of resignation he'd recommended Gemma for the Head of House position and given a short list of masters and mistresses from the Potions Guild who would be suitable for the potions position if they could be convinced to take it.
"I'd like to speak with the Headmaster," Severus told the gargoyle as he came to a stop.
He waited for several minutes and then the gargoyle stepped aside to let him pass. Riding the staircase, he reminded himself that no matter how angry he was, no matter how betrayed he felt, he wanted to stay in control of this conversation. He wasn't here to debate Albus.
The doors to Albus' office were open and Albus was behind his desk with his usual stacks of parchment. Severus wondered - not for the first time - if Hogwarts wouldn't benefit from a Headmaster who was entirely focused on the school.
It took Albus a moment to look up, his eyes darting from Severus' face to the piles in his hands and back again. "Severus?"
Severus stepped forward and set the pile on Albus' desk. "I'm here to tender my resignation from the school and from the Order. You'll find everything in place. I've made recommendations for the Potions position and I recommend Gemma for Slytherin's new Head of House." He met Albus' eyes but kept his occlumency shields up. Albus would never enter his mind again.
"May we speak about this?" Albus asked.
"We may, but I will not be dissuaded."
Albus watched him for a long moment. "You spoke with Rachel."
"I did. She will not keep secrets from me. Did you expect her to?" Severus clamped down on his anger again.
"No, I did not expect her to, I would merely suggest that Rachel may not have a full picture of all that has occurred."
"Rachel was a horcrux, was she not?" Severus asked, hearing the edge in his words.
"Yes, she-"
"And you knew this?"
"Yes-"
"From what point were you certain?"
"I suspected from the time she had a vision of being Voldemort's snake. I was certain when she began to locate the horcruxes. As I anticipated, the horcruxes were able to call to each other, like calling like," Albus said.
"Then I do not see what more we have to discuss."
"Severus-"
"You betrayed us!"
"I can see why you would feel that way," Albus began.
"No. You do not. You do not have a child. You should have told us from the time you told us about the horcruxes." Severus would not bend on this. He should have been told. Rachel should have been told.
"If you had known, you would have taken Rachel and fled, would you have not?"
"To save her life, yes, I would have. I should have done so anyway. If I had been thinking clearly and not allowed my judgment to be clouded by yours, I should have taken her as soon as the Dark Lord returned."
"And thus condemned magical Britain."
"I do not care about magical Britain, I care about Rachel. She is my responsibility. She is my child." Damn magical Britain for all he cared. Let it burn.
"I knew you would react thus, so I didn't tell you. I could not tell you. You know how to make the choice of one life against thousands, but you could not make that choice for your daughter. So I did," Albus said.
Severus stared at him, his anger growing. Albus showed no remorse whatsoever. Severus supposed he should be surprised by that at this stage. "You have everything you need for the next person to take my position. Rachel and I will be departing the castle shortly. Do not contact me again."
"Severus."
He ignored him and left Albus' office for the last time. He was finished with him. He was through being manipulated and he would not allow Rachel to be manipulated either. It was time to leave.
Rachel usually left her trunk alone until she needed things from it over the summer, but she felt the need to unpack. The idea that she wasn't returning to Hogwarts still felt odd, but she supposed she would grow used to it in time. The idea that she didn't have summer homework assignments also felt odd. She wasn't quite sure what she'd do with herself while she waited for her NEWT scores until the time came for her to join the Wizengamot.
Her clothes all went in her wardrobe. Looking over them she saw that some of her things were growing to be a little threadbare. She would need to go shopping once it was safe to go out. She was going to need some robes that weren't Hogwarts student robes as well. It was also a little odd to realize that she would never go back to wearing her Hogwarts uniform.
Her books, except for her current two-way book, her journal, and the two-way book she'd been keeping with Severus and Professor Dumbledore, went onto her bookcase. She definitely needed a new bookcase - this one was practically bulging even with her books double stacked. Her current two-way book went into her desk so she could speak with her friends in a little bit. Her journal went into the drawer of her bedside table. Her two-way book with Professor Dumbledore and Severus already had the locking charm on it that Professor Dumbledore had taught her and that went into the back of her wardrobe with all of the other things she didn't want to look at. She'd have to figure out something to do with all of that stuff - which included her Lockhart books, the textbook that Umbridge had them use, and the Triwizard Cup trophy - but for now it could just stay there.
For now her school bag also went into her wardrobe, though she removed her invisibility cloak, her spy scope, and the Marauder's Map. She wasn't sure what she'd do with the map now that she wasn't in the castle, but it was nice to have something that was her father's. She decided for now to tuck it away with her mom's jewelry box. Her stuffed bunnies went on her bed, her camera went on her desk along with the pictures she'd already developed. She would put a fresh roll of film in her camera later and start using it again. It felt like it had been a long time since she'd taken a picture. Her Walkman and her cassettes went on her bedside table. She needed some more batteries, but she could pick a small pack up when they went to get groceries in a little bit. She decided she wanted to listen to all of her cassettes over the next month. It had been a long time since she'd been able to simply relax and listen to music. It would be nice to get some new books as well.
She set aside all of her piles of parchment to sort through later. She wouldn't need to keep most of it, but there were a few assignments that she wanted to keep, such as potion modifications and spell modifications she'd written for Potions and Arithmancy. All of her notes were in her two-way book, so she didn't feel that she would be missing anything by vanishing the rest of her school work.
Her potions kit and cauldron she left in her trunk for the time being. She'd figure out what to do with them later. With her brooms waiting in the corner, that took care of just about all of her unpacking. Maybe she'd go flying in a little bit. She checked out the window and it seemed as though it was a nice day outside despite the clouds.
Downstairs she found Severus surrounded by boxes as he moved books to the shelves.
"Want help?" she asked.
"Not at the moment, but thank you," he said. "Let's plan to go to the grocers in an hour or so."
"Can I get new batteries?"
"Yes, of course."
Rachel sat down on the sofa and watched him unpack. It seemed like he had a specific order he wanted his books in. "What am I supposed to do this summer? I don't have any homework."
Severus turned to look at her. "Take a break. Spend some time recovering and resting. You've been through a great deal these past few years and you have not had a safe space to rest without the threat of the Dark Lord invading your mind. Give yourself some time and do some things that you would like to do."
"Are you going to take a break too?"
"Yes. I am. I'll spend some time getting the house in order, design plans for the greenhouse and build it, and decide on a course of study while developing brew contracts."
"That doesn't sound like taking a break," she pointed out.
"I assure you, compared to teaching at Hogwarts, being the Head of Slytherin House, being a member of the Order, and navigating the war, it is indeed a break," he said, looking a little weary.
Rachel thought that Severus was just like her in that he needed things to stay busy with. And he was right. Anything that was not dealing with the war was a break. "Can you help prepare me to take my Wizengamot seat? Torey told me some, but I still feel like I need more information. Do you think there's a book or something?"
"I will help prepare you. Draco, Neville, and Black would also be reasonable resources. Black has been on the Wizengamot for several years now and should know where the factions lay. Draco and Neville would have been prepared to take seats on the Wizengamot from the time they were children and should also have a unique perspective for you. I'd prefer if you didn't seek Albus' advice for this."
"You realize I am going to be on the Wizengamot with him? I will probably have to speak with him at some point," she said, wishing she knew how to help fix this. Torey said not to, but it was uncomfortable to have Severus be so angry at Professor Dumbledore that he didn't want her to even speak with him.
"There is a difference between speaking to him and accepting his advice and guidance. You will undoubtedly need to speak with him at the Wizengamot and at Ministry functions. Be polite, let him speak to you, but do not trust what he has to say. He has betrayed us in a most fundamental way. I suspect he will do so again if it furthers his goals and you are still in a uniquely vulnerable position. We will discuss that more before you start going out in public." His mouth was now fixed in a frown that was almost a grimace. "I wish I could tell you that this will be easy."
Rachel shook her head. "If it's not more difficult than having the Dark Lord in my head, then I can manage it."
Severus looked sad as he watched her. "No, I do not expect it will be more difficult than that. The bulk of the war is over. There will still be a few attacks, but nothing like we've seen in the past two years. We will keep you safe. The Minister and the MLE knows that you are still vulnerable and that you are at the top of the list for who the Death Eaters would like to kill. They will want revenge, but we will keep you safe, I swear it."
"I'll be alright," she said, because he seemed to need that reassurance more than she did.
"You will." He watched her for a moment more before turning back to his bookshelves. "Think on what you'd like to eat for the next week."
"I will. I think I'm going out on my broom. Just let me know when you're ready to go to the grocers," she said as she stood up.
"Fly safely."
"I will. I always do."
He turned to raise his eyebrows at her.
"I will fly safely," she promised as she went back up the stairs. She supposed she needed to make a decision as to whether or not she was going to try out for the League, but that could wait a few days. If Severus had problems with the way she flew at Hogwarts' games, he definitely was not going to enjoy seeing her play for the League. Could be worse though, could be the National team.
She retrieved her broom and tied back her hair. For now she was just going to fly and take a moment for herself. She thought she needed that.
Thank you for joining me for this story and for all of your comments, likes, and subscriptions! Please join me next week for the start of Heavy Snow. I recommend subscribing to me if you'd like a notification.