New Start Plus: in spaaaaace!

by omaster43

Nick Walters and his merry band of misfits are back with a story about helping Shepard and crew fight giant eldritch robot abominations, most likely through Dumb magic and crazy shenanigans This is a continuation of my previous story, so reading that one first is recommended. but I'm not your nanny you wanna be confused that's your choice. Oc-insert, just came from Dragon age

1. Chapter 1

Ch.1

Oops. (Pilot)

-/-

Nick POV

How did I get here? I asked myself for the millionth time. As counselor David motherfucking Anderson had his pistol trained on my precious shoulder melon.

"So... This is awkward~," I started, trying to calm the situation. I pointed to the gun, "Can you~, ya know~?" I mimed lowering the gun.

"Nicky~!" Sky's voice came from the portal.

Shit~, "David!" he actually jumped at his name, "Put that thing down before-"

But it was far too late as Sky walked through the portal, Sky Skipper, great dragon polymorphed as a dark-skinned human woman, standing just over 8 feet, silver hair, hair, tail, and scales, and was wearing her red loincloth and chest wrappings.

"Beach time!" she yelled with all the excitement of a woman ready for a break, only to see a metal space station. Looking over she spotted David pointing his gun at me. At first, she didn't know what was going on but after a moment her pupils turned to slits.

It all happened so fast.

One second Sky was behind me the next she was grabbing Anderson's gun, crushing it like it was wet clay, causing Shepard to react by reaching for his gun only to make the classic blunder of forgetting her tail, so you could imagine his shocked look as Sky's dragon appendage, covered in scales that were tougher than steel, came up and slap the stupid off his face, launching him across the steel floor. This of course got Grunt to roar and charge, and bless his dual hearts, he tried his best, but you shouldn't fight a dragon using only your fists. Sky grabbed him by his armor and launched him into the lake, he immediately started treading water.

"Someone should save him..." nobody did anything, "... you guys suck!" I removed my sandals and shirt and dived in after him. He looked terrified, clearly, he's never been in a large pool of water, grabbing him around the waist I dashed upwards exploding out of the water and landing on dry ground, Grunt immediately started coughing out water. "You're not supposed to breathe in the water!" I huffed.

"Shut up!" he coughed.

Looking over to Sky I found Garrus and Solus on their back, and Sky grabbing Miranda and Jack by their necks, mouth open, and ready to unleash a full-powered dragon-breath down their throats.

"ENOUGH!" I roared, unleashing my intimidation at full power, freezing everyone in place. Standing to my full height I looked at a startled Sky. "Down," I ordered. She tried staring me down, but I didn't relent. She gave a soft whimper, but still let the women fall to the ground, and huffed walking back to Jak and Dogmeat. I leashed my power and took a deep breath, "Now-" Grunt roared and rush me from behind only to phase right through me and dropped to the floor, "-My name-" I started, as I walked over to Grunt placing my foot on his hump keeping him in place, "is Nick Walters, interdimensional traveler, mage, very wet."

Here we go again.

-/-

Skyhold... needed a bit of a cleanup.

One year~, it took one whole year of negotiations with Anora for Telsa to finally get the land where Skyhold was located. I of course was on vacation~, we visited the city of the broken mountain, returned to Rezum, visited Jak and Julee's parents, Jasmine had a bouncing baby boy, Jeff, for a moment I thought he was going to look purely human but John explained that Tieflings grew their tails and horns starting at the age of four.

We eventually returned after months of not fighting darkspawn underground, drinking alcoholic drinks at a resort, and just enjoying life traveling the world, so by the time I got back I was ready for some castle fun, unfortunately, the Orlesians were causing a stink because I was too close to their border, but that only made Anora happier to sell the land to me. Orlais demanded Haven if I'm taking Skyhold. Anora laughed so hard she snorted at the Orlesian ambassador. Haven was inside Ferelden, passed the frostback mountains, no, that wasn't a fair deal.

Now, I wasn't in the room where it happened, but if Cailan was to be believed, Anora tore that man a new asshole and had him crying by the end of the meeting. Now, Cailan wasn't a good liar by any measure, which is why he always leaves our monthly game of Wicked Grace poorer, so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Eventually, Anora and Telsa came to an agreement in which they both get something, and Orlais gets to pay.

Skyhold was huge, the game does it no justice. It had a gazillion rooms, and everything was broken in one way or another, Jak, Astral, and Sky were ecstatic though. Skyhold was close enough to Sky's other cave where she could move most of her things over, Jak loved the aesthetics, and the fact that it was quite difficult to siege. I just had a legion of golems clean up the rubble so I could start repairing the place.

Skyhold

Known as Tarasyl'an Te'las ("the place where the sky is held up/back") in ancient elvish, Skyhold is a fortress located in a stretch of the Frostback Mountains near the Dales, on the border between Orlais and Ferelden, controlling a mountain pass from the kingdom to the empire.

5,943/50,000 Durability

Love me tenderly, this place was messed up~. We found evidence that this used to be a settlement for elves, dwarves, and some mages. I just started using the Reparo charm on everything, and when that couldn't work, I just used materials and my construction skill to fix up the rest. It didn't take long before the castle was looking brand new. Dagna, Julee, and I, started going hog wild slapping durability and mana-absorbing runes on everything, which we connected to the massive Arc Reactor under the castle that was used to power the atmospheric bubble that circled the valley of Skyhold, keeping it an average 72 degrees. With the temperature at my most comfortable, I started adding defenses, I wouldn't put it past Orlais to send people to harass me so I had 4 dozen robo-golems, 4 dozen knight golems, and a full legion of earth golems patrolling the valley. With the golems in place, I started placing Firebolt turrets on every corner of Skyhold and on top of a few platforms I made along the Orlesian side of the path.

So, you can imagine my surprise when a conga line of a few hundred people started knocking at my gate.

"Hum, Nick Walters?" the leader asked.

Human farmer

Steven of Lothering

Lvl: 4

Age:54

Steven is a farmer, his father was a farmer, his grandfather was a farmer, and his child will most likely be a farmer. Born in Lothering he believed he would die in Lothering but when the King warned of an upcoming Darkspawn raid, he got his family to Redcliffe and waited for the blight to blow over, but now that it has, he has found that his lands have been blighted and unsafe to work.

He's nervous about meeting you.

"Yes~, how may I help you?" I asked through the little door flap I put in the main gate to see visitors.

"Um, Queen Anora asked me to give you this," he answered passing a letter through the door.

"Sir Walters of Skyhold, I, queen Anora, daughter of blah blah blah, skip skip skip, as a baron of Ferelden you are required to help her people in a time of need, yep yep, uh-huh uh-huh, words~. If you have any questions, please send a letter and I'll get back to you in 2 to 5 business years. 2 to 5 years! I got a goddamn phone! You got a phone!?" the nerve! I looked back to Steven who was now in the background with a bunch of needy hungry kids taking center stage. GODDAMNIT! "Just... come inside" I sighed.

After calling and getting sent to voice mail for the fifth time, I called Telsa, who explained to me that because I now owned land it was my responsibility to use it to provide for the people of Ferelden. Meaning that the valley needed to produce something, meat, crops, metals, anything Ferelden could use or sell, and since Ferelden had an excess number of farmers and with their fields tainted, they needed a new place to work... and I just raised the heat to a decent farming temperature.

So, I got to work. First things first Skyhold wasn't a place to have normal civilians, it has the rooms but you couldn't really farm up there, the fortress was built on a literal mountaintop, like someone sliced off the top of the mountain and slapped a fort on it, the farmers didn't believe that you could grow anything on its poor soil. My next thought was the Valley, Skyhold was in between two mountains, now I'm not a professional farmer, but I did learn that loose soil travels down due to rain and natural erosion, meaning that the best soil would be located in the valley. Unfortunately,~, with my atmospheric bubble warming things up, any snow trapped in the mountains was melting causing a bit of flooding causing a small lake in the valley.

So, I thought around it, if I couldn't make farms in the valley, I would make them out of the mountains themselves. Sereda and I started carving the mountains into terrace steps, making them flat enough for people to farm and have homes. We also made paths for run-offs, but the soil still wasn't the best so we had to go down into the valley and start shoving as much topsoil into large magical expanded crates and spread it over the new farmland.

It all went pretty smoothly, if time-consuming. By the end of the month, I was able to finish my little village and get the moochers out of my castle, but I forgot that they needed something to farm so I bought a load of seeds from the Gamer's Store with a good chance of growing in this temperature and condition, it was kinda random, grapes, corn, potatoes, rice, barley, and wheat. Boom, nailed it! Unfortunately, I somehow forgot that people need to eat and crops needed time to grow!? So, I had to bring in wildlife to the valley below for people to hunt and eat as they grew food, and after that should be self-sufficient, but since I'm now in a goddamn Sims game, the people needed a way to trade with the outside world, Sky Valley, as the villagers now called it, had great natural defenses but those very same defenses blocked it from the outside world, so I needed to create a train station in the mountains which helped connect Skyhold to the rest of Thedas, but surprise-surprise people needed to work there so things were filed correctly and delivered, so I hired some people, but guess what!? The people I hired, worked at the farms! So, I made golems to help the farmer whose children were now working for me, but guess what, AGAIN! The people I hired didn't read at my preferred level so I had to teach them to read and write to an appropriate level.

After four months of putting out metaphorical fires, I was finally able to just put up my feet and relax, so it was a perfect moment for a group of elves to knock on my door. Apparently, these were Elven lands and I was trespassing, and if I didn't leave, I would be evicted. I then proceeded to get my origami skill as I folded every fool who had the balls to try and steal my house. 49 whimpering elves later we came to a mutual understanding that this was now my house and they had to live with that, but I wasn't a monster so I created a nice section to the already growing village for Dalish elves that were passing through the valley, a bit too nice as some didn't leave making the village their permanent home. Things were going pretty well for a while; the Dalish elves lived in these parts for a while so they knew the lands better than the villagers, so they handled the hunting and gathering, as the villagers handle the farming and livestock.

The first problem came when a chantry official arrived in town trying to establish a chantry, causing strive with the dalish elves. I stomped on that shit hard. I made it clear that no religious organization had the right to make any rules in the valley, this was a place of peace, pray to whoever you want, but if you cause problems for others, I'll become the solution. They didn't take me seriously, the chantry official started preaching about how the Elves were heretics and I, a freak of nature, I stripped them of all their clothes put a chain around their neck, and had a golem march him out of town and toward Val Royeaux with a letter about teaching their failures to follow rules.

After that people tended to follow my very few iron-clad laws.

Freedom of speech

Freedom of religion

Don't be an asshole

And that was it, the village had other laws but I let them handle that.

The Chantry didn't seem to like my advice and sent a group of mercenaries led by templars to teach me a lesson, I returned their heads. I wasn't in the Chantry's good books, and since the Chantry owned Orlais, I wasn't in their good books either, not that I cared. They sent a letter stating that they would not do business with me. I laughed and had Telsa markup everything that goes to Orlais by 1000%, I got another letter from the empress that the Chantry didn't speak for the empire, but I didn't care, I'm petty like that, so I kept the markup, if Orlais can't control their pet religion they should handle the consequences.

It wasn't long before a new group of people showed up to Sky Valley, the Avvar mountain people came into the valley probably following animal migration, they were a bit surprised to see a group of people make the valley their home, with it being empty for such long time. Wanting to make a good relationship with somebody this year, I created an outpost for them to stay. They traded with the village and vice visa, there was a small incident wear an Avvar woman kidnapped a man she was dating, turned out she wanted to marry him, we had a celebration, I held nothing back.

It was four weeks after the wedding when the next problem showed up. A kid, no older than 8 accidentally lit his hair on fire, he was ok, nothing a bit of healing hands couldn't fix, but the question finally came up, what do we do with any children who show magical potential? Some wanted to send them to the tower in Ferelden, others didn't trust the tower after the demon infestation, and some of the Dalish didn't want their children to go somewhere they didn't trust, they all had valid points so I came up with a solution. If the kids couldn't go to the tower, the tower had to come to the Valley, so with Telsa's and Neria's connections I hired as many magic teachers as I could magic at the new school I created across the valley to the other mountain, that way the kids had plenty of space to practice their skills and give the parents peace of mind.

Of course, I called the school Hogwarts, duh, but it didn't stay a place for witchcraft and wizardry for long, as more people arrived in the village thanks to the train station, they needed to learn more skills. So, I added a few more classes to the school, nothing too serious... at first. There was the regular, math, writing, and reading, with my Teaching skill it didn't last more than a month for people to gain literacy and the mind for finances, any kids with magic had to take a few more such as, Magic 101, Charms 1, Fade logic, and basic fighting spells.

It wasn't until one of the kids who went for reading lessons asked if I could help teach them how to use a sword, and things kinda spiraled out of control after that. Suddenly there were classes for swordsmanship, archery, advanced farming, cooking, marketing, novel writing, butlering, merchant training, rune making, languages, cartography, exploration, music, just about everything under the sun, and some stuff under the ground, like mining. I had Telsa hiring people like crazy, at first, she was annoyed at all the hiring I was doing for such a small village, but then her eye gained a scary gleam. A week later we got a royal message, from Cailan himself as the messenger, the little village was in awe as the King of Ferelden came to their little slice of nowhere.

I was a little suspicious when he asked if he could see my new school. I still showed off of course, I presented its artful walls and smooth marble floors, its beautifully decorated classrooms, dorms, and Practice halls, its courtyards and massive dining hall and kitchen, I doubt Rowlings would call this her Hogwarts but it was mine. It was also protected using golems, runes, and holy magic.

since Hogwarts started off as a magic school and not wanting any demonic accidents I had, Ayla, Ava, and Sereda bless it from evil as well as having Magic Dream catchers throughout the dorms and hallways, no mage had said anything about demons in our bi-monthly meetings, so I guess it was working. Turns out the crown wanted Hogwarts to be the rival to the University of Orlais and was willing to front some of the bills, I agreed to it but only if it was opened to everyone, civilizations that only have a smart few tend to live in the dark, if everyone had Intelligence finding Wisdom was easier.

Agreeing with me, Cailan made Hogwarts Ferelden's prestige university, Hogwarts grew nearly five times its original size. In less than a year the little village on a mountainside was growing into a city, I of course grew the city way from the farms. Unfortunately, this growth came with its own problems, for the first time in a long time, there was a report of serious crime in the fast-growing village. So, I needed to make a police force, golems were muscle not guardsmen, so I started making more calls, one of those calls was to Duncan, with Grey Warden love being at an all-time high I asked if he could send some trainers to teach people to keep the peace, it cost me 4 more griffons and a warden outpost but I got a team of Grey Wardens being flown in by Aeden, Morrigan, and their baby girl, not gonna lie, the baby being a girl was a complete fluke. I didn't have any power over that and wasting my wish on a god dragon that tried to eat me wasn't on my list of things to do. Dogmeat and Pancake were happy to see Princess again, most of the pups were gone now finding their own partners and having their own adventures, the only one still with their parents was the one next to baby Joyce Cousland, the second girl to be born to the Cousland clan in a century.

Aeden's wardens were a colorful bunch of misfits, Oghren was here, which explains why Felsi was here in her new bar and baby, Sigrun a female dwarf with all the restraint of a child in the middle of a sugar rush, Nathaniel Howe, was... grumpy, for a lack of a better word, I guess your father becoming a devil and trying to take over the world tended to not endear you to people, Velanna a dalish elf that shook my hand so much I thought I was going to lose it, apparently her sister was infected by the blight but after Theron and Aeden shoved enough Cure-All potion down her throat to cure a dragon she got better. It was good to see that my Cure-All potion could help even those who's been infected by monsters like the Magisters Sidereal. And lastly was a young human woman by the name of Mhairi, I thought she died in the game, it became clear after saw that she had Chi. Man, those wardens work fast.

As I gave them your griffons, I bestowed them with power causing their states to skyrocket, if I'm hiring Wardens, you better believe I'm getting the best for my buck. With the news of Warden-Commander Aeden Cousland coming to teach the new city guard, long lines stretched around the Guard HQ to apply for the police department. I made a warden outpost on top of the mountain, giving the wardens privacy and a place to use their griffons without the worry of crushing someone.

Sky City was coming along great. Which led me to my master plan, of not working anymore! I didn't want to do this in the first place, nearly a year of non-stop work led me to believe that any ruler had no life and was obsessed with watching numbers go up and down, crime down, money up, people up, magic accidents down, magic children up, Orlesian hate up, Ferelden graduates up, I was tired of it! I just wanted to take the women in my life out on dates and laze around, occasionally make cool things with the people I love, explore, and just have fun. So, when Sky City finally reach my desired population, I created a council, the plan was simple, Sky City was split into ten different sections, these sections would vote for a representative, the representatives would work for the betterment of the city, they only had 3 years in office before being replaced, with only being able to fill an office once, I then had Telsa hire someone to manage the books, someone to handle any repairs the city needed, someone to handle community upkeep, like sports, football or what my American soul called soccer, was growing crazy popular, and festivals. Satinalia was around the corner and people were excited about the crops being harvested, and with my uncaring want to haggle I just bought 80% of its wholesale and then donated to the City's party planner, which was Neria at the moment.

I created the thing everyone hated, bureaucracy. And that bureaucracy would make anything coming my way have to make a stupid number of hoops, to the point that it would be easier just to hire someone to handle that problem. Sure, I was still around for important decisions and had the power to veto stupid laws, but at the end of the day the city could work without me.

So, as I sat on my couch with the women in my life, my feet up on my ottoman, cool drink in my hand, ready to piss the day away, Theron called.

"I found one."

-/-

Kirkwall was a big city, an old city. You could see its architecture slowly changed as you got further away from the Hightown. It also smelled, not just of shit, but... blood? I could almost taste the copper in the air. I didn't even land near the city, I just flew off to the nearby mountain, but just passing Kirkwall made my stomach churn, how could anyone live in a place like that?

Mother Base caused a bit of a commotion, but Kirkwall already had a train station, so seeing flying objects wasn't new. Theron met me over Sundermount a mountain just north of Kirkwall on his griffon, he then led us to his clan's camp. The Sabre clan was... rough around the edges, only having about 40 members, they didn't trust humans very much but they gave me the benefit of the doubt as Theron and Tamlen vouched for me.

"So, you got something for me?" I asked.

"You have my island?"

"Pish, you have so little faith in me?" he gave me an eyebrow, "I had my golems start construction the moment I got the land for Skyhold." I passed him some photos, "didn't want you doubting me."

"Looks good," he complimented my work, as he passed the photos to his clan. "Some of my clan are unhappy with giving up an ancient elven artifact, but seeing what they can receive, may calm them down."

"Oh, there's no need to worry~, I'm not keeping the eluvian, or did you forget what happened to you? No, I'm just going to study and create my own, safer that way I think. If they want, they can be there when I study it, saves me the trouble of hiring assistants to take notes, I was just going to use some of the rune study students."

"you're an insane professor," he drawled.

"Thanks~. So, let's get this thing loaded up and get your clan room and board and get back to Skyhold."

"nnnn~, about that?" he groaned.

"Let me guess, it's trapped behind a magical barrier that you couldn't break?" I asked summoning a magical tool kit.

"No, nothing so... fantastical."

"Deep roads?" I summoned a flamethrower.

"Nope."

"Noble's bedroom?" I put a rose between my lips and batted my eyes.

"incorrect."

"Vault?" summoning a tux and blowtorch.

"negative."

"We're going to be here all-day Theron, what's going on?" I shoved everything back into my inventory.

"My sister has it." I brought back the rose only for Theron to slap it out of my hand, "No, none of that. She some how recovered enough of the pieces of the eluvian that messed me up and put it back together."

"A self-healing rune?" Julee asked, getting more into the conversation.

"If it had one, I didn't see it. In fact, I didn't see any runes," he answered.

"Mmm, hidden in the mirror's design?" Dagna thought out loud.

"Decent security, making it difficult to copy or study," Lyna added.

"So... where is she?" I asked. I knew where she was, I just didn't want to go.

-/-

Kirkwall was worse on the ground, the only people who came with me and Theron were Dagna, Ayla, and Jak. Walking up to the northern gate we were greeted by templars instead of by city guards. I didn't like how they ordered me to get on my knees, I of course acted like a gentleman.

"I'm not your mother last night!"

After beating them unconscious no one stopped us as we walked through the city. I wasn't in the mood to explore the city but Jak and Ayla had the 'exploration bug' so we ended up visiting Hightown, where more templars showed up, which we used to decorate the floor, Lowtown, where more templars showed up, which we used to decorate the floors, we finally reached the Alienage where, surprise-surprise, more templars showed up, which we used to decorate the floors. I'm guessing this is where any templars that left Ferelden were stationed.

Knocking on Merrill's door we find out she wasn't even home.

"Stop right there! You crazy- Nick?" turning I found Garrett Hawke, his golem guard, and his little group of misfits. There was Fenris, the lyrium-tattooed elf with the voice for acting, Aveline, the guardswoman, Varric, the renowned author with the chest hair of an 80's rug, Isabella, the pants-less one, Sabastian, the chantry's whipping boy, and finally, Merrill, the girl I was looking for, Anders, Bethany, and Carver were missing.

"Garrett!" I greeted, "Good to see you got to Kirkwall safe, didn't get many calls after you left Ferelden."

He pulled out his phone, the poor thing looked like someone crushed it with their bare hands. "Remember how I told you I got help getting to Denerim, well it was Flemeth, had to do a job for her in return, and she then destroyed it, because... reasons, I don't know, she just said she didn't want me telling people she was in the Free Marches or whatever."

"Sounds about right." I tossed him a new Mk.6 mirror phone, it was bigger, had better picture resolution, simple games, some of my books, and it could take one hell of a beating. He immediately took a picture of himself.

"Theron? What are you doing here?" Merrill asked, taking the lead.

"I'm here for the eluvian Mary," he had his arms crossed, back straight, full glare, he just when full big brother.

"What? No! I almost have it!"

"ENOUGH!" I think this was the second time I've ever seen Theron angry. "That thing nearly killed me and Tamlen. Enough is enough. You're handing that thing over."

"... No." her voice was shaky but absolute.

The thunderous look that grew on Theron's face made me take a step away. He didn't say a word, just turned grabbed her door, and ripped it straight off the house.

"Theron! NO!" Merrill yelled, running in after him. From the doorway, I found out the living conditions of the elves here were not great, small, cramped, and barely enough to fit one person. Theron came around a corner with the eluvian in one hand and Merrill trying to stop him with the other. "Theron! Please!"

He showed me the eluvian.

Elven eluvian

Durability 29/400 (brittle)

MP 0/1000

Password: none

The elves of Arlathan left no roads to travel between their cities. Instead, they used these enchanted mirrors to communicate and travel from great distances, using a type of magic different from that of the modern Circle of Magi or even the Tevinter Imperium.

Do you wish to repair elven eluvian?

8 silver ingots, 20 pounds of copper salts, 20 pounds of glass, 1000 MP, and runic repair (expert)

Taking the mirror, I popped the glass out of the frame before accepting.

The mirror lit up like the sun morphing and changing as my skill took effect, missing runes flashed through my mind, adding to my rune skill. It took a moment but the mirror was back to its original 10 feet, I then made a frame around it made of magic Redwood, which I added runes that kept it from falling.

"How~?" Merrill looked awestruck.

"New password, butts-butts-butts," the mirror flashed before powering down. I nodded to Theron, "It's good, the runes are strange, like the elven armor, but with enough time we could figure them out."

"What runes?" Ayla asked, "There was a flash and then it was bigger."

"I'll explain later. Alright Theron a deal's a deal, let's go get you your island and the hell out of this place." I said, shoving the mirror into my inventory. "How anyone lives with this smell is beyond me."

"Not everyone has magic toilets," Theron huffed letting Merrill go.

"Your new house does~," I teased.

"The eluvian!?" Merrill screamed.

I patted my chest, "Nice and safe in my hammerspace." I gave Theron time to talk with Merrill, as I met with Hawke and his friends. "oof~, big boy's been through an ordeal~," I commented looking over Hawkes golem.

"Uhm, is Merrill going to be, okay?" Hawke asked looking over to an annoyed Theron giving his younger sister a dressing down.

"She's fine, Theron's just been through a lot, seen more than any normal man should, he knew a bit more of what his sister was messing with. Have you ever been cut by a blade?" he nodded, "how did you react when your brother played with one?"

"Not... well," he admitted.

"Now imagine if it was the taint." Hawke had to take a deep breath, "yeah, not many do-overs."

"Carver... joined the Wardens," He admitted, "Some stuff happened, he's ok, just... it was way too close."

"Theron's a Warden commander, maybe he can keep an eye on him, ya know where he's stationed?"

"Weisshaupt, he had to go through basics."

"You still have his number?"

He blinked at me for a moment, "No, but I think Bethany does, I'll go get it from her."

"Nick, I'm ready to leave this place," Theron huffed, it seemed like he and Merrill are two minds about what happened.

"Well, it was good to see you Hawke, here's a little something~," I reached over and enhanced his Mk.1 knight golem, to an Mk.4 knight golem, "Faster, stronger, and can do math."

"2+2=4," it spoke in a monotone voice.

"Ok... weird but ok," he muttered.

"Wait! We're just going to let him go?" Aveline asked, "We've been following his trail of destruction since the northern gates!"

"I mean... are you going to stop him?" Hawke asked, "You know, the hero of the blight? The owner of the train system? The man with an army of unstoppable golems?"

"I get it."

"Do you? Do you really?" Hawke teased.

"Hum, excuse me, mister Walters, rumors say you worked with the Makers chosen, is that true?" Sabastian asked.

"Ayla! Ya got a fanboy over here!" I called out.

"Ugh," Ayla groaned. "What do you want?" The first time someone came to her praising her name and asking for her help drove her into a stuttering blushing mess. It's been two years since then, and they still come asking for more, nowadays she has a meet and greet on the last day of the month and helps at the hospital 4 days out of the week.

"oh! Uh... hey."

.

.

.

"Okay goodbye. Nick, can we go?"

"Wait! What is the Maker like!?"

"Patient, kind, understanding, doesn't hate mages, doesn't hate elves or dwarves," she answered with the enthusiasm of a dead fish.

"Oof, sorry about her, it's her day off and the templars have been harassing us since we got here. Can you send a letter to whoever is in charge and tell them that the templars here are a little-"

"-a lot-" Ayla corrected.

"Crazy~," Jak finished.

"I'll... see that he gets the message," he muttered.

"You expect me to believe she's the Maker's chosen, probably just a mage with delusions of grandeur," Fenris snared.

"I don't give a fuck what you believe," Ayla cursed, snaring right back. "I don't need your approval, ya mopey, greasy-haired, shitty tattoo-having, stick figure of an elf." Fenris narrowed his eyes at her. "Oh~, what's wrong? Don't like being insulted, ya pencil neck, sword swallower! Your mother should have swallowed you!"

"What did you say?" Fenris growled gripping his sword.

Oh, I'm sorry, you can't hear me over your shattering ego, you might want to get a colonoscopy for all that butthurt, I'd call you a cunt, but you have neither the warmth nor the depth, I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you!"

"OKAY!" I pulled Ayla away, "Clearly Oghren has been teaching you a thing or two. Hawke you might have to give your friend some burn cream... for his burn." I joked pulling Ayla away, "Hey, hey~, sweety? what's wrong? You've never been this upset at someone for questioning your legitimacy before?" I whisper, patting her hair and looking her in the eye.

"I, I don't know? This city's the worst, constant harassment, the smell, I hate this place!" she buried herself into my chest, "Can we just go?" she whimpered.

I pulled her close, "of course." I lifted her onto my chest. "Hawke, I'm gonna have to go, no offense but I hate it here, everyone's on edge, templars rule the city, guards do nothing, and the smell of blood is giving me a headache. I wish you the best of luck, but if you want my advice, leave this hell hole, and go somewhere nicer, at this point a cave in the ass end of nowhere sounds better than here." I passed him a bag of gold, "give this to Merrill, I did kinda just steal her mirror." I gave him a nod and left without saying anything else.

I don't know what it is about Kirkwall, but that place had a corrupting influence.

I blame the smell.

-/-

I'm happy getting the hell out of the Free Marches. After leaving Kirkwall, Ayla was able to calm down and apologize for her attitude. Yeah, something is wrong with that place.

Arriving back at Skyhold I gave Theron and his clan the grand tour of their new castle. I spent the next month, teaching them all her features from the navigation system, which was similar to my trains with the same user-friendly system, to the engines. Theron's castle had one huge arc reactor that powered the whole island, with a backup, in case something happened, and if that happened the ship would autopilot to Skyhold for maintenance. I gained my Master Rank in Teaching after I was finished, which allowed me to create tombs of power allowing anyone to learn minor skills after reading it, but would fade away after use.

Watching, Dareth Shiral, Theron's name for his island, fly up and away was one of my proudest moments. Theron gave me the green light, reporting everything was perfect, and was heading to New Arlathan, the elven city in the Brecilian forest.

With that out of the way, Julee, Dagna, Lyna, and me, turned to the eluvian in our underground base.

Creating an eluvian wasn't as difficult as I thought it would have been, the runes I needed to know we're already shoved into my rune bank, the problem was the outcome. Any mirror we made would connect to the crossroads, we were confused about how a mirror appeared in the crossroads, and how it connected to our new one, but we found out that a new mirror wasn't created, instead the new mirror hijacked the signal of the original mirror, so to fix the problem we went into the Crossroads and created another mirror but changed the signal to something new, returning to Skyhold we made a new mirror with the same signal and bam! New portal. We celebrated like crazy.

Tests after that We're purely experimental, we connected it to a mini-arc reactor for power and made a door that could change signals to open different doors, it was like tuning a ham radio, we even opened a portal to the Shattered library, the mana there was weak, reflecting Thedas outside. doing what I did best, I started copying books unfortunately, every book there was magic in one way or another, but it didn't stop me from just taking the books, no doubt someone will be annoyed at my actions but I didn't really care, the place was powered down I don't think I would get another shot at this. I just have to remember to tell Theron about it later.

Exploring the Crossroads lead us to a tower around it was thousands of mirrors, the elven empire must have been huge. Some were open leading to other worlds, and my observation skill gave me a brief description, some were simple, beach dimension, forest dimension, pillow dimension, I'm pretty sure those were just experiments, but then there were others, Middle-earth, Elfheim, Dalelands, forgotten realms, Azeroth, Albion. There were so many, but even more were shattered, for Solas to do this. How many elves lived here? Did they escape into other worlds? I copied down all the working signals and left. I didn't want to think about it.

Our next goal was to create a new dimensional pocket, somewhere outside the elven pocket. The Qunari were able to break into the elven one and run wild, no, we need another location, somewhere that didn't connect to the Crossroads, that one took longer, not only because it was a mind-bending concept just to do that, but all work and no play makes Nick a dull boy.

I took breaks, went on dates, made love, and traveled Ferelden. I wasn't in a hurry, and I didn't have to go anywhere, sure The Mage Problem was getting worse but Ferelden was on top of it, for the most part, normal people were still fearful of Mages and magic, but as they help create mage-light poles to beat back the dark and work as village healers, people were coming around, it helped that The Vanguard traveled Ferelden, helping the common folk and keeping the peace, Ferelden was coming together, slowly but surely.

It was after First Day when we made our first success, after reading some of the elven books and hooking up the mirror to a large arc reactor. We ended up on a large platform with a white void all around us.

Congratulations! You have created your own Dimension! It's small but it's yours!

We tested it like crazy, did it have a breathable atmosphere? Too cold? Too hot? Are there dangers?

We ended up using a golem to enter the dimension and create another Gateway, making sure if the gate closed behind us, we had a way out. Multiple tests were made, and after it worked for the thousandth time, I built a Base around that platform, everything was labeled, and had enough supplies to feed an army for a couple of years with enough materials to create another Portal, arc-reactor, and detailed explanation on how to create a portal out. no chances, no luck, make it right the first time, every time.

So, we started making portals and sending in golems to give us a sitrep and make a connection. After the 10th safe portal. I made the decision that we should take a break.

The beach dimension sounded like a nice break~.

-/-

John Shepard POV

"So, you're an interdimensional traveler? Let's say I believe you, what are you doing here?" fuck me my jaw hurts like a bitch! But I had to keep up appearances, thank God for medi-gel. Things calmed down after Nick forced everyone to stop, it was horrible, it was like looking a thresher maw in the mouth.

"Whatever the hell I want." he answered, setting up a picnic table in the middle of the goddamn presidium, "What are you? dimensional cops? Huh~, space boy, ya a cop, ya a space cop?"

Okay, a bit hostile, let's calm this down, add the Shepard charm~. "No, no. Just a man trying to understand, why someone wanted to come here?"

"I, wanted to go, to the Beach dimension," he growled.

"yes~, I got that, but this isn't the beach dimension," I pointed out.

"Are you sure?" he pointed to Jack and Miranda, "scantily clad women," he then pointed to the water, where an honest-to-God, dragon was drifting along not caring about the people taking photos, "Water."

I think I know who created the mech, "I feel like there should be more prerequisites for this to be a beach planet."

"John-"

"I don't remember giving you my name?"

"John, listen. The gods are dicks," okay, "and Magic is something even the most intelligent being takes hundreds of years to barely understand, they usually go crazy. I try not to ask too many questions; you never know who's listening. Roll with the punches."

"I got the drinks!" A young lady with blond hair, violet eyes, and pointy ears, wearing a bikini that matched her eyes came through the portal only to freeze. "Nick?"

"Yes, Ayla?"

"This is not the beach dimension," she stated in a monotone voice that I've heard my mother use when I mess up.

"Nope."

"And you didn't say anything?"

"I worked too hard not to see sexy ladies in bikinis." The confidence in this man!?

"Well, I hope you got a good look because you're not getting this for a long time." Not missing a beat Nick twisted and started taking pictures... on his hand-held phone? Magic is weird.

Ayla just sighed, and looked over to me, her eyes widening to the size of dinner plates. "NICK!? By the Maker! What's wrong with that man!" she pointed right at me.

"Ah~ yeah, you would be able to see it better. Space Cop Shepard here is a zombie, sorry, robot zombie."

What?

"Should we put him out of his misery?"

"No," I answered for him. "Listen, I am not a zombie-"

"-Robot zombie-"

"I'm not a zombie of any kind! I was... injured-"

"-Killed-"

"-But I got better." I finished, ignoring Nick's interruptions.

"Did anyone tell your soul? It's not pretty," she stated, grimacing as she looked at me. "Wait maybe I can give him his final rights!" she cheered running back into the portal.

"Should I be worried?" I asked Nick as he placed food on the table. That's a good-looking steak.

He shrugged, "Probably not."

"Can you take this a bit more seriously? You traveled to another dimension and assaulted a highly important political figure!" I growled slamming my hands on the wooden table. If kindness isn't working, it's time to get heated. Anderson was fine but I had Mordin give him a once over.

"Who? David? He shouldn't be pointing guns at people, they aren't toys." he huffed, taking out a watermelon.

"I'm back!"

"BRACE!" Nick yelled at the top of his voice scaring the shit out of me. On instinct, I held on to the table, only for nothing to happen.

"Wha-" My question was cut off as everything started shaking like crazy. Can you have an earthquake in space!? It felt like it lasted a lifetime, but in reality, it probably only lasted about 3 seconds.

"Ya okay, space cowboy?" Nick called out, continuing to put food on the table.

"The hell was that!?" I roared.

"Sorry, probably should have said something. That is what happens when a god enters a new dimension. Well~, it happened every time we enter a new dimension anyway. The gods meet and talk and discuss how things are gonna work. It was short though?"

"What does that mean?"

"Either your gods don't care about a newcomer or they're just not there. Let's pray for the former." he joked. JOKED! About the gods being real!

"Hey! What's going on here!?" a turian C-sec officer with the biggest balls I have ever seen swaggered over to us. "Sir you're going to have to come with me," he ordered to Nick coming over with a pair of cuffs.

"Primlio Quinscus," the turian froze.

"How do you know my name?"

"Q-man do you really think, what you are about to do, is a smart plan?" Nick genuinely asked, I think he was as shocked at Quinscus's moxie.

"The council-"

"Can eat your ass. They already have super space cop interrogating me-" he jutted his thumb at me, "I think they're trying to sacrifice you."

"I'm... sorry, your accent is very thick, I couldn't catch all that." accent?

"He, spectre, job done." How did he know I was a spectre?

The turian just nodded, looked over to me, nodded, and left.

"What was that? You have an accent?"

"Shepard, I'm speaking every language. At once."

"How?"

"Magic. Mordin! What language am I using!?" he called out.

Mordin just looked at Nick extremely confused, "Ja'Salar? Your accent is very thick, where did you learn?"

Nick ignored him, "Grunt! What language am I speaking!?"

"Shut up!" he roared.

"WHAT WAS THAT YOUNG MAN!? DO YOU WANT ME TO GO OVER THERE!?" He sounded like my mom when I talk back.

"I dare you!"

Nick immediately called his bluff and blitzed toward Grunt, I tried to stop him but was well out of my reach before I could do anything, I was then witnessed to a spectacle, as Nick dodged Grunt's sloppy right swing, got under his guard, around his back, and then lifted a 700 pound, 6 and a half foot krogan off the ground and took him to suplex city.

Grunt just groaned on the floor as Nick stood over him, "What's wrong BIG BOY!? Not 2 seconds ago you were all big and mighty, now you're on the floor! Let this be a lesson Grunt, never underestimate your opponent! And talk shit unless you're ready to take a load!" Nick huffed, cracking his muscles, "now come eat, clearly you haven't gotten the necessary protein for the day." What are you, his dad?

"Please hold this." Ayla's voice came from beside me, looking over I found her holding two gold coins and some sort of plant.

"Uh?"

"The gold is for the ferryman, I'm pretty sure you took their boat twice and it's impolite not to give him something for their trouble. And so, we begin!" She then opened her book, and everything changed.

I was floating, everything was, good. Never had I been relaxed like this, always having to be seen as the perfect soldier, never tired, never scared, never hesitant. But now... everything was going to be okay.

"Hey John~, looks like your back." I looked around and spotted a... bartender. His wings were beautiful, his face was at peace, and was calmly cleaning a glass cup. "I'd get you a drink, but I can see you're in a bit of a rush~."

'

"SHEPARD!?"

My eyes shot open, slamming me back to reality, Garrus and Anderson looking down on me.

"Wah? What's wrong? What happened?" Why am I on the ground? My whisky?

"Hey! You can't just interrupt a ceremony like that!" Ayla yelled. Getting to my feet, I found Miranda on the floor again holding her eye.

"What happened?" I asked again.

"I was giving you your final right so you could pass on to the next life, but this idiot!" she pointed to Miranda, "Interrupted! The nerve of some people. Alright let's try this again, please no interruptions."

"WAIT WAIT WAIT!" I called out stopping her. "I'm not dead!"

"Listen, I'm a cleric of the Maker, I got the book, I've read the instructions, and I can see your soul. It's not pretty. Whatever jackass brought you back from the beyond half-assed it at best."

"There are rules to bring people back from the dead?" I asked.

"Yes~, First, contact your god and ask how much it would cost to bring back your soul."

"Cost? Like money?" Garrus sounded bewildered.

Ayla shrugged, "Not always, it tends to vary from person to person, sometimes it's wealth, sometimes it's a favor for a later date, sometimes~, they won't ask for anything, the person coming back is part of their master plan, so they just make up a random amount."

"That sounds crazy," Garrus pointed out.

"Yes, and I am an interdimensional half-elf, that can talk to my god. What's your point?" she deadpanned.

"Well said, continue," Garrus coughed.

"Second, make sure you have the body! Souls return to their original bodies; their god fixes the body back to prime. And lastly! You need permission from the soul to bring it back to the material plane, if you don't do these things, and force a soul back to life things can get ugly."

"Ugly?" I asked.

"Shepard... when's your birthday?" Nick asked.

What a strange question, "It's... uh, um." I... can't remember.

"Who was your first lover?" he continued

"I..."

"What color are your eyes?"

"Blue?"

"Was that a question or an answer?" he asked. "what have you been doing since you returned? Saving the galaxy, right? Nonstop work? Focusing on anything, but what happen to you?"

"I... Might be."

"Are you having nightmares? Do you hear the voice of people who died?"

"I..."

"Don't worry... you will." a shiver crawled up my spine at the confidence of his words.

"Let's say I believe you, what are my options?" I asked.

"Well~," Ayla waved her book side to side.

"Options that keep me among the living!"

"Mmm," she tapped her chin, before opening her book, the calming effect was going back full force. For a second, I thought that I was going back to the bar, but it never got that comfortable. "Oh! We can complete the rest of your revival! All we need is... 2 million metric tons of... Eezo? What's eezo?"

"Okay, no. No one has that much Eezo. I'm pretty sure you're trying to scam me now." I huffed, got a little too hyped up with the 'magic'. Need to get more sleep.

"Nuh-uh, look!" She showed me her book, the letters or symbols or whatever the hell it was bent the world around me, nothing was real, and too real at the same time, I tasted eternity and felt the color that my skin rejected bounce off. She pulled her book back to read but I was too busy to care trying to put reality back together.

"Trippy huh~?" I looked over to Nick passing Grunt some fruit.

"What~?"

"That's Celestial script, the language of the gods, unless you're a cleric, paladin, or celestial, mortal minds can't really handle that, most go crazy," Nick explained.

"Most?"

"Others just... stop. They've seen something beyond their comprehension, and just... sit there trying to understand it. Give Garrus a slap." I looked over to a frozen Garrus who was just looking out into space. I tapped his scars snapping him back to reality.

"Shepard," he whimpered, "What the hell's going on?"

"No idea, things are getting over our pay grade," I answered. "Anderson?"

"I got nothing."

"Hey!" Ayla's voice made all three of us jump, "I think I got something! You can work for the rest of your soul!"

"Uh? What does that mean?" Today's been too long.

"My god, The Maker, is willing to foot the bill if you work for him!" she answered.

"So, I would have to be a... Cleric, I've never been good with religion," I admitted.

"Not a cleric~, a paladin! A hero to the people, a fighter of evil!" She sounded way too excited, and her smile was way too big.

"uh~." I backed away as she got closer.

"Or~," the red-haired woman, with the horns and tail intercepted the holy preacher, "You can ask someone else~. Nick said you're a man who must do dangerous things to keep the galaxy safe, not all of those things are good and righteous. Why limit yourself? My family might be able to do the same, for a small price~." Her glowing sulfur eyes were trying to tear into my soul.

"Jak! What are you doing?" Ayla huffed. Jak just turned to Ayla with a rather... salacious smirk.

"Isn't it simple, my innocent buttercup~?" Jak rubbed her thumb across her lower lip, "The same thing you're doing now, staking a claim. Shepard here, is a mighty hero. If he was under contract, the J-family could gain a foothold in this new universe."

"This is my contract!" Ayla growled baring her teeth.

"And what if I... buy it off you~." everything was getting... fuzzy~.

Ayla's eyes seem to dull for a moment before she snapped out of it, "Begone temptress!" she yelled slapping Jak right in the boob.

"Ahhh!" she squeaked and jumped away. "How!?" she hissed.

"The Maker gives me strength! Begone!" Ayla ordered pointing her book at Jak.

"You win this time~, but mark my words, Cleric, I will have my revenge, no mercy," She hissed.

"Get!"

"NICKKY! Ayla's being mean to me!" Jak ran off to Nick who was now cooking shrimp kebabs over a grill. Mordin was standing next to him plate in hand talking to Nick at a speed that my translator was having difficulty picking up. Nick was just nodding.

"So, just sign here," Ayla gave a piece of paper and a pen. Yeish, a little pushy.

"Listen-"

"Ah! Here I go without showing you proof!"

"Hold on-"

She touched Garrus's face, "Heal ~." Garrus lit up like a candle for a second, as the light faded, Garrus's face... was fully fixed, the scar that would have been with him forever was gone, and his faceplate was fully intact. He looked better than ever.

"Okay." give me a second, let me just... get a handle on what just happened.

"Shepard," Garrus croaked.

"Yeah, buddy."

"My face doesn't hurt."

"There's a good reason for that," I nodded. I gave Ayla my full attention, "So, just sign here?" I asked shaking the pen.

"Yep, and initial here."

"Hold on!" Anderson broke into the conversation, "Shepard shouldn't you read it first?"

"Right~, uh. By signing this contract, I vow to help the innocent-" This was a weird contract, many of the stipulations were very loose, allowing a lot of wiggle room, 'you are allowed to injure the innocent if it saves them' but some were strict rules, 'you must adequately pronounce your spells!', it was also not very long, there was a speculation in the bottom that says more rules might come into play as I continue being a paladin, but that I wouldn't be retroactively punished. Well, that's nice an ex post facto rule. "Yeah, okay this seems good."

"Are you sure you don't want a lawyer to look at it?" Anderson asked.

"Nah, a leap of Faith and all that."

"Didn't you say that before you launched us over that ravine filled with thresher maws?" Garrus asked.

"And we survived. Point proven." I signed my name and initialed, and the paper lit up like a flare and popped out of existence. "so~," a beam of light appeared out of nowhere and a glowing sword lowered from the sky, "whoa~." I reached out and grabbed its handle.

"John Shepard, your goal is worthy and your heart sturdy! You are my paladin! My sword to beat back the darkness! Let your soul be put together with my power, evil shall quiver at the sight of you."

The sword in my hand began to morph, it was a sword, then a spear, sling, crossbow, flintlock, revolver, Semi-automatic, Machine, it just kept changing through models throughout history until it finally stopped at an M-6 Carniflex, it was pure white with golden accents. On one side a symbol of the Maker and on the other a single word, 'Paladin'.

I felt... whole, and tired like the mind is finally listening to my body's complaints.

"Shepard!? Are you okay!?" I turned to Anderson... was he always so short... and kind? It's like... I could see him, his actions, and his motivations. He was worried about me.

"I... I think so."

"Sit and eat, you just grew an extra 6 inches, using a lot of energy." Nick was something, else. Where Anderson was this warm feeling, as if he was a bonfire on a cold night, Nick on the other hand, was like a perfect sphere, unmoving, impenetrable, it would shine for a bit when he talked to others, but always... controlled. "Shepard... what are you doing?"

"Huh? What?" I looked down finding my palm pressed against his back. "Oh! Sorry, I just."

"Saw his soul?" Ayla asked. If Anderson was a bonfire, Ayla was a forest lit a flame. "You need to ease the power going to your eyes before you hit a mana crash."

"How?" Mana Crash?

"Deep breath, in, out, Magic is a muscle, if you think you're in danger, your magic will act to defend you, and since you don't know how to control it, it's just powering everything not knowing how to help," Ayla explained.

In, out, in, out, the flaming forest that was Ayla slowly faded revealing the young woman underneath. "whoa~."

"Yeah, it's pretty crazy the first time."

"This is not the Beach Dimension," a monotone voice called out from the portal, it was another woman, elf, about 5'10, blonde hair, blue eyes, mechanical right hand, with some scars.

"Shepard," Nick called out, "you're gonna wanna brace."

And the world shook, but unlike before, I saw it. A real god. And then... everything went black.

-/-

Nick POV

"You wanna what?" I asked, moving Shepard over to Grunt, Anderson, and Garrus close behind. Jak was having an eating contest with Grunt and losing, Miranda finally got up off the ground, doing a piss poor job of fainting unconsciousness, Mordin was watching the grill, and my Ja'Salar was getting better by the second. I'm pretty sure Mordin was just 'politely' experimenting on me.

"We should help Shepard!"

"And we should do that because~?" The blight was one thing, I had a flying island that could blow them out of the sky, the Reapers though? Fuck that! Those things were planet busters, and let's not forget that if they somehow copy my portal tech they can kill an uncountable amount of people, and I don't want to be responsible for that. I know Shepard can win and now he has a god at his corner, he's fine.

"Niiiick~, come on! Adventure! Action! We've had our vacation, it's time to take ass and kick names!" God, so adorable.

"We're kinda out of our depth here, no? This is a space-traveling civilization, their galaxy is so different than ours, I'm sure we could find a more compatible world to explore." I also didn't want the council to try and lock me up in a box to poke and prod at me.

"Nick, part of adventure needs you to get out of your comfort zone, you came to Ferelden when you didn't have to, why not do the same here?" because guns, terrorists, slavers, ancient cosmic horrors just beyond the breach, take your pick. "I'll do... the thing~."

"Well damn. Alright-"

"YES!"

"-listen." I cut off her premature excitement, "If you really want this, you're gonna need more than just my permission, you have to get the whole family to agree, this isn't something you can just do willy-nilly, AND you must get Shepard's permission."

"Pish! I got this!" She ran off through the portal.

"So... new adventure~?" Jak teased.

"Her eyes were huge! What kind of monster do you think I am?" I grumbled.

"And the tongue thing~."

"I'm not a saint," I shrugged, taking a seat across Anderson, who was looking over Shepard, "So, David. How bad is it?"

"What do you mean?" David Anderson was a man of the people, an N7 soldier, he was an elite fighter, he was not a politician, and he couldn't really pull off being coy.

"John's a paladin. Paladins are only needed when shit hits the fan, and considering that you guys are a galactic civilization, you guys are in it deep," I explained. "That and Garrus has a horrible poker face" We looked over to the turian touching his face. "Garrus, stop touching yourself."

"What!? No... What? Sorry, face exploded," I need to get a translator, "speak good for humans. Humans no speak Zhulthai good."

"I get that a lot, so. What's got the galaxy in such a twist that a god from another Universe had to get involved?" I asked, taking some shrimp kababs from Mordin as he came over with the food.

They looked at each other for a moment. It was David who finally cracked, "Have your people created... machines?"

I shrugged, "We're more of a magic civilization, but we do have trains and I was able to recreate a mini-arc reactor that produces 8 gigajoules of clean energy per second." I jutted my finger to the arc reactor, "and that's before I added runes."

"I'm not an engineer, how much is that?" Anderson asked.

"If what he says is true, it produces over 275 million gigajoules in one galaxic year, it would only take 20 to power the whole Citadel," Mordin explained, "for 5 centuries."

David looked floored, but I was more impressed by Mordin's teaching skills, it would take me at least a few weeks to get a proper handle on a language, but this man taught me in less than an hour.

"that's amazing, how long does it usually last?" David asked.

"I used to use Palladium, but it was inefficient, it barely produced 4 gigajoules a second and would only last about 150 years, depending on what it was powering. Badassium, is far better, last longer, and I can synthesize it."

"Badassium? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!" the tattooed convict laughed food spilling out of her mouth.

"Jenny, don't talk with your mouth full, you are a grown woman," I chastised.

"What ya call me!?" She growled, showing off her teeth.

"Jennifer, 'Jacqueline', 'Jack', Nought," I pronounced every single word, "that's your name, isn't it? What you call yourself~, and since that hot piece of ass" I jutted my thumb at Jak, who flipping patties on the grill, "is already named Jak, so that makes you, Jenny."

"Call me that again," she growled. I laughed, like really laughed, I was snorting and wheezing, I was probably red in the face. "WHAT'S SO FUCKING FUNNY!?" she flared her biotics.

I stopped laughing, "Jenny, I was laughing, because you made a joke. You can't even make a decent threat~, let me teach you how it's done," I leaned forward, "You're a pretty good poet."

Her face drained of color and jumped out of her seat; she looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "H-how?"

"You see the difference now, I'm scary because I know things, you try and be scary by being tough, but I could break you over my knee without breaking a sweat. Your strength means nothing." I stated, relaxing in my seat. "That goes for you too Mary~," I smiled at Miranda.

"I didn't do anything." she side-eyes me.

"Nah, I guess not. It's not like you ripped a soul from its final resting place. It's not like you did such a half-ass job that my gateway 'misfired' bringing me and my loved ones here." My sarcasm was so thick you could have swum in it. "I would hate it if your loved ones were suddenly put in danger's way by someone else's incompetent."

"So sure, it was a god? you could have just made a mistake," she kept her cool but her tiny frown gave her away.

"I tested my gate thousands of times, but suddenly it spits me out here? There's luck, and then there's deliberate action," I drawled. "Just know that we've already started off on the wrong foot, nothing we can't work through as friends, but try and bug my portal one more time, and Harper will get a harshly written letter about what he does with his toys." Miranda's face matched Jenny's but she stayed sitting down. "So," I turned to Anderson who just looked lost, "Why did you wanna know about my world's tech?"

He looked over to my robo-golem, "Is that not a machine?"

"Nah~, that's a golem, an automaton made of Magic, will, and materials. RG-5455 over there is made of stainless steel."

"So... it's not 'alive'?" he asked.

"Nope, what you're thinking about is a Warforged, an automaton created by magic, will, materials, and a soul," I created an illusion of Shayle, "this is Shayle Cadash, over a thousand years old, sassy, and finds our meat suits to be 'inefficient'."

Everyone just looks at illusionary Shayle in awe. "Is she the only one?" Mordin asked.

"No, and I won't say any more about that, it's not my place," what the dwarves had to do to survive was terrible and I think someone like the Illusive man would just do it to give him an advantage.

"I, understand. So. None of your golems have ever gained sentience?" Mordin asked.

"Like an accidental living spell? Not that I know of. Hey, 5455! Are you sentient!?" I asked.

"And pay taxes? No thank you!" it called back.

"There you have it," they all just gave me a deadpan look, "I also put an order in their creation to raise up after an apocalyptic event, ya know, to save them the hassle of having to wipe out civilization, especially if we're just gonna wipe ourselves out eventually~." they didn't change their look, "What? Why can't they have a shot after we fuck up so badly?" I joked.

"You're crazy," Jenny sneered.

"Jenny~. I have an interdimensional portal, I make love to dragons and devils, I've fought monsters from your worst nightmares," the image of Shayle morphed into a Hurlock, black blood dripping from its jagged broken mouth, its white pupilless eyes staring at them, menacingly. "I have seen things," the image began to change, "things that I can never unsee~," I hissed as the image solidified into a brood mother, its disgusting, mutated, mutilated body, for all to see, "I've heard things that can't be unheard," Hespith's broken voice slithered around us.

First day, they come and catch everyone.

Second day, they beat us and eat some for meat.

Third day, the men are all gnawed on again.

Fourth day, we wait and fear for our fate.

Fifth day, they return and it's another girl's turn.

Sixth day, her screams we hear in our dreams.

Seventh day, she grew as in her mouth they spew.

Eighth day, we hated as she is violated.

Ninth day, she grins and devours her kin.

Now she does feast, as she's become the beast.

Now you lay and wait, for their screams will haunt you in your dreams.

But my memory couldn't give its broken and hunted voice justice, "You wanna save the galaxy~? Then you better get ready, 'cause you're gonna be just as crazy~. Just look at Shepard or Garrus, shit look at Anderson! They've seen something. Something, even with all your technology, and space flight, and biotics, they know you're not ready for, but they don't have a choice." I let the illusion fade. "So, David, you wish to enlighten me?"

"We found proof of an ancient machine race that wipes out all advanced life in the galaxy every 50,000 years," David answered.

"Let me guess; it's been 50,000 years," I teased. He just nodded, "And those in charge have shoved their heads in the dirt, and shoved their ass in the air?" he nodded again. "Love me tenderly you guys are in a bad spot. Personally~, I say cut your losses, I can move you to another universe, somewhere away from all this."

"I won't let these people die, not without a fight," Anderson hissed.

"Yeah~, didn't think so~, you seemed like the caring kind, I probably wouldn't have offered if you weren't." I sighed.

"Then why ask?" Grunt asked with a mouthful.

"First, don't eat with your mouth full young man, it's rude," I scolded. "And second, is to test him, to see his morality, I wouldn't blame him if he wanted to get his family to safety, but I wanted to see if he would choose himself over those he commands. You're a good man Anderson, I'm not sure if I'm that noble. I might help someone who asked, probably, but to go out of my way and to risk the people I love for someone I've never met, very few people could do that, and even fewer wouldn't regret it later. So, know this Anderson, if Shepard would have us, I'll do my darndest to keep him alive." I promised. "... and I guess the rest of you as well~." I waved uncaringly.

"You don't seem to care very much~," Jenny huffed.

"How about you put on more armor than just a belt, you exhibitionist!" I huffed back. "And you!" I pointed to Miranda, "You call that armor? Are all battlefields in the future runway shows!? Put on some armor you pervert!"

"The hell! You're not even wearing a shirt!" Jenny roared, not liking my hypocrisy.

"They're called battle shorts." I dusted off my pants.

"Screw you!" She jumped over the table going for my neck only to phase right through me and land on the floor, where I proceeded to boot her over the railing and into the artificial lake. "DICK!" she didn't have much time to curse me out before Sky appeared under her lifting Jenny up in the air on her head, before launching her into the water again. "FUUUUUCK!?"

"Fascinating, not a hologram, nor illusion, incorporeal, only in science fiction," Mordin muttered looking me up and down.

"Or magic~" I teased. "You have an extra Omni-tool?" I asked. He gave me a long look before taking one out of his back pocket. Omni-tools were just bracelets, highly advanced computer bracelets, but bracelets nonetheless.

Omni-tool – standard

Durability 40/40

A multipurpose diagnostic and manufacturing tool as well as a computer used for a variety of civilian and battlefield tasks, such as hacking, decryption, or repair. Omni-tools are handheld devices that combine a computer micro-frame, sensor analysis pack, and mini-fabricator. Versatile and reliable, an Omni tool can be used to analyze and adjust the functionality of most standard equipment, including weapons and armor, from a distance.

Fabricator 0/100

Shields 100/100

"Mmm, do you have any Fabricator omni-gel?" He looked even more confused but passed me some. It looked like Spiderman's web fluid. I started by copying both 30 times and put them away, I then enlarged it to the size of a small chair. Mordin was breathing down my neck at this point.

"What are we looking at?" Julee asked, appearing over my other shoulder.

"Miniature computer, phone, and weapon," I answered not looking away from my prodding.

"Like Ava's arm?" Lyna asked next to Julee.

"Yeah, but more on the scientifical end of the spectrum," I answered.

"Mmm, must have some serious software, it acts almost like a mind rune." Dagna pointed out sitting across from me, next to a confused Anderson.

"Not quite, it still needs some hand and wrist movements to activate, I have no doubt they'll get to that point in time, but they would probably have to have neural implants. Never liked playing with the brain, real touchy," even when I healed people, I'm always careful with the brain.

"So, what are you doing?" Julee asked.

"Strength, mind, capacity, weight, power, maybe a golem," I answered, at this point we've been working for so long everything was short-hand talk. Opening the battery case, I found a battery the size of my fist, removed it, i passed it to Mordin who examined it with great interest. Taking out an Arc-reactor, I placed it back into the battery case

Do you wish to modify Omni-tool with MK.4 Mini-arc reactor?

Accepting, the omni-tool morphed at the mercy of my power, accepting its new power source, I followed that by adding dozens of Rune sentences, met to add durability, direct mind interface, power output, carrying capacity, and Shield strength. I then shoved over a hundred canisters of Omni-gel and shrunk the tool back to regular size.

Do you wish to make Modified Omni-tool into a golem?

Cost: 573 MP

Yes.

The Omni-tool came to life and locked itself around my wrist. With a thought the screen came to life and connected to the extranet, "Interesting~," I summoned one of my satellites, activating it, it hovered 10 feet into the air and blasted off, my Omni-tool was able to sink into my satellites signal and gave me a 3-D map of everything it passed. "ah~, the beauty that is magic and science." There was a soft beeping at the corner of my screen.

Miranda is trying to hack your omni-tool!

Looking over I found Miranda tapping away at her Omni-tool with a confused look on her face. Well~, this is nice~. My omni-tool jumped at my command, everything seemed to fade away before huge blocky letters appeared over my head

HACK ON!

Sudden mini-game!

Mini-game my ass! It felt like I was trying to fish out a whale using a wimpy stick and a string made of floss. The poor thing lasted a second before it shattered.

Hacker got away~.

Better luck next time!

Everything came back into focus.

Due to your hard work and effort, you have gained a new skill!

Hacking - have you tried turning it off and on again? Used to unlock doors, lockers, and other objects that require mechanical means. Every time you hack into anything you will enter a fishing mini-game, people can fight back if they notice your attempt.

Rank novice!

Weapon – Sad fishing rod

I looked over to a smirking Miranda, only for that smirk to die as her omni-tool suddenly stuttered and die, followed by it smoking. She quickly threw it away.

"What was that?" I asked.

"Nothing I-"

"I know you tried to hack me, and I know you took me to pound town, why did your Omni-tool explode?" I asked, cutting off her excuse.

"I... don't know," she admitted.

"Did you download something?"

"I... wanted to see your omni-tool's new features but as I was getting the plans, it just... broke."

"Mmm, maybe it couldn't read it, from what I understand some software needs certain hardware to work properly. Steel golems work better, faster, and can do more things for less compared to my earthen golems. So, maybe when you downloaded the plans, your software tried to upgrade, but your hardware couldn't keep up," I theorized.

"So maybe with a more powerful Omni-tool?" Miranda asked.

"Maybe~, but I think it revolved more on the magic and runes. Was your omni-tool better than mine?" I asked, looking at her and then at Mordin.

"Standard Omni-tool, very basic, nothing out of the ordinary," Mordin answered.

"Other than the spyware~," I teased.

"Sorry, STG, old habit." He didn't sound apologetic.

"Miranda?" I asked.

"Serrice, model 8," she huffed.

"Sounds expensive~," I teased.

"Very," she deadpanned.

"And more powerful, must be hardware, able to hack, but not download, interesting," Mordin mumbled. I left him to it.

"Can I have this?" I asked Miranda, pointing at the now useless bracelet.

"Why?"

"Cause I want it." She rolled her eyes, and waves me away, "Thanks~."

Serrice omni-tool model 8

Durability 0/100

Omni-gel 0/500

Shield 0/800

Do you wish to fix this Omni tool?

Cost: 400 MP, 400 omni-gel, 10oz of copper, 10oz of silver, 3oz of gold

Accepting, the Omni-tool lit up for a moment before being repaired.

"I didn't know you were going to fix it~," she hissed, reaching for the omni-tool but I pulled away.

"Not so fast~," I teased, "this is mine~, one woman's trash is another man's treasure~"

Do you wish to modify Omni-tool?

Cost: 673

Yes

And just like that I had a new and better omni-tool, I tossed my old one to Anderson, and as he caught it, it liquified and ran through his fingers latching itself to his wrist, removing his old omni-tool.

"Wha?" His new Omni-tool came to life with an orange glow, he looked mesmerized.

"Nice~, right? It has a direct mental connection, no more of that hand-waving nonsense~, just think it and it will do it." His new omni-tool sprouted a screen with information, the info flashed by but Anderson seemed to understand what he was reading.

"It has a lot of information about me."

"It should, it's connected to you, it knows everything you know," I grabbed an apple and launched it at him, it wouldn't kill him but it would smart, but right as it was going to bean him, an Omni-shield sprang to life knocking away the pathetic fruit, "I made that little thing into a golem," I jutted my thumb at the steel giant, "like that guy." his omni-shield faded and a screen appeared with a small cartoon figure giving a salute, "whoever was your right-hand man was before, tell them that they've been demoted. That little guy there is now your best friend, he will die for you, if you're ever in serious danger he will do everything in his power to get you to safety, as we speak it's probably learning all your marshal prowess, look~," the little figure was looking at me with a stern glare, "You don't trust me, so it doesn't trust me, it sees me as a possible threat and if it comes down to it, it will try and remove me."

"But... you created it?" Anderson looked shocked, I could understand, I created it not 2 minutes ago and now it saw me as a danger.

"And now it's your best friend, a soldier under your command with undying loyalty."

"You don't consider this to be alive?"

"No, it doesn't have free will or a soul, it wouldn't plan for the far future, only work with the information you gave it. That and it doesn't pay taxes~," I joked. He gave me an incredulous look, "What? There are two certainties in life, death, and taxes. And since it doesn't do one of those~," I shrugged.

"I feel like there are more things to life than that," he deadpanned.

"Then you're a better man than I~."

"ADVENTURE!" Ayla roared as she raced out of the portal, I'm guessing she got permission.

Shepard took that time to jump to his feet, "I'M NOT ASLEEP DRILL SERGEANT! I'M ONLY LEADING MY ENEMIES INTO A FALse sense of... Security." he petered out awaking fully, I couldn't hold it in and started laughing. "uh, what? Oh yeah~, magic, gods, contracts... I'm starving." I passed him a plate of food.

"Eat up, we have a long talk ahead~, also I know it seems a bit soon for me to ask for a favor, but... can you keep the media away?" They followed my line of sight, to the dozens of reporters being held back by C-sec, a holographic do-not-pass sign, and the fact that Sky gave them a look that said 'Ask any question you like, but I will eat you after'.

"I'll, uh, handle that," Anderson got up from the table, patting Shepard on the shoulder, like a proud sympathetic father, "good luck son, you have a long talk ahead of you."

-/-

As Anderson handled the dredge known as modern-day journalism, I rest of my crew from consisting of Sereda, the dwarf noble and paladin of the Stone, which caused another spacequake, Natia, the dwarven rogue, with the skill to call out bullshit, Neria the elven sorcerer, with the knack of going big with her spells, and Astral, my surprised adopted dragon little sister, who loved being clean more than people.

we gave Shepard a simple rundown of his powers, what he should expect as a Paladin, and Ayla of course practically shoved her way into Shepard's group, Shepard was iffy at first, but gave us a test run, the citadel had training areas where he could test us properly. At that time Jak was able to escape Sky's playing coming out of the lake looking like a wet cat, I use prestidigitation to dry her off and gave her a shirt, and by that, I told her if she didn't put it on, I was going to dip her back in the lake. So now she was angry but in a big warm shirt.

I need to stop adopting every stray I come across.

Anderson did one hell of a job keeping the riff-raff away, but unfortunately bigger fish arrived, as the rest of the council and their entourage of spectres arrived at my picnic table.

Tevos coughed as stepped up, "Greeting my name is-"

"Tevos, Valern, and Sparatus, I know, I don't like you," I gave them a fake smile.

That seemed to push them off guard, "I'm not sure what you heard-"

"It's not what I heard Valern, it's what I saw! Sky," I pointed to the dragon, "tore through Shepard and his team like they were wet paper, and manhandled Anderson, your fellow councilor, and what did you do?" I asked rhetorically, "You sent, a lone, turian C-sec officer. What did you think was going to happen? Did you think poor Quinscus was just gonna talk me into being arrested? Maybe dig deep into his turian soul and gain the strength to overcome us? You sent a young man into an impossible situation, a situation so far above his job description, I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to sue you. He's meant to keep the peace, not fight dragons and interdimensional travelers," I ranted, that shit hit a nerve, I didn't send my guards into that sort of danger alone, they're usually in a group, with at least one robo-golem as muscle. "Your council has shown me nothing, you, less than nothing. There will be no sharing of technology or friendship until I find you worthy. Anderson!" I called out, and I placed my hand on his chest, "When danger reared its ugly face you did not hide, you did not cower, as a leader, you raced to handle the danger, for that, you have gained my respect, and my favor."

Do you wish to Bestow David Anderson with power?

Be warned, you can only do this once!

Cost: 800CP and 800MP

Gain: 450 CP, +15 levels, plus to all stats

I didn't want to open the can of worms that was magic for him when there was no one to train him.

Accepting. Anderson lit up like a Christmas tree, blinding everyone. As the light faded Anderson was no longer a man passed his prime, oh no, not by a long shot. The shirt he was wearing was torn apart revealing the body of a man who never skipped a day at the gym, he was 6 inches taller standing at an impressive 6'6.

"Whoa~." and with a voice that could melt steel, apparently. "What did you do?"

"I have the ability to bestow the worthy with great power. You're welcome," I teased.

Tevos actually reached out and touched his chest only to recoil, "it's real," she squeaked.

I laughed at her, "Of course it's real! Anderson is now a super soldier! No illness shall hold him, no poison shall drop him, his might will make weaker men tremble and women swoon," I was hamming it up, summoning a steel ingot I passed it to him. "Give it a little squeeze~."

Following my order, Anderson squeezed bending and molding the metal, much to everyone's shock, "well... okay then," he muttered, beginning to bend and twist the metal like it was clay. Letting it drop causing a loud clang that resonated throughout the presidium.

"Well... have fun with that~, I'll send you a message with all the cool things you can do later~. I got this 'area' to test out~," I waved goodbye, "Shepard! Let me clean up a bit and we'll go have some fun!" snapping my fingers the table with food and drinks vanished into my inventory, walking over to the gateway, with everyone in my group at this side of the portal, I made my golem into a messenger, telling anyone on the other side what was happening and that I would reopen the portal later, before shoving it into my inventory.

"Hold on! You can't just march into the Citadel and do whatever you want!" roared Sparatus.

"You did," I muttered. "mmmm, I feel like you're going to give me problems~, so in order to distract you, I'll give you something to fight each other over." taking a deep breath, "THE ASARI HAVE A SECRET PROTHEAN BEACON ON THESSIA!" I yelled at the top of my voice making sure the reporters could hear me, "THEY ARE DISGUISING IT AS A TEMPLE TO ONE OF THEIR GODS, ATHAME, IN THE CITY OF ARMALI! THAT'S WHY IT SEEMS LIKE THERE SO ADVANCE! THEY DON'T KNOW SHIT!" everyone was dead quiet, Tevos fell on her ass, her blue skin pale as a ghost. "You guys have fun with that~," my smirk may have been a little too devilish. The reporters exploded into questions and photographs, some just ran off, probably to their publishers or what the hell they use here. "So, Armax Arena~." I clapped getting Shepard's attention

-/-

Shepard POV

The phrase I was thinking of, was, 'political shitstorm'. Yeah~, that was the phrase. I felt like I was swimming through the air, nothing was real, the dragon women flying outside the car were figments of my imagination, and the holy pistol magnetized to my thigh that gave me a warm feeling was just me sleeping too close to a heater.

"You okay Shepard?" and then there's this guy. Nick Walters, who is this guy!?

"Yeah~, I'm good," it's still the same day. Too much shit has happened in one day. It felt like Ilos all over again. Just one fire after another. I looked over to a shell-shocked Garrus... touching his face again.

"This is so cool!" Ayla had her face plastered to the window and casually played with her new Omni tool.

My omni-tool went off, bring it up Anderson came into view, he looked good for a man in his mid-40s, "Sir. How's the meeting?"

"The Asari have locked down Thessia. Tevos is locked up in her office. Valern, confirm that the Prothean is indeed in Thessia, and Sparatus, is cursing up a storm, my new translator is picking up every word. Shepard, I don't think I have to tell you this, but keep Nick close, not just because he has crazy other-dimensional powers, but because the Asari, as a whole, might try and kill him."

"Understood Sir... anything else?" I... needed something, there are too many directions.

"Continue your investigation, people are still going missing and you might be their best hope. Good luck, Anderson out." My screen vanished, and across from me Nick was just looking out the window with a devil-may-care attitude like he didn't just destabilize the entire Galaxy.

"Nick?"

"Yeah bub?" he asked, looking at me, and stopping Garrus from touching his face.

"How did-"

"I know?" he cut me off, "You just entered the world of magic, so things are a bit jarring, magic can do just about anything, I have the ability to gain information, just by looking at somebody or thing, at first this power wasn't very useful, it told me the plant I was looking at was green and needed water, but as I got better control of my magic and gained intelligence, I gained more and more information, now if I really focused, if I read you with my full power and your mind wasn't protected, I could read your most guarded secrets." he leaned back in his chair, "I don't though, not unless you're my enemy. Peeking into people's minds is a serious violation of their privacy, and stuff like that, it marks you in a way you don't like. Magic tends to reflect what you look like on the inside. Sure, some hide it, but you can tell, especially you."

"Me?"

"You're a paladin to a decent god, some would even say good. That will give you insight if people are lying to you. I am a virgin; I can't talk to a woman to save my life."

Something in my gut... moved, something was wrong, it was like that time during the blitz when I was able to avoid an ambush. "You're lying."

He smirked, "How are you so sure? You don't know me, you met me today. How can you possibly know that?"

"I... had a gut instinct, that what you just said was a lie."

Nick nodded, "And you'd be correct, learn to trust that instinct, it's your magic reaching into the ether, connecting the energy of the universe, and trying to help you determine the truth. The fact that you're a career soldier who had years of combat and danger experience probably makes it easier to trust your gut, add the fact that the Maker is in your corner, it will probably feel like you see into the future."

I stared at him for a long time, "Why did you out the Asari like that?" I had to ask.

"Other than the distraction?" I nodded, "Shepard, from what I understand you are at war with ancient evil eldritch robot abominations, correct?" I nodded again, "And you gain the information about their existence from a beacon, correct?" one more nod. "Do you believe that the beacon you used was the only one? I find that hard to believe, no~, what's more likely is that the Asari knew about the monsters in the dark, and waited."

"For what!? To die horribly!?" Who would do that if they knew of the dangers, why wouldn't they do anything!?

"To look like heroes~," he sighed leaning against his chair.

"Heroes?" That's insane.

"mmm~, the monster comes and attacks the land, the villagers beg for a savior, the Asari arrive just in time to save them with a never-before-seen weapon, killing the monster, the Asari become heroes, worshipped and praised. For all you know Shepard, the Asari already have a way to fight the reapers. the Asari can live up to a Millennium, plenty of time for them to build something in secret, to move money and supplies quietly, and if anyone starts asking questions, well~, they don't even have to kill them, just gaslight them until they die of old age, and then continue on like nothing even happened." I wish that didn't sound so possible. "With any luck, you might find the weapon to kill the monster, and if nothing else, prove that the monster is real."

"Doesn't sound like much of a consolation prize~," I groaned.

"Maybe, but now everyone will be aware of the danger and can start helping. Anderson told me that humanity has its own Beacon, have you checked for evidence of the reapers? Maybe random weapon schematics that make no sense, like they're too big or seem to just be placed somewhere in the data that made no rhyme or reason," he shrugged, "I kind of guess that races of the galaxy wanted to take their time studying and learning what the Protheans left behind but with the Asari proven hypocrites, now is probably your best time to dig deep into the information the beacon has."

"You seem to know a bit about politics," Garrus pointed out.

He shrugged, "I'm a Barron, the lowest form of nobility, I hate it, I just wanted a castle, man~, then suddenly a few hundred people fall into my lap and my morality took command, one thing led to another and suddenly there were thousands of them!" he groaned.

"He did a real good job," Ayla added, "you should visit!" she passed me her magic hand phone showing off photos of what seemed like a beautiful little village on the side of a mountain, "Less than a year ago it was a tiny little village, now it's the center of Ferelden educational system!" I swiped to the next picture showing the village growing rather rapidly into a city, "he even made a magical school... that kinda teaches everything, plus magic." The next few pictures were of a school that you would only find in a fantasy vid. There were kids doing magic, archery, sword practice, cooking, and so on.

"Seems like a fun place," Garrus complemented, it really did, I liked the idea of just living off the grid... for like a week before I lose my mind. Swiping to the left, a picture flashed on the screen I probably shouldn't have seen.

"wh-" Ayla's hand flashed over the screen.

"Shepard..." her eyes screamed murder, my stomach was churning, "can I have this back?" Her voice was sweet, but the threat was there.

"y-yeah."

"And Shepard... you saw nothing," I would disagree, I saw a lot more of Nick than I ever wanted to. That picture better have come with consent or I'm going to have to arrest her.

"I... saw nothing," but I shouldn't say anything as I'm currently in a flying box.

"Great! So, when are we getting to this Silversun strip?" she shoved her phone back into her pocket avoiding eye contact. At least I know now that I don't have to be celibate.

"We should be there soon, according to Anderson his apartment should be close to the presidium," we should have been there by now. The ship suddenly took a turn to the left... heading away from our destination and the other group. That can't be good.

"Everything okay Shepard? Looking a bit confused." Nick asked.

"Something is wrong, we've changed directions. Garrus?" I looked over to my right-hand man as he tapped away at his Omni-tool.

"Someone hijacked the car's navigation system, we're heading toward Tayseri ward."

"Tayseri? Isn't that place under construction after Sovereign fell on it?" my gut was churning again.

"Yeah, nothing but construction workers and blackouts as far as you can see," his face looked grim.

"Oh~, an ambush~!" At least Nick was having a good time. "I was worried the arena, wouldn't bring our skills to the forefront, but now~," the shorts he was wearing began climbing up his body creating a suit of glowing armor.

"Whoa~."

"Battle shorts~, never leave home without them," he joked.

"I'm guessing this wasn't part of the trip?" Ayla sighed, as her swimwear also morphed into shiny golden armor, and took out a rather large-looking mace. "Should I call the others?"

"Send a message, we're probably going to be a little late and should start having fun without us," Nick shrugged.

"You guys seem rather relaxed?" Garrus pointed out.

"Yeah, so are you." huh, I guess I am. I've done this too often.

The car began slowing down and landed in a dark large open area with a single heavily armed Asari standing out in the street.

"I don't like this Shepard, no cover, no light, a single Asari in the middle of the street, this is all kinds of bad," Garrus huffed taking out his sniper.

"8 assassins, two behind her, 4 in the third building to the left, and two behind us in the second building to the right," Nick said, looking around the street.

"What is your specialty?"

"Power, speed, cooking." he smirked

"Of course, do you have any gun experience?" I asked, hoping for a miracle.

"none~, but don't worry, I can handle myself," he smirked, I had to believe him as I turned to Ayla.

"I'm heavy support, healing, shields, and buffs!" she smirked.

Okay, I don't know what that meant but it sounds better than cooking, "Do either of you have a gun?"

"n-," Nick started before freezing and gasping, "I do! I do have a gun!" Alright, at this point I'll take anything. He then proceeded to summon something the size of a rocket launcher!

"The hell is that thing!? Garrus asked.

"Ya like it? It's a Gauss rifle! It uses magnetic induction to propel a projectile at incredible and devastating speed. It fires a 2mm ferromagnetic bullet that will probably kill anything it's pointed at." He was way too excited.

"How many bullets do you have?" I asked, he gave me a strange look before unloading the gun's strange magazine and created a dozen extra cartridges.

"As many as I need Shepard," that was a dangerous-looking smirk, if I didn't know better, I would have thought he was a krogan poorly disguised as a human.

"Come on out! The car's engine isn't going to start up anytime soon!" the Asari ordered.

"Who is that?" I asked.

"Teler Jayma, spectre, age 487, she likes Butt play." too much info!

"Nick... you're a weird man," Garrus muttered. "So, a spectre. Any chance you can just talk our way out of this?" Garrus asked me.

"Probably not," I sighed.

"I'll remove the two at our back as quietly as possible," Nick nodded creating an illusion of himself. "I'll then circle and kill everyone in the buildings."

"Wait for my signal, I wanna see if I can talk us out of it first," I ordered, he nodded and vanished leaving only his clone behind.

Opening the car, we were met with the cockiest Asari matron I have ever seen.

"I am Commander Shepard, council spectre! What is the meaning of this!?" I roared, putting on my game face as I led my team out of the car.

"Shepard? Heard you were dead," she huffed.

"I got better, what do you want?"

"Teler Jayma, also a council spectre, I've been ordered to bring that man in for questioning," she drawled.

"I got no such order, and I was next to the guy. So don't try that shit with me."

"Councilor Tevos-"

"Is under inspection, after the fact that the Asari kept a Prothean beacon hidden came to light! She can't order anything from us," I hissed. "Leave Teler, and take your backup dancers with you." Her eye twitched as I pointed out her backup.

"That man is responsible for destabilizing council space and throwing the Asari Republic into turmoil."

"The Asari government did that on its own when it decided not to play by its own rules! It was the Asari who demanded for us to share any Prothean data we came across, and now that they have been caught red-handed their trying to blame anyone but themselves! Teler... you've done nothing wrong; it's our job to uphold the laws that the council created, and the Asari Republic has broken those laws. It must be willing to accept its punishment as any other council race. My friend here may have spilled out the truth, but it was meant to be said, sooner or later the truth would have come out."

"Thessia is going crazy," she answered with a grim tone, "powerful political figures are running, people are rioting and protesting, that man caused a lot of death and mayhem when he spilled his guts out like that. He needs to answer for his stupid actions."

"Not to you. His actions were foolhardy, I don't doubt that, but necessary! How long has the Asari government kept this under wraps? How many people has it killed to keep its secret? I'm not going to start sacrificing people for its failure, and neither should you. Leave Teler. Go home," I ordered. I tapped into my magic as her soul came into view, it looked pained, it twisted and raved. I don't know how, but I can feel that she's been personally affected by the republic's lies.

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.

.

"I'm sorry." a gunshot pierced the silence, "What?" The bullet aimed at Nick's forehead did no damage.

"Holy Rebound! Blind! Armaments! Haste!" Ayla roared, unleashing a blinding light, but the light didn't affect me at all. As I was covered in a strange barrier everything seemed to come to a crawl, Ayla didn't hesitate and rushed forward practically teleporting before Teler with her mace mid swing striking her in the chest rag dolling her through the air and into one of her cloaked bodyguards. I'm unsure if that blow killed her but the sickening crunch didn't give that idea much hope, at the very least she wasn't going to get up any time soon.

Ayla, not wanting to let her momentum fade, dashed forward reaching the other cloaked guard in record time, using her mace to smash the Asari's head into the metal wall. Unlike Teler, I can guarantee that Asari was dead, as her brains and blood decorated the wall.

"Holy shit," I muttered, turning my gun to the remaining guards only to spot Nick already finishing off the 4 in the building, his fists covered in blood. I couldn't see him very well but from what I saw, he looked like a serial killer from a bad horror vid, simply looking out the window from the third floor with glowing blue eyes.

As quick as it started the battle was over, the dark street was cloaked in silence yet again.

"Shepard," Garrus's soft voice tried to break the oppressive silence, "what the hell was that?"

"Shepard! We have two live ones over here!" Ayla called out, dragging Teler, who had two broken legs and one arm, by her unbroken arm and the other unconscious Asari by the foot. "Should we bring them in?"

I nodded, "yeah, let me make some calls."

It's still the same day.

-/-

"My goodness ladies and Gentlemen! That horn woman just ripped that krogan Battle master in two!" the announcer yelled.

At the moment I was watching Nick's team fight solo and as a team. I could see the years of friendship and teamwork, not a word was said as they worked together killing every hologram that the Armax Arena had. Their strength, speed, and powers, flipped the battlefield on its head. A large explosion rocked the arena.

"WHAT KIND OF GRENADE WAS THAT!? ARE THESE NEW COMERS SECRET WEAPON TESTERS!?" the announcer roared causing the crowd to go crazy. "WILD~!"

"they're good," Miranda commented, to my left.

"Is that approval in your voice?" I teased.

"I call it as I see it. They can be useful on our mission."

"And the illusive man? I have no doubt he would chomp at the chance at getting magic."

"No doubt. Magic could be the key to giving humanity an edge, you've seen Anderson. He looked 20 years younger and could bench-press a mountain," she smirked. He also reported that he was finding difficult concepts easier to learn and remembering things that he thought unimportant, like his high school Spanish lessons, which he used to a degree that he started speaking to Ambassador Dominic Osoba in his native Spanish without noticing. Whatever Nick did to enhance Anderson to the point where the alliance had to give him a full workup. Nick wasn't joking about that superhuman comment, Anderson was the thing every military leader had wet dreams about.

"You think Nick will give Cerberus the key to magic?" I would comment that we would sooner see pigs fly... but a dragon woman just ripped the head of a krogan, so, there's that.

"We may not need him, now that we know that magic exists, we could work to obtain it."

"I would say it was a bad idea but that won't stop you, just remember... you now know you will be judged in the end," the noise around us seems to lower.

"And you don't think a human god would be happy to see humanity grow?" she hissed.

I looked her in the eyes, "At what cost?" my voice was cold, and the air around us seemed to chill, "The bones of the innocent are not a good material for humanity's foundation."

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"AND THERE WE HAVE IT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! WITH ANOTHER TOP SCORE! TEAM... ass, really~, IS UNBEATABLE!" The announcer called the end of the match and our conversation. Standing I walked over to the team's entrance and exit, I was next leading Nick's group... I also had to keep my high score.

-/-

"I have to admit Shepard, she is a beauty~." Nick whistled looking over at the Normandy SR-2. She was bigger, faster, and stronger than her predecessor. Something I take great pride in; I think only Joker loves her more than me.

"Thanks."

"But, uh... is it okay to fly with those colors?" and he pointed to the one thing I hated more than anything, EDI? I can live with that, She and Joker have this comedy lover's skit going on, which gave me a good laugh, but the colors!? The hell!? Isn't Cerberus supposed to be some sort of secret terrorist group? Why the hell are they blasting their colors in everyone's face!?

"I've been trying to get a color change," I muttered, no one wanted to touch her, thinking they might be arrested for working for a terrorist group.

"Want me to change it?"

"And here I thought I was supposed to be the miracle worker~. I would appreciate it."

Nick proceeded to touch the ship changing the color scheme to the alliance's blue, black, and white. It almost brought a tear to my eyes, she was finally perfect~, all I had to do was get her back into alliance hands.

Walking into the ship all the Cerberus symbols were removed, "SHEPARD! The Normandy lit up like- who the hell are you?" Jeff asked, "Hey~," he called out to the rest of Nick's crew.

"Should you really be trying to flirt with your wife not 2 steps away?" I teased.

"She's not my WIFE!" he roared.

"Joker, this is my ship, and you won't allow me to touch any of her buttons~."

"I've seen you drive a mako, I am 100% positive that if I gave you control of the Normandy for even a second you would fly us into a black hole or a star or something. I'm saving all our lives!"

"Can I press any of the buttons?" Nick asked, reaching for a button, only for Jeff to slap away his hand.

"Don't touch anything! I don't know who the hell you are?" Jeff huffed.

"Right! Sorry! My name is Nick Walters! Healer, mage, Lover of the ladies~."

Jeff just gave Nick a deadpan look, "So... are we just recruiting crazy people now?" he asked me.

"YOU DARE QUESTION MY MAGIC!?" Nick... then placed his hand on Jeff's head.

"What the hell-" his skeleton then lit up giving me a front-row seat to watch Jeff become Skeletor for a second, "-was that?" he sighed out as if Nick drained his annoyance.

"Let this be a lesson, Joker, when someone says they have magic powers, you shouldn't just dismiss them~," Nick teased before he grabbed Jeff and tossed him to his feet.

"FUCK!?" He screamed as he landed on his feet... and stayed on his feet. That... shouldn't be possible, his Vrolik syndrome, wouldn't allow it. He slowly stood to his full height, probably for the first time in his life.

.

.

.

"What?" His whisper was so quiet I thought I imagined it.

"Have you ever felt the wind through your hair Jeff~? The freedom of running? There are no chains on you~. Run boy, run~." Jeff looked like a startled deer not knowing what to do, looking around for the predator, he looked so lost, so scared, so confused, never have I ever seen Joker anything but cocky and confident, to see him like this. "RUN!" Nick yelled at the top of his voice, causing him to blitz down the neck of the ship, slamming into people, he fell twice but was back on his feet faster than I have ever been, it wasn't until he slammed into the elevator that I got to see his face, he was crying, fat tears ran down his face. He didn't know what was happening, all he knew was that he just ran for the first time in his life. As the elevator closed, he didn't say anything, just looked at me.

Everyone was quiet, what can one say after watching a real-life miracle?

"What... what did you do?" I muttered. I... know magic is real, I've seen a god, I've felt a god, but this. Things are beginning to finally sink in.

"What are you talking about? I cured his Vrolik syndrome," He answered like I was an idiot.

"I..." I couldn't look away from him, "EDI?"

"... Yes commander?" the ship's AI answered.

"Where's Joker?"

"He is talking to Dr. Chakwas in the med lab." There's going to be a lot of ugly crying, and confused questioning.

"Ah~, you must be Miss Moreau," Nick greeted giving a small bow. How can he be so nonchalant about this!?

"I... am EDI. Which stands for Enhanced Defense Intelligence. I am not married to Lt. Moreau," she answered.

"So~, can anyone touch your buttons then~?" he teased reaching for the glowing buttons, only to disappear before he got any closer.

"You don't have permission to touch the Normandy's controls," she stated, if I didn't know better, I would have called that a hiss.

"Ah~, I'm sorry Ms. Moreau~, it won't happen again," he teased.

"See that it doesn't," she vanished. Whoa~?

"Miranda said I need to be debriefed. Are you doing that? Cause she looks bitchy." he muttered walking down the ship's neck ignoring the crew's wide-eyed looks.

It's 6 in the afternoon.

Fuck today.

-/-

A/N: well, here I go~. First chapter, probably could have done better, but I just wanted to get started.

Yes, there was a bit of a time skip, probably going to use that for fun flashbacks, I also wanted to know what Nick's combat prowess looks like through someone else's POV. It wasn't until I did that, I realized that Nick is flipping terrifying. Nick is all about speed and power, get in close and use his full power to kill someone with his fists, before vanishing and doing the same thing to some else.

This is the beginning of this story, so if you have any suggestion, know would be the best time to say them, cause if you're reading this 6 chapters later there' very little I can do.

As always, I have a DeviantArt page link in bio and that's for reading.