Kim Pine vs. The L Word
"Listen… Anything you heard about me is complete fiction. Young Neil and that crazy succubus guy just.. made it all up. 'Nuff said."
Kim was leaning over the table glaring at Scott Pilgrim and Ramona Flowers that were sitting across from her. The diner had gotten a bit quieter around them from the intensity that the redhead had displayed, and the food trays she'd managed to bend in her anger.
"Dude.. I was literally there," Ramona said, raising an eyebrow. "You did kiss Roxie–"
With a groan, Kim slouched back in the booth. Stephen Stills beside her pat her on the shoulder and nodded his head in solidarity.
"It's alright Kim, I feel ya'. After all, everyone seems to have weird ideas about me and Knives after our huge success story," he said, before tossing some fries into his mouth and speaking through his chewing. "Isht the life."
"Is it really that bad that like.. Your friends want you to be happy?" Scott offered a smile, only to wince when he received a scowl from Kim in return and hiding his face in Ramona's jacket.
Ramona sighed and took a drink of her shake, brushing some of her red locks back over her ear before looking the redhead up and down a bit.
"Just because there weren't any sparks there, doesn't mean it's giving up time. And besides, even if you want to fight the lesbo rumors.. Is there any guy you're looking into?"
"Oo, oo, maybe Lucas?" Scott sat back up and looked excited, palming his hand. "He's been eyeballing you and your no-nonsense attitude for a while, right?"
"Eh…" Kim laid her head on her arm, staring towards the nearby frosted-over window. "Didn't feel anything there either."
"Even with his muscles, and good looks?" Scott of all people said this.
"Nope."
"Or his butt?" Stephen this time.
"Nada."
Everyone then looked towards Ramona, who sipped at her milkshake for a few good long seconds before rolling her eyes and putting her cup down.
"What? He's changed for the better, sure. But I've got nothing to say about the guy anymore." Her arm wrapped around Scott's with a bit of aggression, a slight blush crossing her face as she looked away from the group.
"I hate that this spark crap is real," Kim muttered. "And that you all escaped your own love lives to annoy me about it."
Scott put a finger to his chin in thought. "You know, we haven't really seen what Goose and Julie have been up to, did they have the spark thingy too?"
"Well, they kinda went off to do their own thing, so who knows really," Ramona said, shrugging. "Maybe their evil larping is enough. Prooobably nothing to worry about at least."
"Yeah, we need to focus on Kim!" Scott slapped the table and pointed at his ex, a wide grin on his face. "Before the holidays come up, we'll totally get Kim that spark! Am I right guys?"
There was silence for a few moments, before Scott sat back in defeat and Ramona consoled him with head pats. Kim groaned and slid out of the booth, starting to stomp away. Stephen nearly choked trying to swallow the food in his mouth quickly as he tried to wave after her.
"H-Hey, you ordered these fries, aren't you gonna pay?"
"You're the bigshot now, you got it," Kim called over her shoulder before leaving the diner, the bell above it jingling hard at her swift exit.
The outside world was a desolate, snowy wasteland– So it was just another average day in Toronto.
Kim lowered her head a bit into her scarf, slipping her hands into her jacket pockets and heading to.. Well, nowhere in particular. She just felt like she needed to escape, like she was being cornered back in the diner. Even if her friends had good intentions, it was all just an unnecessary nuisance.
I just wanna play in a stupid band, work a stupid job, and then go to sleep and do it all over again, forever and ever, Kim thought bitterly. Is it that difficult for people?!
Most people knew by now that Kim wasn't a misunderstood introvert or a misanthrope with a deeper condition– No, she was just Kim Pine, and she hated everyone pretty much.
It didn't help that the one time she opened up and decided to try liking someone who wasn't a manipulative asshole, he ended up leaving her behind. Now Scott Pilgrim got everything he ever could have wanted, and all he had to do was kick some ass to get it.
If only I gave a shit.
She gave herself a pitiful huff under her breath at the humor of it all, before wincing at the oncoming wind. Snow was blowing around like crazy, and it was getting harder and harder to even see where she was going.
"Ugh.. Why do I still live here..?"
Kim held up a a hand, starting to lean forward as she trudged through the snow piling up on the sidewalk. It was getting so out of hand that she was having to lift her entire leg to take a step, and eventually, she could only shuffle forward through the waist-deep snow to continue on.
"What's.. Up with… this… Gah–"
The wind blew Kim to the side, and she found herself suddenly pushed into a doorway, stumbling and falling to the floor. Snow piled in after her, and someone rushed past with chittering teeth, doign their best to shut the door against the cold wind.
"No no no..! I though it would hold..!"
As Kim pulled herself up off the floor and brushed the snow from herself, she looked around the unfamiliar little shop, before settling her eyes on the guy who stood at the door, sighing in relief as he managed to keep the door from opening again.
"...Really? Goose guy?"
Gideon– Or, well, Gordon Goose, pushed up on his glasses and looked at Kim with a serious expression.
"..I see our little hideout here has been found out, how did you know? Did Scott sniff it out?"
Kim blinked at the guy, wondering if she should just push past him and take a chance with the storm outside.. But it seemed like things were only getting worse out there, and she could've sworn the snow was piling up well past the window now.
"No, you're just an idiot," she told him.
"Hilarious," Gordon said as he walked over to a nearby door and rapped his knuckles on it. After a few moments, it opened up wide as Julie Powers glared at her bespectacled boyfriend.
"What the f**k did I say about– Oh, Kim. Great, this s**t wasn't hard enough," Julie said, rolling her eyes.
"I really thought the weather machine would help keep people away from this place, but I guess that's too much to ask." Gordon sighed and rubbed his temple.
"Weather machine? Dude…" Kim processed it all, how the closer she got to this spot, the more insane the snowfall became outside. "Alright.. I'm out of here."
She turned to head to the door, but Gordon and Julie quickly ran over to block her, nearly tripping over each other, and pointed at her with patented evil grins (No, really, they patented them, and they will destroy anyone who infringes on them.)
"Not so fast! As one of Pilgrim's lackeys, there's no way that we would ever let you–"
The door suddenly blasted open behind them, sending in an avalanche of snow that covered the evil couple and forced Kim to stumble back several steps. Atop the snow, came a particular girl who slid and stumbled, flailing her arms.
"Help–!"
Kim instinctively reached out and caught the girl to stop her from falling, but just barely. With an annoyed look on her face, Kim peered over her at the forms of Gordon and Julie digging themselves out of the snow.
"Welcome to hell, we'll need that guy over there to turn off his thing if we want.. To.."
Just as Kim looked down at the girl, she looked up at her. Instantly, she realized that it was someone else she knew, and the two blushed slightly in surprise.
"Kim! Wow, what a coincidence," Knives said with a big grin. "Stephen told me to come cheer you up, but then a blizzard started outside."
"Right… I don't need that," Kim deflected, lightly pushing the girl away and looking towards the nearby wall awkwardly. "Just tell him to give me those new hi-hats sooner rather than later."
Knives Chau took a step back and tilted her head a bit up at Kim, noticing how tense she was now, then she looked back over her shoulder at the two goons that were shivering and clinging to each other now.
"F-**k… F**k s*-*t c-c-c**t…!"
Julie was cursing through her chattering teeth while Gordon led her away from the snow pile that had now completely blocked the doorway.
"Always finding ways to foil our plans.. One day we'll be back on top, baby, just you wait," he reassured her as he led her into the other room. When the door closed, Knives turned to Kim expectantly.
"...What's going on?"
"Dude… I don't even care," Kim said with a sigh, looking at the massive problem blocking their way out now. Then she called out loudly for the other two to hear, "Hey, how long til your machine turning off lets all this melt?"
There was no response. Kim grumbled and looked around the room she was in. It looked like it used to be a small antique shop or similar. A place she'd probably passed up for years on end and just never gave any care to. Looking at it now, maybe it would've been a nice place to escape people for a while, before Mr. Gideon Goose seemingly bought it out for his own purposes.
"Is there no heater in this place?" Knives shivered and was rubbing her arms as she walked around the room, surprisingly bright-eyed for what to Kim was just a dusty old shop.
"Doubt it. It took most of our hangout spots years to give a crap about getting one. Just Toronto things," Kim commented as she headed over to a nearby couch and dusted it off a bit before sitting down in a puff of dust.
Coughing and waving the cloud away, Kim wanted nothing more than to just stare at the ceiling and let this all pass.. But of course, being stuck with one of the most energized people she knew wasn't going to allow that, and soon enough, Knives was rushing over to her with some kind of statue in her hand.
"Wow, isn't this cool? I wonder if it's authentic!"
She held it out to Kim, and the redhead took it. It was a dragon statue, and all it took was looking on the underside to see a sticker that said, 'Made in Germany', for her to know it was not, indeed, authentic.
"Yep, looks pretty cool," she said without care, handing it back.
Knives giddily sat on the couch as well, causing another storm of dust that left them both coughing for a little bit.. But then, everything sort of.. Chilled out, surprisingly.
"Hey… Are you really okay?" Knives looked over at Kim with a bit of worry, clutching at the hems of her jacket as if nervous to ask. "We're friends, and we share an ex, so we're basically like… sisters!"
"Don't.. Put it that way," Kim insisted quickly, holding up her hands a bit. "I'm fine, everyone just needs to.. Back up a bit."
Kim rested her head on her hand and looked the other way. Knives took a few moments to think before she continued to press the matter.
"I heard what everyone's saying about you, but.. It's not a bad thing, right? I mean, what about Wallace? Or Todd? Being gay is like.. Totally in."
Rubbing her eyes, Kim wasn't sure if this line of questioning or the dust was upsetting her more. Everyone was so.. Annoying now. Couldn't they just understand that she wanted to drop it?
It was all because of that stupid sequel that Young Neil and Matthew Patel put out last week. 'Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Musical TAKES OFF!' was such a hit, and was so accurate to the things that had happened last year, that Kim very quickly found herself being looked at differently. She didn't care, people could do whatever the hell they wanted, but.. At the same time, Kim hated the attention.
I'm not some freak, I'm allowed to try things, she thought bitterly. Every day she regretted that shared moment with Ramona and Roxie… And yet..
Kim never did regret the kiss.
There wasn't a spark, there wasn't anything deeper there for them to pull from, but at the same time it felt.. Strangely right. A battle-hungry evil ex wasn't her style, but it still felt like the first time she'd been able to express herself since Scott left her all that time ago.
Something squeezed her free hand, and Kim looked down at her lap to see Knives gently grabbing it. The girl smiled at her.
"Sorry… I bet you think I'm annoying–"
Kim pulled her hand away so suddenly that it startled the girl, and even startled herself a bit. Wide-eyed, Kim lowered her hand and opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Knives looked straight ahead and stood up,
"Okay.. I think I'll go find a warm corner somewhere," the girl said with a forced smile for a moment, before turning to walk away.
Kim looked up at Knives, and felt a pang hit her heart. She was receding away, and someone was leaving her again. Why was she always like this? Why? Why?
"Knives–"
It was like a flash of inspiration hit all at once. When Kim reached out to make contact, something that she would almost never do, something bright was there to greet her. As her hand grabbed Knives' own and stopped the girl in her tracks, their eyes met, and..
Sparks. Glittering lights flashed across their vision faintly, just barely perceptible to the two girls. It wasn't a brilliant display like others had described, and yet, it was more than enough.
"Um… Did you see that?" Knives poked at the air with her other hand, confused about the strange sparkles that had appeared.
"Yeah…" Kim managed a smile, and stood up, hand still grasping hers. "H-Hey, it's way too cold in her. We should.. Share body heat. Ah, damn, that's such a weird way to put it."
With a groan, Kim rolled her eyes and scratched the back of her head, wondering just how stupid she made herself look, but was surprised when Knives giggled and gave her hand a light squeeze.
"Okay."
"Okay?" Kim blinked at her. Knives nodded.
"Yeah. We'll probably be stuck here for like.. At least an hour." She shrugged.
Kim glanced towards the unrelenting snow pile at the entrance and figured that was probably an understatement, but couldn't help but think that it was maybe a good understatement.
"For sure.."
With that, Kim moved a bit closer, and the two girls found an admittedly not-very-cozy corner to sit in together. After a few minutes of simply being in each others presence, they had scooted closer side by side, and eventually, Knives nestled her head up against Kim, prompting the redhead to put an arm around her.
Kim was practically a statue during the whole endeavor. This sort of thing wasn't her style after all, but then again, was impulsively kissing Roxie her style either?
"Hey, Kim.. Do you think you could teach me how to be awesome at the drums sometime?"
Kim huffed. "If you learn it in like five minutes, I think I'd have to kill you, man."
Knives chuckled, and Kim managed to work up the nerve to hold her even closer, closing her eyes and enjoying the warmth and comfort–
"ALRIGHT! I've managed to call at least three different people out who will reverse the weather machine to melt the snow and–"
Gordon had busted the door open to proclaim his actions, but looked around in confusion when he didn't immediately see anyone else around.
"What.. Did they–"
Then he noticed the two figures huddled in the corner and lifted his glasses, squinting his eyes to see if his eyes were deceiving him.
"Hey Julie, you gotta see this babe," he said in a loud whisper.
Kim looked at the two as they stared over at them, and oddly felt her body relax a bit, her free arm lifting up to give them a well-deserved middle finger.
"F**k off.. I'll do whatever I want," Kim proclaimed.
..And with that, Kim Pine felt just a little bit more in control of her life.
End?
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