"I should go." I turned my stool away from her as her hands slipped off of my thighs. I signaled to the bartender to close me out.
"Em, I know it has been a long time and I don't deserve forgiveness, but I…" She tried to turn my stool around again.
"Stop." I turned to her and stood up putting the stool between us. "I can't hear this right now, Melissa." The air began to feel thin. I felt like I was no longer in the bar at that moment, but at the hotel hallway where my world imploded 2 years ago.
*Flash*
"I can't hear this right now, Melissa." Tears fell down my face freely. I couldn't even turn to look at her. I felt like someone had taken all the air from room. Where did they take the air? Why cannot I not breath?
"Em, please. Don't leave I know this looks bad." Melissa grabbed the back of my shirt to stop me from going any further.
"Bad? I found you in bed with him." I yelled as I turned ripping her hand from the back of my shirt. As I turned, I noticed her wrapped in bed sheets. Sheets that I had just caught her in with him. The same sheets that she and I had just made love in. Not just a few hours ago. Did she even ask the hotel to change them out? I felt ill and turned my face away.
"Em, you don't understand..." I could see from the corner of my eye her adjusted the sheets wrapped around herself. Even turned away from her I could see she had tears in her eyes, but at the moment I couldn't see pass the sheet and what that sheet meant.
"Melissa, I don't need to understand a damn thing. You told me you would never hurt me, that you loved me, and not a week into our honeymoon. You…" My voice cracked and I look up trying not to cry. I couldn't stop crying if I started now.
"You sleep with someone else on our honeymoon. I knew we jumped into this too fast. I knew you had issues with being gay. I knew you wanted to wait to tell people. I was willing to wait for you, Melissa. I was willing to be your secret for as long as you needed it. I knew it would hurt., but I didn't think you would ever hurt me like this. I looked her in the eyes. "I think I understand perfectly." I turned and began to walk away from her. Away from my wife.
*Flash*
"Emily" Melissa stood up to walk closer to me.
"I have to be up early for work tomorrow I should get to bed. Good night, Melissa." This time I was walking away from my ex-wife.