It had been months. Months since you were ripped from your home, from your family and friends. Your life, taken from you at the whim of a deranged man, captain turned traitor. You truly held no value to him, your life, a mere distraction for him to play with, to manipulate and dictate to his whims if and when they should strike. He had brought you to hueco mundo with him and his loyal pets, left you forgotten in your room, your prison, save for the three visits a day you were subjected to by one of his henchmen, Ulquiorra.

You had long given up hope for rescue. Soul society seemed to have abandoned you to Aizen. There was no attempt of rescue. Either they presumed you dead or deemed you unimportant enough to abandon to whatever he had planned. You still weren't sure what he was planning with you, you had no notable skills that he himself did not possess, had no abilities he couldn't make redundant with his own suffocating power. You served only as an amusement, as a testament that he had complete control over your life.

You thought you had no tears left to cry. Sat alone with only your thoughts as company, you stared out your window, overlooking the barren wasteland that surrounded your prison. An endless stretch of inhabitable land, as white and as lifeless as your eyes had become, dimming more each day, loosing yourself completely in this place where life came to die. Where death prevailed and grew, swallowing the land up with decay and hatred.

You had grieved your loss. The loss of your home, the loss of your life, the loss of yourself. Forgotten to waste away, become as empty and Desolate as the world you were trapped in. The hot streaks of tears slowly trickling down your face as you observed the landscape, a burning reminder of the last of your humanity, reminding you it was still there. While you were breathing, there was hope. Hope you had thought you had forsaken, like soul society had forsaken you. You didn't even know if you had a home to hope for. If there was a place for you back there anymore.

You hugged your knees close to your chest, seeking comfort from the sudden chill in your room. Void of all colour, no decoration to distracts from the bleak, washed out walls. No home comforts to immerse yourself in, to remind you of your humanity. It was perfectly constructed to chip away at your soul, beat you down to the shell of the person you once were, so full of life, of burning passion. Some days it felt more like a tomb, than a prison. The walls closing in on you, trapping you in their depths, your final resting place.

It's why you turned to the sky for comfort this evening, open, never ending. You could almost close your eyes and envision you were back home, under the rolling skies, filled with clouds and stars, full of freedom, potential. Another salty tear leaked from behind your closed eyes, tickling its way over your cheek, falling onto the white garb you've been forced to wear, stripping you of your identity. Just another number under Aizens rule.

You turn at the sound of your door opening and closing, having no shame in your emotions making themselves known by the wetness on your face. Ulquiorra almost floated with the graceful way he walked, perfect posture, even when holding a tray of your final meal for the day. You had long since lost the hatred in your eyes when you looked at him. The fight in you almost extinguished. You had learned quick there was no point in fighting. You couldn't win, would never win. Ulquiorra was too strong, too mindlessly obedient to Aizen. He would no hesitate to kill you at the snap of his lords fingers.

"Dinner" Ulquiorra unnecessarily informed you when you didn't immediately get up from your place at the window to eat. Unnecessary because you were only joined by another when it was to deliver your small meal, enough to keep you alive. There would be no other reason for his presence in your room, unless it were to kill you. Honestly, you had wished for that more than once. Death was preferable to this hell you were trapped in. You met his green eyes briefly, almost as empty as your own before turning back to your view.

You heard him set down the tray, the slight clinking of Priceline knocking together. You awaited the sound of the door closing, signifying your guards exit. He never lingered, never had a conversation with you unless it was to pass on word from Aizen. Ulquiorra was the embodiment of cold, dispassionate, empty. He seemed to be completely void of emotion, of feelings, of any thought that wasn't his own. You felt his presence next to you, a strange deviant from the usual routine.

"Why do you cry woman?" He asked in his soft monotone voice. It wasn't mocking or cruel, simply curious. You turn to look at him, confused yourself. He had never asked you a personal question before. Any question really. You sucked in a sharp breath through your teeth as his hand rose to follow the wet streak down your face, tracing over reddened line. You hated yourself for leaning into the touch, the first human (well... as close as you would get) contact since you had arrived here so many months ago. Touch that wasn't for the purpose of inflicting pain, of beating you so close to death that you prayed for it's sweet relief. "What purpose does it have?"

"It's my hearts way of healing" was what you whispered. You've never had to explain the concept of crying to anyone before. With the situation you were in, you were surprised you weren't crying all the time. His eyes flicked up to meet your own, head tilted as he tried to comprehend your words "it's how my heart expresses pain, grief. Makes room for healing"

"Your heart." His hand lowered to rest over your chest, your heart beat throbbing harshly under his fingertips "the blood filled organ that humans mistake for feelings. Tell me, if I were to rip out your heart, open it up, would there be an empty space where your tears escaped?"

You held your breath, wary of wether that was a threat or merely a cold hearted statement. He didn't seem like he was about to follow through,merely staring at where he could feel your heart thumping. You shook your head slightly, you were unsure how to explain it, why you were even trying to explain it. "Not that heart"

"I do not understand" he removed his hand, letting it fall to his side yet kept the close proximity to you, waiting patiently for you to satisfy his curiosity. Humans were so foreign him, he couldn't understand their insistence of feelings, of hearts and souls. He couldn't see them, taste them, couldn't hold them in the palm of his hand. They were a concept shared between humans, something invisible, non existent that bonded them all together.

"My souls heart." You clutched at the centre of your chest, the place where Ulquiorra had his hollow hole, stark, black empty space where his heart should've been. "Where I feel happiness and sorrow. Where I feel hate and love"

"love?" Another silly human concept. Love couldn't been seen or identified. Love couldn't be measured or quantified. It couldn't be proved with any test, couldn't be ripped from a person and be seen. "Love is a story humans tell to cover their weakness. It is socially constructed to give name to that you do not wish to acknowledge. Love is a lie told to hide your true motives. Humans are weak and scared, they fear dying alone. Love doesn't exist"

Ulquiorra turned to leave you as suddenly as he had joined you, walking across your room to the exit. You watch after him, heart clenching in your chest. He didn't know, couldn't possibly understand the power of love and emotions. Of bonds you formed. He was heartless, soulless. A hollow given more power and a humanoid form by a creation that should never have been made. It made you angry, how easily he dismissed the most beautiful part of a person that made them human.

"I pity you"

Ulquiorra stopped at your whispered confession. Turning to look over his shoulder at you, his blank expression only solidified your claim. You held his gaze with conviction, you pitied him, felt sorry for him. This man who would never understand, never experience life's greatest gift "why?" He asked, turning to face you as you stood from your seat, hands shaking gently at your sides

" because you'll never understand what it feels like to experience love. You'll never know the joy of loving someone and having them love you back. The joy, the contentment, the pleasure of sharing your soul with another. Of them trusting you enough, loving you enough to share their own." You didn't know why you suddenly felt so passionately about it, why you so desperately wanted him to understand. Maybe it was because all you had left, your soul, memories and experience were all you had, the only thing Aizen couldn't take from you. For Ulquiorra to dismiss all that you had, the only thing you had left, it fanned the embers in your stomach with a blazing surge of humanity. Something you had that Ulquiorra, that Aizen didn't possess.

Maybe you just weren't ready to give up on the only conversation you've had in weeks. Weren't ready to give up the only human interaction reminding you that you were still alive. Not ready to loose that flickering flame of hope still buried in your consciousness. Not ready to surrender, not ready to give up your fight.

You dared to walk closer to him, bravery climbing with every step you took. Passionately defending your stance on the matter right up until you got nose to nose with the passive looking Espada. "You'll never know the loving touch of someone, never know freedom of having someone love you for who you are. Never experience the rush of emotions at your first kiss, or of.."

"What does a kiss feel like?" The innocent, almost child like question had you stopping your passionate monologue. It was strange, that that was what he had focused on. You felt a pang in your heart at his unintended confession, Ulquiorra had never kissed anyone. He really never has experienced everything you were trying to defend. The reality of it made you a little sad, you really did feel sorry for him.

The conversation had taken a strange, unexpected turn, your mind was screaming at you to change it, to ignore him, get away from this hollow, unfeeling monster, before he destroys the last shred of humanity you had left. Your soul however, mourned for him. Your heart ached to reach out, to help him understand, to experience what everyone should get to feel at least once. "It feels.." how could you describe it?

"it feels like lightening shooting through your body. It feels safe and warm. It's exciting and fun. You feel exposed and vulnerable yet strong and powerful all at the same time. Warmth fills your chest and spreads through your body. It feels like magic, it feels like home"

"Will you show me?" Maybe it was the openness in his eyes, void of judgment or hatred. Maybe it was the green marks down his face that reminded you of your own tears. Maybe it was the desperation to feel something again. Or maybe it was the pain in your heart that needed healing that had you nodding yes. That had you carefully inching closer to him. He stood still, so still you could've mistaken him for a statue if not for the even fall and rise of his chest.

You slowly closed the distance, eyes flickering over his face for any sign of aggression and you neared his lips. His own eyes remained open as your fluttered closed, watching you intently as you gently brushed your lips over his. Feather light, bearing no more weight than a whisper they moulded against his own. You only lingered for a second, savouring the touch of another. Unsure when you'd get the chance, if you'd ever get the chance again, to feel another.

Your lips parted with a soft noise, breath mingling between the small space as your heart raced. He didn't push you away, nor make to pull you closer, simply standing still, allowing you to show him. You kissed him again, more firmly pressing your lips together. His lips remained motionless as you kissed him, tilting your head to fit together perfectly. Your mouth moved in familiar ways, comforting ways. A tear escaped your eyes, trailing down to your joined lips, the taste of salt staining your lips.

You carefully open your lips, guiding him to do the same. When they parted you slipped your tongue into his mouth, a jolt of electric shot through your body, reigniting all your nerves you had long thought died, when your tongue brushed against his own. Ulquiorra gripped hold of your arms, pulling you from him suddenly. You stared wide eyes, rush of fear coursing though your veins at the sudden denial. Perhaps he was going to beat you after all.

Ulquiorra stared at you as though he had seen you for the first time. One hand left your arm, going to his chest, just to the left of his hollow hole. He was breathing hard, more reaction than you had ever seen him exhibit. His eye brows furrowed in confusion, tongue slowly swiping over his bottom lip "I feel you, here" he rubbed gently over his chest "how? When you press your lips to my own, why do I feel it here?"

"That's your heart, Ulquiorra" you whispered, your lips still tingling with the memory of his own " it's our souls connecting"

"It's warm" he noted mystified, struggling to comprehend the new, previously uncharted sensation. Eyes eyes flicked between your own, searching for what you didn't know. "Will you do it again?"

You nod, stepping back into his personal space. He tilted his head down to you, closing the height difference. Slowly, letting the tension build between you, you near his lips. "Close your eyes". You whisper against his mouth, sealing them with your kiss, trusting him to listen to you. You heard his deep inhale, fingers tightening on your arm almost painfully. You blindly feel for his arm hung limply at his side, your fingers brushing over his own,cool to the touch. You guided him to your hip, shuffling closer to his body as he took hold.

You deepened the kiss, firmly pressing, pouring all your desperation, all your desire into your actions. You needed to, for him, for yourself. You needed the contact, the intimacy with another person. Needed the physical reminder, that you were alive, you were surviving, you were worth saving. You needed Ulquiorra to understand, to feel what you were trying so desperately to portray. Needed him to validate your thoughts, your beliefs, the thing you were clinging onto with both hands, because if you didn't have that, you truly had nothing left worth surviving for.

You were surprised, but pleased when you felt Ulquiorra tentatively start to kiss you back. No longer standing still, tolerating what you were doing, but actively participating in kissing you. It was surprisingly tender, sweet in the way he moved his lips against yours, feeling out the best way to mimic your movements, how to slot into place in the rhythm you had set. Encouraged by his participation, you again gently part your lips, prompting him to do the same. Your tongue sought his, caressing over the muscle languidly. Slowly you indulged his mouth, sensually exploring the area. You smiled into the kiss when you felt his own begin to taste you back, meeting your tongue in shy licks, daring to explore your mouth.

Your hands sneaked their way up to his chest, rubbing softly over his hidden pectoral muscles. Ulquiorra made a noise suspiciously similar to a grunt in the back of his throat as you caressed his chest. Releasing your arm to join his other hand on your hips, he pulled you forward, crashing your bodies together. The eager display was not something you thought he would be capable of doing, an unexpected moan broke through the kiss at the dominant move, ending your kiss.

You each breathed heavily, breath mingling as you panted inches apart. Held tightly in his embrace, you couldn't bring yourself to create distance. It was comforting, the heavy rise and fall of his chest. "I feel strange" Ulquiorra broke the silence, his voice had deepened, taken on a husky quality. He shuffled on his feet, an unusual display for the stoic man. Glancing down between you, eyes drawn to the movement of feet you notice a bulge protruding from his neither regions. Heat immediately flushed your cheeks, knowing all to well what Ulquiorra was feeling.

You let your hand trail down his chest, smoothing over his abdomen before running a finger over his swelling length. Ulquiorra grunted at the contact, hand seizing your wrist to halt your movements. You meet his eyes, wary of his warning, perhaps that was a step to far, too much too quick for the inexperienced Espada. "Is this like crying? My soul is trying to heal?"

"no, this is different" you tell him softly, staying perfectly still in his restraint, for fear he would change his mind. "This is your body seeking contact, you want to feel more, your soul is reaching out to mine. I can show you, if you like?" You waited with held breath, teeth teasing your bottom lip anxiously. You wanted this. You wanted to remember your humanity, the gift of feeling pleasure, connecting with another person in the most honest of ways.

Ulquiorra nodded, releasing the grip he had on your wrist. "I want to understand" his hand suddenly came up to cup your cheek, your eyes closing in response of the tender contact, heat pooling in your lower stomach "are you afraid of me girl?" Half laden your eyes opened, searching for his, his own emerald burning straight through you, intently searching for any shimmering emotion making itself known in your eyes.

"no, I'm not afraid" and you weren't, not now, now in this moment. You weren't afraid of Ulquiorra, you weren't afraid of what would become of you, you didn't fear for anything in that moment. Hands returned to his chest, slender fingers taking hold of the zipper at the top of his clothing. Slowly you followed the corse, metal teeth splitting apart at you decent, revealing pale white, completely void of hair skin. When you reached the end and his top split open wide, free, you made contact with his skin.

His abdomen clenched under your fingertips, goosebumps erupting behind the path you created up to his chest. Your eyes were transfixed on his hollow hole, sitting at the top of his sternum. Your palm covered the darkened hole, reminder of where his human heart was ripped out. Your fingers curiously dipped into the space, feeling the edges. It was smoother than you had thought, warmer.

"does that repulse you?" You shook your head no, kissing just to the left of it. Amazingly, it didn't, it was strange, unusual. But not repulsive. It didn't make you want to recoil, to change your mind. It was just there, a part of him. Like you're heart was a part of you. Your heart that he was trying to understand. You pushed the cloth off his shoulders, following the material down his arms, caressing the skin on your decent. It fell to the floor with a soft thud, presenting his entire top half, free for you to explore.

You kissed over his chest, grazing your teeth over the unblemished skin as you begin to disrobe your own ensemble, freeing your breasts to the cool air of the room. You let it fall unceremoniously to the floor, unashamed of your nakedness. Ulquiorra was willing to expose his soul, his humanity, you had nothing to fear, no shame over a little flesh. He watched you carefully, making no attempt to touch the new skin offered. Simply taking in the sight.

His oversized, billowing trousers slipped easily from his form at the softest of encouragement from your fingers. Erection freed, it stood proudly between you, brushing against his lower stomach. You couldn't resist your eyes darting down, taking in the length. It was straight, free of any blemishes. A decent length, nothing daunting nor overwhelming, a perfect size to fill you nicely. You could feel yourself dampen at the sight, pussy releasing its juices in preparation for the impending intrusion.

Quickly you disrobed, now that you had seen his length, you were getting needy and impatient. A thrill of excitement you had forgotten you could experience coming back to you in forceful waves. Taking his hand in your own, you lead him willingly to your bed. "Lay down" you instructed him softly, awed when he simply honoured your request. He looked stiff, like he had never experienced relaxation a day in his life. Arms laid at his sides, head staring up at the ceiling.

You climbed on the bed, throwing your leg over his own, crawling up his body until you were hovered over his erection. Your hair tumbled over your shoulders, curtaining around you both. Leaning down you kissed him, joining you together in an increasingly heating caress of tongues. Ulquiorra was getting more accustomed to the strange sensations, getting braver in the way he twisted his tongue with your own.

Your hand not supporting your weight explored his chest, following the rivets of muscles adoring his abdomen. Sneaking it lower, you took hold of his cock, fisting it in the palm of your hand. Ulquiorra gasped at your touch, head being pushed back into the pillow beneath. He had never experienced such a powerful reaction to another touch, never felt the burst of pleasure that heated up his insides.

You squeeze gently, running your hand up the length, thumb brushing over the tip before sliding your way back down. He was silky smooth, the warm weight felt nice in your hand, familiar, comforting. His hips ground towards the stimulation, pushing through the hand that had encased him. You manipulated your hand, guiding his cock to your centre, running the tip through your dampened folds, coating it with your arousal.

You a release a breathy moan, his bulbous head pushing through your lips, bumping against your hidden clit. Your mind was foggy with need, clinging on to the touch of intimacy you had been deprived of for so long. Reaching the edge of your patients, you slowly sink down, sheathing his cock into your velvety walls. Eyes closed as he stretched you open, muscles protesting the burning invasion in your neglected Cunt.

You sank down, savouring every inch until you became flush with his thighs. Head thrown back, eyes screwed up in painful bliss, you breath deeply, waiting to adjust to the cock deep inside you. "Does it hurt?" You heard him ask. Resting your hands on his chest for leverage, you shake your head no. Grinding your hips in a circular motion, spikes of pleasure radiating outwards from your inner walls.

"no" your voice had taken on a whine like quality, it felt perfect, full, human. "It feels good" you accentuated your proclamation with a harder grind, pushing him in deeper. Using your legs, you raise off his cock, leaving only the head inserted before falling back down, impaling yourself on his ridged length. Moaning, you chase the sensation, steadily riding his cock, chasing the sweet relief you so desperately craved. The sound of your laboured breathing and the slapping of your ass meeting his thighs were loud in the otherwise still room.

Sweat started glistening on your skin, burning desire coursing it's way through your veins. You watched his face, the perfect mask of indifference cracking ever so slightly as unknown pleasure was gifted upon him. His eyes locked onto your own, searching for something, anything to help him understand the warmth spreading through his stomach, the clenching in his neither regions, so indescribable.

You needed more, more touch, more closeness. Grabbing his hands, you pulled them to you, resting one on your hip, the other your neglected breast "touch me" you beg, speeding up your frenzied gyrating "touch me" you squeeze the hand over his own, encouraging him to palm the weight of your breast, bouncing lightly with your movements.

"why? For what purpose?" He asked, though did cup your breast, fingernails digging into the plump curve of your hip. His thumb brushed over your dusky pink nipple, a ripple of pleasure adding to the building damn ready to burst with a rush of erotic euphoria. "For pleasure" you pant, arousal lewdly, wetly slapping against his thighs with every slam of your ass. "Giving and reviving, sharing in the pleasure together"

That seemed to satisfy his curiosity enough for him to indulge in the experience more openly. Open his mind, body and soul to the cardinal desire of love making. His hand dropped to squeeze your hips, thrusting up to meet your own. His low groan was overshadowed by your cry of pleasure, the power of his hips snapping into you had him directly bumping into your gspot.

Your thighs were trembling, burning with the repeated rise and fall of your body. Your nails dig into the strong chest beneath you, clawing at the skin there, scrambling for an anchor to keep you present. Your arms shook, threatening to buckle under your weight, straining to keep yourself up right. Your hips faltered, frustration welled behind your eyes, you couldn't get there, couldn't yet tumble over the edge into the darkness you were striving for.

You choked out a moan that sounded suspiciously like a sob, arms loosing the battle they folded beneath you, landing you heavily into Ulquiorra's chest. His arms wrapped around your back, holding you close as he drove his dick into your clenching pussy, so hot and wet, tightly squeezing around him in the most phenomenal way.

He pushed nonsensical moans from you, tumbling as freely into his chest as easily as the tears of frustration leaving your eyes. You were frustrated with your captivity, left alone and forgotten to rot in this forsaken barren wasteland. Frustrated at your inability to save yourself, with soul society for abandoning you in your time of need, after years of loyalty and devotion. Frustrated with your ability to let go of your frustration and loose yourself in the rush of endorphins you knew awaited if you could just let go enough to crest over the edge, let the band snap.

With dizzying speed, Ulquiorra rolled your positions, laying you softly into the bed as he hovered above you, inches from your face. He gently wiped the tear from your face, following the trail down to your neck, resting his palm over your heart "is this love?" His question tickled at your lips with hot breath. "What I feel, is that what you call love?"

"no" his child like innocence was endearing, sweet even. For a being with such destructive capabilities., with no discernible humanity left, he seemed almost desperate to feel the human emotion he so blatantly disregarded not so long ago. For the first time you could see the longing in his eyes, longing turned into almost despair when you denied his question. Lifting a hand, you caressed his cheek, seeing him for the first time. Connecting to him, spiritually for the first time. He was as trapped as you were, cut off from the emotional connections of others you needed to survive.

"It's intimacy. We're connecting, opening up to the possibility for love." His eyes softened at your words, burying his head in the crook of your neck as he resumed his hips bucking into you. Clawing at his back, you felt a tremendous weight lift from your chest, freeing you from the figurative shackles that had been weighing you down. Your body moved with his own, meeting every snap of his hips with a roll of your own.

He panted wetly into your neck as you moaned into the room, pleasure building at a rapid rate, pushing your further to the edge until you leaped off it willingly, freely. You shouted as your orgasm consumed you, cleansing you of your frustrations, your fear. Your pussy clamped down tight, a gush of arousal coating his erratic thrusts, pulling him into his own release.

A clear bright light blinded him as he succumbed to the most intense feeling surging through his body. He bucked wildly, prolonging the utter bliss he felt in that moment. He felt heavy, warm. His muscles tingled throughout his body as he slumped into you. He felt you relax under him, hands slipping from his back to land heavily into the mattress. Forcing himself from your neck, he openly studied your face, relaxed with sleep.

Carefully detangling himself so not to wake you, he pulled over the blanket, covering your naked form. Laying besides you, head propped up by his arm, he watched you sleep, gently rubbing the back of his knuckles over your warm cheek. "I understand" a muttered no louder than a whisper, resting his palm over your slowing heart rate "I see now"