Through Kakashi's career as a Konaha shinobi, there was rarely a time where he truly wanted to kill in cold blood. However, as he stood behind Sakura in an examination room at the hospital, he found himself wanting to wring Yakushi Kabuto's neck. There was only a few years difference between them, but somehow, Kabuto had gotten the 'disappointed elder' routine down as he healed Sakura.
For someone who had been raised by a legendary killer and having been recruited into the shadow Anbu organization at a young age, Kabuto was surprisingly gentle with the girl. He had picked up on her curiosity immediately and didn't bother dumbing down his explanations as he described everything he was going to do to her. As for Sakura, Kakashi frowned at the awed expression on her face. He didn't know she had been interested in medical justu or else he would have nudged her into taking a few classes at the hospital.
Which only made his heart clench even harder.
Ever since the fight between Sakura and Sasuke, he swore he had aged ten years. The noise of chirping birds had been like an icepick connecting to his eardrums with how panic-inducing it had been. All he could see was his own hand through Rin's chest as Sasuke screamed at his teammate.
"I'll kill you!"
How? How had he not caught the rage simmering just below the surface for Sasuke to even think about harming one of his own comrades? Did Kakashi have to spell it out for the boy? Wasn't he the little brother of the man who replaced Kakashi as Anbu captain?
Yes, he resented the younger genius for taking the position he had fought for years to receive, and then was shoved into teaching a genin team he hadn't even wanted. Cherry on top being he was training the brother of his replacement. And the here the other jonin sensei were, wondering why Kakashi had suddenly joined them for their weekly outings at their favorite bar. It wouldn't do for him to only have one bad coping mechanism, after all.
Leaning against the wall and closing his eyes, all he could see every time he closed them was of the image of Sakura closing her eyes and a serene look of acceptance take over her face. She hadn't even bothered trying to escape Sasuke's attack nor had she believed that he would be stopped.
Kakashi knew he hadn't been the best teacher to the three, but he never thought he had let things go this far. When had Sasuke thrown the lives of his comrades away for recognition? The young Uchiha clearly had some self-value issues, especially when constantly being compared to his brother, but on Team Seven, there shouldn't have been any competition. Both Sakura and Naruto were on different levels compared to Sasuke, so what had caused such deep-seated anger to manifest?
Sakura had fought as hard as she could, even using trickery to give herself an advantage in her fights, which had been admirable. Kakashi always knew she was smart, but even when faced with an extremely limiting environment, she had been able to pull a few stunts. The henge and clone trick had been entertaining to watch in her and Naruto's fight, while he had shook his head at the feral way she had attacked Lee's student. That non-style of fighting had only been good enough to surprise her opponent who was used to fighting against traditional styles and not brawl styles untrained fighters used.
However, her throwing dirt in Sasuke's eyes had been a smart move.
She had tried to remove the deadliest weapon Sasuke had: his Sharingan. If she had been quicker and less exhausted from her previous fights, she could have gotten in a good hit while he was distracted. And if she had been an enemy shinobi, she could have killed him in that moment. However, that whole situation shouldn't have had happened.
Sasuke should have been honorable and seen her as the opponent she was. Even the most unsuspecting civilian could be deadly with the right tools. If he had taken the fight seriously, then he would have seen what she was about to do and not have let her get under his skin. A shinobi ruled by their emotions was a ticking time bomb. Nobody wanted to work with someone you couldn't trust on a mission.
"Those who break the rules are scum, but those who abandon their friends are worse than scum."
That had been the first lesson he had ever taught his students, and somehow, Sasuke had done both those things. There was no telling what the consequences of this would be.
Orochimaru was well within his right to petition for Sasuke to be banned from the shinobi life with what he had shown during the test for the apprenticeship. And with Sasuke being the Uchiha clan head's second son, the other clans would back up that petition to try and reduce the Uchiha's power. With the clan heir being in Anbu and being put on the most dangerous missions, and then the spare a mere civilian, then the other clans could swoop in and wrestle away power from them.
Which Orochimaru had no doubt known when he had decided to hold these tests. Tensions were always high between clans, and having their heirs and spares fighting only expanded on that built up resentment. But, the Sannin had no way of knowing how Sakura and Sasuke's fight would have gone.
No, that had all been Sasuke's doing.
Pulling his thoughts away from the troubled pre-teen, he instead focused on the one in front of him. Lazily, he opened his eye to see Sakura's face lit up with a smile as Kabuto started to tell her about his own time training with Orochimaru. Frowning, Kakashi couldn't remember seeing Sakura's smile that genuine. She had always worn a fake smile, letting it drop when she thought her teammates weren't looking. Now though, she looked like she had been given an early birthday present.
And well, Kakashi couldn't blame her.
Against all the odds, Sakura—his civilian born student—had been the one to win the apprenticeship. While Kakashi didn't know what had happened during the first part of the test, he had desperately wanted to stop Sakura's matches before she got hurt, but he wouldn't dare. Not when Minato-sensei was there and would have scolded him for doing so. Instead, Kakashi had been forced to see her get cut, bruised, bone broken, and nearly killed.
No matter how hard he tried, he could never protect his precious people. Sakura had nearly had the same fate as Rin, and Kakashi had almost allowed it to happen.
He couldn't afford anymore failures. He didn't know if his conscious could handle it.
But, wasn't losing his student failure enough?
Kakashi had always been hailed as a famed war hero, a shinobi that was known as 'flee on sight', and a genius since before he even joined the Academy. When word had gotten around that he would be a jonin sensei, everyone had high expectations of him, convinced he would produce three mini-copies of himself within the year.
Oh, how badly he had failed at that.
And there weren't going to be any second chances.
Unlike the other teams, Orochimaru wouldn't have a tense conversation over tea with him and talk about all the ways his students could improve. No, he was instead taking one of his students. It had already stung when he had to hand Naruto over to Jiraiya, but losing two of his students to shinobi far stronger than himself was utterly humiliating. Now everyone would realize the kind of failure he truly was.
"Now, no strenuous activities and you'll need to be monitored tonight because of your concussion." Kabuto spoke kindly, but when his eyes met Kakashi's, they were anything but. The younger man was subtly trying to kill him with his gaze alone if Kakashi had to guess. But, seeing as he wasn't from a clan with a doujustu, he doubted he'd drop dead. Although, with a sibling of Anko, he'd better check all his foods for poison.
"Aww, do I have to stay here?" Sakura whined. "I want to sleep in my own bed."
"Well…" Kabuto pursed his lips and glanced over at him again. The implication was clear: 'You hurt her, I poison your food until you finally keel over'. What the hell? Just because she's now Orochimaru's apprentice doesn't mean she's been adopted into the family, Kakashi complained to himself. "As long as your family or sensei look after you tonight, then it should be fine."
"Then it's been decided," Kakashi spoke up for the first time since they had arrived. Kami, he hated hospitals. "I'll stay with her tonight."
"What? You don't have to do that Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura rushed to say, wholly uncomfortable with the proposition.
"Yes, I do." He said flatly. "Your family is out of the village right now, and you can't be left alone with a half-healed concussion."
Sakura looked ready to fight him, even glancing at Kabuto for help, but finally her shoulders slumped in defeat, and she nodded in acceptance. With that out of the way, Kakashi swiftly got them both out of there, even with Kabuto looking like he was ready to tear his throat out for taking Sakura away from him. Damn Orochimaru's adopted kids and their possessiveness.
As they made their way through the village, Kakashi slowed his stride to match Sakura's much more exhausted one. Her balance was much better, her arm healed, and her cuts and bruises left to heal by themselves. Kabuto had given her a stern talking to about setting her own broken nose, while still looking impressed by how well she had done so. Kakashi really should have had her learn medical justu. Too little, too late. Yet, another thing to add to his ever-growing list of failings.
"Maa, Sakura-chan," he spoke up suddenly, and if the situation wasn't what it was, he would have chuckled at the way she jumped. But, as it stood, there was too much to discuss for any humor. "Why didn't you tell me your family was gone?"
"I, well, I didn't think you'd want to know," Sakura mumbled, not meeting his eyes. Sighing quietly, Kakashi didn't blame her. He tried not to delve deeply into his students' life outside of training, mainly to be courteous about their privacy.
"You should have told me," he gently scolded her. "As your sensei, I need to know about your wellbeing. I know you are capable of taking care of yourself, but if anything were to happen, I would need to know."
"I'll do better, Kakashi-sensei."
He had to bite his tongue to tell her that she wouldn't have to try much with him. She'd only be his student for only a few more days, and then she would have to report to Orochimaru instead.
"Congratulations on winning the apprenticeship." He wasn't happy about it, but it was something to celebrate; barely anyone got to train with someone so knowledgeable and as fearsome as one of the Sannin.
"Thank you, sensei." Sakura mumbled, but by the way she bit her lip, he could tell she wanted to say something else. Giving her time to gather her courage, Kakashi glanced around as they entered the civilian district. Sakura's footing was sure as they weaved through the streets, but Kakashi felt out of place in his jonin vest and headband. Far too many people were staring at him—either subtly or out right—and it was putting him on edge.
"Nee, Kakashi-sensei?"
"Yes, Sakura-chan?"
"Are you mad that Orochimaru-sama chose me?"
This time, Kakashi let his sigh be audible as he looked down at the girl's bowed head. How could he explain that he was more disappointed in himself than her? She was stuck in the middle of his own ineptitude and the games Orochimaru seemed to be playing with the clans and the village itself.
"No, I'm not," he spoke as truthfully as he could. "But, I am sad to see my students leaving me. Barely half a year and you're already leaving the nest."
He smiled at the small giggle he received for his more theatrical words, and he wished he could hear it more often. He didn't realize how much he didn't know his only kunoichi until now. While six months was a long time to be a teacher, it wasn't much in the grand scheme of a ninja's career. A team of three genin and their jonin teacher could last up to three years at the minimum. The Third Hokage's own team had stuck with him for ten years until more and more missions surrounding the Second Shinobi War forced them apart. Kakashi wondered if this was all chance, or if it was because he was a bad teacher. Another stab of self-hate, but he couldn't fall apart until after Sakura was home and safe.
They were quiet as Sakura led him to her house, which he had only visited once. He had almost forgotten that her parents were from a very affluent merchant clan.
"Tadaima," Sakura called out softly, but of course received no response. Kakashi thought back to his own short childhood and returning to a dark, empty house. Why hadn't he asked Sakura how her family was doing? Well, it wasn't as if he had asked either of his other students. The Uchiha clan still kept him at an arms length, while Minato invited him over for dinner every chance he could, even if Kakashi only accepted a fraction of time.
"Do you want to eat first, or go to bed?" Kakashi asked after they stood for a few minutes in awkward silence. He didn't know what to do. Yes, he was her teacher, but being left in an empty house with a young teenager set his teeth on edge. There's nothing weird about this. I'm doing what any other sensei would do and look after my student.
"I really just want to pass out," Sakura told him plainly. Kakashi didn't fight her on it. There were dark circles under her eyes, and she looked as if a strong wind could push her over.
"Go," he told her gently. "I'll wake you in an hour so we can monitor how your concussion is."
"Okay."
With heavy steps, Sakura disappeared upstairs, leaving Kakashi alone.
Sighing, he decided to make himself at home. The house was modern and extremely spacious, but unlike some clan homes he had visited before, this one felt lived in. Pictures littered the walls, while little knickknacks from around the Five Nations could be seen all over the house. However, what caught his eye was the family tree proudly put on display in the living room.
It took up most of the wall.
Perplexed, he scanned over the elaborate tapestry and grew increasingly shocked at the merchant clan. Next to each branch was where they lived, with at least one branch in every manage village and in the capitals of each nation. The main branch was still in the Land of Iron, while Sakura's parents had stemmed from the Land of Mist and Fire. Her father had married into the clan, taking the name on since he had been an orphan without a family name.
He followed every connection between the family members, and he began to understand. Look underneath the underneath.
With how many family members there were across the Five Nations and the open boarders for merchants in this time of peace, that meant the Haruno clan could essentially travel to the ends of the world without any trouble. No nation would be stupid enough to reject such a wealthy and influential merchant group such as the Haruno. Even if that meant they had to share said merchant clan across the nations.
All of this boiled down to, the Haruno clan specialized in much more than trade items—they were spies.
Not necessarily spies against Konaha. The Hokage worked closely with the civilian clans, including the Haruno clan, and it wouldn't be surprising if he used them to send messages. Sometimes sending a shinobi messenger was much too risky and a more delicate hand was needed. With how spread out the Haruno clan was, it wasn't surprising they would be the best choice to do ask of for this task. However, it was a double-edged sword. The Haruno clan could easily have the same deal with the other hidden villages, but that was a risk they had to take with such a powerful clan. If they cut off trade, then the village would be crippled irreparably. No other merchants would want to travel there and Konaha didn't have enough resources within its walls to sustain every shinobi and civilian.
Idly, Kakashi wondered if Jiraiya was in contact with Sakura's parents.
Stepping away from the tapestry, Kakashi headed up the stairs towards where he assumed Sakura's room was. Walking up the stairs, he passed many pictures of the Haruno clan and couldn't help but admire the large range of hair colors within the family. Wait, that shade of red looked familiar…
Stay focused, he chided himself. Putting on mental blinders, Kakashi went towards the room at the end of the hall and poked his head through the slightly ajar door. Sakura had been so tired, she hadn't even bothered to get undressed, and was sleeping above the covers. Her room was meticulously clean with two walls covered by overflowing bookshelves. Silently entering the room, he skimmed over the books and raised his eyes at some of the titles. What was a twelve-year-old girl doing with thick books on economics and clan politics? The topics ranged from what he would expect of a civilian born into a merchant clan, while some topics even he hadn't even studied, such as the intricacies of chakra manipulation.
"Too little, too late," Kakashi repeated to himself.
If only he had known.
He must have really had his head up his own ass not to realize he had a genius on his team. Maybe now she could really flourish under a different teacher.