Present Day

Her period lasted for two more days.

Two more days of near constant nausea and very consistent bleeding, not to mention cramps so bad Tess wasn't just willingly taking the pain medication but actively asking for it. When he called Vivienne to update her on what was going on and to try to lighten Tess's spirits that was what made her realize how bad it was, but while they weren't due home for another few months at least she'd made Tess laugh and that was something. That was everything.

She found the three-day cycle hilarious, several times he'd found her mumbling maiden, mother, crone under her breath, joking that she'd skipped the motherhood phase and was a crone now. She'd laughed whenever he called her a pagan but he knew it bothered her too, not the jokes but the position they were in. He hadn't tried to talk to her about it yet but that didn't mean he hadn't been thinking about it, and it didn't mean he hadn't been talking to anyone; he'd looped Vivienne in on his plan and she'd shared it with Nysa, his nerves lessening when both women agreed with him. It only really mattered if Tess did but they knew her just as well and when it came to female issues they understood her in a way he couldn't, so their trust meant a lot to him. He debated reaching out to Kim, everyone on his team had offered to come by but he'd turned them down, wanting to give Tess time to rest which they all understood. But his kind-hearted teammate was the one she was closest with, the one she had the most in common with. The only thing stopping him was being unsure whether she would want her personal information shared, rather whether he thought it was okay to share it because while it might be hard for him Jay knew he needed to step up. He'd realized during the Hollowell investigation that Tess needed him to take charge sometimes but he hadn't actually done it yet, too busy worrying about when it would be appropriate to.

But it was whenever he thought it was.

If he was wrong and he overstepped then Tess would tell him and he'd apologize and they would figure out a solution but he couldn't keep holding back out of fear of hurting her.

That was what was hurting her. Part of it anyway.

In the end he decided not to call Kim, he didn't think she would say anything that different than Viv and Nysa and it would be good for Tess to have someone impartial to talk to on her own, though he did make a mental note to find out whether she did reach out to her friend. Later. As many plans as he was making his focus right now was on taking care of Tess, pretty easy to do when she let him. Seeing her in pain was as hard as it ever was, especially that second night when things had really peaked. He'd had to call Will because he'd thought they should take her back to the hospital but thankfully his brother had come over and deemed it unnecessary. And now it was done. Her nausea had stopped last night, her cramps this morning and it was four in the afternoon now and she'd only had to change her period underwear once today so they were both cautiously optimistic it was over.

Until next time.

"I am not looking forward to doing this again." Tess said with a groan as she lowered herself onto the bed beside him, now that she could easily walk around again she was taking full advantage but he still tugged her into his side.

And then after a brief mental debate rolled on top of her.

"Hi there."

"Hi."

"Whatcha doing?" She asked with a confused smile, though her arms quickly wrapped around him.

"I want to talk to you. Well, actually I want to talk at you."

Immediately her face tightened but with four breaths it smoothed out, and then softened, her smile now sad but her gaze understanding as she nodded. "Okay."

Okay.

"I want to start by reiterating that I know this has been harder on-"

"No-"

"Damnit Tess-"

"Just let me say this and then I'll shut up, okay?" She said quickly, those big blue eyes pleading with him so of course he listened. "This is hard on both of us. In different ways yes but not more and not less."

No more.

No less.

Tess relaxed when he kissed her, an instinctive action and one that had the tightness in his own shoulders loosening. Not entirely, that wouldn't happen until this conversation was done but her acknowledgement made it easier for him to continue.

"This has been hard on both of us. But it is still your body so the final decision is yours. That being said, I've done a lot of thinking and I have a plan. You get two more periods. This was your maiden, you get a mother and a crone and then you get a hysterectomy, but not before you get your eggs harvested. That way, if down the road we decide we want kids, we can still have ones that are genetically ours. Not that that matters to me, but the option is there. Viv even offered, actually demanded to be our surrogate-"

"You talked to Vivienne about this?" She cut in incredulously but he supposed it was impressive she'd stayed quiet this long.

Jay had seen her face changing as he spoke, surprise, a bit of humour, a brief but intense flare of sadness and fear then more surprise, and through it all comfort and appreciation that he had thought this hard to find a way to make her feel better.

After all this time she still didn't understand how he'd fallen for her, but then he didn't get how she'd fallen for him.

"I had to make sure I wasn't off base. And I don't think I am. But here's the important thing, and I need you to hear me on this okay?" Tess nodded warily, a little bit stiffer where she still lay beneath him but her fingers were flexing on his sides, soothing herself with his presence rather than trying to push him away which made him relax even more. "I don't want kids. I don't want to have to choose between my job and my kid and I don't want to experience all the fear and pain that comes with having one."

"You would be a great dad." She whispered, shaking her head but leaning into him when he kissed away the tears gathering in the corners of her eyes.

"I think you're right. But that doesn't mean I want it. And I don't think you do either. We're grieving what we might have had but you're the one who taught me about the multiverse which means that some version of us is. Let them be amazing parents. You and me get this life, action and adventure and us. The only dirty diapers we'll have to change are our own."

A teary laugh slipped out and he could see that she wanted to look away but she didn't, forcing herself to truly hear him, to let it sink in.

"I don't need to be a father. And I don't want to be. What I want and what I need-"

"Is me." She finished, letting out a soft breath as one of her hands slowly travelled up his chest to rest gently on his jaw, staring at him for a long minute before she nodded. "Two more."

Thank you.

He took her mouth deeply, always better at showing over telling and Tess was quick to match him, not a lusty kiss but with the same intensity, a love that wouldn't ever fade. So strong they had felt it the first moment they'd been within five hundred yards of each other.

"I have another idea." Jay managed to rasp when they finally parted, the smile she gave him so sweet he was determined to make it even brighter.

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"Are you kidding me? You don't feel anything?"

"I feel it, it just doesn't hurt." Kim told Adam with a grin, matching the ones Hailey, Vanessa, Natalie and Tess had, the latter looking especially pleased.

"Let's go up to level five then."

"Okay yeah, that's like a regular cramp."

"Five?" Adam asked incredulously, ignoring him, Will and Kevin as they all laughed at him. "Level five, halfway up the scale, is normal for you?"

"I told you women were stronger than men." Hailey said with a smirk, her partner cackling next to her with pure glee as Kim made it all the way to level ten, still barely reacting, and as her boyfriend's face got more pinched.

"I can't believe this was your idea." Adam muttered as Vanessa took Kim's place, rolling his eyes when Jay grinned.

"You don't want to know what she goes through?" Will asked, his brother shooting him a smirk when he laughed at Adam's disgruntled expression.

"Just because I want to be there for her doesn't mean I want to experience it myself."

"What was that?" Tess asked, giving their friend a wicked look when he quickly shook his head, watching with growing anticipation as she put Vanessa through each of the levels.

His second idea.

That she build her own period simulator.

And then try it out on them.

She'd run off to start on it about five seconds after the words had left his mouth, giggling so mischievously Jay had followed her so he could soak in the sound, only a tiny bit scared by just how quickly she'd put it together. There really wasn't anything she couldn't do. And there wasn't anything he wouldn't do to put that smile on her face. Or his teams. Or his brothers. As much as he enjoyed watching Adam squirm, Will and Kevin too though they were better at hiding it, what he really appreciated was seeing the way the women were bonding, especially Tess and Hailey. She and Kim had connected during the first case Tess had worked with them, an intimate understanding he knew was behind the extra soft smiles Kim was occasionally sending his girl, Adam catching his eye and giving him his own supportive look each time but it had taken longer for her to get along with Vanessa and Hailey. And while he was, though he wouldn't admit it to her growing to like the little sister vibes he and Vanessa were cultivating, which seemed to be extending to Tess too it meant something extra special to him to see the respect and kindness in how she and Hailey looked at each other. To see that it was finally reciprocated.

And seeing her and Nat? One look at his brother told him he saw the sisterly bond too, and liked it just as much. The only thing he didn't love was how all the women started smirking when they were done, minus Tess who everyone agreed had been through enough.

It was going to be really embarrassing if he couldn't make it to level ten.

"Alright, who's first?" She asked with a wave of the remote, unsurprised when he stepped forward to meet the challenge in her eyes.

"Hook me up."

He puffed his chest out at Adam and Kevin when they sucked in quiet breaths but he knew by their chuckles the women all saw his nerves. But fuck it. They had to go through this every month, the least he could do was suck it up for five minutes. Plus, Jay was curious to find out what it felt like- he knew how strong each of them were, especially Tess, she'd been tortured close to a dozen times for fucks sake so she was intimately familiar with hurt and while he knew this last period wasn't the norm she'd always found them painful.

And fuck was it.

None of them had shown any reactions until level three, all agreeing their normal was between a level five to seven, though they'd each made it to level ten easily. Meanwhile he felt it as soon as the damn machine turned on, a weird tingle in his abdomen that had the girls chuckling and Kevin and Adam shaking their heads; he got to level three before Jay found himself holding back a wince, level five before he had to consciously keep his face neutral. And then it went to level six and one of the jolts in his abdomen shot down his leg and he lost the fight.

"You okay babe?" Tess asked with a grin, though he almost didn't hear her over Vanessa's cackle.

"I still can't believe it goes down your legs like that."

"What?"

"Say again?"

He just nodded at Adam and Kevin, enjoying Adam's wide eyes and Kevin's slow nod, both taking deep breaths to prepare themselves for the inevitable while his brother just smirked, for some reason very unbothered.

"You want to take him to level ten?"

He looked over to see Hailey cautiously taking the little remote from Tess, the two sharing a moment before Tess's eyes flicked his way and they shared a brief but deep one of their own. It hadn't occurred to him that putting him through this would be anything but enjoyable for her but with one look he saw her discomfort and shot her a fast smile.

"It is my duty and my honour to experience any level of your pain."

Will laughed but Adam immediately let out a loud groan and he even felt Kev shooting him a look, and Vanessa too but he ignored them all to focus on the pink that crept onto Tess's cheeks, completely undermining her wry smile and the way she flapped a hand at him. He shot her a wink to make that flush grow, which it did, giving his friends a cocky look before he turned to Hailey; she was smiling at him too and while there was still a hint of regret in her gaze there was a lot more of the woman he knew.

And he definitely recognized the smirk right before she took him up to level seven.

Fuck that hurt.

Jay couldn't stop his knee from bouncing but he made it to level ten, even had Hailey hold it there for a minute before Tess told him to stop being a martyr. It still wasn't anything close to what she'd experienced but he sure had a better understanding now and if it meant he got her tucked into his side while Kevin took his place, and Vanessa snatched the remote out of her partner's hand, well that was just a bonus. So was watching Kevin, Adam and Will make their way through the levels, like him managing to keep it mostly together until level six, though they made it all the way to the end, albeit with scrunched faces, tight fists and a couple curses on Adam's end. He was reminded of when they'd gone through taser recertification, that sense of camaraderie so much stronger now.

A functional family.