ConSeQuences Chapter 19, a twilight fanfic

Thank you, Mel Cee, and Sassy Noles… you ladies are awesome!

Chapter 18: You and Me

Bella

"Bee, calm down." Tanya playfully rolled her eyes. "You look great. Grayson won't be able to keep his hands off you." She smirked and looked me up and down. "I don't even swing that way and I'm tempted."

I wore a timeless, elegant one-shoulder silhouette, fitted black dress, with a gold chain belt along with gold accessories.

I hip-checked her as we both stood in front of the floor-length mirror and laughed. "I don't know why I'm so nervous. Since we've been back in school, Grayson and I have talked more now than we did when I was home."

Sometimes I felt Grayson was the type of guy almost too-good-to-be-true. You know the type that does and says everything right and you wonder when, not if, the other shoe will drop. But between talking to Tanya about it and having my own time to think about it, I decided I wouldn't make Grayson pay for someone else's mistakes.

Truthfully, he was the same person he's always been. He'd helped me to realize that not every guy was like Edward. Not all of them were disloyal. Some of them really wanted a genuine connection with just you.

"You can say that again." Tanya scrunched her nose. "No, but seriously, Bee, I'm so happy for you. I haven't seen you laugh like this…" she pursed her lips and tilted her head back and forth. "…in a while. He just might be your person."

She was right too. Every morning around six we were on the phone. Coincidentally, we'd both chosen a nine-thirty as our first class for the day, so we talked for at least an hour. Even between classes, we'd shoot each other text messages. We tried to talk in the evenings after class, but that depended upon the amount of homework we had. But no matter what, Sundays at noon were reserved for our Skype conversations.

"That's true. But it didn't start out like that with Edward. We did have fun in the beginning." I shook my head thinking about how it used to be. "But he just couldn't…" I tsked and trailed off.

"Exactly! He couldn't keep his shit in his pants." Her gaze flicked upward. "He had to share it with every damn body. I'm surprised it hasn't fallen off yet with as much action as he gets."

Some months ago, Tanya would not have made a comment like that because she knew it would've messed me up. But what was that old saying: "time heals all wounds." I was not sure if I completely agreed with that saying but after putting space between Edward and me, time did help me to self-reflect and process everything.

I laughed and shook my head. "Whatever he does with his cock is not my business anymore." Damn, that felt good to say, and I didn't even not feel a tinge of pain.

"Enough about Dickward." She sucked her teeth. "Let's talk about whose cock is yourbusiness." She lightly bumped my shoulder.

"You know we haven't gone that far yet." I palmed my forehead. "I told him I wanted to take it slow, and he's been fine with that. Although, we've had some heavy make out sessions before I left."

"I get that, Bee. After what you've been through you should take your time. Just don't make Grayson pay for what Edward did."

"I won't. I could never do Gray like that." I sat down on the edge of my bed. "He's been so sweet and patient with me."

"You know Grayson reminds me a lot of my Garrett." Tanya sat across from me on her bed. "I have a good feeling about him, Bee." She smiled. "I think he's going to be it for you."

Tanya had this sixth sense about her. It could be scary as hell sometimes, but she was usually right.

"T, I haven't thought that far ahead yet. I don't want to jinx it." I bit the inside of my cheek.

"You can tell that BS to someone else because you're not fooling me." She threw her pillow at me, but I caught it. "I've known you my whole life, girl."

"Okay, okay." I waved her off. "I've thought about it a tiny bit." I held my index finger and thumb apart with very little space between them.

"I knew that already." Tanya smirked.

I threw her pillow back at her. "I don't want to move too fast with that either. I feel things for Gray that I've never felt before, not even with Edward." I ran my hands through my hair. "And to be honest…" My voice was shaky. "I'm scared as hell."

She raised her eyebrows. "Scared of what?"

"Of being hurt again." I broke eye contact and shrugged.

Before I knew it, my bed dipped, and Tanya's arms were around me. "Oh, sweetie." She pulled me in for a tight hug. "You know the instinct of self-preservation can protect us from repeating mistakes and experiencing pain, but it can also prevent us from living life to the fullest."

I turned and looked at her in the face and snorted a laugh. "Who the hell are you? Buddha?" She released her arms from me and threw her head back as she laughed. We laughed so hard, we started crying.

I didn't want to smear my makeup, so I patted the tears under my eyes. "Oh my god, T. My face is probably a mess now."

"That's your fault. We were having an emotional moment and you ruined it by laughing." Then she started laughing again.

Tanya has been my BFF since kindergarten. We'd been through it all together. From thinking boys were disgusting, to holding a boy's hand for the first time and I couldn't forget the first kiss. Coming home and talking on the phone for hours about our first boyfriends in the eighth grade.

Then in our junior year of high school when Garrett and Tanya made love for the first time-I spent the night at her house, and we stayed up and talked about it until the sun came up the next day.

We repeated the same thing the first time Edward and I were together. But she was also there for me when it all blew up in my face and rocked me until I couldn't cry anymore.

Through the many ups and downs we'd had, we'd always faced them together. But no matter how grim it looked, she always figured out a way to make me laugh.

I got up and looked in the mirror. It wasn't too bad. My eyeliner was smudged a little bit but my mascara was waterproof. I grabbed a wet wipe and lightly wiped away the eyeliner and then reapplied more and added a little powder.

"See, all good now." Tanya walked up behind me, smiling.

"Yes, thank you, old wise one for such great counsel," I snarked.

"Continue to listen and you will learn much little grasshopper." She folded her arms over her chest.

I chuckled and shook my head while I looked at her in the mirror. "You know I love your crazy ass, right?"

"I love you too." She winked at me. "All kidding aside, Bee, talk to Grayson and tell him how you feel. You never know, he could be feeling the same way as you."

She had a point. We definitely needed to talk.

Grayson

"Dude, this was fast. Too fast. I don't want to scare her off."

Graham exhaled loudly into the phone. "How the hell would you scare her off?"

"You know she went through all the bullshit with Edward." I still got angry and wanted to beat his ass every time I thought about how he'd treated her. Bella wasn't the type you played with. She was the type you brought home and introduced to the family and asked to marry.

"Yeah, that dumbass really fucked her over. Maybe you should just tell her how you feel."

"I really want to but I'm on edge about it." I shifted from foot to foot.

"Gray, you've been pining over her since you met her. You damn near stopped dating because she was all you ever talked about."

When other girls approached me after I'd met Bella, I found myself comparing them to her. I knew it wasn't right or fair, but she was the only one I saw-the only one I wanted- despite her being with Edward then. Yeah, I knew I sounded pathetic, but it was what it was.

I had never been, and I mean never, attracted to a woman the way I was to her. But it was more than a physical attraction. I wanted to find out everything about her. There was this indescribable pull I had to her and I didn't want to fight it.

"I know." My forehead wrinkled.

"I know you all talk all the time. You've flaked on me and Leo on a regular just so you can call her."

"Whatever." I laughed lightly. "Why wouldn't I put her first over some roughnecks?"

"Well, then you should be comfortable enough telling her."

Every opportunity I got I called or texted her. I missed her so much. If I wasn't about to graduate, I would've transferred to her school.

"I don't know, Graham. I don't want to rush things and risk losing her. She means too much to me."

I meant what I said when I told Bella she would set the pace for our relationship. I knew her trust was fragile, but I was more than willing to show her I could be the man she deserved.

"I'm going, to be honest with you, Gray. You know I don't know the first thing about relationships. I haven't been in anything committed since my sophomore year in high school, and that ended shitty. But I do know communication is important."

Graham clowned around most of the time, but he had a good head on his shoulders.

"You're right but that's one of those things where it's easier said than done." I ran my hand through my hair for the millionth time today.

He impatiently huffed. "You love her, right?"

"Yeah, but you already knew that." I paced back and forth in front of the bed.

"What I don't understand is why you've made this harder than it has to be. See, that's the difference between you and me. I'm straight forward and you're the diplomat." He chuckled.

Leo, Graham, and I had always balanced each other out. Graham was the almost too blunt, straight shooter. I was more diplomatic in my approach, well with most things. Meanwhile, Leo was even-tempered all the time.

"And that's why I'm the one that bails you and that mouth of yours out of trouble too." I smirked.

"We're not talking about me right now," he defended. "We're talking about how much of a pussy you're being by not telling Bella you're in love with her. You're the most confident fucker I know, and a girl that's barely five feet tall has thrown you off your game." The asshole laughed. "Wait until I tell Leo about this shit."

"Fuck you."

"Nope. I like poontang." He laughed.

I knew I was pushing it when we'd been on the phone for the past thirty minutes talking about the same thing. Graham liked to debate and analyze any and everything. However, when it came to committed relationships, that was when he was out of his league.

Even though being faithful to one girl wasn't in his view right now, I knew the day would come when his one would come, and love would knock him right on his ass.

"Anyway, dumb ass." I rolled my eyes. "I'm about to start getting ready. I have to pick Bella up soon."

"All right." Graham cleared his throat. "All kidding aside, Gray, just be honest with her. From what I know of Bella, she is a pretty level-headed girl. I don't believe she'd want you to keep something this major from her."

"I'll tell her soon." I plopped down on the bed. "Maybe just not tonight."

"Don't stress about it. You'll know when the time is right," Graham said.

What he said was simple but profound.

"Thanks. Talk later."

"Later." Then he ended the call.

I glanced at the time and threw my phone on the comforter and lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. I had gotten on my own nerves. The entire ride down, I'd been debating with myself if I'd confess my feelings to Bella tonight or just wait.

As much as I tried not to, I'd fallen in love with Bella while we were still just friends. Before she and Edward had broken up. No knew but Leo and Graham. Although, I wasn't sure if she'd caught on or not by the way I'd look at her sometimes.

Graham and Leo busted me out the day we went downtown to the Taste of Chicago. They said I looked like some love-sick-ass puppy, being guided on a leash.

Their teasing didn't bother me one way or the other. It was Bella I was more concerned about. Had she already noticed? And if so, had I made her uncomfortable? Did she know I'd fallen for her a long time ago? Was it too much too soon? Had I pushed her into something she wasn't ready for yet?

"Ah, Fuck." I ran my hand over my face. My mind had been racing from one possibility to the next for days. One minute, I'd decided I would tell her, and the next I'd changed my mind again. All of this second-guessing myself was frustrating.

I shook my head and laughed at myself. "Get your shit together, Walsh." I pushed myself off the bed and walked into the bathroom to shower.

CCCCCCCCC

I slid on my green jacket on then turned around and locked my truck with my fob. My eyes bounced from one thing to another as I walked toward Bella's dorm.

It wasn't just a campus-it was like its own little city, with all the historic buildings. Although it was early evening, people still milled about enjoying the last of the summer weather.

It was a good thing I was in shape. It felt like I walked a mile before I found Bella's dorm, Bousfield Hall. I walked inside the building and was greeted by a blonde seated behind the desk. "Hi there handsome. I've never seen you before." She licked her lips.

As big as this campus was, I could've easily gone to this school and never saw her.

"Hello." I nodded with a tight-lipped smile. I didn't want to give her the wrong impression, so I turned around and pulled my phone out.

"Can I help you, cutie?" She smiled.

"Nah, I'm good." I looked over my shoulder. I scrolled to Bella's name in my contact list and pushed it.

"I bet you are," she said. The innuendo was heavy in her tone, but I refused to dignify that with an answer.

"Hey, baby," Bella greeted.

"Hey, love," I crooned. "I'm downstairs in the lobby."

"Okay. I'm on my way down." She disconnected the call.

I saw a chair in the far corner, walked over, and sat down. I kept my phone out and played a game, pretending to be into it more than I really was.

"Excuse me." The blonde cleared her throat, but I didn't look up. "Are you here picking someone up?"

"Yeah. She's on her way down," I replied still looking down at my phone.

"Oh." She sounded disappointed.

Good. Hopefully, she finally got the message.

I heard a ding and finally lifted my head.

I staggered to my feet as I watched Bella step off the elevator in a black dress that hugged her curvaceous body. Her hair hung down her back in deep waves and her makeup was subtle. She was so beautiful, as far as I was concerned, she didn't need any.

I wasn't sure how I moved, as I was mesmerized by the sway of her hips, but somehow I made my way to her. Bella had the walk of a model that demanded the attention of anyone in the room. What made her even more beautiful was she was modest as hell about her looks.

My eyes trailed down to her shapely legs and noticed the sexiest pair of heels I'd ever seen on her petite feet. They were suede and they wrapped around her ankles. I wanted to throw her over my shoulder, speed back to my hotel room and worship her body all night while she kept the shoes on.

"I—you look—" I stammered, and she graced me with a smile that lit up the room.

I closed the distance between us, leaned down, and softly kissed her on the lips.

"Hi." She beamed up at me. "You look very handsome." She wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me, tightly. "I've missed you so much, Gray."

I placed both hands on the small of her back, enjoying her body next to mine. "Bee, words can't express how much I've missed you. Even though we talk every day, I've missed holding you." I intertwined our fingers together. "I missed touching your beautiful face." I took my other hand and gently cupped her cheek. I looked into her deep, velvety, gold-flecked, chocolate-brown eyes, and was I completely absorbed. Everything about her fascinated me.

"Grayson," Bella whispered.

I had always felt some type of connection with her, but the more we got to know each other the deeper it became. It was difficult to define. I felt like there was an intrinsic bond between us on some type of energetic level. But I hadn't really noticed it until we were away from each other. I thought about her all the time, and no matter what I was doing my thoughts always went back to her.

I leaned down and placed my forehead on hers. Although I wanted to do more than that, we were in the dorm lobby, so I restrained myself. "Are you ready?" I asked.

"Yes." She nodded.

I kissed her on the top of her head before I finally let her go.

That was when I noticed the blonde behind the desk had been watching us like we were a movie. I knitted my eyebrows together and shook my head.

The sad part was she didn't even look embarrassed for staring. Couples hugged and kissed in public all the time. It was not like we got carried away with inappropriate behavior. At least I didn't think so.

Bella let her other hand fall from my waist and turned so we could walk out. We were almost to the set of glass doors when the blonde spoke up. "Hey, Bella." She stopped and turned around. "Yeah, what's up, Colleen?" Bella replied.

"Is he the guy you were talking to Tanya about the other day?" She twirled strands of her hair around her finger.

"Yes." Bella squeezed my hand tighter and smiled. "This is my Grayson."

I grinned down at her and kissed her on the cheek. Unbeknownst to Bella, she had staked her claim to the chick that had been checking me out from the moment I walked into the building.

"Nice to meet you, Grayson." A slow smiled spread across her face.

"I'm sure." I plastered a fake smile on my face. Graham would've laughed hard had he been here to see me in one of my more undiplomatic moments. But ask me if I cared.

She frowned slightly but fixed her face quickly. But I was sure Bella saw it too. "Well, enjoy yourselves."

"We will." Bella waved as she pulled me out the door with her.

"What's up with her?" I thumbed back to the building as we walked toward my truck.

She abruptly stopped walking. "I'm not saying she's easy, but…" she bit her lip. "…but if her vaj had a password it would be a password."

I leaned back and cackled. I wasn't surprised at Bella's snark because she could roll with the best of them. It was just funny as hell to hear her say it.

I laughed so hard she started laughing too. People that were walking to their cars slowed down and looked around us to see what we were in hysterics about.

After I finally caught my breath, I put my hand on Bella's back. "Come on, sweetheart, let's go. I don't want us to be late for our reservation at Hamilton Walker's."

That was another one of the places she mentioned she'd like to go to one day. Once we had settled on a date for my visit, I'd set up our whole weekend.

She turned her head quickly and stared at me. "Seriously?"

"Seriously." I kissed the tip of her nose.

All amusement was gone from her face. She reached up and palmed the jaw. "You're full of one surprise after another. How did I get so lucky?"

I laid my hand on top of hers. "I told you before, baby, I'm the lucky one. If you let me, I plan to surprise you for the rest of our lives." I used my other hand to brush her hair behind her shoulder.

I felt tension in my stomach at my revelation about wanting a future with her, but I'd always been a man of my word.

Her face softened as she wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me down closer to her. "I'd like that."

A slow smile spread across my face as I embraced her, letting out a huge breath. "Bee, you don't know how happy you've made me." I pulled back and crashed my lips to hers. Our tongues tangled as my hands roamed up and down her back. Remembering where we were, I ran my tongue across her bottom lip, bringing an end to our heated kiss.

Her breath hitched, and her red lips were swollen, and her eyelids were hooded. Her fingers were still knotted in my hair. I gently pulled them out and kissed the inside of each hand. "We need to go, love."

She nodded in agreement and placed her arm around my waist, and we continued to walk to my truck.

Albeit the walk was a little difficult for me, as I willed the bulge in my pants to go down by thinking of Grandma Walsh.

Bella

I couldn't take my eyes off of him tonight. Grayson had always been incredibly sexy, but I was drawn to him like a moth to a flame. His jacket displayed his broad shoulders, and his white shirt, which had the top three buttons undone, showed off his well-defined chest. I wanted to crawl across the table and lick it.

I shook my head to snap myself out of the sex haze I'd found myself in since I stepped off of the elevator. If Grayson hadn't slowed the kiss down in the parking lot, we wouldn't have made it to the restaurant.

Either I was horny as hell or Grayson had grown more attractive since I'd left home. For the past week, I'd had to change soaked sheets every night because of the wet dreams I'd been having. I had never been so thankful that Tanya slept like a log, otherwise, she wouldn't let me live it down.

I felt like a lustful teenager.

So, with him sitting across the table from me looking like a GQ model, my hand in his, as he rubbed small circles on my hand, gazing into my eyes intensely, did not help matters at all.

I shivered under the scrutiny of his warm honey hues with accents of deep caramels.

"Are you cold, my love?" He pulled his hand from mine and had began to remove his jacket.

Actually, I was quite the opposite.

"No. I'm fine." I smiled. "Thank you though."

This was so unlike me. I'd never wanted anyone as much as I wanted Grayson. Edward had been my first and only. The sex was good, at least by the standards of someone who had only slept with one guy. But looking back on our relationship from a different perspective, something was missing between us. I came to the conclusion that either Edward wasn't capable of giving it to me or he chose not to.

There was a strong connection—an intimacy-between Grayson and me that I never had with Edward. He was open and honest about everything. He's made me feel like I was actually being heard—without any judgment.

I'd been able to share any and everything with him. Even some things Tanya didn't know about. Grayson had become the friend who I feel completely comfortable with. He'd let me in on a part of him that I was never allowed access to with Edward.

"Anything for you, sweetheart." He smiled as he tangled his fingers with mine once.

"I have your drinks." The waitress' light voice grabbed our attention, breaking our stares at each other. She sat our non-alcoholic beverages down in front of us. "Have you all decided upon an appetizer yet, or would you like to order your main course?"

"Yes, we have," Grayson spoke up. "We'll have the jumbo shrimp cocktail to start with and for our entrée, we'll both have the slow-roasted prime rib."

"Excellent choice." The waitress nodded. "I'll be back shortly with your starter." She smiled warmly and walked away.

It was nice to have a female server that didn't flirt with your date.

The moment we were alone again, Grayson's focus was back on me. "Are you enjoying yourself so far?"

"Yes. How could I not? I'm with you."

His face lit up, as his smile reached his eyes. "Bee, I know I keep saying it, but I've missed you so much." He raised my hand and gently kissed the back of it. I quivered with his touch.

"I've missed you too. So much." I squeezed his hand.

"Baby, I don't know how we're going to do it. It's getting harder and harder each day not to be able to touch you. I'm almost ready to reach out to my counselor, Gwen, to see if I transferred would I still graduate in the spring." He looked sincere.

Just the thought of seeing him every day had my heart racing.

"Honey, as much as I'd love that" -I bit my bottom lip- "…I don't want you losing credits or having to push your graduation date back for me. You're almost finished. I doubt very seriously if that would be a smooth transition." I shook my head. "No, Gray, we'll figure something else out."

His countenance briefly fell, then his eyes widened. "When I get back home, I'm going to check to see if I can take my classes for next semester Monday through Thursday and have Fridays off. I already know the classes I need to take so that part is easy. I'll double-check with Gwen first thing Monday morning." His expression was determined.

My heart melted at his resourcefulness. He really wanted to spend time with me.

"I'll see if I can do the same thing too." I rubbed the back of his hand with my thumb. "We can take turns. I'll drive home on Thursday afternoons when I get out of class and then some Thursdays you can drive down here."

"I like that idea." He leaned in closer to me.

"Me too." I closed the gap between us and gave him a small peck on the lips, untangling my hand from his and running my fingers through his hair.

Just as I withdrew someone cleared their throat. "Excuse me, sir, ma'am." The young man's eyes bounced between the two of us, as he held a tray in his hand. "I have your shrimp with cocktail sauce." He looked amused.

I blushed finding the silverware on the table interesting and Grayson snorted. "Thank you." He jerked his chin toward the table. "You can set it down now."

"Very well," the waiter said as he placed the food down. "I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening." He smiled and quietly walked away.

Grayson clamped his lips together as his face turned red, as he tried to hold in his laughter from my embarrassment.

"Go ahead and let it out, you jerk." I threw my napkin at him and smirked. "That's the last time I'll kiss you in public."

He finally released his laugh. "I highly doubt that."

I rolled my eyes but stayed silent because I knew it wasn't a matter of if I kissed him again before we left but how many times… and he knew it.

He dipped a shrimp in the sauce and held it out to me with a wide, smug grin on his face. "Taste, my love."

I shook my head and smiled. Grayson could be so cocky at times, but I had to admit it, that was one of the many things I loved about him.

CCCCCCCCC

As we pulled up to the vintage red brick building with lavish travertine stairs, that seemed to go on for days, I admired the history of it from afar off. Surprisingly, Grayson managed to find a space right in front.

He slowly released my hand, that he'd held for the hundredth time tonight, to get out and open the door for me. He held his hand out to me and I slid mine hand in his. His touch had always felt warm and inviting to me.

Grayson held the door open for me, being the gentleman he was all the time, and my eyes immediately scanned the wall full of antique paintings. They were engaging and intriguing, with stories to tell by each stroke. He patiently waited as my eyes absorbed every new mural they could.

As we walked hand and hand down the hall toward the bank of elevators the black and white grand harlequin floor pattern went on for what seemed like miles.

He pushed the up arrow bottom and the doors immediately opened to an empty elevator. The soft classic music whispered in the background just loud enough to appreciate. Grayson pushed for the third-floor button with one hand, as his other hand wrapped around the small of my back.

He leaned over and placed a tender kiss on my shoulder. "Have I told you how lovely you look tonight, baby?" His expression was soft.

I turned, reached up, and circled my arms around his neck. "You've said it all night." I smiled.

He pulled me so close to him, there was no space between us, and rested both hands on my hips. "And I'm going to continue to say it." He softly ran his tongue across my lips. He knew I loved when he did that.

My lips parted as his hot breath blew on my face. He looked down at my lips as I looked up at his. Almost on cue, we met in the middle as our tongues tangled. The kiss was soft and sensual.

The elevator bell dinged, letting us know we had arrived at our floor. I pulled back with a smile not wanting a repeat performance like at the restaurant. Grayson pouted and kissed my nose before grabbing my hand and pulling me behind him.

Not many steps later we arrived in front of door numbered 333. He pulled a skeleton key out of his pants' pocket, unlocked the door, and gestured for me to go in first.

His room was breathtaking. Off-white paint and crown molding accented the walls, along with a huge king-size bed in the center of the room. The French-style furniture complimented the room nicely, with the floor-to-ceiling windows.

"Your room is beautiful, Gray." I smiled up at him.

"I know it may come across as cheesy, but it's nowhere near as beautiful as you are." He spoke with a soft tone.

My body was flooded with warmth. I reached up and cupped his face with both hands. "You always say the sweetest things to me."

He skimmed his index finger along my jawline. "I mean every word of it, Bee." I closed my eyes and savored his touch. "Bella…" His voice cracked a little.

I opened my eyes and found a pensive expression on his face. My eyebrows drew together. "Yes? What's wrong?"

My stomach felt tense.

"Nothing, baby." He shook his head, looking down and smiling. "I need to tell you something but I'm nervous."

A million different scenarios played out in my head all at once. Was our somewhat long-distance relationship too much for him and he wanted to break up with me? Had he met someone else at his school that he could spend time with every day? Was I carrying too much baggage from my other relationship, putting a strain on our relationship? Had his patience run out from us not having sex yet? Did he want to go back to being friends only?

I was annoyed with myself because of my jaded thoughts.

"Bella, sweetheart, what's wrong?" He leaned in while he moved closer to me.

I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"Bella?" He picked me up and sat on the edge of the bed with me across his lap. "Please, honey, tell me what's wrong?"

I nodded as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. "Are you…" I paused and decided to ask a different way. "What do you need to tell me?" I looked him directly in the eye despite feeling nauseated.

He squinted his eyes, searching my face. "Isabella Marie Swan, I don't know where that pretty little mind of yours just went but based upon the anxious look across your face, I don't like it."

He stood up, holding me bridal style, and kicked his shoes off. He gently laid me down on the bed and then he eased out of his sport coat. He kneeled down and reached for my right shoe, removing it as he looked at me asking permission with his eyes. He placed a delicate kiss on the bottom of my foot as he removed the left shoe.

I closed my eyes and relished in his touch yet again tonight. My body responded to him in ways it'd never done with anyone else. When I opened my eyes again, Grayson was on the bed, laying beside me. He scooted closer to me, grabbing my waist, turning me to my side, so I was facing him. We were nose to nose, without any space between us.

"Talk to me, Bee. Tell me where you just went. I haven't seen a look like that on your face since…" He stopped himself but I knew what he was going to say.

My lips pressed into a tight grimace and my shoulders slumped. I was disappointed with myself because I had allowed my past to taint my present.

Grayson was not Edward.

I promised myself I wouldn't do this.

I exhaled and shook my head. "I'm sorry," I murmured.

"Sorry for what?" He frowned as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I'm sorry for doubting you. I'm sorry for thinking you…"

"Sorry for thinking I…what?" he questioned.

The more I thought about it the more ashamed I felt for thinking it in the first place.

"Thinking you didn't want to be with me anymore. That I wasn't worth it, and I had too many issues."

He didn't say a word. He stared at me with a pained expression across his face, but the more hurtful thing was I'd put it there.

"Grayson, I am so sor—"

He cut me off by putting his finger on my lips. "Bella, I've wanted to be with you from the moment I laid eyes on you at that meeting. Before you, no one else mattered to me. It sounds harsh but it's true. You mean the world to me, baby." His eyes began to water. "I know that bastard put you through the wringer. You had every right to ask to take things slow between you and me. Frankly, if you didn't, I'd be concerned." He pressed his palm against my face. "I don't want any more one-night stands—going from girl to girl. I want it all with you and only you."

I smiled and closed my eyes.

"No, baby, I need you to open your eyes and look directly at me for what I'm about to say to you, okay?"

I opened my eyes and nodded in agreement.

"Bella, sweetheart, I've been scared as hell to tell you this because I cannot lose you. There is no me living without you. So, you can just get that shit out of your head right now. Do you hear me?"

"Yes." My eyes were shone with unshed tears, as I locked them with his.

"Okay, good." He kissed my forehead. "Now that we've established, I'm in this for the long haul, I want you to know… I love you, Bella." He hesitated seemingly giving me a moment to take in what he'd said. "I am in love with you. You're the first person I think of when I wake up and the last person I think of before I go to bed." Tears flowed down both of our faces.

"I know it may seem too fast for you and if you don't feel the same about me yet, that's okay. Bee, I've always been honest with you so I'm going to be honest with you now. I was in love with you while you were still with Edward." My mouth fell open. "Yeah, I know that's not one of my best moments, but I was willing to bite the bullet and keep it to myself just so I could keep you in my life, however I could." He used the pad of his thumb to wipe away some of my tears. "Baby, I love you so fucking much—so-called issues and all. You're my forever."

A smile spread across my face that couldn't be contained, as happy tears continued to roll down my face. His words let me know all the dreams-day and night-I had about us weren't crazy. He wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him.

He was in love with me just like I was in love with him.

A/N: Thank you for all of the reviews, follows and alerts.

Please leave a review. I would love to hear your thoughts on how Grayson and Bella's relationship is progressing. I know some of you all are Team Edward no matter what. LOL

If you would like to see some of the pictures from this chapter, please join our FB group: The Moon Writers

RECS: Tides of Fate by Sparking Twilight - Completed

Common Ground by Drotuno – WIP

The Way I Wanted it by Iambeagle – WIP

All three of these stories are PHENOMENAL!