Disclaimer:
I do not own the story and the concepts represented in the fiction written. This fiction and all Persona related fictions belong to Atlus, the fantastic company that created the games.
Author's Note:
Hey everyone,
I just want to thank you all who took the time to read this story even after I didn't update in so long. As you can imagine, life is strange nowadays. I'm living overseas for a job assignment, so it's been difficult trying to manage school, work, and creative writing. Fortunately, I am done with school, and work is easing up a lot. My days now consist of a lot of gym and work. Naturally, I have significantly more time to work on this story, too. I already have the outlines for the next (4) updates, so it shouldn't take me another five months to post. Also, I went back to every other chapter and edited them for grammar. It should be a much smoother read now.
Lastly, I am experimenting with my writing and trying out new things. Please leave a comment on what you guys think!
Comments to Reviews:
Emagame99: I like your name! Also, I don't plan on dropping this story. It is a personal challenge to finish it before I move on to something else I'd like to work on.
Naoto Koizumi: Thank you so much for the review. I'm glad you are enjoying the story, and I like the points you bring up. Yes, the questions you have will be answered. I have to restrain myself from sharing too much, I tend to do that, so it remains a surprise.
LuckyXlll: Thanks for your feedback. I really try to make the characters feel alive and driven by realistic motivations. I'm a firm believer in story's that capture emotional thought process of characters.
Erelia: Guys will be guys. I should know! And Haru is such a cinnamon roll, and I do enjoy writing about her and her resilience.
prince of underbrush: I love your comment on Akira. Sadly, our young man is...a young man!
KingPlotBunny: Hey, I don't blame Akira. The female confidants in P5 are hot! On the threeway, maybe...though, I think Haru would pull out her axe if Akira ever asks for one. It is a fifty-fifty chance on that one!
Before
6/26
Inhale, then exhale, Haru reminds herself. The strain on her body is temporarily relieved with each intake of air. Haru's eyes dart to the monitor that displays her heartbeat, distance, speed, and time. The treadmill is set on level six, a good challenge since it is a thirty-minute run.
Makoto Niijima is a majestic creature, running on level nine without any sign of strain or fatigue. Her eyes are determined, and her face impassive as she glides on the machine like an ice skater over a frozen lake. Against her mild temperament, Haru wants to berate her running companion on the adjacent treadmill.
Haru feels her limits are being reached. The strain throughout her body is becoming too obtrusive to ignore, especially around her chest, which she secured with two sports bras.
When she feels ready to fall on her face, the monitor beeps nosily, and the belt underneath her begins to slow down. After an eternity, the workout is over, and Haru can catch her breath.
Gripping the sides of the machine, Haru glances at her workout partner and smiles. Her face is covered in sweat and strands of her hair. Her legs are jelly, and her chest feels like it's on fire. None of that, however, dampens the surge of accomplishment bubbling in her gut.
Like she expects, Makoto is unfazed, rolling her shoulders and matching the belt's steadily decreasing speed with ease.
"That was a good warm-up," Makoto says.
Haru's face falls. "W-warm up?"
"Yes. After this, we have lunges, squats, push-ups, weights, and some light Aikido sparring."
Haru sincerely regrets her decision to join Makoto on her exercise plan in the following workouts. It isn't until they transition from legs to arms (push-ups) that Haru feels confident she isn't crumbling. Even her form is perfect, which Makoto mentions many people don't get right. Surprising herself, and perhaps Makoto, Haru completes her three-set of twenty push-ups efficiently.
"Thank you," says Haru, blushing at the praise. "I think it's because of all the garden work I do at my house."
"Really?" Makoto says. "I never realized that gardening work could be so demanding."
"Yes, it probably has more to do with the ax I use to cut firewood than anything else."
Makoto blinks, looking at Haru for a moment in confusion before nodding. "That is more strenuous than I imagined."
The two progress to lifting weights, bicep curls, as Makoto calls it, and Haru is surprised by the burn traveling up her arm. It reminds her of how swinging her ax leaves a pleasant soreness in her muscles. After completing three sets, Makoto directs Haru to the elevated square ring surrounded by sturdy red ropes.
"Here," Makoto says, " is where we finish the workout with some Aikido practices."
She retrieves a pair of training gloves for Haru, then dons circular mitts on her hands.
"We'll be working on strikes and thursts for today. Once you feel comfortable with that, we'll work on grabs another day."
Haru gulps as Makoto adopts a ready stance with her dominant foot back, front leg bent slightly, and mittened hands covering her face like a shield. It is her eyes and the ferociousness in them that startles Haru the most, though. Her friend looks ready for war.
"Are you ready?" Makoto asks.
"Ah, y-yes!"
Haru's first strikes and thrusts are awkward, off-balanced, and lacking in power. Fortunately, Makoto is a capable instructor. The two swap positions every few minutes, and Makoto corrects Haru's stance and movements. Slowly, Makoto's patience lessens Haru's anxiousness, and Haru builds more confidence. Each strike and thurst becomes more natural. Soon Haru is so enthralled in the experience that she barely hears Makoto calling her name.
"Haru!"
Haru blinks, forcing her outstretched fist to freeze, and stares at Makoto.
"We're done with the workout," says Makoto, smiling.
"Oh…" Haru lowers her hands. "I…apologize. You were calling my name, weren't you?"
"It's no problem," says Makoto. "You were getting into the flow of things. And, I admit that I can get that way, too. Sometimes hitting something is the best stress relief."
Stress relief, Haru thinks. It suddenly occurs to her why hefting her ax and cutting firewood is one of her favorite pastimes. It is physically demanding in a way that requires her full attention and empties her mind of trivial matters. That, or she secretly takes pleasure in violence. Though, Haru imagines it is the former.
As they collect and secure Makoto's equipment, Haru observes Makoto. Not only is she noticeably less fatigued than Haru, but there is a glow to her, something intangible that is awe-inspiring.
"Makoto," says Haru, handing her the gloves.
Makoto takes the gloves and organizes them in her duffel bag. "Yes?"
"This may sound strange, but I notice that you are…glowing?"
Makoto stops in her task and turns to Haru. "Glowing?"
Embarrassment creeps up Haru's face like fire as she explains. "Well, I notice that you seem different. More radiant and…happy and less restrained."
"Less restrained," Makoto repeats slowly. Makoto turns away and looks at the floor. Her gaze is intense, but she isn't focusing on anything. Instead, she is somewhere else, reliving a memory in minute detail. Haru observes multiple expressions flash across Makoto's face until only determination remains. If possible, Makoto appears even more radiant.
"Recently, I've figured out that there's something I have to do." Makoto heaves the duffel over her and turns toward Haru, radiating the power and confidence of royalty. Almost like a queen.
"Now that I have this responsibility, I must ensure I measure up."
Makoto never elaborates on her new responsibility, and Haru doesn't pry. They conclude their workout with a series of stretches that Makoto directs. Afterward, they venture to the female locker room. Haru is satisfied to remove her sweaty gym clothes and ease her sore muscles with a hot shower.
She feels better when she exits the Protein Lovers Gym onto Central Street, wearing a greenish white-collar dress underneath the white tank top and white pantyhose. Her hair is tied in a ponytail to compensate for the recent heat waves afflicting Tokyo, and her maroon gym bag rests loosely over her shoulder.
Alongside Haru, Makoto exits the establishment in a white blouse with a black belt, capris leggings, and low-heeled shoes, shouldering her duffel bag filled with sparring equipment.
"Hm, what else should we do today?" Haru asks.
Makoto pockets her cell phone. "It's still early, and I don't have to be home for a while. Are you feeling hungry?"
"Something to eat sounds wonderful. What is there around? I'm not too familiar with the cuisine in this area?"
"Ok, I'm in the mood for something…savory. How about you?"
"Really anything, except …"
Makoto arches an eyebrow. "Except?"
"Not Big Bang Burger," Haru sighs.
Makoto laughs. "Of course!"
As the twosome maneuver through the busy street, Makoto points out the various options available for food.
"There's some snack stores in the Underground Shopping Mall, the ramen place, or the diner. Also…oh!"
Makoto stops abruptly and waves to a relatively tall young woman with her wavy platinum blonde hair styled in bushy pigtails. Haru squints at the figure. The young woman seems familiar, something in Haru's mind tells her that she is, but Haru can't grasp anything concrete.
Then, as the young woman approaches, the memory falls into place, and shame bubbles up Haru's chest.
Months ago, Haru remembers that this beautiful young woman, a blond man, and Akira conversed on the school's rooftop. What they talked about, Haru can't recall. Instead, Haru remembers her feeling when the young woman was near Akira and Haru's offensive outburst for them to leave. She had apologized to Akira but never to this stunning young woman or the gruff-looking young man, which had bothered her for weeks afterward. Anxiety fills her stomach as she readies herself for the young woman's approach.
"Makoto, hey! What are you doing here?"
"Hi, Ann. I just got done with my daily workout."
"Argh, that sounds rough."
Makoto laughs. "You could've joined us. Haru and I just finished, and it went great."
"Haru?" For the first time, the stunning blond turns her attention to Haru. Her bright blue eyes are magnetizing.
"Yeah," says Makoto, gesturing toward Haru. "Have you two met before?"
Before Ann can respond, Haru bows her head. "I'm sorry."
Even without looking at Ann, Haru can feel her surprise. Makoto is probably similarly confused. Nonetheless, Haru remains bowed slightly.
"Whoa…um, sorry? Wait, did I do something wrong?" Ann wonders.
"No, of course not! I'm apologizing because of how I acted when we first met."
When Ann does not show any signs of understanding, Haru explains. "It was maybe, two months ago when you, Akira, and an ashen-haired young man ventured to the school roof. Very rudely, I asked you all to leave. I should've been more polite and explanatory in my demand."
Understanding dons in Ann's eyes and the young woman plants her fist in her outstretched palm. "Oh, yeah! I remember…that was a while ago."
"Yes, it was. Nonetheless, the way I addressed you three was unacceptable, and I am sincerely remorseful for my demeanor."
Ann waves her hands wildly. "No, no, you don't have to apologize. We were trespassing in your club. The blond guy, Ryuji, was too close to one of the plants up there. I even warned him, but he didn't listen."
Ann blinks when she realizes that she has trailed off. "Anyway, please, I should apologize for being there. You're Akira's mentor, so it's all cool."
"Akira's mentor?" Makoto comments.
Haru feels her insides freeze. Makoto has been spying on Akira for the last few months. Not that Makoto knew that Haru knew that. Makoto is also unaware that Haru first approached her because Makoto was spying on Akira. After becoming friends, Haru kept the mentorship a secret from Makoto because she wasn't sure how Makoto would react.
Now, with the truth – or the partial truth — revealed, Haru is unsure how her friend will react. Glancing in Makoto's direction, Haru sees Makoto's surprise, which, in turn, surprises Haru because of Makoto's lack of anything other than shock.
The ruby-eyed young woman stares at Haru. "I didn't know you knew Akira, too. And, what is this about a mentorship?"
"Yes," says Haru, suppressing her hesitation. "When he first transferred to Shujin, I was his mentor. As his mentor, I monitor his grades and general conduct, so he doesn't get into trouble."
Makoto appears bemused by the entire concept. Placing a hand under her chin, she says, "So, a program where you take a troubled student under your wing. I didn't know Shujin offered such a program."
"I believe it was established for Akira's sake."
"Too bad," says Makoto. "I could be your mentor, Ann."
"What? No, thank you. You'd probably make me study all the time." Ann's eyes widen. "Wait, are you calling me a troubled student?! Ryuji fits that bill a lot more than I do!"
The trio burst into laughter at the idea. Though Haru had only seen the blond-young man once, he did appear in need of guidance.
"So, what are you guys up to?" Ann asks.
"We're looking for someplace to eat after our workout," says Makoto.
"Really! We should totally get ice cream then!"
Makoto shakes her head. "Ann, that defeats the purpose of working out if Haru and I eat the calories we just burned. How about the diner instead"
Ann deflates, then she perks up and says, "They have the best strawberry crepes over there! I'm down."
"Of course, you want sweets," Makoto says, shaking her head.
The trio walks alongside each other through the busy street to their destination: the Shibuya Diner. As they chat, Haru notices that not only is Ann beautiful and optimistic, but the manner she carries herself is captivating, like a dancer who's practiced for years.
The trio enters the diner. The waitress scribbles down their drinks and then hands them menus before departing. Ann sits across from Haru and Makoto and waves at the waitress, who acknowledges her with a friendly smile.
"So, Ann," says Makoto as they enter the diner, "what have you been doing all day?"
Ann slumps forward, signing dramatically. "I just finished with a photo shoot a few hours ago. Argh!" Ann reaches for her drink, a chocolate milkshake, and inhales a portion of it in one gulp. "It was so frustrating! I went home afterward since it didn't go well, but I couldn't keep my mind off it. So, I decided to distract myself, and here I am!"
In contrast to Ann, Makoto calmly sips her drink. Haru does the same, frowning sympathetically at Ann. From what she gathers, Ann is a model of some sort. If it is anything as tiring as maintaining appearances at her father's social events, Haru can relate a little too well.
"I'm sorry to hear that," Haru says. "Though not similar, Takamaki-san, I know what it's like to have to act in a certain way that's not you."
"Yeah!" Ann agrees vigorously. "There's that, too. Also, call me Ann. Takamaki is my mom."
"Ok, but only if you call me Haru."
"Agreed!" Ann sticks out her hand for Haru to shake, and the two smile as if trading secrets.
As the waitress returns, Haru realizes that she has not spared the menu a glance. Ann and Makoto, however, seem to have their orders in mind. Ann orders strawberry crepes as promised, while Makoto orders a lunch sandwich with fruit. Not wanting to keep the waitress waiting, Haru picks the same order as Makoto.
"Anyways," Ann says, recounting her morning, "if it weren't for Akira with me, I don't think I could've handled today."
Haru's chest tightens for reasons other than her empty stomach.
"I can only imagine," Makoto adds. "He is always such a calming presence."
"I know, right? Like, imagine if it were Ryuji or Yusuke? Yusuke would disappear to draw, probably, and Ryuji – Ryuji would somehow make me even more anxious!"
Makoto says something, laughing, but Haru can't make out the words. Her eyes focus on her drink while she tries to dislodge the tension in her chest. When no solution or mantra works, she tries distraction.
"Ann, what is it like to model?"
The young woman inhales another mouthful of her milkshake and smiles. "Ooh, yah! I -ove it!"
"Ann," says Makoto, a warning in her tone.
Ann straightens, shallowing the drink in her mouth, and smiles warily. "Sorry, sorry. Anyways, I love it! It does sometimes suck, keeping up appearances and whatnot, but it's a challenge, gives me something to do, and…it's meaningful to me."
At that moment, Haru sees the same bright and awe-inspiring glow on Ann that Makoto possessed.
"Meaningful?" Haru questions.
Ann's eyes shine further in her enthusiasm. She passionately explains her career, sparing no details about its annoyances and the joys and excitement associated with it. Hearing her, Haru realizes that Ann and Makoto are driven by something overpowering, some grand purpose. Haru also admits that she lacks something similar. After finishing their meals and paying, the trio departs and explores Central Street.
They spend their time conversing, window shopping, and planning for future ventures. At Ann's insistence, they purchase ice cream to combat the overbearing heat. Slowly, the temperature drops slightly as the sun disappears over the horizon and skyscrapers. Ann is the first to depart, leaving Makto and Haru.
"She sure is full of energy," comments Makoto.
"Yes," agrees Haru. "But, I think it's part of her charm."
The two chuckle goodheartedly.
"I have to leave soon. Gym, next Sunday, too?"
Haru smiles and nods, not trusting herself to not wince out loud.
"Good." Makoto waves before departing, too.
Alone, Haru makes her way to the street to call for someone to pick her up. Navigating through her smartphone, she is unprepared when she crashes into someone.
Haru yelps. "Akio-san?"
"Madam?"
Haru stares. It is strange to see Akio-san in anything but her work uniform. However, today, she dons a loose-fitted blue blouse, form-fitting jeans, and brown pumps. Her hair is tied in a ponytail that compliments her attire, and in her hands are multiple shopping bags.
"Akio-san, what are you doing here?" Haru asks.
The head maid smiles, adjusting her grip on her bags. "Your father dismissed me early today, saying he wanted privacy when his associates arrived. As I am tasked with staying tonight, I am taking care of some personal errands."
Before she can stop herself, Haru unceremoniously blurts, "Personal errands?"
Akio-san, fortunately, takes no offense. "Yes, it is something significant to me."
"Significant," repeats Haru. "As in…purposeful?"
Akio-san blinks. "Yes, it is purposeful…Haru?"
It is Haru's turn to blink. Akio-san rarely calls her by her name. "Yes?"
Akio-san holds out her hands, gripping the shopping bags. "These aren't heavy, but, nonetheless, can you help me?"
Haru's eyes widen. "Oh, yes, of course! I'm sorry, I've been…thinking a lot today."
The head maid laughs softly. "I can see that. Haru, would you like to accompany me if you have time?"
"Of course, Akio-san. Where do you want to go?"
"Well, it is a little ways away, but follow me. There's something I'd like you to see."
Without question, Haru follows Akio-san to the train station. On the way to their destination, they chat – Haru detailing her time at the gym and then the diner with Ann and Makoto. Akio-san, astute as ever, picks up on Haru's unease when she mentions the diner but choices not to comment.
The duo exit the station on Chiyoda, somewhere Haru is unfamiliar with, and walks to a church. At the entrance, Haru sees five children of various ages, a middle-aged man in a black clergy uniform and an elderly woman leaning on a cane for support. One of the children, a girl with warm brown eyes and her black hair tied in pigtails, stands close to the elderly woman, watching over her protectively.
Upon noticing Akio-san, the children, even the little girl watching over the elderly woman, broke into smiles and happiness. "Aki! Aki! Aki!"
They all cheer, circling around Akio-san, and talk all at once, telling her about their day. Somehow, even with the voices and demand for attention, Akio-san manages to address each of them affectionately.
"Hello, Akane! You're looking pretty today, Fumi. Hiroto, Hiroshi, when I speak with Kazuo-san, I have better hear you two behaved. And, Ren, stop being shy and hugging my leg!"
Akio-san drops the bags in her hands and encourages Haru to do the same. She instructs each child to take two and take them inside. Haru watches them go, vibrant and so alive. Then, she looks at Akio-san and feels her chest swell. Akio-san is radiant; a brightness surrounds her that is almost blinding. In her eyes, Haru sees a sense of purpose similar to Ann and Makoto.
And at that moment, Haru realizes what has troubled her all day. No, she admits, it has always bothered her but has never surfaced until now. Haru grasps the lack of purpose in her life.