A/N: Enjoy this chapter if you will :)

I don't own Kodocha or any of its contents.

Chapter 13: Puzzle Piecing

Sana ran, her breath labored and heavy. In her sprint, despite the burning in her chest, and the ache in her leg muscles, she could only think about the despair Ayame's brown eyes. The worry that crossed Tsuyoshi's face, and the anger that boiled in Fuka.

Akito's dull, golden eyes came into her mind. He was angry, and spiteful. If the world burned, she didn't think he would really care.

But, despite the anger in his eyes, Sana knew that there had to be more.

Hayama may be a silent individual, and he may keep his emotions to himself. But that didn't mean that he wasn't feeling on the inside. Having all these feelings and nowhere to put them but bottle them inside ate up a person. It drove you insane. It was too much for one person to handle sometimes.

Both Tsuyoshi and Ayame had filled her in, told her that their father had come back into their life. But, apparently, Hayama and his father had a very tense relationship.

To hell if he didn't want help.

Sana wouldn't let Hayama drown in the abyss that he created for himself.

She didn't know him. She didn't understand him too well. He was closed off, and such a pompous jerk. He didn't care for anyone and pushed all those away from him that even tried to care about him.

But, Sana didn't want to miss out on the chance to get to know the real Hayama Akito. She had just made a resolve to get to know him better. To hell if she was letting that go to waste tonight.

Tsuyoshi had given her the directions to their secret place.

Apparently some type of hiding spot.

That thought almost made her giggle.

Hayama having a hiding spot? That was such a trivial thing when it came to the blond. According to Tsuyoshi, it was some abandoned shack house that they had found when they were kids over by the closes park. It was hidden and it was theirs. When they were kids, it was where they always hung out, but as they got older, it became a safe haven.

And apparently, it was where Hayama had taken refuge.

Following the trail, Sana stumbled upon the shack. It wasn't too small, but not big enough to be noticed either. She could see a light shining through the slits of the door and the open windows. Someone was in there.

When she creeped over, Sana peeped into the window only to see the boy in question sitting down on the floor with his head in his hands.

She frowned.

Something was up. And it was time to find out what was going on with him. But, how to approach this situation? She put a finger to her chin.

Well, she was always rather good at making grand entrances.

There was another window, on the other side, closer to him. If she crept up to him that way…

She made her way to the other side, cursing to herself when some of the branches of the trees that dangled got stuck in her hair. Finally coming up from the other side, he was definitely closer. Close enough to hear her.

"Found ya."

Immediately, he jumped. His eyes went wide, scanning the room for her voice. She giggled, and his eyes found hers. Hayama frowned almost instantly.

"I'm going to kill him." He muttered and she rolled her eyes. "I'm going to kill him for even telling you about this place." Sana used this opportunity to jump through the broken window and land inside with an easy thump.

"You will do no such thing! He was just worried about you… We all have been. Fuka's been on a war path." Hayama didn't respond and she sighed.

"Just leave me alone and forget you saw me here."

"Sorry. No can do!"

"Why are you even here?"

"Your sister is worried sick. Tsuyoshi thinks you've gone off the deep end. And Fuka can't think clearly."

"So what? You're here in their place?" His words were harsh and full of spite.

"Something like that… but I'm also worried as well. Hayama, you can't just disappear the way you did."

She bit her lip and something lit up in him as he turned his head so fast. His golden eyes were blazing with an uncontrollable anger. She hadn't seen him like this before. It almost scared her.

"Shut the hell up! You don't get to sit there and tell me what I can and can't do. You don't even know me! We just met and you think you can sit there and talk to me about what I'm not allowed to do? You stupid, idiotic, naïve little girl and your optimistic thinking. Leave. I don't want to see you here."

Her heart fell, not taking his insults and harsh words to heart.

"I want to help. Tell me what it is I need to do to help you."

"You really wanna help, huh?" He narrowed his eyes.

"Yes. I will do what I can." Sana squared her shoulders and Hayama stood up. He towered over her very easily. Her eyes were trained up to match his.

"Then kill me."

The air went thick.

"Wh-what?" She couldn't breathe. What in the world was he asking?!

"Kill me. End my life right here, right now. It doesn't matter if I continue moving forward because there is nothing left for me here."

Sana could feel the tears sting at her eyes as Hayama stared at her with eyes void of emotion. Dull, golden eyes that seemed to fade away to black. When she looked down, her eyes went even wider. In his hand, was a knife.

She sucked in a breath.

"You said you will do what you can, didn't you? So kill me."

Sana couldn't breathe. Her chest felt heavy as he urged her to kill him as he stuck the knife in her face. So hollow were his cheeks and tired were his eyes. Hayama Akito was nothing more than an empty shell.

Furrowing her eyebrows, she snatched away the knife from his hand and held it tight in her hand. He didn't even flinch.

"Kill you!? How can you ask me such thing!? And don't you know how dangerous those things are! You can't go around carrying things like that around!"

He frowned. "Didn't you say you would do anything? Now you're a liar."

She couldn't help it anymore. She blinked and the tears began to build at the rims of her eyes. "I won't kill you, you idiot!" She had to do all she could to keep herself from croaking.

He didn't respond as he looked at her with the same, tired eyes.

Her heart was hurting so much for him. She didn't realize how dark and twisted Hayama was from the time she met him. Inside, no matter what stoic façade he put together, he was suffering. Suffering to the point that he was wanting to kill himself. Because to him, there was no other way out but this.

"This is exactly what pisses me off about you. You think the world is so damn hunky dory and that everything will be alright if you stick your nose in it. You don't get it and you never will. So stop trying to understand because someone like you will never understand how I feel!"

In a flash, Sana stabbed the knife in the trunk of the tree behind him. She hid her eyes under her bangs as the tears she tried so hard to keep inside ran down her face.

Idiot…

She understood more than anyone.

Sana was shaking and she couldn't stop. She could feel his pain, feel his anger. It resonated with her all too similarly. It was bringing emotions and feelings back that she didn't want to relive. Swallowing it down, Sana refused to let the void consumer her again.

Not when there was someone who was suffering from the demons of his past.

Someone who was so far deep that they resulted to killing themselves.

"You're such an idiot." She whispered. Slowly, she pulled herself away from her bangs and looked at Hayama with tears freely falling away.

At that moment, if only for a moment, his own golden irises went wide, surprised at the tears that kissed her cheeks. For this was first time that he had seen her so vulnerable and weak.

"Asking me to kill you…" she dug the knife further into the bark. "Do you have any idea the pain you would leave behind if you did that?"

"You selfish jerk." A raised brow. "You stupid, stupid idiot!" Her hand slipped from the knife and she hid her eyes in her bangs, but the streams of tears on her cheeks were hard to miss. "You think so low of yourself that you think no one would bat an eye of your death?"

Yeah, yeah I do.

"So, then what? That's that? I kill you and you think you'll be happy? What about Fuka? Tsuyoshi? Your sister? Me?" And there went his eyes again as she glared at him with angry hazel eyes that darkened under her bangs. The tears were still spilling over the rims. But, the sadness that loomed over her eyes remained.

Why… why did she care? They were hardly friends! Why was she crying for him? Why was she looking so… sad? Why didn't she just let him be? Why did it look like she had been here before...? Did she know what it felt like to hate yourself so much that you want to die?

No.

Someone like her wouldn't have a clue.

He just stared at her while she glared harshly at him with red, glaring eyes. The tears weren't ending and she was gripping her fists so tightly they were turning white. That glare was obnoxious, almost condescending.

How dare you try to end your life? How dare you ask me this? He could already hear the questions being asked in her voice. Well, she asked didn't she?! She asked what she could do for him? Stupid girl. If she didn't want to hear his answer, she should have never asked.

Akito was expecting a backlash, an abruption with anger and yelling and her loud, shrieking. Another lecture, another wave of "reasoning." Instead, he was met with a sad gaze as her eyes dropped the glare and she looked at him with pensive, somber eyes. There was a cloud that shadowed over her hazel eyes. And Akito couldn't understand it. Was it vulnerability from her end? Was she trying to connect with him on something she wouldn't even come close to understanding?

Was she pitying him?

He hated pity. When Tsuyoshi and Aya had found out about the accident, about the death of his mother, his best friend walked on egg shells. It was like walking on glass whenever he was around. Tsuyoshi avoided the topic, always bringing up another conversation. Aya refused to look him in the eye, biting her lip like she always did when she was nervous.

All he wanted was for them to stop looking at him like he would break at any second.

Are you okay?

The only question he needed asked, but never bothered prying for.

Because he was strong, right? He didn't need anyone. Especially after killing his mom.

"Hayama…" She whispered and in a matter of seconds, her arms reached out to wrap around him.

His eyes went wide as he stiffened immediately under her touch. She embraced him, wrapping her arms tightly around him as she buried her head in his shoulder. He could feel Sana's tears through his shirt. They were silent tears, but every drop felt so heavy.

Akito couldn't breathe.

His arms refused to move, his eyes still wide.

Why was she hugging him? Who gave her permission to hug him? Why did this stupid, moronic, naïve girl who didn't know a damn thing about him think it was okay to just do as she pleased? Say as she pleased? Why was she poking her head into business that didn't concern her?

The blond felt Kurata lift her head and put her chin on his shoulder.

"Has anyone ever bothered asking you if you were okay?"

His knees buckled immediately and there was an immediate frog in his throat. His heart began to speed, and his mind swirled.

She pulled away, but Kurata's hands were still on his shoulders as she looked at him with eyes he couldn't read. She was starting right at him.

Keep the façade.

Don't let anyone see.

Be a wall.

Don't let anyone in.

"Hayama… Akito…." He sucked in a breath immediately as she stared at him with concerned eyes.

She didn't even know his story, why he was fucked up the way he was. She didn't know that he killed his mom, or that he was the reason Ayame was so fuckin scared of everything around her, or that the lack of parental guardian in their life was from him driving their pathetic excuse of a father away.

Not bothering to reply, Akito's jaw clenched tighter, to the point that there was a pain in the tightening of his muscles. As frozen as a statue, as frozen as his heart, Akito made no point to answer to her statement, even if she did use his full name.

And she did it again.

She embraced him, the hug growing tighter by the second.

"Are you okay?" It was a soft whisper, barely audible. But, it was enough for him to hear. His knees buckled again, and this time, he couldn't keep himself up.

Hayama fell to his knees and Sana right alongside him. She kept her arms wrapped around his neck, tighter and they hit the floor with a hard thump. Once stiffened, his body relaxed and his arms lazed at his sides.

His mind was racing with so many thoughts.

Why her?

Why did this girl, who barely knew him, nonetheless, understood him, reach out to him like this? Why did this girl, who had no ties, no obligation to help him, bother running after him? They weren't friends, they hardly knew one another. If it wasn't for that stupid project, they probably wouldn't even be in this position.

Akito couldn't muster up an answer. The words refused to fuse together. The frog in his throat growing bigger, tighter. He couldn't breathe.

"You don't have to answer. You don't have to say anything." Her frame against his made him realize just how much smaller, thinner she was than him. The words she said were used to soothe him, soothe him of his hidden pain.

Slowly, his eyes fell. From that wide, guarded stance, to one of utter defeat. He let his golden irises fall after standing so tiredly all this time. The bags never felt so heavy, his eyes wanting to close so desperately.

"I can't begin to understand that I know what you're feeling. That's insulting you and your pain, the hardships you've faced." She whispered into his ear. "But, I want to understand. I want to know who you are, Hayama Akito."

Why?

"I want us to be friends. I want us to be able to lean on one another and share the memories we create. Whether good or bad, I want to be able to share all those experiences with you. And if you're wanting to die…" her words died at that moment, and she hugged harder, "I can't do that." That last sentence came out in a low whisper that her breathe tickled his ear.

"So, please don't ask me to kill you. Or anyone. Because you need to live, Akito. Live for your sister, for your friends, for yourself. Because you are important. So important."

Her hands were soft. She was warm as she pressed herself against him. She was perfectly aligned with his body stature. Akito could feel her shoulders prodding into him, but it hardly caused him pain. All the blond could focus on was the auburn hair that engulfed his nostrils and the scent of her hair.

Did… did it always smell this nice?

Akito didn't know how long the two stood on their knees like this, or how long Kurata had buried her head in his shoulder, or even how long they sat in silence. His body, which was once as stiff as a board, finally allowed itself to relax and his shoulders fell and collectively, he and Sana both fell on their ass, hitting the floor again with a hard thump.

"Oww…" He could hear her mutter. The blond didn't bother looking up as his eyes stared directly at the floor of his hide out.

"Hayama?" Kurata called out to him, and he slowly raised his eyes to match with hers. Gone were the heavy tears, there was little evidence of her ever crying. She looked tired if anything.

How do you even respond after what just transpired? Especially when you were nothing but a complete asshole? He didn't know which way to go from here. Part of him wanted to continue hating her; to continue hating her because she stuck her nose where it didn't belong, because she pulled out a side of him that she shouldn't have seen. Another part of him wanted to… thank her.

"Hey… you in there?" She was waving an obnoxious hand in front of him. His hand reached for it and gripped her wrist, catching the auburn teen by surprise. Kurata's eyes went wide, but they returned to normal once she realized what was going on.

Say something… anything…

"My mom died in a car accident two years ago."

Her eyes went wide again. He let go of her hand. Slowly, Sana took her hand back. She didn't say a word, didn't respond. Sana listened and absorbed. After trying so hard to reach out to him, to get him to open up, she finally was able to earn his trust.

Because here he was, letting himself be vulnerable to her.

"After that, everything just… went to hell."

Sana wanted to press for more. But she knew she shouldn't be greedy. Just the fact that he was opening himself up now was enough for her. The auburn haired teen wanted to reach for that hand, hold it tightly for support.

"Everything is different now." Akito reached his hand behind his neck and rubbed it nervously. His golden eyes were unreadable and his body was hunched over, almost like he was shielding himself.

Even though he always stood tall and proud, Sana always felt like he had a defensive wall around him. Now, it was just in a more physical form, hunching away from her, moving his shoulders in so his body was protected. His eyes were so guarded, and his heart locked away.

"… I'm sorry about your mom." Hayama didn't answer and he continued staring at the floor like it was the most interesting thing on this planet.

She wanted to know more. She was eager to learn the entirety of the story, why it happened, who caused it, what was the aftermath. The more she knew, the better she could attempt to understand.

"Nothing to be sorry for. It wasn't your fault." The blond retreated further into his shield. He was protecting himself now. Sana didn't know him the best, but there was a control in his voice that she feared he practiced one too many times.

Biting down on her lip, Sana's eyes wondered over to the hand resting on his knee. Pale white as he clutched fiercely to the fabric of his jeans, she reached out and covered his with hers. He stiffened immediately. She almost pulled away.

His jaw line tightened. How was it that he was so far removed from physical touch? In times of vulnerability and weakness, the simplest of touch would warrant for more. Whenever she was struggling with her problems or with emotional turmoil, a single embrace from her mother left her aching for more. Silly to say, but her problems would melt away, even just for a short time. The comfort would allow her time to think clearly, find a solution to her problem, or at least, give her some time to run away from it for a little longer.

But Hayama… it was almost like he strayed away. His stiffened figure and need to avoid physical contact had alienated him. Sana wasn't sure how he dealt with the cards stacked against him, but it didn't seem healthy. His instinct to push those away close to him and deject himself from the world was causing more harm than good to him and the people around him.

She would know.

But Sana refused to let him be alone. Now and ever.

To hell if he tried to push her away.

So the auburn teen tightened her grip on his hand. He didn't respond and merely kept his gaze on the floor. Akito refused to make eye contact with her, and she wished he would. But, it was probably his pride that kept him from opening up fully.

But, she got this far, didn't she?

That was a good first step for them.

"I know that we haven't exactly seen eye to eye, and we've hardly even gotten along. But, I would like to consider us friends." She stated and his golden irises flickered to her. There was that ice wall that clouded over his true emotions.

She smiled. "I'm kind of annoying, I know. And I stick my nose in a lot of places it doesn't belong. I'm also kind of a free spirit and go with the flow of things. I can be over rambunctious, and I have a tendency to do the opposite of what I'm told. I don't like being told I can't do something, and I'm not very good at leaving people behind."

Hayama snorted, rolling his eyes and Sana shot him a short glare. But, nonetheless, she continued.

"But, if you will, I would like to be your friend Hayama Akito."

He remained silent, and it made her heart race slightly. Sana couldn't read him, what he was thinking. It was always easy to read others, and tell what they were thinking. She had gotten quite good at it too. But, he was different. The blond was impressively good at hiding his feelings.

Hayama shifted his gaze towards her again and she smiled, her hand still covering his. His eyes flickered down to their connected hands and then back to her.

"You aren't kind of annoying." Raising a brow, Sana opened her mouth until she was cut off. "You are really annoying."

What the hell…?! The jerk! Why I out of - !

"But okay."

She stopped her thoughts midway as he accepted her friend invitation. The bubbling in her stomach made her heart race and a grin lit up her face. There was a happiness that exploded inside of her as the words rang in her mind. Her eyes were shining so bright that it was almost blinding. Even if he wasn't jumping off the walls about it, he finally accepted her friendship. Tsuyoshi had always babbled on about how he was satisfied with living a lonely life and having no friends.

But, here was the golden opportunity to change that outlook on his life. She was granted another chance to get it right this time.

"Really?!" She jumped up, both surprising and shocking him. Sana's face was practically split in half by the grin that she couldn't repress. Jumping up and down, she couldn't help but yelp in place.

"Why are you going off like that? You got a loose screw or something? Sit down before you knock this damn place over, would you?" Hayama insulted, but Sana brushed off his comment. She giggled again as she sat down on her knees with her hands fisted on top. He rolled his eyes.

And just like that, the tension was broken.

"Ara, ara sorry. I get jumpy when I'm excited over something!" She rubbed the back of her head in embarrassment and he snorted again.

"You're beyond weird." He muttered and she just smiled.

"Well, this weirdo is your friend now! So get used to it!" Frantically standing up, she pointed at herself with a proud grin. Hayama shook his head as he also stood himself up.

They stood in silence for a moment before sharing a brief look. Hayama eyed her suspiciously, but she just grinned. She wasn't sure where they would go from here, but it had to be up. Things couldn't get worse than where they were only a few hours ago.

He eyed her carefully. And then sighed. "Let's go."

She nodded with much vigor. "After you!"

Sana watched as he rolled his eyes again and both teenagers left Hayama's not so secret hide out (well, at least from Sana). They made their way back onto the side walk after walking through some shrub, the sound of the city filling their ears.

Stretching out her sore muscles, Sana groaned. It was late, but fortunately, her home wasn't too far from here. Her mama would be worried, but once she explained what transpired, she was sure her mom would excuse her.

They walked in silence, but the auburn teen was itching for a conversation with her new friend. That felt surprisingly good. She didn't realize how refreshing it would be to share that title with him. Initially, Sana wouldn't have cared. But, as she learned more, she realized that she wanted to know more about the mysterious lone wolf that came into her life.

Her thoughts were short lived as the street she lived on appeared. And Hayama was still standing next to her even though his street was passed a few blocks ago.

No way.

There was no way Hayama… He didn't… did he?

"Kurata."

Pulled away from her thoughts, she shook her head at the sound of her name and turned to look at the tall, blond haired teen with unruly golden eyes that looked just a bit less dull than yesterday.

"Yeah?" reaching to the back of his head, he began scratching at it while his eyes were down casted towards the floor. This was… interesting the least to say. Was there something he wanted to say?

"I… umm… uh… " Sana raised a brow but outwardly giggled. It was kind of… cute? How much he was struggling with the words he was trying to say.

The giggling caused him to stiffen. Oh lame. And instead he glared and looked away.

"You know what? Forget it." Hayama huffed and Sana began to laugh. Was he embarrassed? Oh God. This was too good!

"Ara, ara! Don't get your panties in a bunch, Hayama! I was only kidding. This is just weird. You don't normally have your tongue tied." She said and he stopped in his step. But, he didn't turn around to face her.

Sana stopped laughing and cocked her head to the side.

"You're so annoying." It was her turn to snort as she crossed her arms. What a jerk. But what can you expect? He's not going to be so nice so fast.

"Hey! Uncalled for!" She shouted in retaliation.

"But, I guess it's what you're good at or whatever. So, just keep doing it, or whatever. I don't care."

Sana's frown and glare dropped as the words left his lips. She went wide eyed as the tone of his voice dropped low. It wasn't that condescending type of insult where it sounded like a venomous insult like before.

This time, it sounded almost… thankful?

Sana's eyes went wide as he trailed off, his hands in his pocket, his back retreating, growing smaller and smaller into the night. It was different from before. Different from how he used to treat and talk to her.

Did Hayama just... ?

Her heart raced if only for a quick second.

It was subtle, and barely noticeable, but in his own way, Hayama thanked her.

She couldn't stop the ever growing smile that spread on her lips.

You're welcome, Akito.

A/N: So there's a reason this chapter came out later than usual. There was supposed to be another chapter in between this one and the last one. But, I made the executive decision to change it because I threw out the other chapter for sakes of the story. Looking back, I didn't need it. It would have just been a waste and addd nothing to the story. So, there's that.

Other than that, how did you like this chapter?! We FINALLY have prlogression with Sana and Akito, and it's just going to get better from here on out. I'm excited for what's to come next and watching the story unfold with you all. I hope you all enjoyed as much as I enjoyed writing it :) Reviews and comments are always welcomed!

Until next time!

-Dark Waffle