The crowd cheers as each graduate walks across the stage. Steve clutches the chair in front of him, holding himself up and steady. Sam, Sarah, Howard, the Barnes, Mrs. Stark and the other kids from the house cheer wildly as first Bucky and later Natasha each accept their diploma, turn their tassel, and walk off the stage.
Steve cheers and shouts as loud as his cracked throat will allow.
—
Bucky tries not to laugh as Steve puts on his new glasses. They're even thicker than before, and truthfully, the continual degradation of his eyes is a frightening aspect of his body giving out, but his eyes just look so massive.
"You're kidding." Steve says to Howard, looking in the mirror.
"'Fraid not, pal. This is what they sent after your tests."
"I look like you've glued magnifying lenses to my face."
Natasha's voice is wobbly with a bit of humor as she tries not to giggle. "I think you look fine."
Steve glares at her, but the magnification of his blue eyes makes it difficult to take him seriously.
Clint snorts, trying to muffle it with his hand.
And something in Steve's face shifts, till his voice gets sarcastic and he looks out the windows, "guess that kid my freshman year was right."
Bucky feels his blood run cold. Stick Bug.
"Steve." Bucky says sharply, "shut up."
But Steve just laughs and waves his incredibly bony arms and wiggles his fingers at his enormous eyes. "I mean, it's fitting though right?" He doesn't let Bucky finish, just standing up, grabbing his cane and walking towards the elevator, "come on, Tony should be here soon, and then we can get going."
—
Howard and Steve chat at the kitchen counter, while Clint stands there, eating something crunchy and just listening.
"Are you excited?" She asks, nudging Bucky's arm.
He smiles, "I mean, yeah, who wouldn't be. A free vacation?"
"Graduation gift." She corrects.
He laughs, "whatever. I'm just stoked. I've never even been out of New York City before."
The door opens and they hear Tony before they see him. "Where's the fam." He calls out, "come meet, Pep!"
Two figures round the corner and they all stand, ready to greet them.
Natasha sees a tall, beautiful girl round the corner, looking a bit apprehensive but smiling as she comes into view. Tony, significantly shorter than her, leads the way, his hair a wild mess and his sunglasses perched on his nose.
"Everyone's here!" He says with a smirk, "everyone, this is Pepper, Pepper, this is—" he starts pointing, "My dad, Clint, Steve, Natasha, and Bucky."
"Hello," she says with a smile, "I've heard a lot about you all."
Tony starts to speak, making a joke about something, but Natasha watches as Pepper's eyes land on Steve and stay there for just a moment too long, her eyes knowing. Then she's looking at Tony and rolling her eyes at something he's saying.
"Steve," Tony asks, dropping his bag on the ground by the wall, "where's Carter?"
"She's finishing her internship with Erskine. But she'll be there for the last half of the week."
"Okay good. Because I want Pep, Nat, and Peggy to become friends because I'm simultaneously intrigued and terrified of the possibility of them being a trio."
The group laughs as Howard checks his watch.
"Okay, time to head to the airp strip, let's go."
Jarvis leads them to the large car parked out front and they get in, excitedly chatting about the upcoming trip.
—-
Clint cracks his neck and yawns, leaning back against the seat in the car as they pull onto the private airstrip.
This is what Howard had originally shown up to his dad's apartment for. To ask permission to take him on a trip.
They get out of the car and their bags are loaded into the storage.
Now here he stands, waiting to be taken to some unknown location, Howard wanting it to be a surprise. Mrs. Stark was already wherever they were going and not even Tony knew.
The jet takes off and they chat or sleep or watch movies to pass the time.
He's fallen asleep, night outside the windows and the cabin dim, when he feels something brush past him. He blinks, taking in his darkened surroundings. Bucky and Natasha are across from him, dead asleep. Tony is asleep and Pepper is reading something. She looks up as he looks her way and she smiles before returning to her book.
He leans around to see Howard sitting on his heels next to Steve's seat. He can hear soft talking and he leans forward to listen.
"—be fine, Howard. I can walk."
"No, I brought a chair, it will be—"
"I'm not using a wheelchair, Howard. I can walk just fine."
"It's a lot of walking, Steve. I've had this trip planned since your freshman year. If I'd known—"
"Known what?" Steve's tired voice says, "that my joints would be like rusted bolts when I'm 17? It doesn't matter. You're already being really generous taking us on the vacation, I'm glad you didn't change it for me."
"Please, just consider it, okay?"
There's a soft pause and then Steve's voice has a smile, "I'll consider it if you tell me where we're going?"
Howard laughs softly, "no dice, pal. You gotta find out like all the rest."
Clint leans back and feels his eyes growing heavy. Steve's joints, especially the hip that was broken by the brothers and his knees, have been getting very weak and painful.
They may have teased him for his glasses, but the minute Steve was handed a cane, no one said a word. Bucky had expressed to Clint in confidence how glad he was that school was over and Steve didn't have to use it in front of all his classmates… yet.
But his senior year was coming. And all of them would be lying if they said they weren't terrified of Steve facing his senior year alone.
The only one not worried, or at least was pretending not to be, was Steve.
—-
They step off the jet, and stare at the large car in front of them. Mrs. Stark is there, holding a sign.
Welcome to London!
They all just stand there in shock, except Tony, who is used to his parents' antics.
"I'm in Europe?" Bucky says, glancing around.
Howard laughs, "indeed. And yes, I have your passports. No need to worry."
Pepper is standing near Steve, her eyes wide in disbelief. While Steve looks pale and a bit overwhelmed.
"Come on." Howard says, opening the car door. "Lots to see, things to do. Get in."
—
Steve's in bed, dead asleep, wheezing slightly and face looking drawn and exhausted. After a long day of sightseeing, they were relaxing in their hotel rooms.
His mom and dad are in the next room, and Pep, and Natasha are in the room across the hall. Bucky is sitting quietly on the bed he's sharing with Steve, and Clint and he are sitting on the other king bed, talking softly.
"He didn't even eat dinner, he was so tired." Bucky says, eyes glancing at Steve.
"Your dad tried to convince him to use a wheelchair on the plane." Clint mentions softly, gesturing to Tony. "Steve refused though."
Tony leans back, the soft pillows against the headboard behind his back. "He told me that he wanted to plan a big trip like this during Steve's freshman year. As a graduation gift to all of us. But…" he grimaces, "he moved it up to this summer. Instead of next summer when Steve had graduated. He was too worried about Steve deteriorating further."
Clint shifts, "now that I live in your house, I see a lot more of Steve and your dad in the lab. It's pretty brutal."
Bucky's ears pique, "what do you mean?"
"Just…" Clint gestures to Steve, "it's a lot of blood being drawn, or a lot of tests, exercises to work or stimulate his muscles. Your dad puts him through the wringer."
Tony twirls the phone in his hands, "I know. He's so freaked out that he won't find a solution that he's pushing Steve pretty hard. I told him to back off, but he doesn't know how to quit." Clint chuckles and they turn to him in surprise. "What?"
He points to Steve, "maybe your dad doesn't listen to you, but he listens to Peggy."
"Carter?" Bucky asks, "what happened?"
"She's down there a lot with Steve." Clint says, "she comes over often and one time I was down there and we were talking as your dad was doing tests on Steve's liver. And you know, Steve's on his stomach, looking at Peggy who's sitting at his head, and I guess Peggy saw something she didn't like and she snapped at your dad so firmly that we all just kind of pulled back in surprise. And Steve tried to say it was okay, but she glared at Steve who just went quiet. Then she sort of went on a rant to ask Howard if he even thought to ask Steve if what he was doing was causing him pain, which, of course, led to the fact that Steve hadn't been mentioning how painful the tests were becoming to him and it was this whole argument between Peggy and Howard versus Steve about him telling them these things and at the end Peggy just looked at Howard and said, 'do better'. And your dad just said, 'okay'."
Tony blinks. "You're kidding."
"I'm very much not."
"Damn, Carter." Bucky says with a soft whistle, "she really means business."
"I'm glad she's going to NYU. At least Steve will have her close—" Bucky gestures to Clint, "you and Natasha will keep an eye on him, right?"
Tony watches Clint nod, "of course. And the group chat will make sure we all stay in touch."
"You starting full time classes this year?" Bucky asks Clint.
"Yeah, it's weird, but I'll still work the evening shifts."
"Nat is going to be so busy this year, her going to that prestigious dance school."
Bucky nods, a smile on his face, "yeah, she's awesome."
The TV is on, playing quietly in the background as they discuss what they're upcoming plans are.
—
Steve feels warm hands touch his face.
He thinks someone calls his name, but it's sort of muffled. Without opening his eyes, he reaches for where he put his hearing aid on the bedside stand. He fits it in his ear and hears again, "Steve, wake up."
He groans, shifting, feeling every ache in his body. Yawning , he stretches and tries to escape from the tangle of sheets.
"Steve—" a soft voice says in a laugh, "Happy Birthday."
"Peggy?" He asks, his voice still deep and gravelly with sleep.
"It might be, if you could ever get out of this tornado you slept in."
He pops his head up, and takes her in. "You're here?" He asks, tilting his head, "I thought you weren't coming til Thursday?"
She laughs, "I couldn't miss your birthday. And I finished everything with Erskine early. He didn't mind."
At that, he pushes himself up and grabs his glasses, putting them on so he can actually take her in. She's smiling and fresh and vibrant as she sits on his bed, a cinnamon roll on a plate in her hands with two candles sticking out of it, a '1' and an '8' alight. She sets the plate on the bed stand, and grabs his hand, "happy birthday."
He smiles, "thanks." Then he looks down at his rumpled pajamas, "I should get dressed."
He finally looks up to see that the room in empty but the door is cracked. "Did everyone know you were coming early?"
"No, just Howard, but when I knocked and Clint answered he was happy to oblige."
Steve shakes his head, "you guys are all too much."
She brushes his bed hair back, "get ready, I can't wait to show you London. My stomping grounds now." At that she kisses his forehead and leaves, waving. The other boys file back in with grins on their faces and Steve flops back onto the pillows.
"And you all didn't believe me when I said she was the one."
"We were wrong, Steve." Bucky says easily. "Now go get ready. We've got to show these Brits how Americans celebrate the fourth."
Steve laughs as he gets out of bed slowly and works his way to the bathroom, ignoring the cane leaning against the chair.
—-
Steve enjoys Peggy pointing out things she knows or places she used to hang out. They take her advice on places to eat and what things are worth seeing. They spend the day celebrating Steve's birthday and at the end of the night, they take the London Eye and watch the city lights as it circles slowly.
His feet ache and his joints are protesting wildly, but he doesn't say anything. He uses his cane because truthfully he wouldn't be able to make it if he didn't. But Howard tries a couple more times to offer him a wheelchair, and his body is begging him to take it… but his mind and pride just won't allow it.
—
Howard doesn't tell them where their next stop is. Clint thinks Peggy knows, just from the direction their heading, but none of the rest of them have a clue.
They get off the train and onto a boat and something must start to dawn on Steve and Tony's minds because Tony smiles at his dad and Steve goes sheet white.
Clint watches as Steve grips the railing of the boat staring off at the ocean. Peggy stands beside him and they're silent.
"Where are we going?" Bucky asks, "why does Steve—"
"Home." Tony says quietly. "My dad's taking us to Ireland. Steve's Irish. Mom immigrated to New York when she was a little girl."
"How do you know all that?" Natasha asks. Clint recalls Steve mentioning something of the sort but it was never a thorough discussion.
"You find out a lot during a trial." Tony says softly. "I know Steve's whole family history and so does my dad. And he said that once, during a lab session, Steve had admitted he's always wanted to go to Ireland. His ma always talked about it and wanted to take him but she never got the chance."
"Your dad is unbelievable." Bucky says softly, looking at the way Howard and Maria are talking at a table not too far from them.
Tony chuckles, "you can say that again."
—-
Natasha does not mention the red rimmed eyes that Steve sports as he walks off the gangplank, his cane tapping on the metal.
—
After they settle into their hotel rooms, they freshen up and head out to dinner. Steve sits enraptured listening to the people around him as they speak what he claims as his first language.
"—agus chuadar anonn go dtí a bráithre—"
"—Ní raibh sé i gceist don chóisir sin. Tá súil agam leat—"
"—A ligean ar dul chun cinn sula mbeidh sé ró-dhéanach. Is cuimhin leat nuair a muid—"
He could pick out snippets or words, some familiar phrases his ma had always used, but mostly he just listened. Taking in every sight and sound so that way he would never forget. He could remember being here for the both of them.
—
Bucky's behind Steve as the doors to the elevator slide open. He expects Steve to move, and Steve tries to take a step, but Bucky hears a soft intake of breath and he sees Steve shiver.
"Steve?"
Natasha, Tony, and Clint, who are already out of the elevator don't hear the soft exchange and continue walking to their rooms. But Peggy, who was standing besides Steve, looks at him sharply and then to Steve.
"I'm okay." Steve says, his voice trying for lightness but wrapped in pain.
Bucky, now towering over Steve in height and bulk, knows instantly that that's a lie, and he steps to Steve's side, sliding an arm under Steve's shoulders and helping to prop him up taking some of the weight off his legs.
They step out of the elevator and Steve tries to pull out of his grasp. "I'm fine. I'm okay, just—" he cuts off and Peggy touches his cheek.
"Just what Steve?"
"Just felt my hip go stiff. I didn't want to risk taking a step on it."
This is pretty normal occurrence, so they don't argue for more information. They just get him back to his room, and onto the bed. Tony and Clint watch as Bucky helps him, and Peggy, without pity or condescension ensures that he has what he needs at his bedside.
Steve protests, "I need to shower, I'm fine you guys, thanks."
Peggy leaves to her own room, but her eyes trail on Steve the whole time she exits, concern etched on her features.
"You sure you should be standing in the shower?" Clint asks, "maybe you should take a bath—"
"No." Bucky says sharply. "No baths. You're too tired."
Steve sags, "guys, I'm fine. Okay? Don't ruin this trip by worrying."
Tony's the only one who stays silent.
Steve insists they all shower before him as he may take a while to move about and they only agree because they know that if he's first he'll feel pressured to move fast for them. So if he goes last then he can relax.
They hear the shower turn on and they start to finally take a breath to relax after the long days of travel and sightseeing.
It's maybe 15 minutes later that Bucky's ears perk up. And he sees Clint's do the same.
Tony has headphones in, but he sees them sit up and he furrows his brow. "What?"
"Shh." Clint hisses.
And there it was again, "g-guys?"
Bucky's on his feet and opening the thankfully unlocked bathroom door. His eyes catch immediately on Steve, staring at him with an ashamed expression on his face.
It only takes Bucky a few seconds to realize what's going on. Steve is sitting at the bottom of the glass cubicle shower, unable to get back up.
He walks forward, feeling Clint and Tony behind him as he opens the glass door. He could care less that Steve's naked. Bucky's eyes stay on his face as Steve looks like he wants to sink through the floor.
"Come on—" Bucky says firmly, no hint of anything but trying to be helpful, "let's get you—" his hand passes through the water and he yanks it back in surprise, it's ice cold. "Why the hell are you in cold water!" Bucky says loudly, reaching back out and ignoring the cold as it needles at his skin and takes Steve's shaking outstretched hand.
He hauls him up, getting his pajama shirt relatively soaked as Steve's shivering frame clutches his. A towel appears out of nowhere and wraps itself around Steve's shoulders. Steve clutches it gratefully and that when Bucky notices his blue lips and the framework of blue veins running in string contrast to his pale skin.
They get Steve in front of the heater, someone grabs a sweater of his and shoves it over his head and Bucky grabs the hand towel and is scrubbing it over Steve's wet hair. The towel covers Steve's bottom hall and socks get pulled from his small suitcase and yanked onto his feet.
Clint looks at Steve who looks miserable and embarrassed and puts his hands on his hips, "what happened?"
—-
Steve starts the shower, and it's hot pretty quickly as Clint had just finished minutes ago. He stops in, glad for the metal rail on the outside of the shower to help him stay steady.
Once inside, the shelves and knobs are all up high on the wall and his shorter than average frame struggles to stay standing with his tired body protesting every second.
He gets shampooed and washes his body, but when he tries to put conditioner in, his joints give out and he places a hand on the wall and slowly sinks to the ground.
It's not too bad, the hot water beating on his tired bones. He soaks it in for a few minutes, closing his eyes as the hot water trails the conditioner out of his hair and down his back.
He doesn't notice the shift at first but the water starts to cool, and he realizes too late that the hot water is running out.
He tries to stand but his hip locks and he's unable to move.
There's nothing to grip or get leverage with and the water is growing more freezing by the second.
Only 1 minute into the water turning fully cold does he realize what he has to do.
"B-bucky?" He calls out, hoping they aren't already asleep or maybe watching TV.
When no one comes he feels a thrill of panic, but tamps it down, "g-guys?" He calls louder.
Within seconds Bucky is there, helping him up and Clint has a Towel and Tony's grumbling about how organized his suitcase is as he picks up a large sweater to shove onto his body.
"And that's what happened." Steve finishes, feeling the shivers subside. "Sorry…"
Bucky looks at him and lays back on the bed. "You and bathrooms are not a great combination. First Rumlow, then the Halloween bathtub and now this?"
Steve winces, "I am sorry…"
Bucky waves a hand to silence him and he falls quiet.
—
The lights are off and they are settling into sleep when Clint hears Steve texting. He lifts his head up and watches in concern as Steve has a deep seated frown on his face.
Clint settles back and wonders who he was texting.
—-
A knock on the front door startles Clint awake and he blearily stumbles to the door. He opens it to find a concierge worker with a wheelchair. "I was told to deliver this to this room?"
"It's mine." Clint hears softly behind him. He turns to find Steve, sitting on the edge of the bed, face flat and unreadable. Bucky and Tony still asleep.
"Oh." Clint says, "yeah, thanks." He accepts the wheelchair and brings it in. Rolling it closer to Steve. "Steve, you know there's no shame in using this."
"Oh yeah?" Steve snaps, staring at the open window as the sun starts to rise, "then you use it."
But Clint doesn't react, knowing the fact that Steve even admitted to Howard, that must have been who he was texting last night, that he needs this chair took a lot of guts and a whole lot of humility pie.
Clint just sits beside Steve, careful not to jostle Bucky, as they watch the sun rise over Belfast.
—-
Natasha is the first to see it, Steve's new mode of travel. But she only feels surprised for a moment as she watches Peggy bend to meet Steve's eyes and kiss him softly. Natasha hears her whisper, "I'm so proud of you." Before running her fingers through his hair while he rolls his eyes and smiles fondly at her.
They take turns pushing him all day, Clint and Tony fighting over it the most because it has a cup holder on the back. Natasha thinks that at the end of the day, when Steve is able to stay awake longer and enjoy the night in the city because he wasn't so tired from walk-in all day, that maybe he opens up to the idea that it wasn't so bad.
—-
The rest of the summer passes in a haze of college prep for Natasha, Peggy, and Bucky. College Applications and signing up for the SAT's and ACT's for Steve. Tony almost misses his classes enrollment day but squeaks by. Clint buys books and starts getting excited to be back to school full time to get his degree.
Pepper visits often, having become an easy addition to the group and letting them see a new side to Tony that they were not privy to before.
Bucky looks around the table at Milo's at the 8 of them. Laura, Clint's girlfriend, is a lot quieter and more reserved, but she is kind and seems to genuinely enjoy their antics as a group. She's not able to be around as often, but they enjoy when she can.
Peggy whispers something to Steve that makes him blush and Bucky laughs. "What did she say?"
Steve shakes his head and his eyes go to the table, "nothing."
Peggy laughs and raises an eyebrow at Bucky, "none of your concern, James."
—-
Natasha watches as Peter, Wanda, Pietro, and Steve play video games trying to get in the last bit of summer freedom as school starts next week. She's basically all packed and ready to go. She looks out the door to the section of the stairs and sighs. Yelena was excited for her to go to school, but she wasn't excited to be left behind.
"I'm going to visit all the time." Natasha had promised, "and you can come visit me, I'm only like 45 minutes away by train."
"I know, I just…" Yelena had looked at her hands and sighed, "I just don't want to be left behind."
Natasha had held her tight, "I'm not leaving anything or anyone behind. So you can just stop thinking that right now."
—
Everyone hugs their goodbyes as they load up the car Howard was letting them use to move all her stuff. Natasha hugs Yelena for long minutes as they cry and Wanda clings to Pietro's hand, trying to withhold tears.
"You guys are acting like I'm never coming back." She says with a watery laugh. I'll be back in October for fall break, okay?"
Sam claps his hands, "time to go."
They nod sadly and she stops at Steve and Bucky who are standing by the doors. She nudges Steve's arms, "you're back to being the oldest in the house."
Steve tries to smile, while he speaks softly, "yay." It's not very enthusiastic.
"I'll be back to visit."
He nods. "I know."
She hugs him and he walks back to the steps, Peter coming to stand beside him.
She and Bucky get in and she tries not to cry at the way they wave at her as the car pulls away.
—
Bucky wakes as the plane lands. Tony still has his headphones in as the debark, and the car ride to MIT is relatively silent.
But Tony shows him around campus, tells him where the good food and coffee is at, and then drops him and his things off at the freshman dorm.
"Don't be a stranger." Tony says, "you need me? I'm always in the lab. If I'm not there, I'm with Pepper. And if I'm not with her, then I'm probably asleep."
Bucky laughs and nods, waving him away, "go do your junior college boy stuff."
Tony throws up a peace sign and asks off, leaving Bucky to stare up at the massive brick building.
—-
Steve says the 4th goodbye in too few days as Peggy puts her final bags into her parents' car.
He's only had the opportunity to meet them twice, as they travel a lot for her dad's work. But they've been cordial if not a bit taken aback by his appearance. But Peggy's never let him doubt her affection for him for a moment, so he doesn't.
She stares at him and he stares back, a fond smile for her on his lips.
"I despise saying goodbye to people." She says crisply, trying to keep a stiff upper lip.
He sighs, "I don't like it either. It's all I've been doing this last week and a half."
She closes the trunk and leans on it. "I wish NYU wasn't so far."
"Peggy, you're a couple of trains away. That's not too far. I'm just glad you're in the same state!"
The distance is closed between them quickly and she wraps her hands around his waist, pulling him close. His arms go around her shoulders and back and they stand there for a few minutes, just hugging.
Finally she pulls back and places a soft kiss on his lips. "I shall miss you, darling."
He smiles, loving when she calls him that, "not as much as I will miss you."
She kisses him again, this time less soft, more urgent as she pulls him closer, as if unwilling to let him go.
He kisses her firmly back, holding her neck and feeling her soft hair between his fingers as his other hand presses her against him.
He breaks them apart, needing air and she rests her head on his shoulders. "You promise to take care of yourself?"
"As best as I can," he responds honestly.
They speak for a few more minutes before her father and mother inform them it's time to go. She gets in the car and rolls the back window down, beckoning him closer. He obliges and she tugs his face down, kissing him soundly and making him blush as her parents try to pretend like they aren't there.
"I love you." She says, confidentially and without hesitation.
He smiles and holds her cheek gently, brushing his thumb along her cheekbone in a way he knows she likes. "I love you too."
She kisses him again and is gone, the car disappearing around the corner all too soon.
Steve picks up his cane and starts the slow walk to the subway alone.
—