"Barnes, if you don't stop bouncing that damn knee."
His leg stills.
Castle sighs before continuing his debrief and Bucky tries to remain very still. He's been a veritable nuisance this week as the time is ticking down until he's going to see her.
Natasha.
He keeps the grin off his face but it's like they can read his mind because Clint rolls his eyes fondly and Steve is nodding like he gets the excitement.
Of course he's excited too because Peggy's going to be there.
Clint's been pouting because Laura can't make it but he's taking an extra two days to see her after so he's not too bitter.
"—get your damn head out of the clouds!"
He snaps his head up to see Castle staring at him with an annoyed expression. "Being this distracted is going to get one of us or yourself killed! If I don't see some freakin' brain cells reappear I'm pulling you from this mission and rescinding your permission for Leave!"
Bucky keeps his eyes on Castle but he can see in his peripheral vision everyone staring silently.
"I'll be focused, sir." He says quietly. "I promise."
Castle just glares at him before returning to his debrief and Bucky does his absolute best to listen to every word.
—
"Everyone say hi!"
Steve hears a chorus of hello's and excited faces and he waves back and calls out to each of them, greeting them by their name.
After a few minutes the crowd disperses and Sam gives him a raised eyebrow before handing the phone over.
Steve smiles, "hey Peter."
"Hey Steve." The kid studies him, "your face looks different."
Steve chuckles, "so does yours. You're growing up fast. How's school going?"
"Good. I'm top of my class. Almost."
"Almost?" Starve asks with a tease, "who is beating you?"
"Michelle and I are tied."
Steve nods. This name has popped up a few times, "is she nice?"
"Yeah. She's nice. Really smart." Then Peter tries to look really nonchalant. Steve can tell because he does that nervous jitter before stilling himself, "so when are you coming home?"
The knife wound he'd taken last mission was nothing compared to this one.
"Soon buddy. I'm coming to visit as soon as I can. I promise."
"Okay, cool yeah. Whenever you can. I know you're busy."
"I'm not too busy for you." Steve tries to say firmly but with a teasing voice, "never too busy for family."
"Someone took your bed."
"I know…" he says lightly, "Sam told me." He grins, "hope they don't snore."
"She doesn't." Peter says matter of factly. "She's messier than you though."
"Well I'm sure she's learning the ropes. Everyone is welcoming her, right?"
"Yeah. Sam threw a welcome party and we all got to swim at Mr. Stark's house."
"That's nice. I'm sure that was a lot of fun." Peter's head shifts as if he was called.
"I gotta go." There's a pause where Peter doesn't go. And he looks back up, big eyes pouring into Steve's with a pleading expression, "come back soon?"
"I'll visit soon." Steve says with a nod, "I promise."
"Okay."
Peter must hang up because the screen goes black.
"Why didn't you tell him we're seeing him in just a few days?" Clint stands in the doorway, holding a bowl of something.
"Sam doesn't trust the kids just yet. He's dead set on it being a surprise. So the only people in the house who know are Sam, Yelena, and Wanda."
"Not Pietro?" Steve raises an eyebrow and Clint laughs in response, "okay, he does tend to have loose lips. Probably smart not to tell him."
Steve grabs his gear bag and shoulders it, "plane ready?"
Clint nods and shovels another bite in, "yeah." They walk to the exit and step out into the dying sunlight. "How do you feel?"
Steve holds up a hand, gesturing to Blaze that they're coming, "feel about what?"
"Your bed being taken."
"Strange."
"I bet." It's quiet for a moment and then Clint shrugs, "you want to talk about it?"
"I'm not living there, Clint. I don't need a bed."
"Yeah but…" there's sort of an awkward tension that arises in Clint's shoulders and expression.
"Yeah, but what?"
"You gotta…"
"Gotta?"
"You gotta have a home somewhere right?"
That pulls him up short, "what's that supposed to mean?"
Clint gestures to himself, "when I go to New York I stay with the Starks. That's my home. Bucky has his home…"
He's not sure why but he gets defensive. Quick.
"I can stay in the guest bedroom."
Clint's brow furrows, "oh… I thought Sarah had moved in and taken that room."
He blinks. Oh yeah. They'd been busier and Sam had needed extra help so she'd sold her tiny apartment and moved in. Now they were getting more kids and it was a good situation. But that meant…
"Oh." Steve says softly, "yeah."
"I was going to call Howard." Clint offers, "move you into one of his rooms."
Steve wrinkles his nose, "no. Don't do that. I'm fine. It's fine. I'll bunk on the ground when I visit."
"Steve, you're almost 6'4. If you bunk on the ground you'll be a fire hazard."
The grimace he wears makes Clint laugh.
"I'm not looking forward to all the comments." Steve sighs out. "It's going to be brutal."
"Steve, you gained over a hundred pounds, grew almost a foot, and look like you've been going to the gym since you were in diapers. They're going to notice and they're going to comment."
Steve groans, "I can't even help it!"
"Let's go boys!" Castle shouts, stepping onto the tarmac. "We've got a mission to complete before you guys take off."
"Sir, yes, sir." Clint mouths off, slapping a hand on Steve's back. "Did you take my advice?"
Steve rolls his eyes, "no. I did not take a mirror selfie and send it to people to warn them. I'd die of embarrassment."
Clint laughs all the way to the plane.
—-
Natasha looks at her suitcase.
"Staring at it won't make you remember if you forgot something."
She rolls her eyes and flips Whitney off. "I'm just sure I'm forgetting something." She says with a sigh. "And I hate feeling like that."
"We're going to London." Whitney intones, "not the Sahara desert. If you forget something, you can just buy it."
The thought makes her pause for two reasons. One, Whitney may not have been born with money, she's not sure anyways, but the girl certainly has money to spare now. And isn't shy about it.
Two… she's right. Natasha's making plenty of money now. She's just so not used to it that she forgets. Her adoptive mother's voice trickles in every once and awhile. Making her forget she has her own finances. She's got… money.
And obviously since she started living with Sam and in the realm of wealth of the Starks she hasn't wanted for anything really.
But that clawing desperation of 'what if it goes away' never really goes away.
She remembers the second week after Steve had come home from the hospital. Sam had found out that the dryer vents hadn't been cleaned in years and he was mad. Going on and on in his room on the phone with Sarah about how that's a huge fire hazard and a danger to the kids and a safety issue for the house.
She and Steve had been listening in outside his door. And when he'd exited the room, he'd caught them listening.
After Steve had asked if it was something he should have been aware of and done something about, Sam had thrown up his hands in frustration.
Making both of them flinch back.
Sam had immediately frozen and looked at them in shock.
But neither had moved. Still staring at him with wide eyes. Worried that maybe Sam wasn't so perfect after all.
Sam had slowly lowered his hands to his sides and shaken his head. "I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you. No, Steve, it's nothing you should have had to worry about—"
"But I did most of the laundry—"
"That's irrelevant. This is something professionals have to do. I'm frustrated at Mrs. Schmidt. I shouldn't have gotten so heated on the phone. And just to be clear—" then he'd held up his hands in a show of surrender, "I will never ever ever—" Natasha had seen the sadness in his eyes as he spoke the last words, "lay an angry hand on you guys or any of the kids. Do you understand? Never. Not ever."
Neither had responded. Promises didn't mean much just yet.
But Sam had been very cognizant after that of how his anger looked and how his physicality was affected by said anger. Natasha saw how his hands never moved too fast for the first year. Slow, steady, telegraphing each motion.
She doesn't know what she or Yelena did to end up having him as a dad but she thanks every lucky star she comes across.
It had taken a while but after Steve's first official argument with Sam— her brain fritzes.
What had that argument been about?
She snags her phone and dials a number.
"Yes, I'm still coming to London. Stop worrying."
Natasha grins, "good. You better. But no, Lena that's not why I called. What was that argument about? The one where Steve and Sam argued, you know, the big one, really early on to Sam being there?"
There's a long pause and Yelena makes an "uhhhh" sound before the girl yawns (whoops she forgot about the time difference) "wasn't that the one about Steve taking stuff out of the donation bins?"
Natasha shudders. "No, that wasn't the argument. I remember that talk though. Yeesh."
Steve had had some pretty hard habits to break those first couple years. Stuff Sam hadn't even known he would have to address. Things Mrs. Schmidt had told him to do or trained him to think was normal. Each one made Sam look like he was about to shatter. Steve didn't even always realize the things he did out of protection for the other kids or coping mechanisms wasn't normal.
"Oh…" Yelena's voice gets quiet, "I remember." She waits. "When he found Steve hiding food in the basement out of habit."
Oh. Yeah.
Sam had come up from the basement, small packages of food and water bottles in his hands. "Anyone know why this was hiding all around in the basement? I'm trying to clear stuff out and I keep finding food."
She hadn't known it was Steve. No one had.
Steve hadn't said a word. Just let Sam throw it away or put it back in the pantry.
A week later Sam had found more and tried asking again.
Two days later he found more and started getting seriously concerned. But no one knew who it was. Or so they thought.
The fourth time, Steve had been out with Howard running some health tests.
And when Sam decided to ask each kid individually. Peter had made a comment that Mrs. Schmidt used to keep kids down there. So having food down there was a good thing. Just in case.
Sam had very calmly asked who Mrs. Schmidt had placed down there the most.
Peter had been nervous to say, apologizing over and over. But eventually Sam was able to get Steve's name.
When Steve had gotten home, Sam had asked Steve to come talk to him in the kitchen and Natasha had creeped to the doorway to listen with Wanda and Pietro.
It had taken a lot of careful questions from Sam before Steve understood where the conversation was going and had clammed up.
When Sam told him that he didn't need to hide food. That there was always going to be enough. Steve had denied doing so.
So Sam had let it go.
But when a week later, Sam caught Steve down in the basement (at 2 am) hiding food, it had escalated quickly. Probably the loudest she ever heard Sam talk at Steve. But it hadn't been in anger. It had been in desperation. "Trust me, Steve. Please. You have to trust me! If you don't, the other kids won't either! I'm not going anywhere. You will always have food!"
"You don't know that!" Steve had shouted, "you can't know that!"
Again, promises hadn't mean much to them then.
So, after a very heartbreaking argument that they had listened to from the top of the stairs, Sam had relented. Telling Steve that if hiding food was how he felt comfortable, that he would allow it, for now.
After that argument, when Sam hadn't lashed out physically, or denied Steve the ability to hide food… he'd passed some mark. Some test in Steve's mental or emotional barrier.
He stopped hiding food soon after and never worried about Sam turning on them.
The house had been at peace.
"Oh yeah," Natasha responds, "thanks."
"What brought that up?"
"Just trying to remember when I stopped flinching and my brain bounced around to that."
"Gotcha. Sam's all back to his usual carefulness. The new girl musta come from a bad home. She's skittish."
"Oh really? What's her name?"
"She said to call her Skye. Think it's a name she picked for herself."
"Well, make sure she's being welcomed well. You know how scary that can be."
"Oh for sure, she's cool. But pretty standoffish. We will break her walls down. You know Sam is good at that."
"And Sarah. And the food. And Howard. And Mrs. Starks' ability to give a gift exactly when you need it."
Yelena laughs, "Oh, for sure. That woman is uncanny. The other day, I ripped a hole in that old leather jacket I have, you know, the old brown one I found back before we moved in?"
"Yeah—"
"Well, I ripped a hole, and the next day she calls offering a leather jacket she doesn't wear any more. Practically fell off my bed in shock."
Natasha laughs and nods, "she sent me a bottle of ranch because she saw a funny video that Europe doesn't really have ranch. And I got my mail and found it the hour after I cried about being homesick."
They talk for a while more before they get to the airport and she has to hang up.
"I'll see you in just a few days. Okay?"
"Can't wait. Love you, Nat!"
"Love you too."
—
Clint wakes from the landing and sits up.
They have one more transfer and then a helicopter ride to their actual location, but they have a small layover in Graz, Austria first.
"I'm going to find food." Steve says, sounding tired about it.
"Of course you are." Blaze says with an eye roll towards Steve's back.
"Lay off." Bucky says with a snap.
"Stop." Castle commands, not even looking up.
Clint snorts. At first the team had been in shock at Steve's continual and unending growth, his skill, speed, strength, and everything else. But thankfully, they'd fallen into a comfortable rhythm. Steve was still as hungry as he's ever been (a fact he tries really hard not to complain about, Clint knows) but other than that, had seemed to stop having fits of pain or huge growth spurts.
If someone took a picture of Steve a year ago, and a picture now, no one would believe they were the same person. Even his face shape is different. Only the eyes and the hair give it away.
The funniest part about it is that Steve is so awkward about it. He's never been tall, or strong or buff. And he has no idea how to even act like he is. They were in Belarus a month ago, prepping for some mission the next day and some girl had tried to approach him. He'd been genuinely confused. Clint and Bucky had laughed and teased him about it endlessly. And although Steve had been a good sport. They could tell he just genuinely didn't understand why she would choose him out of the whole group.
It would probably be easy for them to resent Steve now. He was taller and stronger, and more skilled in almost every way. But they couldn't care less. He takes knife wounds like they're pin pricks and bullets like they're paintballs. He heals faster than they can keep track and he's never been healthier.
He'd asked Bucky if that meant he might quit since he didn't have to worry about Steve getting hurt anymore. Bucky had laughed and then considered it. "I may not stay forever. But I'm okay with where I am for now."
And Clint had felt that way too.
—-
"We're going to be late."
"Seeing as it's my plane." His dad says, nose deep in an engine, "I figured it would wait for me."
"Okay but Mom's started tapping her foot and Jarvis has that pinched look on his face."
"I'm coming." He hears the resigne debut humored sigh. "I'm coming."
The flight goes faster than normal probably because there's a ton of kids excitedly bouncing in their seats and staring out the windows gasping at every cloud or peek of land every couple minutes.
Tony plays some game with Peter and talks with Wanda and Pietro for a while.
"You're almost graduated, right?"
He nods, watching as Yelena slips into the now empty seat beside him, "I am."
"What are you going to do after?"
"Probably work with my dad."
"That what you wanna do?"
"Surprisingly, yes." He huffs a laugh and Yelena looks at him curiously, "before you guys came into the picture, my dad and I didn't get along. Steve helped that somehow."
"Classic Steve."
"Indeed. What about you, you're a… Junior?"
"Sophomore."
"Right, right. Enjoying it?"
"Yeah. Kinda lonely though. Miss having them in the house."
"I'm sure. You're one one the older ones now, right?"
"Yep. Just Wanda, Pietro, and Daniel are older."
"How's Daniel?"
"Graduating this year. Going to some school to be a dentist."
Tony laughs, "time really does fly."
"Yeah."
"Excited to see Nat?"
"Hell yes!" Yelena whoops, "it's been ages!"
"It's been less than 6 months."
"That's forever." Yelena says with a glare.
"I stand corrected." He looks around at the plane, now sort of quiet as kids start to get sleepy. "Excited to see everyone else?"
She nods, "yeah, I haven't seen those three since they left either and I miss them."
"Have you seen Steve recently?"
Her brow furrows, "no, why?"
Tony shakes his head, "he's been sort of MIA on video calls. And Clint made a weird comment about not acting like we're at a zoo watching an exotic animal. So… I don't know what the hell that means."
"Didn't you see him recently?"
"Like three months ago when we dropped off their gear."
"How much could he change in three months?" She asks, before getting called away by Wanda.
Tony just settles his head back and shrugs.
—-
"—- move!"
Bucky snaps awake. The loud gunfire making him jolt in place and then go rigid.
Someone is yelling in his coms and he tries to figure out what the hell is happening.
"—-compromised. Move now! Barnes! You need to—-"
A bullet lands beside him and he's pretty sure a sound of pure fear exits his mouth before he's scrambling away.
Another bullet lands at his feet and he's leaping, throwing himself behind a boulder and trying to catch up.
But there's a lot of yelling and he can't make any of it out.
His head feels dizzy.
Pain grazes his shoulder and he cries out, grasping where the bullet nicked him before running, holding his now numb feeling arm and running in a disorganized zig zag.
"Bucky! Stop!"
—is the last thing he hears before the ground seems to disappear from beneath his feet and he's in free fall.
—-