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Chapter 291: Drabble Collections (Incorrect Quotes Part 1)
Jadi aku memutuskan untuk membuat Incorrect Quotes untuk Chapter ini dan Chapter depan. Ini sengaja tidak di-translate, dan timeline di setiap Quotes terjadi secara random.
1. AC
Hibatur: What are you guys doing?
Rara: Like in life in general or-
Reha: Not much. Why, what's up?
Hibatur: I dunno, I'm bored playing AC.
Reha: Assassins Creed?
Hibatur: Animals Creed.
Rara: Assassins Crossing.
2. Duck
Teiron: Hey, anyone seen Flore?
Wiona: I saw her about an hour ago, she was learning how to make duck calls from YouTube.
Ikyo: That's funny, Adel and I saw her about 45 minutes ago and she asked me if I knew what foods ducks like.
Adelia: I told her to try bread.
Alpha: I saw her 15 minutes ago googling "how to build a home for a duck".
Teira: Uh oh.
Teiron: What?
Teira: I saw her about five minutes ago.
Teiron: And?
Teira: She asked me if it's illegal to take ducks from the park.
Lisa: Oh no. What did you say?
Teira: You don't wanna know.
Teiron: TEIRA!
Teira, mumbling: I told her to try it and find out.
Lisa: Oh no.
*Door slams.*
Flore, brings a backpack: Hey, I'm back!
Lisa: Please tell me you didn't steal a duck from the park.
Flore: ...
Flore: ... I didn't steal a duck.
Flore's backpack: *quacks gently.*
3. Dream
Wiona: Define "dream".
Lisa: Dream - the first thing people abandon when they learn how the world works.
Adelia: That's too dark!
4. Self Preservation
Alisa: Alpha has no self preservation instinct.
Monika: Yeah, I think he was born without it.
Ikyo: Don't be foolish, I'm sure that isn't true.
Maurice: Oh yeah? HEY ALPHA, TEIRON WANTS TO RACE YOU DOWNSTAIRS!
Alpha: *throws himself out of fourth floor window.*
5. Romance
Vivi: Good romance starts with a good friendship.
Lucy: But a bad romance starts with Rah, rah-ah-ah-ah. Roma, roma-ma. Gaga, ooh-la-la. Want your bad romance.
Vivi and Lucy, singing: Rah, rah-ah-ah-ah. Roma, roma-ma. Gaga, ooh-la-la. Want your bad romance
Alisa: Are you two done yet?
Vivi: Yes.
6. Decoration
Grayson: I thought you said you were decorating for Halloween?
Monika: I am.
Grayson: You're just hanging up pictures of some people from Reha Squad.
Monika: You said you wanted scary decorations.
7. Coffee and Energy Drink
Grayson: Today at 7 am, Mundo poured a Monster energy drink in his coffee, said "I'm gonna die" and drank the whole thing.
Exoray: I watched Mundo brew his coffee with Monster instead of water. Three cups in two hours. I think he ascended into the astral realm.
Ikyo: The survivability of the human race never fails to amaze me.
8. Switching Names
Musket: What if people had food names and food had people names?
Arta: Hey, spaghetti, we're having Musket for dinner.
Mundo: What is wrong with you people?
Vience: Shut up, chocolate.
9. Help
Musket: Look guys, I need help.
Emy: Love help?
Vestur: Financial help?
Hikari: Emotional help?
Alexia: Help moving a body?
*Everybody looks at Alexia.*
Alexia: What?
10. Chick(en) Magnet
Musket: I'm sort of a chicken magnet.
Vestur: Don't you mean a chick mag-
*Sounds of distant bawk-bawking.*
Musket: We have to go. NOW!
11. Knife and Gun
Exoray: *pulls out a knife.*
Vestur: Oh no.
Exoray: *opens a box with it.*
Vestur: Phew...
Exoray: *pulls a gun out of the box.*
Vestur: Oh no.
Alexia: Where's my gun?!
Vestur: ... Wanna run?
Exoray: Yes.
12. Swear Word
Alexia: *stubs his toe.* FUCK!
Lucy: Mind your language!
Alexia: What else am I supposed to say, "Woe is I"?
Lucy: ...
Alexia: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.
13. Three?
Cop: You're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Alexia: Shit.
Lucy: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Exoray: OH MY GOD GARCIA FELL OFF!
14. Random Talk
Federic: Technically Robocop is a transformer.
Hikari: ...
Federic: His name should have been Stoptimus Crime.
Hikari: Federic, please, it's 4 am.
15. Cook
Hikari: HELP! I TOLD LUCY I'D REPLACING FEDERIC COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!
Musket, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
16. Sleeping or Dead?
Vestur: Yo, is Federic sleeping or dead?
Alexia: Hopefully dead, I hated his guts.
Daren: Yeah, so did I.
Federic: Okay, first of all, fuck you-
17. Heels
Giro, struggling to keep upright in his 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don't really think heels are for me.
Federic, pointing at him and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.
18. Blessing
Mathias: You don't need my blessing to go kiss Greeny. In fact, I was pretty sure you were already kissing him!
Giro: Nope.
Mathias: In that case, as the archbishop of Giro's fully awakened gaydom, I give you my blessing to immediately leave and rectify that as soon as possible! Go now, pretty boy, and kiss Greeny right on the lips!
19. Snowball Fight
Yima: I've never been in a snowball fight before, I don't know the rules.
Luthias: What?
Yima: Like, is there a point system or is it to the death?
Luthias: ... *backs away.*
20. Water Fight
Maurice, runs in when Daren in the kitchen: Alpha and Saphire just challenged us to a water fight!
Daren: Great!
Maurice: Are you coming?
Daren: I am, just waiting for the water to boil.
Maurice: ...
21. Fettuccine
Arta: So uhhh... my question is: my friend keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked...
Saphire: I would hope he's not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!
Vience: In your pantry!
Arta: Yeah... and eating them raw, and he keeps calling them 'chips'. How do I make him stop?
Saphire: Is your friend here?
Arta, motioning to Tobias: Yeah.
Saphire, to Tobias: You're a monster! Words MEAN things!
Daren: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab 'em out of and chew-
Daren: HOLD ON! WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO THE OLIVE GARDEN AS KIDS?!
Daren: NO, STOP! EVERYBODY SHUT UP! DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN?!
Everyone else: No.
Daren, to Saphire and Vience: YOU FUCKING BASTARDS!
Saphire: YAAAAAAAAY!
Vience: THE PRESTIGE!
22. Two Words
Tobias: Okay, help me please!
Vience: Got two words for you.
Tobias: I bet they won't be helpful.
Vience: Your problem.
Tobias: I was right.
23. Snake
Tobias, holding a python: Guys, I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him?
Vience: You did WHAT–
Arta: William Snakespeare.
24. Snacks
Arta: I told Saphire to grab snacks for everyone.
Daren, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?
*Arta, Saphire, and Vience raise their hands.*
25. Black Belt
Vivi: I actually have a black belt.
Daren: In what, karate?
Vivi: No, from Gucci.
26. Hoe
Arta, gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?
Saphire: Yeah, sure.
*A few minutes later.*
Saphire: Here you go.
Arta: ...
Saphire: ...
Iris: Why am I here?
27. Birthday Gift
Tobias: What did you get Arta for his birthday?
Iris: I got him a potted flower.
Tobias: Really? Me too!
Daren: I also got him a potted plant.
Vience: Looks like we had the same idea.
Vivi: Saphire, please tell me you didn't get Arta a potted plant as well!
Saphire: ... I got him a potted cactus.
*later.*
Arta, in his room surrounded by potted plants and flowers: This is the best birthday ever!
28. Updog
Emy: Everytime I hear someone talking about updog, I'm torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.
Teiron: Okay, but what is updog?
Elwa: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.
Thundy: Not, that's a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.
Arta: No, that's an update. You're thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.
Icy: Surely, that's Uppsala, where's updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.
Emy: That's Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.
Thundy: You're thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.
Elwa: No, that's an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.
Teiron: What's a henway?
Emy: Oh, about five pounds.
29. (Lewd) Math Problem
Emy: Thun-kun! I can't do this stupid math!
Thundy: What's the math problem?
Emy: Well, we have to add the bed, subtract the clothes divide the legs, and hope we don't multiply.
Izca, covering Carmel's ears, while Thundy smacks Emy on the head: Not gonna lie, that was hella smooth.
30. Cheese
Elwa: Excessive amounts of melted cheese in food is gross and needs to stop as a trend.
Emy: Anyways, while this loser is living a sad cheese-less life, I'll be melting a wheel of sharp cheddar cheese directly onto my naked body.
31. Hot
Thundy: This food is too hot, I can't eat it.
Emy: You're very hot, and I still eat you.
Everyone at the picnic table: *silence.*
Teiron: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!
Elwa: One lunch... I just want ONE LUNCH!
Icy: *secretly laughing at the chaos.*
32. Snuck Out
Teiron: Elwa, I know you snuck out to see Cullen last night.
Elwa: If you tell Emy or Icy, I swear I'll murder you, and they'll never find the body.
Teiron: Five thousand Peso?
Elwa: Fine.
33. Twister
Three cats are playing twister.
Naoto: Right hand red.
Tsuchi: *ends up on top of Marinka.*
Marinka: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?
Naoto: I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice.
34. Kiss
Rina: Truth or dare?
Edward: Dare.
Rina: I dare you to kiss the cutest person in the room.
Edward: Hey, Stella.
Stella, blushing: Yeah?
Edward: Could you move? I'm trying to get to Mira.
35. Cauliflower (or Ghost Broccoli?)
Steve, holding a cauliflower in front of Jean's face: What is this?
Jean: ... A cauliflower?
Steve to Rina: Now tell him what you think it is.
Rina, arms folded: Ghost broccoli.
36. Small Talk
Rina, walking to Marin: What's for lunch?
Marin, eating: Food, generally.
Rina: No, I mean, what are you having?
Marin: An unwanted conversation.
37. Narwhal
Ashley: Why do you have a picture of a narwhal on your wall?
Ney: I just think mythical creatures are neat.
Tumma: Ney, narwhals are real.
Ney: ...
Ney: NARWHALS ARE REAL?!
38. Water and Ice
Duco: Papa Molf, what's it like when dating Papa Zen?
Molf: Once I asked for a glass of water when he was mad at me.
Molf: He brought me a glass of ice and said "Wait."
39. Late-Night Grocery Run
*In the chip aisle at the convenience store, doing a late-night grocery run.*
Donna: *minding her own business, looking for tortilla chips.*
Donna: *finds tortilla chips.*
Zen, to Molf: See, she knows what she's here for. She knows what she's doing. Be more like her. Make a decision, Molf!
40. Virgin Oil
*at the supermarket.*
Chilla: All right, the last item on the list is "virgin oil."
Chilla: ...
Chilla: Wow. Imagine being an item and still being called a virgin.
41. Ring Bear(er)
Salem: Okay, I'm gonna get the wedding cake.
Chilla: While Salem do that, Chilla will check on the ring bear.
Salem: ...
Salem: You mean ring bearER, right?
Chilla: ...
Salem: Chilla, look me in the eyes and tell me you are not gonna bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.
42. Dating
Rendy: Guys, I've been meaning to tell you all… Ilia and I are dating.
Ilia, Yubi, Salma, and Salem: *gasp.*
Rendy: Ily, why are you surprised?!
43. People Who Don't Live Here
Edgar, walking into his house: Hello, people who don't live here.
Rendy: Hey.
Salem: Hi.
Salma: Hello.
Chilla: Hey!
Edgar: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Hendry: We were out of marshmallows.
44. Running
Hendry: *running away from Edgar and screaming.*
Edgar, getting out of a car: Why are you running?! WHY ARE YOU RUNNING?!
45. Crying
Salma: So how's parenthood treating you?
Edgar: It's fine, I just didn't expect all the crying.
Salma: Well, the twins are still young, I'm sure it's completely normal.
Edgar: No, the kids are fine. I was talking about Edward.
Edward, sobbing while hugging Elliot: He's just so cute!
46. Last Second Word Switch (or Not)
Edgar, stubbing his toe: Ow, son of a bi-
Salem, motioning to Elliot and Sammy: Edgar! Children!
Edgar: ... iscuit. Son of a biscuit.
Salem: Nice save.
Edgar: Yeah. Fucking nailed it.
47. Child Toy
Eugene: Does she want a hot wheel or a Barbie toy?
Naya, holding Sammy: Um, she's a girl.
Eugene: Congratulations. Does she want a hot wheel or a Barbie toy?
Naya: Um... She wants a girl toy.
Eugene: Don't we all...
Naya: ...
Eugene: ...
Eugene: So does she want a hot wheel or a Barbie toy, you have to choose.
48. Ghost and Toast
Salem: I turned out perfectly fine!
Naya: Salem, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.
Salem: I DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN!
Hendry: *nervously sweating in the corner.*
49. Accidental Cursed House
Rendy: Hey, can we stay in your house tonight?
Arie: Why?
Rendy: Edward fiddled with an ouija board and cursed his brother's house.
Salem: Edgar doesn't know how to banish spirits, so he just throw salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"
50. Kissing Experience
Glinea: Arie kissed me!
Yubi: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!
Glinea: It was unbelievable!
Yubi: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!
Ilia: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Yubi, get the drink and unplug the phone. Glinie, does this end well or do we need tissues?
Glinea: Oh, it ended very well.
Yubi: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!
Ilia: Okay, alright, let's hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, "I gotta have you now" kind of thing?
Glinea: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
Ilia: Ohh... So, okay, was he holding you? Or was his hands on your back?
Glinea: First he started out on my waist and then he slid up and then he was in my hair.
Yubi and Ilia: Ohhh.
*meanwhile.*
Arie, eating pizza in his house: And, uh, and then I kissed her.
Rendy: Tongue?
Arie: Yeah.
Salem: Cool.
To Be Continue, bukan Toro Boko Colo (?)...
Yeah, itu saja.
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