a/n: Track 10: Labyrinth. short one again, these next few chapters cover short spans of time.

Chapter 8: Labyrinth

It only feels this raw right now

That's what Santana tells herself. She tells herself that the pain, the metaphorical wound of breaking up with Brittany only felt raw because it only just happened. That was the logical explanation after all. Breakups never hurt for long. There was always that initial loneliness, even when she'd gone out with Matt and Puck there'd been something. A slight twinge of rejection when they moved on, a rawness that seeing them didn't feel good. It felt weird to not greet each other with a kiss at their lockers. She knew her relationship with Brittany had been different than either of those, but she'd broken up with Brittany. It was for the best. It would certainly not hurt that much. Plus, it wasn't an official breakup. Just a short break. They'd come back to each other when Brittany graduated. No matter what- or who- happened in between. So when she returned to Louisville single, she was determined to be fine. It was easiest enough to forget about anything else going on with classes and cheerleading. Keeping busy was the perfect way to be fine. Sure, she dreamed about the moment she broke Brittany's heart every single night, her watery blue eyes, the ring she'd fished out of the trash and hidden in her nightstand. But she was fine. Plus, Brittany wasn't completely gone from her life like the case had been with her previous breakups. They still talked all the time. She promised to come see Brittany perform in Grease. She tried to qualm the blonde's fears about the end of the world. It was good. It was like how they were as friends, except they weren't making out and having sex. So what? This was friendship, and it kept Santana's head above water.

You'd break your back to make me break a smile

Finn asks Santana to come back to McKinley to be their Rizzo in Grease. She's not really sure how they failed to find a Rizzo, but she gladly agrees. It's one of her dream roles, and Rizzo's song There Are Worse Things suits her voice incredibly well. Of course, the real reason she agrees is to see Brittany. Texting was great, but she missed seeing that beautiful face everyday. She wondered if Brittany had something to do with her being called. It didn't matter, she'd do anything for an excuse to see Brittany. And so she did. She gladly agreed to come back and perform. As she's getting ready to go out and sing, the blonde who haunts her dreams appears. Brittany makes it clear that she's not dating anyone, and she still wants them to be together, and even reveals that them being apart does hurt a little bit even though "it's okay". She also reminds Santana that the song is sad, and that she needs to think of something sad, like them not being together, to sing it. That hits Santana deep. Mostly because that's exactly what she's using to channel the emotions, but she didn't think Brittany was hurting that badly. I mean, she knew initially it would hurt, but she really didn't want to hurt Brittany. The dancer didn't deserve it. But apparently she had. And that was one of the worst things she could do. But there was one that was worse, like the song said. "But to cry in front of you, that's the worst thing I could do." And when the last song comes around, the words stick with Santana. Brittany is the one she wants, the one she needs. The only one. But she won't go back now. The break is what the need, even more than each other.

How'd you turn it right around?

Just as Santana thought things weren't going to be okay, that she was going to break down if she didn't get back together with Britt, the blonde fixed everything. When she went back to Louisville, it was as if the conversation backstage had never happened. And that was for the best. Brittany told her all about the superhero club Blaine had started at McKinley, and the trouble with the Warblers. Santana said she'd go all smooth criminal on them if she had to, but then Finn gave her a better option. It had long been agreed that everyone would come back home for the holidays, and unlike Rachel and Kurt, the rest of the graduates kept their promise. Not only was it going to be great to see Quinn and Puck again, the only two who hadn't been involved with Grease, but she had another excuse to see Brittany. Deep down, her intentions weren't perfect. A couple mumbles of her and Sam flirting had found their way to her, and as much as she said it'd be okay, it definitely didn't feel that way. She wouldn't reveal that her intention was to show Brittany that she was better than Sam could ever be, but in her heart it would be there. She hadn't fallen out of love with Brittany through the breakup. It actually seemed to intensify her feelings. Knowing that if Brittany wanted she could date anyone, it was absolutely unbelievably painful. And Trouty Mouth? God, he would hurt the most. Because she could see them as a cute couple, just like Sam and Quinn. Brittany always liked Sam, never more than friends previously, but she saw it. So yeah, she'd help Finn in training up the younger Glee club members, but her other intentions might come into play too.

Oh no, I'm falling in love again

Just seeing Brittany was part one of her plan. Complimenting her was part two. Make it clear that she was still the only one who saw Brittany's star quality. Lastly, with a little unbeknownst help from Quinn, show her the chemistry only they could have by performing together. Sure, she was using her other best friend in her diabolical plot, but that wasn't really out of character for her was it. This should seal the deal that Brittany wouldn't get with Sam. Plus, she'd be part of the key to their Sectionals win as Marley's, the club's rising star, personal coach. That would definitely be the cherry on tip of her perfect, completely flawless plan. Definitely. She had no doubts. This would work. What could possibly stop it? Well, maybe Finn's terrible song choice of Gangam Style and the fact that no one could keep up with Brittany in such a huge dance number, but then again, Mike was around to work his magic, and if he didn't, Santana could pin the loss on him. Or on the White Chocolate, who claimed he was a good dancer because he could do body roles and worked in a strip club. As long as Marley did what she was supposed to do, Santana could reap the rewards of Brittany. Well, she wouldn't really get back together with her- she still believed the break was the right decision- but it would be enough to keep her hooked. Santana was like drugs, you could try to quit cold turkey, but eventually you'd come running back. Everyone else always did, even Finn. Not that anyone needed to know that. Her plan was working perfectly, Brittany wasn't flirting with Sam, and according to Tina, her inside source, the blossoming feelings seemed to have been put away. It was going to work. Her plan was going to work. And then Marley, and although she was talented, ruined everything by passing out on stage after falling for Kitty's nasty tricks and becoming bulimic. She'd foolishly left the last part of her plan in the hands of an insecure highschooler, and she'd flush them down the toilet with her non-existent lunch. Santana knew now that Sam and Brittany would cling to each other for emotional support in the wake of an unexpected loss. And she'd be forgotten by Brittany. Because she should've stopped Marley. She should've known. She'd dealt with similar problems before. How could she have missed this? How could she have let them lose? It was over. For good. That wound she thought would start to heal made itself painfully obvious as she went back to Louisville in search of her own Sam, something she knew she wouldn't find.

I'll be getting over you my whole life.