Chapter 15 – A Past Full Of Goodbyes

Amber's POV

Numb. Numbness and shock. That's all that I'm able to comprehend. I'm not sure how I was able to gather all of the information that I needed to from that call, but I manage to hold it together. After I end the call I'm still frozen in place as I have silent tears running down my face while I sit on the edge of the couch. I jump as I register Rosalie's hand softly stroking my back before she finally just wraps her arms around my shoulders as she pulls me back down onto the couch. I turn around and cried myself to sleep in Rosalie's chest.

When I wake up Rosalie is still holding me close. I'm pretty sure that is the only reason that I was able to get any sleep. Over breakfast I fill in the Cullen family about the phone call that I received last night.

I tried to explain how Cody and I had met through the foster care system and how we had wound up in a few homes together, but we lost touch when we were about 14. It was pure dumb luck that we ran into each other a few years ago while we were down at the Special Warfare Training Complex in Lackland Air Force Base at the same time. Colt, who is a mutual friend of Cody and mine, is the one who called me last night to inform me that Cody had been killed in action.

I'm emotionally exhausted as I make my way into the Sere Unit morning meeting. The announcement was made about Cody being killed in action. Since Cody was a TACP not many of my fellow sere specialists knew him, since in our career field we mainly work with pararescue personnel for the most part.

The 4 of us that did know Cody were given permission to take a few days of leave to attend the funeral. What surprised me is that Carlisle asked for permission to take leave so that he could attend the funeral as well.

We were going to try and catch a military hop, which is the term used when a military member or a military dependant uses a military airplane for personal transportation, to get to Utah where the funeral will be held, that is until Carlisle told us that we would be welcome to accompany his family in the jet that they will be taking. Turns out that Jasper, Emmett, and Edward all have pilot's licenses and the family usually rents out private jets whenever they need to travel.

Cody's family opened up their homes to all of his military friends so that we would have a place to stay and get ready for the funeral.

Everything is pretty much a blur for me over the next few days. We landed in Utah late Tuesday night for the funeral which would be held Wednesday morning.

I had never had an opportunity to meet Cody's family, but that didn't seem to matter, because as soon as I introduced myself I was immediately pulled into a hug by his adopted sister followed by his adopted parents.

His Mother Kelly, Father Ronald, and Sister Becky told me that Cody hardly ever talked about his life before they adopted him, but the few things that he did talk about were his birth parents and me.

His father informed me that in Cody's will he requested I be in charge of his burial detail, which just means that I would in a way be head pallbearer.

After I worked out some of the details, we all decided to retire to our rooms even though we knew that we wouldn't be able to sleep.

The Cullen's, I and 4 TACP friends of Cody were staying at Cody's family's house while a few of the others were scattered around at other houses or nearby hotels.

I took one of the couches, because I knew that I wouldn't be sleeping very much that night.

Rosalie's POV

I could hear Amber pacing again for the umpteenth time tonight and I have to remind myself that my presence wouldn't help my mate. As sad as that thought made me I realized that we haven't reached that point in our relationship where I would be more of a comfort than a nuisance to my love. I also know Amber well enough to realize that she isn't use to leaning on people so crowding her wouldn't help her. So I'm left to do nothing but listen from upstairs to Amber's pacing as I silently send her all of the love that my heart could pour out.

Amber skips breakfast the morning of the funeral, which said a lot about how my usual bottomless pit of a mate was holding up, in favor of making sure that her uniform was in top shape for the funeral service.

I walked into the living room to find my mate trying to button up her light blue dress shirt, but her hands were shaking too badly for her to be able to get the top buttons buttoned properly.

I slowly walked up to my other half and I carefully finish buttoning up her last 3 buttons and softly wipe my hands around her shirt to get all of the excess wrinkles out.

She walks over to her blue jacket and takes it off the hanger and before she had a chance to button it up herself I begin to button it up for her. I took the lint roller off the coffee table and made sure that her uniform was spotless. Amber put her hand on top of my hand when I was fixing her collar and as we made eye contact I could see years of pain and loss that the passing of Cody has brought up as she simply said "Thank you".

All too soon we were walking into the church. I could tell that Cody was deeply loved by the sheer amount of people that showed up to pay their respects.

Amber sat close to the front since she was apart of the burial detail. While my family and I sat towards the middle.

The service was full of love and tears as everyone said goodbye to a soul that obviously made it his mission to give the world some light in the darkness and that left this earth far too soon.

I shouldn't have been surprised that the last person to get up and speak was Amber. I couldn't get over the way that Amber looked in full uniform. Even in her obvious grief she looked like a vision sent from heaven.

She was the definition of pure sex and oozed a raw natural power that made me truly weak in the knees. I guess it's true what they say about a military uniform being irresistible.

I realized that I needed to focus or I would miss the speech that Amber would be making in tribute to Cody.

Amber stood at the podium and took a deep breathe and said. "Mornin' everyone. Most of you know me, but for the few that don't, I'm the reason why no one is allowed to repel off the schoolhouse down at Lackland." I was confused but I realized that there was story to that statement, because everyone broke out into soft laughter throughout the church. Amber gave a small smile as she looked around the room. "That's right, that was me. My name is Amber Blacole. Cody and I have known each other since we were kids. We had lost touch as teenagers, but by a miracle we were able to find each other again a few years ago. As you can imagine we were ecstatic to finally be able to reconnect after so many years. Unfortunately that also meant that we picked right back up where we left off, which meant that we proceeded to execute the most ridiculous shenanigans that the schoolhouse had ever seen. Which says a lot considering all of the tomfoolery that goes on there." Every military member laughs to themselves and a few of them high five over loving memories that they all shared. I realize that there is so much that I don't know about my mate. Not just about her past, but her likes and dislikes. Her hopes and dreams. I decided with renewed strength to learn everything I can about my soul mate. I tune back into the end of Amber's speech.

"Cody has always been strong and on more than one occasion he's been a rock for me, just as I know he has been the same for almost everyone in this room. And just like a rock if you throw it into the water it creates ripples. Those ripples are the after effect of every act of love and happiness that Cody created throughout his life. Those ripple will live on just like his legacy, for no one shall die as long as people still speak of your name." Amber Turns to Cody's casket and says softly but with so much conviction. "I won't ever be able to express to you how much you mean to me. We've been through hell and back long before we had ever truly seen war firsthand. You will always be with me just as I will always be with you. I love you Cody…Till Valhalla." There was a loud echo of "Till Valhalla!" that was yelled back by every military member in attendance, Jasper included, Though his was a much quieter response, but that didn't mean that it held any less emotion. Amber kissed the palm of her hand and laid it on Cody's casket as she made her way back to her seat. The rest of the funeral service seemed to fly by.

All too soon Amber stoop up and loudly announced "Detail ten-hut!"

The other pallbearers stood at attention as they filed out and made their way to the flag draped casket with military precision. They donned their berets. The other's all had black TACP beret's while Amber had on her Sere beret. Keith Urban's cover of Burden began to play as they lifted the casket and began to slowly make their way out of the church as everyone stood and slowly followed behind.

As I briefly looked around there wasn't a dry eye as the true meaning behind the lyrics began to sink in. I also noticed that my family and I had our own misty eyes.

In order for a vampire to cry they have to be under extreme duress. We can get misty eyed from an overwhelming emotion trigger.

The car ride to the cemetery was eerily quiet. It broke my heart to know that Amber was in so much pain that she didn't even want any music on. Music was something that I knew comforted and was a constant for my mate and for her to actually turn off the radio before she put the vehicle into drive spoke volumes.

Edward's POV

As I stood with my family as we watched as Amber assemble the burial detail once everyone was settled at the cemetery. The swirling thoughts of not only loss but of the love that Cody seemed to invoke in those in attendance were almost too overwhelming. I wasn't sure how Jasper was able to withstand the onslaught of the emotions.

As I briefly look at Jasper I can see from his face that he has taken this loss on a truly personal level. I never truly understood the brotherhood that is often talked about in association to members of the military. How even someone from a different branch of service or from different generations can feel so connected to each other, but hearing Jasper's thoughts and those of the other military members around me I think I am finally able to appreciate the bond that truly has unfathomable depths.

The 21 gun salute seems to echo and pound inside my chest with each shot fired. The military precision and dedication to detail is evident in every fold of The American Flag.

It's almost as if the military discipline that every member is executing is a direct representation of their respect to not only their fallen, but also to his family and the country that they have all sacrificed so much for.

I watch as memorial push-ups are performed and then every military member lines up as each member pays their respect to their friend.

What confused not only me, but most of my family, is that everyone took off their beret and removed their flash attached to it. After they removed it they placed it on the coffin and pounded their fist on top of it so that it became embedded into the casket.
At our confusion, Jasper explained that it is tradition to bury their loved one with a piece of themselves. Usually that means a patch, a badge, or in most special operation units cases their flash off their beret, so that they will forever be buried with what's most precious to those left behind as well as those that were lost.

Once the service's concluded my family and I were unsure about what was going to be happening next. It seemed like everyone was going to be meeting up for the next traditional event. I just wasn't sure what that tradition was.

"Amber, where is everyone going? Is there another gathering happening?" I confusedly asked.

"We're all headed back to Cory's family's house. We're about to have the Military Reception." Amber replies.

"You make it sound like that is different than a regular reception." Rosalie states.

"It is different. We celebrate the life. There's more stories and laughter mixed with our tears…..Not to mention more liquor." A new voice answers with a grin.
"Brian, it's been a long time." Amber says as she turns and they exchange a brief hug.

"Everyone, this is Brian, he's one of Cody's best friends. Brian, this is the Cullen Family. Carlisle is the new Doc down at the Sere Clinic back at Fairchild." Amber introduces everyone.

After the introductions we made out way back to our vehicles. It's another long and silent ride back to the house. We aren't sure what to expect from this Remembrance Ceremony, but we do know that it will be full of love.