The Princess and the space cowboy Chapter 88: Guilt (part 2), a loud house fanfic

Chapter 88: Guilt (Part 2).

- Please, seriously, I was only getting something for my dads, just… please, step aside - Clyde continued looking to the floor, struggling with all of his might to avoid the stare of the person by his side, blocking access to the door, he briefly touched the handle, trying to force it open.

- I already stood aside once, I remained frozen, motionless, as I watched the group of people that used to mean my life walk away from that mall, without ever looking back - Lincoln said with difficulty, clenching his fists.

- … - Clyde remained silent, stuck in his position while still trying to force the door open.

- You know, my therapist also told me to stay away from things that give me grief, to focus on "healing" - Unbeknownst to the ebony man, Lincoln actually mustered a small grin while confessing his secret to him.

- Then, you should know, to let go of the past - Clyde said weakly, still stuck in his position.

- …and move to another place, forget about everyone and start a new life? - Lincoln completed his phrase, to the ex-friend's dismay.

- …Well, you don't need to forget about family… I didn't forget about my two dads - Clyde spoke, though mostly to himself.

- Exactly, I didn't forget my family - Lincoln stated with confidence - Which is why, I couldn't forget about my only real brother - He finished with a kind, melancholic tone, making the man by his side finally lift his face to watch his former best friend for the first time in years.

And Lincoln saw his face as well, a soft beard that had not been shaved In a while, the same nerdy, rounded glasses of their childhood days, a pastry white uniform that gave a glimpse to his profession as a chef, and a look of despair that was almost clouded by the slight fogging around the lens caused by his own tears.

His own heart broke.

- I've been looking for you, bud, but even I know, I don't really have any rights to do so - Lincoln said sincerely, with the unequivocal frown of raw guilt.

Lola had long ago stopped her arguing with Flip, as both she and Lana exchanged a look of concern, neither decided to do anything about it.

The less Clyde noticed their presence, the better.

- … You're right, you don't have any rights to do so, why even bother? - In a turn of events, Clyde raised his voice, angrily.

- Feelings aren't rational, Clyde - Lincoln answered calmly.

- … -

- … Let's go outside - The pastry expert said calmly.

- Only if you promise you won't run or call the cops on me - Lincoln pointed with a raised eyebrow.

- You know, I could make a promise, but what value is there on making one… when they can be so easily broken - Clyde mentioned gloomily.

- heh, you're right, I can't ask you to make a promise - Lincoln admitted sarcastically - well, I can make one though, if you run, I will chase you, even if I get killed by the traffic or by a cop -

- You can't force me to be your friend again, Lincoln - Clyde narrowed his eyes in clear discomfort.

- I know, but I still need you to listen to what I have to say - Lincoln insisted.

To which Clyde said nothing, as Lincoln simply decided to step aside from the main door, allowing the ebony man to walk outside, closely followed by the albino.

Once outside, Clyde turned around and crossed his arms with a raised eyebrow, sporting a serious expression.

- Better be quick, I need to hurry before it's night time - He said drily.

And Lincoln stood in front of him, for once filled with a hefty degree of insecurity, barely knowing how to start.

But he figured the basics would work.

- I'll cut to the chase - Lincoln prefaced with a sigh - …I'm sorry - He said while looking to the ground - I'm really, REALLY sorry - he intensified his speech - I'm extremely, painfully, sincerely sorry Clyde - He continued while bathing in unapologetic guilt - I was a terrible friend, no, I was a terrible excuse of a human being! I became obsessed with a single goal, and me, being the obstinate, tunnel visioned, compulsive-obsessive idiot that I was, decided that everyone and EVERYTHING that didn't side with me was automatically against me - Lincoln started tearing up as he continued - How could I? They were either obstacles who disapproved of my beliefs… like Stella, disgusting mirrors to my feelings, like Liam… or just… rebellious pawns to my plan, like you, Clyde -

The chef twitched his left eye a little at that last statement.

- I am a weirdo who fell hopelessly in love with his little sister Clyde - Lincoln looked to the floor in shame - a 10 year old girl on top of that - he shrieked with pain - …but hey, I was the good guy, right? How could the innocent, good brother and "hero" of the town Lincoln Loud be such a degenerate right? - He looked seriously at his ex-friend - …Don't think, for even one moment, that I didn't immediately recoil in disgust for even thinking that I could be like that - The albino continued with disdain to himself - So what did I do? Of course! I convinced myself that that wasn't the case, I wasn't In love with Lola, that… jealousy of mine was justified! Because Fernando was obviously the child predator right? - Lincoln chuckled slightly at the ironic speech - Oh, and Stella was a bad girlfriend, that's exactly why I fell out of love with her right? - He continued rambling, his feelings out of control - Or how about Liam? That guy was hitting on Lana, he was awful too, right? - His mind pausing one moment, as he managed to breath slowly - … and, my "best friend" Clyde, who stood up for them, he was betraying me too, he called me a monster, me, Ace Savvy, a monster, when I was just saving my sister like the hero I am -

- … -

- … I remember, when you told me to: "Not hold things for too long", I, of course, didn't listen, because… what I was holding was, beyond unacceptable -

- … -

- Then again, I did tell you about my dreams, and that story, but according to you, I was "Taking things out of context" - He mentioned gloomily - but you know what? … that really helped, Clyde, you really did help my mood back then - Lincoln continued rambling, this time, looking with a serene expression at the nerd - The problem is - He returned to a more somber demeanor - I continued thinking that, well after it was clear, that it was no longer the case, when even she confessed in no uncertain terms… that she loved me. - Lincoln confessed among a sea of regret - …When even I knew… that I also felt the same -

- … -

- I'm sorry, Clyde, for everything, to you and to… the others, I was, an still am, a moral degenerate, far from a hero, but perhaps, the most disgusting action that I ever made in my life, was to lie and use my own brother just to protect my own, pathetic ego - He finished, still with slight agitation and pouring emotion.

The ex-friend took a good look at the agitated and weak state of the white haired man in front of him and stood still for a minute, hiding his expression.

And then, to Lincoln's confusion, he pulled his cellphone, and swiped on something.

After that, the ebony man calmly hid his phone In his pocket again, and quietly spoke, looking firmly at his ex-brother.

- Sorry for that, I had to stop the recording - He said, putting the albino in alarm - man, I'll be honest, I started recording in fear that you would attempt something to hurt me - He admitted with a poker face - … trusting is hard, dude - He sighed - …Do you remember what a Clincoln McCloud promise was - He asked with a visible frown.

- "An oath that shall never be broken, for it would mean the end of our lives" - Lincoln recalled with utmost accuracy.

- And what happened? - Clyde continued with a harsh tone.

- … I broke it - Lincoln admitted with shame.

- So what does that mean? -

- It's the end of our lives -

- Exactly - Clyde sighed, as he started turning around.

But Lincoln wasn't done yet.

- … My life as I know it ended, Clyde, that's true, when we made our first Clincoln McCloud promise, we were Ace and Jack, I outgrew Ace, then we became spies like David, and I guess that also died - He spoke with nostalgia - Our old lives ended, I can't even see myself as a hero anymore, I am… an anti-hero, at best, dude - Lincoln continued - I am flawed, made HUGE mistakes, and couldn't even bring myself to fix everything that I ruined - He rose again to eye level, seeing that his former friend was paying attention once again - But please know, from the bottom of my heart, that if there's a thing that I want as much, if not more, than fixing my entire family, is to at least let my brother know that I would want nothing more than his forgiveness, even if our old lives are over - He confessed with profound regret.

And Clyde stood there for at least a minute, analyzing the expression of his former friend.

He then spoke in a serious mood.

- … Do you even remember how to make a Clincoln McCloud promise? -

- Well… it was sort of like a normal pinky promise -

- I mean the extended one? - Clyde rephrased his question, annoyed.

- … You raise your right arm, open your palm, and stand solemnly - Lincoln recited while doing the exact movement - then your best friend states an oath, and you repeat after him - He continued.

- I, Lincoln Loud - Clyde spoke, mimicking his pose to the complete shock of the albino.

- I, Lincoln Loud - Lincoln followed, uncertain but also fully intending on following the game.

- Promise to NEVER again withhold the truth and scheme against his best friend, Clyde McBride, no matter how awful the truth may be - Clyde continued with a serious expression, which Lincoln repeated after - and will listen to and respect his advice, however small it can be - He followed - because he knows and understands that his friend always meant the best for him, even in crime and strife - Clyde finished and waited for Lincoln to finish the oath.

- What comes after? - Clyde asked suspiciously.

- We clench our fist - Lincoln said while producing the action, flabbergasted at seeing the man in front of him doing the same thing - …to make a quick fist bump - followed by the action, as the albino continued staring in disbelief - … and then we open our hand and flail it around - he said with a slightly broken voice.

- while making a silly explosion sound effect with our voices - Lincoln said with tears in his eyes.

*phew*

- … -

- Wow, I actually thought you had forgotten -

And for once in half a decade, Lincoln saw a smile in the face of his one brother, as well as a potential flood of tears behind the foggy glasses.

- And if you break this promise, Lincoln, I swear I will edit this audio and give it to Katherine Mulligan - Clyde stated in a jokey manner.

- Come on Clyde, I know you wouldn't be able to do that to someone, I myself will do it - Lincoln commented ironically, but fully intending to go through.

And just then, the least manly hug in the history of humanity occurred, as the two grown men simply remained stuck in place while shedding tears and boogers non stop.

- … So, does that mean? - Lincoln asked tentatively after breaking the hug.

- Apologies accepted, um -

- Triton, rogue space cowboy turned knight turned duke, a chaotic neutral individual -

- Right, and, uh -

- I finally found sergeant Cloud McStrife, former second in command, now first captain of the galactic federation -

- Right, that's who I was in your story? -

- …yeah, I guess I didn't find the rest of the crew, but at least I found their main chief in command -

- … -

- Where are they, by the way? -

- … Stella moved back to the Philippines to pursue a career in engineering, Zach moved to Alabama because his parents found out about "alien sightings" over there, Rusty still lives here, but we really don't talk much anymore, he seems to have another group of friends, and Liam, well -

- He suddenly cut contact with all of you and stayed in his farm right? - Lincoln complemented his speech.

- Yeah, how did you know that? - Clyde pondered.

- Let's just say, I know at least that side of the story, which is why i'm trying to find a way to cover for Lana's pregnancy - Lincoln admitted while rubbing the back of his neck.

- Lana WHAT!? - Clyde exclaimed.

- Shh, calm down dude - Lincoln shushed him - I told you I had a weird feeling with those two, just because I overreacted doesn't mean that everything was normal from that side -

- Right, and Lana wants to keep his identity a secret? -

- Yeah -

- So that's why you're with the twins right now? -

- Well, that and the fact that we're a few hours away from enacting "Operation: Make amends" -

- Heh, you finally thought of a shorter name for your operation -

- Clyde… -

- Right, sorry buddy, and what's your plan all about? - Clyde asked curiously

So Lincoln decided to explain the full length of his and Lola's plan to his reunited friend, stopping by to make Clyde understand the fine details.

- Well, that's kind of risky don't you think? What if the majority doesn't agree? - Clyde commented to the insanity that Lincoln and Lola had concocted.

- It's the most likely scenario, and I am ready to face the music - Lincoln agreed sadly.

- Well… - Clyde pondered - …Can I tag along with you on this one? - He said shyly.

And Lincoln looked for a moment in complete disbelief.

- You said it yourself, Lincoln, Our old lives are dead, see, I no longer live in Royal Woods and I'm going to leave soon with my wife to Canada, I was just passing by to spend some quality time with my dads before leaving - Clyde admitted sadly - So, for old time's sake, mind if sergeant Cloud McStrife assists Triton in one last Mission? - Clyde said while making a militant salute.

Lincoln, expectedly made a sad expression to the knowledge of Clyde's departure, but he still couldn't avoid the shock for what he was offering.

- … you mean it? T-there's going to be pure chaos in there, not exactly for the faint of heart bud -

- Clincoln McCloud have faced all kind of threats buddy, we have fought killing ro-bros, zombie apocalypses, fruit terrorists and recipe thieves, surely a brawl in the family is no big deal? -

- A-and your dads? -

- Eh, it's oh, I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend with them -

- …Ok, but, we're not exactly the good guys here bro -

- I know, but the galactic federation is neutral, and I'm acting on my own here anyways - Clyde reassured with a smirk - I'll be the one who got too "friendly" with your sister, sounds good? -

- …Would you seriously put yourself through that for me? - Lincoln contested with disbelief - …after all I've done to you? -

- Wouldn't really accept an apology if I still had reservations -

- But… dude, Lola and I… -

- I know, and I understand, being and only child may have something to do with that, but honestly, I don't find incest that gross - Clyde reassured his friend with kindness - …as for the age gap, well, I did have and unhealthy obsession on your oldest sister for awhile, so I don't really think I'm exactly qualified to judge you for that. - He admitted with a slight blush.

- …right - Lincoln confided with slight cringe at the memory, but was still overall in the moon for having the support of his reunited best friend - I didn't deserve a friend like you dude -

- I'm probably going to do your therapist's job here, but pinning all the blame on yourself is not healthy either buddy, you yourself said it, feelings aren't rational - Clyde reassured his friend while placing his hands on his shoulders in a comforting manner.

- Right, that's the lesson that I keep reminding Lola from time to time - Lincoln recalled with lost eyes - When did you become that strong? - Lincoln questioned sincerely.

- …hard times make for strong men - Clyde commented sadly - wouldn't you agree? Mr. Millionaire? -

- H-how did you know that? - Lincoln shrieked with his eyes wide open.

- The moment I saw that orangextrade domain, I just knew who it belonged to - Clyde reassured with a smirk - Plus, that Range Rover over there had to belong to someone right? - He teased Lincoln with an all knowing look.

- Dang it, Is there anything I can hide from you? - Lincoln asked mildly annoyed.

- Not anymore buddy -

- fuck, then I guess it's official isn't it? -

- say it -

- Clincoln McCloud is back! - He said while bumping fists with his friend - *phew* -

Once inside the building, the reunited brothers went back to the counter, were the twins expected them with eyes wide-open in anticipation.

Then, in a swift movement, Lincoln approached his girlfriend and stretched his hand to assist her in gentleman fashion.

Lola took the gesture while looking weirdly at her brother.

- Bud, I guess we don't need presentations, but this is Lola, my girlfriend - Lincoln said with full confidence while stealing a quick peck on the lips to his sister, making her flinch wildly and quickly retract herself from his hold.

- Lincoln what the heck! W-we are in public - Lola shrieked uncomfortably.

- Don't worry sunshine, he knows - Lincoln asserted with hilarity.

- It's definitely a sight that is hard to get used to, but your secret is safe with me - Clyde folded his arms with an all knowing look, making Lola relax slightly - yours too, Lana - he directed his attention to the other twin.

- I hope so… - Lana said begrudgingly to Clyde's comment.

- Well, not for me chief, I don't know ya bozos, but my silence will come at a price - Flip, whom everyone had forgotten about, raised his voice while rubbing his fingers with dollar signs in his pupils.

And this time around, it was Lincoln who calmly reached over to the counter with an almost evil smirk, shocking the greedy man.

- Flip, it was really nice of you giving us those Flippees for free - Lincoln stated with a weirdly intimidating tone while taking his Flippee from the counter - But, if this gets out of your store, I'll make sure that the health department knows about the exact content of Plutonium in these drinks, the FDA will be delighted to hear the news, don't you think? - He finished with a sly smile while taking a sip of the drink.

To which Flip immediately entered alert mode and switched to a different manager while changing the slogan of his store.

- Ayo, I really don't know what you kids talking 'bout, this is ol' Phillip's greens and beans, we only sell the healthiest food available on the market - The greasy man said with a different accent while breaking a sweat.

And from the counter, Lola could only watch with immense pride and adoration to the exchange that just occurred.

- He's learning so fast~ - She cooed in a love trance, holding her hands on her heart.

- Oh boy - Lana and Clyde thought simultaneously, hoping to never again be on the receiving end of that duo.

The car had stopped, the pilot and the three passengers were now looking through the window to a place that seemed virtually unchanged from the outside.

A two-story tall house located in 1216 Franklin Avenue, to the side was a garage, at the front, a bunker and a tree, which for some reason still had a toy plane stuck in its leaves, on the front porch you could still see some toys scattered on the grass, and on the roof, a boomerang and a frisbee could be seen laying there, virtually abandoned.

Yet they knew, as chaotic as the outside looked, it would be child's play compared to what awaited on the inside.

They had arrived to the final destination.

Just a few footsteps later, the group of four where standing on the entrance, the only thing that Lola had to do was to knock on it.

But of course, preparations had to be made.

Lincoln approached his noticeably quivering girlfriend and hugged her from behind, getting his mouth close to her ear at whispering distance.

- Ok sunshine, stick to the plan, this is about you and Lana, I'll be close by with Clyde while you give me the signal - He whispered softly.

- I know Lincoln, please… take care and don't let any of them see you yet - The ex-pageant competitor recomposed -

- Don't worry, I do want to catch up with him first - Lincoln said a little more loudly while breaking the hug.

But before he could fully leave her side, Lola turned around and buried her head in his chest while forcing a hug on her own.

- … -

Lincoln stood there, not quite sure of what was going on in her head.

- What's wrong Lols? - He returned the hug and spoke kindly, caressing her hair with a free hand, forcing the girl to look up.

- I… don't know if I can follow through if this goes wrong Linc - Lola gathered the courage to speak, an intense look in her face as she focused on his eyes - it's just… A part of me wants to fix things with them, but I… - She retired eye contact - I don't know what I want to do now -

And Lincoln, now spurting a look of serenity, kindly grabbed her chin to make her look at him.

- Lola, we promised to give ourselves a chance again, and that includes our trust in them - He said calmly while caressing her check.

- But, Lincoln - Lola stressed again - I don't know why, I have a bad feeling about this - she said with an intense look in her eyes - I know this sounds selfish… but right now, an even bigger part of me just wants to leave this behind, if they don't understand, then fuck them! - She began letting a fears droplets of emotion fall through her eyes - I just… don't want you to get hurt again Linky, and I don't want to… well… you know -

And the brother, now overwhelmed with emotion as well, intensified the strength of their embrace.

- Sunshine, we have worked hard just to be standing here today - He whispered to her ear again - It's time to trust the ones that support us, we are not alone anymore remember? - He said that last phrase a little louder.

Enough for the sister behind them to hear.

- Yeah, you can count on us now Lols, we stick together no matter what, alright? - Lana stated confidently, approaching her twin and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Lola shifted her attention to her twin, and seeing a supportive smile on her end brought a bigger level of confidence within, enough for her to finally nod in approval.

- Ok, let's do this guys! - The girly twin said with renewed determination.

- That's the spirit! - Lincoln nodded, before letting go of her warm company - Uh, but first, may I borrow the book? - He asked incredulously.

- huh? sure, but what do you need it for? - Lola looked weirdly at her boyfriend with a raised eyebrow -

- eh, I want to show Clyde a few things before we get in - Lincoln answered nonchalantly, shrugging -

- You better not write weird crap Lincoln - Lola warned with suspicion before taking their special notebook from her purse.

- Uh, what's that? - Lana realized that they were talking about an object that was unknown to her, but seemed to be important for both of her siblings.

- It's something that I wanted to show you later, but Lincoln here spoiled the surprise.. - Lola rolled her eyes at her brother - …let's just say that it has a lot to do with what happened all these years - She turned to her sister and stated drily with her arms crossed.

- Oh, ok, guess I'll find out later, we're kind of running out of time here - Lana shrugged, expecting to know the details as soon as their "birthday party" starts.

- Good call sis, you guys better hurry up, we'll meet up later - Lincoln approved on Lana's insight and turned around.

- Wait - Once again, Lola interrupted his departure, making a slightly annoyed Lincoln turn around to face her again.

- Ok this is getting old Lol-

He didn't even finish his sentence, for his mouth was forcibly shut to the contact of Lola's warm lips on his own, as the girl violently tackled his frame to hug him again, a long and fervent display of passion that lasted for about a minute, but that the both of them wished, could have lasted an eternity.

After their lips departed, Lola looked warmly at her boyfriend, licking her lips with half-lidded eyes.

- Sorry, don't know how long I'll go without having my fill, these people are going to be all Loud and annoying if we do it in front of them~ - She said mischievously.

- Lola… - Lincoln, for once, was speechless, getting lost in her ocean blue eyes.

And now it was the ex-pageant goer than separated rashly.

- Ok, I'm ready, remember Lincoln, I need you to be close around, once I managed to organize them all, I'll give you the signal - Lola said proudly, pulling her phone to accentuate her point.

To which the man simply nodded in agreement, before walking away with Clyde to find a place to park his car better.

Now it was just the twins, standing in front of the door, Lola closed her eyes and shook her head, getting rid of all of her internal doubts.

She was going to do it, she was going to trust her family.

*knock* *knock*

And the entrance door was almost blasted open, by none other than the permanently stressed eldest sister.

She was agitated, but just by visually confirming that it was indeed the twins, she calmed down significantly, the other sisters and even the mother approached the entrance as well just to confirm their identity.

- Lola, Lana… it's really you - Lori stood motionless.

And Lola averted any further strong reactions, getting in front of her twin to hide her inflated belly.

- Hi girls~ - She cooed with a smirk.

Author's Notes: Woah, has it really been a year since I first posted the prologue of this fic? That's right! Last Tuesday was the first anniversary of The Princess and the Space Cowboy! Thank you so much to all of my readers for the support and feedback that you've been giving me all this time, I wouldn't have gotten this far without you guys. So what better way to celebrate than to have Lincoln and Lola return to their home after so much time?

We're getting closer to the end, but there's a few more obstacles that our protagonists are going to go through before everything is said and done, what do you think is going to happen next?

Until next time, cheers!