This was fun to write.
I hope it makes you all laugh.
"Sir, I think we need to have a serious discussion." Nathalie entered the office belonging to her boss. Gabriel sat at his computer, going over various designs as he addressed the woman without looking up. "The vote was three to one, Nathalie. Our supervillain team name is The Fabulous Fiends, and we are sticking with it."
His assistant shook her head. "A different matter, sir. One that involves your recent akumas." that got him to look away from his screen. "What about them?"
Pulling up a document on her tablet, Nathalie scrolled through the most recent akumatizations that occurred. "Frankly, sir, I think you've been running out of good ideas. Just this week, your creations have been; Mathterpiece, whose power undid any correct math equation-"
"-The kid was ten! You know children's problems are much simpler than teenagers!" Gabriel defended his choice of victim.
"Then there was King Pierre, who had the power to control anyone named Pierre."
"I thought there would be more people with that name." Gabriel sighed.
"And lest we forget yesterday's failure; Flusher." A toilet themed villain had been the final straw for the peacock wielder. Her boss paused, recalling the prior day's events. "... alright yes. That was horrible." He agreed, finally starting to see what his partner in crime was getting at. "So I've had a slump lately. I can't exactly outsource my akuma creativity…"
Gabriel stopped. He looked lost in thought. It did not ease Nathalie at all. "Which is why I've come up with some ideas that could-" she tried to get to her next point before her boss had another terrible idea, but she was too late. "Of course! There is a way to outsource my akuma creativity!" he began furiously typing at his computer, which Nathalie approached with dread. "Sir, please don't tell me that is [NonBrandNameSocialMedia]."
Sure enough, Gabriel had already signed in to his official Hawkmoth [NonBrandNameSocialMedia] account and had swiftly composed a long post. "It is Nathalie! Just take a look!" he moved aside to let her lean towards the screen. Her eyes narrowed as she read aloud, "Citizens of Paris, it is I Hawkmoth! For the first time, I am holding an official 'Design an Akuma' contest. Show me your best ideas and the grand prize winner will get to be akumatized into their creation! Runner-up gets an official Hawkmoth fanny pack."
"With this, I can take a break and let the public come up with ideas for me! Whichever gets the most likes wins!" Gabriel was proud of himself. He sat back in his chair and took a sip from his favorite mug. The young Tsurugi heir had given it to him at a formal dinner and it had beautiful Japanese writing on it. If he could read Japanese, he would have known the writing said 'World's worst parent'.
Knowing there was no way out of this debacle, Nathalie rubbed her forehead and stepped away from the room. In the empty foyer, Duusuu popped up over her shoulder. "What do you see in him?" "I ask myself that every day."
OXOXOXOX
"Have you guys seen the latest post from Hawkmoth on [NonBrandNameSocialMedia]?!" Alya nearly kicked down the door as she entered the art room. "About the akuma contest, yep." Marc couldn't restrain the smirk growing on his face, already coming up with ideas on how to troll him with his entry.
The majority of the squad was present, save for Kim, Max, Sabrina, and Luka. They all had their phones out and viewed the exact same post. "I can't believe he actually did this!" Adrien laughed. Like Marc, he had already started coming up with bad ideas to throw at Hawkmoth's direction. Even Rose, the sweetest of them all, was doodling a drawing of an akuma that's only power was to make Hawkmoth cry.
"We cannot pass up an opportunity like this. The winner is whoever gets the most likes, so if he follows his own rules, then he has to make the akuma. No matter what power it has." Marinette had the most devious grin of all (save for Alix) as she addressed her team. "And I think we're all on the same page on what kind of akuma we need to make."
"One that fixes global warming?" Mylene raised her hand, looking up from her drawing.
"One that turns Adrien's dad over to the CPS?" Nino suggested.
Juleka mumbled something as well, but it was unintelligible to all except Rose beside her.
"... I thought we were all on the same page." Marinette mumbled "I mean creating an akuma that takes out Hawkmoth once and for all!" "Way ahead of you Marinette, check out mine!" Nathaniel held up his art, detailing a supervillain who would seek out the most vile person in Paris (with a footnote in the corner clarifying that it means the most vile person who's not a teenage girl)
"Good one, Nath!" Zoe complimented his art before showing him her own. "Take a look at mine. This one's power is to gather every brooch in Paris into a giant pile at the Eiffel Tower. That way, we get the Butterfly and the Peacock back!"
A tiny bee floated over and looked over her chosen's art. "Wonderful idea, my queen! But you all need to see what us kwamis have come up with!" Pollen motioned for them to follow her over to where the kwamis were working on a collective painting together.
The heroes approached their tiny companions and stared at the masterpiece they had envisioned. "Ooh! It looks like a pinata!" Rose exclaimed.
"It is!" Mullo answered. "Our akuma can turn Hawkmoth into the world's most hittable pinata!" There were various murmurs of agreement, including the co-guardians making a mental note to have a Hawkmoth pinata made for his defeat party one day.
OXOXOXOX
Gabriel felt great about his idea. That's why he waited until right before the deadline to view the submissions. Surely the people of Paris would be eager to be akumatized into anything they wanted! And all they had to do was help him steal jewelry from a group of teenagers. He couldn't see this backfiring on him in any way.
"Something tells me you haven't seen any of the submissions yet, sir." Nathalie watched him stride confidently over to his computer. If he wasn't going to listen to her ideas, she wasn't going to give him a heads up about how his were going. "It wouldn't be fair to look at some before the rest. Sometimes the best come right before time is up."
Gabriel logged onto his [NonBrandNameSocialMedia] and eagerly looked through the tag for his contest. His face fell as he scrolled through the entries. "Nathalie, what am I looking at?" "The entries for the contest." She bluntly answered. Gabriel was crestfallen. He fell back into his chair. "How could this happen… all of these designs look so much cooler than the ones I've come up with!"
"And check what each of them does." Nathalie suggested.
Actually reading the entries, Gabriel's horror increased. "Why are all of their powers designed specifically to defeat me or steal my miraculous?!" he kept scrolling, reading out some of the entries "This one has the power to 'teleport Hawkmoth to the bottom of the sea'! And this one's power is 'creates a gihoogic arrow that points directly to his location'. At least use a real word! And this-OH DEAR LORD! This entry is so graphically violent! Who in the world would even think of making an akuma that did this to me?!"
Nooroo smiled.
"To be fair, not all of them are going after Hawkmoth." Nathalie watched his hopes rise "One of them has the power to report Gabriel Agreste to CPS." and she watched that hope wither away and die like the remaining respect she had for him.
Just when Gabriel thought it couldn't be worse, he remembered the rules of the contest. The most likes is the one he'll akumatize. He rapidly sped through the tag comparing likes until his assistant showed his there was a button to order them by 'most liked' and gaped at what was to be the winner. "Entry by marinettedesigned, this akuma is called Endgame. She has the power to take the heroes directly to Hawkmoth's lair and track him down wherever he goes. When in close enough range, she can activate her curse of the brooch and cause anyone wearing a brooch within 20 feet to lose consciousness." Not only was this design absolutely beautiful, but that was exactly the kind of overpowered akuma that would lead to his defeat.
"This cannot be the winner!"
"It is. This akuma has received over fifty thousand likes. Ladybug herself couldn't have come up with a better akuma designed to ensure their victory over you." Nathalie pointed out.
That can't be made real. He had to do damage control. He opened up the original [NonBrandNameSocialMedia] post and edited the rules of entry. "Master, isn't that cheating?" Nooroo pointed out.
"Of course it's cheating! I'm the villain, they should expect me to do this!" Gabriel shot back at the little butterfly. After adding a rule that no akuma can have a power that affects him, he scrolled back through the entries, "There has to be one entry that doesn't involve targeting me!... there! That's the winner!"
OXOXOXOX
The skies were clouded by a dark shadow, and riding upon that shadow was a lone figure "Beware Parisians! For I am the winner of the design an akuma contest… MRS. PIGEON!"