Chapter 13: Coitus Interruptus

Sebastian wasn't about to let on how desperately he wanted Kurt to ride him into the mattress. Just the thought of the diva holding him down and grinding away mercilessly until Sebastian exploded into that firm, perfect ass made him impossibly hard. "I doubt you're man enough for that, precious, but you're welcome to give it a try," he shot back snidely as he bucked his hips, eager to see Kurt's erection bob up and down on his stomach. Sebastian didn't use this position very often (the bathroom stalls in Scandals didn't lend themselves to lying down) but he was sure enjoying the view now.

Which was good because Kurt showed no signs of moving. In truth, his words of challenge had been false bravado. Now that the moment had arrived, he was more than a little nervous about impaling himself on Sebastian and wanted the other boy to coach him through it. But how could he admit that? He still felt humiliated and angry about the way Sebastian manipulated him into begging just now. Honestly, Kurt was finding the whole experience of navigating sex with Sebastian much more difficult than he'd anticipated. He never expected anything approaching sweet or tender, but he marveled at the Dalton boy's talent for relentlessly pissing him off.

Still, Kurt had to acknowledge he was learning a lot more from Sebastian than just how to properly prep someone, like how to tease and tempt and manipulate with his body and his words. So many new skills he could take back to Blaine. Of course, he wouldn't need to manipulate Blaine, they loved each other. No! he scolded himself. Don't think about Blaine again. Look how badly that turned out before. Kurt willfully ignored the way Sebastian was looking at him right now, like he was the world's most irresistible snack. A treacherous little voice in his head whispered, Blaine never looks at you like that. Kurt resolutely told that little voice to go fuck off and die. He focused on Sebastian's smug face and willed himself to move but nothing happened. Kurt felt his confidence slip away, even as he clawed to get it back. His erection softened.

Lovely as the view was, eventually Sebastian started to get bored. Hoping to goad Kurt into action, he made a big show of bringing his hands to rest behind his head and gave a great big fake yawn. "Any day now, precious. I'm a busy man and time's a-wastin'." He bucked his hips again for emphasis but this time Kurt's half-flaccid cock just wiggled weakly in response. Christ! thought Sebastian with annoyance, What's the problem now?

Kurt frowned with the effort of trying to push down his uncertainty, but to no avail. The power dynamic had shifted in Sebastian's favor during the rimming and Kurt just couldn't seem to get past that. He was suddenly overwhelmed by the realization that here, right now, with this caustic, cruel boy who hated his guts, he was about to lose his anal virginity – something he hadn't even contemplated or mentally prepared to do before they set foot in this tacky motel room just two hours ago. No firsts would be left for him and his sweet, caring boyfriend to savor together. How it was supposed to be. Instead, the whole thing would be rushed and angry and dirty – the way Sebastian liked it. The realization was devastating. It was heartbreaking. Kurt almost wanted to cry.

"Just ... give me a minute," he ground out, struggling with the effort to conceal how upset he suddenly felt.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. After all they'd already done, how could Kurt still act like such a bashful virgin? Determined to move things along, he dialed back the snark just a notch. "Look," he said matter-of-factly, "I can't exactly take the initiative from this position. Do you want to switch places?"

"No!" Kurt's eyes went wide in panic. The very last thing he wanted was to be at Sebastian's mercy while they did this. He already felt too raw and vulnerable as it was. Get a hold of yourself! You have to at least stay in control. "We had a deal," he insisted again, clinging to that phrase like a lifeline. "You agreed I could be on top." To Kurt's ears, it came out almost like a sob and he prayed Sebastian didn't notice.

Now Sebastian grew impatient. "That's right," he snapped back, "we had a deal. So giddy up, little bitch." Still the pale boy hesitated. Sebastian sighed again in defeat. Why was seducing High Maintenance Hummel such fucking hard work? Now in addition to Kurt's dick wilting, his own hard on was starting to soften.

Shit! Suddenly the look in Kurt's eyes made it all clear. Losing his anal virginity was actually a big fucking deal to Hummel. Sure, Sebastian had been nervous about bottoming, too, but he'd pushed past it. Evidently, Kurt couldn't. Turns out there was a limit to what angry sex between enemies can accomplish and they had reached it. Kurt's stubbornness and pride and determination never to back down had carried him so far, but apparently no farther. Suddenly Sebastian realized he hadn't been seducing Kurt this whole time, he'd just been goading him, setting lines in the sand and daring the other boy to cross them. And to Kurt's credit, he had crossed every single one with admirable skill. But that approach wasn't going to work any longer.

No one would ever describe Sebastian as sweet or, God forbid, caring, and tenderness was neither his forte nor his inclination. He didn't do boyfriends for a reason. Still, he'd suffered through enough execrable rom-coms during Warbler movie nights to know exactly what the countertenor wanted and needed. And Sebastian considered himself a pretty good actor. His goal hadn't changed – ruin Kurt sexually for all other men. He'd just have to go about it in a way that stretched beyond his comfort zone.

Placing his hands on Kurt's hips, Sebastian silently urged the boy to dismount him. Sebastian sat up and gently took that pale, smooth face in his hands. His thumbs caressed Kurt's cheeks and lips as he gazed intently into Kurt's eyes, marveling at how they shifted from blue to green and back again. It cost nothing to admit Kurt really was unique and gorgeous. But in that moment he looked so very young and uncertain. Sebastian continued to scan his face, searching in vain for the scalding hot angry, stubborn, infuriating bitch-diva who made Sebastian's cock twitch and his skin tingle. Where was that boy hiding? This tentative, timid creature in his hands Sebastian did not want to fuck even one little bit.

He leaned in and kissed Kurt with uncharacteristic gentleness. "I'm not going to hurt you, Kurt," he said softly. "You're plenty open, I promise, and this is going to feel fantastic." He wrapped his arms around Kurt, pressing their chests together, and kissed him again, just as soft. "We'll go slow," he murmured as he licked at Kurt's admittedly delectable mouth. "You set the pace, just like we agreed. You're going to love it, trust me."

Despite his fear, Kurt snorted. "Trust you? Trust the Craigslist Casanova? I'd sooner eat glass." Nevertheless, he clutched Sebastian tighter. He knew Sebastian was faking the tenderness – he'd made it abundantly clear he didn't care about Kurt's feelings. But still his tension eased somewhat at Sebastian's reassuring words. He so wanted to believe Sebastian.

Sebastian took his time, sucking on the countertenor's tongue for what felt to Kurt like ages, feeling the other boy relax in his arms and reveling in Kurt's sweet little moans. He reached between them and caressed Kurt's dick lightly with his hand, teasing it. "Come on, gorgeous," he purred. "Get hard for me again. Your so sexy when you're hard, it drives me crazy."

"Don't tell me what to do, Sebastian," Kurt gasped desperately, even as he felt his cock begin to swell and throb under Sebastian's ministrations. "I'm not a trained poodle."

"Ah, there's my little bitch," Sebastian smirked triumphantly. "Welcome back." He felt his own prick twitch at the sound of his name coming from those soft, pink, kiss-swollen lips. The thought of hearing it again, screamed by Kurt mid-orgasm, was enough to get him instantly rock hard. Skimming his tongue along Kurt's collar bone, he latched on to the shorter boy's neck and spent a productive few minutes giving him a series of impressive hickeys, whispering encouragements between each one. "I'll be with you all the way, handsome. We're in this together. I won't let anything bad happen to you, I promise. Do you believe me?"

Through a haze of lust, Kurt struggled to hold a coherent thought. And that thought was that Sebastian Smythe was so full of shit. There was no universe in which the boy who said he had a hard luck case of the gay face actually thought he was sexy or handsome or gorgeous. But did it really matter?

In truth, Kurt felt exhausted, not on a physical level but emotionally. Sparing with Sebastian was exhausting. Maintaining his defiant self-confidence every day in the face of relentless bullying was exhausting. Fighting Rachel, and now Blaine, for solos in glee was exhausting. Worrying about his father's precarious health was exhausting. Shrugging off the homophobic microaggressions of McKinley's teachers, and even his supposed friends, was exhausting. Fretting over possibly losing Blaine (to Sebastian) was exhausting. He always endured, he overcame, but it took pieces out of him. People say "It gets better," but a platitude doesn't really help you survive the day to day. Now Sebastian was offering a beautiful mirage – surrender to me and all will be well. It was a lie, but in a lifetime of Kurt E. Hummel never standing on solid ground, he decided that if Sebastian could pretend to desire him, he could pretend that was good enough.

"Yes," he said breathlessly. "I believe you."