Special Episode 7: It's Almost Been 3 Years It's Time For a Christmas Special

They've been watching me more than usual.

And acting weird.

Are they going to kill us?

Maybe...let's go ask Papa.

Why would your dad know if-?

"I can't take it anymore-" Emile groans from behind Mana and puts his hands on her shoulders to physically turn her around. "What do you want for Christmas!?" he cries.

Mana blinks. "Christmas?" she repeats.

"Yeah," Akane says, coming up from behind Emile. "Do you not know what Christmas is?" she asks with a frown when the confused look on Mana's face doesn't go away.

"Of course I do," Mana says, affronted. "That's the one day of the year Yutsuko let me outside with proper clothes." she says and suddenly a horrified look crosses her face. "D-Do you celebrate Christmas...?" Mana asks, her voice trickling down to a whisper.

Akane and Emile exchange a worried look.

"Mana..." Emile starts.

"What do you think Christmas is?" Akane asks.

Akane's and Emile's expressions slowly descend into horror as Mana proceeds to recount all the cruel atrocities Yutsuko would commit while she forced Mana to watch as her gift to herself for Christmas.


Somewhere at an unknown location…

Yutsuko's nose twitches.

She narrows her eyes.

Finn frowns. "The hell's wrong with you?"


Mana said the nightmares were worth the new set of clean clothes. Mana also relays Mary's recollection of her dear uncle Finn giving her a plate of cookies every Christmas while he spoke of the things he wanted to do to Cooley and her mother - and of course he couldn't leave out the very vivid and bloody description of the way he killed her mother.


Yutsuko and Finn sneeze in unison.

"Talking about me on Christmas, hmm…?" Yutsuko hums. "Oh Manami, we'll be together again before you know it…"

Finn sidles away from Yutsuko. "Fucking psycho…"

"Shut your mouth before I sew it shut." Yutsuko says with a smile. "Now, what were you saying about a new way to play with my pets?"


"...The looks on your faces are telling me that's not what Christmas is."

"...No, Mana, that's not what Christmas is."

"I guess this explains why Veiss never celebrated Christmas with us either..."


"Oh." Veiss says when Akane and Emile explain what Christmas actually is to the other former Revenant Beasts captive.

He tells them his gift from his captors was monitored free time outside all day...so long as he could beat them in (literal) freeze tag by dodging the freeze spells for ten minutes.

"Yeah," Veiss says. "That wasn't very fun to do barefeet in the snow but I did manage to win some years." he nods mostly to himself. "When I did win I got winter clothes to stay outside - I didn't get to keep them after though..." Veiss says and spares a glance at Mana. "Probably because my Master actually kept me clean. Something about outside contaminants ruining his experiments..."

"Probably. Yutsuko said being covered in blood built character." Mana nods sagely and rubs her chin between her thumb and index finger. "This version of Christmas seems much more fun." she agrees. "So all we have to do is buy people gifts?"

"That's part of it yeah." Emile nods.

"Can I buy myself a gift?"

"I guess." Emile nods again.

"Can I buy a hug from Kan-?"

"No."

"I take back everything I just said about Christmas."


A number of days later…

"EMILE!"

Emile screams when a pair of hands roughly drop down on his shoulders and forcefully turn him around. He comes face to face with a distraught Mana who then proceeds to shake him back and forth.

"IT'S HORRIBLE, EMILE!"

"Wh-What? What's horrible? What's wrong with you? Stop shaking me-"

"KANNY'S SICK!" Mana cries, letting go of Emile and dramatically throwing her hands up in the air.

"I thought you were a little psycho who likes it when she's sick?" Emile asks, steadying himself.

Mana scoffs and wags her finger at him. "No, I like it when she asks me to take care of her...which she only does when she's sick." she says matter-of-factly, putting her hands on her hips.

Emile raises an eyebrow. "In what other context would she ask you to take care of her...?"

Mana stares at him.

Emile stares back.

...

...

...

...

...

"...Anyway, Rina got to her first so now I have nothing to do so take me to the store please and thank you."

"Don't flat out ignore my question-"

"I have to do Christmas and Secret Santa shopping and Kanny says I'm not allowed outside alone so chop chop!"

"Ugh."


As Emile leads Mana through town, a thought comes to his mind. "Why not ask Veiss to take you? You could both have your first Christmas shopping experience together." he says.

Mana pouts. "I had the same thought at first but yesterday Veiss said he was all set with everyone's gift but Kanny's." she says. "I let him piggyback on my idea so in the end there really wouldn't be much shopping together."

"Ah," Emile nods and puffs his chest out. "So you came to the Christmas expert. Smart move." he says confidently.

The two of them walk in silence for a moment before:

"...So what are you getting Kanny?"

"You don't have a gift for her either?"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Fine."

"Yay!"

"Some Christmas expert…"

"What was that?"

"Nothing." Mana says quickly and changes the subject. "So, is there like an arts and crafts store around here or something? That's where I wanna stop first." she says.

Emile nods as they turn down the street. "Yeah, yeah, come on." he says. "So what are you getting me?" Emile asks excitedly.

"Isn't it supposed to be a surprise?"

"Yeah, but, y'know, it's my birthday and Christmas!" Emile exclaims. "Realistically I know everyone has to wait a whole year but it always feels like I have to wait the longest because my birthday is at the end of the year." he pouts.

Mana tenses. "Your…birthday…?"

"Yeah!"

"..."

"Mana?"

Oh dear, Mary says. Birthday, Christmas, and you're his Secret Santa. she says. Maybe it's a good thing I still don't have a body of my own.

Bite me.


"Sewing kits?" Emile questions as Mana picks one off the shelf. "I didn't know anyone at the guild liked to sew...let alone that much." he adds when Mana adds two more to her cart.

"Oh, no," Mana says. "This is for you, me, and Veiss."

"Oh, okay." Emile nods. Then, he pauses. "...Why? Is this for Akane somehow?" he asks as Mana navigates towards the fabric aisle.

Emile scoffs when Mana explains her idea to him. "...Whipped."

Mana gasps lightly. "How did you know?" she asks.

"Wha-? Oh my Goddess Mana, I didn't mean it like that-"


Christmas Day

Emile smiles giddily as his guildmates pile birthday and Christmas gifts around him.

Novem, wearing a tiny little Christmas hat and walking and jumping up and down on the towers of presents, stops suddenly and sniffs the air. "Emile," he calls. "I smell despair."

Marcus, who just added to the pile of presents, scoffs. "I bet it's the poor sucker who got stuck as Emile's Secret Santa on top of getting him Christmas and birthday gifts." he says grins. "Lucky that hasn't happened to me yet."

"Marcus-"

"Ahaha! I bet they stayed up the whole week trying to get all his presents together!" Marcus laughs loudly. "Oh Goddess, I hope it was-"

"Marcus."

Marcus stops when Novem looks behind him pointedly.

"M-Mana!" Marcus cries when he turns around to find the poor sucker who got stuck as Emile's Secret Santa on top of getting him Christmas and birthday gifts.

Mana gives him a strained smile. "Hi Marcus." she says tersely, three wrapped boxes in her arms.

Emile and Novem watch amusedly as Marcus struggles to remedy the situation: unable to decide between sticking with his usual logic of the situation being necessary to build character, trying to explain that's not what he meant, and just apologizing.

"What is it with Mana and bringing out the tsundere in people…?" Emile wonders aloud.

Novem laughs. "I dunno but it's funny as fu…dge." he finishes, shivering when he feels an unamused presence looming over him.

Rina glares down at Novem. "What have I told you about that potty mouth of yours, young man?" she scolds. "Do not let Emile's lack of self-awareness and stupidity-"

Emile frowns. "Hey-"

"-influence your vocabulary!" she cries.

Danate laughs, coming up from behind Rina and slinging his arm around her neck. "Oh come on, Rina, let him. It's Christmas!"

"Y-Yeah, no, right, totally." Rina nods, blushing furiously.

Meanwhile, Mana leaves her birthday and Christmas gifts in Emile's pile and adds her Secret Santa gift to the Secret Santa pile, also leaving behind a deflated Marcus who couldn't decide what he wanted to say.

She's about to join Akane in the infirmary (who's getting one last check up from Theresa) when she spots Alistair sitting at a table with his face in his food. Literally.

Is he alive? Mary wonders as Mana walks over.

As he's sitting with his head face down in his food, Mana picks Alistair's head up by his hair and winces when she sees the syrup and pancake bits sticking to his face. "Are you…like…okay?" she asks awkwardly.

Alistair groans. "I hate Christmas." he says blandly.

"Oh." Mana says. "Does that mean you don't want the present I got you?" she asks.

"...Bring it to me." Alistair says.

Mana nods and gently sets Alistair's face back down on his plate, retreating back to her room for his gift.

When she returns, Alistair's sitting up like a normal person and wiping his face clean with a wet paper towel.

Mana proudly presents him with a wide, flat wrapped present. "Merry Christmas, Alistair!"

Alistair raises an eyebrow as Mana giddily watches him unwrap the box.

"A dartboard?"

"Turn it over." Mana says, practically bouncing in place.

Alistair turns it over and gasps at the sight. "Mana…" he says.

Mana beams. "Yeah?"

Alistair wipes a tear from his eye. "I love it." he says. "A dartboard with that bitch's face as the bull's eye…it's perfect!"


Somewhere at an unknown location…

Rosalia sneezes, making everyone around her turn to gawk at her.

"Are you…sick?" Calypso asks, raising an eyebrow.

Kenji sneers, looking Rosalia over. "That'd be damn funny if she were," he says.

Devlio tilts his head to the side. "Perhaps you need more layers." he says, looking at the four jackets, three hats, two pairs of gloves, and thick scarf Rosalia has on.

"Don't be ridiculous." Rosalia sniffs. "Someone's just talking about me, probably." she says, adjusting her scarf. "The people love me after all."


"I hate her so much, thank you Mana!"


Rosalia sneezes again.

"Ugh, get away from me. I don't want to get sick on Christmas of all days." Calypso sneers and stands up. "Come on, Devlio, let's go see if Yutsuko will let us bother one of her pets."


"And…you should be all good to go." Theresa nods. "Your fever is broken and-"

"Her fever's broken!"

"YES!"

"GET HER!"

Akane freezes when she hears three particular voices at the door.

Theresa steps back without missing a beat and suddenly, said door is open and Akane is being jumped by three heads of black, white, and blue hair and she's thrown back onto the bed with three hundred pounds of her guildmates weighing her down.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS KANNY!"

"Get off-"

"Don't be shy, we made sure Mana would be the first one on you-"

"Do you want me to kill you on your birthday?"

"Emile said this was part of partaking in the Christmas spirit."

"I'll kill him and you."

Theresa yawns as she heads out of the infirmary. "I'll leave her to you three then." she says.

"Theresa-" Akane calls.

"Merry Christmas, I have to go find my daughter now."

"THERESA!" Akane cries.


After being shoved into her room, Akane only paces alone for a minute or two before her teammates return.

All three of their arms are full of wrapped gifts.

"Please tell me the squirrel didn't make you go crazy."

"Has your illness made you slow? Don't be ridiculous, these are our gifts too." Veiss scoffs and pushes the door open even further with his foot. "Move over and let us in."

"I-"

"Your little collection isn't a secret anymore, Kumiko. There's nothing to hide."

Akane grumbles embarrassedly and relents, stepping aside to let them in.

Emile grins. "Don't let his attitude fool you, Akane. It was his idea to open all of our gifts together." he reveals.

Veiss whips around and glares daggers at Emile despite the rising flush to his cheeks. "I'll kill you."

Mana puts down the gifts in her arms and opens up her arms towards Akane. "Merry-"

Akane frowns and grabs her wrists. "What happened to your fingers?" she asks.

Each and every one of Mana's fingers is wrapped in bandages.

"Ah..." Mana laughs nervously. "Turns out I'm not as good at sewing as Emile and Veiss. I think it still came out nice though." she says.

Akane blinks, confused.

Mana motions for her to sit down and Emile presents her with a giant box wrapped in teddy bear patterned paper.

"From all of us to you." Veiss says, trying to sound nonchalant and failing; his anticipation for Akane's reaction clear.

"Merry Christmas!" the three of them say in unison, the four of them sitting in a circle on the floor.

Akane narrows her eyes suspiciously at her teammates before unwrapping the present to reveal a simple box. Seeing the anticipation on their faces grow, Akane takes pity on them and rips the cover off the box.

Akane blinks, staring at the contents of the box: a stuffed white unicorn with a blond mane and green eyes, a stuffed blue hyena with gray eyes, a stuffed black squirrel with green eyes, and a stuffed black cat with brown eyes; all the perfect size and softness for cuddling.

"Do you like it?"

"It's all of us!"

"We all agreed that if you were an animal, you'd definitely be a cat."

...

...

...

...

"Are you blushing?"

"Cute..."

"I told you guys she had a heart in there!"

Their comments only make the blush on her cheeks get worse. Akane grumbles and hands each of them a box from her own pile.

Veiss grins. "She's so happy she can't even speak."

Akane carefully empties the box her new stuffed animals came in and throws it at Veiss' face.

Mana frowns curiously as she opens her present. "'Hug coupons'?" she reads. "What's that?"

Emile laughs at the embarrassed grimace on Akane's face. "Give her one and you can redeem it for a hug-"

"Oof!"

Emile and Veiss burst out laughing when Mana once again tackles Akane onto her back. Veiss picks one of the coupons up and laughs even harder, "Oh Kumiko, your first mistake wasn't putting a time limit on the hugs." he says and turns his eyes to his own gift. "Now, let's see here…"


Wisteria Village

This is by far Oliver's favorite time of the year.

Why?

Christmas?

No.

The cold weather?

No.

Wintertime traditions?

No.

Why is this Oliver's favorite time of the year?

Everyone comes home for Christmas! No more loneliness!

Well, everyone except for Shun, Eliza, Nimue, and Phoebe…who knows where those guys are.


The One Who Is The One looks down at said Silver Sabelum members behind the bars of their basement, a number of other people behind them.

"Please let us out…" Shun says tiredly.

"We've been in captivity for so long…" Eliza sighs.

"Master Oliver hasn't seen us in ages…" Nimue frowns.

"...I'm your creation so I don't care." Phoebe shrugs.

"You can come out when the business in Honeywell is finished." says The One Who Is The One and they turn back to their device and continue creating.


…Anyway, Oliver loves the holidays!

Surprisingly, Akito is among those who head back home to Wisteria for Christmas. He's rather tightlipped about his reasons for returning but hey, he's here so Oliver won't complain.

Saul and Kyza, however, seem to be up to no good.

Then again, those two are never up to any good during the winter holidays.

"What are they up to…?" Oliver wonders out loud as he surveys his guild.

"Kyza and Saul?" Koz questions. "What they're always up to around this time of the year." he says, leaning against the wall next to Oliver.

Oliver hums.

"Terrorizing Lenox."

"Ah." Oliver nods. "That seems about right." he says.

Meanwhile, said victim is trying desperately to avoid every trap the two of them set up.

What kind of trap, you may be asking.

Why, the best kind of wintertime trap.

Mistletoe!

Ever since the two of them found out about Lenox's particular feelings for their dear Guild Master, they've been hellbent on getting them together.

Saul mostly for the amusement of seeing Lenox's face turn redder than Oliver's hair and Kyza because deep down inside his little thirteen year old heart, he likes to think of Oliver as his big brother and he wants his big brother to be happy. He also cares just as much about Lenox and he wants her to be happy too. Who better to make them happy than, well, them?

Oliver's fairly stupid in regards to romance but Kyza feels very strongly about the fact that once it's right in his face, he'll realize.

…Hopefully.

Lenox has managed to avoid being caught under the mistletoe every year since they've found out but little does she know, this year they have a special trick up their sleeves.

"Lenox." Akito says, tapping the woman on her shoulder.

Lenox turns around. "A-Akito?"

"Follow me." Akito says and without waiting for a response, he starts walking away.

"Akito, wait! What's wrong?" Lenox cries as she follows after him.

("Look at them go, little man! We might've done it!" Saul grins.

Kyza beams. "Finally! When should we start planning the wedding?"

"Uh…slow down there. Keep an eye on them, I'll go get Akito's payment.")

Akito leads Lenox to the doorway of the Silver Sabelum kitchens. He points at the top of the door. "I dropped my dagger up there. I can't reach it." Akito says blandly.

"You…You want me to get it?" Lenox asks with a confused frown.

"Yes."

"But you're taller than me…?"

Akito stares at her. Then, he grabs his arm. "I hurt my arm on my last mission." he says and for added effect: "...Ow."

Lenox still doesn't quite understand but she acquiesces. She moves towards the door and tries her best to reach up and-

"Sorry." she hears Akito say and before she has a chance to react, he shoves her into the kitchen.

Lenox whips around to find her worst nightmare: Saul handing Akito a full 18" x 26" sheet of cake and a shit-eating grin on Saul's face.

"S-Saul, let's talk about this-" Lenox tries but Saul shakes his head and clicks his tongue, reaching out to tap on the air between his side and Lenox's side of the door, revealing a light green barrier between them.

"You shan't escape the shackles of love this year, my dear Lenox. Jutsu Shiki Magic from a friendly Wisterian, ha. You're not getting out of here until Christmas Day or until you and the Master do a little smooch under the mistletoe there." Saul says and pats Akito on the head. "You're dismissed, young soldier."

Akito, with the faintest hint of a smile on his face as he looks down at the cake, looks back up at Lenox. "Sorry." he says again and leaves with his cake.

Lenox gulps, her face already turning bright red. "Oh gods."


Koz and Oliver, in a very heated game of chess, are interrupted by Kyza.

"Oliver! Oliver! Come on, you've gotta take a look at this!" Kyza says as he runs up and starts tugging Oliver by his sleeve.

Koz sighs. "Should I even wait for him to come back?" he asks, turning in the general direction of Kyza's voice.

"Nope." Kyza grins and looks back at Oliver. "Come ON!" he says, shifting to tug on Oliver's whole arm.

Oliver sighs and shakes his head as he stands up. "What have you done to poor Lenny now, Kyza?" he asks, letting the young boy lead him.

"Nothing bad, I swear!" Kyza insists.

"Not even denying doing something to Lenox…"

Oliver frowns in confusion when Kyza leads him towards the direction of the kitchen. "Kyza?"

Oliver's eyes widen when he sees Lenox suddenly rush towards the doorway of the kitchen. "Oli, don't-!"

"Too late for that. Merry Christmas!" Saul says, emerging from behind the door and shoving Oliver inside the kitchen.

Oliver nearly crashes into Lenox when he stumbles into the kitchen but he manages to steady himself before he does. He looks down at Lenox and smiles. "Are you okay?" he asks.

Lenox, her face beet red at their proximity, only manages a squeaky "Mhm." as a response.

Saul reexplains the Jutsu Shiki for Oliver and he and Kyza stand there, waiting patiently.

Oliver smiles in a way that only Lenox finds charming (that way being stupid). "Oh, I don't think Lenny wants me to touch her like that." he says.

Saul and Kyza facepalm.

They're trying to get them together but come now, they're not so cruel as to just expose her feelings. If that's the route they wanted to take they would've done that years ago!

Oliver smiles again and turns to Lenox. "The Jutsu Shiki doesn't say how, so…" he leans down and Lenox nearly passes out and Oliver places a gentle kiss on her cheek.

And the Jutsu Shiki disappears.

And Kyza and Saul stomp their feet, displeased.

And Lenox passes out.


Arkcester City

Hours before Christmas Day…

"Yuki."

"Miss Suck Up."

"Let them go."

"Why should I?"

"Because it's Christmas."

"Eh."

"And the bandages make him feel better."

"...Eh."

"Yuki." Luna whines.

Yuki laughs, rolling around on the ceiling of Glinda's office. "Man, I dunno, Luna, it's pretty fun to see you all worked up." he grins. "But, since it's for my dear buddy Cole, I'll give them back." Yuki says and drops Cole's bandages. He laughs again when Luna has to scramble to catch them before they hit the ground.

"How's the Christmas party going anyway?" Yuki asks. "I've been here for a while now but the celebrations of the Goddess never seem to compare to what I've seen back home." he says, floating down and landing in front of a still annoyed Luna. "Is drinking all you guys really do in her name?"

Luna huffs. "Well, if you ever bothered to be up and about during the daytime, you'd see that we've done much more than just drinking." she says indignantly. "...Why are you never around during the day when it's time for celebrations?"

Yuki gives her a mysterious look, "I do my own thing." he says and by the tone of his voice, it's clear he's not going to elaborate.

Luna sighs and turns on her heel to exit Glinda's office. "Well, whatever." she says. "I have better things to do than let you annoy me."

Yuki pouts as he follows after her. "What, like play that spot the difference game with Eira?" he asks.

Luna bristles. "Yes. It's a harmless game." she says.

Neil had the brilliant idea of getting the drunk guild members to try and guess which girl is which as a little game - as the two of them already look remarkably alike while sober, it'll be harder to tell who's who while drunk.

Luna returns the bandages to a grateful Cole and walks over to the bathrooms to get changed into the identical outfit provided by, once again, Neil.

"OH MY GODDESS GET OUT!"

"Sheesh, no need to yell." Yuki yawns.


Eira and Luna stand side by side as their drunk and tipsy guildmates survey them.

"You know," Eira says. "I know I'm not from here but I'm not entirely sure what this has to do with Christmas and the other celebrations." she says to Luna.

Luna shrugs. "Arkcester does their celebrations and prayers during the day so we can do what we want at night. It's not as famously known as her other remarkable deeds but Soasis was also famous for-"

Regine pokes Eira's forehead, narrowing her eyes and making Luna stop. "This one is Luna."

"No." Eira says dryly.

Regine grumbles and moves to the side to let someone else go.

Luna clears her throat. "As I was saying-"

Seinaru, much much more drunk than Regine but still appearing sober, puts his hand on top of Luna's head and makes her stop again. He stares silently at her, the only sign of his drunkenness being the dazed, faraway look in his eyes.

"...Mother?"

"Seinaru, I have seen pictures of your mother and I do not look a thing like her. Go to bed."

Seinaru mumbles incoherently to himself for a moment before nodding and trudging off to the side.

Luna sighs. "If you're really interested, we can finish this conversation later." she says to Eira.

Before Eira can respond, the sound of Glinda's drunken maniacal laughter fills the guildhall. Eira and Luna turn to see Victoria trying and failing to make a grab for Glinda's neck, as every time she gets close, Glinda sends her through a portal that opens up a few feet away. Victoria's swearing cuts in and out every time she runs through another portal.

Sitting at the bar nearby, Cole plays a holiday tune to accompany Glinda's terrorization of Victoria.

Glinda suddenly stops when a loud bell rings outside and instead of sending Victoria through another portal, she grabs her by the face and holds her at arm's length while Victoria swears and tries grabbing at Glinda. "It's time." Glinda says ominously.

Eira looks at Luna wearily. "'Time'?" she repeats.

Luna laughs at the look on her face. "It's nothing bad." she says. "Come on."

The members of Aberrant Hydra start to gather around Glinda (and consequently Victoria) as if they were waiting for the bell.

"Merry Christmas, Aberrant Hydra!" Glinda says happily. "Now, for those of you who are new here, as is Aberrant Hydra tradition, you will now go around the room and announce what you would like for Christmas and I, as Aberrant Hydra's Master, will do my best to give that to you for all your hard work during the year!"

Cole raises his hand. "May I go first?" he asks.

Glinda beams. "Of course! It's Christmas!"

Cole nods and clears his throat. "I would like Xander's head please." he says seriously.

Glinda stares at him.

Cole stares at her.

Glinda snaps her fingers, opening a portal above and below Cole, and he once again starts to repeatedly fall through the portals over and over and over again.

"Who's next?" Glinda beams as if Cole wasn't screaming right next to them.

Neil raises his hand excitedly. "Can I go on an S-Class mission with somebody?"

Regine, still quite tipsy, raises her hand. "I would - I would like that too." she hiccups.

"I'll see what I can do about that." Glinda nods.

Seinaru raises his hand. "I want to make a murder."

"...You what?"

"I want…a Dark Mage."

Yuki juts his thumb at Seinaru. "I want whatever this guy's having."

Seinaru frowns, trying to find the right words. "...Justice." he says.

Glinda stares at him.

Seinaru stares at her.

"He's going to fall on his own." Glinda says and right as she says so, Seinaru passes out and drops his head against the table he's sitting at.

"Right, who's next!?"


Back in Zaflior…

"...Did she fucking fall asleep?"

"Yeah."

"Yep."

"Zzzz…"

PF x AH x SS

A/N i needed a break from writing teenagers trying to solve a murder, investigate a murder, and magic fights you're welcome

merry chrysler and happy birthday to emile's, novem's, kyza's, danate's, rina's, calypso's, and luna's father, my brother, other senpai

now it's your turn to update xx