Bleeding Heart- Jimi Hendrix

Death Letter Blues- Son House

The Big Three Killed My Baby- The White Stripes

I was running. My feet were bare, toes only skimming the mud as I flew across the ground. I easily wove around trees. Branches slapped and broke against my ankles.

Destruction. I left only ruins in my wake. I couldn't avoid every insect that tunneled through the earth, couldn't skip around every life-giving flower. I could only hope that my efforts were successful. That the fate I was being led to saved those I loved from the same destiny. Whatever awaited me in the vast chamber ahead, I left behind only destruction- Rose, who never wanted this existence of eternity; Alice, lost in the world somewhere with no direction only because of my mistakes and separate forever from her brother.

Her brother. My love. My heart. I was never good enough. I could only hope that this last sacrifice could buy his protection.

I wondered if I would get a final wish. Whether I was left in my rooms to starve into insanity, or simply destroyed immediately, I would like to see the sun again. It had been so long- I was in Plato's Cave, desperate for Socrate's sun. But I wondered if that gentle warmth was beyond me now, when instead I was burned my the fire in my throat.

Time somehow moved so slowly. I had only just stepped out of the door from my rooms, Felix's hand gently on my elbow as though to guide me forward, or hold me up. My body felt stiff and I walked mechanically. It was a wonder I could move at all, trembling as I was.

I wondered what I would do, in the coming moments? Could I beg for my last wish? Would I beg at all, or stand tall and strong like Carlisle would want? I was the existing embodiment of it, the picture of what my dear friend had once dictated should be the depiction of despair- "The last act of despondency is, when a man is in the act of putting a period to his own existence. He should be represented with a knife in one hand, with which he has already inflicted the wound, and tearing it open with the other. His garments and hair should be already torn. He will be standing with his feet asunder, his knees a little bent, and his body leaning forward, as if ready to fall to the ground."

I didn't think I could hide the state of my self. I always was an open book- it was one of the only reasons Aro allowed me so close despite my mind being unreadable to him and my loyalty being unchangeable by Chelsea. I had no pride left- I would beg for my life if possible.

Only my steps echoed through the cold stone halls, too heavy to mask. Jane was far ahead of us, and I knew Alec couldn't be far away. The entire castle was buzzing with the sounds of camaraderie and livery, but only silence lay before me.

Jane didn't even need to pause, the large and heavy doors swung open and she strode right through them without missing a step.

I hesitated. I couldn't see them yet, but I knew all three would be there. The knife was in my hand, my wounds were already open for them to see. There was nothing more to do. I strode forward as steadily as I could, and Felix's hand fell from my arm.

They don't really reside in a room- that word is far too pedestrian for such a space. The ceilings soar eighty feet high, the walls and floors pure, shining marble. A mural of domination and bloodshed was painted and perfectly maintained, rivalling the Sistine Chapel in precision and remarkability.

But nothing was so intimidating as the men who lounged on the carved thrones in the center of it all.

Caius was sitting straight up, his spine rigid and his vivid scarlet eyes narrowed as he glared. Carlisle and I had left without his leave- it seemed he had not forgotten or forgiven. His pitch-black cloak hung in stark contrast to his pale skin and snow-white hair that hung to his shoulders. The oldest among the Volturi, almost the oldest of our kind save Amun, but he looked younger than I felt.

Aro sat in the middle, and he was leaning forward, expression alight in curiosity with no detectable malice.

But it was Marcus whom I was drawn to.

He sat on Aro's left. His skin was as papery and translucent as his brothers', his red eyes carried that same milky film that told their ancient age. He looked as young and handsome as any of our kind, especially adorned in rich black silk and surrounded by the most luxurious fineries.

But his smooth face was expressionless, hiding his deep and unsoothable grief.

I finally understood. I had read the Confucian Analects dozens of times- the capacity for grief was defined as an ethically valuable trait. If that was the only metric by which we judged ethics, then our kind would certainly be the most virtuous of creatures. My mate was still alive- I knew in my bones that I would have felt if something had happened to him. Marcus, though, knew his was dust in the wind. If I thought that the tearing fire in my throat was bad, I knew it couldn't be even remotely compared to the pain he endured simply by... enduring.

"Isabella!" Aro greeted joyously, leaping to his feet and striding to me gracefully for a light, quick embrace. I steeled myself to refrain from flinching when his crepe-like lips brushed my cheek, his hand pressing lightly in mine. "Still nothing," he laughed, shaking his head. "I don't know why I was hoping that time would have changed this. It changes so little of us."

"I'm sorry to disappoint, especially after such a long absence," I whispered, my voice cracking with dryness.

"Nothing about this could be disappointing," Aro promised assuringly, touching my hand one last time before returning to his seat.

"Pleasantries aside, there is business to attend to," Caius said sharply, directed towards Aro as much as to myself.

"Ah, yes. Our young friend was just telling us all about your little adventure on your side of the world," Aro said pleasantly, waving his hand towards the corner. I turned, glancing around Felix's hulking figure to where the doors had closed behind us.

In the shadows stood a tall vampire I had met only once before in Seattle, and he and his nomadic companions disappeared as quickly as could be expected. Honey-gold hair, skin covered in luminous crescent scars, stood Jasper.

He looked as uncomfortable as I felt, and was staring at me with wide dark eyes and an expression that I couldn't read.

"I don't know so much about 'our' side of the world," I said carefully. "But I'm sure his was an accurate representation."

"I'd like to hear from you, as well," Aro said, voice bright and unaffected. It looked as though his smile would crack through his papery-thin skin.

"Yes, you've been waiting for us for some time, haven't you?" Caius said coolly.

"It's been nice to catch up," I said, still staying as calm as I could, though I knew if it was possible that my heart would have been beating out of my chest. "I left a few books here, after all. And it's been so long since I left, you've all been up to so much."

"And you as well!" Aro exclaimed. "When you left, it was just you and Carlisle. Am I to understand you've added three more to your ranks?"

"To our family, yes," I corrected carefully. We were not the same as them. "Esme is Carlisle's mate, and soon after we changed Emmett and Rosalie."

"Quite a large coven," Caius commented quietly. His sharp eyes were boring into me.

I had been waiting for this. I knew what needed to be done. I glanced around the ornate room, surveying the unchanged scape. Jasper was the only figured out of place, all the rest was the same as it had always been. The marble floors were cold and clean and smelled of the blood of thousands of victims who had been soaked into its surface. I was trying to keep my conscious mind afloat and separate from the thirst, but my hand was almost trembling with the temptation.

It wasn't as if I wasn't going to fall to my knees and begin licking the floor. I wouldn't give them the satisfaction.

"Carlisle changed Esme because he recognized her as his mate. It was a natural addition. Inevitable, even," I explained. I could hear Demetri speaking softly to someone on the other side of the vaulted doors about the nightly patrol schedule, but I knew he was also listening. There were no secrets here except for the ones Aro kept for himself. "He and I came across Rosalie fourteen years later. She had been attacked and was almost dead in the street. And..." I sighed as if in hesitancy, as if I hadn't had over three months to carefully construct my every word. "She reminded me of my sister. My human sister."

"Beatrice! I remember her," Aro sighed fondly. I gritted my teeth and forced a responsive smile. Aro looked over to Marcus expectantly. "She was the subject of that de Predis piece in that collection from the Pinacoteca Ambrosiana that we had loaned here for us to admire. Yes, I remember how much you loved her, even if I did not know you then. The words you wrote of your grief... they were profound."

I swallowed. Of course he had read those letters. It was one of the casualties of existing in history, no matter how minor. Letters I had written had been preserved, and I knew exactly the one Aro was referring to. She had passed after my change, and it was a moment I would never forget.

"'When I think of what a loving, honored, and only sister I have lost, I am so much oppressed with the burden of this sudden loss that I know not how I can ever find comfort'," I quoted for him, sparing myself the pain of hearing my own words in his mouth. "Rosalie is my sister now as well, bound in venom as Beatrice was in blood."

"So she resembled Beatrice, then? She must be quite beautiful."

"She is," I confirmed. "She reminded me more of her socially, as well. We knew of Rosalie when she was human. She was always the center of the social scene, always donning new fashions and attracting admirers from wherever she went. So you can see how I drew the comparison."

Aro nodded. He had his hands clasped together in front of him and was leaning forward in fascination. Caius looked bored, and Marcus, as always, reticent.

I continued. "She's a reluctant addition, but she found her mate in Emmett, and they're well suited to our lifestyle choices."

"It seems your ideology is spreading," Aro commented lightly, but his eyes flickered over to Jasper.

"Carlisle offers support to anyone who shows an interest, but, as you know, we've been largely unsuccessful."

"You managed to convince dear Eleazar to go along, though. And we do miss him here."

"I'm not sure that had as much to do with Carlisle and I as it did Carmen, but Eleazar is always happy to visit."

"Unlike you," Caius pointed out shortly.

I nodded in deference. "We haven't made it back across the ocean in a long time. But what is a few hundred years, in the grand scheme of things?" I shrugged, struggling to maintain a casual disposition I did not actually possess.

"But a flash in the pan for some of us, and most of an existence for others," Aro said jovially, catching me in a corner.

"I have plans to be around long enough to make that a flash in the pan," I said casually, giving Aro a small but innocent smile. Hope is a thing with feathers- maybe I could fly away from this bloody and violent hell. Had Felix been trying to tell me something more? Or was that whole encounter a hallucination as well? I couldn't be sure.

"I should certainly hope so, my dear!" Aro said jovially, clapping his hands together once.

"I am curious about the nature of a newborn army, especially one so close to you," Caius said.

"I don't know where they came from, or why they were created," I said.

"They were created for chaos and control," Jasper said, his voice steady and smooth. "You are aware of my history. I have no doubt that in the wake of the bloody battles for the South, migration northward was inevitable. Seattle provides cloud coverage and easy movement, it was an obvious target. I'm honestly surprised that no one had moved in on it sooner."

"Sense is made, brother," Aro said to Caius.

"And of the way they were deposed of without our input or consultation? So that some even escaped?"

"I would have assumed Demetri would easily lead you to them, given that he was in the city when this happened," I said dryly. "But I did manage to track down and destroy one of them. The other is still out there, but I'd imagine her no more capable of destruction and exposure than any other lone newborn."

The lies came easily, surprisingly so. I didn't think anyone could sense my betrayal, and relaxation swept over me.

"You, tracking?" Jane snorted. Aro's head snapped to look at her, and she appeared immediately admonished for speaking out of turn.

"I know it was never my strong suit, but they were young and volatile. It wasn't difficult to follow them, though one did get away from me."

"How?" Aro asked.

I shrugged, falsely casual. "I can only guess she has some latent gift for evasion. I was preoccupied with burning her companion and she skipped off. I lost her scent after only a few miles, which was odd, and she left no trace."

"Evasion, how interesting." Aro said.

"Is it? I wasn't very motivated to track her down again, given she bares little threat. I'm sure Demetri could find her with no issue."

An obvious ploy, I was making. Maybe Aro would deploy Demetri and Felix to find Victoria, and they would destroy her quickly. No threat would exist to him any longer, with Victoria disposed of once and for all.

"That's an idea," Aro agreed, and I could feel that strange bird called hope flapping its wings hurriedly, "Demetri did encounter this newborn, after all. And maybe an evasion gift could provide a welcome challenge to him. Everything comes so easily to him, since you've left us."

"I'm apologize for that inconvenience," I whispered. "My progression has equally stagnated, I assure you. Though, I would say the lack of use of my gift is a good thing, wouldn't you? Threats are so few and far between. The violence of our history has stabilized. Immortal children have been eliminated, werewolves hunted to extinction, our secret is safe."

"Newborn armies seem to be a continuous threat, though," Aro contemplated, mostly to himself.

"There are survivors of those Southern Wars out there, patrolling and monitoring," I reminded him. "Jasper has partners and friends. And this is the second I've heard of in the last hundred years. I'm optimistic the threat is minimal."

"You do not wish to return to this sort of patrolling?" Aro said, his gaze suddenly piercing through me. "Demetri and Felix would appreciate your contribution. And we have so many new members who could learn from you, could be more readily tested with your gift."

I breathed deeply, burning my throat with the scent that hung heavily in the air. Venom no longer came. I wondered if it was drying out inside of me, like water evaporating in the desert.

"I am honored and humbled by your offer." I bowed my head in deference, steadying myself from the trembling. "But I have a home and a family, now. This environment is not conducive to this environment, and I fear it would simply be burdensome to have me here. So my answer is thank you, truly, but no."

Was this it? I didn't see Aro holding me here when I publicly declined his offer of joining. It wouldn't be judicious. But to execute me for falsified crimes was far more reasonable. I could only hope that nothing lay beyond. Carlisle and I had long debated afterlife, and I wished I could reveal to him the answer once I knew for myself. And it seemed I would in only moments.

Jasper shifted his weight, drawing Aro's attention with the unnecessary movement.

"I do apologize, Major Hale!" Aro exclaimed, speaking to Jasper now. "I know Isabella doesn't wish to join us, but would you?"

Jasper shook his head and smiled, though it looked more like he was in pain. But, for some reason, it didn't make me uncomfortable or worried. Instead, I felt calmer than I had in a long time, and I wondered if this would all manage to work out. Logically, I knew it wouldn't. They were getting ready to feed, which would render a verdict one way or another. My throat was burning with such a desperate intensity that I found my thoughts in a jumble.

But even still, Jasper being here made me... calm. "I'm afraid I couldn't," he said politely.

Aro nodded knowingly. "You have someone to get back to," he said. I wondered if Jasper had met his mate in the time since we parted, and I felt a great deal of comfort from that idea that I could hold on to. He had seemed so wayward when we met, and Jasper leaving to find his happiness seemed like the best possible outcome I could imagine.

"I do," he said. Aro swept his hand out to bid him farewell, but Jasper paused awkwardly halfway up to meeting him.

"What is it?" Aro asked, his brow furrowing slightly as he held his hand out more insistently. Jasper frowned and touched his palm, and Aro sucked in a breath and looked at me sharply. "Of course," Aro said.

"I would appreciate it, if you wouldn't mind?" Jasper said, with graceful deference.

Aro turned to Marcus and brushed his hand along his brother's. Whatever knowledge he gained there, I didn't know, but it seemed to change his mind about something.

"Jasper was hoping Isabella would accompany him in his journey back to the New World. It seems as though he's been attempting a... vegetarian diet on his own, but could use the guidance."

"You know where Carlisle lives, don't you?" Caius asked shrewdly.

"Now, now," Aro said casually. "Jasper and Isabella are friends, too. And if we keep dear Isabella here with us any longer, Carlisle might end up looking for her as well!" Aro sighed. "Though perhaps that's a reason to delay your departure. It's been too long since we've seen him, as well."

That, I knew, was not a threat, but a genuine expression. Aro wasn't trying to lead Carlisle back to them, just generally musing on how my imprisonment might lead to a visit from their old friend, which would genuinely make Aro happy. It was one of Carlisle's greatest gifts- it was impossible to dislike him or wish him harm.

It seemed that that ability had never rubbed off on me.

"Well, we wouldn't want to keep you, and if you won't join us for a meal..."

"I'm trying to be good," Jasper said with a grin. "But I do enjoy a hunt, anyways." Aro laughed and clapped his hands delightedly.

I could hear them getting closer. I threw Jasper one last desperate look, and he seemed to sense my panic.

Jasper's warm hand rested on my elbow just as Felix had before, and he guided me out of the room.

"Good-bye, Isabella!" Aro called out. I turned quickly, shakily.

"Thank you for your hospitality, all of you," I said with a bowed head. "I am grateful to have caught up with my old friends, and met some of your new members. It seems we have all moved on, and I wish you all happiness and success for the long future ahead."

"The same from us," Aro said, more friendly than cordial. "I hope we can catch up again, one day. Maybe not as long as last time, though?"

"It would be an honour."

Jasper's grip on me tightened. The footsteps were coming nearer, and with farewells given and our leave granted, we were apparently free to leave. It didn't matter how quickly we rushed though. They were there.

I tucked my head down as they passed. I hadn't let myself drawn in a breath since my final goodbye, but it didn't seem to matter. My every muscle tensed, and Jasper's fingers were digging into my arm.

Heidi rounded the corner first, sashaying down the very center of the hall like it was her very own catwalk. She wasn't dressed for the weather. Her boots were heeled and extended up to her knees, leaving her thighs bare and stark-white. Her hips swayed with her every step, and her red lips were curled up into a smile.

"Will you not be joining us, Isabella?" she asked with a laugh, turning back to guide her tour following behind her.

I looked back, as well. I had been trying to keep my eyes down, to focus on Jasper, on Heidi, on Felix who was leading the way. Anything but them.

They were delicious. And so unsuspecting.

It had been centuries since I had seen this march for myself, but nothing had changed. I remembered every face. The small child skipping alongside her father, her hands in mittens and a woven cap snugly warming her head. Her dark hair curled out of the hat, and her nose was still pinkened from the cold. She was smiling and gazing around the dark stone hallway, never focusing on any one thing as she tried to keep up with the rest of the mock tour group.

But for once, I so longed to join them. There was almost nothing more I wanted than to tear my arm from Jasper's, to scoop that little girl away from her father and let the succulent nectar of her blood flow into my mouth and soothe the fire in my throat and the emptiness in my stomach.

It wouldn't

It didn't register for me, how we navigated out of the cavernous tunnels and up towards the city, nor that we silently wove through the cobblestone streets of the human city. All I could think of was the scents. Blood blood blood. It was all around us.

We broke into a sprint the second we cleared the city walls.