Chapter Fourteen
Aola stared sadly at her brother as she looked up from the datapad she was supposed to be studying; it had been two weeks since Killian's duel, and still, he had hardly said a word to her or any of the members of third squad. Outside of training, Killian seemed to be avoiding everyone and barely spoke unless spoken to; the other squads seemed to make things worse as they now either looked at Killian with respect for his victory over Malcolm or with fear for how brutal Killian had beaten the boy.
Aola had tried to get her brother to open up, to talk to her about what was troubling him, but Killian seemed like a completely different person now, and Aola didn't know what to do. The perpetual smile that had once been glued to her brother's face was replaced with a look of despair that broke Aola's heart.
The only good thing about the duel was that Malcolm and his gang seemed to be avoiding Killian and third squad at all costs; Malcolm seemed to actually be afraid of Killian, not surprising considering how close Killian had come to killing him. On more than one occasion, Aola would see fear in her former bully's eyes as her squad came close to interacting with Malcolm's.
Even her parents had seen the sudden shift in Killian's demeanor, and Aola knew it troubled them deeply, but like her, they had no idea what to do to help him out of it. All Aola could do was try and show her brother that she was there for him if and when he decided to talk about what was bothering him; so, with a sigh of sadness, Aola returned to her datapad.
XXXX
Killian sighed wearily as he entered his room, the days' training over; all he wanted was a shower and to go to sleep, but those thoughts were dashed when he saw that his room was already occupied by the one person he wanted to avoid the most.
"We must talk, boy," Darth Malgus said simply as he stared coldly at Killian; the Sith's face was impassive as he lazily leaned against the far wall, arms crossed, and yet Killian could feel the barely controlled anger coming from the Sith.
"We have nothing to discuss," Killian retorted, "Get out."
Malgus' smirked at the boy for a moment before replying, relishing in the feeling of anger that seemed to come off of Killian in waves.
"We have a great deal to discuss, apprentice," Malgus replied softly,
"I AM NOT YOUR DAMN APPRENTICE!" Killian snarled back, making Malgus smile as the anger turned into white-hot rage.
"Good," Malgus said with a savage smile, "Let the anger fuel you. It makes you stronger, makes you powerful!"
Killian paled at the words, and Malgus scowled as he felt the anger retract behind mental iron walls, replaced with feelings of shame and disgust.
"You lied to me…." Killian muttered as his gaze fell to the floor,
"And how pray tell, did I do that?" Malgus sneered,
"You told me that you would teach me to control my abilities,"
"And I have done so, have I not?" Malgus asked with a raised eyebrow,
"No…" Killian replied with despair etched in the word, "You made me into a monster; I almost killed someone because I let the anger take hold of me."
"Yes, I heard about your duel against your schoolyard bully," Malgus sneered, "He is a weakling that sought greater respect by challenging what he thought to be a weaker opponent. But unfortunately, he learned that he was wrong. You SHOULD have killed him."
Killian's head snapped up at the words, and Malgus was disgusted to see the boy's features contract with horror.
"What…." Killian said in a whisper,
"I SAID you should have killed him," Malgus repeated, his lip curling, "The weak do not deserve mercy; all they deserve is to die! THAT is the law of the galaxy; the weak deserve to serve, and the strong deserve to rule!"
"You're insane…." Killian said, his eyes wide in horror, "I'm only eleven! I shouldn't be anywhere near a battlefield, let alone trying to kill someone!"
"I killed my first being when I was far younger than you, boy," Malgus retorted with a sneer as he uncrossed his arms and took a step toward the boy.
"You're a monster!" Killian said, taking a step back,
"No, I am the law of the galaxy personified!" Malgus snarled, making Killian flinch, "The Sith will destroy the pathetic Republic because WE are stronger than THEM! We shall tear down every trace of their pathetic civilization until only the Sith empire remains because THAT is the way of the galaxy, the strong rule, and the weak either die or serve! That is what I have been trying to teach you, yet you remain the same scared child I found a year ago!"
"I AM A CHILD!" Killian retorted, "I JUST WANTED TO LEARN HOW TO CONTROL MY ABILITIES RATHER THAN BE CONTROLLED BY THEM! BUT YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MY DESPERATION FOR A TEACHER! YOU TRIED TO TURN ME INTO A MONSTER! LIKE YOU!"
Malgus sneered at the boy's outburst before raising his fist slowly, making Killian's eyes bug out and his hands reach for his throat as his airway closed. Malgus kept his fist raised for a moment, watching the terrified boy fight for oxygen before finally releasing his hold, staring silently as Killian collapsed to the floor and gasped for air.
"You are not ready," Malgus said simply, "I had hoped that you would have abandoned your pathetic notions of good and evil, considering how you were raised, but it is clear that is not the case."
"Go to hell!" Killian snarled as he looked up at Malgus, tears running down the boy's face from almost being strangled.
Darth Malgus chuckled at the boy's impudent anger and went down on one knee so that he was looking at the boy more easily,
"One day, you will seek me out of your own free will," Malgus said with a cold smile, "And on that day, we shall continue your training."
"I will NEVER serve under you!" Killian growled, "I will die before I become a Sith!"
"We shall see," Malgus replied with a wry grin before he rose to his feet and made his way to the door; before he left, Malgus turned one final time to the kneeling figure behind him, who was still trying to catch his breath.
"I look forward to the day we meet again, apprentice when you come begging me to teach you again. When I am finished with you, you will truly be the most powerful Sith in the empire."
Without another word, Malgus opened the door and walked out; for a moment, Killian just kneeled there, the Sith's words echoing in his head. Then, a moment later, it seemed like a dam had burst, and Killian began to sob out his anger and fear, his disgust with himself, and his shame that he had ever asked a Sith for help.
The door behind him hissed open, and Killian turned fearfully, expecting to see Malgus return and hurt him some more; however, instead of Darth Malgus glaring down at him, Killian's eyes focused on Terra, who was looking at him with worry.
"Killian? I just saw Darth Malgus leaving your room! I thought I told you you weren't to see him anymore…." Terra began before she was tackled around the waist by her crying son, who started to sob into her stomach.
"Mom…." Killian sobbed, "Please forgive me…."
As gently as she could, Terra wrapped her arms around her son, holding him silently for a moment before she replied in a soft voice,
"Oh, Killian….There is nothing to forgive."
"I should have listened to you!" Killian cried as he sobbed into her shirt, "The Sith are all monsters! And yet I still chose to learn from one! I almost killed Malcolm!"
Terra bit her lip as she tried to think of something to say, her lekku drooping with despair at what her son was going through.
"But you didn't," Terra finally offered, gently stroking Killian's long hair, "That is what makes all the difference. a Sith would have killed that boy and thought nothing of it afterward, but you feel shame for what you did, and that shows me that you are not one of them, and that is something that I am so grateful for."
"But I wanted to!" Killian cried out, fear evident in his voice, "It felt so good making him pay for every slight and insult he threw at my squad and me! I wanted to kill him! What does that say about me?!"
"Now you see the danger of the power of the Sith," Terra said sadly, "I am both happy and sad that you had to experience such a thing. Happy because you saw what happens to those who let such power consume them, yet you pulled back before you went too far and at the same time sad that you had to experience it. I hope you will gain wisdom from this and learn not to let the power control you again."
"B-but he said that one day I w-would seek him out of my own free will and beg him to teach me! What if he's right?!" Killian sobbed, making Terra hold him tighter,
"Prove him wrong, then." Terra said simply, making Killian look up at her, "The future is not set in stone, no matter what others believe. I have no doubt that you will be an amazing warrior one day, but what else you become is up to you; so, prove the bastard wrong, understand?"
Killian sniffled and angrily wiped his eyes before looking up at her with a determined gleam that made her heart race,
"I understand, mom," Killian replied, "I WILL prove him wrong about me, I swear it!"
Terra smiled proudly at her son; she had been worried since his duel that perhaps his spirit had been broken and, like Aola, didn't know what to say to him, but seeing him now showed she had been wrong. Killian's spirit was far from broken, and she was proud to see how he now looked, no longer afraid but determined.
"You know Aola and the rest of your friends have been worried about you," Terra said warmly, "Why don't you go and speak with them? Tell them how sorry you are for avoiding them these last few weeks."
Killian quickly jumped to his feet and nodded before giving his mother one final hug and dashing out the door while Terra watched with a happy smile; she didn't know what had occurred between Darth Malgus and Killian. All she knew was that whatever it was, it had scared Killian enough to ensure he never would seek the Sith out again for teaching, and for that, she would be eternally grateful.
XXXX
Aola was enjoying her dinner with the rest of the third squad when she heard a small cough behind her; turning to see who it was, her eyes widened when she saw Killian standing awkwardly behind her, shuffling his feet nervously.
"Um….can I join you all?" Killian asked nervously, making Ben and Dani look at each other in surprise; even Alexander was looking at Killian shrewdly as though trying to figure out what his cousin was up to.
"Of course, you can!" Aola cried cheerfully, scooting over to make room; Killian smiled happily before he took his seat and began to nervously fidget under the stares of his squad mates,
"Um…..I wanted to say I'm sorry for how I have been behaving these last few weeks," Killian said softly, looking down at the table, "I couldn't bear to look at you all. I was ashamed of myself for how I acted during my duel with Malcolm. I'll understand if you refuse, but I ask for your forgiveness."
Nothing was said for a few moments, and Killian was afraid they would not forgive him. He wouldn't have blamed them if that had been the case; just when Killian was about to give up hope, Aola roughly pulled him into a hug, making Killian's eyes widen in surprise.
"You're such an idiot, you know that?" Aola said in a broken voice, "We were never mad at you, little brother. Instead, we were sad because we could see how much you were suffering, yet we couldn't think of how to help."
"You can't have our forgiveness, cousin," Alexander said sternly, "Because there is nothing to forgive."
"Yeah," Ben added with a smile, "You're our friend, and friends stick together."
Dani said nothing, simply smiled at Killian, who was desperately fighting not to show the tears that threatened to come out; he was sure that they had been mad at him and would never forgive him; to be shown otherwise was something that made him deliriously happy.
Finally, Aola released her hold on Killian and pulled away, showing her wet cheeks where tears had run down her face; angrily, she wiped them away before turning back to her food,
"Are you hungry? We just sat down, so there should be some left if you are…." Aola mumbled, making Killian grin,
"Yeah, I think I'll get myself a tray, be right back."
Without another word, Killian jumped up and ran to get some food as his friends smiled warmly at his back, their friend had returned to them, and they couldn't have been happier about it.
XXXX
THREE YEARS LATER:
Killian stood at attention next to the rest of his squad, the courtyard silent as a tomb as Buta Kug stared at the assembled trainees with something resembling satisfaction. Four years had passed since Killian had been brought to Mandalore, and the changes were evident to anyone who knew him before; no longer was Killian, the scrawny kid that had been pushed around all his life. Instead, Killian was now tall and proud, standing over five and a half feet with a heavily muscled physique from interminable hours of training and physical exercise. His long black hair hung braided down his back, past his shoulders, reminiscent of the Viking television shows he watched on earth.
Beside him stood Aola, and where Killian was muscled, she was lithe and slim, the envy of many a female and desire of many a male, much to her annoyance. Aola hated the attention her body gave her, as many thought she would be more suited to a dancing pole than a battlefield.
Alexander was on her left and was also heavily built, like Killian, though his hair was cut military-style, as was his preference.
Dani was next in line and, like Aola, had a slim and lithe figure that allowed speed in place of strength; that was not to say that Dani was weak, far from it, in fact, as many a male had discovered when they approached her hoping to take her to dinner and instead receiving a boot to their manhood. It wasn't that Dani didn't like men; she just didn't like arrogant men who saw her and Aola as playthings. The left side of Dani's head was shaved, and her hair hung loose on her right side in defiance of anything that might tame it.
The last in the line was Ben, and it was he who was the most intimidating of all of the third squad; standing over six feet tall with many years of growing yet to do, all of Mandalore knew that Ben would be a giant one day. The fact that he was even more heavily built with muscles than Alexander or Killian made Ben more than a little intimidating to the others who sought to challenge third squad as the top squad of the year. Ben's head was shaved on the sides and back, leaving only a patch of hair on top, that he combed back to fall down his head; the end result was a truly fearsome teenager who, although seemed like a brute, was, in fact, the complete opposite, though no one outside third squad needed to know that.
The war for the last three years was almost entirely one-sided; nearly every battle had resulted in the Republic being pushed back, to the joy of Mandalore, who saw the Republic's continued losses as justice for crimes past and each fallen Jedi was revenge for a fallen Mandalorian. Killian had joked that the war would be over before any of the trainees got a chance to fight and received a furious rant from Terra that war was nothing to joke about as a result. It had taught him when to keep silent about such things.
"Tomorrow is the day many of you have been waiting for!" Buta shouted out suddenly, his stern voice echoing in the silent courtyard, "Tomorrow is the day you all take your right of challenge! To decide if you are worthy of wearing the armor of a Mandalorian!"
Buta began to pace up and down the line as he spoke, yet no one met his eye; they knew what would happen if they did, so everyone fixed their eyes on the wall behind their drillmaster.
"I have no doubt that this will be the last day of your miserable life for many of you! But, for others, tomorrow will be a day of glory as you claim that which is rightfully yours! Which is which, however, will depend entirely on you!"
Buta stopped in front of Aola at the end of his speech and stared down at her as though daring her to meet his eyes; after a tense moment, Buta nodded his head in satisfaction before moving back to the front of the group.
"You will report to the courtyard tomorrow at dawn, where you will be taken to a nearby planet; there, you will be left with only the clothes on your back and one small knife for defense. Your challenge is to survive for one month on this planet surrounded by things that want nothing more than to rip the flesh from your bones and feast upon it! If you have survived at the end of that month, you will earn your armor! Those who don't survive will be remembered only as wastes of my time who were too weak to be Mandalorian! Is that clear?!"
"YES, SIR!" Echoed the reply as the squads shouted out as one, making Buta nod his head in satisfaction.
"Good, then you are released for the day. What you choose to do with the rest of your time is entirely up to you! DISMISSED!"
As Buta stormed off, Killian suddenly felt excitement course through him; for three years now, he had pushed his body and mind to the limit of what they could do, all in preparation for this day, the day when he would earn the right to call himself a Mandalorian. Unknown to anyone, however, Killian had also been continuing his training of the way of the force; no longer did he try and learn the ways of the dark side, but instead, he tried to find a balance between the light and dark and use both sides. As a result, his powers had doubled in the three years since he had last seen Darth Malgus, and no longer did Killian have to fear his powers; now, they served him.
"Come," Alexander said as he turned to leave the courtyard, "We don't want to be late for dinner; it would not do to keep father waiting."
"See you tomorrow," Killian said to Dani and Ben before turning to follow his cousin, Aola following close behind.
Dinner that night was a tense affair; the hall was filled with Mandalorians who were constantly approaching Killian, Aola, and Alexander to wish them good luck. Throughout the night, it looked as though Lec wanted to say something to Alexander and yet couldn't seem to bring himself to say it. When dinner was finally over, Lec held his cup in a toast to his family.
"Tonight, we toast my son, nephew, and niece, who tomorrow will be undertaking their right of challenge to see whether they are worthy of wearing the armor of our people!"
The guests cheered at their leader's words, and Killian felt his excitement rise at the words of what would occur tomorrow.
"I have no doubts that they will make our clan and our people proud! So, to you, my family, I say good luck!" Lec concluded, bringing a roar from the guests as Argyle slapped Killian on the back with a smile on the old Twi'lek's face, which made Killian smile even wider.
After dinner, Argyle and Terra pulled Killian and Aola aside to whisper words of encouragement while Lec took his son to no doubt do the same.
"I want you to promise me something," Terra said seriously as she faced her two children, "I want you to look after one another, and if you're in trouble, don't try to be brave. Just run, understand?"
"I'm no coward, mom," Killian said quickly, receiving a slap across the back of the head from Terra as a result,
"It's not about being brave, Killian," Terra snapped, "It's about being smart! The planet you're going to will be extremely dangerous; there will constantly be things around you that want to kill you! You will not survive if you're a fool, do you understand?!"
"I understand, mom," Killian replied softly before wrapping his arms around her in a warm hug, "I'll make you proud, I promise."
"You already have, Killian," Argyle said softly as Killian pulled away from Terra and turned to face him, "Now, just make sure you come back alive."
Killian nodded his head solemnly as Aola took her turn and hugged her parents,
"Don't worry, I'll keep an eye on Killian," Aola chirped, "He'd be lost without me, after all."
The group laughed at that, minus Killian, who was scowling at Aola in annoyance, which just seemed to make her laugh harder.
"All right, to bed, you two!" Terra said with a smile, "Tomorrow will be a very long day; I speak from experience."
With a final hug, Killian and Aola made their way to their rooms, though each knew it would be next to impossible to fall asleep as both were filled with excitement and fear in equal measure at the prospect of finally earning their armor.
"I will not fail," Killian repeatedly thought like a mantra as sleep finally came for him, "I will not fail!"
XXXX
The next day, Killian and the rest of the third squad were sitting quietly on a shuttle, desperately trying not to show how nervous they were; they were allowed to bring only what they were wearing. This was a test of survival, after all, and as such, they wore only their training uniforms. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, the ship landed hard, almost knocking Killian from his seat as a Mandalorian wearing red armor approached the four teenagers.
"This is your stop," the Mandalorian said in a cold voice as the ramp behind them slowly lowered. Once they had all disembarked from the ship, the Mandalorian threw four knives onto the ground; Killian quickly took in his surroundings and noticed that they had been dropped into a large clearing with a forest surrounding them in every direction.
"Good luck," the warrior said simply, bringing Killian's attention back to the warrior, "I'll be back in a month for the survivors."
Without another word, the warrior turned and reentered the ship, and the teenagers watched nervously as the ramp rose back up; a moment later, the ship rose into the sky and disappeared into the atmosphere.
"Come on," Alexander said as he picked up his knife and stowed it in his pants, "We need to find shelter before nightfall."
Quickly nodding, the others picked up their knives before following Alexander into the forest; the sun was still high in the sky, but each shivered nervously.
Author's Note:
I apologize for taking so long to update this story; I had major writer's block and had no idea what to write. I hope this chapter makes up for it, and I hope the next chapter won't take so long to write. As always, reviews are appreciated as they help me improve the story, and I hope you enjoy the new chapter. I tried to give Killian a Viking look to try and make him seem fiercer and show how much effort he's put into becoming a Mandalorian since turning his back on the dark side (at least for now, lol)