Casey is home. His legs work, and so does everything else. He comes back from a run early in the morning because he is insane like that, and even though he's all sweaty you're all over him because Casey is a MAN and you love MEN and Casey.
And then Maura is in the doorway of your bedroom, looking awkwardly in at the two of you. The light from the kitchen window makes her hair glow, and she looks like she belongs here in your bachelor hovel, not Casey.
She asks, politely, if she's interrupting, and you tell her, sarcastically, that you were hoping for an orgy. That you were one short.
And Maura steps into the bedroom, and your heart kind of... stops, because she's looking at you - you, not Casey - and she's stopped at the edge of the bed in front of you and touches your chin, tilting your face up to hers, and then her index finger is trailing over your bottom lip as though she's testing a theory, the concentrated look on her face she has when she's compiling evidence, and a moment later she smiles, satisfied, and meets your eyes and her eyes are glowing and crinkled with something akin to true joy and then her pink, plump lips are descending on yours and the kiss she gives you is somehow both soft and scorching, and you can see Casey move to touch her, and you can see how she moves away from him, making this about you, and you have no other recourse than to kiss her back. You don't even realise you're doing it until you feel that same finger that touched your lips trail down to your collarbone, then fist in the front of your 'property of BPD' shirt, pulling you closer. There are two pairs of hands tugging at your shirt, and then one very confident one cups you, and you haven't touched anyone, haven't explained that it was a joke but then you realise one of your hands has tugged Maura's shirt all the way off and the other is firmly on her butt and she hasn't moved away from you the way she did Casey, and Casey is here, you'd forgotten about him, he's somewhere in the room but you can't see or feel him but mostly you forget he's here at all because Maura is kissing you again and she tastes like sunshine and honey and she feels like molten lava under your hands and the way she looks at you, when you finally touch her...
There's a chuckle from the doorway, and you shake your head, and Maura is still in the doorway, fully dressed. And she's laughing like you made a joke and she's looking at you with those same stars in her eyes.
And you wish, for a moment, that you hadn't been joking.
"That was mean," Casey tells you later. "You know she takes things literally. You know she adores you - if she thought you wanted her to join us, you know she would if she thought it would make you happy. You could have told her you were just joking."
You just smile at him sadly, because there are no stars in his eyes when he looks at you, and he never takes you literally. But he is a MAN, and you love MEN, and Casey, so you smile anyway, like you'd been joking.