*Hi, I hope this finds everyone well. Thanks for reading and reviewing, it means a great deal to me. As far as my original "Chrome Painted Heart" is concerned, I am so grateful to all of you who have read it. If you are still interested and haven't had a chance, I will be putting it on sale mid May around the 18-22 so if you are so inclined, please check it out. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the next installment of Jane and Maura's happy family. Take care and thanks for reading. 😊
Bliss Like This
7
Jane paced back and forth in the bathroom trying not to look at the three sticks laid out on the counter in a neat row, waiting to reveal what she already suspected. She was alone, opting not to tell Maura just yet and she was beginning to have second thoughts as a wave of nausea washed over her. Closing her eyes as she stopped pacing, she grabbed the edge of the counter and waited for the feeling to pass and when it didn't, she let out a heavy sigh of regret, knowing that she needed Maura to be there with her. Without opening her eyes, she turned away from the three sticks, each mocking her in its own way and slipped from the bathroom without looking at them. She pulled her phone from her pocket and texted Maura with shaky fingers. Another wave of nausea threatened to knock her over when the realization hit her that she would have to admit what she had done, but it was too late for regrets as she hit the send button and sent the message.
"I need you to come home." The words slid across the screen in the light blue bubble that indicated it had been sent. Blinking her eyes rapidly, she did her best to stay the tears that stung at the corners of her eyes as she watched three little dots appear indicating that Maura was typing out a reply.
"Is something wrong?" Came Maura's text, rather quickly.
"Just please come home…" Jane texted but then paused, adding "I need you." Before hitting send.
"I'll be home in twenty minutes..." Maura answered back without further question and it caused Jane to smile. Dropping down on their bed, she decided to rest her eyes, hoping the sick feeling would pass. As she snuggled against the pillow, her nausea finally subsided, and she fell asleep.
The dip of the bed roused Jane from her nap, followed by the feeling of someone running their fingers through her tangle of dark hair. She knew who it was without opening her eyes and she fought against the heaviness holding her eyelids shut, but eventually, she was able to slowly blink them open to find Maura looking down on her with concern and uncertainty. The black scrubs indicated that Maura had left in a hurry and hadn't bothered to change back into her regular clothes, and it made Jane's heart swell with happiness that Maura had dropped everything to be with her… even if she wasn't sure what was going on.
"You want to tell me what's going on?" Maura's voice held a soft lilt to it as if she didn't want to disturb the stillness that had settled around them.
"I did something I shouldn't have." Jane dropped her gaze from Maura's penetrating hazel-green eyes.
Pulling her fingers away from Jane's hair, Maura sat up straighter and put some distance between them. "O-k-ay…" she drew the word out on an unsteady breath. She had no idea what Jane could be referring to but for some reason, her heart stuttered at the possibilities.
Jane felt the distance the second that Maura pulled away and sat up, so they were now only inches apart. "I took a pregnancy test…or maybe three…" her voice faltered. "But I haven't looked at the results yet." She added quickly.
The shock on Maura's face said everything she didn't need to. Shaking her head sadly, she reached up to rub her forehead to try and smooth away the impending headache that pricked at the backs of her eyes. She wasn't sure what she should say or what Jane needed to hear but it was obvious by the frown on her face and the crease in her brow that she was hurt. "Why would you do that… without me?" The question was punctuated by a tilt of her head as she bit down on her bottom lip to keep herself from saying anything she might regret.
"Well, um… I didn't really…" Jane offered her weak argument, but when Maura raised an eyebrow in question, Jane relented. "Okay… I did, but I haven't looked at the results. I just couldn't do that without you."
"You still haven't told me why…" Maura let out an impatient sigh at Jane's attempt to explain herself.
"You've been working so hard these last few weeks, I just thought I'd do it and…" Jane hesitated. "I mean… I don't know." When Maura continued to look at her with uncertainty and skepticism, she let out a heavy breath and coughed nervously to clear her throat. "I was afraid, and I didn't want you to see me that way."
The word 'afraid' hit Maura like a ton of bricks. She knew how much Jane wanted everyone to think she had no fear. She had been a badass detective who at one time stared down the barrel of a gun without blinking an eye and it was a reputation she strived to keep every day. But here and now… at this moment, Jane seemed to be crippled with a fear that Maura had never seen before. Suddenly all she felt was sympathy and love as she continued to stare into the dark brown eyes that implored her to understand. And she did understand but it didn't make what Jane had done any less painful. Reaching out, she placed an open palm against Jane's cheek and tried to smile. "What are you afraid of?" She had to ask.
Taking a deep breath, Jane held it for a few seconds before letting it out slowly as all her fears threatened to burst from the wall she had built to keep them at bay. She shook her head as she tried to find the words, but they wouldn't come… only silence as the tears began to roll down her cheeks.
"Oh, honey…" Maura wrapped her arms around Jane's shaking body and pulled her close. "Please, talk to me." She sighed against the dark head her chin rested on as Jane pressed her tear-stained face to the hollow of Maura's throat.
"If it's positive, there's no going back…" Jane murmured against the warm skin she now rested against.
The vibration of Jane's words reverberated throughout Maura's body as she tried to think of what to say next. "But I thought this is what you wanted…" she couldn't help saying the one thing she wasn't sure she should say.
"I do want this." Jane hiccupped as she tried to slow down the tears. "I really do, but I'm terrified Maur… what if I don't do the right thing… what if I hurt the baby… what if I don't get enough sleep… eat the right things… there is so much that can go wrong. What I'm no good at it?"
The rush of words came out without a pause and it made Maura's head spin. She had no idea that Jane was feeling any of these things and guilt rushed over her, making her skin prick with heat and shame. "I had no idea…" she continued to hold Jane close.
"If it's positive, there's no going back. Are you sure you trust me to do this right? What if I suck at it?" Jane asked as she wiped at her face with the palm of her hand.
"First of all… you have never sucked at anything in your life so there's that…" Maura said as she began to rub Jane's back to soothe her. "And secondly, I wouldn't want to do this with anyone but you. I can't promise that everything will be fine, but I will be beside you every step of the way… no matter what."
Jane pulled back so she could look Maura in the eyes and offered a tentative smile to let her know everything was okay. "I guess I just freaked out a little… sorry."
"Don't you ever apologize for being honest with me. When I married you, I promised to stand by you through thick and thin. No matter what happens, I will always be here for you." Maura paused to run her finger down Jane's cheek until it came to rest in the chin dimple she loved so much. "You don't always have to be the brave one, ya know. Let me try it on for size sometimes." She smiled before she leaned in to press her lips to Jane's. The kiss was soft and gentle as if Maura was offering comfort and solace instead of the usual heat and sensuality that sparked between them.
Jane accepted Maura's offer with a soft sigh before pulling back so she could lean her forehead against Maura's. "I love you so much." She said with a genuine smile, the fear and uncertainty finally pushed aside for the moment.
"I love you, too. Now, how about we…" Maura hitched her thumb towards the bathroom door to indicate what she was talking about.
"I guess now's as good a time as any."
"You want to go first?" Maura asked.
"No, I meant it when I said I needed you here. We need to do this together." Jane nodded her resolve.
"Okay then…" Maura said as she pushed herself up from the bed, grabbing Jane's hand to help pull her up as well. "Let's do this."
As they made their way to the bathroom, Maura held tightly to Jane's hand afraid that her legs might be too shaky beneath her. It wasn't fear that made her feel weak, but anticipation and Jane's realization that there was no going back. She could feel Jane next to her and did her best to offer her strength, or what she had left as she opened the bathroom door. She looked in and saw the three white sticks laid out on the counter then turned to Jane with a crooked grin. "You took three tests?"
Jane nodded emphatically in response. "One has a smiley face, one has a plus, and one has two lines… I just wanted to make sure."
"You know I could have just given you a blood test." Maura offered.
"What? You know I hate needles." Jane looked horrified.
"I do…" Maura said, not ready to remind Jane that she would probably encounter a few needles over nine months of pregnancy. "Are you ready?"
Holding on to Maura's hand tighter, Jane nodded again but her voice was shaky as she said: "No", followed by a quick "Yeah".
Slowly, they crept into the bathroom, hand in hand before stopping in front of the three sticks. Taking a deep breath to brace herself, Maura looked down and then smiled. She glanced over at Jane to see if she had seen the same thing, but Jane had a hand in front of her eyes, her fingers splayed slightly apart so Maura could see one dark, brown eye peering at her with uncertainty. Her smile widened causing Jane to drop her hand from her eyes and then they widened in wonder replacing the uncertainty that had lingered since Maura had arrived.
"Really…?" Jane whispered.
"We're going to have a baby." Maura let go of Jane's hand and pulled her into a hug. She had worried that it might take them longer because Jane had never really had regular periods and trying to pinpoint the time of ovulation might be harder than anticipated. But here they were, after their second try… a smiley face, plus, and two lines provided the proof. Pulling back, she looked down at Jane's abdomen and placed the palm of her hand there. "Our little bean is in there…" she marveled.
When Jane placed her hand over Maura's, they looked at each other and smiled. The fear and uncertainty that had ruled Jane's mind was suddenly gone, replaced with happiness, anticipation, and so much love she thought she might burst. "We're gonna have a baby." She echoed Maura's earlier words. "What do we do next?"
"Well…" Maura looked back down at where their hands rested, a huge smile stuck on her face. "We'll have to make an appointment with Linda for some blood tests…" she started to say but then ducked her head slightly when she saw Jane's bottom lip poke out in a pout. "Sorry, honey but it has to be done." She reached up to touch Jane on the cheek to offer comfort. "And…" she hesitated briefly before deciding she needed to say what she was about to say. "I think we need to keep this between us, at least for a little while."
Taking a deep breath, Jane pushed her dark hair away from her face and nodded her agreement. "I know, but it's gonna be hard to keep it from my Ma. You know how she is."
Maura was thoughtful for a moment but her resolve to keep it quiet for a while was strong. "I know but I really think it's for the best."
"I agree…" Jane sighed as she wrapped her arms around Maura and pulled her close so she could rest her chin on the top of Maura's head. "Do you have to go back to work?" She asked with a touch of sadness in her voice.
"Absolutely not." Maura snuggled her cheek against the hallow of Jane's throat. "It's not every day you get a smiley face, plus, and two lines…" she laughed lightly when Jane gave her side a gentle pinch. "How about we celebrate with some Nemo's Pizza and a family movie night?"
"Sounds good, add a cold beer to that and I'm sold…" Jane started to say but was stunned silent when Maura pulled back and gave her a stern look.
"No beer… not for the next nine months… or longer, if you breastfeed."
Rolling her eyes, Jane nodded her understanding. "Oh, yeah… I forgot." Her voice was heavy with defeat. "This sucks…" she sighed.
"And none of that greasy, nitrate filled meat on the pizza either. It's going to have veggies on it like mushrooms and spinach…" Maura explained.
"It's a pizza, Maur… not a salad." Jane couldn't help but huff impatiently.
"Oh, thanks for reminding me. I'll order a Greek salad to go with it. Valley loves the olives."
Scowling, Jane couldn't help but shake her head. "As long as the pizza doesn't have anything stupid on it like pineapple." She said, knowing full well that she was starting their age-old argument on whether fruit belonged on pizza.
"Oh no, you don't…" Maura glared up at Jane, a playful twinkle in her eyes. "I can't help it that pineapple and ham on pizza is just too advanced for your palate."
"Alright, I'll let you order the veggie pizza with mushrooms, fresh tomatoes, and black olives for Valley… and if you're really good, I might even let you get those little artichoke hearts on it that you love so much… but there will be no fruit. Can we agree on that?"
Maura was quiet as she bit down on her bottom lip and thought over Jane's offer. "Okay, but only if you agree to eat some salad too."
"Yes…" Jane relented with an exasperated sigh. She knew things would have to change, especially her diet, it was just something she would have to get used to.
"I'll stop by the pharmacy and pick up your prenatal vitamins when I head out to pick Valley up."
"I can pick Valley up." Jane seemed surprised by Maura's offer. She was usually the one to pick her up since she was usually done with her classes before Valley got out at three.
"I'm home for the rest of the day and I want you to rest." Maura started to give Jane a gentle push towards their bedroom.
"Look…" Jane held her hands up and anchored herself to the floor, refusing to give in to Maura's gentle push. "I'm not an invalid. I can pick our daughter up from school like I do most days." She frowned at Maura who seemed surprised by her outburst.
For a moment, silence was the only thing that filled the room but then Maura nervously cleared her throat. "Sorry… just being protective." She held her hands up in surrender. "But I can't help it. I just want to take care of you and the little bean…"
"I get that, babe… but if you smother me…" Jane rolled her eyes dramatically to emphasize her next words. "It won't go well for either of us."
"Okay, I'll do my best not to be overprotective, but I can't promise that I won't be..." Maura paused as she tried to think of a word to finish her thought. "Cautious…" she offered, and it caused Jane to laugh.
"Okay, but remember… I'm not breakable or weak." Jane said the last word with conviction. She hated for anyone to think she was weak, especially Maura. But she also knew that everything Maura did came from a place of love, not a need to control.
"Alright then, how about if you take a little nap while I take a shower and then we can go pick Valley up together."
"I've got a better idea…" Jane said as she grabbed Maura by the waist and pulled until their bodies were close. "How about we take a shower together." She said as she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
"And so, it begins…" Maura laughed as she lifted her arms to allow Jane to pull her black scrubs up and over her head. She watched as Jane wiggled out of her shorts and t-shirt, a sudden feeling of awe washing over her knowing that Jane's body was going to be changing as their baby grew. It was something that excited her, in more ways than one and her heart stuttered at how much love she was feeling as she allowed Jane to pull her into the shower. Maura couldn't help but think that things were about to get very different but in a very wonderful way.
"I can't believe we have to have everyone over for a brunch today." Jane groaned snuggling closer to Maura as they lazed around in bed on a Sunday morning. She shifted her hips, so Valley wasn't kneeing her in the back as the toddler yawned and stretched alongside her. "I thought we were going to stop letting her sleep with us." She whispered to Maura, hoping her words didn't carry to the other side of the bed.
"She didn't sleep with us." Maura tried to defend her decision to let Valley climb in bed with them early that morning. "She waited until the sun came up."
"Only just…" Jane yawned and stretched just as Valley had.
"Mama… you a bed hog." Valley wiggled in the small space between the edge of the bed and Jane's body.
"I'm a bed hog?" Jane rolled over and grabbed the little body in her arms, rolling them over until Valley was between her and Maura. "If anyone's a bed hog, it's your Mommy. Look at how much room she has…" she pointed out the large space Maura had between her and the edge of the bed.
Valley giggled and nodded her agreement. "Mommy is the bed hog, not us." She laughed even harder when Jane began to tickle her, her arms and legs flailing about as she tried to gain control.
"Valley… stop…" Maura's sat up, her voice stern and filled with an urgency neither Jane nor Valley recognized. She tried to grab Valley and stop her from accidentally kicking Jane, but Valley mistook Maura's actions for playing and only thrashed harder. "Stop it!" This time there was no mistaking the desperate anger in Maura's voice.
"I sorry, Mommy…" Valley sucked in her bottom lip as tears welled up in her eyes and she went still, dropping her arms and legs like a puppet whose strings had been untied.
"Maur?" Jane wrapped her arms around Valley and pulled her close to quell the tears that threatened to come.
Letting out a heavy sigh, Maura dropped her head into her hands before running her fingers through her hair, pushing it back away from her face. "I'm sorry, but we have to be careful. If she had kicked you… it might hurt…" she hesitated as she reached out and touched Jane on the stomach. Gaining some semblance of composure and control over her emotions, she sat up straighter and nodded her acknowledgment of having over-reacted. "We just need to be careful." She offered.
"Are you mad at me, Mommy?" Valley asked, her eyes wide as she tried not to cry.
"Oh, no…" Maura opened her arms as an invitation to Valley. "Come here."
Valley gave Jane an uncertain look before getting a reassuring smile to let her know that everything was okay. "Otay…" she pushed away from Jane and lept into Maura's arms.
Valley's leap from Jane into Maura's arms wasn't very graceful which was why Maura gave Jane a look that said, "See what I mean." Jane rolled her eyes in response but also knew that Maura was right. They needed to be careful now. No more roughhousing like before, but then how would they explain it to Valley in a way that she would understand, not to mention keep it a secret.
"I sorry, Mommy…" Valley allowed Maura to hold her close. Wrapping a finger around a strand of Maura's hair, she wiggled closer. "Was I too loud?" She asked, unsure why her Mommy had gotten angry.
"No, honey… we just have to be careful around your Mama." Maura said with a tired sigh.
"Why? Is she sick?" Valley's wide eyes turned to Jane who just quickly shook her head.
"No, I'm not sick." Jane pushed herself up so she could sit crossed legged, facing Valley and Maura. She raised an eyebrow in question at Maura, silently asking how they were going to handle this.
Jane was six weeks pregnant and Maura wasn't ready to broadcast it to everyone in the family. She had hoped that with the birth of Carly and Ryan's second daughter, the spotlight would not be on them. And things had been quiet as of late, but with everyone coming over to celebrate Frankie and Steph's engagement… that spotlight was about to shine down on them as bright as ever. It would be difficult to hide the nausea that Jane had been dealing with each time she ate. Angela would surely notice when Jane didn't go straight for the food and fill a plate, in fact, everyone probably would. The feeling of Valley moving around on her lap pulled her from her thoughts and she realized they would have to let the cat out of the bag, so to speak, and hope that Valley could keep the secret for a little while longer.
"Mama is growing a baby…" Maura said as she reached out to touch Jane's abdomen. "Here…" she placed her hand over the spot just above Jane's boxer shorts.
Valley's eyes got wide and her mouth turned into an 'O' as the words sunk in. "Mama is gonna have a baby?" She asked, watching as Jane placed her hand over Maura's, interlacing their fingers. "Can I see it?"
"No, not yet…" Maura gave Jane a soft smile and laughed.
"Why?" Valley asked as she tentatively reached out to touch Jane and Maura's hands.
Clearing her throat nervously, Maura wasn't sure exactly how to answer the question in a way that Valley could understand. She looked to Jane for help but got a smug smirk as an answer. She had no idea what to say but then an idea came to her. "You know how when Mommy bakes cookies and we leave them in the oven until they are done… it's kind of the same with Mama." She offered as an explanation.
Valley was quiet as she thought about what Maura had said. "You mean if the baby comes out too soon it will be squishy and not crunchy?" She asked, confusion all over her face.
"What? No, I mean…" Maura shrugged. Clearly, in over her head, she turned to Jane seeking help again.
"I confused…" Valley shook her head.
"Okay, kiddo…" Jane reached out to take Valley into her lap. When Maura gave her a hesitant look, she smiled reassuringly at her. "Yes, I have a baby in here…" she pointed at her abdomen. "And it's very little, like about the size of a Mexican jumping bean." This got a giggle from Valley and a raised eyebrow from Maura. "But we won't be able to see the baby until it grows bigger. And when that happens, you'll be a big sister." This statement got Valley's attention and she forgot everything before hearing she was going to become a big sister. It was a very effective tactic and Maura gave Jane an understanding smile filled with appraisal.
"I gonna be a big sister?" Valley asked, opening her arms wide to emphasize the word 'big'.
"Yep… and you're going to be the best big sister ever!" Maura cheered. "But we have to keep it a secret for a little while. Can you do that?"
Valley was quiet as she bit down on her lip and thought about what Maura had asked. "I can't tell Nona or Gigi?" She asked with a frown on her face.
"Not yet, but soon." Jane offered.
"Why?" Tears were beginning to pool in Valley's dark brown eyes again.
"We don't want to take Uncle Frankie's special day away from him, do we?" Jane asked as she began to run her fingers through Valley's honey-blonde hair, tucking a few strands behind her ear.
"No, I guess not." Valley nodded sagely as if she understood. "Can I tell Nona and Gigi tomorrow then?"
"Maybe…" Maura tried to find a compromise even though she wasn't ready to share the news, but maybe if it was regulated only their mothers. "Now…" she jumped out of bed and reached for Valley. "Let's go find something for you to wear to the party today." When Valley eyed her skeptically, Maura relented. "Okay, I'll let you pick anything you want." This statement got Valley moving quickly, but instead of letting Maura carry her, she took off towards her bedroom at a full run. "I think I might regret this…" she gave Jane an eye-roll.
"I think it was a good compromise…" Jane laughed. "But, yeah… you're totally gonna regret it."
"I didn't get a chance to tell you this morning, but you were great with Valley. I can't believe you were able to distract her from the questions and answers I was completely screwing up." Maura leaned close to Jane and whispered in her ear.
The feeling of Maura's warm breath against her skin caused her shiver and she turned to give Maura a dazzling smile showing off her dimples. "I know… I could see you struggling. Plus, I'm the oldest sibling, so I kinda know how to distract someone… with brothers like those…" she tilted her head towards Frankie and then Tommy who were both enjoying their beers and food. "But I think maybe we need to get a book or something to explain everything. I don't think I can wiggle out of her persistent questioning all the time. Sometimes she's worse than a detective."
"She gets her inquisitive side from you." Maura pressed a finger against Jane's chest.
"Hey, don't point that finger unless you're ready to use it…" Jane smirked and wiggled her eyebrows.
"Feeling better?" Maura's voice was laced with concern. Jane's nausea had been bad, bad enough for her to prescribe something so she could get through her meals lately.
"I am, but when is this going to pass. I'm looking forward to the cravings and eating whatever I want."
"Well, you can't eat whatever you want… but usually by the second trimester… I hope." Maura bit her lip again as she thought about what Jane had asked. She wasn't sure how long it would take for Jane to feel better, but she hoped soon. She hadn't eaten much lately, and it worried her that Jane might not be getting the nutrients and calories she needed.
"I can and will eat whatever I want." Jane pouted.
"Okay, we'll put a pin in that and revisit it later." Maura gave Jane a quick kiss to the cheek. "Your mother is watching us. I'm going to go check on the caterer."
Jane nodded as Maura left, her eyes falling on her mother who watched from across the room with a frown on her face. She tried to smile that same dazzling smile that showcased her dimples, the same ones that Frankie had but her mother wasn't buying it. The look of concentration that stared back at her caused her to squirm but then it was interrupted by Valley wrapping her arms around her legs and hugging her tightly.
"This okay, Mama… not too hard…" Valley asked as she looked up at Jane and continued to hang on to her legs.
"Just right." Jane smiled down at Valley. The sight of her daughter in overalls, a tutu, and a backwards baseball cap made her laugh and she knew that Maura had regretted letting her pick her outfit, although Jane didn't think it was that bad. Valley obviously wasn't going to become a fashion diva anytime soon. As her thoughts drifted to Valley's choice in clothing, she started to relax a little, but when Valley placed a kiss to her middle, she quickly looked up to find her mother watching them, a slow smile spreading across her face.
"I kiss the baby…" Valley whispered as she hugged Jane tighter.
Jane's heart melted at Valley's gesture. "You're gonna make an awesome big sister." She bent down and whispered in Valley's ear, causing the little girl to giggle. "But remember… it's a secret."
Valley stood up straighter and nodded her understanding. "I keep it secret, Mama… promise." She said just before Noah raced past her with her Buzz Lightyear toy, beckoning her to follow. But before she did, she looked up at Jane and blinked her eyes in an exaggerated way that could only be construed as her attempt at a wink. Jane winked back at her and it caused Valley to giggle again but this time in a conspiratorially way before taking off after Noah and Joe Friday who sat at the back door looking in, waiting for the toddlers to join her outside.
Jane waved at Valley as she and Noah disappeared out the screen door into the backyard where Joe Friday barked and raced around their feet in excitement. Cautiously, she glanced over at her mother who was watching her with the measured precision of someone who was clearly trying to figure something out and she braced herself for the whirlwind of questions her mother would surely bring down on her. But instead of making a beeline for Jane, Angela winked knowingly before going back to her conversation with Steph and her parents. To her surprise, Jane found herself standing alone in a room full of people and suddenly she was grateful because her nausea had returned like clockwork, exactly twenty minutes from the last time she ate. As the idea of disappearing to their bedroom seemed more and more promising with each passing minute, the feeling of someone sidling up alongside her caused her to curse quietly under her breath. Taking a deep breath to quell the sickness that threatened to overtake her, she turned to find Frankie with a huge grin on his flushed face. But then the smile dropped, and his dark eyes filled with concern as he looked her over, not sure if he liked what he was seeing.
"Hey, you okay? You look a little pale." He asked, his voice laced with concern.
"Yeah, just tired. It's been a busy weekend…" she tried to roll her eyes dramatically to let him know she was talking about the party they were throwing for him and Steph, not to mention getting the boat ready for their romantic evening the night before.
Giving her a skeptical look, he then nodded his head in acceptance of the excuse she offered. "Yeah, about that…" he ducked his head shyly. "Thanks… you and Maura went above and beyond. I can't thank you enough for what you've done. It's really scored me some points on the romance scale." His smile caused his eyes to twinkle, or maybe it was the alcohol, Jane wasn't sure.
"No problem little bro." Jane shifted her weight from one foot to the other, trying to find the easiest way to make her getaway. "I'm just glad we could help make it special. You and Steph are made for each other. Have you set a date yet?"
"We were thinking, maybe the fall…" Frankie said as his eyes met Steph's from across the room.
Jane could see the silent message of love pass between them and it warmed her heart to know that her brother had found someone to love as much as she loved Maura. And then that wave of nausea washed over her again but before she could do anything about it, Tommy appeared by her side with three beers in his hands.
"Hey, we need to toast the groom to be..." Tommy said as he handed Jane and Frankie each an IPA from their favorite microbrewery.
Jane reluctantly took the beer offered to her, catching Maura's eye. Maura looked as if she was going to run over to knock the beer from her hand, so she winked to let Maura know she had things under control. She wasn't really paying attention to what Tommy was saying as he toasted Frankie but when she saw them raise their beers, she did the same before clinking them together. Tilting the bottle back, she pretended to take a long, satisfying drink but the moment she caught a whiff of the heavy IPA, it took everything she had to push back the sickness that burned at the back of her throat. She didn't realize that the color of her skin had gone from pale to pale green, but Tommy did as he looked her up and down with a confused look on his face.
"Hey, you're looking a little green around the gills. What gives?" He eyed her cautiously as if she might vomit on his new tennis shoes.
"Nothing gives, I just ate too much." She placed a hand on her stomach and winced as it gurgled. "I think I'm gonna go check on the caterers."
Frankie and Tommy exchanged funny looks but nodded their acceptance as she turned on her heel and pushed past them towards the kitchen. There was a small half-bath in the hallway off the kitchen, but she worried it wouldn't offer enough privacy so she decided to chance it and go to the kitchen where she might find some peace and quiet. She was happy to find that it was empty and let out a sigh of relief as she headed to the sink so she could finally dump the foul-smelling IPA she had once loved.
Standing over the sink, she concentrated on the glug, glug, glug of the amber liquid as she poured it from the bottle, trying not to feel sick by both the smell and waste of throwing it away. Her nausea slowly subsided as she stood there, watching as her beer disappeared down the drain. Taking a deep breath, she pushed her hair away from her face and set the bottle down on the counter next to the sink before turning around to find her mother standing in the doorway with a Cheshire grin on her face.
"How far along are you?" Angela asked as she stood in the doorway, nervously twisting her hands and watching Jane with wide eyes.
"How did you know?" Jane leaned a hip against the counter and let out a tired sigh.
"Well, you're three shades greener than a four-leaf clover and you just poured out one of those mini brew beers you love so much."
"Microbrew, Ma…" Jane's voice trailed off. There was no use pretending at this point, so she blew out a frustrated huff. "Six weeks…" she finally admitted.
Angela was hesitant as she stepped closer to Jane as if she were afraid that Jane would bolt away like a scared rabbit if she approached too quickly. "Wow, six weeks." She took another step closer and nodded in wonder. "I understand, ya know."
"Understand what, Ma?" Jane was still frustrated, and she couldn't hide it in her voice.
"Your father and I waited until I was ten weeks to tell the family. I understand that you aren't ready to tell everyone…" Angela's voice trailed off as she took another step closer to Jane. Opening her arms, she silently offered her comfort and understanding and was almost surprised when Jane threw herself at her. Wrapping her arms around her daughter, she held Jane close and rocked her back and forth like she had when Jane was little.
"I'm so scared, Ma…" Jane cried against Angela's shoulder where she rested her cheek.
"Oh, honey… this is wonderful news. It's okay to be scared, though." Angela pulled back so she could look at Jane. "It's perfectly normal to be scared. I'd be worried if you weren't."
"What if I screw this up?" Jane allowed her mother to wipe away her tears as she tried to catch her breath.
"You won't screw this up. You're a wonderful mother to Valley… it won't be any different. Trust me, I've done it three times."
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Jane chuckled lightly as her tears subsided. "Maura and I don't want to tell everyone until the ten-week mark, ya know… so please don't tell anyone."
"I won't. But I can't believe you thought you could keep something like this from me. I know you too well." Angela gave Jane's side a gentle pinch, causing her to laugh again.
"How did you figure it out?"
"You've been out of sorts lately. You're not eating like you usually do, and sometimes you look flushed and then pale… and then there are the three shades of green you turned after your brothers gave you that beer." Angela pointed at the bottle on the counter.
"Um… I didn't drink any, but the smell made me feel sick." Jane dropped her arms from their hug and shoved her hands into the pockets of her pants.
"It would have been fine if you'd had a sip or two… I used to have a glass of red wine here and there when I was pregnant with you and Frankie." Angela waved away Jane's concern.
"So that's what's wrong with us." Jane teased.
"Look, I know things have changed but… hey… one sip wouldn't hurt you or the baby." Angela said before her eyes got really wide. "The baby…" she whispered as she reached out to touch Jane's middle. "I saw Valley kiss you here…" she touched just above Jane's belly button. "That's when I knew my suspicions were right."
"We told her this morning and boy, was she full of questions that even Maura couldn't answer. You're not mad we told her before you, are you?"
"Although I'm a little hurt…" Angela gave Jane's middle a gentle pat. "I'm not mad. And as far as Valley is concerned, I knew she would be as inquisitive as her Mommies are, so I got a book that explains everything."
"A book?" Jane seemed pleasantly surprised that her mother had taken the initiative.
"Constance told me about it, so we ordered it from the LGBT bookstore downtown. It should be here next week." A proud smile slide across Angela's face.
"Wow, Ma… that's great. Thanks." Jane smiled back at her mother. "I was beginning to worry about it. Maura and I were really struggling with this…"
"Struggling with what?" Maura's voice interrupted Jane and Angela's conversation.
"Um…" Jane stuttered slightly.
"I know the secret…" Angela came to Jane's rescue.
"I figured it wouldn't take you long." Maura smiled. "But what are we struggling with?" She turned her attention to Jane, afraid that Jane was struggling with the fact that she was now pregnant.
"We've been struggling with explaining things to Valley."
"Oh…" Maura nodded in relief. "Yes, we have. I'm not sure how to explain it to her without getting too technical."
"Your mother and I bought a book that might help." Angela offered a resolution.
"Really?" Maura seemed surprised.
"We did and it will be here next week."
"How thoughtful." Maura smiled and reached out to give Angela's hand a gentle squeeze to illustrate how sincere she was being. "So, you know about…" she waved a hand at Jane as a goofy grin spread across her face.
"I do, and I promise not to tell anyone until you're ready to..." Angela said. "But please, tell your mother so I have someone to talk to about it… or…" she hesitated. "I just might bust with excitement."
"How about we have dinner together next week when she gets back from Paris?" Maura had already planned to have them both over to share the news. Her attention was suddenly on Jane when she heard a heavy sigh and looked over to see that Jane was slightly pale again. "You're feeling nauseous again?" Jane's answer was a slow nod. "How about a cup of tea?"
"Peppermint always worked for me when I was feeling nauseous…" Angela said as she started to dig through the pantry in search of the peppermint tea she knew was there.
"I'm so sorry you don't feel good." Maura wrapped her arms around Jane and pulled her close. "I wish there was something I could do to make it all better."
"I didn't start to feel better until around the ten-week mark and then…" Angela turned and gave Jane and Maura a saucy wink. "I was insatiable… and the sex… wow…"
"Ma!" Jane chastised her mother. "Please, control yourself."
"You just wait…" Angela glanced over her shoulder at Maura and gave her knowing smile, causing Maura to laugh.
"I told you…" Maura whispered in Jane's ear, causing Jane to blush.
"I am not having this conversation while my mother is standing five feet away from us." Jane frowned as she rested her chin on Maura's head.
When Angela found the peppermint tea, she filled a mug with water and placed it in the microwave. After setting the timer, she turned to find Jane and Maura holding each other close and the feeling of anticipation washed over. She couldn't wait to welcome her grandchild into their little, close-nit family. Watching Jane and Maura, she realized how much love surrounded them, filling their home and touching everyone they knew. Her heart filled with joy as she quietly slipped from the kitchen, leaving Jane and Maura to share a private moment before the flood gates opened as the celebrations continued to carry on around them.