Hope this finds everyone well. I want to take a second and say that although I moved quickly through Maura's PTSD… it isn't something I take lightly as my brother suffers from it. I know all too well how it can affect a person and the people that love them so please understand that my intention wasn't to gloss over it… just to finally bring an end to a dark time for Jane and Maura. I want happy times from here on out because I believe we could all use some happiness. Anyway… thanks for the reviews and as always… thanks for reading. Take care everyone… :)
BLT
Chapter 20
Jane wiped the sweat from her forehead before it could trickle down into her eyes and blur her vision. Standing outside the yard facing the fence she was currently pressure washing, she stared long and hard at her progress. There was some measure of satisfaction in seeing something go from dirty and grungy to clean and neat as she took a small amount of pleasure in watching it happen before her eyes. She held the pressure washer wand in one hand and continued to wipe at the sweat with the other, doing her best to ensure she could still see the slow reveal of wood from beneath years of grime. Her arm and hand ached from holding the trigger down but now that ache was slowly subsiding as she took a break to admire her handy work.
It had been a long morning, getting Valley ready for preschool and taking care of Li… alone, for the tenth day in a row. That's how many days it had been since the incident with Kelly had taken place and ten days was how long Maura had stayed in bed, either sleeping or crying. Although Jane understood what PTSD was, having experienced it herself and how much it could disrupt someone's life, she hadn't expected it to hit Maura as hard. Maura's propensity for logic and facts should have given her the tools she needed to realize that what happened to them wasn't her fault and that Kelly's death wasn't her responsibility. But that wasn't the case and after ten days, she was still unable to process what had happened and Jane was starting to worry she wouldn't be able to without help, something Maura was flat out refusing.
As she continued to stare at the fence, her vision began to blur and she realized it wasn't the sweat dripping down her face but the tears of fear and frustration that were now filling her eyes, making it difficult for her to see. They had been through so much already, she refused to believe this would the thing to break them which was why she had stepped outside to let off some steam and think about what she could do to help Maura.
"Hey, honey… you thirsty?" Angela asked, startling Jane from her thoughts.
"Um…" Jane quickly tried to wipe away the tears she didn't want her mother to see. "Yeah, sure." She said, taking the bottle of water being held out for her.
"Still no change?" Angela asked as she nervously pushed some hair behind her ear because she wasn't sure what else she could say. When Jane just shook her head, her heart broke a little more for the woman who had become like a second daughter to her. "She'll be okay… it just takes time and patience." She wanted to believe it even though she wasn't sure she did.
"Thought I would do a little pressure washing… get out of the house for a bit but not too far in case she needs me." Jane tried to shrug away her unease as she rubbed the back of her neck.
"I guess it's good to keep busy." Angela sighed as she crossed her arms and admired the fence. Giving Jane a sideways glance, she noticed that the cut on her face was almost completely healed, the stitches having already been removed. The only evidence of the cut was a pink line but the wounds that couldn't be seen were still fresh and painful. Even though Jane seemed to be doing well, she worried about Maura and the lasting effects of her horrific experience at the hands of Kelly.
"Yeah…" Jane started to say but was interrupted by her cellphone ringing in her back pocket. Pulling it out, she looked down at it to see that it was Liam and some measure of relief took over because he had been there every day to help with the kids and also to spend time with Maura. "Hey, what's up?" She said as she answered it.
"Things still the same?" He asked without hesitation.
"Yeah…" she let out a sigh of frustration.
"Okay, well… I'm coming over to get her and take her to see Paddy."
"I'm not sure she'll go for that and I'm also not sure that's a good idea." Jane bit down on her bottom lip at the prospect of trying to get Maura up and out of the house.
"Doesn't matter. I'll carry her to the car in her pajamas if I have to but she needs to talk to him. The police have exonerated her of any wrongdoing and Paddy has cleared the air with Kelly's father. Maura needs to know this is over… there will be no retaliation."
Jane knew that the only thing Maura was guilty of was trying to save Kelly's life but there was a sense of relief that washed over her at the official declaration. "Okay, I'll see what I can do. When will you be here?"
"Ten minutes…" Liam said before hanging up the phone.
Taking off the hat she was wearing to keep her hair from her eyes, Jane wiped at her forehead again and let out a heavy sigh. "Liam's on the way over…"
"He's been here every day since…" Angela's voice trailed off because she wasn't sure what to call what had happened to them… perhaps 'the incident'.
"Yeah, well this time he wants to take her to see Paddy."
"I'm not sure that's a good idea." The hair on the back of Angela's neck stood up at the thought of Maura seeing the man who had caused so much pain for her family.
"Well…" Jane shook her head and then closed her eyes for a second. "I'm willing to try anything to get her back."
Angela reached out and pulled Jane into a hug with little resistance. For a moment, they remained silent as she held Jane tightly in her arms trying to pour all of her love and strength into her daughter. "Why don't I see if Constance can take Li for the night since I'm gonna have Valley… maybe give you and Maura some time alone."
"Oh, yeah… I forgot you were gonna take her to the movie tonight." Jane reluctantly pulled away from the comfort of her mother's arms. "I suppose that might be good. After seeing Paddy, she might need some space."
"Okay, I'll take care of it. If she can't, we'll just go to the movie another time." Angela reasoned because she knew that Jane and Maura needed some time to process all that had happened to them.
"I guess I'd better put this stuff away and head up to tell Maura the plan. She's not gonna like it… in fact, getting her to agree… well, I'm pretty sure there's gonna be an argument."
"Well, at least Liam will be here to help you." Angela offered a small smile as she reached out to touch Jane on the cheek. "I love you, Janie and I love Maura as if she was my own daughter. Whatever you have to do to get her back… do it."
"I know Ma. I'm trying…" Jane's voice trailed off as she accepted the offer of comfort and support from her mother.
"I'll pick Valley up from preschool and let you know who's going to take Li for the night..." Angela said as she turned to leave with a small wave.
"Thanks, Ma…" Jane offered her own smile even though it didn't quite reach her eyes.
When she found herself alone, Jane let out a frustrated huff as she started to roll the hose up and gather the pressure washer to put it away in the garage. It didn't take her long, and just as she was finishing up, Liam pulled up and she waved at him. Watching him climb out of the car, she had an overwhelming feeling of gratefulness for his presence and support over the past few years, she just hoped he would be able to help Maura come back to them.
"You ready for this?" He asked as he approached her with a grim expression on his face.
"No…" Jane shook her head and frowned at the thought of the two of them ganging up on Maura to get her to comply. "You know how I feel about Paddy, but at this point… I'll try anything."
"Good because this is what she needs. I don't expect a change overnight but I think this will finally give her the closure she needs to move forward." He shrugged his shoulders because he was also worried.
"Well then… by all means… let's get this show on the road." Jane sighed heavily as the gravity of what they were about to do weighed heavily on her. But that was the way it had to be…
YYY
Maura lay on her side with her eyes closed and the covers pulled up to her chin. The room was warm with the heat of the early afternoon but she didn't care as she snuggled further under the blankets sealing herself up in a cocoon of self-isolation. She could hear Jane moving around downstairs and let out a sigh of relief. Now there was someone else who could care for Li because after getting up, changing him, and giving him a bottle earlier while Jane was outside, she didn't have the energy to do it again just yet. Now she could concentrate on slipping away on the cloud of unconsciousness that seemed to be the only reprieve from the thoughts and images that still haunted her.
The sound of Jane coming up the stairs caused Maura to close her eyes tighter with the hopes that she would be left alone and for a brief second she thought that maybe she would get her solitude but then the bed dipped down next to her and she knew it wasn't to be. With a frustrated huff, she opened her eyes to find that it wasn't Jane sitting on the bed next to her but Liam.
"I'd ask how you were doing but it seems as if you are in the same place you were the last time I saw you..." Liam said as he looked down at Maura with a concerned expression.
Maura didn't say anything because there wasn't anything to say. What he said was true and she had no defense for it. Instead, she looked away from his dark expression and pulled the covers just a little higher.
"I need you to get up and get dressed. This isn't a request…" he gave her a stern look before glancing at Jane who was leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed and a pensive expression on her face.
With a frown, Maura looked at Liam as if she didn't understand what he was asking her to do. Shaking her head, she hoped she would get the hint without her having to actually say 'no'.
"Maura…" Liam said her name with a sigh. "We need to go see Paddy. I think it will help."
This time Maura shook her head vigorously and shrank back from him. She had no intention of leaving the house, especially not to visit Paddy. That was asking too much of her at the moment. She needed some time to get past the guilt she was feeling for not being able to save Kelly from herself.
"Maura, please…" Jane finally spoke, her voice filled with pain and sadness.
Glancing over at Jane, Maura could see the hurt written all over Jane's face, and then she suddenly realized that she was the cause. It had been almost two weeks and she had essentially shut Jane out since that fateful day that had changed their lives.
"There are things Paddy needs to discuss with you… I think it will help." Liam said as he gave Maura's shoulder a gentle squeeze. "It's time we move past this."
"Move past this?" Maura finally spoke, her voice raspy from her previous silence. "How do you expect me to get past this? I let someone die… I couldn't protect my son…" her voice trailed off.
"None of that is true, Maur… and you know it." Jane pushed away from the door frame and dropped her arms to her sides.
Maura looked away from Jane as she tried to grapple with the guilt of letting someone die and the guilt of shutting her family out. The realization that she was pushing Jane away hit her hard and with a heavy heart, she knew what she had to do. "Okay, I'll go…" her voice was barely a whisper as she pushed the covers off of herself. "I'll need to take a shower first."
With a nod, Liam pushed himself up from the bed and gave Jane a quick nod as he left the room. "I'll be downstairs waiting on you." He said over his shoulder.
Jane waited until they were alone to move over to the bed to stand next to Maura, unsure if she should reach out and touch her or keep her distance. When Maura finally stood up, she didn't hesitate anymore as she reached out and pulled Maura into a hug.
"I miss you…" the words were whispered against Maura's ear, causing her to shiver.
"I miss you, too…" Maura sighed against the strong arms holding her tightly. It was the truth and she hadn't realized until that moment how true it was. "I'm going to try harder…" she didn't finish because wasn't sure what word she was searching for. She could feel Jane nod against her shoulder as if she understood what Maura wasn't saying.
"I know…" It was all Jane could say before she let Maura go so she could get ready. "I'll be right here waiting on you." She said with a small smile.
With a nod of understanding, Maura headed towards the bathroom so she could get ready, leaving Jane alone with her thoughts. As she watched Maura disappear behind the door, Jane let out a long-held breath and said a small, silent prayer that everything would be okay. It had to be because she didn't know what to do if it wasn't.
YYY
Maura sat across the table from Paddy with an impassive expression on her face as he studied her with concern. It unnerved her to be under his scrutiny and it caused her to shift uncomfortably in her chair drawing attention to her unease.
"How have you been?" He asked.
Taking a deep breath before she answered, Maura let it out slowly, making a sound like a deflating balloon. "I've been better…" her voice trailed off as she looked up at the ceiling, unable to take his penetrating gaze anymore. Their eyes may be the same color but there was a shrewdness in his that caused her to shiver.
"You look tired." He said as he leaned back and crossed his arms.
Nodding in understanding, Maura wasn't sure what else she could say. She had pretty much been in bed under the covers since that horrible day but sleep had mostly alluded her as the nightmares took over every time she shut her eyes. "I haven't been sleeping well…" she brought her eyes back to meet his.
"I know it's hard to get past something like this but we both know that if you continue to pull away from your family… Kelly's won."
"Don't you think I know that?" Maura's temper flared. It felt good to get angry and not feel numb anymore.
"I do think you know… so why… this?" He held his arms out as if to indicate it represented all the things he was referring to.
"You've talked to Jane?" She asked, unsure if she wanted to know the answer.
"I have… and Liam. They're both concerned about you… and well…" he hesitated. "I am too."
"What do you think you can do to help me that they can't?" Her voice was filled with irritation at the implication he could help where Jane and Liam failed.
"Well, to start with… we both know that what happened wasn't your fault." His statement caused Maura to huff with impatience. For a minute, he studied her without saying anything as he tried to gauge the best way to reach her. "It… wasn't... your... fault." The words came out firm and with a heavy resolve as he stared her down, daring her to argue. When she didn't, he cleared his throat and then continued to speak. "I've been in contact with Alan and we both agree this is over. There will be no retaliation against you, Jane, or any of your family."
Maura blinked a few times as the weight of what he said sunk in. The fear that this wasn't over because she couldn't save Kelly was one of the things that kept her shut inside of herself. With this new revelation, she could feel a measure of relief but the guilt of not being able to do anything was still a heavy burden to carry.
"No looking over your shoulder anymore… it's settled."
Dropping her gaze down to look at her hands folded in her lap, she nodded but couldn't find the words to express the relief she was feeling.
"It's over Maura…" Paddy offered her a small smile of reconciliation. "Please understand that you did all you could to save her… even her father knows this."
As Maura continued to look down at her hands, she took a few deep breaths to stay the tears that were threatening to fall. "I should have done more."
"Maybe… maybe not. But she would have never given up and you and Jane would have spent the rest of your lives running from her insanity. You know that."
"Maybe… maybe not." Maura couldn't stop herself from throwing his words back at him. She knew he was right but she still wasn't ready to let go of the responsibility of letting someone die.
Another lull filled the room with silence as Paddy watched Maura with a measured eye. "You didn't let her die." He finally said as if he could read her mind, causing her to look up at him in surprise. "I know you better than you think."
Suddenly the weight of the world didn't weigh so heavily on her shoulders as she allowed herself to accept that he was right. Of course, she knew he was right… she knew Jane and Liam were right as well, but for some reason, she just couldn't let herself believe it… at least not until that moment. She had done everything she could and her biggest fear was that Kelly's family wouldn't let it go, but now she knew everyone involved now accepted it was over… it was time she did the same.
"Go home, Maura… hug your kids… kiss your wife… do all the things that make you happy. You deserve it. It's over…" Paddy let out a heavy sigh. He could see by the expression on her face that his words had finally reached her.
"You're right…" she said, allowing her shoulders to drop in surrender. She was tired of fighting the fear that had almost paralyzed her. It was now time to face the future with a renewed lease on life… a life free from Kelly. "And… thank you." The words were easier to say this time because she meant them from the bottom of her heart.
"Give my granddaughter and…" he paused only long enough to take a deep breath before continuing. "And my grandson a hug for me."
With a small smile, Maura nodded as she pushed herself up from the table they were sitting at. "I will…" she said over her shoulder as she left Paddy. And with that last statement, her heart began to speed up at the thought of going home to her family and finally letting go of all the things that had been haunting her over the past two weeks. But most of all, she wanted to get home and feel wrapped in Jane's arms where she felt safe and taken care of. It was time to let it all go and accept the love and support of those who wanted nothing but the best for her.
YYY
"Are you okay?" Liam asked, pulling up in the driveway of Jane and Maura's house. He gave Maura a sideways glance as he asked.
Maura was quiet for a minute as she gathered her thoughts. They hadn't spoken much on the drive home but she knew he had been holding back the questions long enough. "Yeah… I think so." She nodded as she took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked hopefully.
"Maybe… later…?" It came out more like a question than a declaration. "I think I need to talk to Jane first."
Liam tried not to look disappointed but he couldn't hide the small frown that appeared on his face. "I understand…" he let out a sigh and dropped his shoulders slightly.
"Thank you for…" she paused as she tried to think of a more sophisticated word than 'makeing' and only continuing when she did. "Encouraging me to go see Paddy. It helped a lot."
Nodding, he accepted her gratitude with a small smile. "Is it over?" He couldn't stop himself from asking even though he already knew the answer.
"It is." Maura undid her seat belt as she turned in her seat to look at him. "But it's going to take some time for me to let go of the guilt… but at least the fear of retribution is gone."
"Good… we've all been worried about you. I'm glad to hear you're finally coming around."
"I am, but as I said… it's going to take some time."
"Well, I guess you should get in there and tell your girl…" Liam nodded towards the house.
"Would you like to come in?" Maura asked to be polite.
"Nah… I'm gonna have dinner with Constance and Bree tonight, but thanks. You go on and git… I'm sure Jane is chomping at the bit to see you. It took some convincing to make her stay home but… it was for the best, I think." Liam offered Maura the first genuine smile in a while.
"Thanks again for everything… not just today."
"Let me know when you get back to your routine, I'd like to talk to you and Jane about a business idea I have… and maybe an investment opportunity for you."
"Sure…" Maura couldn't help but give him a curious sideways glance. "You want to give me a hint?"
"No, we'll chat later. You go on…" he waved his hand towards the door. "I'll check in with you all later."
Turning the handle on the car door, Maura pushed it open and stepped out. "I'll see you later and… well… thanks again."
"No more thank-you's… we're family. Let's just move forward from today… okay?" He said with a wave of his hand.
Closing the door, Maura glanced back and then watched as Liam backed out of the driveway. She stood for a minute, unable to move from the spot her feet seemed to be stuck too and contemplated what she should say to Jane. Although she felt much better after having talked with Paddy, she still carried an immense amount of guilt for what had happened to Kelly. But she did realize that it was time to work towards healing because if she didn't then it was for naught.
With a heavy sigh, she pushed forward towards the front door with a much lighter feeling in her heart and a need she hadn't had in far too long. That little flicker of anticipation started to grow deep within her and her body hummed with thoughts of wrapping herself in all things Jane causing her to move just a little faster until she was slipping through the front door.
The house was noticeably quiet without the hustle and bustle that usually greeted her in the late afternoon. The sound of Valley racing around the house expending her after-school energy or Li babbling off in the distance was absent as she moved down the hall towards the living room. At first, she thought the house was empty until she saw a splay of dark hair hanging over the arm of the couch indicating that Jane was napping. The absence of their children piqued her curiosity so she moved to stand over Jane's long, lean body stretched out on the worn leather couch and a small smile curled at her lips.
Jane's eyes were closed and she was laying on her side with her hands tucked up under her chin. Her breathing was even indicating she was sleeping and the need to touch her almost overwhelmed Maura. As she stood over Jane studying her with a newfound resolve to move past all the things that could have torn them apart, she decided she had waited long enough so she dropped down on the small space next to Jane's sleeping body. She thought the movement might have disturbed Jane from her nap but it didn't and it only reinforced how much Jane had been working alone for the past few weeks and a wave of guilt washed over her. Swallowing back the emotion that threatened to bubble up from her chest, she took a deep breath and then reached out to run the backs of her fingers over Jane's cheek. It was soft and warm, and Maura took a shaky breath as the feeling of Jane's skin against her own sent ripples of want and need cascading over her.
Blinking her eyes open, Jane became aware that she wasn't alone. When she felt a light tickle on her cheek, it caused her to wiggle her nose and then reach for the itch that had woken her up. To her surprise, she found a hand hovering over her instead, and then she lifted her gaze to find Maura looking down at her with a soft smile. There was something different in the way that Maura was looking at her, a light in her hazel-green eyes that hadn't been there in quite a while, and it sent a thrill through Jane.
"Hey, you're back…" Jane's voice was raspy from having just woken up.
Maura's smile slipped into a sexy grin at the huskiness of Jane's voice. "I am… in more ways than one."
A slight frown creased Jane's brow as she tried to understand what Maura meant but then understanding hit her causing her to smile. "Really?" She asked as she pushed herself up on her elbows. "Just like that?" There was a slight tinge of skepticism in her tone but only because she didn't want to believe that Paddy had accomplished what she hadn't been able to.
Nodding, Maura moved her hand to run her fingers through Jane's silky, black hair. "Yes and no… not just like that." She hesitated briefly as the need to feel Jane pressed against her almost overwhelmed her. "But, we'll talk later… okay?" Jane nodded and continued to watch Maura with some measure of uncertainty. "Where are the kids?" She wondered as she looked around the living room trying to find some evidence that they were home.
"Um… Valley's at the movie with Ma and Li is with Constance and Bree…" A slow, sly grin spread across Jane's lips as she continued. "For the night…" she offered a quick wink and noticed that it caused Maura to visibly shiver.
"Really…?" Maura bit down on her bottom lip in that way she knew would rile Jane up. She needed Jane… needed to feel her… touch her… taste her… she needed all the things she had been missing out on but she also couldn't bring herself to ask for them, so she leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Jane's cheek. "I'm going up to take another shower…" her voice trailed off as she pushed up from where she was sitting. She hoped that Jane would pick up on the energy flowing between them and that she wouldn't have to take that shower alone but it was up to Jane to follow her without having to be asked.
"Oh…" Jane's shoulders slumped slightly at what she thought was a dismissal. But as she watched Maura walk away with an extra sway in her hips and a quick, smoldering glance over her shoulder, Jane realized she was being silently summoned. She knew that look Maura was giving her right now and it caused her heart rate to pick up at the implications of what it meant.
For a minute, Jane sat on the couch immobile and unsure of what she should do next. Of course, she had recognized the look that Maura had given her but she also couldn't help but wonder if perhaps Maura wasn't quite as ready as she thought she was. Her need was so palatable that she could almost taste the sweetness of Maura's lips on her own but at what cost, she wasn't sure.
Taking a deep breath, she contemplated what she should do when it occurred to her that Maura had been the one to touch her first and the light of hope flickered in her chest. She wasn't pushing Maura to do anything she didn't want to and with new clarity, she realized that Maura was indeed ready to move on. This new revelation caused her to jump up from the couch and jog up the stairs towards their bathroom where she hoped she would find Maura waiting for her.
Maura stood at the top of the stairs listening intently for Jane's footsteps, hoping that she was following her but when she didn't hear anything her heart sank. That sinking feeling only lasted for a second because the sound of the worn, leather couch creaking carried to her and she realized that Jane had gotten up and was indeed following her up the stairs. So with a new feeling of assurance, she headed towards the bathroom without looking back and began to strip away what was left of the day as she went, leaving her jeans in a bunch by the bedroom door… followed by her t-shirt, bra, and underwear.
When she stepped into the bathroom, the tile was cold on her feet and her body yearned for the warmth of the water that would cleanse her of the stench from the guilt that still clung to her. Without having to turn around, she could feel Jane's presence and her body began to yearn for a different kind of warmth… one that she could only find in Jane's arms.
Reaching into the shower, Maura turned the nozzle up and waited until the water coming from the shower head above was filling the room with steam. She took a deep breath and reveled in the warmth that filled her chest, clearing both her body and mind from the things that once haunted her. There was movement behind her and a small smile curled her lips at the thought of Jane stripping down to join her but she didn't wait as she stepped into the shower and let the hot water tame her screaming muscles. She couldn't help but marvel at the fact that her whole body was sore from her inactivity and she desperately wanted a different reason for the aches and pains that plagued her at the moment.
It didn't take Jane long to strip out of her clothes as she watched Maura disappear into the shower stall. Her stomach tightened at the sight of Maura's naked body with all of its dips and curves… those same dips and curves she knew so well and couldn't wait to reacquaint herself with. In her eyes, Maura's body was perfection and her skin buzzed with the anticipation of devouring all that had, just seconds before, been visible to her.
As the steam continued to fill the room, Jane waited to give Maura a chance to change her mind but when she saw Maura's hand reach out and a crooked finger in a come-hither motion, it was all she needed to make her advance and finally take what she had been craving for so long. Taking several long strides across the room, she only hesitated for a second before stepping under the steady stream of hot water falling from above. She didn't waste any time in satisfying her need to touch as she wrapped her arms around Maura's waist from behind, pressing herself into the soft, subtle body in front of her. Her nipples hardened against Maura's slick skin and she couldn't stop the moan that escaped from her lips or the shiver that ran through her body. She pressed her palms against Maura's stomach and ran her lips along the long expanse of the skin at Maura's neck. This time it was Maura who moaned as she put her own hands on top of Jane's, pushing them down to where she needed them most. But Jane held firm, not allowing her hands to be moved causing Maura to let out a frustrated huff.
"Not so fast…" Jane whispered into Maura's ear as she trailed her fingertips up to Maura's full breasts. Cupping them in her hands, she gave a gentle squeeze before brushing her thumbs over Maura's nipples. She let out a sigh at the feeling of them hardening under her touch as Maura arched her back attempting to chase down the skin-on-skin contact she was craving. "I've missed you…" she pressed a kiss to the back of Maura's shoulder. "I've missed this…" the words were accompanied by a gentle squeeze again.
"I need you to touch me… please Jane…" Maura gasped as she grabbed Jane's left hand and pushed it down her slick stomach, gliding further down to where she was now aching to be touched.
"Hmmm…" Jane murmured against the wet skin at her lips as she allowed Maura to guide her hand lower. When her fingers slipped down between Maura's legs, she let out a low growl at the hot, sticky wetness that greeted her touch. She knew Maura was ready and needed this quick release. It had been building up in both of them and she wanted nothing more than to finally give Maura the release she craved… no… needed.
"Oh, God…" Maura pressed her backside into Jane as she opened herself up to exploring fingers. Her breathing picked up when those fingers found purchase inside of her, thrusting in slow, gentle strokes. She threw her hands out to brace herself against the shower wall as Jane continued to dip her fingers further and further… in and out, only stopping to make tiny circles over the throbbing bundle of nerves that ached for attention.
The muscles in Jane's forearm began to cramp slightly as she picked up the pace of her strokes while her fingers continued to move between shaking legs but nothing would stop her from bringing Maura over the edge. She knew Maura was close by the movement of her hips moving faster, seeking something deeper… something stronger, and she wanted nothing more than to fill Maura with her love.
When her legs began to shake, Maura could feel herself cresting in the palm of Jane's hand. "Yes… faster…" she panted with each stroke of Jane's fingers inside of her. Reaching down, she pressed her hand into Jane's to hold her where she needed her most as her hips jerked towards the touch that would inevitably bring the climax she desperately needed. "Oh God… oh… fuck… yes…" she ground out through clenched teeth as her body began to stiffen and the coil of pleasure that had been wrapped so tightly inside of her started to unravel. The warmth that had pooled in her center was now seeping out to her arms and legs causing her to slam her eyelids shut. This was it… the moment of reckoning and she was ready to give herself over it. There would be no barriers between them, never again and as a kaleidoscope of lights burst behind Maura's closed eyes, she let the truth that their love was eternal wash over her and when she finally cried out as white, hot pleasure rippled through her body, she knew that there was more to it… there was something primal in the moan that came from deep within her. All the anxiety, fear, and guilt she had been feeling shattered within her, turning to dust that would blow away with each breath she let out. Nothing would ever take her away from her family again… nothing would ever take her away from Jane. As her absolution poured from her, it was washed away by the hot water that poured over them and by Jane's touch. After a few long deep breaths, she finally accepted the calm she had been seeking from within along with the safety and reassurance of Jane's arms around her, holding her up… catching her from the edge… keeping her from disappearing forever.