Author's Notes: Thank you all for your reviews, I'm glad you're enjoying this crazy ride with me, and I hope it continues to be worth your while. Obligatory shout out that this fic has a TVTropes page now, and it really needs some love.
Chapter 9: Gateway to the Grand Line!
The sun was shining in a bright blue sky, gentle breezes dancing amidst the waves as the Milka ploughed ever-onwards, sailing towards its destiny. The lazy calm was shattered as Umok's voice boomed from the crow's nest, splitting the air with the brutality of a thunderclap, carrying from the top of the ship all the way to the depths of the hold.
"Loguetown Island, dead ahead!"
"Oh-nonononoooohhhshiii!"
SPLASH
"And Nabiki just fell overboard again! Somebody fish her out!"
Ranma sighed as he walked over to the gunwale. "The point of the exercise, Nabiki, is to stay on the railing..."
Even as he said this, he deftly uncoiled a length of rope from one of the ever-present hooks and flung it over the side to splash into the water.
Moments later, Nabiki's head rose above the railings, casting Ranma a sour look before she clambered fully aboard, dripping wet. "Why am I even doing this?"
"You need to work on your balance. Would you rather learn how to fall the way I did, without nice soft water to cushion your landing?" Ranma asked, with blatantly feigned sweetness.
Nabiki just scowled at him. "I can't believe you're still taking this so seriously... you didn't try to train Akane like this!"
"Akane wasn't putting her life on the line just by walking down the street," Ranma reminded her.
The eldest member of their pirate crew winced, instinctively clutching at her neck as the memories surfaced. "I hate when you're right..."
Ranma just grinned a little, before turning his back on her and walking down to the prow, where the rest of the crew were gathered. Nabiki followed him quietly, joining the crowd as they stared across the water at their destination.
Strictly speaking, it wasn't that impressive. It was a middling sized island, a single large hump of a hill rising from the ocean. But what made it noteworthy was the way it was absolutely covered in buildings, making it the most civilized island they'd stumbled across so far. Dozens of ships drifted through the waters, docking and setting sail, making it clear that industry was thriving here.
"Loguetown..." Ranma murmured.
"Gateway to the Grand Line. Birthplace of the King of the Pirates, and where he met his ultimate fate," Umok mused, nodding sagely. "I can taste the emotional resonance from here... this is a place of destiny."
"So what's the plan, 'captain'?" Nabiki drawled.
"Straight ahead and full speed; we'll dock first and set things straight from there," Ranma replied decisively.
"Does that mean we should take down our flag?" Kodachi asked, a hint of disappointment in her words at the thought.
Wordlessly, they all looked up at the top of the main mast, where Kodachi's creation now flapped proudly in the breeze. Everyone had been forced to admit that the Kuno girl had talent when she'd unveiled her work; a grinning skull set against a whirling tornado, with flying fists circling the skull. Even the stitchmark along the upper portion of the skull, which Kodachi had sheepishly confessed was a result of an accidental tear, seemed to just make the image work.
Ranma slowly shook his head. "Nah... we already know the marines can identify us just from the figurehead, so no point in trying to disguise it. Besides, we're trying to get rid of that stupid name they gave us."
"Knowing our luck, they might just think we're a new batch of pirates who stole this ship from ourselves," Ryoga grunted.
"Besides, if this is the big gateway to the Grand Line, they must get pirates passing through here all the time, right? Nobody should kick up any fuss if we don't make trouble" Nabiki pointed out.
Soon afterwards...
Despite their earlier bold words, the tension hung thick as the Milka sailed silently into Loguetown's main port. Ryoga idly juggled a cannonball, bouncing it up and down in one palm as if it were a baseball. Shampoo crouched atop the mast's yard, sword in hand, sporadically shifting from demibeast form to halfbeast form and back again. Even Nabiki was pointedly lingering near the door to the ship's interior, ready to flee to safety at a moment's notice.
But, fortunately, nobody paid the pirate crew that much attention. Stray glances were thrown their way, but nothing in the way of an organized assault or resistance surfaced, and the newly-minted Kamikaze Pirates visibly relaxed. They sailed into an available space, docked with anchor and rope, and strode down the gangway onto the pier.
Once they had paid their docking fees, Ranma turned to the group. "Okay, firstly, we need to stock up on supplies here. Remember what Zeff told us about the Grand Line; at the very least, we'll need outfits for all four kinds of seasonal islands, and we'll need at least two Log Poses, because I for one don't fancy our chances of trying to navigate the Grand Line blind. Grab anything else you can think of that might be useful, but those are what we need to get first. But secondly...this could be the last chance we have to spend some time on dry land for a while, so we ought to make the most of it, too. Nothing wrong with staying here for a few days just to boost morale..."
"If we can keep from getting into trouble," Ryoga grumbled.
Ranma bit back a sigh, but forced himself to look optimistic. "Yeah, I know we don't exactly have the best record for doing things peacefully, but we have actually gotten better! I mean, we've been traveling together for nearly two months, and none of us are dead yet!"
The other teens simply looked at him flatly.
"There is such a thing as damning with faint praise, Ranma darling," Kodachi observed dryly.
"Well, if we taking time to spend on dry land, then Shampoo want Ranma come and spar with Shampoo first!" the Chinese Amazon declared.
"Whatever for?" a surprised Kodachi asked her.
"Shampoo need test new body! Book say Zoan Fruit give Shampoo powers, but little boat in middle of sea is no place to really test anything. Shampoo need put new body through paces, find out what Shampoo can do now, and best one to help Shampoo with that is Ranma!"
"Just because you think he's engaged to you, doesn't mean you need to hype him up so much, Shampoo," Ukyo sarcastically drawled.
"Shampoo not think, Shampoo know! Anyway, Shampoo not just want Ranma because Ranma such good martial artist, Shampoo want Ranma because Ranma fight with Shampoo before, so Ranma best judge of any changes to Shampoo!" the indignant Chinese Amazon cabbit-girl pointed out in response.
Ranma hesitantly scratched the back of his head. 'Well... it's always risking trouble to be with just one of the girls, but she does make a really valid point... and if I want to keep her safe, I should help her figure out how her new powers work...'
Finally, he nodded. "Alright, Shampoo, you're right. I'll help ya test the new you at last."
Shampoo cheered and bounced on the spot in glee, clasping her hands together in joy. Ukyo and Kodachi threw jealous glances at their Chinese rival, before Ukyo spoke up.
"You planning on sparring here in the middle of the street? Because I don't think the Marines would take kindly to that..."
"Is only island. We circle coast far enough, we find empty beach somewhere we no get in trouble," Shampoo scoffed.
"You girls be alright handling the shopping while I'm gone?" Ranma asked.
"Oh, sure, no worries, Ranma. A little shopping spree sounds like the most normal thing we've done all week," Nabiki replied flippantly, waving her hand dismissively.
Ryoga scoffed. "And lemme guess; I'm supposed to sit on the damn boat and guard it..."
At that, Ranma gave him a puzzled look. "Uh... no? I was going to suggest you take Umok with you and go for a walk. Stretch your legs, look up some street performers, buy a coffee, do something to entertain yourself."
Now Ryoga looked confused. "Wait, what?"
"I trust you to look after yourself and keep out of trouble just fine, why would I order you to stay at the ship? The only problem is making sure that you find your way back to us, and Umok can take care of that," Ranma added.
Ryoga stared blankly back at his captain, completely dumbstruck.
'Ranma... trusts me? Am I dreaming?'
"Suits me fine. I was hoping to do some exploration myself," Umok confessed, lazily bobbing over to hover by Ryoga's shoulder.
"Then it's settled! C'mon, Shampoo, race ya!" Ranma said, before suddenly exploding into action, sprinting away from the group at breakneck speed.
The Chinese cabbit-girl let out a wordless squawk of protest and rocketed after her reluctantly betrothed captain. "No fair, airen!"
In the span of a heartbeat, the two teens were little more than human-sized blurs, streaking through the crowds so fast that many passers-by didn't even realize the teenage pirates were there until the wind of their passage ruffled their clothing. Even as the remaining members of the Kamikaze Pirates watched, the foremost blur sprang upwards in a crimson arc that descended to a rooftop and then bounced to the next, Shampoo hot on Ranma's heels as they began leaping from building to building like giant fleas.
"And there he goes... couldn't wait to be rid of us. I really don't get what you girls see in him," Nabiki mused aloud.
"Ah, Miss Tendo, your imagination needs work. That vivaciousness, that love of life? That is one of Ranma darling's many charms," Kodachi chortled - a softer, more melodious sound than her archetypal shriek of near-hysterical glee.
"What she said," Ukyo added, nodding sagely.
"Yeah, well, you girls have fun shopping. C'mon, Umok," Ryoga grunted, before turning and striding off in a random direction.
With Ranma and Shampoo...
Eventually, the two martial artists found themselves having left Loguetown city behind them and entering the wilderness on its fringes. Specifically, they entered a pebble beach, a mass of smooth-worn stones lying in the hollowed out space at the bottom of eroding cliffs, too steep and shallow and rocky for anybody to bother building here... yet.
Stones clacked and crackled underfoot as the teens sprinted across the beach, literally skidding to a halt and carving shallow trenches with their momentum in a brief burst of childishness. Ranma looked over the desolation and nodded approvingly.
"Yeah, this is perfect... nobody's gonna complain if we wreck things here!"
"Too-too good! Shampoo eager to break something!" the Chinese Amazon purred, cracking her knuckles.
"Alright, so, we're here to test out your Zoan powers...hm... this might be a good chance to try testing some of your more esoteric abilities," Ranma mused, idly thumping a fist into an upheld palm.
"Es-oh-teric?" Shampoo slowly repeated, frowning as she tried to understand the foreign word.
"Eh, I heard Kodachi use it once," Ranma confessed with a sheepish shrug. "Basically, we know this fruit is supposed to make you faster, more agile and maybe even stronger, but we should try some of the less obvious animal tricks. Rabbits are great at digging; can you dig like a rabbit? Rabbits are renowned for their hearing; has that affected your blind-fighting skills? And don't forget, Umok suggested you might have -ergh! - cat powers, too. Do you have claws? How's your nightvision?"
"Is too-too good now. Shampoo can see in near-pitch black like it were day!" the Chinese cabbit responded. "As for claws... yes, Shampoo have them, when Shampoo go half-beast."
"What about in this form? Cat's claws are retractile, maybe you can extend your fingernails into claws now?" Ranma pointed out.
"...Huh. Shampoo never think to try," she confessed, staring at Ranma in wonder. She held her hands up, palms towards her face, and concentrated, trying to flex muscles that she had previously associated with her alternate forms. As she did, ten little nails - which she finally realized were noticeably longer and pointier-looking than they had been before, even given the roughness of their environment - sprouted outwards into six-inch-long talons.
"...You look at that," Shampoo muttered, flexing her fingers experimentally, watching her claws glitter in the light.
"Well, that's something we've learned... we know you can dig pretty good as a rabbit...cabbit, whatever, but what about when you're more humanoid?" Ranma suggested. "But, before that... maybe we should start with some basic tests?"
"Sound good to Shampoo!" she chirped, claws vanishing back into their sheathes.
"Alright, speed is the obvious power of the rabbit, so let's try a little sparring session, see if you can hit me for once," Ranma smirked, striking a fighter's pose with his right arm forward and left arm bent horizontally to his torso.
Shampoo grinned a feral grin, rolling her neck to the side until the bones cracked, "Oh, airen, Shampoo wait to hear you say that!"
Without preamble, she launched herself at Ranma, fists flashing in a blindingly fast flurry of strikes and combos... which Ranma intercepted almost effortlessly, dodging some and parrying others with impossibly deft jabs and motions from his own hands. Shampoo twisted and curled impossibly, sharp cries and gasps of effort spilling from her lips as she attacked, but Ranma defended himself with eerie quiet, his gaze unwavering as he studied every move Shampoo made.
Seeing that punches were doing no good, Shampoo tried to kick, snapping out first one leg and then the other. Both times, Ranma dodged, only to leap back and hold up a hand, at which Shampoo immediately stopped in her tracks. Her whole body tingling with nervous energy, Shampoo watched her fiancé intently, anxious for his analysis.
"...You've definitely gotten faster, Shampoo. You were always the quickest girl I knew, but your speed has definitely improved. The kicks in particular, those are a lot faster than I remember you using them! But I can't really say if it's because of your Devil Fruit or just because you've been training harder since we came here," Ranma confessed.
Shampoo visibly wilted, ears drooping as she hung her head. "So, there no point...?"
"Hey, don't forget, you've got another form now! We haven't tested out what half-beast can do, and according to that book we found, the hybrid form is supposed to be what really brings out the best in a Zoan! So just change shapes and we'll try that again," Ranma told her firmly.
Shampoo brightened up and nodded. "Okay, airen!"
Closing her eyes, she concentrated, and Ranma watched as his Chinese Amazon shifted from a cute girl with pseudo-bunny ears on her head into something more bestial looking. 'Wow, that transformation is quick! Bet she could really shift between forms on the fly if practiced doing so!"
"Damnit!"
"What's wrong, Shampoo?!" Ranma barked, snapped from his thoughts by the sudden, uncharacteristic curse.
"Stupid half-beast feet break Shampoo's shoes!" the cabbit-girl grumbled, pointing indignantly at her enlarged paws, which had visibly burst out of shoes intended for a much smaller, daintier, human-like foot.
"Are you okay? Should we find somewhere else?" Ranma asked, looking over their stoney environment with a new eye.
Shampoo shook her head stubbornly. "No, Shampoo fine. Stupid beast-feet have pawpads anyway."
Kicking aside the shredded remnants of her shoes, and sparing a moment's thought to be grateful they weren't the good silk slippers she'd brought with her from Nerima, Shampoo confidently assumed a battle-ready pose. "Alright, airen, when we start?"
Ranma struck a mirroring pose. "Ready when you are!"
'Let's see how fast she-'
And just like that, Shampoo was in Ranma's face without seeming to have covered the intervening distance, arm drawn back with obvious intent.
'WaitwhattheBLOCK!'
Caught off guard by Shampoo's attack, Ranma didn't even have time to try dodging, instead snapping his arms together protectively in front of his torso just in time to catch the cabbit-girl's punch on his forearms. The impact slammed into him like a tidal wave, propelling him backwards through the scree despite his attempts to brace, his heels digging trenches in the clattering stones for a good three or four meters before he bled off the moment and skidded to a halt, barely managing to keep from toppling over backwards as a result.
Shampoo stared at her fist as if she'd never seen it before. "Sh-Shampoo do that...? No, wait, airen! Is you okay?!"
"Y-yeah, I'm fine, Shampoo," Ranma replied, although his words were undercut by the way he was grimacing and shaking his arms for relief from the pain of being struck. 'Nothing broken but... sonuvva! The last guy to hit me that hard through a block was Ryoga!'
Pushing through the pain, Ranma put on a somewhat crooked smile. "Well, that definitely confirms you're faster in this form! But let's try that again... I wanna test something."
"Okay, airen, if you sure..." Shampoo replied, a little uncertainly, but doing her best to bury it with the knowledge that Ranma was actually taking an interest in her for once.
Meanwhile, in the port markets...
"You know... when I said we were going shopping, I more had the dress shops and jewelry places in mind," Nabiki dryly quipped.
"Oh, we'll be hitting those next, of course, but we're right here now, so we might as well begin with the groceries," Kodachi cheerfully rebutted.
"Besides, it's fun checking out the local fish market - you never know what you'll find for dinner," Ukyo chuckled.
"Well, you ladies certainly picked the right place to look! The Loguetown fish market is the best in the East Blue!"
The three girls turned as one to the strange voice that had spoken up from behind them, and found themselves confronted by a fish stall merchant, operating from under a flag bearing the kanji "The Fisherman King Uotome". He was a tall, solidly build fellow, glad in a pinstriped yellow shirt and a black apron. He seemed friendly enough, though there was a strangely unsettling edge to his wide, toothy grin and glassy, almost doll-like eyes.
"Oh, really? Do tell," Ukyo asked him, old instincts as a beach-haunting restauranteer rising to the fore.
"Yeah, Loguetown's famous throughout the East Blue for the quality and variety of its seafood! Chefs come from all over the East Blue to get ingredients here - if you'd been here a week earlier, you would have seen the annual Chef's Competition, which we hold each year!" the merchant explained.
"What rotten luck on our parts - tell me, good sir, what's the secret?" Kodachi interjected, her curiosity as a self-proclaimed gourmet chef aroused.
"Like I was saying, variety! Loguetown's got access to fish you can't find anywhere else in the East Blue. Why, take these fellows for example..."
The man gestured towards one tray on his stall, filled with a very strange-looking fish. A dark green color, covered with purple stripes and spots, they were ugly-looking things, looking more like anglerfish than anything else.
"What's so odd about these fish?" Ukyo asked, stepping closer to take a closer look.
"These fish are what we call migrant fish! Normally, you can only get these babies in the West Blue - the waters around Loguetown are the only place in the East Blue where they're found. And these are just one of the species you can find here - we had a Bluefin Elephant Tuna as the prize in the annual Chef's Competition, and that's normally only found in the South Blue."
"I see - no wonder this island is so prized by chefs and restaurants!" Ukyo marveled.
The merchant laughed. "Yeah, the currents coming from around Reverse Mountain give us an unmatched variety - it's the closest you'll ever get to fishing the All Blue!"
"All Blue?" the three girls chorused, intrigued despite themselves.
"An old fishermen and cooks' legend; a single sea where you can catch fish from all four Blues together. Some say it lies somewhere in the Grand Line, but most think it's just a fairytale," he explained.
"A fascinating story - thank you for sharing it with us," Kodachi politely responded.
"Any time! Of course, if you'd like to thank me by buying something..."
Kodachi laughed, and everyone in earshot winced. "But of course, it's only fair! Ukyo, you're our resident expert in seafood...Ukyo? What's the matter?"
The okonomiyaki chef turned ship's cook started, then blushed as she realized she'd been caught staring. "I'm sorry, Mister, but I was just wondering why you were wearing a fin on your head..."
Kodachi and Nabiki blinked, then turned towards the merchant, where they realized Ukyo was right; a blue spiny fish's fin was perched behind the merchant's close-shaven skull, like a very bizarre hair ornament.
The merchant's smile grew a little brittle, but he forced out a laugh. "Oh, that! It's a little legacy of my great-grandmother's."
"Your great-grandmother wore a fin on her head?" Nabiki responded.
"No, she was a fishman, making me part fishman," the merchant explained patiently.
Three teenagers stared at him in obvious shock.
"Fish...man? That's a thing?" a visibly dumbfounded Nabiki finally said what they were all thinking.
"You've never heard of fishmen?" the merchant asked, visibly confused by their response.
"We're from a... very isolated part of the East Blue," Kodachi explained.
"Must be... a lot of people don't like fishmen, but I've never heard of anyone not knowing about them before," the merchant mused. "They're basically a race of amphibious people who combine humans with various kinds of fish."
"Like merfolk?" Nabiki asked.
"They're related, in fact, but fishmen always have human-style legs," the merchant replied. "They can be found all over, but their homeland lies deep inside the Grand Line."
"Thank you for explaining that! I'm sorry for staring at you... let us make it up to you! What would you recommend from today's catch?" Ukyo asked.
The merchant's grin grew wider and warmer, and he quickly launched into his sales pitch.
Off with Ryoga and Umok...
"So, there's one thing I want to know, Ryoga," Umok commented as they wandered through Loguetown's streets.
"What's that?"
"Why doesn't your fighting style have a name?"
Ryoga stopped, looking up at the imp in confusion. "...Why do you wanna know?"
Umok shrugged. "Just curious. Ranma and Nabiki have their Anything Goes, Shampoo has her Chinese Amazon Wu Shu, Ukyo has her Kuonji School of Martial Arts Okonomiyaki, Kodachi has - or had, so she says - Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics... and then there's you, who never uses a name."
"Well...uh... I don't really have one. I don't really practice a single style so much as an amalgam of tricks and techniques I've picked up over the years," Ryoga confessed.
"So... Hibiki School of Anything Goes, then?" Umok commented.
Ryoga shuddered in palpable disgust. "Never, ever call it that again!"
"What about... Vagabond Martial Arts?"
"Okay, that's a little better," Ryoga conceded.
Back with Ranma and Shampoo...
"So... let's recap," Ranma conversationally began, taking note of his surroundings... specifically, the myriad craters and trenches now littering the stoney beach.
"Your speed definitely goes up in hybrid form. You're faster than Ryoga... you're almost as fast as me! You accelerate like crazy, and in a straight line, you move like lightning... but you really need to work on your turns, because right now, your control stinks," he declared.
"Shampoo notice," the cabbit-girl moaned, currently on her back in the middle of the largest trench, where she'd skidded after trying and failing to pull off a sharp turn. She grunted and pulled herself upright, stones clattering as they fell from where they'd settled on her during her tumble.
"Next thing we should test ought to be your strength... shift back to demibeast, then punch that cliff, hard as you can," Ranma instructed her.
It was an instruction no normal martial arts tutor would have given... but neither of them were normal. Shampoo grinned a feral grin as she padded over to the nearest cliff, a solid wall of weather-beaten rock. Shifting back to her nearly human form, she took a moment to center herself, and then struck the stone with a full-bodied punch.
The thunderous cacophony of rock shattering and splitting filled the air, the force of Shampoo's blow manifesting itself as a visible crater in the rock, at least three inches deep, as tall as the Chinese Amazon, and nearly twice as wide. Smirking at the fruit of her labor, Shampoo turned to Ranma.
"How that, airen? This look like Shampoo normal strike."
"Very good! Now, try kicking it," Ranma responded.
"Kicking?"
"A rabbit's strongest limbs are its legs, so, logically, that should also apply to a rabbit zoan, right?"
"Huh. Airen make good point. Okay, Shampoo do!"
Once more, the Chinese Amazon centered herself, steeling her body for the impossible task she was about to demand of it. Then, with a proud kiai, she drew up her right leg and launched it heel-first into the stone.
The impact audibly exploded, flooding the air with dust and momentarily drowning out everything with the sound of shattering stone and groaning rock. When the air cleared, Shampoo and Ranma found themselves staring at a new crater, easily a foot deep and the better part of a storey high, wide enough that the two of them could have walked into it shoulder to shoulder and still not touch the side.
"Sh-Shampoo do that?!" a dumbfounded cabbit-girl demanded.
"Awesome! That looks like something Ryoga would do!" Ranma cheered. "Try your hybrid form, now! Punch first, then kick!"
Grinning with feral anticipation, Shampoo shifted forms again, the change barely noticeable, before hopping over to a fresh cliff-face. Her fist slammed into it with savage speed, splintering stone and creating a crater as large as the last one she she reared back and drove one foot squarely into the center of the just-formed crater with all her might.
The sound was indescribable, the earth itself screaming in pain as the sheer force pulverized stone and sent great cracks and fissures ripping through the face of the cliff, spider-webbing upwards and filling the air with ominous earthen groans.
"Shampoo!" Ranma cried as the whole cliff-face suddenly gave way, collapsing in on itself and raining boulders the size of small cars down.
He was preparing to leap into the landslide in an instinctive effort to save her, when suddenly Shampoo came flying out of the swirling dust, catching him by the waist and carrying him out of the way as a boulder landed right where Ranma had been standing.
They hit the scree and rolled, only stopping when they slid into a pre-existing boulder, leaving them panting for breath and instinctively clutching each other for support, their gazes mutually locked on the pile of giant boulders lying where Shampoo had been practicing as the landslide gave way.
"...Shampoo not know her own strength..." she marveled, her voice barely a whisper.
"Okay, that stuff about hybrid form being stronger... checks out," Ranma muttered, barely louder than she was. "Definitely gotta work on focusing that strength, though..."
Meanwhile, with the other girls...
"Okay, that's the grocery shopping done; where do you ladies want to go next?" Nabiki asked cheerfully.
"Well, I do believe that shop over there is a fashion boutique, and I would dearly enjoy seeing what this world has to offer in high design," Kodachi replied with a grin, gesturing to a building emblazoned with the legend 'Robecca Hanberg'.
"Ooh, I like the way you think!" Nabiki giggled.
"I don't know... we made a fair chunk of money with the piracy thing, but we're not that rich... shouldn't we get our clothes from someplace with cheap, functional gear?" Ukyo hesitantly pointed out.
"Oh, relax, Ukyo! Nothing wrong with doing a little window shopping!" Nabiki chided her.
"And besides, that's how pirates work! We risk our lives to amass booty, and then we spend it all in a glorious whirlwind of hedonism and vice, emptying our pockets to send us forth on a fresh rampage of looting and pillaging!" Kodachi cackled gleefully, eliciting concerned looks from her companions.
Nabiki was the first to shake that off, turning an enticing smile on the last of their trio. "Oh, come on, Ukyo, don't be a party pooper... besides, maybe we'll find you something nice enough to catch a certain handsome captain's eye, hmm?"
Ukyo blushed red as a beet. "I'm not, he's not, we're not..."
Kodachi laughed, not unkindly, before taking Ukyo by the shoulder and gently pulling her along. "Come on, dear, we have the day to ourselves, so let's enjoy it... every girl deserves a good shopping spree, even girls with your questionable taste in fashion."
Whilst Ukyo grumbled in protest, she didn't fight back, and allowed herself to be led into the shop.
Once inside, two pairs of eyes lit up in delight, whilst a third took on a look of begrudging interest.
"Wow, look at these clothes..." Nabiki sighed rapturously.
"Oh, I'm looking, I'm looking! Eeee!"
Nabiki and Ukyo flinched as one as Kodachi suddenly let out an ear-piercing shrill of delight, rocketing away from them and practically tearing one long, elegant-looking dress from its stand.
"My ears! What's wrong with you?!" Ukyo demanded.
"Silk! It's actual, honest-to-goodness silk!" Kodachi squeed in delight, hugging the garment to her chest.
"Are you serious?!" Nabiki blurted, almost sprinting over in her eagerness to get a closer look.
"I know silk, and this is definitely silk!" Kodachi assured her, giving the dress another exultant hug.
Ukyo watched the two girls excitedly slip into a patois that she herself had never developed, excitedly snatching up assorted dresses, feeling a familiar mixture of exasperation and envy bubbling up from inside of her. A decade spent pretending to be a guy had cut her off from this fundamental (or at least stereotypical) female activity, and despite her newfound resolve to more openly display her gender in hopes of winning Ranma's approval, that didn't mean she'd magically gained a real fashion sense overnight.
"Ukyo, I think this one would look good on you."
"Huh?!" Ukyo blinked in shock as Nabiki swept up to her, holding up a dress to the former crossdresser's neckline and eying her intently.
"Ohh, let's try this one; I think it's just her color!" Kodachi interjected excitedly, grabbing Ukyo by the wrist and trying to drag her over towards the changing room
"Hey, wait a minute!" Ukyo protested, tugging against the noblewoman's grasp. 'Since when is she so strong?!'
"This is fun! I've never had a little sister to dress up before!" Kodachi continued.
"Trust me, it's a lot of fun! I used to do this with Akane, back when she was younger," Nabiki noted, strangely wistful as she did so.
"Don't I get some say in this?!"
"Oh hush, Ukyo, you'll thank us for this when we're done," Kodachi declared.
Meanwhile...
"Captain Chaser!"
The drumming sound of running footsteps echoed through the halls of Loguetown's Marine Headquarters.
"Captain Chaser!"
The marine flung open the door to his superior officer's quarters, then hung in the door, panting for air.
"What is it, Marine?" came the surly growl from the figure seated behind the captain's desk.
"S-sir! Reports from the docks - we've had pirates land at Loguetown!"
"Of course we've had pirates land here, you idiot; this is the last stop before reaching Reverse Mountain! What have they done so far?" the captain snarled.
"Um... nothing, sir."
"What do you mean, 'nothing'?"
"They've docked, and seem to have gone their separate ways. The largest group of them seem to be engaged in shopping..."
"...Shopping," the captain flatly repeated. "Have they done anything actually criminal yet?"
"Uh... no, sir," the marine sheepishly reported.
"What about their flag - do we know who they are?"
"It doesn't match any flags associated with any crews currently on the bounty registry," the marine admitted.
"Then ignore them! We don't have the manpower to spend on hunting little fish who aren't making a nuisance of themselves, we have more important things to do - we're to escort the Buggy Pirates to the transport ship for Impel Down at noon, and there's rumors there may be an attack! So I don't want to hear about some nameless nobodies who happen to be flying a Jolly Roger, got it?!"
"Y-yes sir! Right away sir!" the marine whimpered. He snapped a quick salute, and then scrambled away as fast as he could.
Behind him, the replacement commander of Loguetown sighed in exasperation. "Damn HQ, why am I stuck here with these incompetents... that idiot Smoker should be taking care of this place!"
The faint tinkle of candy-on-glass echoed through the room as Captain Chaser took a lollipop from the overflowing bowl on the desk and began sucking it with aggrieved gusto.
Back with Ryoga...
The Eternally Lost Boy stared at the biggest, weirdest-looking snail he'd ever seen. The snail stared back, placidly looking into the depths of his soul. Slowly, Ryoga broke the staring contest to look up at the headset-wearing merchant. "So... these snails send messages? Seriously?"
"Of course! Transponder snails are the foundation of all long-range audio and visual communication! Much faster than sending letters or couriers," the merchant chuckled.
"Truly wondrous are the ways of the multiverse," Umok commented from where he was lazily sweeping back and forth across the shelves, taking in the wide variety of snoozing snails and mechanical devices clearly meant to be fitted onto said snails.
"Indeed they are! So, good sir, are you interested in purchasing...?"
Ryoga looked at the snail again, which stared placidly back.
'Sheesh, I'm glad it at least doesn't try to act like a puppy or a kitten at a pet shop, that'd make this worse...'
Slowly, Ryoga shook his head. "I'm sorry, but no. We don't really need transponder snails on a small ship like ours."
"Such a pity... but if you change your mind, Samson's Transponder Snail Shack is the best place in Loguetown for all your snail-related needs!"
And back to the girls...
"Looking good, Ukyo!" Nabiki cheered, actually giggling softly as she did so.
"I believe the saying goes something like, 'shake it, baby'!" Kodachi cackled.
"Cut it out, ya jerks!" Ukyo roared, blushing beet red. Despite her embarrassment, she had to admit, the outfit they had forced her into did look good... even if it was way skimpier than anything she'd have ever worn back in Nerima!
"Well, I think it looks exquisite, young madam!" the clerk attending to them enthused, which Ukyo had to admit was flattering... even if it was coming from a guy whose hairstyle made him look like he had a clothes hanger wedged into his head.
"You heard the man, Ukyo! So, what do you say? You want this outfit?" Nabiki asked.
Ukyo gnawed on her lip, cheeks flushing, before finally nodding shyly.
"Fantastic! And I suppose you ladies will be purchasing all of these?" the clerk asked hopefully, gesturing to the sizable pile of clothing that had been built up on his desk.
"Oh, no, we were just trying those on for fun," Nabiki replied casually.
The clerk's face fell like a ten-ton weight dropped from a balcony.
"Of course you were," he dryly responded.
'This is just like that mess with that redhaired beauty a week ago...'
"Oh, but we will be purchasing these two dresses as well as the one our companion is wearing," Kodachi interjected diplomatically, indicating two garments slung over the crook of her arm.
'Well, I suppose that's at least one step up...' the clerk mused. With the aid of long practice, he schooled his expression into a winning smile. "But of course, madam! Just give me a moment and I, Cintre Hanger, will have it all sorted out for you!"
As for Ranma and Shampoo...
Shampoo grunted as she hit the ground hard enough to send pebbles flying, the impact fashioning a crater deep enough to bury her in. She lay there amidst the stone and sand, trying to force her head to stop spinning.
"Not bad, Shampoo, you're getting better! Whaddya say, eight out fifteen?"
Blearily, the Chinese Amazon blinked her eyes and stared up at her husband (if he'd only accept that title), who was currently perched on a particularly tall, pointy boulder and grinning down at her. Despite everything, Shampoo felt a flicker of resentment curl through her heart.
'How is one youth from Japan such a prodigy?! I am the product of nearly three thousand years of breeding and training, and he makes me look like a child playing at being a warrior! And he does not even seem to notice!'
She inhaled deeply, and then exhaled slowly, letting the bitterness leave her body with her breath.
'Enough, Xian Pu. To stew in bitterness is beneath you. Focus on what is important. Your husband is willing to help you improve - he actually praised you for your dedication! He would never say such things to Akane Tendo! You may not have won the battle of the fist, but you are winning the war for the heart of the man you love...'
Smiling softly, the Chinese Amazon gingerly shook her head. "No, Shampoo think she hit her limit for today. Airen too-too good in mid-air."
"Hey, it's the Saotome School's speciality," Ranma chuckled. "But, seriously, you're getting better - and not just because of those Zoan powers of yours, either. Good job."
Shampoo purred unconsciously, a soft warmth filling her up from the inside at the sincere praise in Ranma's voice. "Thank you, airen... Shampoo so glad we get to do this."
Which was when Shampoo's stomach audibly groaned in hunger, a faint blush slowly creeping onto the cabbit-girl's face.
"Ah-heh... maybe we go eat now?" she meekly suggested.
Ranma's stomach promptly growled in response, even louder than Shampoo's, and he had the courtesy to look embarrassed too. "Eh-heh... well, we've been at it pretty hard this morning... I think a nice lunch is in order."
He hopped nimbly down from his rocky perch, then extended his hand to Shampoo, hoisting her to her feet and starting back in the direction of Loguetown proper in what for anyone else would have been a full-blown jog, but for the two of them was little more than a brisk walk.
As they went, Ranma found himself feeling oddly introspective...
'...S'weird. I never realized this before, but Shampoo's actually kind of fun to train with. Man, sparring with her is way different to sparring with Akane! She never got mad once, even though I kept beating her - an' she kept trying despite losing each time, too! Those Zoan powers are weird, but on the other hand, they also make things a lot more of a challenge... maybe we should spar again in the future..?
Back with Ryoga...
"So why don't you use this Shishi Hokodan technique more often, if it's as powerful as you say?" Umok asked, in between licking at his triple-scoop ice cream cone.
"Well, it's kind of unreliable," Ryoga confessed, taking a bite from his own sweet treat. "The move is fueled by the heavy ki generated by despair and misery, so you can't use it unless you're in the right mind set, and it's really hard for it not to get worse the better you're actually doing in the fight."
"Huh... essentially, a cross between a gimmick technique and a situationally useful one. I've seen spells like that before," the imp noted.
"That's actually something that's been bugging me... you keep going on about being magic, but exactly how? Beyond the floating thing," Ryoga conceded, gesturing vaguely in Umok's direction.
Umok paused, staring at Ryoga out of the side of two of his eyes, clearly contemplating his response. Finally, he shrugged and replied, "I levitate because that's how my people get around. As for magic... well, if I were in my prime, I'd be what's called a dimensionalist. We're a sub-specialist of the more common conjurer, focused on spatial manipulation - teleportation, portals, warping space, things like that. Makes sense?"
"That's a thing?" Ryoga asked, genuinely interested.
Umok nodded, tracing strange sigils in the air with his ice cream cone, stray droplets of melted cream raining onto the ground below. "It's rather an esoteric field, and not as combat focused as some, but it's powerful enough if you're creative with it. I've amassed a wide understanding of basic magical theory and more than a few general spells along my way, but dimensionalism is my bread and butter, so to speak."
"Hm... you say you can warp space? What's that actually do?" Ryoga asked, somewhat distracted. There was something promising in the imp's words.
Umok took a large bite of his treat, swallowed, and replied, "Well, it's complicated! The simplest explanation is that I can make things bigger inside than they are outside, or I can make directions stop working the way they should."
"Really!? Well, maybe you can help me... I've always had this... little problem with directions..."
Back to the girls once again...
"Do you really think we should be looking at jewelry?" Ukyo hesitantly asked.
"Oh, Ukyo, live it up! Haven't you always wanted to dress up with something shiny and sparkly?" Nabiki chided her, even as she speculatively held up a pearl necklace to Ukyo's chin.
"I... uh..."
Loguetown gaol...
The Loguetown gaol was, for obvious reasons, built with two things in mind: capacity, and security. Comfort was the very last thing on its builders' minds. So, whilst it was large enough to house the three dozen or so men (and one extra large lion) who made up the Buggy Pirates, the conditions weren't going to be winning favors any time soon. The cells were dark and dank, and misery practically radiated from the rime-encrusted stones. Chains rattled and clinked in the gloom, and somebody coughed.
"Captain, what'll we do? The marines are shipping us off to Impel Down today," whimpered one of the smaller, weaker-looking pirates; a dark-skinned youth wearing a sleeveless yellow jacket and a striped conical hat, his only concession to the informal circus theme of his crew being diagonal slashes of paint above and below each eye.
"Relax, Baba! Your great Captain Buggy's been in worse situations than this! When I give the signal, we'll make a flashy escape, just you wait and see!" guffawed Buggy from his private cell, which he shared with only Alvida.
Baba visibly relaxed at his captain's words, and his mood spread like a plague through the rest of the crew. A faint, erratic chorus of variations of "I knew Captain Buggy had a plan," and "See, nothing to worry about" filled the cells.
Alvida watched as her unwanted cellmates settled down before surreptitiously nudging Buggy. "So, do you actually have a plan, or is that all a bluff?"
"Of course I have a plan; do I look like an idiot?!" Buggy sneered back. "We just need to wait for the right moment, and that's coming soon... these idiots can't hold Captain Buggy, not when they can't even be bothered to use sea prism stone on you or me!"
Alvida gave him a skeptical look, but kept her mouth shut. It was true that the marines had failed to use their Devil Fruit-nullifying cuffs on her, but even so, if she was going to escape, she was going to need some cover.
'Better to wait and see. Even if this idiot gets things wrong, at least their failure should give me the chance to slip away...'
Suddenly, the sound of marching boots echoing on stone filled the gaol, leaving the pirates deathly quiet as a key slipped into a lock.
"Alright, boys, get ready... we're gonna give these damn marines a show so flashy they'll remember it forever," Captain Buggy vowed, pitching his voice loud enough to carry to his men, but hopefully not so much that the approaching guards would hear...
Soon afterwards, in the town center...
Ranma tentatively took a bite from what he had been assured was a local street food delicacy, which turned out to be a meaty pork sausage skewered on a stick before being rolled in batter and fried in oil. It was unusual, but far from the worst thing he'd eaten in his life, and he happily took a second bite.
Shampoo, in comparison, was showing far less trepidation, the halfbeast zoan crunching gleefully through her third sausage in as many minutes. "Yum! Shampoo need that after morning we have... so, what we do now?"
"Well, I guess we should try and find the others, maybe see about booking a hotel or something," Ranma suggested idly. Then he stopped, ears pricking up as he glanced around inquisitively. "Hey, do you hear something...?"
Shampoo cocked her impressively oversized lapine ear, before looking confused. "Is... marching?"
Their questions were answered momentarily as a procession emerged into the central plaza; both martial artists turned pirates instinctively tensed as they saw almost two dozen marines marching along, and their caution didn't ebb just because they realized the marines were already escorting captives.
"...Clowns?" A confused Shampoo observed.
"I'd say they had something against a circus, but, no, I think they're actually pirates," Ranma replied, staring openly at the garish figures being led along in their chains.
"Shampoo see other girls! They over there!" the cabbit-girl interjected, nudging Rama and pointing at one of the streets.
"Hey, good eye, Shampoo - and there's Ryoga over there! Man, talk about a lucky coincidence!"
Of course, they were noticed right back.
"There's Shampoo - and Ranma's with her. She must have had her fun for the day," Nabiki smirked, pointing for her fellows.
"Ah, there's the others... how'd you know they'd be here?" Ryoga asked his impish companion.
"A lucky break, I must confess," Umok admitted.
The teens (and their imp) would have crossed the intervening distance and left the marines to their business with their prisoners, keeping things quiet and uneventful... but that was when fate intervened against their favor.
A shrill whistling noise filled the air as a series of black spheres came streaking through the sky and bounced across the cobblestones with metallic clanks, before erupting with thunderous bangs and enormous clouds of thick, white smoke. The plaza immediately erupted into chaos, civilians screaming out in fear and scattering in all directions, whilst the startled marines gave cry and almost fell about in similar disarray, being kept at their posts only by the screaming commandments of their superiors.
"Get the bastards!"
"For the honor of Straw Hat Luffy!""
Roaring these unlikely battlecries, a series of thugs and toughs began to stream into the plaza from one of the streets, waving tattered, clearly makeshift flags and charging right at the marine parade. The startled navy soldiers found themselves caught on both sides between the pirates they were escorting and their new assailants, struggling to hold back as they were swarmed and assaulted with all manner of clearly impromptu weapons; lengths of pipe, makeshift clubs, rusty and notched cutlasses, all the weaponry of an angry mob.
And like the mob they resembled, the assailants were clearly indifferent to who was caught in their path. They lashed out at marines, prisoners and civilians with equal enthusiasm, clearly indifferent to such nuances as who their targets were when there were so many of them to attack.
"Where did these idiots come from?!" Alvida demanded.
Buggy simply laughed maniacally. "About time these bastards got here! They just gave us the perfect cover - free yourself, free my men, and let's get out of here!"
"Wait, you knew they were coming?!" Alvida demanded. Even as she spoke, she invoked the powers of her Devil Fruit, pulling against the shackles wrapped around her wrists. Due to their being made of mere metal, they were powerless to stop her from gliding effortlessly out of their steely grasp, and she stepped out of her ankle shackles with the same ease, the Slip-Slip Fruit making it impossible for them to hold her, even though they were technically too small for her to fit her hands and feet through.
"I've kept my ear to the ground! That stupid bastard Straw Hat amassed himself a little fanclub since we clashed, and I knew they were going to try something when we were being moved, which would be the ideal moment to make our escape!" Buggy laughed. His own Devil Fruit couldn't let him simply slip free of his bonds like Alvida had done, so instead he'd launched his fists, still trailing their shackles, like a living bolas, choking one unlucky guard into submission.
"Now grab some keys and free my boys!" Buggy ordered, even as he snatched up the keys from his own victim and freed himself.
"Don't presume to order me, clown," Alvida warned her 'partner'. Even as she said this, she launched herself at the closest guard, snatching him bodily up by the waist and using him like a club to beat down one of the attacking thugs who had gotten too close. Skull met skull with an audible clank, and she hastily looted the keys from the tangled mess of limbs before turning to the closest of Buggy's underlings.
"Ooh, pretty girlies!" chuckled the street thug, a hairy, heavyset man whose face was a tangle of scars and wiry hair. He sneered lecherously, almost slobbering in anticipation as he waved a thick, knotty length of driftwood and stalked towards his hapless prey...
"Oh, did you make the wrong choice today," Nabiki drawled, smirking in anticipation.
Her would-be assailant blinked in confusion, before a distinctive SHING! noise literally split the air... and his trusty club simply fell into two pieces, everything above his wrist dropping to the ground and landing on his foot, drawing a shriek of equal parts pain and shock from the thug.
Kodachi decisively clicked her newly purchased sword back into its sheath. "Hm. Satisfactory. Perhaps that merchant made a fair deal after all."
"Kind of weird that most of his swords looked like katanas, wasn't it?" Nabiki observed idly.
"But fortunate! I trained with the use of the katana, first and foremost, followed by some rapier work; having to adjust to an entirely new sword type would delay my training," the uppercrust pirate responded.
Growling like an animal, their would-be mugger began to lunge forward, intent on beating them into submission with his meaty great fists... only to be intercepted mid-leap by Ukyo, who crushed them mercilessly into the ground with one mighty downward swing of her trusty spatula.
It was a sight that should have made anyone watching think twice about picking a fight... unfortunately, the rest of the gangers proved no smarter than their recently fallen comrade, as those nearby instead bellowed in fury and charged at the three girls.
"Hey, do I look like a marine?!" Ryoga snarled, dodging a chain as it whirled past his head before laying his would-be assailant out-cold with a deft twirl of his umbrella... which he then reversed and used to deflect swords scything towards his seemingly vulnerable side from a pair of marines.
"I'm not with them, either!" he spat, before cracking the white-suited mooks across the skull with his umbrella.
Ranma twisted and skittered through the chaos, dodging strikes and occasionally punching out anyone stupid enough to be too persistent in attacking him.
"Sheesh, what kind of cluster-frak is this?! I haven't been in a brawl like this in years!"
"Stinking pirate scum!"
With the grace of pure instinct, Ranma backflipped over his latest assailant as they tried to attack him from behind, landing neatly on the ground behind them. "Big talk, coming from a marine - Kasumi?!"
"No, Kiyoshi," the attacker replied, looking genuinely confused for a moment... before her expression visibly hardened and she scowled thunderously, "But it's Captain Chaser Kiyoshi to you, pirate!"
Ranma simply stared. Apart from the white-flecked green color to her hair, which brought to mind foaming seas, and the distinctive jacket-based outfit of a higher-ranked Marine (which a small, traitorous part of him was noting she filled out very nicely, despite its not being designed to be sexy), the marine Captain was the spitting image of Kasumi Tendo
She scowled harder, and suddenly shot forward, "Prepare to be punished for your crimes, pirate!"
Caught off-guard by this very un-Kasumi-like behavior, to say nothing of the ghosts of Soun's wrath during that oni incident echoing in his hindbrain, Ranma couldn't even think to defend himself as Kiyoshi's right fist landed on his cheek in a haymaker punch that sent him flying, crashing onto the cobblestones and skidding backwards until he hit a column so hard it cracked. Stars momentarily flashed in front of Ranma's eyes, but he sat up with a groan, staring dumbstruck at his assailant with a hand instinctively pressed to his cheek.
'...Definitely not Kasumi. Damn, that actually hurt!'
Captain Chaser scowled and slipped a pair of iron-bound warfans from holsters on her hips, striking a defensive posture. 'He took one of my best shots, and he doesn't even look phased! Who is this pirate? ...And who's this Kasumi girl? Old girlfriend? She must have been important for me to spook him like this...'
"Airen!" Shampoo shouted in dismay, having seen her beloved husband taken down by a strange green-haired woman. She would have gone to his aid, but there was a little problem with doing that... a tall, muscular youth with jutting fangs and a wild mane of spiky green hair, who twirled a dagger nimbly around his palm so that it spun in a circle, cackling wildly as he did so.
"Get out of Shampoo's way!" the Chinese Amazon zoan snarled, quite literally, her halfbeast vocal cords putting a distinctive bestial cast on her words.
The man blocking her path simply cackled again. "You want to get past me, you're gonna have to go through me!"
"Then Shampoo do!"
Powerful lapine legs coiled like springs, feline toeclaws biting into the stone as if it were butter, before muscles exploded into action, propelling Shampoo forth like a living missile. Her victim literally didn't have time to stop sneering before the cabbit amazon's palm slammed into his face, the momentum of her acceleration channeling through her arm as she thrust forward, turning him into a living missile that shot off backwards in a blur of colors that only stopped when it hit the wall on the opposite side of the street, bringing it down in a cascade of rubble.
In an uncommon turn of events, Ranma found himself on the defensive, dodging and blocking as Kasumi-no-Kiyoshi laid into him, mixing strikes from her cudgel-like fans with powerful kicks. Her attacks were solid enough to actually make Ranma wary of getting hit, and quick enough that avoiding being hit was a legitimate challenge.
"Come on, do we really have to do this? I don't wanna fight you!" Ranma pleaded, dodging a whirling three-strike combo from the marine's warfans.
"You're a pirate, I'm a marine, stupid! This only ends when I clap you in irons with the rest of the scum!" Kiyoshi spat.
'Though I will admit you're making me work for it... Damn, where did you come from? How did HQ not hear of a rookie with this kind of skill taking to the seas?!'
"Shampoo beg to differ!"
In her defense, Kiyoshi immediately twisted to block Shampoo's attack... but she was simply no match for the zoan's kicking strength, which launched her through the air with an indignant shriek, her flight arrested as she plowed into a tangle of marines and thugs.
Shampoo spared a moment to smirk triumphantly in the wake of her fallen adversary before turning back to Ranma. "You okay, Airen?"
"I...yeah. Thanks, Shampoo," Ranma responded. Looking over the chaos, he shook his head. "Okay, this is getting out of hand; time to go!"
Jabbing two fingers in his mouth, he let out an ear-piercing whistle. "Guys, c'mon! Let's get outta here! Back to the ship, double-time!"
As one, he and Shampoo began fighting over to the knot where Nabiki, Ukyo and Kodachi were holding their ground, with Ryoga doing the same. The full might of the Kamikaze Pirates arrayed, they tore through the brawl towards the edge of the plaza, and then took off running as soon as they were clear of the fray.
"So much for a peaceful last day on land!" Ryoga jeered.
"Hey, this wasn't our fault! None of us were responsible here!" Ukyo retorted.
"Less talking, more running!" Nabiki demanded.
As they charged down the streets, it looked like they were going to make a clean getaway... which was when Ranma's intuition suddenly screamed at him.
"Stop!" he roared, digging his heels into the cobblestones to arrest his forward moment, flinging his arms out to force the girls (and Ryoga) to do the same. This proved a wise decision as a rippling blade of air suddenly scythed through the air towards them, forcing the group to spring backwards to avoid being struck. It hit the ground where they had been standing, kicking up dust and debris as it gouged a vicious gash into the weathered stone.
"Not so fast, pirate scum! You aren't getting off that easily!" Kiyoko snarled, still brandishing the open warfan with which she'd fashioned her wind blade.
"...Is that my sister?!" Nabiki blurted, staring bug-eyed at the marine captain confronting them.
"A dimensional doppelganger? Intriguing," Umok muttered, partially to Nabiki, but mostly to himself.
"How you still standing? Shampoo kick you hard!" the zoan protested, stamping her foot and putting a small crater in the ground for emphasis.
"You did what?!" Nabiki barked indignantly, sisterly instinct overwhelming her mouth.
"I'm a marine captain! I'm made of sterner stuff!" Kiyoshi boasted.
'...I hope they buy this. Damn, my ribs... she nearly broke them - without my armor, I think she would have!'
"You're going to pay for helping to free the Buggy Pirates, if it's the last thing I do!" she added.
"Hey, we didn't have nothing to do with that, we're just bystanders!" Ranma protested.
"Like I'm going to believe a word that comes out of a pirate's mouth!" Kiyoshi spat. Her hands flashed into motion, unbuttoning her captain's jacket before she deftly slipped her arms out of her sleeves and then boldly shouldered the jacket off.
The weighted garment, reinforced with thick, heavy plates of steel, audibly clanked as it dropped to the ground, before Kiyoshi snapped her warfans open and struck a combat pose. "Get ready to get serious!"
"What the hell are you wearing, Kasumi?!"
Nabiki's horrified shriek wasn't entirely unjustified. Underneath the formal jacket of a marine captain lay what was best described as a bra with delusions of grandeur; a single swath of fabric that looped around her neck and was tucked into her tight pants, just wide enough to cover the most important parts of her breasts whilst leaving the rest of her utterly exposed... in practice, the marine captain was as close to topless as it was possible to get whilst still not technically being topless.
"I must say, Miss Tendo, I had no idea you were so bold," a dumbstruck Kodachi observed.
Ryoga's nose erupted, streams of crimson spewing from each nostril before he collapsed right there on the spot.
Ranma groaned and pinched his temples with forefinger and thumb. "Really, pig-boy? You pick now to remember your thing about women's bodies?"
"...Is she bigger than Shampoo?" the cabbit zoan asked, nervously checking her own bust-line with hands and eyes.
"...Aren't you cold in that getup?" Ukyo asked, staring with wide eyes at their attacker.
By this point, Kiyoshi was trembling with fury. "My name... is Kiyoshi!"
Snarling with rage, she shot forward like a human missile, moving faster than the eye could possibly follow as she rocketed towards Ranma...
Who caught her punch in mid-swing, the impact of flesh on flesh powerful enough to create a burst of wind that ruffled their respective clothes.
"Not bad! But I didn't just start playing this game!" Ranma jeered, snatching the startled Kiyoshi up by the waist before bodily throwing her into the air back the way they came.
Kiyoshi twisted in mid-air, turning her uncontrolled flight into a deliberate spin as she spiralled back to the ground, landing deftly on her feet and immediately adopting a fighting pose.
"Who are you?! Why are you here?!" she demanded.
"I'm Captain Ranma Saotome, of the Kamikaze Pirates! And we're here to get to the Grand Line, so why don't you be a good girl and get out of our way, huh? I really don't want to hurt you!"
"Arrogant pig!" Kiyoshi spat, hurtling forward again. She swung and stabbed with her fans, interspersing these with kicks and even the occasional punch, only to find herself being held back as her opponent dodged, blocked and parried every move.
"Why won't you fight back?!" she snarled.
"I already told you, I don't wanna hurt ya!"
"I'm not giving you the choice!" Kiyoshi spat.
"Then allow me to intervene! Black Rose Bomb!"
Ranma's eyes went wide in shock, and he sprang backwards away from Kiyoshi, who failed to react as something slammed against the back of her skull and then exploded, filling the air around her with a thick, choking cloud of purple smoke.
Kiyoshi coughed and spluttered, trying desperately to wave the fumes from her face with her fans, only to find her limbs sluggish and unresponsive. "Dirty - gak - rotten - pft - cheats! What...did you do... to... me...?"
She wavered, tottered, and finally fell limply to the ground, twitching but unable to move.
Kodachi strutted forward, purposefully putting herself in Kiyoshi's vision before shrieking with laughter. "The last batch of my patented paralysis powder! That should keep you out of our way for a while! Next time, I suggest you listen to my captain, dear; it will mean far less humiliation for you!"
"Y-you insolent... hey, come back here! You can't do this!" Kiyoshi snarled and spat, but to no avail. Her body refused to obey her commands, and she could do nothing but lay there limply and watch as the pirates quickly retreated, with their zoan member almost literally stepping over her as she hopped past with the unconscious pervert on her shoulder.
"You can't do this to me! I'll get you for this! If it's the last thing I do, I'll get even with you!" she screamed, her voice echoing off the cobblestones.
They didn't even bother glancing back at her.
Chapter End & Closing Notes
...Well, I'm sure THAT'S not going to come back to bite our heroes in some way, shape or form...
We finally got to see Shampoo strut her stuff as a newly fledged zoan, and I hope the boost isn't too much for folks to swallow. She does still have room to grow and improve, though, especially if she wants to reach the pinnacle that is Awakening her Devil Fruit.
And finally, the East Blue saga is over; with our next chapter, we will reach Reverse Mountain and enter the Grand Line, beginning our journey at long last! Hope you're excited to see what's to come!
An addendum for the curious; "Baba" is the unnamed...uh... "dusky skinned" member of Buggy's original crew. Since he's unnamed in canon, I chose to give him the name of the similarly colored pirate from the Asterix comics of my youth.