Voyages of the Wild Sea Horse Chapter 22, a Ranma + One Piece Crossover fanfic

Authors Notes: Not gonna lie, I'm a little disappointed with the review turnout for the last chapter. It's a topic I really need help with, either here in the comments or in the thread on SpaceBattles. Thanks to those who did weigh in on their opinions, though!

Doraemax: Despite the fanon, Ranma really has no problems with power ups, and certainly not with them for himself. Literally the start of his issue with Akane in the Battle Dogi is that he's jealous it picked her over him.

AthanMortis: Dyna is a character completely of my own invention, and has been waiting to get into the crew for around two years now. It's purely coincidence that by the time she did so, the canon manga introduced Egghead Island, much like with Nabiki's coming fate and the debut of Stussy.

Chapter 22: Teeny, Tiny Tales of Training

It was a gray and dreary day when the Stormbringer reached its next stop along the Grand Line. The sky was thick with clouds, the rain sheeting down and stirring curling whisps of fog from the dark sea below. The Stormbringer sailed stubbornly along, its crew either hiding from the inclement weather inside or stoically doing their duties through the thick drizzle.

"Civilization ahead!" came the booming voice of Umok, audible even through the susurrus of rain streaming into water.

"You're sure of that? Can you even see anything in this mess?" Ranma called up to him, soaked clothes plastered to her skin and leaving nothing to the imagination.

"My eyes are sharper than yours, human. There's an island dead ahead, and quite heavily populated too," came the reply.

Ranma leaned over the gunwale and peered through the rain, shielding her eyes with a hand and squinting. Sure enough, with a bit of focus, she could make out an island looming through the mist and the rain, and even the small shapes of ships docked en masse in an upcoming port.

Satisfied, Ranma straightened up, squared her shoulders, and bellowed at the top of her lungs, "Drop anchor and get in the galley! We're having a crew meeting, and that means everyone! ...You too, Umok!"

The few crew aboard the deck all looked at Ranma with visible surprise; it was rare that he (or she, at the moment) made such a formal, authoritative statement. But they quickly shook it off and bustled into activity, tacking up the sails and dropping the anchor to be sure that their ship would sail no further as they held council.

Minutes later...

Ignoring the feeling of the last of the hot water dripping down his skin, Ranma placed his hands on the table and looked solemnly around his crew. Kodachi, Shampoo and Ukyo looked back at him attentively, whilst Ryoga was slumped in his chair, deliberately trying to look like he wasn't paying attention, even though it was obvious that he was, and Nabiki was relaxing in her own chair. Harumi was watching Ranma with wide-eyed enthusiasm, shadowed by the bulk of Miriam, who was also politely paying attention. Umok floated over the table, idly spinning an apple on one fingertip, whilst the mechanical form of Dyna sat at a corner of the table, the only signs that she was active and aware the soft glow of her solitary eye and the faint whisps of steam curling from her vent-pipes.

"Okay, guys; as you know, the next island is up ahead, and from what I saw, it looks like a pretty decently sized town on it... which is why I'm thinking this might be a good island for us to take our training break on," Ranma announced.

Murmurs of surprise and perhaps a hint of confusion chorused from around the table as the Kamikaze Pirates looked first at each other, and then back at Ranma.

"What are you - oh, yeah, now I remember. You said you thought we should take a month or so off from sailing and focus on our training, back before we entered the Dead End Race," Ryoga noted, scratching his chin thoughtfully.

"Gotta say, I'm surprised you'd suggest we hit up a place like this. I thought you martial arts types were all about high mountains and deep forests when you wanted to get serious," Nabiki observed, raising her arms over head and interlocking her fingers as she stretched.

"Normally, yeah," Ranma conceded. "But given the chance, it's good to have access to hospitals in case something goes wrong, especially if we're trying for high level training like we intend to."

"Airen is right. Martial artist what get compound fracture whilst alone in high mountains is risking own life," Shampoo interjected, nodding sagely as she did so.

"I must confess, a prolonged furlough on dry land sounds quite appealing to me. It would make a nice change of pace from the humdrum of shipboard life, even in the Grand Line," Kodachi commented.

"Not to mention we got all that cash stockpiled now; we can use that to replenish our supplies, upgrade our gear, maybe even make some improvements to the ship," Ukyo added excitedly.

"What's wrong with the ship?" Miriam asked, a slightly hurt look on her face.

"I don't mean anything physical! I mean more... quality of life stuff! Y'know, more entertainment for when things are going slow," Ukyo hastily assured her.

"We could expand the ship's library - perhaps even get some magazine or pulpie subscriptions," Harumi observed diplomatically.

"Speaking of libraries, if this settlement is advanced enough, its own library may be worth consulting," Dyna interjected, the first time the steam-powered gynoid had spoken since they had assembled.

"What for?" Ryoga asked, inadvertently cutting off Ranma.

"Navigation, potential treasures or other targets to pursue, legends, information regarding the One Piece, information regarding a way to the Sky-Sea..." Dyna listed simply.

"Good point, Dyna. Maybe we can even get some guns for that arm of yours," Ranma suggested, nodding as he did so.

"That would be optimal," came the dry response.

"Not to mention your girlfriends would probably like the chance to go on a date, eh, Ranma?" Ryoga added, the smirk on his face belying the conversational tone that he used.

Ranma let out a choked sound, whilst Shampoo, Kodachi and Ukyo all visibly perked up with interest at that suggestion, and even Nabiki smirked in Ranma's general direction. Miriam and Harumi tried to exchange quick appreciative glances at each other without being noticed; they failed, but nobody said anything about it.

Coughing unnecessarily, Ranma turned his attention to Umok, who was lazily peeling a banana he had taken from the table. "So, yeah; what do you think, Umok?"

"Huh? Me?!" the imp asked, all three eyes going wide in confusion.

"Well, you're the reason we're on this quest for the One Piece in the first place," Ranma reminded him, trying not to flinch at the visible curiosity from their locally-recruited crewmates. Well, Miriam and Harumi, at least; Dyna was hard to read with that perpetual poker face of hers. The missing eye didn't help either.

"I have no timeline I need to follow. Makes no difference to me how long it takes. And you and Ryoga were right; you all need to get stronger if we're going to survive the dangers of this sea. This seems like a perfect opportunity to focus on self improvement to me," Umok announced, shrugging his shoulders as he did. He then began to eat the banana.

Ranma nodded to himself, then looked back at his crew proper. "Alright, well, in that case; this is gonna be home for the next month or so. Remember; this ain't a vacation! We're going to be training our butts off too while we're here!"

A chorus of agreement met his words, and Ranma permitted himself a smile.

'Huh... I think this captain thing is getting easier. Now, where do we go from here...?'

When the rain lifted, the Stormbringer sailed on into the port city of Shelzar, a thriving metropolis on Ghelspad Island, ready to begin its month-long furlough from sailing. It was to be the start of many small tales that the Kamikaze Pirates would carry with them when they left...

Bounty Time

"Coo! Coo! Coo!"

The Kamikaze Pirates looked up from their collective early morning activities, preparing themselves to disembark from the Stormbringer for another day's training in the hills and forests surrounding Shelzar, as a large bird wearing a distinctive hat and carrying a bag full of rolled up newspapers circled the deck, crying out.

"Hey, a News Coo! Down here, buddy! We'll take one!" Ranma called out, waving a hand in an effort to attract the avian courier's attention.

Cooing loudly, the bird descended in a fluster of wing flaps down to the deck, perching patiently in front of Ranma. The young martial artist turned pirate captain quickly dug into his wallet and pulled out the money, with the News Coo trading him for a copy of the World Economy Paper before taking flight once more.

"Anything interesting, Ranchan?" Ukyo asked, even as she and the rest of the crew began crowding towards Ranma, who was already flipping the paper open.

"Lemme see... stock prices... trade disputes... weddings, births and funerals... ah, here's something good - new bounties!" Ranma announced cheerfully.

"Ooh, we've been waiting for those, Ranma darling! Did our little raid on Sukumvit's party have the desired effect?" Kodachi asked eagerly, giggling in glee as she did so.

Ranma flicked through the wanted posters, then grinned proudly.

"I'll say! They're really taking notice of us now, guys - look at this!"

He snatched up his newly reissued bounty and proudly flaunted it to his audience.

Nabiki whistled appreciatively. "Ninety-five million? Nice, Saotome!"

"Airen gain eighty million increase just for raiding silly little party? We no even get to rob place!" Shampoo interjected incredulously.

"It's probably more because he beat Gasparde in that Dead End Race; Gasparde had a bounty of ninety-five million, and pirates who beat more highly ranked pirates usually get their bounty marked to be closer to the guy they beat," Miriam commented, leaning over to get a better look at the bounty.

"Either way, congratulations, captain! You're getting close to that elusive hundred million mark," Harumi cheerfully quipped.

Ranma smiled even brighter at that, which elicited a scornful scoff and a pair of folded arms from Ryoga. "You're actually proud of that, Ranma? I think you've gone crazy."

"Oh? Well, in that case, I suppose you don't wanna see your new bounty, Ryoga," Ranma smirked, tucking his bounty poster back into the middle of the paper.

"What?!" Ryoga barked in shock.

"Oooh, let us see!" Nabiki chirped eagerly, smirking in slightly sadistic delight.

"Feast your eyes!" Ranma crowed, grinning smugly as he whipped out the wanted poster and held it up for the rest of the crew to see.

Who promptly fell about laughing at the sight of a blushing-cheeked, clearly topless Ryoga splashed across the upper half of the poster, the lower half given over to the usual "Wanted dead or alive'' instruction and the twenty million Berie bounty. Even Umok was bobbing up and down, pounding a fist against thin air as if it were an invisible floor and laughing his scarf-and-hat-veiled head off.

Ryoga was red as a beet at this point, and looks could kill, the poster and the boy holding it would have been ashes smeared across the Stormbringer's deck. Especially as Ryoga reached out to rip it from Ranma's hand, only for Ranma to nimbly hop back out of his reach. Ryoga roared in fury and began to chase after Ranma, who mockingly ran away from him backwards, leading the irate first mate away and leaving the rest of the paper behind.

Kodachi wiped a tear from her eye and, still smirking, asked, "What about the rest of us? Did any of us get bounties?"

Nabiki stepped forward and picked up the paper, flicking through it. "Hmm... looks like only Shampoo got a bounty after Ranma and Ryoga... wow, she did better than Ryoga, though - thirty five million!"

The Chinese Amazon turned Zoan puffed out her chest and preened proudly, polishing her claws on her shirt before making a show of examining them nonchalantly.

"Hiryu Shoten Ha!"

And then the Kamikaze Pirates had to busy themselves with avoiding being swept up in the tornado Ranma had used to launch the overheated Ryoga into the sea to cool off.

All That Glitters

The gold merchant's long, thin fingers lifted themselves to the thick glasses, eerily reminiscent of Mousse's, and adjusted them, magnifying his eyes as he stared at what the two young women had laid out on his desk.

"Hmm... remarkably pure... but these shapes... I've never seen gold worked in this fashion before," he muttered.

"It's from a one-of-a-kind source," stated the older and taller of the two women.

"Shards from the egg of a giant turtle," added the younger, tossing her ponytail proudly.

"The eggs of Shimagame?! But those are only legend!" He protested, snapping his intense scrutiny from the golden plates with their jagged edges to the young women.

"And yet, here they are before you... I trust that will be taken into account for our evaluation...?" Purred the elder, not even flinching under his gaze.

"Mm...yes," muttered the trader, delicately removing his glasses and buffing them with a silken cloth pulled daintily from his front pocket.

"Given the unusual purity and density of the gold in question, I believe a small increase of perhaps... three percent? Would be fair?"

"You just said that the eggs of Shimagame are legendary!" the ponytailed young maiden protested.

"But you have no proof that they are of such legendary provender; there is hardly a maker's mark to be found on them," he calmly yet firmly reminded them, pointing his glasses at them in unconscious emphasis.

"But you acknowledge it's uncommonly pure and dense. Five percent," countered the elder maiden.

"Do you take me for some form of charity, young lady? Four percent. And before you get any bright ideas about 'persuading' me to raise the price, our company maintains a personal fighting force specifically to protect us from pirates with... ideas..." the gold merchant primly warned them both.

At his words, the two exchanged glances, a silent conversation clearly passing between them. Finally, they nodded in unison before turning back to him.

"Your terms are acceptable," they chorused.

Ribbons of Steel

"I dunno about this, Kodachi," Miriam complained feebly, jingling the chains that were hanging from each of her clenched fists. Trepidation was written on her face as she watched the links sway back and forth.

"It'll be fine! You already make some use of chain weaponry in your fighting style; further honing your aptitude with the chains themselves is a logical progression," the smaller girl replied confidently, brandishing her own whip.

"I use my anchors as flails, yeah, but that's a whole different kettle of chowder!" Miriam protested.

"Then it will be a useful addition to your skill set," Kodachi replied, completely unphased.

"I suppose," Miriam sighed, shaking her head. 'Sheesh, she sure doesn't let up easy when she puts her mind to something...'

"Now, the secret to successfully using a chain as a weapon is to treat it as an extension of your body. The motion must flow through you, from the leg up the spine and down into the arm, with the most important element being at the wrist!"

Kodachi twirled her whip for emphasis, producing a rolling crescendo of gunshot-like cracks as the weapon snapped repeatedly in mid-air.

"How do you even know that this'll work?" Miriam muttered, trying to repeat the movements she'd watched Kodachi display.

"I am a master of Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics; the ribbon was my weapon of choice until an unfortunate incident forced me to find a substitute," Kodachi explained proudly.

"A ribbon's a little different to a chain," Miriam dryly pointed out.

"Not the way I use it, dear," Kodachi purred, smirking at old memories. Seeing the skepticism written plainly on the wotan's face, she held out her hand and beckoned for one of the chains.

Miriam stared down at her, then visibly decided to humor her before uncurling the links wrapped around her wrist and passing them down to her smaller instructor.

Kodachi took the chain with both hands, creating a loose circle of links in her left and giving herself a good length to work with in her right, and then began to twirl that end through the air. Her ribbon-wielding expertise was on clear display as she made it dance through the air overhead, sinuously twirling and arcing with serpentine grace, weaving into vertical and horizontal figures-of-eight as Kodachi danced below it, legs kicking high and pirouetting as she moved to a rhythm only she could hear.

'...Wow. She wasn't kidding about the rhythmic gymnastics thing,' flashed through Miriam's head without a moment's thought. She metaphorically shrugged it off and tried to keep herself from staring like a little kid.

"Okay, yeah, that's pretty, but can it actually do anything in a fight?" she asked, folding her arms over her chest.

Kodachi gave her a sidelong glance, face almost as blank as Dyna's porcelain-like mug. A deft flick of her wrist and the dancing chain retracted as if spring-loaded, curling around her forearm. Without a single wasted movement, she thrust the now-enchained limb forward and the steely wreath exploded off of her wrist, hurtling forward and slamming into a boulder the size of Miriam's head. The stone exploded as if struck by a cannonball, disintegrating into shards barely the size of Kodachi's dainty little fists. A twist of the wrist, and Kodachi brought the extended chain scything around, striking a tree trunk that was easily thicker around than she was and cleaving through it like a hot knife through butter. A graceful pirouette, and the chain continued to spin around, lashing around Miriam's neck and snapping taut.

"Hey, what!?" the wotan gasped, instinctively trying to pull the chain free, choking as the steely links squeezed tight around her throat.

Kodachi let her squirm for a few moments, before a flick of the wrist freed the wotan and brought the chain snapping back over to her, where she drew it into a vertical spiral.

"Do you see my point now?" Kodachi asked sweetly, giving Miriam her biggest, most innocent smile... the one that everyone else in Nerima seemed to think made her look like a psycho, the cruel contemptuous cowards!

Miriam swallowed hard, tracing the faint bruises already darkening around her throat. "Yeah, no kidding! You sure showed me... now, can you teach me how to do that?"

"Certainly!" Kodachi chirped. "Now, watch me, and repeat what I do..."

To Cut the Wind

The sun shone brightly against a clear blue sky, a gentle wind rustling the breeze as the chatter of birdsong filled the air. But Harumi was blind to the pleasant scenery, his eyes closed in deep concentration as he stood with his katana drawn and clasped in both hands, facing towards a boulder nearly as tall as himself.

He inhaled and exhaled slowly and surely, a steady rhythm to ensure his mind was clear and his limbs were filled with power. Then, in an instant, his eyes snapped open and he let out a furious battle cry, scything his sword in a tremendous cutting arc.

The wind of his blade's passage through empty space roared like an angry beast, a shimmer of pure sharpness flying through the air, gouging a rent in the earth underfoot until it slammed squarely into the boulder he had aimed at and shattered into nothing. For a moment, all was still... and then the boulder's top slowly slid forward and crashed to the earth, cut neatly from its mooring.

...As did the two trees to either side of the boulder, their thunderous descent shaking the earth and startling birds from the trees around.

Harumi took in the devastation he had caused, and his usual smile grew brittle. "Tch. Still not good enough."

"Really? Looks like you nailed it to me."

The effeminate swordsman actually leapt in shock, twisting around to face the speaker with sword raised in his defense, only relaxing when he saw who it was.

"Oh, Captain Saotome! Sorry, you startled me..." He confessed, hanging his head and lowering his blade.

"Hey, if I wanted you to hear me coming, you would have," Ranma declared flippantly, striding past his crewmate to the boulder for a closer look. Where the two pieces had parted ways, the straight line through the rock was gleaming. Ranma experimentally ran a finger over the flat surface, and found it as smooth and slick as a polished marble tile.

"Not bad... Kodachi's brother would be impressed with swordsmanship like this. Why so hard on yourself?" Ranma asked casually.

"The Cutting Winds are one of the foundations of the Crying Willow School. But a true practitioner of the style should be capable of only cutting the things they want to cut. You remember when you met my mother, surely...?" Was the calm, somewhat depressed response.

"Yeah, I'll say. I'm guessing that 'cutting the wind with yer hands' trick is one of the more advanced moves of the school?" Ranma asked, to which Harumi simply nodded.

Walking back towards his crewmate, Ranma gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder. "Well, sorry, but I don't got a magic powerup for ya; you'll get better, but it's gonna take practice, practice, 'n' more practice!"

Harumi smiled, and it was a genuine one as he did. "I'm aware, captain. I swear to you, I'll master the move!"

"I'm sure you will," Ranma replied, grinning as he did. He moved on, ready to return to his own training. Behind him, Harumi took up his stance again, focusing on his next attack.

Optimizing Combat Protocols

Dyna's single eye pulsed rhythmically as she took in the forms of her new crewmates arrayed around her, forming a half-circle in front of her and taking up defensive postures.

"I do not believe this is a productive use of our time, Captain Saotome," the gynoid commented placidly.

"We all need to train, Dyna, and that includes you - I don't care if you're a robot, it's good for you!" Ranma bluntly retorted.

"Illogical. My 'muscles' are mechanical; they cannot grow like you organics. My life-support exo-armor is also not built to precisely mimic the humanoid bodily configuration, limiting its compatibility with standard martial arts maneuvers," she pointed out.

"Well, then consider this a chance to show us what you can do! You're not gonna just talk the Navy to death when we get attacked," Ranma huffed.

"Very well. Proceed," came the flat reply.

Ranma eyed his robotic recruit cautiously, but she made no move to attack. Losing patience, he gestured to Ryoga, beckoning for him to make the first move.

Ryoga barreled towards Dyna at full tilt, bellowing a battle cry as he went. The gynoid's eye lit up and her spidery legs flexed as she crouched low to the ground... well, as low as she could get, given her unusual body shape. At the last moment, before Ryoga could tackle her, she launched herself into the sky with a mighty spring, powered by a thrust of steam from previously concealed jets in her underbelly.

Ryoga stumbled to a halt, taken aback by the gynoid's surprising choice of reactions. He then had to leap forward to get out of the landing zone as she came crashing down. Before he could find his footing, the gynoid's right arm bent at an impossible angle to backhand him across the face, launching him to the ground stunned.

Even as he hit the ground, Dyna grabbed a stump and tore it from the earth, the creaking, snapping sound of roots ripping free from the soil filling the air before she hurled it at Shampoo.

The Zoan snapped into her hybrid form and shattered the rotting wood into a harmless cloud of splinters with a deftly aimed kick. Before the fragments had even hit the ground, she had exploded forward, hurtling towards the steampowered fembot.

Dyna swung her single battle claw around in a blow that probably would have knocked the head off of a charging bull, but Shampoo ducked underneath it and then leapt up to deliver a mid-air double-kick squarely into Dyna's barrel-shaped torso. Dyna's spidery legs dug into the ground, digging a set of trenches as the impact propelled her backwards, but she quickly bled off the momentum and scurried back into the fray, claw lunging forward and snapping as she tried to grab the Zoan.

Naturally, Shampoo had no intention of letting that happen, weaving nimbly around the groping strikes, the metallic talons missing her by a hair's breadth at times. She counter-attacked with a rapid-fire combo of punches, culminating in a spinkick that sent Dyna skidding back again.

Undaunted, the fembot lurched back into the fray. But, as she came charging across the grove, Ranma suddenly shouted, "Alright, enough!"

Dyna's spidery legs slammed down into the soil as one, her momentum causing her to skid momentarily before she finally came to a halt. Steam hissed from her vents from the efforts before she lowered her combat arm.

"You are satisfied, captain? As I said, my limitations are built in," Dyna placidly observed.

"I wouldn't go that far... I mean, yeah, there are some things to take into account, but I'm starting to get an idea of how we might help you get better," Ranma declared, thoughtfully rubbing his chin as he spoke.

"You are?" came the chorused response from all present.

"I am, yeah... but I need time to think. Dyna, you can power down, or whatever it is you do to rest. The rest of you; time we got back to training!"

Signature Weapon

The blacksmith, an older man with a salt-and-pepper five-o-clock shadow who had to be twice Kodachi's height with arms nearly as thick as her torso rubbed his bristly chin with a calloused hand before scowling thunderously down at the young woman hopefully holding the bag of blade shards out for his inspection.

"Do I look like a scrap metal dealer? Geddoudda here wid dat junk, a'fore I toss ya inta me furnace!"

Kodachi's smile faded like a desert rose, leaving behind only an icy glower, purple eyes boring holes into the impertinent blacksmith.

"There's no call to be so rude," she primly chastised him, drawing the string of the pouch closed with a decisive twitch of her fingers.

"You deaf, girlie? I said-!"

Faster than the untrained human eye could follow, Kodachi exploded into action. Her hand jabbed like the head of an angry snake, razor-sharp nails biting deep into major nerve clusters and sensitive pressure points, sending the behemoth crashing to the ground in an agonized heap, his limbs twitching as they betrayed him.

"Politeness costs nothing," Kodachi primly reminded him, then broke his nose with a well-aimed kick to the face that left him unconscious on the floor. Of course, from the look of it, she was hardly the first to do so. Without a glance backwards, she spun on her heel and strutted out of the smithy.

Shampoo glanced up from where she had been leaning against a decorative column as her crewmate briskly exited the latest smithy. "No luck here?"

"None. The smiths of this city seem to be short on both talent and manners," Kodachi sighed, shaking her head in dismay. Then blinked as she registered a lurid pink bubble forming between the zoan's pursed lips, only to burst and be sucked back into her mouth.

"What are you doing?" the confused heiress asked.

"Is bubble gum. Shampoo always want to try, but great-grandmother no let," Shampoo replied casually, before emphasizing her point by blowing a new bubble, this one as big as her head... which suddenly burst sharply, covering her entire face with a clinging layer of chewy, sticky muck. Shampoo let out a rabbit-like squeak of shock, followed by a string of Chinese curses as she clawed it away.

"I suppose we all have our vices," Kodachi mused, Then she shook her head and sighed. "It seems like this island will be no help to me, though."

"Shampoo not so sure... Shampoo ask around whilst Kodachi in there; here story of reclusive smith, out in back hill country. Maybe he can help?" the zoan suggested, finally yanking the last of the gum off of her face.

Kodachi pursed her lips and tapped her chin thoughtfully, humming to herself as she thought it over. Finally, she nodded decisively, tapping an upright palm with a clenched fist for emphasis. "Very well! It's a shame to waste such a pleasant morning, after all; we may as well exhaust all the options."

Shampoo giggled musically. "You just want get out of airen's latest training regiment."

"I most certainly do not!" Kodachi protested indignantly.

"So you say. Follow Shampoo," the Amazon declared cheerfully, already strutting off down the street, giving Kodachi no choice but to hurry after her.

"Well... this is certainly... rustic," Kodachi observed slowly.

They had left the bustling streets of Shelzad behind and were now a considerable way into the forest that grew along the hills rising behind the city. The structure before them had been the only one of its kind for a good while now.

It looked, to Kodachi at least, like something out of a history book come to life; a simple cabin, attached to a circular, enclosed area that was obviously the forge. But whoever lived here evidently wasn't the best at taking care of their property. The roof sagged and had small trees growing out of it, the wooden walls were warped and visibly growing coats of moss and fungus, and the door hung askew on its hinges.

"Is dump," Shampoo flatly replied. "But many skilled crafters not care much for housework. No can hurt to try, right?"

"I suppose not, we already came this far," Kodachi conceded.

She strode towards the door, stopped short, and then called out, "Hello? Is there anyone there?"

Nothing but silence greeted her efforts. She waited a moment, and called out again, and then a third time. Finally, she got a response in the form of clattering and cursing from the dark interior of the dilapidated shack. A massive bottle smelling strongly of liquor despite its emptiness sailed out from within, with Kodachi nimbly side-stepping it and allowing it to shatter against a tree behind her.

An incoherent bellow that might have been more cursing, but was too slurred to be comprehensible, presaged the hut's occupant as he staggered out into the light of day. He was a wiry older man, face weathered so deeply it more resembled a carved wooden mask, chin adorned with stubble so thick and rough-looking that you probably could have struck sparks on it had you dared. He was a potbellied scarecrow of a man, with spindly arms, legs and neck, a sunken chest, hands and feet the size of shovels, and a weathercock of a head, with jutting nose to form the beak and oversized ears to give the impression of wings.

Whilst his appearance might have been intimidating as he glowered at the two girls through eyes so bloodshot they were practically solid red, hitched up his pants and stomped towards them, it was the smell that blew their way as the wind shifted that truly made them recoil from him. The funk of sour booze and stale sweat was so thick it was almost tangible; Kodachi curled her lip at the reek, whilst Shampoo went green and covered her mouth with a hand in a desperate effort to hold back the bile, her Zoan-enhanced nose enhancing the pungency to almost unbearable levels.

"Whaddya want?!" he snarled at Kodachi, squinting suspiciously at her.

Drawing on all her pride and heritage, Kodachi pushed aside her disgust and gave the foul-smelling old drunk a brilliant smile. "Good sir, I came here in search of a smith..."

"Plenny o' smiffs in town. Go 'way!" he barked at her.

"Why we talking to old drunk?" Shampoo hissed in Kodachi's ear, but the Kuno girl ignored her Chinese companion.

"But none of them could hope to compare to your brilliance! You see, I found this sword, and I want to get it repaired..." Kodachi explained, taking up the pouch holding the sundered remains of Blooming Garden and opening it up so the smith could see it.

'Let's hope you're as gullible as most drunks...' She privately mused to herself.

Sneering, the supposed smith looked into the pouch, and then recoiled as if he'd been punched in the gut, face going quite pale under the layer of sweat, filth and stubble. "B-Blooming Garden!"

"Oh, you're familiar with it?" Kodachi asked, only partially trying to continue her initial plan of flattery.

"Should be; I made it," the old smith said. Now looking far younger and more sober than he did before - alas, he still stank to high heaven and low hell and everywhere in between - he approached her in a deceptively fast lurch.

"What're ya showin' me that, fer?" he demanded, still eying Kodachi suspiciously.

"Because I want to rebuild it," Kodachi answered proudly and immediately. "I believe this noble blade has been denied its place in history, and I think that you and I can amend that wrong..."

"To redeem mesel'..." the old smith murmured to himself. Then he shook his head and resumed his suspicious glowering at her. "Bah, a blade what broke once won't never be trusted to hol' togetha again..."

"Oh, but I don't want to make it into a conventional sword!" Kodachi assured him. "I believe that this weapon can be rebuilt in a new form; a form that can be made to cling together to cut like a sword, or extended to form a bladed whip - the perfect accompaniment to my fighting style! But I need a smith of true brilliance and talent to make my dream reality - and you, the father of this proud sword, are just the man to aid in its rebirth!"

"Yer crazy," came the flat appraisal, Kodachi losing her balance and falling flat on her face, whilst it took everything Shampoo had to keep from laughing at her crewmate's expression.

"But... I like yer gumption. Sounds just crazy enough to work. You got any idea how to make this work?" He added.

Spitting out some soil, Kodachi grinned triumphantly and curled her legs over her head like a scorpion jabbing its tail, using her gymnastics-imbued flexibility to thrust her feet against the soil before standing up by uncurling her spine, a forward flip in slow motion. Once she was upright again, she strode briskly towards the smith, excitement proving an adequate barrier against even so considerable a stench as his.

"Well, I'm not a smith myself, obviously, but I do have one or two ideas…"

Reach for the Sky

Another normal breakfast was wrapping up aboard the Stormbringer as the Kamikaze Pirates scraped their plates clean, relishing the luxury of having a wider variety of readily-available fresh food due to their anchored state, washing it all down with cups of sweetened fruit juice or tea. As they began piling up their plates for the pre-training clean, Ukyo suddenly spoke up.

"So, Ranchan, you've kept it to yourself for ages... what was that training manual I brought back? We're all dying to know what was in it."

"Huh?" A confused Ranma looked up, brow furrowed in noncomprehension as he stared at the assembled martial artists. Then realization dawned.

"Oh, right, that manual! I'll show it to you when we hit the beach... probably best to practice it there, anyway..."

Now thoroughly intrigued, everybody moved just a little bit faster than usual to get the galley cleaned down so they could get out of the ship. But soon enough, they were all on the beach, and the air practically hummed with anticipation as Ranma strutted in front of them, idly fanning the manual through the air as he did.

"Alright, as you all know, Ukyo stole this martial arts technique manual when we made that failed raid on Baron Sukumvit's birthday party. Since then, I've been studying it intensely..."

"So you did learn from your dad's mistakes," Nabiki quipped, unable to help herself.

Ranma gave her a dirty look, as did Shampoo, Ukyo and Kodachi, whilst Ryoga smirked and chuckled softly to himself. Miriam and Harumi exchanged confused glances with each other, whilst Dyna just looked bored... but then, she usually did. Hers wasn't the most expressive of faces, after all.

"Anyway! On a concept level, this move's pretty simple... but then, on that same level, so's the Bakusai Tenketsu or the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken..."

Ryoga, Nabiki and Shampoo all nodded with feeling at that, with the other martial artists only slightly less enthusiastic.

"The basic idea behind this 'Moonwalk' move is that you gotta learn how to kick off of the air itself. By doing that, you can jump even higher or even stay mid-air without falling..."

"Is cloudstepping technique?!" an excited Shampoo interjected, hands clasped before her and eyes shining with excitement as she thrust her face into Ranma's.

"Uh... yeah, I guess?" an uncertain Ranma nervously replied, cautiously taking a step back from his excited fiancee.

"Wait, how are you supposed to kick off the air?" an incredulous Ryoga asked, folding his arms over his chest and giving Ranma a skeptical look.

"That threw me too," Ranma admitted. "I think this manual is supposed to be paired with another one... but, from what's written in it, I think the secret is basically to kick really, really fast multiple times. Like, do an Amaguriken with your feet. But yeah, it's been giving me some trouble..."

Ranma handed the manual to Shampoo, who took it gently, before he put a little distance between them. As his crew watched, he hunkered down, and then launched himself into the air, soaring skyward until he was higher even than their resident half-giantess. He hovered there for a moment, in that way he did before gravity fully took hold again, and then he suddenly kicked with his right leg, the limb blurring into motion even for his crewmates' highly trained vision.

And that simple action promptly launched Ranma away at a 72-degree angle to the left, making him cartwheel away in full head-over-heel circles. A very clearly unwanted result, given the sharp burst of profanity that echoed over their heads. Ranma tried to arrest his tumble with another ultra-fast kick, but that only made things worse as he went flipping first this way and then that, before a final, ill-timed kick launched him into the beach like a human bullet, striking hard enough to kick up a spray of sand and dust that had everyone covering their eyes and mouths.

Coughing up grit, Ranma pushed himself out of the crater he'd dug when he'd hit the ground.

"It definitely works! ...I just haven't got it to work fully," he observed defensively.

"Aw, the great Ranma Saotome struggling with a technique? Whatever will you do?" Ryoga mockingly asked, grinning from ear to ear as he did so.

Shampoo tuned out the sounds of Ranma and Ryoga bantering, knowing there was no real animosity in it - no matter how Ryoga would protest such an assertion. She had more important things to do - namely, flicking through the manual that Ranma had so generously allowed her to hold while he did his demonstration. She furrowed her brow as she took in the diagrams and instructions... something about them just seemed to click...

The Chinese Amazon turned Zoan passed the manual to a confused Nabiki Tendo before shifting into her hybrid form. Like Ranma before her, she hunkered down, and then launched herself skyward, effortlessly reaching a height comparable to Ranma's.

"What's she doing?" Ranma wondered aloud, having shifted his attention from Ryoga.

As they watched, gravity took over and Shampoo began to fall back to earth... but then she kicked out with both legs at the same time, the bestial limbs blurring into motion. And somehow, impossibly, Shampoo stopped falling, instead bobbing back upwards in defiance of gravity.

"Beating you to the technique!" Ryoga replied at long last, though his efforts to make a snappy zing against his arch-rival were undermined by the fact he was staring at the Chinese Amazon defying gravity just like the rest of them.

And defy it she did, for what had to be almost two minutes of repeated furious leg pumping, but the strain visibly grew on her by the second, her face turning red as a beet and rivers of sweat starting to drip onto the thirsty sand below. Inevitably, her stamina ran out and she missed that vital kick-off moment, so she fell out of the sky like a stone.

"Shampoo!"

Ranma leapt into the air and caught her, effortlessly rolling in midair to bleed off his momentum as he carried her safely back to the ground.

Sprawling in Ranma's arms like a cross between a lazy cat-bunny and a bride, Shampoo gave her for-so-long reluctant husband-to-be an enormous proud smile. "Shampoo figure it out, airen! Must kick with both legs at same time! ...Is not as easy as sounds..."

"Heh, you did good, Shamps... but then, I shoulda known a bunny-girl would know how to jump good, eh?" Ranma chuckled warmly.

Shampoo's smile somehow grew even wider at that comment, and she reclined against Ranma with a soft sigh, nuzzling him.

"Shameless girl," Kodachi sniffed, though the complaint lacked the venom it would have borne once upon a time.

"Oh, like you wouldn't do the same thing in her shoes," Ukyo scoffed, but she was still staring at the two without blinking.

'...Okay, better not let push their limits too far,' came the only slightly frantic thought into Ranma's mind. He gently swung Shampoo to her feet, the zoan pouting as he did, then deliberately took a step back from her and clapped his hands.

"So! Like Shampoo just showed us, the move works. Anyone game to be next? Hey, Miriam, what about you?" He suggested, glancing up at the wotan.

"Me?! Oh, come on, do I look like a flying fish?" she protested, hand raised as she took a step back defensively.

"It's just a matter of leg strength!" Ranma assured her.

"If Miriam is reluctant to try, perhaps I might go first, Ranma darling?" Kodachi interjected, batting her eyelids at him.

"I don't mind!" Miriam added hastily.

Ranma simply shrugged. "Okay, then, Kodachi, if that's what you want - but I think we should all at least try our hand at this. If we can get this move down, that's a huge ace up our sleeves. It's okay if some of us aren't the best at it, but it can't hurt to try, right?"

"And just why were you looking at me when you said that, Ranma?" Ryoga demanded, before Kodachi 'accidentally' shoved him aside so she could take her place on the soft sand and prepare to take her own shot at the Moonwalk technique.

Talking 'bout Heavy Metal

"Ah gotta say, this weren't exactly an easy job. Matter of fact, Ah ain't never had an order quite like this a'tall," the gunsmith proclaimed, his thick bushy mustache twitching with emotion as he did.

Dyna ignored him, her attention being focused on far more important things. Namely, the array of specially ordered custom guns that had been spread out before her. It was only when she realized that he was staring at her, evidently anticipating an answer, that she made an effort to respond.

"You will be adequately compensated for your efforts," she declared bluntly.

"Damn straight Ah will; Ah'm th' best gunsmith on th' island! Now, this here's th' rifle you ordered... rifle, Ah says. Damn thing thinks it's a baby cannon! Ah'd ask if y'all can even fire th' thing without breaking yor arm... but Ah gots eyes. You ain't the usual pirate, is you?"

"That should be self-evident," Dyna replied simply. Even as she said that, she reached out with her primary arm and picked up the custom-built heavy rifle, joining its specially built end to the mounting slot on her secondary arm. A mental twitch, and the closest manipulators extended to adjust it and make sure it was properly locked into position, before she began testing its weight and rotating her joints to aim at imaginary targets.

"If'n y'all don't mind me sayin' so, that caliber's a bit overkill for just regular targets, ain't it?" the gunsmith observed.

"Correct. This weapon is for particularly hardened targets, or defense breaching. This is for general infantry..." she declared, reaching out with her primary arm to pick up the many-barreled automatic rifle from where it rested.

"Not gonna lie, that's th' one what interested me th' most. Never seen no schematics like that before," he added, eying it with great interest.

"And you never will again," Dyna placidly replied. "Now, your fee..."

With a free manipulator, she passed the gunsmith a bundle of beries from a hidden crevice in her exo-suit. The man accepted it from her and began rapidly thumbing through it.

"A pleasure doin' business, little lady. Y'all come back now, y'hear?"

"If I require more, I shall remember this shop," Dyna responded, even as she rotated around and began to scuttle back to her ship.

Push It To The Limit

"Shampoo not like this."

The statement was made calmly, matter-of-factly, and very loudly as the Kamikaze Pirates' official nurse finished examining Ranma.

"Aw, Shampoo, you worry too much," Ranma declared, lowering his arms from where he had raised them above his head so Shampoo could investigate his meridians.

"This move almost kill airen back on Shay-Lot!" the Chinese Amazon grimly reminded him.

"Yeah, but it also saved my butt from going squish!" Ukyo interjected, loudly slapping her ass for emphasis.

"Besides, if my old man can do this, what's it say about me that I can't? He couldn't even pull off the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken!" Ranma noted, his displeasure at the idea resounding in his voice and written all over his face.

Shampoo bared her teeth with a curl of her lip, her hybrid form exaggerating her canines and her incisors into menacing fangs. "Shampoo understand. Could be powerful weapon. Still not like that Ranma use with no teachers."

"I'll be careful, I promise!" Ranma assured her.

"Ranma hold ki back, no expend in one go. If Ranma no shut down when drain overwhelm, Shampoo do it for Ranma," the zoan warned him, her wagging finger of disapproval turning into a fist clenched so tightly that her knuckles audibly crackled and popped.

Ranma swallowed audibly and nodded his understanding.

Meanwhile, the native recruits were watching the preparations with varying reactions...

"What is this technique that Miss Shampoo is so afraid of?" Harumi wondered.

"Oh, it's awesome - I saw Ranma use it back on my island! He took down a full-sized giant with one punch!" Miriam excitedly announced, tail swishing behind her and inadvertently uprooting some small shrubs.

"If that is true, then this technique must be truly formidable," Dyna commented.

Ignoring the chorus from the peanut gallery, Ranma closed his eyes and began to concentrate. First came the simple stuff; flaring his battle aura. Relatively easy, once you knew the trick... mastering said trick, now that was the hard part. He reached deep inside himself, drawing upon his life energy and wrapping himself in it like a shroud, an act he abstractly knew was making him light up with a wreath of phantasmal flames. Once he felt it slithering across his skin, then came the harder part; intensifying, and then projecting...

The Kamikazes gaped, and some of them even gasped, as Ranma seemed to explode in a pillar of unearthly fire that twisted and curled in on itself as it climbed towards the heavens. It grew and grew until it was as tall as Miriam, and then stopped. Its amorphous shape grew more distinct, but only barely; a rounded hulk that could be charitably called a head, with two deep pits of shadow that might pass as eyes; thick great arms in mitten-like proto-hands slitting away from the trunk and clumsily waving through the air in a hesitant arcs.

"Airen? You feeling okay?" Shampoo called out, cupping her hands and shouting at the top of her lungs.

The ghostly-looking proto-humanoid visibly flinched, seemingly solid trunk gliding backwards like the foot of a giant slug.

"You don't gotta deafen me, Shamps, I'm right here!" came Ranma's voice, which defied all expectations by lacking the booming roar that would have characterized Happosai using this same trick.

"How's the air up there, Saotome?" Nabiki asked flippantly.

"It's... weird. You all look so small... well, 'cept for you, Miriam," Ranma nodded towards the resident wotan.

"But you feeling okay, airen?" Shampoo insisted.

"Yeah. Like, I can feel the drain, but it's nothin' I can't handle," Ranma assured her, nodding his primitive-looking head.

"How about touch? Not a lot of point using this move if you can't actually do anything with it," Ryoga pointed out.

Ranma's shadow-eyes seemed to focus on Ryoga. With far greater speed than any of his crewmates had anticipated, Ranma reached out and grabbed Ryoga, his fiery pseudo-hand enveloping the startled youth and yanking him off of his feet, with Ryoga screaming in shock all the way.

"Whaddya think, Ryoga? Have I got the solidness part enough?" Ranma asked, and even without a face, they could hear the cocky grin he was sporting.

"Put me down, you idiot!" Ryoga bellowed furiously.

In response, Ranma began to toss his rival up and down like a ball, juggling him even as Ryoga squalled in protest, understandably less than impressed.

"Wow, that's really something - you feel so light!" Ranma chuckled.

"This was bad enough when you did it to P-chan! Put me down, dammit! Whoooa!"

Ryoga's protests were cut off as Ranma suddenly staggered, causing him to drop Ryoga in the process. Ranma groaned, his aura-avatar mimicking him as he reached instinctively for his head, the ghostly shape dwindling like a candle melting on fast-forward. By the time Ryoga had landed and was straightening up with a scowl, Ranma had reverted to normal, visibly pale and swaying.

"Oookay... that drain really creeps up on ya... Phew, still, way improved over last time!" Ranma declared, somewhat shakily.

Shampoo immediately surged forward to start checking her captain/boyfriend out, whilst the rest of the crew crowded around.

Breaking Point Blues

The once-peaceful grove now thoroughly resembled a battlefield, with smashed or toppled trees, pulverized boulders and craters in the earth speaking to the sheer violence which had been committed here. The air was silent, all the birds and other wildlife having long fled, the only sound to be heard that of two young men panting in utter exhaustion.

Using the very last of his energy, Ranma propped himself up on his elbows and gave Ryoga what would be a death glare if he could only focus properly.

"Okay... I'll admit it... that Bakusai Tenketsu Revised training you did made you tougher..." he panted slowly.

"And you... you're getting stronger," Ryoga conceded, equally drained and mirroring Ranma's attempt to maintain a defiant attitude despite his exhaustion.

"Y'think... we should teach the girls that technique?" Ranma asked after a few minutes.

Ryoga blinked slowly, trying to keep his eyes from crossing as he did. "What? Why?"

"Well, it's done wonders for you! And let's face it, a bit more durability wouldn't hurt them..." Ranma pointed out.

"...I don't know. You really think it's a good idea to put girls through training like that?" Ryoga wondered uncertainly.

"Hey, Shampoo pulled it off, back on Mecha Island!" Ranma couldn't resist pointing out.

"Mm. Maybe... I'd put it to them, see what they think," Ryoga finally announced.

"I might... just... do that..."

And right there and then, both boys finally found their limits, stubbornness and pride no longer able to substitute for stamina as they both flopped face-first into the dirt.

They lay there in silence for several long minutes, before one of them said, "Training Miriam's gonna be hard..."

"Yeah; where're we gonna find something tall enough to hang her from?"

"I was thinking more what're we gonna hit her with to toughen her up? Bullets already bounce off of her skin!"

Dress for Success

Ryoga curled his lip as he looked at the sign above the shop door proudly proclaiming "Women's Clothing" as if it had insulted his mother. Unthinkingly, he looked first left and then right, staring longingly at the crowds of people just going about their business in Shelzar's marketplace.

'I really don't wanna do this... but, damn it all, I don't have a choice, do I? I mean, what else am I supposed to do when I need something to wear in this stupid new cursed body - depend on Ranma's hand-me-downs and Harumi's emergency tailoring forever? Ugh, that's even worse! Especially wearing something I know Ranma was wearing, bleugh!'

Shuddering in disgust, Ryoga made up his mind. Making sure to keep reorienting himself so he didn't lose sight of his goal, he retreated to an alcove. Once he felt he had some privacy, he took a waterskin and poured it over his head.

Tugging her shirt to try and preserve a bit more modesty, the now-female Ryoga marched briskly back across the street and through the shop's door. A small bell tinkled musically as she - he! - entered, attracting the attention of the shopkeeper; a young, handsome blonde man, with a kindly smile and somewhat effete features.

"Oh, a customer! Welcome to Chez Magnifique, mi'lady! And how may I help you today?"

"I'm a-!" Ryoga stopped and bit her lip until it bled to keep herself from completing that complaint.

"Uh, I mean... I need some new clothes..." the boy-turned girl corrected herself.

"Well, certainly, that is what we're here for!" the shopkeeper chuckled warmly. "What precisely are you looking for?"

"I... uh... just... some everyday stuff, I guess," Ryoga sheepishly mumbled, feeling her cheeks burn with mortification as she did.

A confused look flashed very briefly over the shopkeeper's features, but professionalism quickly took over and he gave the embarrassed girl another welcoming smile, clasping his hands together as he did so.

"Oh, but of course, of course; you need to browse! Just sing out if you require my assistance!" He assured her.

"Y-yeah, I'll do that," Ryoga muttered, turning away from the shopkeeper and trying to lose herself in the confusion of dresses, skirts, and other, more mysterious feminine apparel.

Tempering One's Mettle

"Eeeyaaagghhh-goddammsonnuvvabitch! Hooooot!"

The Kamikaze Pirates looked up from where they had been starting to gather around the makeshift picnic table to take a break from the day's training to instead stare at their captain. Seeing that he had managed to set himself on fire... again... they collectively hung their heads and sighed.

"Shampoo get burn ointment," their designated medic declared, passing the food she had been holding to a very surprised Nabiki.

Ranma hissed in pain, blowing on his fingers and glowering at them as if they'd betrayed him.

'At least they're not burning as badly as they used to... that's progress, right?'

"Maybe you oughta consider quitting, honey? All this move seems to be doing is hurting ya!" Ukyo called from where she was dishing up an assortment of cold cuts of meat. Which was one of the advantages that the Grand Line had over Japan, the Nerimites had privately conceded; meat was far cheaper and more plentiful here than in their homeland.

"No way! I'm not letting this stupid technique get the better of me! I'll master it, even if it kills me!" Ranma snapped back.

"And it just might at this rate," Ryoga dryly observed, before snatching a drumstick so fast that he managed to avoid the chastising swat from Ukyo.

Watching Ranma allow Shampoo to cleanse and dress his burns, muttering furiously to himself, Nabiki rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Honestly, Ranma; you're as stubborn as my sister sometimes. What next, you're going to try practicing the move underwater?"

Ranma suddenly sat up bolt straight at her words. He cocked his head to one side, held it there for a few moments, then snapped the fingers on his unburned hand. "Y'know what, Nabs? That's actually a pretty good idea! Cold water keeps my temperature down, and being submerged means there's nothing to ignite - that might actually help me control it better! I gotta go check - ow!"

"Airen going nowhere," Shampoo growled, tugging on Ranma's ear again emphasis. "Airen sit, eat lunch like civilized being, and give medicine a chance to work. New training idea come after."

She proceeded to head back to the table, dragging an unhappy Ranma with her as she went, much to the amusement of her crewmates as she forced him to sit at the makeshift table like a misbehaving child.

Bloody Beach Party

The sinking sun stained the sea a brilliant melange of bloody reds, fiery oranges and deep pinks, giving way to a clear night sky already sparkling with stars. It was looking like a beautiful evening, and the Kamikaze Pirates had decided to take advantage of it. Having commandeered one of the more remote beaches as their own personal port while they were anchored here, they had assembled a roaring fire, around which they intended to cook their evening meal. But before that, there was fun to be had; after all, as Nabiki always said, all work and no play made for a dull mind!

Miriam poked her head out of the water, letting the cool brine filter through her gills as she turned her attention towards the beach, where a rigorous game of Martial Arts Volleyball had broken out. The only ones not playing were Dyna and Nabiki, who had both chosen to start getting things ready for the post-game cookout, Miriam herself, and last but not least, Harumi.

Now the wotan turned her attention back to the water, letting the excited shouts, battle cries and the sound of craters being left in the once-pristine sand wash over her ears. She grinned a toothy grin as she saw her boyfriend floating lazily on the water, then slipped beneath the surface, intent on giving him a playful surprise.

As she opened her eyes and let them adjust to being submerged, however, she saw something that made her bare her fangs in rage. Skulking silently through the deep towards the unaware human was a monstrous sea creature; a blubbery great beast that combined the worst elements of a walrus and a shark, easily twenty five feet in length. Its small, piggy, lifeless black eyes were fixed on the floating form above, its great jaw gaping open to reveal sharpened tusks similar to those of a bull hippo. It clearly had its eye set on a meal of human flesh...

Bubbles billowed out of Miriam's mouth as the wotan roared in fury, launching herself forward with a titanic flex of her tail at speeds only a fishman - or a half-fishman, in her case - could achieved. She sped through the water like a living missile, slamming into the beast - probably some kind of Sea King, but she had no desire to be academic - with a massive crash, probably breaking bones even through its thick layer of hide and blubber.

The blow was certainly enough to make it recoil backwards, giving the enraged wotan a chance to wrap her arms around it, open her jaw as wide as it could possibly get, and slam her face into the side of its throat. Teeth honed by evolution to saw through shell and carve through bone bit deep through leathery hide into dense blubber beneath, shredding all the way down to the vulnerable flesh below. Miriam's throat bulged as she instinctively swallowed the chunk of meat she had torn from her prey, gore sluicing its way down her gullet and freeing her mouth to take another bite as blood billowed into the water around her face.

The titanic struggle below displaced water like an underwater explosion, sending the startled Harumi tumbling off of his floating bed and into the sea. As his shocked eyes peered through the crimson-stained murk, he made out the shadowy forms of two beasts thrashing in the gloom, and he instantly realized the gist of what was happening. Without a wasted motion he powered back to the surface and swam for the shore as fast as he possibly could, hitting the beach and sprinting as fast as his protesting muscles would allow him until he collapsed just past the surfline.

"Yo, Harumi, what the hell happened?!" Ranma demanded as he and the rest of the crew descended on the gasping swordsman.

"I-In the water! Something attacked Miriam!" he choked out, pointing a trembling finger towards where he had been blissfully lounging, the waters ominously still and silent save for a great spreading stain of red...

Ranma cursed and started towards the water, Ryoga and Ukyo close behind, only for the trio to stop in their tracks as the towering form of Miriam burst forth from the relative shallows.

The wotan's shoulders shook as she panted harshly from exertion, stomach wobbling as her gulping for air jiggled the great lumps of meat and blubber she had swallowed merely seconds before. Apart from those signs of a struggle, however, Miriam was unharmed. The waves crashed against her thighs as she marched out of the surf, one hand absently carrying the head of her defeated adversary, its mighty tusked jaws lolling as it swung back and forth with each step, her fingers wrapped tight around the gristly remnants of its spinal column. Her eyes fell on Harumi and she immediately dropped the gruesome trophy in the wet sand, crossing the distance between them in a few mighty strides and snatching him into the air before he could even muster a word to express his relief.

"You're alright! Oh, when I saw that thing coming for you, I was afraid I'd be too late!" the wotan cried, hugging her smaller companion close so that she could nuzzle his face with her cheek. A slightly awkward gesture of affection, considering the size difference, but it worked.

Too caught up in the emotions to even think about their audience, Harumi hugged her back. "I'm fine! But I was so worried about you - there was all that blood!"

"None of it mine! Stupid beast had no idea who it was messing -" Miriam's half-assurance, half-boast was cut off as her stomach suddenly gurgled menacingly, the only warning before she let out a thunderous belch, powerful enough to make Harumi's long, girlish hair flap like it had been caught in a gale wind.

"Oh my gods, I'm sorry! Damn thing tasted like it was half-rancid already - it's already giving me wicked indigestion," the mortified wotan whined, blushing red as a beet even through her blue-and-white skin.

Stoically, Harumi tossed the hair out of his eyes and hugged her again. "I don't even care, I'm just so glad you're okay."

All the tension visibly bled out of Miriam and the wotan sighed in relief, nuzzling her human beau again. Then they realized they were being watched and both blushed bright red.

"Uh, there's a perfectly good explanation for this!" Harumi began.

"Hey, you're crewmates; it'd be weirder if you weren't concerned for each other's safety," Ranma declared, flippantly waving a hand in dismissal and watching as both Miriam and Harumi sagged in relief.

"Uh, yeah, that's right, just crewmates looking out for each other," Miriam agreed, carefully lowering Harumi back to the sand before decisively clapping her hands together.

"So! When do we eat dinner? I need something to wash that taste out of my mouth, bad!"

Stay Outta The Kitchen

"So, why Ukyo want talk to Shampoo?" The Chinese Amazon asked idly from where she was running her whetstone across her dao. She paused for a moment to carefully test the edge against her thumb, then nodded to herself in satisfaction.

"It's about this 'fire ki' stuff that Ranchan is doing," Ukyo explained, finishing the polish on her battle spatula.

Shampoo sighed and shook her head. "Shampoo feel too-too bad, watching airen hurt self like that. Shampoo know that no move come without sweat and pain, but still not like it. What Ukyo want?"

Ukyo looked hesitant for a moment, fiddling with her battle spatula, before she visibly steeled herself and looked at Shampoo. "Do you think I could learn it?"

That was evidently not what Shampoo had expected to hear, given the wide-eyed, gobsmacked look that Ukyo got in response. It actually took several moments before Shampoo slapped her cheeks and regained her focus, staring intently at Ukyo.

"Why Ukyo ask question like that?!"

"Well, I'm a pretty passionate girl, plus, I work with fire all the time - why shouldn't I be able to learn ki moves like that?!" Ukyo defensively retorted, a faint blush on her face.

"...Well, yes, Ukyo has right personality to use fire ki, in Shampoo's opinion, but why Ukyo want to learn that? Thought Ukyo vow to only use Martial Arts Okonomiyaki," The Chinese Amazon replied.

"Hey, I've got to keep up with the rest of you! Besides, that's not abandoning my current style like Kodachi is doing, that's just adding some more techniques to my repertoire. Can you imagine how useful it would be if I could cook things with just my battle aura?" came the defensive protestation.

"...Huh. Shampoo can see it, now Ukyo say so," the zoan slowly confessed, staring slightly off into space as she did.

"But there's something else I was wondering..." Ukyo added, drawing Shampoo's attention back to her, a quizzical expression splashed across the Chinese girl's face.

"We both know that Ranchan... ain't exactly doing so well with this move," Ukyo observed, unconsciously rubbing her hand and wincing at the memory, an action that Shampoo mirrored before nodding.

"But I've been thinking... maybe the problem is him trying to channel it through his body? On the other hand, if I channel it into my spatula, which is made to /take/ that kind of heat..."

"...Yes, yes, Shampoo can see it! Sound like clever idea to Shampoo," the Chinese Amazon proclaimed.

"You really think so?" An excited Ukyo asked. "Do you think you could help me practice it?"

Shampoo blinked in surprise. "You want Shampoo to help? Why not ask Airen?"

"Well, for one, you're the one who knows the most about ki and battle aura after Ranchan. For another..." Here, Ukyo looked sheepish. "Well, I was hoping I could surprise Ranchan with a new move..."

Shampoo blinked again, and then smiled widely. "Shampoo understand completely... Shampoo happy to help Ukyo!"

Grinning like an idiot, Ukyo sprang forward and grabbed Shampoo's hands, shaking them eagerly. "Oh, thank you, Shampoo! You're the best!"

"Shampoo know, but is nice to hear it," the cabbit zoan purred, smirking smugly.

Fists of Fire

"Thank you, and come again!"

As the door swung closed behind him, merrily jingling the bell that hung above it, Ranma sighed softly to himself even as he adjusted the bulging sack of bandages and burn ointments now resting between his shoulders before setting off.

'I probably will at that... stupid fire ki. The Moko Takabisha wasn't this hard! Heck, even the Shishi Hokodan wasn't so bad, even if I don't really got the personality for it! Bah, if only there was somebody I could talk to about this stuff...'

"Fire Fist!"

Those words, shouted at the top of the speaker's lungs, followed by a massive explosion jarred Ranma back to reality.

'What the hells was that?!'

Following his ears, Ranma raced to a nearby alleyway, plumes of smoke wafting from within. Rounding the corner of its entrance, he stared down at a typical dark, grungy forgotten space between buildings. At the far end, he saw a mess of generic thugs and muggers lying unconscious on the ground, their clothes smoking and smoldering and their exposed skin visibly mottled with blisters and first-degree burns. Standing over the fallen crooks was a half-naked young man, clad only in shorts, thick black boots, and a wide-brimmed hat. That would have deserved a second look anyway, but the /really/ unusual thing about him was that his right arm from the shoulder down was a flickering mass of flames that, even as Ranma watched, resolved itself back into a flesh and blood limb.

"If you losers didn't know anything about Blackbeard, you should have just said so!" the fiery stranger complained lightly.

'Fire powers...? Even if it is a Devil Fruit, he may be just the guy I need!' Ranma mused to himself. Decision made, he stepped forward into the alley.

"Hi there!" Ranma called, deliberately announcing his presence.

The stranger turned to him and smiled warmly. "Oh, hey there! You want something?"

"Just admiring your handiwork," Ranma replied, lightly nudging one crispy but still living body with his boot. "Devil Fruit user, are you? I'm guessing some kind of fire Logia?"

"That's right; I ate the Flame-Flame Fruit. Fire-Fist Ace, they call me," replied the other man.

"Well, now that's a stroke of good luck for me," Ranma announced.

"Oh. Bounty hunter, are you? Well, I haven't beaten up one of you losers in almost a week," Ace noted, cracking his knuckles and smirking evilly.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa, time out buddy, take a chill pill!" Ranma interjected, waving a hand frantically to catch the Logia's attention. "I've been trying to work out a fire blast technique of my own, and I was thinking you might be able to train me!"

That took the wind out of Ace's sails. "Huh? Seriously?"

"Well, yeah! You use fire, I want to use fire, it makes perfect sense!" Ranma declared.

"...Huh. Didn't know there was a Paramecia equivalent to the Flame-Flame Fruit, but I suppose there had to be one," Ace mused to himself, scratching his chin absently.

"So, will you train me?" Ranma asked hopefully.

Ace immediately shook his head and said, "Nah. Sorry kid, I'm too busy."

"What! Come on, I'm a fast learner, I don't need you for very long, I promise!" Ranma insisted.

"Look, kid, I've got a crewmate-killing son of a bitch named Blackbeard to track down, I don't have time to play with you," Ace scoffed.

"Who's playing? Come on, I wouldn't be asking if there was anyone else!" Ranma pleaded. When Ace scoffed and turned his back on Ranma, the martial artist's mind raced, and as it so often did in that scenario, a plan sprang into his thoughts.

"What about a wager?!" Ranma suggested.

Ace stopped and turned back to face him, one eyebrow raised inquisitively. "Go on..."

"If I can hit you, just once, you'll train me for a day!" Ranma declared, emphatically pointing at Ace as he spoke.

The older youth mulled it over, tapping his chin, before giving Ranma a cocky smirk. "Deal!"

'Probably expects me to have no way to touch a Logia... pity for you, Ace!'

"Moko Takabisha!" Ranma cried, channeling all of his pride in how cleverly he'd tricked the Devil Fruit user into this rigged wager and his confidence that what he was doing would work in a tightly focused blast of ki that he launched like a bullet right at Ace's head.

The Fire Logia was smiling confidently right until the basketball-sized globe of spirit energy hit him squarely in the face with enough force to literally knock him head over heels, causing him to dramatically backflip across the alley before slamming into the ground backfirst with enough force even to make Ranma wince...

For a second or two. Then Ranma smirked and stalked leisurely over to Ace, who was blinking up in confusion at the sky above.

"What the hell just happened?!" the Logia demanded.

"You lost, that's what. So one day of training it is," Ranma cheerfully reminded him.

Ace glowered at Ranma for a second, then sighed and smirked lightly.

"Well, a deal's a deal," he announced, before nimbly flipping himself back to his feet and brushing off some of the grime from his shoulders.

"Alright, follow me; my ship's this way," Ranma announced, already starting to take the lead.

"Your ship?" A bemused Ace asked.

"We can hardly train here! Besides, my crew will want to see your lessons, and not to mention it's getting close to lunch - I'm hardly going to ask you to teach me and not feed you for it," Ranma drawled even as he walked away.

"You're laying on lunch? Why didn't you say that in the first place?!" Ace demanded, even as he hurried after Ranma.

Introspections

As the door to her bedroom shut behind her, Nabiki sighed loudly.

'What a day... ohh, I'm exhausted.'

A few brisk steps and then she dramatically whirled around before flopping back-first onto the soft, welcoming mattress of her bed. She lay there spread-eagled, relishing the chance to rest muscles that were still tender even after a long hot soak in the Stormbringer's bathtub.

'Oh, my aching... everything. I swear, some days I think this training regime is going to kill me before this crazy sea will get the chance!'

She lazily shook her head at the thought, then lay there silently for a few long minutes, before rolling over onto her side and spinning around so she was lined up with the bed.

'Still... as much as it sucks... I can't deny it's working. I've never felt so fast before, or so strong!'

Half-closed eyes sleepily focused on a dumbbell lying on the floor near her bed, before she reached out and lazily plucked it into the air, holding it suspended effortlessly before letting it drop with a resounding clank to the floor.

'Back home, I would have strained to lift that with both hands... now it feels light as a feather. I remember Akane always had so much to complain about whenever she talked of trying to get Ranma to spar with her... I wonder if she would have been so thrilled to have him training her if she knew what it'd actually be like? Still... it does have its upsides...'

A smile quirked her lips as she reflected, her thoughts turning to memories of a certain pigtailed martial artist turned pirate. And not the usual borderline salacious memories of him flaunting an unfairly well-formed body that she had enjoyed even before this world-hopping mess... well, not /just/ those memories. Instead, her mind's eye served her with a buffet of more... /tender/ moments. Ranma smiling with genuine happiness at seeing her achieving a challenge he'd presented. Him outright laughing at a clever jest or a particularly clever quip. His hands on her body, soft yet respectful as he helped her assume the proper position for a martial arts kata...

Nabiki bolted upright, shaking her head ferociously.

'Get a grip, girl! Okay, so he's hot - he was hot back in Nerima too, and you kept your cool there! You are Nabiki Tendo - you are not going to become a giggling mess like those other girls!'

She flopped back down with a sigh, staring up at the ceiling.

'But... it wouldn't hurt to ask Ranma to spend a little time with me that isn't just for training, either...'

Bigotry Blues

Harumi watched the seething crowd flow through the market place and smiled as he drank in the sights and sounds of the many stalls laden with colorful goods and thronged with people who were almost as colorful.

"I always loved the market; so vibrant and lively," he noted wistfully.

"Yeah, it has its charms... it's nicer when you don't need to worry about being stepped on, I suppose," Miriam noted, her amused giggle incongruously girlish compared to the wotan's hulking frame. Her tail twitched, but was kept carefully restrained, even though the market-goers did their best to give the half-giantess a careful berth.

"Nicer still when you have pleasant company to go with," Harumi replied, reaching up to tenderly stroke her upper thigh... more because that was as high as he could reach without than out of cruder intentions.

"You are such a little flirt," the wotan proclaimed, smiling as she said it and reaching down to affectionately stroke the crossdressing swordsman's head with her finger.

"Ugh, do you freaks have to do that in public?!" Came a whining, disgust-soured voice.

Man and wotan's metaphorical hackles bristled at the insult, and Harumi couldn't help but turn to face the source of the derisive words.

Standing across the street, normally attractive faces twisted into disdainful sneers, a trio of young women looked down their noses at the mismatched pair. Two turned their faces away from Harumi's icy stare and cold, fixed grin, the gesture intended as one of haughty dismissal, but betraying fear to the swordsman's trained eyes. The third, however, met his gaze defiantly, scowling at him.

"Something troubling you?" Harumi asked, a bright, brittle edge to his tone that matched the coldness in his eyes and the half-rictus grin on his lips.

"You pair of degenerates, that's what! It's bad enough you /touch/ that slimy great brute, but doing it in public? People can see you!" jeered the woman.

Harumi's smile faded slowly into a blank look. Not a flicker crossed his mask-like features as his hand strayed towards the hilt of his sword...

Which was when Miriam's hand landed on his shoulder... Well, as much of it as would fit, anyway, making him stagger for a moment as he had to compensate for the weight.

"I thought we were going to check out that ice creamery you found, Harumi?" Miriam asked, her voice cheerful and bright.

The crossdressing swordsman glanced up at her, then over at the women, before he nodded subtly and turned his attention fully back to her, smiling warmly up at her.

"Of course, my lady, forgive me. It was this way," he declared, gesturing in the desired direction.

As the two turned away, the rude young woman scoffed loudly. "Of course, a stupid great fat brute like that only cares about where its next meal is coming from..."

With deceptive speed, Miriam's tail whipped around, its vertical fins catching a pile of foul-smelling rubbish that had previously been lying in a pile nearby. Scooped up by the makeshift shovel of flesh and cartilage, the garbage was sent flying in an arcing spray, spattering the offensive trio of women in a rain of noisome filth, eliciting shrieks of disgusted outrage and protest.

"Oops. Clumsy me," Miriam declared lightly, grinning a shark-toothed grin at Harumi, whose own smile deepened in response. He rested his shoulder against her thigh for a moment, and then the two moved on quickly, passing through the ever-present crowd and vanishing.

Behind them, their would-be tormentors wailed and screeched, trying desperately to wring foul fluids from hair or dress and to scrape themselves clean.

"Those disgusting perverts! How dare they do this!?" shrieked the ringleader.

A sudden maniacal cackle of dark glee rang out, shrill enough to drown out the usual clamor of the marketplace.

"It seems to me that you received what you deserved! But obviously you need a lesson in showing our crewmates the proper respect..."

The three dirtied girls turned to face the strange voice, and paled at what they saw. An imperious young woman whose eyes glowed with an almost manic light as she smiled and fingered the blade of a sword; a tough-looking young woman in somewhat boyish clothing who scowled as she cracked her knuckles, and a half-woman half-beast girl that bared her fangs and flexed clawed fingers. All radiated menace as they began to close in...

How Does Your Garden Grow

"Ohhh, it's beautiful!" Kodachi crooned, admiring the blooms in front of her. They looked like roses, but had petals of marble white, streaked with veins of pitch black and bloody crimson. She reached out to touch the closest blossom with just the very edge of her finger, only for her hand to be slapped away.

"Don't touch, dearie! Those blooms are as deadly as they are lovely. One good breath of that pollen, and even a giant may swoon - a slip of a girl like you would be taking a very long sleep indeed," cackled the botanist, an older woman, shorter than Kodachi but much thicker around the middle, with almost incongruously dainty hands and long, dextrous fingers. She emphasized her point by waving her right index finger at Kodachi in mock reproach for her actions.

Kodachi smiled back in good humor and even shook her hand in playful exaggeration. "Duly noted, madam. I must say, you have a wonderful collection here - why, I have never seen so many exotic blooms and herbs before! And all of them so wonderfully poisonous! You would not believe the difficulty I had in finding some suitably toxic specimens to replace my lost garden at the other shops around town..."

The near-crone smiled a dark, ugly smile. "Oh, I can believe, dearie. Sadly, not many people understand that beauty is at its pinnacle when paired with deadliness..."

"Ohh, too true, too true, madam! It's such a shame that those such as you and I must hide our light beneath a bushel, as the saying goes," Kodachi lamented.

"Such a nice girl... I knew, when you walked through those doors, that you were going to be special," cackled the old woman, who reached up and slung a conspiratorial arm around the younger girl's shoulders.

"Since you clearly can understand the true beauty of my little darlings, perhaps you might be interested in seeing some of my... special specimens, hmm?" she suggested, winking and grinning a gap-toothed grin.

"Oh, madam, please lead the way," Kodachi cooed excitedly, eagerly following as the surprisingly spry old lady swiftly began leading her towards a back door.

For Love of Money

"OOOF! Hey, watch where you're going!" Nabiki yelled indignantly as she recovered from nearly being knocked off her feet as another teenage girl rammed into her from behind.

"You okay, Nabs?" Ranma asked in concern, twisting to face her properly.

"Yes, I'm fine... some people have no manners," the eldest member of the displaced Nerimites huffed indignantly.

"Less than you think - she stole your wallet!" Ranma shouted, pointing at the girl who had run into Nabiki... who promptly proved he was right by starting to run as fast as she could, weaving through a shocked, startled crowd of bystanders.

"What?!" Nabiki snarled in a rage, and immediately took off after the thief. The crowd didn't cooperate, seemingly stunned stupid by the sudden revelation, forcing Nabiki to dodge around or weave through their ranks at speed.

"Come back here!" she bellowed lividly, elbowing one particularly obstructive individual aside in her pursuit.

'Kami-damned gawkers! I have to catch her! I need - I need...!'

And then, in one emotion-fueled instant, everything clicked into place. Without breaking stride, Nabiki crouched down, the muscles in her thighs and calves surging with power drawn from unexpected wells deep within, and exploded into the air in a titanic leap that carried her over the heads of gasping, gawking pedestrians and onto the roof of a nearby stall.

Later, after the adrenaline wore off, Nabiki would marvel at what she had done, at replicating a feat she had always watched and deep down admired from the sidelines back in Nerima. She would close her eyes and savor the feeling of the wind rushing through her hair and caressing her skin... but, in the here and now, there was only the bone-deep need to pursue and to capture.

From pavilion to rooftop to steeple she bounded, eyes sweeping across the streets below like a hawk in pursuit of a mouse. And then, when she spotted the fleeing pickpocket, she dove upon her like a bird of prey, her feet slamming into the thief's shoulders and driving her crashing to the ground in a tangle of limbs.

"What the hell?!" screeched the pickpocket, before Nabiki put her foot to the back of her skull and pushed her face into the dirt.

"You have to be a special kind of stupid to steal from the Kamikaze Pirates!" the indignant Nabiki growled. When Ranma touched down lightly on the cobbles nearby and the motion caught her eye, she turned to face him with a ferocious expression.

"And you! Why didn't you help me?!" she snarled.

"Didn't seem like you needed it," Ranma coolly replied, folding his arms behind his head. "Nice job on your first roofhop, by the way."

"Huh?" Nabiki responded dumbly, cocking her head at the comment. She wracked her brain, trying to puzzle out what Ranma had meant by that comment, only for her eyes to go wide as the memories of what she'd just done came flooding back.

"No way... I did that?!" she breathed in amazement.

"You sure did! I'm so proud of you!" Ranma told her, beaming with delight.

"Yeah, I'm just thrilled for ya... now will ya get offa me?!" screeched the pickpocket that Nabiki was still standing on.

Hittin' the Books

"Why are we here?" Ranma asked casually, idly tapping a tattoo on the table he was sitting at whilst Kodachi, Ukyo and Dyna looked up at him from their respective seats.

"You forgotten, Ranchan? We decided we'd check out the library today to see if we could find any useful information," Ukyo replied.

"No, I get that. I meant... why are we in the kid's section?" Ranma explained patiently.

"Because this is where most of the books concerning myths and legends have been cataloged, Ranma dearest," Kodachi replied smoothly, not even looking up from the book she was flicking through.

"And myths and/or legends often contain at least a few grains of fact," Dyna added, using her manipulators to flick through two books simultaneously.

Ranma sighed softly, but let the matter go, turning his attention to the pile of books that'd been assigned to him, picking up the topmost one.

'Well, it's not like I mind taking the occasional break - good for the body, an' all that. 'Sides, I like reading. So, what've we here? ...Noland the Liar? Huh.'

He was about to crack it open, when he stopped at the sight of the cover art, which depicted a chibi figure of a man in an old-fashioned suit with a dopey smile on his face and a big chestnut sitting on his head. He stared at the sight, unable to take his eyes off of it.

"Hey, Kodachi?" He asked.

"Yes, Ranma darling?"

"I gotta know... why don't you wear roses on your head?"

Kodachi blinked slowly in confusion, a gesture that Ukyo mirrored. "Um... come again, dear?"

"Well, yer old man is always wearing that silly bonsai palm tree on his head. Kind of surprised it's not a family tradition," Ranma explained.

"Now that he mentions it... yeah, that kind of makes sense," Ukyo mused.

"That tonsorial abomination is entirely my father's delusion, and it only began after he went on that sabbatical to Hawaii!" an offended Kodachi protested.

Dyna watched as her organic companions began to banter and tease each other, clearly having lost interest in reading for the moment, before delicately reaching out with her manipulators and taking the book, quietly beginning to scan the pages and upload its content to her memory banks.

Masochistic Meal

Normally, Ukyo enjoyed visiting the marketplace; even after arriving in the Grand Line, it was one of life's little pleasures for her. But today, she stomped her way through the marketplace, scowling thunderously and barely aware of her surroundings.

'Those miserable little witches! I work and slave over a hot stove to feed us all, and do I get any thanks for it? All they ever do is tease me about making okonomiyaki! I do not make okonomiyaki for every meal! And even if I do make a lot of it, well, so what? I'm good at making okonomiyaki! They hate it so much, why don't they take a turn at cooking?! Not like they aren't all decent cooks themselves!'

Still fuming, Ukyo glanced around, realizing she'd reached the part of the market where the fishmongers gathered. As her eyes fell on one stall's contents in particular, she got an idea. A wonderful, awful idea...

'They want to complain about my cooking? Well, let's give them something to really complain about...!'

"Yo, Ucchan, what's for dinner?" Ranma called as he and the rest of the crew trudged into the Stormbringer's galley, tired and hungry after a long day's training.

"Something special, Ranchan!" came the answering cry, and as the Kamikaze Pirates took their usual seats around the table, they couldn't see the evil grin spread large on Ukyo's face.

They did have a perfect view as Ukyo came sweeping out of the kitchen, arms laden with a load of covered plates that would've been impossible for a non-martial artist to bear, covering the whole table with a single sweeping motion.

"I know you said you were tired of okonomiyaki for dinner... so, I prepared something... special... tonight," Ukyo declared, smiling in a sinister fashion before she swept away the various cases and covers.

The Kamikaze Pirates gaped at their 'special dinner'; a nightmarish spread of massive tarantulas, snakes, monkeys, grubs, brains, offal, and other, even less identifiable dishes.

Nabiki choked as her stomach recoiled at the sight she had been presented with, turning to the smirking Ukyo and feebly asking, "Y-You're not mad about what we said this morning, are you...?"

"Mad? Noooo, why would I be mad?" Ukyo asked sweetly, before continuing, "I've always wanted to try some more... exotic dishes, and today just felt like a good day to go with it."

Nabiki grimaced, looking queasily at the spread before her, asking shakily, "...Anyone else not hungry?"

"Oh, come on, Nabiki, where's your sense of adventure?" Miriam cheerfully asked, reaching down to pick up a platter of what looked like sliced fish. The wotan's grin faltered as she brought it near her face, her nose twitching before she recoiled in disgust, clamping the fingers of her free hand around her offended snout.

"Phew! Maybe not that adventurous! What is this stuff?!" she demanded, holding the foul-smelling ostensible food away from her aching nostrils.

"It looks to me like a local variant of hongeo-hoe; skate fermented in its own bile and urine," Kodachi placidly observed.

A nauseated grimace twisted Miriam's face into an expression of disgust, and she hastily put the plate down, well away from the rest of the food.

"...I'm not so hungry after all..." she declared shakily.

Ukyo grinned triumphantly to herself. 'That'll show 'em to appreciate what they got! I'll let 'em stew just a little longer, then I'll offer to make 'em a proper dinner... shame to waste food, but then, it's not like that was real food... right...?'

Her train of thought was derailed as she saw Ranma nonchalantly reach over and add a grilled giant tarantula to his plate. He pulled off one of the legs and proceeded to suck the meat out of it like it was a lobster tail.

"R-Ranchan?" a confused Ukyo hesitantly asked.

"Oooh, baked monkey! Shampoo not have this for ages!" Chirped the Chinese Amazon, who eagerly snatched up the disturbingly roast baby-like form and didn't even bother to use her utensils, instead biting into it like it was a spit-roasted haunch of meat.

"Pass me that poached lamb's brain, would you Harumi?" Kodachi asked mildly, causing the startled youth to jerk before he hastily complied. Once it was in front of her, Kodachi took up her knife and fork and delicately pared away a mouthful, which she consumed with evident relish.

"Mmm. Your first time cooking with brains, Ukyo? I must say, you have a knack, though I personally prefer them herb-crumbed and deep fried," Kodachi commented mildly, before taking another forkful.

"Okay, what's the joke here?!" a rather green Nabiki demanded.

'Glad you said it, not me,' Ukyo observed feebly, still staring at the sight of three of the crew tucking in with evident relish.

"Yer really surprised, Nabs? You remember I grew up on the road with pops, right? Hunting, foraging, scavenging... if you didn't eat what you could find, you went hungry! Snake, pigeon, rat, bugs, offal... I grew up on this stuff! Ryoga's the same, ain't'cha, buddy?" Ranma replied, finishing off his spider and adding some grilled grubs and rats to his plate.

"Yech! Yeah, I did, but that doesn't mean I liked it!" Ryoga sourly noted, staring at Ranma's plate in mingled irritation and disgust before his pride finally won out and he served himself some liver and onions.

"Is wise old saying in Shampoo's village; if something's back faces sky, is for peoples eating," interjected Shampoo, before she slurped up a grilled snake like a giant ramen noodle made of solid meat.

"And what's your excuse?!" Nabiki demanded of Kodachi.

The heiress daintily wiped her mouth with a napkin before she spoke. "The world of high cuisine contains many exotic delicacies, dearie. I may not consider it my primary diet, as it were, but I am familiar with or at least willing to sample anything."

She reached for the plate of hongeo-hoe, then recoiled as she brought it near and the full fury of its funk reached her nostrils.

"Well, almost anything," she mildly corrected herself, before putting the dish aside.

"C'mon, Nabs; give it a shot! You might like it!" Ranma told her, before wrenching a leg off of another spider and holding it out to the disgusted girl.

Nabiki recoiled, which in fairness was a rather reasonable reaction to being confronted with a spider leg that was a foot long and three inches across. She grimaced, staring daggers at the smiling face across from her, until her stomach growled loudly and reminded her that she was running on fumes after a hard day's training. With a sour look, she took it from Ranma and gingerly bit into the meaty fibers trailing from the sundered joint where it had once connected to the thorax. She gingerly gnawed a small sample off, chewing it, only to look surprised.

"It... tastes like lobster?" the baffled girl announced, before taking a second, somewhat more enthusiastic bite.

"Well, they're not really that far removed from each other, dearie," Kodachi commented.

"Issat true?" Miriam asked, brows furrowed in confusion.

"I always thought they tasted very similar, myself," Harumi conceded, having taken several of the oversized arachnids for his own meal. He offered one to the wotan, who took it before forefinger and thumb before tossing it into her mouth and devouring it whole.

"Hey, you're right!" Miriam announced cheerfully, now adding several more of the grilled arachnids to a platter already groaning with assorted offal dishes.

Ukyo looked around the table and her disastrous attempt at revenge, before she shrugged her shoulders and sat down.

'What's that Western saying? When in Rome?' she mused, even as she speared a morsel of hongeo-hoe and put it in her mouth.

Then she shuddered as the intensely strong fermented flavor molested her tongue, its ammonia-based funk curdling inside her nostrils like she'd just taken a mouthful of raw sewage. It took everything she had to swallow, but she bolted it down largely without chewing, unwilling to let it linger in her maw any longer than she had to.

'Yech! Scratch that off the bucket list!' She thought in disgust, shoving the plate aside and reaching for something a little more edible.

At the Opera Tonight

Shampoo took a deep, cleansing breath and slowly exhaled, fighting the urge to pace like a wild animal in front of the theater.

'Keep the faith, Sham Pu; Ranma promised that he would meet you here - this will not be like the Instant Nanniichuan incident! ...Ohh, but where are you, my darling? Please, do not keep me waiting much longer - I do not think my heart can bear it!'

"Yo, Shampoo!"

"Airen!" Shampoo squeaked in delight, whirling around in an attempt to locate the voice. When she spotted Ranma, who was casually waving, she squealed in delight and pounced forward with a mighty leap, unthinkingly shifting to hybrid form to ensure she sailed the distance and latched onto Ranma's waist from across the plaza.

"Whoa! Heh, eager little bunny, aren'tcha?" Ranma chuckled, and it said much about how things had changed since they began sailing together than he was only lightly blushing and his words were only slightly choked with nerves.

"Shampoo sorry... just, Shampoo no could stop remembering last time we go to theater," the Chinese Amazon sighed, nuzzling against her reluctant-to-commit mate as she spoke.

Ranma flinched at the memory. 'Oh... yeah, that was kind of a jerk thing to do... but I had to get that Nanniichuan and get back to help Akane! Still...'

"Yeah... I'm sorry, Shampoo, I shouldn't've done that," Ranma softly admitted. When Shampoo looked up at him, the adoration in her eyes made his traitorous heart skip a beat.

"Shampoo forgive you! This date be too-too much-much better!" she excitedly declared, giving him an extra squeeze for emphasis.

"Yeah... what're we gonna see, anyway?" Ranma asked, having allowed Shampoo to handle the arrangements.

"Airen no worry; is not stupid historical romance like last time. Shampoo no can believe was so stupid," she stuck a tongue out at the memory of the movie they had watched on that aborted attempt at a date.

'Not only was the subject matter far too close to home for the both of us, but the acting was atrocious, the dialogue was stilted, and it was simply one of the most boring movies I have ever had the misfortune to watch. I would have enjoyed a John Woo or Ringo Lam film far more... but alas, hindsight is always twenty-twenty. I have a golden opportunity to redeem my poor taste now!'

"Yeah, that movie sucked, but what are we watching today?" Ranma insisted.

"Is called 'The Pirates of Penzance'. Shampoo not sure what story is, but must be better than last story we see, no?" she smiled cutely, nuzzled Ranma again, and finally let him go.

"Yeah, sounds like it could be fun," Ranma admitted, and by this point he was smiling too at the Chinese Amazon's infectious enthusiasm. Watching other couples beginning to file into the theater, on a whim he offered Shampoo his elbow. The way her shocked expression gave one to absolute delight made his heart flutter yet again, the little traitor, but he stood his ground and let her link her arm with his before escorting her into the theater.

It's the Simple Things

The sun was shining, a gentle breeze kept things lovely and cool, and the birds were singing merrily. It was a glorious day, and the Shelzar city park was certainly the place to enjoy it, with shady paths to walk and abundant flower gardens that filled the air with sweet scents and bright colors.

Naturally, many couples were to be seen taking advantage of the lovely day, and one of those couples was Ranma and Ukyo, who were strolling along one of the more rugged paths, arm in arm and holding an icecream cone apiece.

Ranma licked at his softserve, savoring the rich, sweet creaminess that he had been denied for so long prior to arriving in Nerima. A sudden soft, gentle pressure against his shoulder made him look from the cone to his date; Ukyo was resting her head against him and sighing contentedly as she did so.

"You okay, Ucchan?" he asked softly.

"I'm fine, Ranchan," she purred blissfully in response.

"No, I mean... this ain't exactly the fanciest of dates," Ranma admitted, feeling a niggling pang of guilt that he hadn't been able to come up with something better for him and Ukyo to do.

"Ranchan... being here, like this, just the two of us? That's all I need," Ukyo declared firmly, never losing the blissful smile on her face.

"...You really mean that?" Ranma asked, unable to stop himself.

Ukyo simply nodded.

"There's nothing I could do to make this better?"

"Well, you could let me have a lick of your icecream... I finished mine already," Ukyo asked, grinning mischievously and then giggling at her own little joke. Then she stopped and stared as Ranma offered her the slightly dripping icecream, before she smiled and took a big lick.

The Winds of Freedom

Ranma leaned comfortably against a surprisingly smooth stone, settled happily into the warm sand, and watched as Kodachi danced for joy along the secluded stretch of beach she had led them to. Drawing upon all her gymnastics skills, she skipped, leapt, tumbled and twirled as if she were a feather being blown by the wind. She sprang from soft sand to balance atop the rocky shelves of a tidal pool and then somersaulted back to the sand once more, before dashing off to play amongst the shallow spray, kicking at the incoming waves for the sheer pleasure of watching the droplets glisten like diamonds in the sun.

'Wow, I never would have thought she could be this cute, not back in Nerima...'

He didn't have the time to really pursue that thought further as Kodachi came running over to him and grabbed his hands before trying to playfully pull him to his feet.

"Darling, come and dance with me!" she pleaded excitedly.

"Alright, alright, I'm comin'... gotta say, I wouldn't have thought this'd be your thing for a date, Kodachi," Ranma observed, even as he allowed her to 'drag' him to his feet.

"Oh, make no mistake, I fully enjoy and appreciate the many luxuries that wealth can provide! But the simple pleasures in life deserve appreciation too - to feel the wind in my hair, the sun on my skin, the salty spray on my lips is to remember that I am alive, and I am here with you... Why, it reminds me of why I love you to begin with; you are a breath of fresh air in the tired dullness of my staid and ordinary life," Kodachi proclaimed dramatically, sighing and momentarily swooning as she pictured her quote-unquote 'colorless schoolgirl life' back in Nerima.

"I was actually talkin' about us going to the beach for a date. Don't we already spend a lot of time on beaches?" Ranma pointed out, palpably amused.

"Oh. Well, yes, we do, but those times are always with all the others around. Here and now, I have you all to myself!" Kodachi asserted, pressing in close and placing a teasing kiss on Ranma's cheek, before suddenly springing away and starting to dash across the sand.

"Catch me if you can, my sweetest! Or are you too slow?" She called to him a playfully mocking tone, letting out one of her delighted cackles.

"I'll show you slow!" Ranma cried out in faux-outrage, giving chase.

Money, Money, Money!

Nabiki studied the dessert menu with the intensity of a lawyer going over their legal texts prior to a big case, then turned her attention from it to the waitress waiting on them both.

"I'll have this, this, this, and this. Triple portions, please," she politely informed her, pointing to her selections on the menu.

"T-Triple portions?!" the waitress stammered, looking in shock and no small amount of jealousy at the slender young girl sitting patiently in front of her. When she simply looked coolly back at her and gently nodded, the waitress quickly scribbled down her order on her notebook and bustled over to the cafe.

"You'll get fat, Nabs," Ranma playfully teased her, waving a finger in mock-reproach.

"Not likely, with how you've been working me," Nabiki scoffed in response.

"Seriously, I'll admit I had a bit of an appetite before all this nonsense, but I have never been so hungry as I've been since I took up your crazy exercise regimes! But as insane as my exercises are, yours are worse - I used to think you were a bit of a pig at home, but now I know what it's like, I have to know: how the heck do you not stuff your face like Goku from Dragon Ball at every meal?!" She demanded.

"Eh, the cravings get weaker as you get better at tapping your ki. It's kind of like you're a furnace that gets better at controlling the burn, I guess," Ranma replied flippantly.

"Well, I know the girls back at Furinkan High School used to be so jealous of how you kept your looks... I bet they wouldn't be so eager to know the secret if they knew just how much work it was," Nabiki observed.

Their conversation came to a brief close as the waitress returned with their orders, placing the plates on the table the two teens were sharing before briskly but politely taking her leave. As they both reached for their meals, Ranma spoke up.

"I gotta know... why are we here?" He asked, before taking a bite of the double-decker BLT sandwich he'd ordered.

"I felt like a nice leisurely brunch for our outing together," Nabiki shrugged, before taking a massive forkful of something that the menu had advertised as 'key lime pie' and squealing with delight as the sweet-yet-tart flavors washed over her tongue.

"No, I mean... why ask me on a date at all? I know the other girls said you had their permission to 'court me' an' all, but you don't have to take them seriously," Ranma elaborated, before taking some fries from his side-dish.

Nabiki gagged softly as a previously delicious mouthful of meringue and tart custardy filling turned into a lump of half-set concrete in her throat.

'...You could back out. Make a joke out of it, he'll buy that. You don't have to tell him anything...' A little voice metaphorically whispered in Nabiki's ear.

'But if you don't tell him, it'll never go anywhere. He won't treat this as bein real if you don't do the same...' She reminded herself.

She swallowed hard, the gesture both symbolic and practical, hating herself for the feeling of butterflies frantically dancing around her stomach.

"...Maybe I want to take them seriously," she finally declared. She tried to sound flippant, to act like her usual confident, slightly sarcastic self, but she could feel the tension buzzing under her skin like an electrical current.

Ranma had been about to bite into his sandwich again, but Nabiki's words caused it to slip out of his fingers and land back on his plate with a slightly damp sound. He stared at her, mouth still hanging half-open, before he finally seemed to realize it and asked her, simply, "What."

"Gee, thanks. I didn't realize you'd already decided about who you were picking," Nabiki retorted dryly,

"Wha-No! No, no! I mean... why?! Why would you wanna take this seriously? There's way better guys than me!" Ranma spluttered, clearly not firing on all cylinders at the moment.

Ironically, that obvious disarray actually calmed Nabiki's nerves a little, and she found herself falling into more familiar territory.

"For the inventor of the Moko Takabisha, you sure seem to have self-esteem issues," she quipped with a smirk.

"Me? As if!" Ranma protested immediately.

"To answer your question... you really aren't giving yourself enough credit. Oh, you have your faults, surely - you have the biggest ego this side of Tatewaki Kuno, just to start with," Nabiki observed.

"Hey!" came the indignant protest.

"But... you're capable of being surprisingly sweet when you want, you're actually a lot smarter than you act sometimes, you're certainly up there in the looks department, I know you'd have my back, and let's not forget you're one of the only guys I know who doesn't hate me..." Nabiki continued as if Ranma had never spoken, allowing a rare frown to cross her face as she recalled her less than sterling (albeit self-inflicted) reputation back in Nerima.

"Course I don't! I mean, yeah, I don't like when you use me, but you use everybody - it's not personal with you! I can't hate you for it," Ranma insisted.

Nabiki blinked in shock, a small smile spreading on her lips without her consent.

"You're such a sap... but I'd be lying if I said that wasn't one of your charms. If I'm being honest with myself... you're actually quite a catch. The worst thing about you used to be that you're not rich... but even there, I just wasn't thinking it through hard enough," she noted.

"...How so?" Ranma asked, morbidly curious.

"Well, even ignoring the fact we are likely to return home with enough gold and jewels that we will never have to worry about money for the rest of our lives? Do you know how much money you could make as a professional stuntman? Why, if we train you up as an actor too, you could be a huge movie star!" Nabiki explained, eyes growing starry as she pictured it.

"...You're really serious," Ranma declared softly.

"That's right, cutie. I know I'm starting late in this game... but, the way I see it, so are the rest of the girls. I'm not going to pretend I'm somebody I'm not... /but/, this isn't a game for me, either. Understand?" Nabiki declared, reaching across the table and tapping Ranma playfully on the nose.

Ranma looked overwhelmed for a second, but then, to Nabiki's surprise, he actually smiled faintly and nodded.

"Good boy. Now, eat up; today's my day with you, and I don't intend to let it go to waste," Nabiki declared, before pointedly taking another spoonful of key lime pie.

Somehow, it tasted even better than before.

Ryoga's Admirer

Ranma cursed incessantly in a low, conversational tone of voice as she hauled herself dripping wet up the Stormbringer's anchor chain.

"When I get my hands on that bacon-brained bimbo brute, I'm going to insert that umbrella of Ryoga's where the sun don't shine!" Ranma vowed to herself as she finally scrambled onto the deck.

"Honestly, just because I -"

"Um... excuse me?" interjected a soft, uncertain voice.

Ranma looked up, and found herself staring at a beautiful young girl about Ranma's age, with soft eyes and long hair of an attractive shade of dark green, save for the two pink streaks that flowed down her temples and were tucked in front of her ears. Weirdly, there was something about her facial features that reminded Ranma of Akane, albeit distantly.

"Yeah...? Can I help ya?" the boy-turned-girl cautiously asked.

The stranger visibly wilted, as if intimidated by the dripping form of Ranma.

"I'm sorry, I just... I'm looking for someone. A man named Ryoga Hibiki? I was told he's a crewman aboard this ship...?" she asked plaintively.

"Ryoga? Yeah, he's here. Why? What'cha want him for?" a confused Ranma asked.

"To thank him!" the stranger chirped, visibly brightening at Ranma's proclamation.

"He saved my life yesterday - I was on my way to the markets, when some muggers confronted me and tried to steal my belongings... I fear they may have wanted to do worse. But then... /he/ appeared. There were six of them, all very big men! But he defeated them as if they were nothing!" she added, eyes bright with excitement and hands curling into fists as she lost herself in her memory of the rescue.

"That's our Ryoga," Ranma chuckled approvingly.

"He was so kind and gentle with me afterward, asking if I was hurt... but then he left before I had a chance to thank him! I barely had the time to get his name," the strange girl sighed, shaking her head in dismay.

"I came here, hoping to properly thank him... but then I found he already had a girlfriend," she mournfully noted, looking dismayed - then shocked as Ranma suddenly and loudly retched.

"Are you okay?!" she asked in shock.

"Lady, I don't even know where ta begin ta tell ya how sick and wrong that idea is!" Ranma snarled, fighting back the nausea in her guts.

"You mean... you're not...?" the stranger asked tentatively, hope filling her voice.

"Even if I was inclined that way, which I ain't, I got four girlfriends who'd have somethin' ta say about that! Ryoga's just a crewmate - barely that!" Ranma snapped, previous charitable mood about his old friend-turned-rival having evaporated.

"Y-you mean -!?" the startled girl began.

"You want to go on a date with the jerk? Go right ahead! Hang on a moment... RYOGA!" Ranma suddenly bellowed at the top of her lungs, making the poor girl nearly jump out of her skin. "Ryoga, get up here right now!"

Moments later, Ryoga arrived, a rare cocky smirk spread across his lips. "What's wrong, Ranma? Haven't had enough yet?"

"There you are, Ryoga. Get dressed in something nice, you're taking this young lady on a date," Ranma ordered, jabbing a thumb in the blushing stranger's direction as she did.

That knocked the wind out of Ryoga's sails certainly enough. Especially when Ranma suddenly grabbed him and pushed him across the deck; he caught himself before he fell, but he found the girl latching onto his arm like a limpet and looking up at him with adoring eyes.

"Wait, what?! Ranma, what's going on here? Ranma!" He cried, even as Ranma turned and walked away, grinning to herself at Ryoga's plaintive yet confused cries.

One Month Since Arriving...

"Weigh anchor! Unfurl the sail! The One Piece isn't gonna wait around forever!" Ranma shouted jubilantly.

The sun was shining bright and golden in a blue sky that was clear save for an almost artisanal smattering of fluffy white clouds. The winds blew strong and steady, the Stormbringer's sails catching them hungrily and its Jolly Roger billowing proudly as the Kamikaze Pirates sailed triumphantly out of Shelzar's port waters.

Chapter End & Closing Notes

Not gonna lie, I'm worried about this one. I don't have a lot of experience with training montages, but I hope this was at least mildly entertaining. Our heroes are going to appreciate that down time when they see what comes next...

As always, there's a TVtropes page for this fic begging for additions, and if you want to help me with my mission to get more art for this fic - I really want to get something for each of the crewmembers, not just the OCs - then donations at my Kofi or suggestions of potentially interested artists would be greatly appreciated! Heck, I still need some help replacing this dying computer...