Author's Notes: Thank you all for the high praise for the previous chapter! I probably won't do many "vignette" chapters in this story, but it's nice to know that you enjoyed it all the same.

In other welcome news, we have two new pieces of artwork for this fic; check 'em out on SpaceBattles! One is technically a spoiler, but I kind of spoiled this one a few chapters back. As for when it'll become canon? Let's just say... three.

To those who expressed dismay at not getting to see Ace interacting with the Kamikaze Pirates, I'll admit I ran out of inspiration there. But, if there's a real desire for it... I've been considering doing a spin-off story just to house "canon omakes" and vignettes. If I go through with it, that'll be where it ends up; I just need to know there's an audience for it!

Thatoneguy; in Akane's defense, she's always been in the relative safety (luxury) of Nerima, where she can live perfectly happy as just a normal girl who happens to be a little stronger than average. Nabiki, on the other hand, is in a place where her only options are literally "get good or DIE". That kind of incentive tends to reshuffle one's priorities a little, no?

As always, there's a TVTropes page for this fic begging for additions, and if you want to help me get more arts for this fic, I have a KoFi page where you can drop me some funding. The dole only goes so far, alas.

Chapter 23: All's Fair in Love, War, and Davy Back Fights! Part 1!

The sun was shining brightly, with just enough cloud cover and winds to keep the heat from being oppressive. Ranma stretched his arms above his head, cracking his neck in the process, and sighed loudly.

"Well, this's been a dull week," he observed as he and the rest of the Kamikaze Pirates made their way through the marketplace of the small island community they had docked at to resupply their more quickly used or otherwise perishable goods.

"Gee, I didn't realize you found us such poor company," Nabiki quipped, the smirk on her lips belying the dry tone of her snarky comment.

"It's not that!" Ranma protested instinctively.

"I understand where Ranma darling is coming from; we spent a long, grueling month honing our talents... and in the last week, we have had no opportunities to test our newfound might! No Marine patrols, no rival pirate crews, not even any sea monsters... I too itch for the chance to prove my mettle!" Kodachi passionately proclaimed, hands curling into fists and a metaphorical fire burning in her eyes.

"Shampoo agree - best part of completing training is see how far you come in real fight!" the zoan chirped, fist momentarily blurring from existence as she launched a hyper-speed volley of fake punches.

"Ranma Saotome, Captain of ze Kamikaze Pirates! I, Captain Foxy of ze Foxy Pirates, challenge you to a Davy Back Fight!"

As one, the entirety of the Kamikaze Pirates crew turned to look at Ranma, Kodachi and Shampoo. Ranma gave them a somewhat sheepish grin in response, but the two girls stared defiantly back. Then, as one, they turned to face their would-be challenger.

Standing before them was a small band of three. A man whom fate had unkindly endowed with the build and general appearance of a gorilla that somebody had shaved bald. A young woman, quite pretty even if her nose was a little too big and pointy. And, finally, standing between the other two, an older man; short, round-bellied, with a perpetually crooked smile and a long, red, oft-broken nose, as well as black hair greased up into twin tufts that vaguely resembled fox's ears, if you squinted at it.

As Ranma stared, his mind raced. 'Who is this clown, and what's a Davy Back Fight...? Oh. Oh, now I remember. Who'da thunk we'd run into him ourselves? I thought those guys were just being overdramatic!'

"Captain Saotome? What is this...'Davy Back Fight'?" Dyna interjected, her head twisting to allow her single eye to take in the opposing group.

"It's a pirate tradition of ritual combat," Ranma answered, not looking back at her as he spoke, gaze fixed on the rival pirates.

His words made Dyna pop her chainsaw out and level her gun at the group, causing bystanders to start fleeing for cover, but the opposing pirate captain simply burst out laughing.

"Fehfehfehfeh! Don't be so dramatic, kid! The Davy Back Fight is a serious business, sure, but it's still just a game!" Foxy cackled.

"But you obviously know who I am! But of course you do - I'm Foxy the Silver Fox, ze King of ze Davy Back Fights! I have a streak of 920 victories! Fehfehfehfeh!"

"And one loss," interjected the gorilla-man, who began to chuckle to himself even as Foxy suddenly fell to his hands and knees, face wracked with despair.

"Ohh, my poor victory streak... zose stupid Straw Hats!" Foxy moaned, tears visibly running down his long red nose and dripping to the paving.

"Boss!" cried the young woman, who hastily kneeled down beside her weeping captain and slung a comforting arm over his shoulders.

"Hamburg, you jerk! Why would you tease our poor boss like that?!" she angrily demanded, glaring fiercely up at the still-snickering gorilla-man.

Ranma gingerly reached up and rubbed the back of his head, feeling more than a little awkward at the sight.

"Wow... Okay, now I feel bad that I was gonna say yes," he muttered.

"Ahah! I heard zat! No take backs!" Foxy cried in delight, leaping to his feet and jabbing a finger at Ranma, a mocking grin spread wide across his face.

"Wow, he sure got better quickly," Nabiki dryly quipped.

"So what's it gonna be, Captain Saotome?! Will you accept my challenge? Or will you turn tail and run, like a coward!?" The older pirate captain jeered.

"Ranma Saotome is no coward! I accept your challenge!" Ranma barked, stabbing a finger in Foxy's direction in turn.

Then he stopped and crossed his arms, muttering, "'Sides, it'd be nice to have a little bit of home again..."

Foxy gaped at him, visibly dumbfounded. "Eh?! What are you talking about?"

Now it was Ranma's turn to flash an evil grin. "You wouldn't know this, but before we turned to piracy, I and most of my crew came from a little place called Nerima Island. It's an island devoted to martial arts, with hundreds of schools that've turned everyday hobbies, sports, and games into deadly combat styles! I am the heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts, the style of all styles!"

"Really now...?" Foxy asked, just a hint of skepticism in his tone.

"Don't take me lightly because of my age! I defeated the La Belle France School of Martial Arts Dining, the Daimonji Orthodox School of Martial Arts Tea Ceremony, and the Miyako-oji Unorthodox School of Martial Arts Tea Ceremony too! I've crushed practitioners of Bathhouse Fu and Battle Shogi! I kicked the asses of the Golden Pair of Martial Arts Couple's Ice Skating! I've taken on Nyuchiezu Wu Shu and Hidden Weapons Styles, beat Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnasts at their own game, and creamed a master of Martial Arts Cheerleading! I don't care what kind of crazy games you think you've got up your sleeve; I can take anything you can throw out!" Ranma crowed, arms crossed across his chest.

"He's making up at least half of those styles, right?" Harumi asked Nabiki.

"Nope. He may not be the most modest of guys, but he's no liar... at least, not when it comes to his victories," the (technically) heiress to the Tendo School of Anything Goes explained, smiling fondly despite herself.

The woman and Hamburg were staring at Ranma in visible disbelief, but Foxy tossed back his head and bellowed with laughter.

"Fehfehfehfehfeh! You got ze guts, kid - now let's see if zey'll give you ze glory! If you accept ze Davy Back Fight, then let's make it official - fire a shot into the air to signal the start of the games!" The older captain declared, triumphantly snatching a pistol that had been visibly tucked into his belt, exposed thanks to his lack of shirt and open jacket, and thrust it skyward.

Smirking, Ranma never took his eyes off of Foxy, but instead held his hand out, palm facing towards his crewmates. Quick as a whip, Kodachi snatched her own pistol from its usual point of pride at her hip and sent it spinning through the air to slap meatily into Ranma's palm, the martial artist turned pirate captain catching it without a need to look her way. A dexterous twist of the wrist, and he too was pointing the weapon skyward.

Twin shots rang out, the sharp crack of gunfire echoing through the now-still marketplace as both captains slowly lowered their weapons.

"So, what now? We gonna fight here?" Ranma asked patiently.

"Don't be stupid, this place is totally unsuitable for a Davy Back Fight! My ship is anchored off a beach on the southeast end of this island - we'll hold the Davy Back Fight there!" Foxy retorted.

"Sounds good to me - we'll be there!" Ranma shot back.

Foxy simply laughed, then spun on his heel and stalked away, his two underlings following close behind. Once they were gone, Ranma turned to his crew.

"Are you really sure about this, Ranma? You do know we've got to give up members of the crew if we lose!" Ryoga pointed out.

"Yeah, I know - but I know we can beat him. C'mon, we're us! We've seen all kinds of weird fighting styles back home - admittedly, I've probably seen more than any of you, but still, you're not slouches! How hard can it be to beat a bunch of pirates who rely on silly games to expand their crew?" Ranma asked sincerely.

"I don't know, I'm kind of with Ryoga here," Nabiki commented.

"Oh, have some faith in your captain - he won't steer us wrong!" Miriam interjected, slapping her thigh in approval.

"I will concede to being worried myself - what will we do when we win?" Kodachi asked.

"Well, let's see what kind of crew he's willing to offer us. Maybe we'll find somebody who actually wants to come with us! If not, we'll give whoever we pick the choice to go back to Foxy's crew - we don't need to force anybody to come with us," Ranma declared decisively, earning a nod of agreement from the rest of them.

Several hours later...

"Wow... these guys really take this game seriously!" Ranma whistled in admiration, taking in the scene before him. What had previously been an unremarkable stretch of forested coastline, the kind of place where fisherman would weigh anchor for a spot of idle fishing or pull ashore to enjoy their lunch before heading home, was now a bustling semi-carnival, as the hundreds of Foxy Pirates had erected a small stage, carnival streamers, and various stalls, many of them now selling food stuffs and souvenirs to their fellow crewmates or to those locals who had been brave and/or curious enough to venture to this part of the island.

"Get'cher okonomiyaki here!"

Mind you, the Foxy Pirates weren't the only ones trying to turn a little side profit...

An amused smile on his face, Ranma followed the familiar voice, finding Ukyo manning hastily assembled yattai, which had already drawn a small crowd. Including one of her crewmates.

"I can't believe you'd do something like this! Those were our supplies!" Nabiki complained loudly.

"Oh, come on, Nabiki, where's your taste for profit? We're making a bundle back!" Ukyo cheerfully chided her, eyes closed and smiling even as she deftly continued to flip and pour okonomiyaki on the small grill she'd thrown together.

The Kamikaze Pirates' quartermaster growled loudly, only to be cut off by a now-familiar cackle.

"Fehfehfehfeh! You should listen to the young lady - besides, it's no good for you to get so stressed out, you're too young and pretty to have a heart attack! I'll have the katsuobushi, the seafood deluxe toppings, crunchy noodles, and some aonori, please!" Foxy said, addressing this last part to Ukyo.

"Coming right up!" Ukyo chirped, hands blurring as she mixed cabbage, batter and the requested toppings into a flat mass of dough spread on the grill. The scorching heat soon had a crispy, golden-brown disk that she deftly flipped onto a cheap dish and passed over to the rival captain, who dug in heartily.

"Oh! Mmm, that's good! You're a wiz with a flattop!" Foxy gushed, rapidly devouring his order.

"But of course! I'm not the Stormbringer's chef for nothing!" the beaming young girl responded proudly.

"Yeah, we'd be lost without'cha, Ucchan," Ranma interjected, causing her to turn her delighted grin towards him.

"Ah! Captain Saotome! You have a charming young crewmate here," Foxy declared, devouring the last of his okonomiyaki.

"Yeah, my crewmates are all one of a kind," Ranma bragged.

Sudden, fireworks went whistling into the sky to explode like artificial thunderclaps, causing Ranma and the rest of the Kamikazes, even Dyna, to crane their heads upwards at the curious sight.

"Ahah! That's the signal, kid; c'mon, you and I need to get to the stage - it's time for the opening ceremony," Foxy said, standing up, slapping down some bills to pay for his food, and striding off at a surprising pace for somebody who looked like he did, with Ranma hurrying after him.

Shortly thereafter...

The air practically crackled with excitement as the Kamikaze Pirates waited on the edge of the gathered crowd, watching the figures on the stage; Ranma and Foxy sitting on a pair of simple stools, whilst the young woman who had accompanied Foxy at the marketplace stood in front of a Transponder Snail microphone.

"Welcome, one and all! Before we begin, let's review the three rules of the Davy Back Fight!" the woman - Porche, going by the names called out by her excited male crewmates - cheerfully announced.

"First of all; anything you lose in a match of a Davy Back Fight can only be won by in another Davy Back Fight match! It doesn't matter if it's a crewmate, your Jolly Roger, or anything else the winning captain decides to take; you lose it in a match, you need to win it back in a match!"

"Secondly; any crew won in a match must swear allegiance to their new captain on the spot! Unless your old crew wins you back, you belong to them now!"

"Finally; if your Jolly Roger is taken, you can never, ever fly it again!"

"Breaking any of these rules will result in you being scorned as a disgrace to all true pirates, who will be honorbound to send you personally down to Davy Jones' Locker! Do both captains swear to abide by these rules?" Porche asked, turning to Ranma and Foxy.

The two captains surged to their feet as one and shouted, "I swear!" to cheers of excited joy from all onlookers.

Foxy then turned his head to face Ranma, his ever-present smirking grin on his face as he held up his right hand, three coins held between his splayed fingers. "Alright, kid, I'll be generous; what'll it be? One coin, two coins, or three coins? Your call!"

"Uh...?" Ranma blinked, mind going blank as he tried desperately to remember what this was about. Fortunately, Porche intervened.

"Isn't our Captain Foxy so generous?! For the unfamiliar, a Davy Back Fight begins by ceremonially offering coins to Davy Jones; one coin for each match! A Fight traditionally consists of one to three matches, and our wonderful Captain Foxy is offering Captain Saotome the right to choose how many we'll have!" she boasted, eliciting cheers from the massive crew of the Foxy Pirates.

'Okay, that explains that, but how many should I pick? One is safest, sure, but that means if we do lose, we can't win them back...' Mind racing, Ranma turned his gaze from Foxy to his crewmates.

"...Why is he looking at us? Isn't he going to just charge ahead anyway?" Ryoga asked, bitterness underlying his words.

"Obviously, he values our input!" Kodachi sniffed.

"One game would probably be the safest..." Nabiki observed.

"Bah, where's your guts? You really think we can't take these losers on? I say three games!" Miriam declared proudly.

"...I second Miriam's vote," Harumi quietly interjected.

"Any number of matches is risky. Presuming a base fifty percent chance of victory in a given match..." Dyna began to observe.

"Well, I stand with Ranchan any time - I say we go for three games," Ukyo declared.

"Shampoo agree!"

"Well, Ranma does have a track record of coming back from defeat to claim victory... I guess three matches works best for him," Ryoga grudgingly conceded.

"Then it's settled; three matches it is!" Kodachi let out one of her laughs, causing the Foxy Pirates nearby to flinch back, before she and the other Kamikazes raised their hands, three fingers held high.

Ranma took in the sight, nodded, and then held out three fingers for Foxy to see as well. "I'll fight three matches!"

"Fehfehfehfehfeh! You got guts, kid! Very well, it's settled! Three coins, three games, orthodox style rules! Let Davy Jones be our witness!" Foxy bellowed, tossing the coins up slightly before catching them in his palm, then sending them flying with a massive throw that sent them arcing all the way over and beyond the massive, battleship-like form of his ship to splash down into the waves beyond, an act that wrought a mighty cheer from the watching Foxy Pirates.

"Wow, nice throw!" Ranma observed, genuinely impressed.

"Feh, it was nothing," Foxy replied in that strangely accented voice of his, although the sparkle in his eyes and the widening of his grin suggested that the comment had touched him all the same.

"Here, you need this before you go back to your crew," he added, pulling a piece of paper from the inside of his coat and holding it to the younger captain.

A bemused Ranma accepted the paper and looked it over in confusion. "What's this?"

"Your team roster! You and your crew need to decide who's competing in each game, then give this to my party organizer, Itomimizu. A given crewmember can only compete in two games, maximum, and once you pick your lineup, that's it, no take backs!" Foxy explained, wagging a finger in warning.

"Oh, okay. Thanks," Ranma said, before calmly walking over to the edge of the stage and then making one of his massive leaps, soaring high over the Foxy Pirates, touching down briefly atop one startled pirate's head midway towards his goal; the unmistakable cluster of his own crew on the periphery of the crowd.

"Welcome back. So, what're we looking at?" Nabiki asked him as soon as he'd landed.

Ranma held out the sheet, and the rest of his crew crowded around to look at it.

"Not much here - just names and team size limits," Ukyo observed.

"Yeah... Spider Sky Walk; three people. Hit and Dead Ball; up to the whole crew. And Captain's Match; 1 person," Ryoga noted.

"How're we supposed to know who to submit for a given event if we don't know what they are?" Miriam complained.

"I suspect that we're being cheated," Nabiki darkly observed.

"It's a competition amongst pirates, created by pirates, for pirates; I'd be shocked to hear that cheating isn't part of the rules," Ranma replied absently. "But it don't matter, because we're not some wet-behind-the-ears new fish who just started sailing!"

"Captain darling is right; it's simply a matter of putting our minds and our wills to the work! Now, this Spider Sky Walk... from the title, I suspect it involves climbing in some fashion..." Kodachi mused thoughtfully.

"Yeah, that makes sense... Well, you an' Shamps are obvious choices for a game like that, 'dachi. But who else...?" Ranma asked.

"Probably best we keep you in reserve, Ranchan - you're our best fighter as well as our captain, after all," Ukyo interjected.

"...I guess that makes sense," Ranma conceded. "But who... what about Miriam?"

"Me?" the startled wotan asked.

"Yeah! You've got the height advantage, and if nothing else, you can get Shamps 'n' 'dachi closer to the end with a good throw," Ranma explained.

Miriam grimaced, but finally nodded. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense..."

"Alright! Now, Hit & Dead Ball... obviously, this is some kinda ball game... but what? Probably best we all enter; you can just count on Foxy putting in all his guys, and they outnumber us, even if they are mostly weaklings - best to maximize our own offense," Ranma proclaimed, eliciting nods and a chorus of agreement.

"Alright, that just leaves this Captain's Match... obviously, that's a one on one fight, so I'll put myself down for that," Ranma proclaimed, scrawling his own name in the entrant's slot of the paper.

"Alright, we're all set! Now, where's that Itomimizu guy...?"

And so...

"Welcome, one and all, to the Davy Back Fight! I am Itomimizu, the Foxy Pirates' party organizer and MC, and it is my sincere pleasure to be your host today! Not only am I the master of events, but with the aid of my loyal companion, the rare South Blue Super Sparrow Chirpchirp, I will be your commentator in these events!"

Raucous cheering greeted the spindly man's words, making his ever-present toothy grin grow even larger as he puffed out his chest in pride, his avian partner waving a wing in recognition of the praise.

"But enough about me - let's introduce the events! Today, the Foxy Pirates will be facing off against the Kamikaze Pirates - a bold name for a bold crew! Give them all a big hand, everybody!"

Amazingly, the Foxy Pirates actually did as they were told, eliciting grins from most of the Kamikazes and even some waves from Ranma and Kodachi.

"For our first round, we have the Spider Sky Walk, with the team of Kodachi Kuno, Shampoo, and Miriam Ransdottir!"

Kodachi laughed, making every non-crewmate in earshot wince, and blew a kiss. Shampoo smirked and bounced up and down a few times, shifting from demibeast to half-beast and back again. Miriam simply cracked her neck and then her knuckles, the sounds echoing like gunshots.

"For our second round, we have Hit and Dead Ball, with the entire Kamikaze Pirates crew competing!"

Ryoga stood tall and silent, trying to look stoic, whilst Ukyo and Harumi both gave meek smiles and waves to the assembled onlookers. Nabiki stared coolly at those around her, whilst Ranma gave a devil-may-care grin.

"Finally, we'll finish the match with a Captain's Match; Captain Foxy of the Foxy Pirates vs. Captain Ranma Saotome of the Kamikaze Pirates! Who will be victorious? Only Davy Jones knows for sure!"

Itomimizu promptly straddled the back of his avian steed, which spread its wings and, chirping loudly, flew high into the sky.

"And now, without further ado, follow me on Chirpchirp to the starting line of our first game; the Spider Sky Walk!"

The sparrow-riding commentator promptly began to fly away, with the assembled pirates and local onlookers trekking after him. Within a few minutes, they had reached the forest on the inland side of the makeshift festival grounds, and the Kamikazes pushed their way to the front of the crowd to take in the sight before them.

Right before them, just before the treeline, was the traditional starting point; two poles linked by a banner held high enough that even Miriam would have only had to duck her head to fit beneath it. On the other side of the starting line was a set of six rope ladders, which led up into the canopy. There, six platforms served as springboards for a veritable spider web of ropes that stretched off forward into the distance as far as the eye could see.

Miriam's face fell like a stone. "Oh, no... don't tell me..."

"Now it's time for a race with a difference; the Spider Sky Walk! Stretching up to a mile away from us is a complicated labyrinth of ropes erected by the Foxy Pirates' riggers; whoever reaches the end goal at the far end first, wins the match! The catch? You gotta run the entire course on the ropes! If you fall off, or if you touch the platforms used as anchor-points, you're outta the race!"

A scowling shark-girl stamped her foot, creating a localized earth tremor that knocked some of the closer Foxy Pirates clean off of their feet.

"Hey, buddy, what about me?! Do I look like a sea monkey to you? There's no way those ropes'll hold me!" She roared at the circling commentator.

"Normally, I'd defend the honor and skills of the Foxy Pirates' riggers and ropewrights... but I have to agree that they probably wouldn't hold you."

"So what are we supposed to do, then? If I can't run the ropes, somebody'll have to take my place!" Miriam protested.

"Ah-ah-ah! Remember the rules! No substitutions or exchanges allowed once you set your initial team limits! Your team will just have to compete without you!"

"But that puts us a man down!" Miriam roared, stamping her foot and cratering the earth, knocking the nearest Foxy Pirates flying again.

"Tough! That's the rules!"

Miriam gnashed her fangs, and looked furious, causing Ranma to reach out and gently pat her leg.

"Hey, it's alright - we made a gamble, and it didn't pay out. Don't worry; Kodachi and Shampoo can handle this," he assured her.

"Yeah, I know they can... I'm sorry, captain," the wotan sighed.

"Wasn't your fault," Ranma insisted.

"Now that's out of the way, will the participants please advance to the starting line?"

Kodachi and Shampoo threw brief commiserating looks in Miriam's direction, and then walked over to the starting line, Shampoo shifting into her half-beast form as she did. Then, from the teeming ranks of the Foxy Pirates, a single figure emerged; huge, hulking, apeish.

"In this round, representing the Kamikaze Pirates; Kodachi Kuno and Shampoo, with the latter having a thirty five million bounty! And representing the Foxy Pirates... it's our beloved third-in-command, Hamburg! And... wow, he's alone! Our boss Foxy must be feeling extra-confident if he's just sending out one man - this means that even with their unfortunate choice of roster, the Kamikaze Pirates will still have a two-to-one advantage!"

Ranma narrowed his eyes at the snickering gorilla of a man, lip curling as he sidled over to Kodachi and Shampoo.

"I don't trust this - they're up to something. You two keep on your toes," he whispered to them, with both nodding in response.

"Is everybody ready?! On your marks! Get set! ...GO!"

A gunshot rang out from high above, and the three competitors exploded into action. Kodachi soared gracefully into the air and grabbed the rope, shimmying up it with the speed and dexterity of a spider. Shampoo didn't even need the rope; her Zoan-charged rabbit-like legs propelled her into the air like she was launched from a cannon, landing neatly on one of the ropes weaving its crazy cat's cradle through the undercanopy. The two girls shot off, running along the ropes as if they were concrete causeways, seemingly oblivious to the great height they were above the ground.

But their lead wasn't as great as their crewmates might have hoped; despite his hulking size, Hamburg moved with surprising speed, clambering up the rope like the ape he resembled. When he reached the top, he continued his primate-like behavior by falling to all fours, his overly long arms and weirdly short legs enabling him to move about easily in this quadrupedal stance. This allowed him to employ his hands to further steady himself on the rope, and so he proceeded to almost literally gallop along the ropeways.

"Big ape right behind us!" Shampoo announced to her crewmate.

"So what? Between us, we have this in the bag!" Kodachi boasted to her.

And that was when the rope she was sprinting along suddenly broke right underneath her foot, sending her tumbling towards the ground with a screech of surprise.

"Kodachi!" Shampoo called, pulling to a stop instinctively, mind racing as she tried to figure out how to rescue her crewmate without being disqualified in the process.

"Extend!"

Even as she cried out, Kodachi reached for her waist and snatched forth her new sword, drawing the blade and thrusting it vigorously in the direction of a particularly solid tree-branch higher than the lowest level of the ropes. Simultaneously, her fingers hit a concealed trigger in the sword's handle. The result was that what had previously seemed to be a solid-bladed Western-style double-bladed sword suddenly exploded, transforming into a spool of fine yet durable chain whose outermost edges were fitted with razor sharp blade fragments.

It hissed forward like a chain-spear and embedded its tip deep into weathered hardwood. Another deft twitch of Kodachi's fingers, and a lightweight yet surprisingly strong engine in her handle exploded into life, retracting the chain and sending her rocketing back upwards. Kodachi deftly rode the momentum of this makeshift grapnel, and with a tug of her wrist dislodged the blade's tip from its wooden sheath at the apex of her jump, deftly flipping forward to land on an intact rope with the poise of a ballerina.

"Kodachi, you is okay!" Shampoo cheered.

'Strange... since when do I care how she fares in battle?' The Chinese Amazon wondered to herself.

Kodachi simply smirked and brushed a stray lock of hair from her face. "But of course! It takes more than a mere broken rope to take take down Kodachi Kuno!"

"Amazing! Kodachi Kuno nearly takes a spectacular fall, only to save herself at the last moment with an incredible display of acrobatics, steely will, and a very unusual weapon! But whilst she and Shampoo share sisterly solidarity, our own Hamburg has stolen the lead!"

"What?!" the two girls bellowed in outraged unison. Sure enough, when they looked ahead, Hamburg was noticeably ahead of them, and gaining speed as he made his four-legged gallop over the ropes.

"Ito, you idiot! You and your big mouth!" Cursed Foxy, audible even from this distance.

"Come back here!" Roared the two outraged teen girls as they sped after their foe.

Shampoo and Kodachi were a vision in motion, a living paen to speed and grace. Kodachi, honed by her mastery of Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics, practically danced through the branches, effortlessly hopping from line to line, even sliding along it whilst ducking and weaving around obtrusive tree branches without losing any momentum. As for Shampoo, well, her martial arts training combined with the bestial infusion of rabbit leg muscles and feline agility made for a killer combo. She made impossibly huge leaps, soaring confidently over expanses where the slightest failure would have sent her tumbling to end up as a broken wreck on the forest floor. They easily caught up to Hamburg, and then they blew past him, leaping and running and even swinging from loose ropes as they ran for the goal.

"And the Kamikaze Pirates make a surprising come from behind, easily catching up to and surpassing our own Hamburg, who gives it his all, but just can't move as quickly as these two! Who would have guessed two cute little girls would be so at home in the trees as this?!"

"You ain't seen nothing yet!" Shampoo crowed triumphantly, reaching out to grab a rope as part of ducking under it...

Only to find her hand refusing to come away.

"What-?! Is glue!" she screeched in outrage. It only held her for as long as it took for her to extend the claws on her other hand and slice through the rope on either side, with it posing as much resistance as cottage cheese, but that was still enough to disrupt her flow and give Hamburg a chance to power past her.

Kodachi, meanwhile, found herself similarly disadvantaged when her recently sharpened sense of intuition suddenly screamed at her. A small object - a stone, possibly - came flying through the air from somewhere in the undergrowth below at concussion-inducing speeds, and Kodachi instinctively dodged it. But that was only the first in a veritable barrage of rocks, sticks and even the occasional knife that came rocketing up towards the heiress turned pirate, forcing her to twist, dodge and leap to evade it all. Her wrathful eyes fell upon the source - easily a dozen or two men now emerged from the dense cover below, and her lovely visage curled into a fiendish glower.

"Insolent wretches! You dare to launch such an assault on my personage? Roses of Hell!"

With a defiant twirl, she withdrew about half a dozen of her trademark rose darts, these bearing black-streaked crimson petals, and hurled them into the underbrush. None struck a single foe, but instead buried themselves into the earth, eliciting mocking jeers from her assailants.

Which was when the tiny but potent vials filled with a particularly noxious and oxygen-reactive cocktail of chemicals, concealed in the heart of each blossom and now broken by the impact, detonated in a series of rolling explosions, spraying flames that burned with a distinctly voluminous, dense and toxic smoke through the underbrush. The air was filled with shrieks of fright and agony as Kodachi's former assailants found themselves caught in a flash inferno. Caustic fumes and tongues of flame seared the skin and choked the breath, sending the obvious members of the Foxy Pirates scattering like roaches to avoid being roasted or smothered on the spot.

"That a new move!" Shampoo noted approvingly.

"Just something I concocted to add a little more punch to my old rose bombs," Kodachi explained, laughing gleefully.

"Now, let us hurry! Those chemicals will burn themselves out momentarily, but we must hasten to overcome that cursed gorilla!" She declared, before the two shot forward once more.

"What an upset! Kodachi Kuno responds to the presence of obstacles in her path by simply burning her way through them! What kind of diabolic mind is she hiding behind that beautiful veneer?!"

"Buddy, you don't know the half of it," Ranma couldn't resist declaring in response to Itomimizu's commentary, but he was smiling as he said it.

Whilst Kodachi's methods of retaliation had been somewhat...drastic... they did at least suffice to scare away any other members of Foxy's crew who might try a similar stunt. Unfortunately, that was far from the only way in which the Foxy Pirates had attempted to rig the game in their favor. The course was littered with booby traps of all shapes and sizes; sabotaged ropes, patches of glue and oil, triggers for swinging weights and even a few rigged pistols. None of these stopped Kodachi and Shampoo, but they did succeed at slowing them down, allowing Hamburg to retain a small but uncontestable lead... especially since he never seemed to trigger any of the traps!

Still, they persevered, and soon enough, the finish line was in sight, only meters ahead!

"It's been a hell of a race, folks! Kodachi and Shampoo of the Kamikaze Pirates have run the gauntlet and emerged all but unscathed, but Hamburg of the Foxy Pirates is narrowly in the lead! It's the home stretch now - who will be victorious?!"

"Obviously, it will be us!" Kodachi cried, forward flipping as the rope she had stepped on triggered two logs to come swinging in, her momentum carrying her through the space where they would have caught the average contestant in a devastating pincer attack. The logs slammed into each other and smashed to pieces, Kodachi permitting herself a smirk as she gracefully landed on another rope...

Which suddenly sprang to life around her, a previously innocuous-seeming tangle of ropes revealing themselves as a carefully prepared upwards-snatching net trap!

"What? Hey! You dare?!" Kodachi squawked in protest, writhing and thrashing, but it was no good; as strong as she was, the ropes were thick and tough, and had her trapped in a position where she couldn't really get the leverage to even think of trying to rip her way free.

"Kodachi!" Shampoo cried, pirouetting to face her.

"Forget about me - win the race! That's what matters!" Kodachi cried.

Shampoo hesitated for a moment, then nodded and charged forward, vaulting over Hamburg in a mighty leap that carried her cleanly over his head; one more such leap, and she'd have crossed the finish line...!

And then the ropes she had landed on, displaced by her weight even despite her martial arts training, joggled the branches, dislodging not one, not two, but three massive hives full of very angry bees!

The huge swarm of venomous insects descended on Shampoo in a thick black cloud of buzzing doom. The zoan yowled in dismay, claws flicking out as she instinctively defended herself. Amaguriken-honed speed saw her claws scything out in deadly arcs faster than the eye could see that obliterated hundreds of bees at a stroke. But for every bee that was sliced apart, it seemed a hundred more took its place. She writhed and twisted, leaping from rope to rope, desperately angling herself to try and keep the stings from her tender flesh... but, as Ranma had learned before her, there was a difference between mere speed of hand and speed of reflexes. She yelped and squealed as she was stung over and over, the pain goading her to vicious raking blows that tore the very wind, cutting branches and ropes around her and finally dropping her to the ground below.

Fortunately, her combined zoan attributes mixed with her martial arts training let her land safely on the forest floor. And, as a bonus, that seemed to have been the last straw for the decimated swarm, which flew away to greener pastures. But that was sore comfort indeed to the heavily stung Chinese Amazon, especially when she heard...

"And we have a winner! Thanks to an incredible bout of bad luck right at the finish line, the Kamikaze Pirates lose - Hamburg takes the win!"

Ignoring the protests from her venom-wracked flesh, Shampoo craned her neck to look up at Kodachi. Both girls shared a look of mirrored dismay and misery, before hanging their heads in shame.

Moments later...

"Oh, Shampoo..." Ranma mournfully observed, taking in the sting-ravaged form of his long-unwanted Chinese fiancee, already covered in welts and blisters from the many, many close encounters she'd been unfortunate enough to have with those angry bees.

"Shampoo sorry, airen... Shampoo let you down!" she sniffled in dismay, blinking back tears of equal parts grief and pain. She instinctively held out her arms, eager to rush into Ranma's comforting embrace, but held back from her usual tackling embrace, her stings blaring a warning against any further pressure on her skin.

"I too must apologize, Ranma darling," Kodachi sombrely admitted, eyes downcast.

To their mutual surprise, Ranma tenderly drew them both in for a very brief, very gentle hug, doing his best not to aggravate Shampoo's stings in the process.

"Hey, it's alright - we knew they were gonna cheat... we just didn't realize how good they were at it," he consoled them.

"Saotome!"

Ranma turned to face his counterpart on the Foxy Pirates, his eyes cold as a windswept glacier on the winter solstice. "Whaddya want?"

"I wanted to apologize - zat trick wit ze bees was not my idea, nor would I have approved it. Zat's just cruel," the older captain insisted, shaking his head in disappointment.

"Yeah, right," Ranma scoffed.

A grimace flickered across Foxy's face, but was promptly swallowed by his usual sneer. "Believe what you like, kid. But I didn't just come here to express my sympathies! Ze point of ze matter is, you lost, so that means one of your crew is mine! We're heading back to the main stage so I can make my selection."

"...Fine, we'll be there," Ranma growled thunderously.

And so...

The Kamikaze Pirates stood before the main stage that had been erected prior to the start of the Davy Back Fight, with the Foxy Pirates giving them a wide berth. Whilst it might have been motivated by courtesy, it probably had a lot more to do with the frigid battle aura that Ranma was giving off, which had lowered the temperature by at least twenty degrees in a twenty foot radius. Even Ranma's own companions were discretely leaning away from their icily livid captain, the sole exception being Shampoo, who found the cool wind wonderfully soothing on her many stings.

A pair of Foxy Pirates in fancy-looking crimson uniforms beat a staccato tattoo on some waist-slung drums as Foxy marched triumphantly up between them.

"And now, the winning captain will claim his prize!"

Everybody seemed to hold their breath, pirate and onlooker alike, waiting for Foxy to make his call. They didn't have to wait long before the older pirate cackled madly and thrust out his right index finger.

"Fehfehfehfehfeh! I choose you, the cook, Ukyo Kuonji!" he cried triumphantly as the drummers abruptly ceased their drumroll to emphasize his proclamation.

Silence fell across the assembled crowd, before a thunderous bellow of "WHAT?!" erupted from the Kamikaze Pirates.

"Me?!" Yelped Ukyo.

"Whaddya want with Ucchan?!" Ranma demanded, protectively stepping in front of his childhood friend and would-be wife.

"I'll tell you why I want her: because zat was ze greatest okonomiyaki I have ever eaten in my life!" Foxy passionately cried back.

Another collective bellow of "WHAT?!" greeted this proclamation.

"She is a genius! A culinary genius! With her manning an okonomiyaki stall, ze Foxy Pirates will make a killing at our next Davy Back Fight! Fehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy continued, nonplussed by their confusion.

"...Well, thank you?" Ukyo cautiously ventured, though she couldn't resist puffing up a little in pride at the obvious impact her cooking had left on the rival pirate captain's opinion.

"But enough talk! I made my choice, so bring her to me!" Foxy barked, snapping his fingers for emphasis.

As some of the Foxy Pirates' bigger, burlier crewmen cautiously approached the circle, Ukyo and Ranma exchanged a glance. Each saw the same thing in the other's eyes; sorrow, regret, and a burning passion for vengeance. It was Ukyo who spoke first.

"Don't worry, Ranchan, I understand; it's all about our honor, right?" She assured him, somewhat weakly.

"I will win ya back, Ucchan, and that's a promise!" Ranma vowed, never taking his eyes off of her even as Ukyo walked towards the stage and stoically climbed aboard. Several Foxy Pirates greeted her there, making her put on the strange mask - a combination of a stylized old-timey bandit's mask and a fox ear headband - that seemed to be the crew's symbol of membership.

"And so Captain Foxy officially marks his first victory by taking the Kamikaze Pirates' cook, Ukyo Kuonji! I must say, I applaud Foxy's decision - that okonomiyaki was delicious! Any chance we can take a brief break for lunch, boss?"

"Stop thinking with your stomach and get on with it!" Foxy roared at his commentator, eliciting laughter from the villagers who were watching the show, as well as many of the Foxy Pirates themselves.

"Okay, okay, sheesh! The next round will be Hit and Dead Ball! ...There will be a brief recess whilst we finish setting up the field, though!"

About ten minutes later...

"Thank you for your patience! We are now ready to begin with the second round; a game of Hit and Dead Ball!"

The assembled Kamikaze Pirates studied the arena that the Foxy Pirates had prepared, which was basically just a huge rectangle marked on the ground with white paint, with a small stand on one side for Itomimizu (Chirpchirp perching on a log placed beside it). At the center of the field, two roughly head-sized balls of some white material had been placed - they looked roughly like volleyballs, except for the fact that each had several large, rounded off spike-like protrusions.

"Kind of reminds me of the soccer field back in Junior Higher," Ryoga muttered.

"Forget the ring, I'm more worried about the players!" Nabiki snapped.

And she had a good reason to do so. Ranma and his crew had known the Foxy Pirates were a large crew, but this event, which saw them separate from the crowd of villagers turned onlookers and cluster around the arena, truly made the size of the crew evident. There were hundreds of men, in all shapes and sizes, with a smaller but still sizable band of dozens of women clustered round Porche, evidently their unofficial leader. And even in this crowd, there were those who stood out. There were two fishmen, one of whom had eight unnaturally long, boneless arms. There were two ridiculously huge men; a big, stout man with an unfortunate facial resemblance to a hippo, and a square-jawed, flabby-cheeked, broad-shouldered great neckless hulk who reminded them of the mythical nurikabe. And, at the back, towering over them all...

Ranma swallowed hard. "Uh... Miriam? Am I nuts, or is that... a wotan?"

"You ain't seeing things... he's like me," Miriam replied through gritted teeth, staring balefully at the titanic figure.

He towered over the admittedly dwarfish Miriam by a clear margin, and could have passed for a purebred giant with a somewhat unusual yellowish-brown skin tone and short, spikey red beard and hair, but his webbed hands, jagged teeth and the massive fin running down the length of his spine all made it obvious that he had fishman ancestry. His skin glistened strangely in the sun, and he went about almost naked, save for boots, a speedo, and a pair of gloves. However, he'd also clearly been involved in some very hard fighting recently, as his chest was a mess of stitches and improvised bandages, the Foxy Pirates having struggled to dress his wounds in the face of his sheer size.

"He's obviously the muscle of the crew... but look at those wounds; maybe they won't risk him in a game like this?" Nabiki suggested, her nervous tone betraying her efforts to sound optimistic.

Before any of them could venture an opinion, Itomimizu suddenly spoke up.

"Before the match formally begins, a brief recap! As I said before, the name of the game is Hit and Dead Ball! The balls in question are the two you see on the field right now. If the opposing team hits you with one of those babies, you're outta the game! The teams are divided into on-court and off-court members. They're free to choose which ones go where in whatever number, but once you run out of on-court members, you lose the match! But keep in mind that although off-court members can throw the ball around just like anyone else, they're not allowed to enter the court under any circumstance."

"Pirates play dodgeball?!" an incredulous Nabiki asked, but once again Itomimizu cut her off before anyone could really think to answer her.

"There are some other miscellaneous details, so be sure to read the rulebook carefully!"

And with that said, the ever-grinning commentator heaved a huge leather-bound tome through the air at Ranma, who snatched it with one hand before cracking it over to take an inquisitive peek inside.

"Hit and Dead Ball is one of the greatest and most time-honored Davy Back Fight games! Because it has been played so many times over the years, more and more rules have been added to balance and perfect its form. Only by strict adherence to these rules can the game truly be enjoyed!"

"Pfeh. As if none of us here hasn't figured out they're going to break every damn rule in that book," Ryoga scoffed.

"I don't think it's quite that simple, Ryoga... the very first rule in this thing is that any referee caught breaking the rules gets decapitated on the spot," Ranma absently noted.

"...Pirates take their dodgeball seriously," Ukyo noted, laughing weakly as she did.

"Maybe that means this will be a fair fight?" Harumi suggested optimistically.

"I doubt it. Knowing the rules means you know better than anyone how ta break 'em," Ranma growled, Kodachi and Nabiki nodding solemnly in fellow feeling.

"To ensure that the rules are followed correctly, we have a team of five referees on stand-by, led by a fifty-year veteran of the sport, the venerable Rokuroshi! Now that the explanations are done, will the Kamikaze Pirates please get their team sorted?"

"Yeah, yeah, give us a minute, big mouth!" Ranma shouted back, before turning to face his crewmates.

"Alright... Shampoo, I hate to say this, but you need to sit this one out-"

"Shampoo can fight!" protested the Zoan, only to wince as the motion jostled the many stings visibly dotting her swollen flesh.

"You just took enough bee venom to kill somebody - you sit this one out!" Ranma barked.

"Logically, I should abstain from the court as well; my current body is both a considerable target and ill-suited to dodging," Dyna calmly announced.

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking... but, there's something you can do to help us, too," Ranma added.

"Query?" Dyna asked, single eye flashing as she stared solemnly at Ranma.

In response, Ranma handed her the rulebook. "I don't know much about robots, but I've heard they're way better at reading and memorizing stuff than most humans. You might be our ace in the hole if they try any loopholes."

"It shall be done," came the solemn response as the robot girl reached out with her pincer-like claw and carefully took the book, her smaller manipulators extending and beginning to flick through the pages at a blistering speed.

"Should I sit this one out too, captain? I know I'm an obvious target," Miriam asked.

Ranma shook his head. "Nah... if we can control the balls, then your muscles should let us do some real damage to the enemy team! Plus... well, yeah, you're an obvious target, but we can use that. No offense."

"None taken. Let's get this party started," Miriam grinned toothily, punching one fist into her palm and cracking her knuckles, eyes burning vengefully before she strode onto the playing field alongside Ranma, Nabiki, Kodachi, Ryoga and Harumi.

"Okay then, let's get this show on the road! The Foxy Pirates are playing strong with a veritable armada of players! But on the other hand, the Kamikaze Pirates look feeble by comparison - with only a measly six members on the field, one has to wonder if they're even trying..."

"Hey, not everybody has a freaky-huge crew like you do!" Ranma indignantly shouted back at them.

"Anywho, enough with the pre-game banter, it's time for the traditional double opening tip!"

From his high chair next to Itomimizu's commentator's box, Rokuroshi held up two hands.

"Each team bring two players to the center of the field!" he cried.

"Captain darling, allow me the honor of being your second," Kodachi asked.

Ranma nodded to her in response. "Sure - there's nobody on this crew I'd bet on with a ball like you."

The heiress squealed softly in delight, beaming with glee as she marched out alongside Ranma to the painted circle where the two balls waited, each held by one of the four subordinate referees, who had taken up matching positions at the north and south poles of the circle. Meanwhile, the fishmen members of Foxy's crew marched out in response, the cheating captain evidently gambling their superhuman physical prowess would pose a challenge to the martial artists of the small but tough crew he was facing. The four players took up their positions on the ease and west poles, staring fixedly into each other's eyes.

"Ready? Set! And... GO!" Rokuroshi cried, before blowing on his whistle, the signal for the two junior referees to hurl the balls as high into the air as they possibly could.

Foxy lost his gamble; the Kamikaze Pirates' acrobatic specialists exploded skyward faster than even their fishman rivals could react, with Ranma and Kodachi absently aware that the two fishmen had ended up burying their fists in the ground and sticking fast in their failed effort to sucker punch them whilst they were distracted by the balls. Neither Ranma nor Kodachi cared; their attention was fixated exclusively on the two balls, which they deftly snatched from the air.

"Let's start with that jerk Foxy!" Ranma snarled, a wicked grin spread across his face.

"It'll be my pleasure, darling," Kodachi purred, sweet as poisoned honey.

"Avoid the face! Strikes to the face are invalid! Article Twenty-Three!" Dyna suddenly shouted, her voice echoing unnaturally as some hidden microphone apparatus magnified her warning cry.

"What?! How did'a she know zat?!" an incredulous Foxy demanded.

"Avoid the face, huh?" Ranma mused aloud.

"Challenge accepted," Kodachi cackled, before drawing back her arm and launching the ball like a spinning meteor of white. It slammed brutally into Hamburg's chest, the impact fierce enough that even he staggered back, but that was just first blood. Like a demented pinball from hell it ricocheted from Hamburg and into the incautious Foxy Pirates nearest him, bouncing off of nearly a dozen more masked pirates, including the hulking brute bigger than Hamburg, before finally smacking Foxy squarely in the back of the head with enough force to pitch him into the dirt. It rebounded from the back of his skull and flew up into the air, whirling right for Kodachi, who snatched it deftly from the air.

"Fourteen members of Team Foxy are eliminated!" Rokuroshi cried authoritatively, waving his hand for emphasis.

"Including our boss! He's outta the game already!?"

"Alright, 'dachi! My turn!" Ranma declared, the bloodthirst practically dripping from his words as he lobbed the ball upwards and then savagely spiked it down. It screamed through the air and smashed right into the chest of the eight-armed fishman, launching him clean off of his feet with such force that he smacked into a cluster of eight of his fellows and brought them rolling across the ground.

"Nine members of Team Foxy eliminated!" Rokuroshi declared.

"Learned that trick from a Martial Arts Volleyball player on Manza Beach!" Ranma bragged.

"My ball, my ball!" Miriam cried, charging eagerly forward and stooping to grab the now-free ball. Funnily enough, fewer of the smaller and lighter Foxy Pirates dared to stand in the charging wotan's way, her footfalls thundering as she went, and she quickly scooped it up. With surprising deftness for such an ungainly looking figure, she pirouetted and launched it underarm at a particularly dense clump of Foxy Pirates. They tried to scatter, but they just weren't fast enough as the ball slammed into them and blew them off their feet, sending them crashing back to earth outside of the marked borders of the game.

"Two dozen members of Team Foxy eliminated for going out of bounds!" came the referee's call.

Miriam cheered and jumped up and down in her glee, creating a wide but shallow crater as she did.

"Holy crap, but the Kamikaze Pirates started off strong! They may be small, but these pirates pack a punch! Team Foxy's own numbers are actually putting them at a disadvantage - oh, and there goes another dozen from Kodachi's diabolical ricochet shot! But it's not all doom and gloom, because now our idol Porche has one of the balls!"

The needle-nosed young woman's normally pretty face was twisted into an ugly sneer. "Let's see how tough you really are! Big Pan, show that blue bitch what a real wotan can do!"

As she cried out, she launched her newly acquired ball to the massive halfbreed on the sidelines, who grinned stupidly as he caught it, the orb a tiny speck by comparison. His massive arm drew back with the slow but crushing inevitability of a glacier, before rocketing back around with the same deceptive sluggishness, launching the ball like a cannonshot.

Miriam snarled, her shark-like teeth bared in a ferocious leer as she braced herself, hands raised defensively in front of her.

"Destroying or devouring the ball results in immediate disqualification!" Dyna suddenly shouted.

"Oh, seriously?!" an incredulous Miriam bellowed, but by then it was too late. Through some minor miracle, she managed to get her hands in front of the blur of white, audibly snarling as it slammed into her with bone-rattling force. She dug in her heels as the impact thrust her backwards, even her strength and, well, let's be honest, sheer bulk struggling with the power of a wotan who clearly favored the giant portion of his ancestry. Her feet dug deep trenches in the soft, sandy soil as she slid inexorably backwards, sliding back, and back, and back...

And then she stopped. Slowly, she straightened from her bracing half-crouch, glistening teeth falling to the ground below from where they'd been clenched in her gritted jaws until they broke, and she glared at her counterpart on the enemy team.

"I'm still standing, you bastard!" she spat at Big Pan, who merely grinned stupidly and gave her a shy little wave, a faint blush on what little of his cheeks could be seen through the beard, and Miriam recoiled in revulsion.

"Incredible! Miriam of the Kamikaze Pirates miraculously takes a direct hit from Big Pan's infamous killer throw and survives! How unfortunate that it was all for nought!"

"What?!" Demanded the Kamikaze Pirates as one.

"Out! Miriam is disqualified for going out of bounds!" Rokuroshi suddenly cried.

Miriam blinked incredulously, then glanced down at her feet. Sure enough, even through the sod piled up around her ankles, it was plain to see that she had slid to a stop with her heels jutting over what had been the boundary line. The formerly triumphant wotan wilted, her broad shoulders slumping and her despair written plainly on her face.

"I-I'm sorry, captain..." she mourned.

"Wasn't your fault, Miriam - don't worry, we'll make 'em pay!" Ranma declared passionately.

"The ousted player will give the ball to the Foxy Pirates and leave the field!" Rokuroshi interjected sternly.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going, gramps," Miriam sourly muttered, casually tossing the ball in the vague direction of the nearest cluster of Foxy Pirates before stomping away, flopping down on a nearby hillock with a teeth-rattling tremor before propping her elbows on her knees, resting her chin in her cupped hands, and pouting as she watched the game proceed without her.

"I hope you don't think you're gonna win just because you took out one of us," Ranma jeered to Porche as the acting head of the Foxy Pirates team stooped to capture the ball. Beside him, Kodachi flippantly bounced the ball they had retained on the tip of her finger before laughing at the top of her lungs, making every Foxy Pirate and onlooker cringe at once.

"No, I think we're gonna win because of this! Flower Hypnosis!" Porche cried, whipping out a baton from a previously concealed holster on her back. In the same motion, she hit a hidden trigger and a bouquet of flowers burst from one end of her baton, which she pointed at Ranma and the other Kamikaze Pirates.

And then everything went black...

?

"And there you have it! In a last-minute upset, Team Foxy wins the match!"

Ranma groaned as Itomimizu's Transponder Snail-amplified voice roused him from his slumber, the fog slowly seeping from his mind.

"Wha...what happened?" He blearily asked, peering around the battlefield. He'd never been much of a morning person, despite a lifetime of dawn sparring sessions, so at first, he couldn't piece together what he was seeing - Ryoga, Kodachi, Harumi and Nabiki all slowly picking themselves up from the grass, and looking just as confused as he felt.

"You was cheated, airen!" Shampoo shouted angrily from the sidelines.

"There are no official prohibitions against the use of hypnosis techniques," Dyna interjected, the faintest hint of irritation on her usually doll-like features.

"Just because it no in book not mean it no go against spirit of game!" Shampoo spat in disgust.

"Hypnosis...? Wait... you knocked us all out with a trick baton!" Ranma realized, jumping to his feet angrily.

Porche stuck up her nose and smirked triumphantly. "It's your own fault for being dumb enough to fall for it!"

Ranma snarled, grinding his teeth and clenching his fist until his knuckles cracked from the pressure. Kodachi began to stalk forward, eyes burning with a dangerous light, fixed on Porche like a hungry cat staring at an incautious mouse. Fortunately for the older girl, Foxy suddenly strode out onto the playing field, cackling triumphantly.

"Fehfehfehfehfehfehfehfeh! What's'a wrong, kid? Not as easy as you thought, eh?" He leered at Ranma.

"...I'm going to break your face in the next round," Ranma solemnly vowed.

"Talk is'a cheap kid! But right now, you lost'a ze match, which means I getta take one of you crew! Drummers?"

The two Foxy Pirates from earlier stepped forth from the crowd and began a drumroll, Foxy making a show of looking over the Kamikaze Pirates, who all stared bitterly back at him.

"I want... you! Dyna, ze robot!" Foxy cried suddenly, pointing for emphasis and grinning widely.

"What?!" Ranma bellowed.

"You forgot ze rules already, kid? I can'a pick anyone zat'a I choose, and I choose her!" Foxy cackled.

"Listen, you cheating bastard," Ranma began, only to be interrupted.

"Do not demean yourself, Captain Saotome. The stakes of the game were made quite clear when we began. It is... a suboptimal outcome, but we both knew it was a possibility," Dyna mildly declared, scuttling forward like some mad mechanic's vision of a crab.

"There's gotta be something we can do," Ranma protested feebly.

"There is not. You only have one match remaining, you can only win one of your crewmates back," Dyna reminded him.

"Th-Then we'll challenge him to a second Davy Back Fight! We can't just leave you with him - what about your dream of going home?!" Ranma demanded, instinctively taking a step towards her.

"...Illogical. You have lost one of your fiancees in this game. You can only have her back if you win the next match. Why would you risk them again just to win my freedom from the Foxy Pirates?" the gynoid asked him.

"Because you're part of this crew, too! I promised to help you find your home - leaving you stuck floating around the Grand Line with this loser is the exact opposite of that!" Ranma snapped.

"...Loser? He thinks I'm a loser?" Foxy sobbed, falling to his knees in dismay, the act drawing Hamburg and Porche to his side, where they began to console him.

The two Kamikaze Pirates ignored the drama, simply staring at each other silently. Dyna's glowing eye flickered, and she subtly shook her head.

"Illogical," was all she said, before she scuttled over to where Foxy had finally climbed to his feet.

"Fehfehfehfeh! Welcome aboard, Miss Dyna! I'll admit, I'm not quite'a sure just yet where I'll put you, but I will find a place! Now then, Captain Saotome... ze last match of ze Davy Back Fight awaits - ze Captain's Match! Are you ready?" He jeered, grinning his twisted smirk at Ranma.

"Right here, right now," Ranma spat back at him, a cold battle aura creeping briefly across his skin and blackening the grass underfoot before he reined it back in.

"Eager little punk, aren't you? But we don't do things so uncivilized in zis game! No, we follow ze rules..."

Minutes later...

"It's been one hell of a day, but we're not done yet! We've finally arrived at the combat round, which means that before we start, we must decide on the battlefield! The two competitors spin this unbiased cannon, and wherever it stops, is the place where they'll do combat!"

The cannon that Itomimizu was a simple firing piece on a rotating base, the kind of thing that would normally be found mounted as a swivel-turret on a battleship, but which the Foxy Pirates had installed with surprising speed on a convenient hill overlooking the beach. Ranma and Foxy stood to either side of it, bent over and resting their hands on the podium. A silent three-count, and then they heaved, sending the cannon spinning around and around, whirling in a circle that slowly began to crawl to a halt...

And then it sharply banked around until it was pointing straight at the looming form of Foxy's ship and detonated, sending its cannonball flying through the air to land with a distant explosion squarely in the center of the ship's main deck.

Ranma turned a baleful gaze on his counterpart. "Honestly, I can't even say I'm surprised, but I would have thought you'd at least care a little about damaging your ship."

"Fehfehfehfeh! Do you have'a any idea how'a many shipwrights I gotta on my crew?! A few explosions is nothing!" Foxy cackled proudly.

"There you have it, the battlefield has been set! Would you look at that! By sheer coincidence, it's on the deck of the Sexy Foxy!"

"...He called his ship the Sexy Foxy?" an incredulous and mildly disgusted Nabiki asked.

"I've heard some pretty crappy ship names in my time, but that has to take the crabcake," Miriam responded, her disdain written all over her face.

Ranma might not be able to spell the word 'schadenfreude', but that was definitely what he was feeling as he watched Foxy collapse to his knees in dismay at the critique he was receiving.

Oblivious to his captain's current bout of depression, Itomimizu continued with his usual cheerfulness.

"Moving right along, let's explain the rules of combat! Everything within fifty meters of where the cannonball landed is considered part of the battlefield - in other words, it's a one hundred meter wide circle measuring from the center of the ship! Weapons and anything else found inside the designated battlefield are allowed! However! Outside crewmembers are strictly forbidden from entering the ship! Knock your opponent out of bounds, and you win the match, simple as that! Also, as long as you're in the circle, fighting in the air or water is fine!"

"Of course, to ensure that you all have the opportunity to properly enjoy the upcoming match, we ask your patience whilst the Foxy Pirates assemble proper seating! In the meantime, please feel free to avail yourself of the entertainment, including Porche leading the Flower Girls, some sparring matches on the Sexy Foxy's figurehead, and, of course, the myriad delights of our very own Association of Stalls!"

Shortly thereafter...

"What the heck is all this junk?" Ranma asked, staring incredulously at the room around him, which was packed to the brim with wigs, costumes, boxing gloves and more miscellaneous bric-a-brac than he could be bothered to name.

"This is the dressing room; you gotta wear gloves for the match, but as far as the rest, anything goes," explained the Foxy Pirate who'd led him here.

"Why would I bother?" Ranma asked.

His guide shrugged in response. "Lot of captains like to glam themselves up for the match, make themselves look tougher or flashier. It's all up to you."

That said, he turned and left, closing the door behind him and leaving Ranma to contemplate his many, many options.

'Hmm... flash it up, eh...?'

And outside...

As cannons roared and Itomimizu announced the start of the final round, the surprisingly elaborate stands surrounding the strip of coastline where the Sexy Foxy's twin stylized paw-anchors had been deployed were filled with people, buzzing with excitement, happiness, and anticipation.

All except for two spots; a front row seat where the Kamikaze Pirates had gathered, with Miriam standing on the ground in front of the stands due to her height, and a lone chair amongst the female members of the Foxy Pirates, where Ukyo sat. In both spots, you could cut the tension with a knife, and not even the bounty of popcorn and cola that both groups had surrounded themselves with took away from that.

"Airen going to win this, you stop being so worried," Shampoo insisted to her seatmates.

"I don't know - this whole Davy Back Fight has been more than we bargained for!" Miriam rebutted her, twisting around to look at them.

"They cheat, not win fairly!" was the immediate protest from the ship's resident Zoan.

"I must concur; that 920 to 1 record is concerning," Kodachi darkly added.

"Ranma can't even claim a record that good!" Nabiki reminded them for emphasis.

"What, you girls giving up on your boyfriend?" Ryoga asked, basking in the rare feel of schadenfreude.

Shampoo, Kodachi and even Nabiki turned on him, visibly snarling in a rage. Fortunately for Ryoga, and even more so for the luckless bystanders at ground zero of an impending Kamikaze Pirate brawl, the sky suddenly went dark, distracting them. Casting their eyes heavenwards, they watched as spotlights flared to life, projecting giant copies of Ranma and Foxy's bounty posters against the - artificial, they would later find - cloud cover.

"Ladies! Gentlemen! Children of all ages! Turn your eyes to the figurehead and put your hands together for our combatants!"

A thick cloud of fog began to pour from a doorway concealed in the Sexy Foxy's left ear, a figure swaddled in a heavy cloak emerging through the swirling fumes, three men performing a strange dance as they remained cloaked in the mist.

"In the left corner! Returning to the arena for the first time since the first and only combat loss of his illustrious career, you know him! You love him! Give it up for our wonderful boss, Foxy the Silver Fox!"

With a dramatic flourish, Foxy flung his cloak aside, revealing that he had stripped down to his pants, adding a pair of boxing gloves and elbow protectors. The Foxy Pirates erupted in a cacophony of cheers, waving their arms and shouting encouragement down to their captain, who visibly drank it up like a wilting seedling after a gentle spring rain, posing and flexing to the admiring roars of the crowd.

"He may be a cheating bastard, but his crew sure seems to love him," Miriam noted.

Before her crewmates could reply, fog poured from the right ear, and it was their turn to cheer in anticipation, especially as a cloak-wrapped figure came striding confidently through the artificial mist.

"And in the right corner! Our challenger, hailing from the mysterious land of Nerima Island, the captain with a tiny crew but a big bounty, it's the mad martial artist! Ranma 'Doesn't Have a Moniker Yet' Saotome!"

Ranma too flung aside his cloak with a dramatic flourish, revealing he had traded in his usual garb for a bare chest, a set of skin-tight wrestler's long pants, and a pair of boxing gloves. The newly returned sun glistened off of his skin, highlighting every sinewy curve and graceful yet powerful muscle.

Kodachi and Shampoo audibly moaned in desire, and a ragged chorus of wolf-whistles, cheers and obscene propositions went up from the minority of women watching them. Ukyo's eyes went so wide that they felt on the verge of bursting as she drank in every glorious inch, whilst Nabiki whipped out a long-range camera from one of her pockets and hastily began to snap photos.

"Welcome to my ship, Ranma Saotome! Hope you enjoy your stay! Fehfehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy cackled jubilantly.

"I hope those shipwrights of yours are as good as you say they are... because they're gonna have their work cut out after I'm through!" Ranma snarled at him, ignoring the meaningless chatter of Itomimizu babbling something to the crowd. Even when hidden pistons of incredible size hoisted the stands aloft so they had a clearer view of the battle, Ranma still didn't take his eyes off of Foxy.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity to the anxious young captain, the starter bell rang out.

With a furious cry, Ranma shot forward, ready to lay Foxy out cold with a single right cross. To his surprise, Foxy managed to dodge Ranma's attack, admittedly by the skin of his teeth. Ranma followed with a left-right-left combo, and then a spin-kick, but the egg-shaped older man avoided every blow.

"Well, I see you know how to run as well as cheat!" Ranma spat.

"You'd be surprised what I know, kid! Slow-Slow Beam!"

Ranma sprang backwards, trying to put distance between himself and his assailant, but was caught at the top of his arc by a scintillating wave of energy rings that washed over him. As they touched him, suddenly went haywire, the whole world seeming to literally blur around, like he was watching a video recording on fast forward.

"What the?" he tried to demand, but his own voice slurred and garbled in his ears, bouncing around inside his skull and coming out funny.

The Foxy-shaped blur jittered, his face an indecipherable mess of motion, his words crashing into Ranma's ears all at once and making the young captain fight to piece together what he was actually saying.

"Fehfehfehfehfeh! HowdyoulikemySlowSlowBeamnastylittlesurpriseisntit?"

Moving impossibly fast even to Ranma, Foxy zipped back and forth between where he was standing and the ear, emerging with a kind of cannon-turned-bazooka slung over his shoulder and the business end pointed squarely at Ranma.

"NormallyIwouldntdothisbutIgottasomethingtoprovenotimetoplayaroundtoday! Nohardfeelingskid!"

And then he fired, the turbocharged cannonball slamming Ranma right in the gut. He couldn't hope to describe the feeling of it striking him and then seeming to rest against his skin before it suddenly blew up, flooding Ranma's vision with smoke.

"Threetwoonezero!"

Suddenly, time snapped back to normal - and that was when the effects of the cannonball also made themselves felt. Ranma screamed in pain as the impact ripped through his body and he was sent flying through the air, so stunned and confused he couldn't even hope to arrest his momentum, which propelled him right off the Sexy Foxy's nose.

Finally, Ranma's aching limbs returned to his control and he arrested his flight with a series of momentum-bleeding flips, coming to an unharmed landing on the soft sand below.

He was about to leap for the nearest anchor chain and return to the fray, when the cheers of the crowd and, somehow rising over it, the dismay of his crewmates stole his will to fight... especially as he registered what Itomimizu was saying.

"INCREDIBLE! Not even five minutes in, and Foxy wins the Captain's Match with a ring out, thanks to the powers of his famous Slow-Slow Beam! Which means the Foxy Pirates win their third consecutive game, and the Davy Back Fight as a whole, in a landslide victory!"

Ranma staggered, poleaxed, his knees giving out beneath him as the full impact of those words struck him.

"I... lost...?" he whispered dumbly, eyes wide but not seeing anything.

Moments later...

"Oh, yeah, sure, this went great! A real cakewalk, just like you said! I always knew you were an idiot!" Ryoga bellowed, shaking Ranma by the throat.

"Get off him!" Shampoo snarled, backhanding Ryoga across the face and making him release Ranma in sheer surprise.

"You little-!" he spat in fury.

"Next time, Shampoo use claws!" she hissed, snapping into her bestial hybrid form and baring her fangs at Ryoga.

Then she spun around and glomped onto Ranma, burying her face in his naked, ash-stained chest. "Oh, Ranma, Shampoo here for you!"

"What the hell happened? How'd I lose?!" Ranma demanded, so caught up on that he was able to ignore Shampoo's efforts.

"It turns out that the so-called Silver Fox is a Devil Fruit user," Kodachi spat in disgust.

"Yes, you idiot, why weren't you prepared for that?" Ryoga demanded sullenly.

"How was I supposed to know? It's not like he said anything earlier, or used it! Hell, even his bounty is only twenty-four million - does that sound like somebody with a dangerous Devil Fruit ability to you?! Your bounty is only twenty-million!" Ranma protested.

Ryoga snarled and clenched his fist, ready to attack Ranma once again, only to be cut off by a sudden obnoxiously loud cackle.

"Fehfehfehfehfeh! As entertaining as all this is, though, can we get on with the ceremony? I don't have all day!" Foxy declared, having removed his boxing gloves and now tugging on his jacket, the two drummers once more performing their drumroll.

If looks could kill, the older captain would have been ashes, and Ranma looked ready to rip his head off, biting out between gritted teeth, "Make your damn choice."

"I most certainly will! Fehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy cried, thrusting his right index finger skywards.

"It's been a hard-fought Davy Back Fight today! Not gonna lie, you Kamikaze Pirates surprised me! It's really hard to make this choice after what I've seen! But, if I can only take one more Kamikaze Pirate for my own crew... then I have to take... YOU!" He cried loudly, pointing sharply as the drumroll ceased.

Ranma immediately spun on his heel to see which of his crewmates Foxy was pointing at. But, to his surprise, he couldn't see anyone in the direction Foxy had indicated.

"Uh... there's nobody there, Fox-face. Something wrong with your eyes?" Ranma asked, confusion managing to edge aside the seething hatred he felt for his counterpart.

"Don't get cute, kid! You know damn well I'm picking you, Ranma Saotome, to become the newest member of the Foxy Pirates!" Foxy cried.

Ranma stood there. Blinked a few times. Then shouted at the top of his lungs, "WHAT?!"

"You can't take our captain!" Harumi protested.

"That's not fair!" Miriam added.

"We won't let you!" spat Kodachi, Nabiki and Shampoo, who all protectively stood in front of Ranma.

"Hey, better him than us," Ryoga declared flippantly.

"You miserable swine!" Kodachi snarled, with Shampoo extending her claws to their fullest and even Nabiki glaring at Ryoga, withdrawing a set of brass knuckles from her purse and slipping them on.

"Girls, enough," Ranma interjected, reaching out to place a hand on their shoulders in turn.

"But Ranma!" They all protested.

"This was a match of honor... pirate honor, maybe, but still honor. I lost, and I'm not going to disgrace myself by trying to run out on a debt. I'm a lot of things, but I ain't my old man," Ranma declared flatly, shaking his head gently at the thought.

"You stupid, stubborn, righteous..." Nabiki began, shaking her head in dismay.

"I mean it - I gotta do this," he told her, before pushing past his dismayed girlfriends to stand in front of them before Foxy.

"So... what now...captain?" Ranma asked, biting out the honorific and trying to hold back his bitterness at having to say it.

Foxy threw back his head and laughed, and laughed, and laughed...

Soon afterwards...

Ranma's footsteps echoed off the hallways of the massive ship as he silently stalked after Foxy, instinctively reaching up yet again to fiddle with the mask he had been forced to wear as a symbol of allegiance before he caught himself and forced his hand down. Porche had led Ukyo and Dyna away to the women's quarters, whilst Foxy had insisted on personally taking Ranma to his new room aboard the Sexy Foxy.

"Well, here we are!" Foxy announced suddenly, and Ranma just caught himself before he walked into the older captain's back. He watched silently as Foxy swung open the door, revealing a plain but honestly fairly comfortable looking little room.

"It's notta much, but you are just starting out - I've no doubt that with your skills, you'll work your way up to better quarters, fehfehfehfeh!"

Ranma said nothing, instead just looking at what was supposedly going to be his home from now on.

"Hey, what's with the silent treatment, eh? Cheer up, kid! It's notta so bad being a Foxy Pirate! Everybody on my crew started out with somebody else, and they all love it here now! ...Well, with one exception," Foxy reluctantly added, his perpetual crooked grin fading into an equally crooked sneer.

"What happened?" Ranma asked, curiosity and the desire for a potential way out of this mess compelling him to speak up.

"Don't trouble yourself with it - is captain's business, and you're not a captain anymore, are you?" Foxy proclaimed, grinning.

Ranma grimaced, but said nothing in response; after all, what was there to say to that?

"Oh, don't look'a so glum! I'll let you in on a little secret, shall I?" Foxy proclaimed cheerfully.

"What?" Ranma asked sourly.

"Do you know why I picked you?" The older captain casually asked him.

"Because I'm the strongest on my crew," Ranma flatly announced.

"True, that helped. The fact you're smart - if not as smart as you think - didn't hurt either! The man who cost me my undefeated winning streak has a bounty only five million higher than yours, so you just may be what I need for revenge. But even with that... I still nearly chose someone else."

"What!? Why?" Ranma demanded, now fully focused on Foxy, his wounded pride flaring to life.

Staring coolly back at him, Foxy reached into an internal sleeve in his jacket and withdrew two bounties. Ranma's most recent, from before his monthly hiatus, and another, much older bounty... one that was also very familiar...

"Where'd you get...oh, you collect bounties, don't you? Gives you an eye for potential crew to go after," Ranma cut himself off, realization dawning even as he was about to demand to know why Foxy was carrying around a copy of the bounty sheet offering thirty million beries for his girl form.

"But of course! And I have to say, these two bounties tell a very interesting story indeed. It's one thing to steal a captain's crew, but to steal their name? You got balls, kid, and I'm not sure I like how you use them!" Foxy declared.

"I didn't! It's not what it seems!" Ranma blurted, trying to articulate an explanation even through his shock.

"It's written here in black and white, kid. Now, I don't got much patience for mutineers... I lost fourteen men that way. So, I was going to take your crew; fair's fair, after all! But then I saw you during the Davy Back Fight... I don't know how, I don't know why, but your crew seems to genuinely love you, and you respect them back. That's not as common as you'd think. One of the reasons I wasn't sad to see that bastard Kibageru had up and fled with one of the scouting boats in the middle of the night..."

Despite his flippant tone, Foxy was scowling thunderously at the memory.

"So, you're in, kid. And don't worry too much about your crewmates! I'll give them a little while to stew, then I'll go and challenge them to another Davy Back Fight - and another, if I have to! I won't stop until I've added them all to my crew, fehfehfehfehfehfeh!"

Still laughing maniacally, Foxy turned and walked away, leaving a stunned Ranma in his wake.

'...He thinks we're different people? He thinks I mutinied against myself!? ...This curse never stops being a pain in my ass, does it? … Wait a minute, I can use this! Let's see how you like being tricked...'

He ducked inside of the room newly declared as his, making sure to loudly slam the door so anyone watching would think he was sulking over his loss. He locked it, barricaded it with a small stool, and then immediately crossed over to the porthole.

'Lucky for me I got a window room!'

He deftly eased open the porthole, squeezed himself through, and then dove gracefully into the water waiting so far below, slipping in with barely a splash.

Moments later...

An almost literal cloud of gloom and despair hung over the remnants of the Kamikaze Pirates as they sat and sulked on a tidal rockpool close to where the Foxy Pirates had anchored. The stalls were still thriving with life as villagers and pirates alike ate, sank and danced, but none of the six remaining Kamikaze Pirates had any appetite.

"So... now what? We go our separate ways?" Ryoga asked, half-sincerely, half-spitefully.

"How can you even think of abandoning our captain?!" Kodachi hissed, turning a blazing glare on him that the rest of the crew followed.

"Well, what are we supposed to do? We're down a captain, and without Ranma, I don't fancy our chances of finding the One Piece all that much, do you?" Ryoga asked defensively.

"Gee, bacon butt, I didn't realize you thought that highly of me."

"Ranma!" shouted the assembled sextet, with varying degrees of relief, as their currently female captain came striding proudly from the pounding surf.

She gave them a cocky, open-toothed grin, but was cut off as Kodachi surged ahead in a powerful leap and wrapped her arms around the small boy-turned-girl in a crushing embrace.

"Oh, my darling! I thought I'd never see you again!" she sobbed, burying her head in the crook of Ranma's neck.

"Overacting clearly runs in the family," Nabiki dryly observed.

"What gives, Ranma? Were you just running your mouth off with all that honor crap before you left?" Ryoga demanded.

"Oh, no, I meant it. But it turns out that Mr. Slow Fox thinks my two forms are two different people," Ranma explained.

"...Doesn't everyone who isn't part of our crew?" Harumi asked, visibly confused.

"Yeah, but Foxy also wants to challenge us to another Davy Back Fight. I say we agree - but on our terms! You guys with me?" Ranma asked, grinning devilishly in anticipation.

Slowly, matching grins began to spread across the face of his crewmates...

"We're in!"

"I knew you would be! Now, before we find that cheating jerk, we need to figure out what we're gonna challenge him to...

Shortly afterwards...

"Captain Foxy of the Foxy Pirates, I, Captain Ranma Saotome of the Kamikaze Pirates, challenge you to a Davy Back Fight!"

Ranma tried her hardest not to grin in delight at the sheer bug-eyed shock on Foxy's face. It had taken some time to track down her opposing number, but she and her crew had finally found him at an ice cream stand with Hamburg and Porche.

"Wha-Wha-What?! B-B-But how?! You're dead!" Howled the older captain, pointing an accusatory finger at Ranma.

"Who told you that rubbish?!" Ranma furiously barked, both fists clenched.

"But the other Ranma-!" Foxy began to protest.

"You mean my brother?" Ranma interrupted him, a scornful look on her face.

"Your brother?!" Foxy spluttered.

"My twin brother. What, you couldn't tell?" Ranma asked, grinning mischievously.

"But your names-?"

"Our father was a lazy jerk, what can I say?" came the flippant response.

"The bounties!" Foxy pleaded.

"We're co-captains! We've got a little competition going for who can get the highest bounty - plus, it drives the Marines nuts," Ranma explained, never losing her smug smirk as she did.

"So, what'll it be, Silver Fox? Will you accept my Davy Back Fight? Or are you chicken?" Ranma demanded.

"I never turn down a Davy Back Fight! You're on, girl - you'll join your brother in swabbing my deck!" roared the fuming older man.

Smirking, Ranma held out her hand, and in a repeat of that morning, Kodachi lobbed her captain her own pistol, allowing Ranma to mirror Foxy in raising a pistol to the sky and firing.

Chapter End & Closing Notes

And that's the end of part 1! Originally, the entirety of the Davy Back Fights was going to be one big chapter, but my editor wisely convinced me to break things up to avoid reader fatigue. We all know Ranma has a history of copping a beating and then coming from behind to score the ultimate win; can he parlay that into this next Davy Back Fight? You'll just have to wait and see!