The Wings Of Our Dreams
AN: Hello there, my dear readers! Man it has been a long time since the last chapter. Like, almost five months long. Truly sorry about that, but the last chapter felt like a huge milestone and I had quite a burn out after that. But now I'm back, and with a new chapter. A bit shorter than usual, but I think it'll be satisfying.
And as of today, something monumental happened. Attack on Titan has finally aired its last episode! Man, this has been quite a journey. I remember watching the series back when it came out in 2013, and now ten years later (yeah, yeah, put your "Ten years at least!" jokes here) and to see it finally come to an end was... truly something to see. Okay, ngl, I saw the ending by reading the manga, and honestly I didn't like it. Still don't. I held some hope they might change it for the anime adaptation, but my hopes were dashed. There were some minor improvements, but not really anything that would change my mind about the ending. But regardless, on the whole, the anime is still a great piece of anime history, and a great journey that just fumbled at the end.
Also, this is the reason why the chapter is out as well. This being AoT's ending, I felt obligated to at least give you the new chapter as a sort of celebration.
On another note, I also decided what Collin's theme song should be. If you aren't aware, Isayama assigned his characters some theme songs that more or less describe them as characters, and for Collin, with major help from my friend RememberShiganshina, it was decided that his song should be "Unshaken" by D'Angelo. I think it's very fitting for his character.
But enough about my ramblings. Time for reviews.
Yoyon586: Thank you!
RememberShiganshina: Thanks! Your praise means a lot
HossamGasser0: I assure you, you don't have to worry about any of those in this chapter.
Boshwa: I do try to give some elements from the game, and integrate them as best as I can. And yeah, that moment with Reiner will definitely have impact
Lachie: Yeah, he really does need a hug
Guest: Yes, it is!
Ann: I'm glad
AsymmetricBlade: I'm glad you liked the chapter. It's definitely a very important moment for my fic as well as it was for the main story. And that artwork on AO3 isn't mine, a friend made it for me. And I'm glad you liked it. It's true, it really does elevate the moment.
guytrouble76: No problem
YungTurd: Okay, your wording is a bit confusing as I can't tell if you're praising me or criticizing me.
Drinor: Yeah, even I kinda regret splitting up Collin and Annie, but hey, it serves the purpose in the story. And sorry, but I don't plan on making this a harem
Josephplayz303: Well, here you go.
JThestoryteller2: No need, the chapter is here
The Retrieval Begins
Collin's gaze was glued to whatever was happening below. Which in this case was Eren trying to attack the Armored… to attack Reiner, and failing miserably. After striking the Armored Titan with his fists, the Rogue Titan's hands broke on impact, giving Reiner an easy chance to retaliate and send Eren flying with a punch of his own.
That wasn't a fight, that was just a beatdown.
Yet still, the fight itself isn't something Collin focused on. The one thing that stuck at the front of his mind, was that the creature that doomed humanity and killed his parents was walking just below him, and that the same monster was someone he called a friend for years.
No, not just a friend. Someone Collin would've outright called a brother.
The thought was just unfathomable. Collin saw what happened, he saw Reiner transform right in front of him. Yet he still couldn't believe it. This just didn't make sense. Reiner being the Armored Titan? Bertholdt being the Colossal Titan?
Looking to his right, Collin focused on the other behemoth. That was Bertholdt? The shy guy who had a habit of sweating a bit much, who slept funny poses, the guy Collin liked to tease, and someone who had no trouble helping his classmates. He was the bane of humanity?
Steam suddenly erupted from the Colossal, the amount being enough to send Collin flying. Collin grunted as his back struck the floor, his eyes shut tight both from the pain and intense heat.
After opening them with some effort, he saw the Colossal's steam was repelling over a dozen Scouts that had been going for an attack, which forced them to retreat. And it continued permeating steam. It was so hot that Collin backed away some distance further.
Then he glanced at his gear. He never got around to changing it, which meant that… he couldn't do anything.
And that struck him the most. Once again he was faced with betrayal. He was faced with the monster he wanted to kill ever since five years ago. And yet, there was nothing he could do about it.
His fists clenched as he bit his lip until it started bleeding. This was torture. In more ways than one.
Tears began dripping down Collin's eyes as he collapsed to his knees. His body shook, his lip bled, and he himself didn't know what the hell to focus on. He honestly felt like losing his mind.
And after that, nothing seemed to register for him anymore. He didn't notice how the fight progressed. How Eren was able to get the upper hand on Reiner, using the training they got from Annie, and pinning the Armored in a grip tight enough for the armored plates to stark cracking.
And then Betholdt's Titan fell down right on top of the two before exploding. Collin's eyes twitched when the strong winds from the blast reached him, making his long hair fly as he gasped. He finally saw that Bertholdt wasn't on the Wall anymore, and back at the bottom, he saw the Armored Titan running away.
"W-what?" Collin breathed out as he blinked. He slowly rose to his feet, his eyes still focused on the retreating figure of the Armored Titan.
"Hey! I see somebody in the smoke!"
Armin and a few other Scouts ran over to Collin, with Armin looking relieved when he saw the tall teen standing there. "Collin, we… We thought you were dead! Um, look, sorry I have to ask this of you so soon, but some of our comrades need help. So we better get going, come on!"
But Collin didn't seem to register what was said, he just kept staring at the place where the Armored was retreating.
"Um… Collin?" Armin said.
"Hey, are you deaf?!" Another Scout exclaimed. "Our comrades need help! So stop staring into space and move your ass!"
Armin's mouth hung open. He had an inkling of what was happening. It honestly didn't take a genius to see that Collin was in a state of shock. But he gasped when Collin finally turned towards them, and the brightness he usually had in his eyes was… gone.
"Yeah. Right," Collin said softly before rubbing his eyes and shaking his head lightly. "Let's go."
A few minutes later several Scouts were laid down, unconscious from the blast that was caused by the Colossal.
Collin helped remove Hange's Scout cloak and jacket slowly laying her down. Her face had visible red burn marks, showing she was hit particularly badly. Thankfully it wasn't in a fatal way. Among other Scouts that were out of commission were Moblit, the rest of Hange's Squad, and even Mikasa. Despite everything that happened, there weren't many casualties.
"Okay, put her down," Jean said as he and Connie brought over the stretcher that held the unconscious Nanaba on it. The original plan was to transport her but that was put on halt after the damage caused the Colossal and Armored Titans.
Once Nanaba was laid beside others, Collin couldn't help but glance at her with worry. Despite everything, she still hasn't awakened. She wasn't dead, thankfully, but what happened today clearly took a mental toll as well. And the reason she was like that was because she wanted to protect her defenseless comrades.
Collin felt his teeth grit harder. Defenseless? The only ones who could really classify like that were Connie and Kris… Historia (God, that would take time to get used to), while Ymir, Reiner, and Bertholdt were Titans. So what did Nanaba and her dead team end up sacrificing themselves for exactly?
He once again looked towards where Reiner ran off with Bertholdt. The two of them ended up taking Eren and Ymir with them. For what reason, nobody was completely certain, but it was definitely because of the two being Titan Shifters as well.
And all of that right under Collin's nose.
He could still remember Reiner berating him about needing to be a good soldier. Supporting him in his dreams to take back the home he lost. To think that someone like him was…? Was…?
It… It was all a lie. No, wait, it couldn't be. Could it? But… No, it was no use denying it anymore. The proof ended up shown right in front of Collin's face.
Collin flinched. He actually began feeling the burning on his skin. He tried not to think about it but he just couldn't help himself. He honestly felt his insides churn.
How could Reiner…? How could…?
But then Collin thought of the arm that grabbed him and stopped him from plummeting to his death.
Why would Reiner…? It didn't make sense. The jig was up. There were no more secrets to keep. Why keep Collin alive?
Collin groaned and clutched his head. Of all the questions he had, one was constant.
Why?
Why? Why, why, why, why? Just why?!
Why are you even here?
Collin quickly snapped out of his thoughts. Was someone talking to him? He looked around but saw that all the Scouts were minding their own business.
Blinking, Collin wondered if he just imagined that. Was everything that happened finally getting to him?
"No, can't go crazy now," Collin muttered to himself while rubbing his face.
But still, he wasn't so sure what exactly he would do. Or wanted to do.
Not too far from Collin, Jean looked at the tall teen with concern. Even people who vaguely knew him could see that something was wrong with him.
Jean exchanged some looks with Sasha and Connie, both of them just as unsure as he was. Giving Collin one last look, they decided to approach him.
"Um, hi, Collin," Jean said, gaining the said teen's attention. He took a breath before continuing. "L-listen, we were just, well, wondering if you're doing alright. Like, how are you feeling?"
The silence that followed was unnerving. Collin stared for a moment before his eyes narrowed. "How am I feeling?" he said in a low tone as he looked away. "How am I feelin'?" Collin let out a dry chuckle.
Then he swiftly turned around, his eyes narrowed as the silver shine in them intensified, making the three of them flinch.
"Now let's see, where the hell should I begin? Well, just yesterday I found out that my girlfriend was the Female Titan who killed my comrades," Collin said, fully turning towards them, with Connie and Jean suddenly feeling the need to step back. "And not even a day later, I found out that my best friend was the same fuckin' Titan who killed my parents and destroyed my life!"
He took a few steps forward as the three of them began to sweat. This… This was so unlike Collin. Such intensity and anger, they literally couldn't imagine him acting like that.
"So, if y'all can guess, tell me! How do ya think I feel?!"
None of them said anything or even moved an inch. They simply stood there nervous under Collin's glare, and with his clenched fist raised in the air, he looked like he was ready to pummel someone.
A few more moments of silence passed, with Sasha, Connie, and Jean trying not to collapse from the intensity of Collin's glare. Then Collin blinked, his face slowly losing the tension as a breath escaped his lips.
"I… I…" Collin stammered before looking down. He wiped his eyes. "I'm so sorry. I… I don't know what came over me. I just… I'm sorry."
Collin, not wanting to look them in the eyes, just moved towards the edge of the Wall before sitting down, letting his legs hang over the edge.
Nobody stopped him.
Connie, Jean, and Sasha looked at him with varying levels of sadness. Connie was about to come over but was stopped by Jean's hand on his shoulder.
"No. Let's leave him alone for a little while longer," Jean said, which got him a nod from Connie.
Connie and Jean left, but Sasha looked at Collin who just sat there, unmoving. She turned with the intention of leaving but cast one more glance at him. Making a decision, she walked over and took a seat beside Collin.
After a few moments of silence, Collin looked at her before giving a strained smile.
"'Ey, Sash."
She smiled back. "Collin."
Collin sighed. "I probably look like a wreck."
Sasha slowly moved her hand and grabbed him by the arm. "Nobody blames ya."
And how could they? Collin and Reiner were practically brothers, so the fact Reiner was the Armored Titan seemed… inconceivable.
Remembering something, Sasha reached into her jacket. "I still owe ya for before," she said which made Collin look at her curiously. Out of her jacket, Sasha pulled out… a steamed potato. "After I gave the report to Hange, I was given a potato. I remember ya sayin' you wanted me to give ya a potato so I… I decided to keep it."
Collin's eyes widened. "Um, Sasha, I… I wasn't bein' serious back then. I… was just messin' with ya."
She chuckled. "Yeah, I know." Sasha then put the potato between her hands before tearing it apart. "Here Have half at least."
Sasha handed him a part of the steamed potato, making Collin look at the piece of potato in her hand before slowly taking it.
He then chuckled. "Heh, it's an actual half this time."
Sasha blushed at that before Collin took a bite. "Sorry if it's cold."
"It's fine," Collin said before taking another bite. "Thanks, Sash."
"No, problem," she said before biting into her half.
They sat there for a minute and silently ate, with Collin looking less distressed which made Sasha feel happier.
"So, um," Sasha spoke. "Ya ain't getting' that burn checked."
Collin touched the red mark on his cheek. It stung but it didn't really bother. "Nah. It's just a waste of time and resources. Nothin' to be worried about."
"Well, if ya say so," Sasha said as she swung her feet lightly. "Hey, uh, sorry about what happened with Annie. Ya didn't deserve that happenin' to ya."
"It don't matter. Ain't like I'm the one who got it worst. People lost their lives 'cause of 'er."
"Yet you're the one still sufferin' cause of it." Sasha sighed. "And still… to think Reiner and Bert were…" She shook her head. "I still can't believe it."
"Well, there ain't no use talkin' about it now," Collin said as he rose. "We better get back to work before any of our superiors try an' lecture us."
"Um, sure." Sasha rose as well. "Sure you don't wanna talk about it. I… Well… I think you might need it."
Collin was silent for a moment before he sighed. "No. Not yet at least." His expression darkened again. "We have work to do."
"If ya say so." She liked to believe that he was better. She really did. But even she knew it wasn't that easy. And honestly, nothing seemed easy these days.
It took several hours, but the Scouts were finally getting back-up, which included not just the Scout soldiers, but Commander Erwin himself, as well as some of the MPs. Sasha was tasked with giving a report to the Commander who was located in Trost.
Moblit had also woken up, though he was a bit wobbly, and approached Erwin. "Good to see you, Commander Erwin. Glad you're here."
"Is the situation still the same?" Erwin asked.
"Yes, sir."
"Good." Erwin turned to his men. "Deploy the lifts!"
Moblit gasped when he felt someone grabbing his leg, and to his surprise, it was his own Section Commander lying right next to him on her stomach. "Hange!"
"Don't just stand there," Hange said, her voice strained and her face still covered in burns. "Give me a map."
Hange, despite definitely needing some proper recovery, insisted that everyone hears her. She came to the conclusion that Reiner and Bertholdt wouldn't have been able to make a beeline towards Wall Maria without rest. She knew the Shifters can get exhausted if they use their powers too much, and the place for them to gather their strength would be the Forest of Giant Trees. That's where they'd be out of Titans' reach and given enough time to rest.
So they had to reach them before they recuperate. By sundown at the latest. So the horses were quickly brought down by lifts.
Getting his new gear in order, Collin took a deep breath. It was time he settled this. He had to. For the past five years, this was in the back of his mind. It was close to him now. Right across that valley, it waited for him.
Yet still, the way it happened was the last way it wanted it to. He never thought that he'd want to kill the Armored Titan as much as he wanted to ask him questions. You'd think it'd be easy. After everything the Armored did to him, you'd think Collin would want nothing more than to kill Reiner and get revenge.
But it wasn't that simple. Not anymore. Reiner merely pretending the entire time, all the times they were together, Collin just couldn't see it. If that really were the case then Reiner must be the greatest goddamn liar in the whole world.
And there was still a matter of Reiner saving him back there. That's something Collin just didn't get. If they were truly enemies from the start, then why not let Collin fall to his death? Was there another agenda at play?
Collin shook his head and rubbed his face. This whole ordeal was giving him a nasty headache. One which he wished was just from it being hit.
A horse neighed behind Collin, prompting him to look back. He was surprised to see a familiar brown stallion with a brown spot in the middle of his forehead.
"Heh, hey there, Sammy," Collin said as he felt his lips lightly twitch upward. He petted the horse's mane, which the animal seemed to enjoy. "Looks like ya found me. Well, I know I promised ya some apples, but… Well, I ain't got any on me, so it'll have to wait." 'Provided we come back from this alive, at least.'
To Collin's shock, the horse went to nuzzle into his cheek. "Man, boy, guess ya really like me, eh?" He gave Sammy's mane some more pats. "Well, 'least now I know which horse I'm ridin' to battle."
He hopped onto the saddle and grabbed the reins. Honestly, it felt natural being on Sammy's back. The two were on a single expedition together, but it already felt like it was years of expeditions.
"Don't worry, if we win, I'm gettin' ya a bunch of apples. I promise." His response was a happy neigh. 'Gotta admit, thinkin' he actually understands me is a bit weird.'
"Men, get to your positions!" Erwin exclaimed as he addressed the rest of the mounted soldiers. "Our mission is to retrieve Eren Yeager from the Armored and Colossal Titans. The fate of humanity rests in our hands. Let's head out!"
The Commander began riding forward, the rest of the soldiers following him. All of them heading toward their most important mission yet.
Collin looked forward, determination ever present in his eyes. However this turned out, he had to end it.
"Hey, Collin!"
"Huh?" Collin looked to his right and saw that Jean was riding alongside him.
"Look, I know what you're thinking. No, scratch that, I'm not sure exactly what you're thinking, but I can get an idea. Listen, all I have to say is… you're not Eren. Don't go rushing blindly into this one. Trust me, humanity is better off having someone like you here. Don't waste it all just because you want revenge."
Collin raised a brow at that. Honestly, Jean's concern for him was… pretty touching. "I'll try my best, Jean."
Jean nodded. "That's all I'm asking for. We'd all appreciate it. I know Sasha would."
He didn't respond immediately. Instead, Collin just looked away for a moment. "Yes. I… I know."
"Good. That's good. Now come on! Let's save that suicidal maniac!"
"Of course!"
Collin berated himself for forgetting. How could the fact Eren needed their help slip his mind? Was he once again too focused on getting what he wanted? No, he wouldn't be not again. He won't let another friend be a casualty just because his own goals distracted him too much.
As much as he wanted revenge, he couldn't jeopardize other people's safety because of it. Eren and Ymir were being kept by Reiner and Bertholdt, so he had to focus on getting them back.
He won't fail. Not again.
Eren's eyes fluttered open, and he was met with the sight of huge treetops. He felt he was lying down on something hard, swearing it was a bark. With a slight moan, he rose, trying to make sense of his surroundings. He saw that he was surrounded by huge trees and that he was on a branch high up in the air.
He tried to remember what happened. He was on the Wall, where Reiner revealed that he and Bertholdt were the Armored and Colossal Titans. And when Reiner said they were going to capture him, Collin intervened, right before Mikasa went to strike Bertholdt. The two transformed, with Eren and Collin right in the middle of it. Then Eren remembered fighting Reiner, and Bertholdt exploding right on top of them.
Then he recalled something else. Collin! He didn't have functioning gear! What happened to him?
Eren tried to rub his head, but he noticed that… his arms were gone! Around him was wrapped his own tattered cloak, all the while the stumps that remained of his arms were steaming. He felt his limbs slowly grow thanks to his Titan healing but he wondered how he got into this situation.
"Eren."
Reiner's voice immediately snapped Eren out of his thoughts. Looking up, he saw Reiner and Bertholdt sitting atop branches located higher than Eren's was. Bertholdt was sitting while Reiner stood with his arms crossed, and both looking down at him.
Reiner continued. "Welcome back."
Soon after, Eren gritted his teeth as his eyes narrowed. "Reiner."
AN: And that is it for now, my dear readers! Sorry for making this shorter, but I promise that you won't have to wait nearly as long for the next chapter. I honestly think I'm starting to get back into the mood for the fic.
And a shoutout to my friend, RememberShiganshina, and his fic Our Friend, which is set to finish in only a couple of chapters, so I implore you all to give it a look.
Now, once again I tell you to check out my other fics. Trust me, they are worth it. And leave a review, they are great motivators.
See ya next time!