Everyday Life as an American Host

by Viktorformosa

Jack's life has suffered one hell of a shock lately. As things settle down however, one act of generosity draws the attention of the Inter-species Exchange and its local coordinator Mr. Smythe. Now Jack has an opportunity to change his life ,for better or worse, when he is asked to host several liminals for the Homestay program. OCs, SI(ish)

34. Chapter 34 Interview 6 Mishipeshu pt1

I do not own Everyday Life with Monster-girls.

Chapter 34: Interview with a Mishipeshu Part One

Sula sipped her lemonade and gazed upon the brittle calm that was the Keysman front lawn.

A war. A spectacular war was about to erupt.

Lines were drawn. Child soldiers from almost a dozen families were recruited. All combatants had outfitted themselves with modern weaponry.

The conflict would pit sister against brother. Friend against friend. Human versus monster.

No quarter would be given and no surrender would be accepted.

This was a fight to the bitter end.

Missus Tam, just to Sula's right, raised her own firearm into the air. She set her trigger finger but hesitated. "Is there no other way?" She asked, lips quivering. She knew the answer, but the question had to be asked.

The inevitable reply from the bloody minded fools was announced simultaneously. "NO!"

She shook her head and sighed. "I tried..."

Her finger squeezed the trigger. A lound phunt of forced air burst from her weapon.

The conflagration had begun.

Calvin hefted his white and orange battery powered dart thrower and unleashed a hail of death at the enemy.

Chloe dodged some of the incoming fire and rolled sideways into a prone position. She angled her bolt action dart rifle and aimed down its sights. Her first shot struck Ricky Garcia right above the belly button. She cleared her next shot and fired at Maria, narrowly missing by centimeters.

The echidna hefted a drum fed dart thrower and sprayed destruction and maniacal laughter indiscriminately over the combat lines.

Priscilla brandished her own pistols and fired back.

The melee had barley begun and already both sides suffered heavy casualties.

Missus Tam slid onto her lawn chair and placed her empty Nerf pistol on the plastic yard table next to a half- full glass pitcher of lemonade. She picked up her own cup and sipped a gulp through a bright red crazy straw. Her expression pinched as she swallowed the liquid. "Ooh, that's...very sweet."

"Sorry." Sula excused. "Lamias have pretty dull taste buds. So we have to punch up the ingredients for most of our foods to even appreciate their flavor."

"Yes." Mrs. Tam nodded and replaced her cup. "I think you mentioned that during the dinner last week." She reached down and retrieved a water bottle from the over-sized cooler. She twisted the top off and added a gulp's worth to her drink. She tried a test sip...and then added more water. Sula giggled at her efforts.

"Oh I..." Mrs. Tam glanced up. "I don't mean to offend."

The lamia raised a hand. "I'm not offended. The newer husbands of my tribe always need time to adjust their palettes to our cooking." She shrugged a shoulder. "And of course vice-versa when they bring over new recipes for us to try. Finding a good balance that can satisfy all tastes..." She rolled her eyes up. "Isn't an impossible task, but using the same method over and over just because it pleases everyone gets dull after a time."

Mrs. Tam reared her head with a grunt. "Ugh, tell me about it. My husband came back from the war damn near addicted to microwavable dinners. They're serviceable in a pinch but I was not going to allow that to be a staple for my children. So I banned him from buying those. When he objected I told him he'd eat the meal I make for everyone else at my table or he can get his own table." She nodded firmly. "He tested me on that once. I got Calvin and Chloe together, put my casserole in tupperware and drove to my sister's to have an impromptu dinner there."

Sula blinked a couple times. "Drove to... you're sister's?" She shut her eyes a moment. "Oh I get it. You put a considerable physical gap between you and your husband."

Mrs. Tam glanced over. "Well yeah, she lives about ten minutes outside of..." She held up a finger. "You're from an island, and all your siblings are within walking distance."

Sula chuckled. "Slithering distance," She corrected. "but I think I get it." She affirmed with a nod. "He didn't go hungry, but he would eat alone." She shivered. "Ugh, that's, ugh." Her head shook lazily. "Just thinking about that, when I could eat with any of my family but they insist on being separate...ugh."

Mrs. Tam smirked a bit...then a thought occurred. "But weren't you...alone during you're time waiting, until Jack started hosting you?"

Sula nodded her head side to side. "Yes and no." She waved an arm. "The apartment by the Exchange office where unassigned students live has a community kitchen on each floor. They didn't have the best ingredients, but they allowed anyone to cook in there, as long as they didn't cook only for themselves." She inclined her chin and took a sip of her drink. "The cover story was that there wasn't enough space for everyone to just cook for themselves, but I think that they wanted as many liminals to eat and converse with each other for socializing sake."

The other woman scrunched an eye. "You didn't have a kitchen in your apartment?"

Sula shook her head negatively. "No, they didn't want us to 'settle' in there. It was temporary housing. They didn't want us to start thinking of our room as home. No matter how long it took to be assigned a host."

"Mmm I see." She placed a finger on her chin. "All that waiting must have been so hard for you."

Sula shut her eyes for a moment. "No, it wasn't the waiting that was painful." Mrs. Tam glanced over apprehensively.

"It was all the rejections."

Despite the ruckus of the child-war mere meters in front of them, there was a dead zone of melancholic silence bridging the two women.

The human reached across the table gently. "I'm so sorry that happened to you."

The monster opened her eyes and lightly grasped her hand. "Thank you." A pause. "I've tried to keep that from..." She sighed. "It's not like I didn't understand." A blink. "I know exactly how dangerous I am. My tribe trains us in the many, many ways we can hurt a human, so we know what to avoid." She breathed out. "It just felt so unfair..that...that..."

Evelyn nodded. "That you can do everything right and still fail." Sula raised her eyes at her. "That's life."

The echidna stared for a long almost awkward moment. And then... "That's what Matriarch Carla told me...warned me. Right before I got on the boat." She dipped her head. "At first I thought she was being mean...but...I suppose she was trying to...prepare me."

Mrs. Tam smiled. "It took a lot of guts to leave. And quite a bit more for your family to let you go." She released her hand. "I think...that's what I'm starting to appreciate about you homestays. How bold you all are."

Sula smirked. "Oh we have boldness alright." She let that hand go and faced back to the War of the Lawn. "Our problem is that we usually have too much of it." Evelyn nodded in sympathetic agreement.

The final combatants of each faction had exhausted their initial ammunition reserves and were forced to scour the grounds around them to replenish their means of foam and plastic death. Nicole Valander focused on resupplying Captain Maria's dart-thrower while Kevin Catrelli performed the same duty for Admiral-General Priscilla.

In the middle of the war a familiar box van slowed by the curb and parked. Both mothers blinked and glanced at each other. Then they faced back to the vehicle and blinked again.

"Oh no." Sula despaired as the occupants exited and stood near the curb.

"That's Agent Smythe right?" Evelyn queried. "Who...what the heck is that other one?"

Sula eyed the woman with small white horns and lion-like nose next to agent Smythe and frowned. "Our 'last' homestay."

Calvin and Chloe's mother sucked in a breath through her teeth. "Jack left with Tetra hours ago. They're not going to be back soon right?"

Sula shook her head and studied the dark furred liminal walking up the curb. "Nope. Goddess damn it Smythe. Why do you never call ahead?"

---

Mishi carefully observed the human and monster children. Her dark eyes took in as much detail as she could.

Most of the human children were splayed out on the grass unmoving. Two others seemed to be warily searching for small blue tubes with an orange tip on one end.

The lamia children brandished wildly painted 'firearms' and attempted to shoot each other. The 'bullets' seemed to be those blue tubes that were scattered across the lawn.

"Is this normal behavior at this household?" She asked the human agent standing to her left.

Smythe's brow raised a degree. "No..." He answered carefully. "But I must say I'm delighted to see humans and liminals playing together, safely."

Mishi lowered one eye. "This is...play?"

The agent chuckled. "A bit aggressive for my tastes but yes, this is play. I believe it is called a nerf war."

Her ears flicked once. "War is a type of play among humans?"

He nodded. "When its fought with toys and overseen by responsible adults." He pointed at the lounging human woman and fully grown lamia across the lawn. "No one should get hurt and Sula is trained in first aid for humans and her own species in case an accidental injury occurs."

Mishi blinked a couple times. "I see." She paused moment. "Could I participate in this...nerf war?"

Smythe snorted. "Let's introduce you first." He strode behind her and picked a path to avoid the fray. She followed but kept an eye on the combatants, attempting to discern their fighting style.

"Missus Peri, Missus Tam." Smythe announced. "I'd like to introduce your newest guest." He waved a hand toward the Mishipeshu. "Mishi? Would you like to say hello?"

She blinked and turned away from the fracas. "Yes, yes I would." She bowed low. "Thank you for accepting me into your home."

The human woman giggled. "Oh it's not my home." Mishi raised her head in mild befuddlement. "I'm one of Jack's neighbors."

She raised her eyes a moment and stood straight. "Very well. Where is the master of the house? I should present myself to him."

"Jack's not here actually." The lamia stated. Smythe and Mishi cocked their heads.

"Where did he go?" The agent demanded.

"He took Tetra to see her human family."

...

Smythe didn't move. In fact he didn't even seem to breathe for a whole ten seconds. Mishi wasn't sure how to react.

This...'Tetra' was a complete mystery to her. And the only person who might give her some context seemed to have lost their ability to speak. And possibly think.

She slowly raised an arm, gradually extending a claw towards him. Her eyes flicked to the other women briefly to gauge their response.

The lamia held up a 'smart' phone with a small light shining out of it. "Hold that pose a second." Mishi's brow furrowed. "Okay perfect." She turned away and began typing rapidly with her gloved thumb-claws. "Annnnnd posted."

The human woman failed to suppress a chortle. She deliberately turned her gaze back to the field and sipped from her cup, a smirk stuck in place.

Mishi glanced back at the agent, her claw hovered inches from his arm. She was tempted to poke him when he finally blinked and leaned forward. "I see."

The lamia's smile widened as she eyed the agent. "Didn't know about them at all did you?"

He folded his arms and chided the amused monster-woman. "All arachne have a human family." He turned his eyes toward Mishi. "Is there something you need?"

She blinked and lowered her arm. "Uh...no. I was...concerned." The other two women giggled.

Agent Smythe shut his eyes for a second. "I will have to add another detail to her file." He leaned forward and fixed the lamia with his gaze. "Please inform Jack that I would like a call from him when he arrives."

The lamia grinned widely and cocked her head. "Oh, like you call ahead before you show up with a completely new responsibility for him to look after?" The agent's mouth pursed. "Of course I'll let him know." She turned her belly over and slid off the lawn chair. She extended her arm toward the new girl. "Come on Mishi. I'll show you around the house and you can pick out your room."

She took a full step back. "I was informed..." She deliberately glanced at the agent to her right. "That my room was already prepared."

The lamia adjusted her face askance. "Oh?"

"Reginald informed me yesterday that he completed the indoor pool in the basement." Smythe said.

The lamia blinked. "Pool? Is that what they were building down there?"

The human woman perked up. "I didn't know you had a pool."

Smythe leaned forward. "Reginald didn't tell you what his crew were constructing?"

The lamia shook her head. "He told us not to go in there. That it was some sort of surprise for our final guest."

The human woman raised a hand. "I'm confused. Is the pool supposed to be a room?"

Mishi turned toward her and answered. "I prefer to sleep underwater." Both women reared their head.

"Oh an aquatic species." The lamia recovered. "That's so warm."

"Amphibious, technically." Agent Smythe raised a finger.

"Even better." The lamia nodded.

The human woman blinked a few times. "Amphibious? With fur?"

Mishi nodded. "I am a Mishipeshu."

Their reactions varied. The human woman seemed even more confused. The lamia on the other hand...

"Oh, I've heard of you!" Her face brightened with recognition. "You're native to this continent, right? My mermaid friends would sometimes talk about your people."

She closed her eyes and nodded. "My family line has dwelt in the 'great lakes' ,as human's call them, since the beginning. There are many mermaids that also call them home."

The human woman blinked. "So you're American? I've never heard of you."

Smythe raised a finger again. "They actually have dual citizenship with us and Canada."

"Hey mama? Who's this?" The quad was interrupted by one of the lamia children. The four all glanced over. The whole throng of kids were standing around. Several were looking up at Mishi with glossy curious eyes.

She stepped forward and bowed formally. "Greetings. I am called Mishi. I am a Mishipeshu."

The tallest human child frowned. "Your parents named you after your species?"

Mishi shook her head. "No. The human official who greeted me and asked me questions had difficulty pronouncing my name."

"Oh." The girl glanced down a moment and then back up. "What's your real name?"

"I am Atabey Gendewytha." Atabey informed.

The two lamia children frowned and looked over at Smythe. "Atabey Gendewytha? What's so hard about that?" The human children also repeated her name several times. Like trying on new clothes.

Atabey turned back to the adult trio behind her. "Was I misinformed? I was told that it would ease communication if I adopted that 'nickname'." The two adult women also looked over at Smythe.

The agent clenched both fists and a prominent ripple in his cheeks clearly indicated grinding of teeth. Atabey stepped back. Anger was not a response she was expecting to her question.

After a few moments he breathed out his nose and straightened his posture. "I am going to fillet Gary." He grumbled.

The newcomer was not sure how to react to an impromptu death threat. So she just stood in place.

"Thank you for informing me of that miss... Gendewytha, I will update your file at the soonest." His eyes hardened. "And probably build a guillotine right afterward."

Atabey took a larger step back from the irate agent.

"Bwahahaha!" The adult lamia doubled over and held a hand to her mouth.

Atabey blinked and warily eyed the woman laughing. "I do not see how the construction of an execution device is amusing."

The human woman smiled and faced her. "He's joking. He's not actually going to kill anyone."

"Don't be so sure." Smythe remarked darkly.

Atabey took another large step away. Her tail poised to fight or flee.

"Ahahahahaha!" The elder lamia was hysterical and planted a hand to keep her torso from hitting the ground. She started pounding the dirt with a fist in her other hand.

"Oh no." One of lamia children lamented. "Mama's got into a laughing fit again."

"She'd been doing so well this year too." The other commented.

"S-sorry hehe." She waved a hand toward the crowd, tears streaming down her face. "I'm so sorry. Hehehaha. I can't- I can't stop. Hehaha!"

"Come on Mama, let's get you a drink and inside." The child with verdant hair took one of her mother's arms and an unopened water bottle. The pair slithered toward the open garage door and slipped inside. She was still giggling and hooting.

"Yeesh." The eldest human child exclaimed. "We didn't even tickle her this time."

"It's not that." The red-headed lamia shook her head. "Sometimes, if she thinks something's really funny she'll keep laughing like that for the better part of an hour. Tickling her is a physiological reaction." She waved toward the garage. "That happens when she hears a joke she really likes. It repeats over and over in her mind and gets stuck. So she just keeps laughing at it."

"Maria." Agent Smythe got her attention. "Would you be so kind to gather miss Gendewytha's cases and get them inside with me?"

Maria gave a sharp salute. "Can do agent Smythe." And she slithered toward the back of the van.

Atabey wasn't entirely sure what to do with herself. Her possibly murderous escort was handling her luggage and the only other guests she would be staying with were...elsewhere.

Apparently sensing her distress, the human lady stood up and nodded. "How about you head on inside and try to find Syleris or Dawn?"

"I..umm.." Atabey stammered.

"Ugh, we can play nicely by ourselves without you mom." The eldest human child exasperated. "Just go with her."

The human lady gave her daughter a sharp look, but nodded after a second. "Alright. No rough housing and no one gets hurt understand?"

"Understood." "We got it Missus Tam." "We'll be fine mommy."

She jerked her head toward the house. "Come on. I don't think they'll mind if I give you a tour 'til we come across one of them."

Atabey fell in at Missus Tam's side. "You...command your children well."

She laughed in her throat. "I'll take that as a compliment."

Atabey blinked. "I meant it as a compliment."

Missus Tam laughed again. "You take things quite literally don't you?"

Atabey closed her eyes a moment and took in a breathe. Missus Tam stopped and held up a hand. "I'm sorry. Did I offend you?"

She shook her head. "No..." Her eyes opened again and faced forward. "My people use plenty of idioms for communicating ideas." She faced the other woman. "But humans and many terrestrial...liminals are unfamiliar with our speech. I've attempted to avoid idioms and to be more direct with my communication." She pressed her lips together a moment. "But I am worried that...I have...that I appear to be...something I am not." Her brow furrowed.

"Hmmm, Alright." Mrs. Tam nodded. "How about you tell me a mishipeshu idiom?"

Atabey blinked. "But you won't understand it."

She shrugged. "So explain it to me afterward, and I'll try to think of a similar American expression."

Atabey blinked again. "Very well. You're no muskellunge."

It was Mrs. Tam's turn to blink. "I hope you did not just insult me."

She shook her head. "It is not an insult. 'You're no muskellunge' has at least two common meanings. Both of which apply to you." She held up one claw. "The most prominent one is that you are authentic."

The other woman nodded. "Oh, thank you. I think"

Atabey held up another claw. "The other meaning is that you are aesthetically pleasing to observe."

She lightly smiled and nodded again. "Thank you again." The human blinked a couple times. "What is a muskellunge anyway?"

Atabey put down that hand. "A species of fish that my people consume for nourishment."

"Huh..okay..." Mrs. Tam's head tilted. "Do you know where those meanings come from?"

Atabey nodded. "Muskellunge are considered the ugliest fish in the great lakes by my people. The other meaning comes from a story."

"A youth was sent to capture a sturgeon for his tribe. Unable to do so, he caught several muskellunge instead and attempted to disguise them as under-sized sturgeons. His deception was discovered by an adolescent who exclaimed 'that's no sturgeon' when she examined his catch."

"Huh, interesting." Mrs. Tam nodded slowly. "And 'you're no muskellunge' was derived out of that."

Atabey nodded. "Yes. Do you have a similar idiom?" She asked.

"Oh yes," She exclaimed. "The first that sprang to my mind was, 'I'm no spring chicken anymore'."

Atabey narrowed her eyes. "My first thought was, 'of course you're not'."

Mrs. Tam smirked. "I'll take that as a compliment again." She cleared her throat. "'I'm no spring chicken' means that I am no longer young. It is a self-deprecating expression."

Atabey placed a claw by her chin. "Hmm. Humans domesticate and consume chickens. The term 'spring' refers to the season does it not?"

The other woman nodded. "I believe so. Chickens would be sold at market when they are very young." She shrugged. "Probably during the spring. I should probably look up the actual meaning and send it to you."

"I would appreciate that." The mishipeshu smiled. "And, I believe you are still young. Therefore that idiom does not apply to you."

Mrs. Tam's face brightened. "Well thank you." A pause. "You know that Agent Smythe wasn't angry at you earlier right?"

"I...am still unsure." Her expression softened. "But I will defer to a human's judgment of another human's behavior." She took in a breath. "Very well, Agent Smythe is not angry with me." She told herself.

Mrs. Tam shook her head. "No, he was angry for you. You shouldn't have to go by a simple nickname if you would prefer your real name instead."

Atabey nodded. "Yes...I was very annoyed by that restriction." Her eyes furrowed and she placed her hands by her hips. "I think I understand now." Her tail lashed once. "This...'Gary's' inadequate conduct is...irritating. I will have to reintroduce myself to everyone else I've met as 'Mishi' to correct his blunder."

Missus Tam chuckled. "How about we get you moved in first?"

---

Tetra tapped a leg on the floor of the van. The safety harness chafed on her shoulders as the vehicle swayed in motion. She kept her hands busy with simple string figures like Bear's Den, Dog on a Leash, and Cats' Cradle.

"Nervous?" Jack asked from the driver's seat.

Her eyes focused toward the center rear view mirror. Though she couldn't see his full expression she could discern that he was only curious not ambivalent.

"No...I don't want to be late."

He smirked lightly. "We'll be there soon enough. We're almost there." He glanced at his phone screen. "Just a few more minutes."

She tried to still her leg but it kept tapping.

Maybe I am nervous?

She put away her string and retrieved the jewelry box she'd taken from her mother's cave, so many years ago.

I've carried this for so long...

She sighed. And closed her eyes.

Part of the journey is the end...Now it can be back with people it belongs to.

She replaced it into the backpack she was borrowing from Jack and gripped the top of the seat in front of her. She thought about all the times she asked her mother about father. And only getting lies and half-truths in return. Her claws tightened, as every slap and humiliating 'punishment' replayed through her mind's eye.

"Tetra?"

She sucked in a breath and released the seat. Damn you mother. Not now!

"Are we there yet?" She tried to not make that sound like a needy demand.

"Yep." Her boyfriend answered. "Making the last turn now. Should be on our right soon. Make sure you put your shoes back on."

Tetra blinked several times at that last nonsensical comment. "Jack I don't wear shoes."

He chuckled. "Sorry, it's an old car trip joke. I'll explain it later."

….Weird human is weird.

She gazed out the side door window.

And now I'm going to meet more humans.

Her eyes closed one more time.

'The best way to learn something is to just do it.' 'Don't let your doubts become another obstacle.'

Tetra let the mistress's words echo and embolden her.

"And I'm not alone." She smiled.

"Aaannnd we're here!" Jack announced as the van came to a complete stop.

The arachne held her eyes closed but went through the motions of releasing her harness and lowering the central bench by memory and touch. She slowly rotated around and waited to hear the back doors open.

A breathe held as her driver approached the back and gripped the handle.

Thank you Emilia.

All six eyes snapped open and she surged forward as the doors parted. She ignored the ramp's release lever, hopped out and turned to the house they were parked in front of.

While hardly as impressive as her own domicile, the two story brick structure with an attached two car garage stood clean and sturdy. Four unlit lamps bordered the two doors and nine windows faced out toward the street. Between front door and the central upper window were two flags. The American one on the right and the Spanish one on the left.

A small tree just under the height of the house stood some distance away from the street-side corner. The outline of the house was overshadowed by several more trees that marked the property's rear border. Two small bushes stood in the mulch covered space between the front door and the garage.

Further behind the house a small handful of children played in a local park. Tetra could hear the occasional squeals of excitement. And for a moment she was transported back to the Vienna woods. And meeting the colony of arachne that called that forest home.

"Come on." Jack invited. "He texted to come around back right?"

She nodded quietly and followed. A narrow dirt path that deviated from the sidewalk lead around the garage and ended at a concrete slab below a side door. Jack proceeded past it and stopped at a short beige metal fence. "Hello." He announced. Though the fence was hardly a deterrent to one with legs and agility like hers, Tetra recognized the property border and honored it by stopping just to her boyfriend's right.

Five human faces, two adults and three children, all gazed toward Jack's call.

A boy and a girl in their late teens stared from a large metal table with stone slabs. The girl was dressed in jeans and a pastel stripped long-sleeve and white sneakers.

The boy sported a black Re:Zero T-shirt and dark gray khaki pants with large zipper pockets. He wore black sandals and dark sunglasses over his brow. Between them was an array of colorful cards and a pair of decks each.

The third child, a boy around Calvin's age, wore a blue t-shirt and jean shorts. His feet dangled just above the grass in Velcro fastened shoes. He held an electronic device with a blue and red end in each hand.

The adult female adjusted a large wide brimmed white straw hat with a brown stripe. On off-white summer dress fell just above a pair of heeled black sandals. A large golden ring twinkled from her left hand.

And behind a large lightly smoking grill Tetra recognized the other man from her father's photo. A few wrinkles had crept around his eyes and some salt had been dashed onto his temples, but it was definitely the man that had hunted her mother.

"Aha! There she is!" The mocha skinned man raised a pair of tongs. "Come in come in!"

Jack nodded and reached around for the gate latch. He lifted it and pushed the gate inward for her. Tetra skittered into the yard.

"Welcome to the Velasquez household." The pale skinned woman in the summer dress announced and approached them. "You must be Jack." She held out her hand and Jack took it.

"Missus Velasquez, thank you for having us." Jack stated.

"Please, call me Max."

He nodded. "Max it is then."

She nodded and faced the arachne. "And you are my long-lost niece Tetra." Both arms opened for a hug. "Welcome."

Tetra paused for but a moment. Just do it. Then she completed the embrace. Mrs. Velasquez was easily a half-head taller than Jack and Tetra didn't have to dip quite so low to wrap her arms comfortably around this particular human.

They parted and Hector joined right by his wife. "It is so good to finally meet you." He went in for a hug, and Tetra didn't hesitate this time.

She held onto him and pressed her eyes shut, vainly suppressing the couple of tears that started leaking out of them. "Goddess, I...I didn't..." She pulled back and stared into her uncle's light brown eyes. "I promised myself I wouldn't cry this soon." A wet chuckle escaped her throat.

He chuckled back. "Oh I'll get there too mi sobrina."

He took in a breath and let it out slowly. "Kids get over here."

The two boys and girl placed their toys on the table and joined their parents. "Tetra, these are your cousins." He waved at the older children. "Twins, Tara and Thomas." Both of them gave awkward waves.

"Hello." "Hi."

"And this is Antonio." The youngest stared up at her with glossy dark eyes.

Tetra waved back to the older ones and dipped down as low as she could for the last one. "Hello."

The boy stared for a few more seconds. And then his mouth opened. "Do you ever forget how to walk?"

One of her eyes scrunched and she tilted her head. "I... don't think I have?"

He pointedly looked at her lower appendages. "You have so many legs. How do you keep them all moving without tripping over yourself?"

Tetra hummed and leaned back up. "That's an interesting question." She gazed down at him. "What made you think that I wouldn't be able to walk properly with all my legs."

He held up a hand. "It's the centipede's lema."

Thomas rolled his eyes. "Centipede's dilemma." He corrected. "Sorry about that, he got into one of my sci-fi books one day and ran across that concept."

Tetra shook her head. "No need to apologize." She rested a claw on her chin. "I suppose from a bipedal's perspective this would be fairly challenging." She paced each pair in a row without actually taking a step. "Incidentally, what is this centipede's dilemma?"

Thomas raised a finger. "It's the fear of... something about centipedes forgetting how to walk. I can't remember exactly how it's stated."

Jack took a step forward. "It proposes a question: What if a centipede stopped and tried to think about how it is moving all of its legs. The action of walking is normally automatic once it is learned, the brain can send signals to each appendage without conscious effort. But actively thinking about how you're doing all of that would supposedly interfere with the operation."

"Huh..." The arachne glanced up. "I suppose that can be tested rather easily." She pivoted a full three hundred and sixty degrees in place. "So far so good." She winked at Antonio. "Let's try something more challenging." She drew out some thread from her spinneret and skittered to a nearby tree that marked the edge of the backyard. Her legs nimbly gripped the bark and she ascended a good six or seven feet. One whole circumference around the trunk later she hopped off and scuttled back toward the group.

"Here, this is for you." She held out a single white handkerchief with 'Antonio' embroidered on the bottom.

The whole rest of the family was astonished.

"How did you?" "Where did that?" "Did you bring that with you?"

The master weaver just smirked as her cousin took the gift. His eyes vacillated between the handkerchief and her.

"No dilemma there." Jack commented while eyeing Thomas. "Which sci-fi book?"

The teen rattled his head. "Uh..something Star, by uh Heinlein and one of his buddies I think."

"Variable Star?" Jack proposed.

Thomas glanced up and to the side. "Y-yeah that sounds right."

Jack nodded. "I think I have that one too."

The youth snapped his attention back. "You read sci-fi?"

He nodded. "Among other genre's but yes."

"Cool. None of my friends actually read sci-fi. They just watch the movies."

"What other genre's?" Tara asked with interest. "Do you read fantasy?"

Jack chuckled. "Let me tell you this, I bought a Star Wars and a Drizzt novel from BAB less than a month ago."

The twins glanced at each other and then back to Jack. "You're our new favorite person now." "We're adopting you. You have no choice, resistance is useless."

Jack laughed heartily and craned his neck up to address his homestay. "I think they're making a claim for me."

The mistress's eyes narrowed and she settled her arms possessively over his shoulders and around his neck. "Hmmm I will allow limited visits." She raised a claw as Jack rolled his eyes. "Under strict supervision and only for arranged dates and times. I retain the right to cancel each session at my whim."

The twins folded their arms. "Six hours minimum per visit." "And bring snacks."

"Four hours." Tetra countered. "And you'll distribute my weaving products."

Her host sighed and gazed over at the elder Velasquez's. "Well, this is going splendidly."

"Hush Jack." Tetra remarked with a greedy grin. "I'm bartering you. And setting the foundation for my future fashion empire." She waved a claw. "Nepotism is important in these things."

Max pressed her lips together, cheeks trembling. Gales of laughter threatened to erupt from her throat.

Hector shook his head bemused. "How about we eat?"

"Oh yeah!" "Let's do that." "I'm hungry!"

Tetra nodded and stood up fully. "A lunch break before resuming negotiations is approved." Jack turned around in place and glared at his girlfriend. "Something you wish to say, Jack?"

He forced himself to utter the following through his teeth: "I love you Tetra. I love you a lot."

She dipped down and pulled him in by his jaw for a passionate kiss. His irritation at her started cracking and he fought it a for a few moments.

The hell are you doing fool? Kiss her back!

Self-respect and sensual desire grappled in his soul. Per their usual tactics, sensual desire kneed self-respect in the groin. Hard.

Jack reached up and held her arms.

Self-respect crumpled into a fetal position.

He leaned into the kiss.

Sensual desire planted their foot on self-respect's head and declared victory.

The rest of the world was silent. Unimportant.

Then Tetra broke off the kiss. "I was just playing Jack. I'd never give you up for anyone. For anything."

Self-esteem bulldozed over sensual desire with a truck and hauled self-respect into the passenger seat.

He breathed out and kept his eyes shut a moment. "I know. Thank you Tetra."

She nodded lightly. "You're quite welcome."

The pair stepped away from each other and joined the other humans for grilled burgers, brats and fajitas.

---

Atabey beheld the freshly painted steel double doors. Such a starkly industrial exterior did not bode well in her mind. She idly stroked the key she'd been given back at the Exchange office.

"Is something wrong?"

The slim blonde girl that would be her closest neighbor tilted her head and tried to read her face.

"I am...not sure we are in the right place." She answered as diplomatically as she could.

Dawn flicked her eyes between the door and Atabey and hummed. "I'm pretty confident you are." She waved at the doors. "Reggie and his crew were down here working the past three days."

The mishipeshu hesitated.

"Why don't you try the key at least." She suggested.

Atabey sighed and stepped forward, raising the trinket. It slipped into the handle's lock easily and clicked. She twisted the knob and pushed it in.

The sound of falling water echoed into the basement. She blinked rapidly and then gazed around. "What...in the lowest...?

Dawn stepped up right by her and sucked in a breath. "Wow. Reggie went all out."

If she didn't know any better, Atabey would have sworn she'd stepped into a grotto on Manitoulin Island.

Directly across from their position, one wall was dominated by a natural looking rock face. It wrapped around the the entire room. The ground was also covered in natural rock tiles. An unbroken swath of gray slate covered the ceiling. A series of small lights ringed the angle where the ceiling met the wall.

A stream of water from the far right rock wall fell into a massive pool that engulfed over three fourths of the surface of the room. Atabey stepped forward and gazed into its clear depths. It had to be at least five meters deep and lined with more smooth rocks. The bottom was covered entirely with sand and small pebbles.

She knelt by the edge and promptly slipped into the pool. It was cool but not too cool. She shimmied her tail and kicked, propelling herself to the bottom. Her claws dug into the sand and loosened particles floated about as she brought it to her snout. Curious, she dropped her handful and plunged her arm as deep as she could. It was up to her shoulder and her claws hadn't encountered the true bottom of the pool.

Amazing.

She glanced about and withdrew her arm. By all appearances, she should be hundreds of miles away in a cave by Lake Huron. There was nothing...wait.

What's that?

A shadow in the rock wall seemed too straight to be natural. As she swam closer she could sense the water being pulled away with her whiskers. She ran her hand along the wall and found an industrial smooth edge.

Ah...that's how they're keeping it filtered and clean.

She swam parallel to the wall and found more intake pipes, disguised as minor outcroppings.

There must be a dozen pumps for this whole pool. Where are they? How do they change out the filters? And where is it flowing back in?

Atabey glanced up at the spot where the man-made waterfall was disturbing the surface. Except from this angle she could tell there was something else flowing in. She swam up to about half a meter below and found what she was looking for.

A grid of small pipes fed water back into the pool. Each was disguised with more manufactured stone outcroppings.

Clever...and appreciated.

She emerged near the entrance. Smooth cuts into the side of the pool served as a submerged landing. A pair of dark ropes hung from indentations in the wall on either side to assist people getting in and out.

Dawn smiled and offered her hand but Atabey ignored it and stepped out.

"I take it, that you are satisfied?"

It was just then that she realized that she was smiling, had been smiling. Probably since she hit the water.

"Yes. Oh yes yes yes. This is more than I ever hoped." She stated satisfactorily.

"I'm glad you like it." Dawn nodded. "I think your bedroom is over there." Dawn strolled over to the wall opposite the waterfall. She placed her hand on a rounded section of rock and gripped under it. She pulled and a large rectangular section of the wall came away on a long hinge.

"Oh my." She padded over and shook her arms and tail to shed the water that clung to her fur. Just inside the hidden door a slate tiled floor led to a large bathroom. To the left and right of that was a carpeted traditional bedroom. The right side contained a queen-sized bed and walk-in closet. The left side had a large desk and wooden cabinets.

She noticed something extra in the bathroom. A full sized shower was expected but there was another chamber on the opposite corner that was walled off with opaque glass. "Huh, what's that for?"

She walked up to it and pulled the handle. Inside, one wall was a series of vents. The other held stacks of built-in fans. The corner in-between featured a number of switches and dials. Reckless curiosity spurred her to flip the largest one at the top to the 'on' position.

A hum of power resounded in the chamber from above. She looked up and saw a massive fan spinning up. The air beat down on her in seconds and she closed her eyes, letting the remaining dampness from the pool drip away from her body.

"Oh, that is cool."

Atabey turned around and noted that Dawn had followed her in. She held up her hands. "My apologies, I suppose I wasn't invited."

Atabey shook her head and flipped off the fan. "You are not intruding." She held up a claw. "In fact, if you assist me with putting my belongings in here, you'll earn a standing invitation to my pool."

The other woman nodded. "Accepted. What do you want to grab first?"

---

"So we ran that lead from the Apennine colony down." Hector explained. "Crossed the sea. Made our way to the local colony there...and...they hadn't seen her or heard from her. In months. Well before she killed my brother." He glanced down at the table. "And we scoured every mile, every cave, everywhere we could think of that an arachne could hide in." A breath. "But it was too much."

"And she got away."

Max placed a hand on her husband's shoulder but didn't say anything.

Tetra shook her head. "She didn't get away." They both glanced up at her. "I was there when Mistress Khristeen took her confession and apprehended her for the Spanish authorities." Her claws curled in. "I tried to kill her."

Hector pursed his lips like he wanted to say something, but he only nodded.

Jack took his homestay's hand. She didn't react.

"They caught her and she's in prison." Max stated. "That's what matters."

Tetra and her uncle shared a brief look. One that conveyed a more bloody minded conversation. One that would have to be unspoken...for now.

Jack perked his head up at Max. "So...did you...know about Tulio before the reveal?"

She snorted. "At first when he mentioned that his brother was murdered and the killer was never caught, it intrigued me." She tapped her free hand on the table. "At the time, I was a paralegal for a law-firm that handles international trade deals and financing. So I was marginally aware of Spanish criminal code."

"I researched his case as a side project. I called it a courtesy for repairing my useless first husband's house so quickly. What surprised me was that Tulio was considered missing, presumed dead, not murdered. He was the only witness on the file," She thumbed at her husband. "But his statement was ruled as unreliable."

"There was a note at the end, hand-written, that mentioned he left the police station in the company of a paranormal investigator, Emilia Wolfe."

Max smirked and shook her head. "I'm a sucker for a good mystery, so I researched her next." She leaned back. "You know that Johnny Cash song "I've Been Everywhere"?"

Jack narrowed his eyes at the non-sequitur but nodded his comprehension.

"Her case files could be used to make an international version of that song."

He leaned back a degree, but Tetra nodded confidently. "I've not heard that song but I believe I understand the core of what you are saying."

"Good." Max continued. "She posts several of her files on a website maintained by other paranormal investigators. There were links to government databases and even more resources for requesting an investigator look into a new case."

"One of her cases claimed to have occurred in my hometown, Silver City, New Mexico. It claimed to have resolved a series of reoccurring thefts from the Sylvia Creek Brewery and Distillery."

She raised a finger. "I remembered that incident. My father complained about not getting a 'decent drink in this town' for over a couple of weeks."

"The case claimed that a cactus cat was sneaking in and stealing whole crates of craft beer."

The term didn't mean anything to Jack but Tetra nodded confidently.

"You've heard of them?" Max asked.

"Oh yes." The arachne answered. "They have a well-earned reputation for being drunken loud-mouthed louts."

Jack furrowed his brow. "What are they?"

Max cocked her head. "Pretty much exactly like they sound. Think of a large wild cat like a mountain lion and then replace their fur with cacti spines everywhere."

Jack rattled his shoulders. "Egh...not exactly hug-able, are they?"

Max giggled and shook her head. "Nope, not at all." She dipped her chin. "At the time I thought it was ridiculous and I was going to drop the whole thing." She placed a finger on the side of her cheek. "Then I remembered an underclassman, Juan Rodrigo bragging that his parents helped solve the thefts." Shepointed that finger vaguely toward them. "So I dove back into the case and there it was. 'Statements from the Rodrigo family provided data to track down the local cactus cat den'."

She sat back and folded her arms. "I had no idea what I had stumbled into. The whole thing rattled my very understanding of the world." She closed her eyes. "Cactus cats were real? Are Jackelopes real? Are Chupacabras?"

Jack glanced over at his girlfriend who nodded affirmatively.

"I had to find out more." She turned to her husband and mock glared. "And it all started with him."

Hector leaned forward and clasped his hands. "At first I didn't know what she really wanted. I kept on getting requests from more and more clients. And I kept on hearing 'Oh Maxine Clubber recommended you.' She's a very good friend.'" A pause." When the work finally got done I was sitting flush and decided to buy dinner for her and her family as a thank you for recommending me so many times."

"I asked Mr. Clubber about a family restaurant they liked and I made reservations. Dinner went well, until she cornered me and asked about Emilia." He shook his head. "I had no idea where she learned that name and I was so off-guard that I blurted: She's the woman who tried to help me find my brother's killer.'"

Max leaned back in. "Right then, I knew I had to get to the bottom of whatever this was. Who had killed Tulio? What had killed Tulio? Were monsters really out there killing humans? And nobody knew about it?" She eyed Tetra a moment. A degree of horror shaded her expression. "Not that..um...all monsters..."

Tetra held up a hand. "I am not offended. Your questions and fears were entirely legitimate considering the lack of knowledge about us you possessed." She folded her arms. "I've heard that humans fear what they don't understand." She closed her eyes briefly. "What does annoy me is the implied assumption in that maxim." Her eye opened intensely. "That only humans are capable of that fear."

She let that insight linger a moment before righting her posture.

Hector nodded. "We'll, we met several more times, and I told her everything I knew about monsters and Emilia." He sniffed. "I was so glad I had another person who believed me, to talk to about this."

"Miss Wolfe pursued other cases after you lost track of Rosalinde, didn't she?" Jack stated. "Why'd you come to America?"

Hector's eyes dipped, "I couldn't come back home. My whole family thought I was a foolish idiot. I thought I was an idiot." He glanced to the side. "And I was sick of Europe by then."

Tetra immediately laid her hand on top of his. He gazed up into her eyes. "You are not an idiot." He smiled and accepted her encouragement.

Jack held a pensive expression as he took in their tale. "I do have one question." Hector and Max turned their attention to him. "How...exactly were two humans going to capture a fully grown arachne?"

Hector nodded. "That's a very good question. One that I asked Emilia several times. She never gave me an answer until the last day in Macedonia." He swallowed. "I told her I wasn't going to help her anymore unless she told me how we were going to catch her."

"After some more arguing, I made it abundantly clear that I was going to leave unless she gave me a reason to stay." A breath. "She said she had a 'silent partner' that could handle and capture an arachne. All we had to do was confirm a real-time location for Rosalinde and they would handle the rest."

Tetra narrowed her eyes. "Any idea who or what this 'silent partner' is?"

Hector shook his head. "None whatsoever. I left her later that day. Took what little was in my brother's and my savings and found local work." He leaned back. "Did that enough to pack up everything else and leave Europe behind for good. Found work here in the continent and been doing that since."

Tetra paused a moment. "Emilia told me that you both caught up to her a couple times."

Hector nodded lightly. "Yes...but when we found her she must have recognized me or the likeness of my brother and fled. Left most of her stuff behind." One hand curled into a fist. "It only got more difficult after that."

Hector's fist relaxed and an unspoken accord prevented further examination of that particular topic.

Tetra sighed. "I suppose this is as good a time as any." She reached back into a the backpack and retrieved a small item. She placed a jewelry box in front of her uncle.

He blinked at the object, then raised his eyes up with a silent question.

"This was my father's. It was the last thing he gave to my mother." Her jaw clenched. "But she doesn't deserve it. And I have no right to claim it."

Max and Hector shared a look. Then he took the box and flipped open the lid.

"Oh...Wow." Max blinked rapidly, not entirely believing what she was seeing.

Hector on the other hand...

His shoulder's slumped and he shook his head. "That's why there was almost nothing in his account." He shook his head some more.

"This must be worth a small fortune..." Max was still aghast at the item.

Hector lifted up the ring and scrutinized it. "He really loved her, probably proposed to her that very night..." His eyes closed, and he shut the lid. "I accept this." He placed it back on the table and pushed it toward Tetra. "And I'm giving it to you."

The arachne blinked. "I..I can't accept it back-"

His eyes snapped open. "Yes you can. And you will accept a gift from your uncle." His voice was gentle, but would brook no objection.

She rattled in place. Her whole body shook once. One hand curled in and two of her legs raised, like she was about to vault the table.

Her eyes shut and both fists clenched. A heavy breath expelled a sliver of the elation.

"Tetra?" Jack queried.

She ignored his question and skittered around the table. Her uncle stood and she engulfed him in a massive hug.

"Thank you." She whispered.

"You're quite welcome. Mi sobrina."

She chuckled and sobbed. "This...this is the first gift I'd ever received from my family." They held each other as happy tears ran down her face.

Max stood up next to her husband. "Nuestra casa es su casa."

Tetra blinked open one eye and grasped her shoulder. Max joined the hug, slipping one arm behind her husband and the other around her niece's back.

Jack smiled while nodding. This was perfect. And he was just glad he could play his small part in it.

---

Atabey stretched languidly under the over-sized blanket. She laid her arms in front and relaxed her tail between her legs. She was almost ready to nap right then and there on the cushioned table. But she couldn't give feedback if she wasn't conscious, now could she?

A quiet tune played from a speaker and the clip clop of hoof-steps announced that her therapist had arrived.

"Atabey?" Verandys asked. "Are you ready?"

"Yessss." She moaned listlessly.

"And you consent to allowing Syleris to observe?"

"Also yesss."

Another pair of steps preceded the harpy's entrance to the chamber. "Thank you so much."

Atabey waved lazily but didn't look up. "Anything for the advancement of knowledge."

"Yes, for science!" Syleris assented.

"Where would you like me to start?" The centaur asked.

Atabey breathed in and tried to evaluate her physical self. "Pick a spot, I'll let you know if anything needs attention."

"Very good." Her therapist nodded. "Then I shall start with the part I am least familiar with, your tail."

The mishipeshu's only response was a short hum. The blanket was lifted and tucked under her opposite leg. Smooth hands lightly grasped near the base of her tail. "Now, I'll start with light pressure and work my way to the tip."

Content hum.

"Those scales are huge. They're like plates." The harpy commented.

"I said you could observe." Atabey retorted. "Please do so quietly."

"Oh. Right." Syleris gasped. "I'll...just take notes then."

Pen scratches replaced her voice and Atabey was a little irritated. Until the music gained a few decibels and sufficiently drowned out the distraction.

"So Atabey," Her therapist started. "How do you like your homestay so far?"

She grinned. "Oh it's the worst." The pen scratches and her therapist's hands stopped. "My room is spacious and very accommodating," Her arm slipped out and raised two claws. "My roommates have been exceptionally helpful and welcoming." A third claw raised and her therapists hands started working again. "The neighborhood seems to have accepted me as another member of this house." A fourth claw. "And I am addressed by my real name."

The harpy let out a small chuckle. Verandys smirked and adjusted the appendage she was manipulating.

"That sounds absolutely dreadful. You should complain to the host about your problems. He'll definitely listen to you and try to make your stay much better."

"Yeah," Syleris agreed. "Jack is the most awful human I've ever met. He shops and cooks for all of us. Takes us out on fun trips and entertains and teaches us."

Verandys nodded. "He's patient and understanding. Pays attention to our needs." She shook her head dismally. "Probably the worst human I've ever had the displeasure to meet."

Atabey leaned back from the table and gazed almost incredulously at her roommates. "You two caught on to that fast."

The friends shared a mischievous grin. "Oh we like messing with Jack. Almost everyone here does it."

One eye scrunched. "'Messing with him'?"

"Yeah." Syleris exclaimed. "Play tricks on him, flaunt our strengths and skills, try to make him uncomfortable..." Her grin ameliorated. "But not so much that he'll get rid of us."

The centaur nodded. "He makes the most adorable face when he's flustered or annoyed."

Atabey chuckled. "I see." She raised a claw to her lips. "So would you want to play a trick on him when he finally gets back from...wherever he is?"

This time when they looked at each other, their expression were...ambivalent. She cocked her head. "What? What is wrong?"

The harpy halfheartedly raised a wing. "Well, its not like he took too long getting back from the grocery store. He's taking Tetra to see her uncle and his family." She shook her head. "They've never met before."

"Oh, that is..."Atabey started. "That is...amazing."

"Yeah." Syleris nodded. "We're all happy for her. So I...don't think pulling some prank on them would be great."

Verandys raised a finger. "There's a time and place for such things." She held out that hand. "And wouldn't you rather make as best a first impression on him?"

The mishipeshu nodded. "That is...a very good point." Her brow furrowed. "He seems to be an honorable and kind man. I should respect that."

Syleris clapped her wings together. "Oh he's the best. We couldn't have asked for a better host."

"You'll see." Verandys agreed. "Once you have a date with him."

Atabey cocked her head again. "Date? I'm going to date him?"

Verandys raised a finger. "Just one. He likes to get to know his guests on a singular basis."

She glanced to the side. "That...sounds more like an interview."

Syleris shrugged. "What else are first dates?"

Atabey conceded the logic and nodded. "Very well, I will go on this 'date' with my host. She grinned again revealing her fangs. "But afterwards would you two like to..."

"Oh absolutely!" They answered.

The rest of the session's discussion was devoted to dastardly designs and damnable devising...

---

"Oh for...gods dammit Smythe!"

The rest of the household stared at Jack's outburst. He grimaced and closed his eyes. "Sorry." He held up a hand. "Sorry." He attempted to calm himself by letting out a heavy breath.

"What is it Jack?" His girlfriend asked curiously.

He flipped around his phone and displayed a post from their household discord server. "Agent Smythe dropped off Mishi this morning."

She palmed two of her upper eyes. "Conrad..." She hissed virulently. "I am going to string him up over a pit filled with caustic slimes ."

"Please do." Jack assented.

Max cocked her chin. "Why are we talking about murdering a man?"

Jack breathed out again. "Not just a man. He's the Exchange agent that oversees the liminals in my town."

Hector blinked once. "Why are we talking about murdering a government agent?"

"Because..." Tetra waved a hand. "He frequently arrives at the mansion without informing anyone in advance."

He adjusted his jaw. "Does he have to? You know, by law?"

Jack shook his head. "Probably not...but this time he's delivered my last homestay, and I am not there to greet her." His teeth gritted in a valiantly vain effort to contain his rage.

Max gulped. "Oh, do you have to go?"

Tetra and Jack shared a look. He pressed his lips together. Her eyes glistened with longing. He understood and stood up. "Yes, I have to go."

"Oh but," Tara interjected. "We just started another game."

He shook his head and placed his cards near the draw deck. "No, I'm sorry but I'm responsible for all my homestays. I'm the host."

Thomas eyed the arachne in the room. "Doesn't, she, have to go with you?"

Jack shook his head again. "No." He faced her directly. "You're with your family. Literally blood related family." He shook a finger harshly. "If Smythe has a problem with that I'll be damn certain to find a few lawyers who don't."

He confirmed his wallet and retrieved his keys. "I gotta go." He nodded and smiled. "Velasquezes it's been great. Consider yourselves invited into our home." He inclined his head. "Just call or text ahead." His teeth clenched again. "Like a basic courteous adult would do."

Max smiled and nodded. "We'll be sure to do that Jack. Have a safe trip." She waved. Each of her children waved as well.

"Bye." "Goodbye." "See you later."

He turned toward the door and took a step. He was immediately stopped when a hand fell on his shoulder. Tetra and her uncle stood right behind him.

"Jack, before you go." He held out his hand. "I'd like to thank you again. For reuniting my family."

The other man grasped the hand but shook his head. "Emilia Wolfe did the hard part. I just drove her here."

Hector drew him in for a big hug. "You're more than a chauffeur, young man."

Jack smirked and briefly eyed his girlfriend. "Tell that to the rest of my homestays." He stepped back and they parted.

Tetra leaned down and spoke softly. "Thank you Jack. Thank you for bringing me through the last step." She grasped his shoulders and leaned in centimeters from his nose. "No matter what happens, I'll never forget this." Her lips pressed in on his. There was a distinct bittersweet factor to the sensual kiss. "Now go be a good host."

He sighed and nodded. "I will."

Tetra stood fully and watched the best man in her life leave out the front door. She closed it behind him and watched as he mounted into the van and drove away.

When she turned back, her family was waiting for her.

"So...you guys have a mansion?" Thomas asked.

A chortle escaped her throat. "Yes. A triple story structure with a basement." She waved a hand. "I have lain claim to the upper floor." She grinned toothily. "It's my lair."

Tara's eyes boggled. "You have a whole floor to yourself?"

She shrugged. "There's an empty room above the garage right next to mine that no one uses." She grinned again. "If I wanted, I could claim that too." Her claws waved toward herself. "There are perks to weaving my threads into the host."

Thomas grunted. "You sound like a vampire." His expression dropped. "Wait, are vampires real?"

She lost her grin and nodded. "Yes, but there are so few known in the world, that they're practically considered extinct."

Max jutted her head forward. "Did there used to be a lot of them?"

Tetra glanced up. "As I understand it, yes...but they made a grave strategic error hundreds of years ago." She held up a hand toward the rest of them. "When humans developed deadlier and faster weapons, the vampires, fearing their 'natural' dominance challenged, panicked and attempted to cull them. This angered every other species that relies on humans for procreation and other... necessities." She swallowed and spoke on to avoid a entirely separate subject. "And several wars between monsters were waged." She rotated a clawed hand from her elbow laterally, like a scythe. "The vampires and their allies were decimated in the first conflicts. They sued for peace with the coalition and retreated to their castles."

Her eyes intensified. "But no one believed that would be the end of it. Vampires are proud creatures, they don't take losing well. The coalition took steps to watch them afterward." She took a sip from her cup.

"Although never fully declared, the second major war was fought almost entirely in the shadows. The vampires employed their doppelganger allies to infiltrate and destabilize human and coalition strongholds. The coalition responded with kitsune double agents and devil counter-intelligence efforts."

"Seeing their machinations undone at almost every turn, the vampires decided a full-on assault was their best option." She stabbed a claw on the table. "They declared no quarter and no surrender. A final war to claim dominance of the Earth." She paused dramatically. "That arrogance cost them everything."

"Most of their plans were either discovered or bought from traitor doppelgangers for clemency. The coalition was ready for the vampires, and their allies abandoned them in droves, after each crushing defeat."

She raised a claw. "A couple stories I've heard claimed that the last active dragon even assisted the coalition in scouring the strongest vampire castles and defenses."

"Dios..." Hector breathed, his eyes wide as billiards.

"A dragon?" Tara exclaimed. "Dragons are real too?"

Tetra nodded. "They are very real."

"H-have you met one?" Max almost choked.

The arachne shook her head. "No but they're not a threat to anyone if that's what your worried about."

"Why are they not a threat?" Thomas asked.

She shrugged. "They're asleep." She picked up her cup of water and took another sip. Her family all blinked and glanced between themselves.

"How long do dragons sleep?" Antonio asked.

She looked down at him. "They've been asleep for hundreds of thousands of years, most likely much longer."

The boy narrowed his eyes. "Who needs that much sleep? That's just lazy."

Tetra chuckled. "I'll admit I'm not too fond of early mornings myself, but yes...letting entire eons pass me by..." She shook her head. "I'm not brave enough to question a dragon's logic or preferences, but I don't see the appeal."

Hector raised a finger. "You said the last active dragon..." She nodded confirmation. "Is that one still...active?"

Tetra shrugged again. "I'm sure I wouldn't know." She raised a hand. "As I said, I'd only heard the stories. Unlike the war itself, which was meticulously recorded by nearly every participant. Eyewitness accounts of her involvement were passed down orally. Any written confirmable first-hand records have never been recovered. And the monsters still alive from that era have denied those stories."

Tara shook her head incredulously and breathed out. "Still alive from that era..." She repeated. "That's unbelievable."

Tetra sipped some more water. "Elder devils and kitsune live for centuries."

"How long do you live?" Antonio asked.

"Arachne live about as long as humans on average." She answered.

Hector and his wife gazed at each other a moment and then shared a laugh. "I feel like we've been let in on some terrible government secret or something." Max commented.

Tetra shook her head. "Not a secret. But your history books will have to be heavily revised as more and more revelations are disclosed." She smirked. "Consider getting a preview of such knowledge a perk of having an arachne in the family."

"Oh this stuff is great." Thomas nodded vociferously. "Thanks for all that."

"Yeah." Tara exclaimed and looked at her twin. "A shadow war with doppelgangers and kitsune? Hollywood needs to get on that story right now!"

Tetra chuckled at their enthusiasm. "I can tell that you two and Jack will get along very well."

They grinned at her. "Want to resume negotiations?

"Who's turn is it?" Antonio blurted.

Everyone glanced at the boy's outburst and then seemed to remember they were all playing a card game.

"Um..." Max pondered. "I believe it's yours sweetie."

Antonio nodded. "Good." He picked up the only card from the discard pile and then laid down a king, queen, and jack of hearts along with the five of each suit. He placed a seven of clubs back to the discard pile. "Out." He announced.

The rest of the table was flabbergasted.

"Who shuffled these?" Tara demanded.

"Jack did." Max recalled.

"Well...looks like Antonio wins this round." Hector pulled out the sheet of paper they were recording their scores on. He crossed out Jack's name and added fifty points under Antonio's. "Alright tally your losses and tell me when I call your name."

"And this time I'll shuffle." He grumbled.

---

Lissa pulled out the last dish from the oven with her padded hands. She turned in place and closed the door with her tail. "Coming out with the last one." She announced.

"Take it to the far end." Her father called back.

"On my way." She replied and slithered out of the kitchen. She made her way to the opposite end of the dining table and placed the dish on a round yarn placement mat. "Anything else papa?"

Her father evaluated the table from his position on the other side. "Yes it looks like we're ready." He faced her directly. "Tell your sisters to gather everyone and tell them dinner's ready."

She nodded and smiled. "Will do papa." She complied and slithered back to the kitchen. She placed the oven mitts back to the proper drawer and then exited out to the garage. She paused a moment to listen and taste the air.

"Out front." She told herself and slithered through the open garage door. Her sisters were still playing with the neighborhood children. "Tomorrow I get to play." She promised herself.

The echidna child climbed the concrete wall and approached the chairs where her mama and Mrs. Tam were watching.

"Mama." She got her parent's attention. "Papa says dinner's ready."

The elder echidna turned her head. "Oh Lissa I didn't see you there." She faced back to the lawn. "Kids time for dinner!"

Mrs. Tam nodded. "Chloe, Calvin time to go home."

The whole throng of dirty, messy, child-soldiers and three adult monsters stopped and gaped at the parents. "Aaaaaawwwww."

"Pick up your toys and don't leave anything out. Help each other find your stuff." She continued.

Bryan French padded up to her. "Um, missus Tam."

She blinked and stood up from her chair. "What is it Bryan?"

He pointed at something behind her. "Can I have my spare gun back?"

She blinked and turned partly. "Oh right." She picked up the toy and handed it back to him. "Thank you Bryan." She winked. "I'll have to get one of my own next time." The boy smiled and nodded. He stuffed the toy in one pocket and then proceeded to join the policing effort to recover more weapons and ammunition.

Sula slipped out her phone and made a quick text. "Okay rest of the household is informed and...oh."

"What is it mama?" Lissa asked.

She furrowed her brow. "Jack's on his way back...without Tetra."

Mrs. Tam blinked. "Did something happen?"

Sula shook her head. "Don't know. He doesn't say."

The other woman frowned. "I hope everything's alright."

The elder lamia nodded. "Me too." She blinked and reviewed her latest texts. "Dawn has responded and so it looks like everyone is ready."

"Should we wait for Jack mama?" Lissa asked.

She shook her head. "Probably not necessary, they all needs showers." She pointed at her other children and the centaur, harpy and mishipeshu trio that joined the nerf war. "You let papa know that we'll be in soon and that others need to clean themselves up first."

She nodded and slithered away. "Can do mama."

---

"I'm ho-ome!"

Jack stepped into the kitchen and took in the scent of several freshly baked and fried dishes. For a moment, just a moment, he felt like he'd walked into his old home.

"We're in here Jack!" Sula called from the dining room.

He quick-walked to the entrance and halted. The whole household, save a certain spider-lady, was arrayed around the table. A dozen pans, pots and over-sized plates held partly consumed meals.

"Welcome home Jack." "Welcome back Jack." "Good to see to back Jack."

He breathed out and nodded. "Good to be back." He acknowledged. "Now where is...?" He scanned the inhabitants of the room and located the monster-girl he was least familiar with. "Ah." He eyed the darker furred liminal with horns and bee-lined to her chair.

"Hello Mishi." He held out his hand. "I'm your host Jack, I'm very sorry I wasn't here to see you in."

He visualized as many scenarios of this moment as he could on his drive back. He did anticipate silence from his new guest...but not complete silence from everyone.

Jack's face took on a degree of blank incomprehension as he glanced over the room. All conversation had stopped. They were either staring at him or at Mishi.

Horror staring sinking in when his new guest turned in her chair and glared at him. She folded her arms, clearing uninterested in joining his handshake.

"I...screwed up something terribly didn't I?" His hand withdrew, palm out near his chest.

No response. From anyone. Horror, guilt and shame started pounding on his heart.

Oh gods what did I DO? Is this some liminal thing I completely missed? Or something specific to mishipeshus? I am interrupting dinner so maybe that has something to do with it?

Mishi's glare intensified. One claw began tapping on her arm. Her mouth formed a line. He recognized the countenance of a woman who expected something from him.

"I...I, I'm sorry." He stammered. "I-I don't know what I..?" He swallowed and dipped his head. "Mishi if I've offended-" Her jaw clenched and her dark eyes sparked with anger.

Sula stood up from her chair. "Jack stop it!" She demanded.

He blinked and stared back. "What, I?"

One by one each of his guests set down their utensils, stood from their chairs and glared at him.

Jack backed to the wall, both arms upheld. "I don't know what's going on? Please..." He faced back to the furious cat-lady. "Please I..."

Her expression didn't change.

A recent memory of a similar situation slammed into his mind. Surrounded by monsters, pissed off dangerous one right in front of him.

Worth a shot.

He knelt and bowed his head to her. "I beg your forgiveness."

At first nothing happened. Then he clearly heard Syleris choke back...something.

Glancing back up revealed that the harpy was holding both wings to her mouth. Behind her Maria had looked away and was failing to hide a grin.

The mishipeshu's expression started to crack.

Jack's jaw started to lower. "No..."

Her glare faltered and a smile threatened to expose her amusement at his expense.

Indignation and anger reignited in his soul as the facade fell away. He stood up and observed the rest of the rooms inhabitants failing to maintain their disdain.

You fuckers. You stupid childish pieces of-

His breath picked up, teeth clenched and he throttled all the inappropriate words he wanted to lash at them with. Instead he turned on his heel and marched back to the kitchen.

I'll kill them, I'll kill them, I'll kill them.

The younger lamias started howling shortly followed by the rest of them. Jack's ears burned but he didn't respond further. He ignored it all and strode through the door.

"Wait Jack!" Someone called after him. He didn't bother to spare the mental effort to identify the voice. Indignation, fury, and frustration had overruled almost all functions.

His feet trotted speedily down the steps and carried him back to the van. He reached out for the handle...

A brown blur swept by his vision and suddenly Syleris was standing in his way. "Don't leave Jack."

His first reaction was to plow right over her slight frame and hop in. But a memory of being held down in his bed by her surprisingly powerful arms suggested that tactic wouldn't work. He pivoted and walked toward the back doors of the van.

Verandys cut him off with a gallop and stood in his way. "Where are you going Jack?"

He balled both fists and briefly attempted to move her with rage-fueled telekinesis. "I'm going back to Tetra's family." He spat acidly and changed direction again.

Jack pulled out the key-fob to his Prius, but the youngest echidnas had already encircled it, cutting off his escape.

His eyes clenched shut and he stood in place. "I came back here to greet my new guest. To be a responsible host. I DID NOT drive two towns over to be disrespected and messed with. I will not stand here and take this anymore!"

A pair of clawed feet scrapped the concrete near him. "And you won't." A new voice declared. "I beg your forgiveness."

Jack snapped his eyes open. Mishi was kneeling before him and facing the floor. In fact, all of them were. All his guests were bowing before him.

The keys dropped from his hand.

"I..." He blinked. The emotional turn around was giving him mental whiplash. He couldn't process what he was seeing.

"I..." He stepped toward the horned woman's head. "I...is this what that was like?" He whispered to himself.

Jil'Tanith probably wanted to kill me...for the disrespect I showed when I met her...

He breathed out. The frustration and rage had balanced with their contrition. He wasn't feeling anything strongly at the moment. He blinked and forced a tear back.

A moment went by. And then another. His anger had nothing to act on and eventually washed out. Fugue numbness overtook his head and limbs.

This is...a little much...

His eyes settled on the monster before him. "...alright. Accepted...and given."

She smiled and stood up. "Thank you host." The rest of his household also thanked him.

Jack took another long breath and shook his head. "Mishi..." He held up a finger. "You've got a lot to-"

Her expression blanked. "Please don't call me that."

"Eh, wha?"

Sula slithered forward from the steps. "That's not her name Jack."

He blinked once. "Of course it is. Mishi the mishipesh-" He shut his eyes and his mouth froze a moment. "Why did I not realize how ridiculous that sounded until just right now?" A fist clenched as an older frustration resurfaced. "Godzdammit Smythe."

"To be fair to agent Smythe." Not-Mishi folded her arms. "He was not the official that insisted on that nickname."

Jack opened his eyes again. "Who was it? I'll kill them."

Sula suppressed a chortle as not-Mishi regarded him with some alarm. "I'm not sure murder is a necessary response for this."

He folded his arms. "No it is. Name please."

The mishipeshu faced him and didn't miss a beat. "My name is Atabey Gendewytha."

Jack's expression drained. "That..that's beautiful." He gazed at her a moment, taking her form in. The lustrous fur and her partly scaled tail. The cat-like ears and opposable black clawed digits. The slit pupiled eyes and white tipped horns. "Atabey..." He started nodding lightly and lowered his hands. "I like it." There might have been a redness in her gray cheeks

He sighed and looked over at Sula. "So... is there a plate for me?

"There's plenty of food Jack." Joseph informed. "Come on back in and I 'll serve you some."

Jack closed his eyes. "Thank you." He dipped his head. "Seriously you all, thank you. You can all stop doing that."

They all stood back up. Syleris strode forward a pace. "You deserve it Jack." She waved toward her roommates. "We all thought you deserved this."

Jack's eyes darted around. "I don't..."

She jerked her chin at Dawn. "She overheard us planning a prank for you. And she convinced us to do something more meaningful for you instead."

His eyes narrowed. "You still played a big trick on me."

She nodded. "And that will be the last one like that, I promise."

"As much as we like to mess with you Jack," Sula approached. "We also want you to know that we love and respect you."

Verandys trotted closer. "And we are grateful that you've kept us all under the same roof. You've put up with our antics and not sent us back to the Exchange."

"Yeah! Mama says you're the best." Maria exclaimed.

"You already know my opinion of your efforts." Joseph drawled.

Atabey held out a hand. "And I'm looking forward to getting to know you better."

Jack took in the verbal affection and let out a long breath. "Well, I suppose I'll have go out on a date with you too then."

A few minutes and a plate of spiced grilled chicken with caramel apple slices later...

"So, did something happen to Tetra?" Syleris asked from across the table.

Jack shook his head. "No she's fine." He smiled. "She's better than fine actually. Her uncle and his family have accepted her as one of their own."

"Oh that is so good to hear." Sula commented. "I've read that some human families disowned members after they learned that they had any sort of relations with extra-species."

His expression sobered. "Yeah I read that too, bigots." He chewed a piece of candied fruit. "But the Velasquezes have been very accepting of her. I'm pretty sure we'll see some of them here in the future."

The elder echidna nodded. "I'd like that."

"Do they have any kids?" Priscilla asked.

"In fact they do." He nodded. "Tara and Thomas are teenagers and Antonio is a few years younger, I think he's like ten or something around there."

"That's warm." Lissa stated. "Let us know when they're coming over."

"Yeah about that." He addressed the table. "Did any of you let Smythe know where I was? When he showed up out of nowhere."

"Yep." Sula confirmed with a smirk. "He was speechless."

Jack raised a finger. "Ah right, that pic you posted." He shook his head. "Sorry I should have put two and two together."

"That's alright Jack." She replied. "Also, he wants you to call him."

He rolled his eyes. "Of course he does."

"Is this lack of communication with your coordinator a common occurrence?" Atabey asked.

"Yep." "Yeah." "Oh Yeah." "Yes." "Very common."

Her brows furrowed. "That is...gratifying and distressing to learn."

"Gratifying?" Maria tilted her head. Her sisters copied her motion.

The mishipeshu nodded. "Gratifying that my assignment date was not the only one unknown to my host."

"Ah." Lissa acknowledged.

"Yeah," Jack mused. "I still feel like I should apologize for not being here..."

Atabey shook her head. "Do not blame yourself host. Despite his title, agent Smythe has a glaring, easily correctable flaw. You've no control over that."

He smiled and nodded. "I... thank you Atabey. And please call me Jack."

"Jack." She tried out his name. "Thank you for coming back here for me, though I must wonder if you...abandoned..?"

He shook his head. "Tetra wanted to stay. I'll pick her back up later and I'll introduce you two."

"When you leave, would you consent to allowing me to accompany you?" She asked.

He saluted her with his fork. "Yeah we can do that."

Sometime after dinner...

"So you got everything in?"

"Yes ho- I mean Jack." Atabey answered after he gave her a third tour of the house. It didn't really add anything to her knowledge of the place but he insisted on carrying out his 'hostly' duty.

"Awesome." He nodded. "So I talked with Smythe and Tetra and I'm not going to pick her up until tomorrow afternoon. Would you like me to take you anywhere in the morning beforehand?"

She placed a claw on her chin. "I...if it's possible, I'd like to see some human art."

He cocked his head. "Art? Like paintings?"

She nodded affirmatively.

"Hmm alright." He brought up a browser on his phone. "Well I know there's some big galleries in Chicago but unfortunately that's in the opposite direction-ah here we go." He flipped the display around for her to see. "Forgot there was stuff in town that we can check out."

She studied the image and scrolled through it a bit. "Yes." She smiled. "I'd like to go there."

"Done." He replied and turned the phone back. "I'll purchase some tickets and we'll be ready."

She smirked at him. "It's a date."

A/N: Happy Thanksgiving to my American readers and Happy Holidays to everyone else!

Hopefully clarifying (retconning) Atabey's name from Mishi didn't disappoint anyone. At least too badly.

As absurdly comical the naming conventions of the original material went...I just couldn't continue it with my OCs.

At any rate, hopefully you all enjoyed Atabey's real introduction. Jack'll get into her personality in a bit more detail next chapter.

Oh and Tetra completed her personal quest, so she unlocks a new ability and levels up! jk. But seriously, this felt absolutely fantastic to write for her.

And...I am humbled and grateful to you readers. I...sometimes forget that...this story is as, at least in part, yours as it is mine. Without the reviews and feedback and encouragement I would not have taken it nearly this far.

Almost seven years...I can scarcely believe it.

Here's to seven more. And hopefully a more frequent posting pace.

Cheers!