One evening in the Mushroom Kingdom, everyone's least favorite Garo known as Bob Bobowski decided he was going to raid Mario's house for some spaghetti. The first reason for doing so was that he was hungry.
And second, he was being a jerkass as usual, because some things in the SMG4 universe never changed.
"LOL!" Bob exclaimed out loud, "I cAn'T wAiT tO eAt AlL oF MaRiO's SpAgHeTtI!"
The Garo jumped into the Warp Pipe sitting in the green fields of the Mushroom Kingdom, and it took him right to the residence of the Mario Brothers. Bob chuckled in a sneaky manner, then he tested the door to see if it was locked. To Bob's fortune, the door wasn't locked, likely because Mario was so dimwitted to think that nobody was going to steal his spaghetti this late at night.
Bob opened the door and crept his way towards the fridge, even as he heard snoring from the other room. The Garo rubbed his bladed hands together, then he opened the fridge and acquired three plates of spaghetti.
Time for an evening feast! Bob began eating the spaghetti off the plates, munching away at all of the meatballs and noodles in front of him. He ate every last ounce until the plates were empty, then Bob threw them out and let out a loud belch. The ex-rapper was beyond famished, having enjoyed his meal. But just before he could leave, he heard someone humming the overworld theme.
Enter the Mushroom Kingdom's resident idiot hero, Mario, who was smiling with glee. He'd woken up from his sleep and Bob could hear the fat Italian's stomach growl. Mario entered the kitchen and stopped when he saw the fridge was open. Then, he spotted Bob right near the door.
"DoN't MiNd Me, I wAs JuSt LeAvInG." Bob said to Mario.
Mario looked back at the fridge and his eyes widened, he let out a shriek and looked over at the three plates that had spaghetti sauce stains on them. The fat Italian turned to Bob, eyes wide with fury.
Bob dashed out the door as fast as he could. However, he barely made it down the front porch when an angry Mario tackled him and pinned the Garo to the ground. Bob's yellow eyes were wide as he stared into the face of a furious Italian.
"Eating my spaghetti is not okie-dokie!" Mario told Bob, "And those were the last plates before Mario headed out to get more food."
"DoN't HuRt Me! DoN't HuRt Me!" Bob pleaded.
Mario stood to his full height and kicked the foul-mouthed hobo between the legs, causing Bob to wail with pain. Mario laughed, then he pulled out a bat and advanced on the Garo with a gleeful grin, "Mario's going to do something very illegal!"
"MaRiO, sToP!" Bob wailed, "I'lL dO aNyThINg! I'm SoRrY fOr EaTiNg YoUr SpAgHeTtI!"
The dim-witted plumber put down the bat. "You mean it, Bob?" He asked.
"YeAh, I gUeSs ThAt WaS kInDa DuMb AnD sElfIsH..."
"OooH, Bob admits he was selfish?"
Bob shot to his feet. "BrO, pLeAsE lEt It Go, I aM sOrRy. It WaS jUsT a PrAnK aNd I'lL mAkE uP fOr It."
"Okie-dokie." Mario smirked at the Garo, "Since you ate Mario's spaghetti, you have to go to 7-11 to buy me more."
"WhAt?! ThIs LaTe At NiGhT? ArEn'T tHeY cLoSeD oR sOmE sH*T?!"
"Buy me spaghetti at 7-11 or Mario will do something very illegal… LIKE CUTTING OFF YOUR OVAL EGGS!" Mario declared menacingly.
In a panic, Bob gave in and agreed to the dim-witted hero's demands. He jumped down the Warp Pipe, heading right to Mushroom City. Before the Garo left, Mario told him to buy up to ten plates of spaghetti and once again threatened to hurt him if he returned empty handed. Bob was on thin ice, he could not fail his task.
The Garo never felt more humiliated in his life. In all the years he'd known that idiot since the day they met in the sewer, he never even thought that he would be doing Mario's groceries. But then again, Bob had gone shopping before, so how bad could it be?
Bob walked through the streets of the city, passing a couple Toads and Goombas along the way. Mushroom City was slightly busy at this hour with a handful of cars driving along as people got off work. If 7-11 was open at night, it would be right now with likely many more minutes left until it closed, meaning Bob would be the last customer of the evening.
He walked through the industrial sector of the city and made his way down the east road, walking past a few Mushroom trees until he saw the store ahead. Luckily for Bob, the lights were on, indicating it was open.
Heck, if it came down to it, Bob could easily steal the spaghetti and get back to Mario's place before the cops showed up. Then again, the Garo did not want to deal with Hal Monitor tonight.
Bob walked through the mostly empty parking lot, seeing a car resting close by. He walked over the parking bar and the door rolled open as he came closer, allowing Bob to walk inside. A gray-ish Inkling waited at the nearby counter. If Bob were to guess, the Inkling was a volunteer.
"Yo, Do YoU hAvE sPaGhEtTi?" Bob asked.
"We sure do." The Inkling replied, "By the way, you're that Bob guy, aren't you?"
"I sUrE aM, SpLaToOn SeRvEr." The Garo nodded.
"Man, I knew I'd seen your face somewhere before. You might wanna make it quick with your shopping. If the manager sees you, you're in big trouble, and he does not like you one bit. You really ticked him off once."
The Inkling gestured to a glass shelf where a pile of plates full of spaghetti sat. Bob's eyes lit up, knowing he wouldn't upset Mario. He walked towards the shelf and picked up the spaghetti plates, then he headed to the counter to make his pay. Bob pulled out his wallet and gave the Inkling ten Bob dollar bills, which really surprised the squid boy.
Just then, before the Inkling could say something, a door opened and a one-eyed Pokemon with a floppy hat and magnets for hands made his appearance. The Pokemon spotted Bob and his eye widened with rage.
"YOU!" Viger yelled.
"ViGeR?!" Bob exclaimed, "I tHoUgHt YoU rAn A hArDwArE sToRe, BrO!"
"Well, looks like I'm a manager at 7-11 too." Viger sneered, "AND YOU GOT A LOT OF NERVE COMING AROUND HERE, BOB! GET YOUR STINKING ASS OUT OF HERE! MAYBE I SHOULD TELL THE OTHER SHOP MANAGERS OF EVERY 7-11, HARDWARE STORE OR PAWN SHOP TO BAN YOU!"
"DuDe, YoU aRe OnE dAmN sTiNgY pIeCe oF sHiT!" Bob told Viger.
WHAM! Viger flew at Bob and smacked him so hard, the Garo flew out the doors of 7-11. Viger hovered over and yelled, "AND STAY OUT!"
Luckily for Bob, the spaghetti he'd bought didn't get ruined, neither did Viger interfere with his purchase. Bob stood up and walked away, but not before he heard Viger yell, "SHOW UP IN MY SHOPS AGAIN AND I WILL CALL THE POLICE, YOU F***ING GARO! WE'LL SEE HOW YOU HANDLE HAL MONITOR! STAY AWAY FROM MY STORES!"
'Jerkass.' Bob thought.
As he strolled through the countryside near the city, heading towards the Warp Pipe with Mario's house on his mind, Bob thought about how lucky he was that the chances of Mario doing something illegal to him were low. Man, just wait until he heard about what happened at 7-11.
The End