A/N: I originally wrote this in 2018... Life was very different back then, and I only ever wrote Remus Lupin character analysis, I fear... LOL. I love this lil guy so much. He needs a hug
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Sirius doesn't think much of it, at first. They're only 11 years old when they meet for the first time, and, while he always has a hundred question to ask at a given time, this particular mystery hasn't piqued his curiosity enough for him to try and solve it.
Sirius and James are in their dorm room, having picked the bed that are the closest to each other, unloading their trunks. Sirius is already trying to hatch up a plan to plant a dungbomb Lucius Malfoy in order to humiliate him in front of his cousin Narcissa, when they hear a soft knock on the door.
Before them stands an all too scrawny, pale boy who looks like he hasn't had a restful night of sleep in days, the dark circles under his eyes juxtaposing the white scars littering his face. He doesn't say anything, quietly walking up to the bed closest to the window, his battered trunk trailing behind him. He seems light as a feather, the weight of the world bearing down his shoulders.
At first sight, Remus is a shy, and introverted, and one may wonder if he's ever done so much as speak to another being, while Sirius looks like an overeager, curious child, the perpetual twinkle in his eye giving away his tendency for mischief. The two are paired up in Charms class, and, though Sirius doesn't admit it, he is quite impressed by Remus' ability to levitate his feather on the first try.
The two sound like polar opposites, like they shouldn't be able to stand the other's presence, but, somehow, the contrary happen, and they manage to make a friendship work. Remus starts getting close to James and Peter too, and before they can even notice, they've basically become indivisible.
No, Sirius doesn't bother asking why his new friend always seems to be carrying a piece of chocolate with him, why he only drinks hot chocolate at breakfast, or why he's always so eager to accept a piece of chocolate whenever someone offers him one, because, to Sirius, who himself enjoys a treat made of chocolate every once in a while, chocolate is perfectly normal thing to enjoy, especially for children like them.
Something Sirius doesn't question either at first is the fact that, at the end of each month, Remus leaves the school, originally under the pretext that his mother is sick, but, as times passes by, Remus' excuses grow weaker, causing Sirius' own suspicions to arise. They've been friends for almost a year now, and though Remus has always been a very private person, Sirius feels they're close enough that Remus can tell him anything.
Sirius starts growing restless, after a while. He doesn't know whether he should feel suspicious or worried for his friend, and decides to do something.
But of course, that has nothing to with Remus' obsession with chocolate, Sirius thinks. Once again, if there is anything remotely ordinary about Remus, it's his love for chocolate.
So, he decides to share his worries with James and Peter, who reveal they've both had their suspicions about Remus too.
So they do the best thing, and decide to question their Transfiguration teacher, McGonagall. As the head of the Gryffindor house, she ought to know everything about her students' whereabouts more than else.
Of course, she doesn't say anything, but Sirius notices the way her brows furrow for a second, as if she feels started for a second, before regaining her composure.
"What Mr. Lupin is not any of your business, Mrs. Black," she says, her lips pressing into a thin line, narrowing her eyes at him. If Sirius wasn't convinced that Remus is hiding something before, he definitely is.
So, the next time Remus goes away, they to lead an investigation to try and find clues, all of this without Remus' consent, of course. It sounds easy, considering the fact that Sirius, James, Peter and Remus are roommates, and their first plan solely consists of looking through Remus' things while he's gone. After all, there may be something in there, a clue, anything that might help them in any way, the boys think, but doing this turns out to be very inconclusive. Remus comes back a few days later, and they're still no closer to figuring out whatever is going on with Sirius than they when he left. Instead of gaining information on their friend's whereabouts, they've instead acquired a certain type of restlessness that will clearly not go away until they solve that mystery.
Alas, digging for clues with Remus nearby sounds too dangerous to Sirius, and he fears Remus might start doubting them. After all, if Remus starts growing suspicious of them, he'll be even less inclined to trust them, and they might never find out at all.
After a few months of pointless searchingand of empty clues, Sirius, James and Peter come to the conclusion that Remus is a werewolf. Remus has always been a great liar, yes, able to plow his way out of trouble in the smoothest of ways, but there is only so much he can hide from his friends. One night, after sneaking off to Hogsmeade, they end up being cornered by death eaters and Remus uses wandless magic to fend them off.
After that, Sirius, Peter and James decides to confront him. It isn't easy, as Remus has turned out to be an amazing liar. He denies at first, but the evidence has been piling up, and when Sirius' eyes meet Remus, he finally cracks. The two have always had a connection, one they've never discussed with their other friends but that has always been there. Sirius' eyes are pleading, and Remus decides it's not worth lying about. Sirius knows Remus is afraid of losing his friends, so he takes him aside and reassures him that they will always be there for him, no matter what. This is enough to calm Remus down, who explains to Sirius, James and Peter that he was bit by Fenrir Greyback as a child.
When they start their fifth year, a certain animosity longers between Remus and Sirius. The two have always been very close, but this is different- everyone notices. Sirius has never really questionned his sexuality before: he's never been into girls, but everyone always told him it would come wit time- but when he sees James pining after Lily Evans and Peter after a Hufflepuff girl he's just met, he realises there might be more to it than him being a late bloomer. Girls like him, but he's never liked them back- even Remus had a girlfriend during second year, and although the two had only lasted a few weeks- with Remus breaking up with her as soon as he noticed how uneasy the relationship had made Sirius at the time.
Lily Evans is the first one to say it out loud. She eyes the two suspiciously during Potions class as Sirius wonders out loud with his Amortencia smells like old books and chocolate – exactly what Remus always smells like- and takes Remus aside after class, pretending she needs help with something prefect-related. Sirius knows better, and decides to follow them, only to hear Lily broiling Remus about his love life. Remus stutters and splutters, explaining that there is absolutely nothing going on between him and Sirius, causing his heart to sink into his stomach- is that really what Remus thinks? He wonders, but then hears Remus says he wishes there was something, and that he simply doesn't know how to broach the subject. He feels his heart soar as he hears Remus say he should tell him- and decides he's going to talk to him that night.
So, Sirius takes Remus on a walk near the great lake and sits him down. He talks about his feelings the best he can- after all, his parents have never taught him or Regulus how to express their emotions healthily- and at first he thinks he might put his foot in his mouth but the way Remus looks at him- hopeful and full of love- is enough to fuel him. Remus kisses him before he can even finish his sentence, and Sirius has to physically keep himself from giggling in front of Peter and James when the two get back to their dorm.
They end up telling their best friends after a few months- they somehow manage to keep their relationship a secret to everyone but Lily, who seems oddly insightful- they've almost been caught snogging on Remus' bed a few times by Remus and Peter who don't seem to understand what is happening. They're happy for them, although feeling quite stupid for missing all the clues and not seeing what was right there before their eyes.
The two aren't supposed to work out, at least on paper- a member of the Most Ancient and Noble house of Black and a half-blood werewolf don't seem to have a lot in common, but they somehow make it work. They don't go public, at least not yet- they decide what's goes on between theirs is theirs, and no one needs to know what is going on between them. They have each other, and that's all that matters for now.