I'm getting swamped by reviews at the moments, so it will take some time for everyone's requests to be written. Don't worry; I'll get to them all eventually.
Requested by: Midnight49
Current Client: Diarmuid Ua Duibhne
Irisviel: And here comes another cute muscular guy in a skintight suit... I hope I'm not blushing.
Diarmuid: I want a second chance at life.
Irisviel: That's what being a Servant is about, sir.
Diarmuid: Then I mean I want a second chance at being a Servant. All I wanted was to faithfully serve my Master, fight glorious battles, and die honorably. But I was denied all that. It is not the place of a knight to resent his lord, but my trust and honor has been broken.
Irisviel: This is the saddest thing I've heard all day... and believe me, I've heard some pretty sad things in the past few hours. Now, I believe only the Holy Grail has the power to...
Diarmuid: Is something the matter? You stopped all of a sudden.
Irisviel: Wait a minute... if you were killed in the Holy Grail War, how are you here now?
Diarmuid: Seriously?
Irisviel: Hmm?
Diarmuid: You've had clients from alternate timelines, from the future, from the past, from alternate universes with completely unexplained phenomena, with the fabric of time and space all but obliterated, and straight from the grave, of all places, and you're wondering how I'm alive right now?
Irisviel: Um.
Diarmuid: Forgive me. I did not mean to shout.
Irisviel: No, no, it's fine. Er, look, how about I set you up with Kayneth and you can talk it all out. Sound good?
Diarmuid: I – guess.
Irisviel: Yay! You know, I think Kiritsugu had better be there too. He's my hubby, but I really must object to his part in your little drama.
Diarmuid: Drama?
Irisviel: Now then... have you ever considered wearing concealer?