Chapter 2 – Who and Why

Neo and Ozpin get to know one another a little better, set up some ground rules, and share a few snacks.

Neo still didn't believe it, even as the so-called headmaster explained the situation. He was still speaking in her own never-before-used voice, but she couldn't be paying less attention. This had to be some manner of trick, some devious semblance being aimed in her direction.

Control of the body and mind were too powerful for any semblance, but perhaps this was just the skillful manipulation of a weaker semblance. If Professor WitchBitch of Beacon –

"I'll thank you to refer to my deputy in less profane terms."

If Lady Glynshit Whore-Slutwitch of Clan Fuckhole McFuck could use telekinesis to move objects, perhaps someone else could move Neo's lips from afar, and she was only thinking that the person was controlling her. In fact, this could be the work of many. Yes, that made the most sense – Fox spoke to her, Professor Fuckface McBitchass was flapping her lips, and…and…someone else was throwing the voice. It didn't even need to be a semblance; if Coco Adel had studied ventriloquism, she could be doing this.

"Yes, that makes perfect sense," said Not Neo. "The entire institution of Beacon had banded together not to arrest you but to gaslight you into believing you are possessed by the spirit of a dead headmaster. You, the minion of the minion of the minion of the mastermind of this plan."

…that wasn't the right number of minions. Neo had answered directly to Cinder, but assuming Not Neo was referring to her loyalty to Roman, there should only have been two degrees of separation from her to mastermind, not three.

"That is a…"

Neo wrestled control of her own face back. She wasn't sure of how she did it, but it came intuitively, as easy as taking a step or raising a middle finger.

…most pleasant revelation, to know that you were not even aware of the Queen's influence. Had you been privy to her abilities and followed through with the attack on Beacon regardless, I may not have been so forgiving.

This was good information she was getting from this voice. It could control her, but it only had because she'd involuntarily let it when it offered to show her 'proof.' As long as she kept a hand on the reins, it wasn't going to control her into jumping off a cliff or cutting off her trigger fingers or something.

I'd appreciate it if you didn't ignore me. I will gladly tell you who I am and why I am here, but I'd rather have your full attention. This is a complicated description, one which I'd fain not repeat twice.

That was probably one of the voice's better tries to stall her. Neo was still on the docks, standing around a scene of carnage and death following her clash with the White Fang. She still needed to escape to the mainland, and no voice speaking directly to her brain would distract her.

The nearest ship was the one she chose. Taking a step over the rim, she reviewed her vessel. It was a simple fishing boat, with little more than a floor, a sail, and a rudder, but it would serve its purpose. Sinking the other boats would take too long, so she –

I can bring you Cinder's head.

That gave Neo pause. Cinder was the one who was responsible for Roman's death, and if…

Oh, that was close. She nearly let the voice get to her.

Cinder Fall was looking for the power of the Fall maiden, which she now possesses. This power gave her control of the elements and weather, enabling her to fight on a different level than the average huntress. It was a power that transferred upon death, a power she believed she earned but had stolen away from her, a power that mattered to her more than anything in Beacon. I'm not sure what she told you, but I'd be willing to bet at least some of those phrases were uttered by Miss Fall.

The voice was correct; Cinder had bitched and moaned to no end about having a power she 'deserved' ripped away from her at the last moment. Stepping off the fishing boat, Neo gestured for the voice to continue.

Before that, I must ask…why do you not address me? Your throat, which I previously thought damaged, operates without error. You do not speak verbally, but I can when I control your body, suggesting that you could as well, at least physically. Even in your mind, I can hear your brain forming ideas and conceiving of concepts, but you have no train of thought, no internal narrative monologue. Is this a conscious choice, a physical disability, or a mental block of some sort?

Neo had nothing to say.

Very well, then. I am Headmaster Ozpin. I was cursed by the Brother Gods for my failure to stop Salem, the Queen of all Grimm. She is the mastermind to whom Cinder answers, and she seeks to reproduce her victory at Beacon at all three of the remaining academies.

The voice really needed to get to the point – specifically, the point of Hush's metal tip piercing Cinder's heart.

I do not know Cinder's full plans, but Haven is indubitably her next target. My curse causes me to reincarnate into a new host upon my death, simultaneously burdening and empowering them with my knowledge and…abilities. With these newfound powers, we can kill Cinder and stop Salem once and for –

There was no need to go on. Cinder had pressed Roman into her service when it was clear as day that she had no regard for him other than as a pawn. She'd thrown him to the Atlesians without a second thought, and he'd never gotten off that battleship when it went down. Cinder Fall needed to die an agonizing death.

I quite agree. Roman was not the only casualty of her ruthless machinations.

A memory came to the forefront of her mind. A brilliant beam of hateful light teeming with energy tore through Ozpin's shield, then through his chest. His lungs were burned instantly, preventing him from getting in any snippy last words to his killer, but –

Neo pressed out her hand.

What are you doing?

She was trying to make a shield like that one in the video. Ozpin, which she'd tentatively accepted as the identity of the voice (even though she doubted the whole reincarnation because of the gods bit), had referenced Neo getting 'abilities,' and it didn't take a genius to figure out what that meant when he immediately showed her himself using supernatural powers.

It was a vision, not a video, and I was showing you the vision to establish trust, not to…s-stop that. Hey!

No shield came up. Neo tried everything – snapping, making a fist, imagining a shield around her body, using the power of enemyship (she liked that one better than the power of friendship) – but the magic wasn't feeling helpful today.

Now would be a really good time for some of that knowledge Ozpin had mentioned to simultaneously burden and empower Neo.

The use of magic will merge the fusion of our –

Neo didn't care. If this power stole her life or sent her to the flaming rings of the afterlife's fiery pit, it would be a price worth paying. Roman had been Neo's everything – her hope, her dreams, her family, her best friend in the whole wide world – and Cinder took that away.

Neo would make her pay, whatever the cost.

Perhaps we should not begin the assault on Salem's forces the very day we are bonded? It might be to both of our benefits – and by that, I mean the benefit of our shared goal of stopping Cinder – that we familiarize ourselves with one another and what we are capable of before we go running off half-cocked. Does that sound reasonable?

It did.

So, Neo's past life had stuck his dick in a Grimm. Her respect for Ozpin went both up and down at that knowledge – up because that was hardcore as fuck, something Neo could always respect, and down because this idiot had actually believed 'the magic of love' would purify his wife's taint.

As a matter of fact, I simply chose to believe that her beauty was more than just superficial and chose to ignore the corruption that the Pools of Darkness –

His thirsty ass had literally raised and subsequently brought down Remnant's first kingdom. Neo cringed. No matter how hard Ozpin pleaded, she would not ever for any reason have sex with a Grimm.

I wasn't going to –

Scratch that – she wouldn't have sex with anyone for him. The only fucking she intended to do was fucking Cinder up.

Quite. Now that we've got my history out of the way, perhaps you'd like to share with me your own?

That wasn't how it worked. He might have been an open book, but Neo wasn't going to simply tell her entire life story to the first voice…okay, to the third voice she'd ever heard in her head. But those pills had completely made the first two go away, honest.

It is not because I wish to invade your privacy. I simply wonder, why you?

From what Neo understood of Ozpin's description, it was always random. She'd probably just drawn a short stick in the spirit lottery.

True, the choice of my host is not predictable in any way. However, every one I've ever shared a body with, all the way back to the first, had been both biologically male and identified as a man. You are the first woman to…no, I am not going to 'perv you out.' Miss Neo, there must be some reason for this change.

There might not have been.

The God of Light himself placed the burden of combatting Salem on my shoulders. If you were chosen, and now of all times when Salem is the closest to victory in generations, that must make you the most important incarnation I've ever had. The Brother Gods themselves have bent their own rules to unite us.

Neo still wasn't clear on that whole thing. Ozpin had shared his memories after a certain point – him being resurrected and sent by the Gods with some 'divine assignment' to stop Salem – but nothing before that. She only knew it was about the Brother Gods because she recognized the dude in the vision from a painting in a storybook her mother had once read to her before Neo killed her. Plus, there were gaps in the memories she had seen, particularly when the topics of his and Salem's immortality, the Brothers Gods, and the relics came up.

Well, as your moral compass occasionally does not point north…

Neo's eyes narrowed.

…as your moral compass spins in circles like a drunken merry-go-round with blood-soaked Nuckelavees for ponies…

That was more like it.

…I think it would only be common sense to withhold some of our…of my greater weaknesses. After all, you did work for Salem indirectly. I cannot discount the possibility of your running back to her employ.

That actually made the voice's score go up in her head. If it was just some idiot who blindly trusted any pretty face, she wouldn't really pay it much heed. The fact that it played things close to the chest only made it more trustworthy.

That fact that I am hiding things from you makes me MORE trustworthy in your eyes?

Neo nodded. And, technically, she supposed that it would be in 'their eyes,' now that they shared a body.

Before they could go anywhere, though, they needed to set up some ground rules. Nothing too complicated, just some basic agreements to make sure their shared mental brainspace didn't become some of warzone.

The first rule was obvious: no touching Neo's body parts.

Simple enough. I concur.

If Ozpin thought that these rules required his agreement before being ratified, he had another thing coming.

Anyways, the second rule would be that Ozpin didn't get to touch Neo's body parts.

I already agreed. You already said that.

It was such an important rule that it bore repeating. Like, what if Neo woke up and Ozpin was using her hands to fondle her breasts? He was literally a creepy old pervert who had never been inside a woman before, and Neo refused to let her body be used to slake his lust.

I vow on my honor as a headmaster that I shan't abuse your trust. You have my word.

The third rule was that Ozpin closed whatever brain eyes he had whenever she was getting changed or using the potty.

The fourth rule was that he didn't put any restrictions on how much ice cream she could eat.

I'm not sure why you think I would even desire to limit that. The calories may be a tad unhealthy, but you have the lithe figure of a huntress, so I don't doubt you properly care for your figure.

Neo nodded, smiling. She most certainly did.

The fifth rule was that he didn't put any restrictions on how many lives she could end.

I'm going to have to disagree with you on that one. The only reason I have not forced subsumption and ended your left by my own hand is because you never directly harmed any of my students. I would like to see you face justice for your crimes, including those perpetrated on this very island, but it is rare to find myself in a host already possessing such an excellent combat sense, and I cannot throw such an opportunity away.

If Ozpin didn't stop saying stuff like that, Neo might just blush.

How about this – Salem's minions are fair game for you…tendencies. You may mutilate, dismember, and otherwise murder them however you see fit, but no innocents.

Neo could accept that. The only times she'd killed was in self-defense, when there was a very clear need for it, when Cinder had threatened her and Roman, or when she felt like it. And before he asked, she thought that the mouse Faunus back in the village was a huntress trying to choke her. That was an accident, one which Neo would have avoided had she not been distracted by a certain disembodied spirit's voice.

Her blood is not on my…urgh. Very well. Are we agreed that death shall be limited to those deserving who we would BOTH condemn?

That was fine by Neo. The sixth rule was that she was not going to be a teacher under any circumstances.

The seventh rule was that Ozpin was not allowed to drink or use any debilitating drugs while in her body. Smoking would be fine, but nothing that dulled or slowed her senses.

The eighth rule was that Ozpin would not touch any of Neo's body parts.

Will that be all, Miss Neo?

That would.

If I am to be honest, I'm rather surprised you've accepted this so easily. Most of my other hosts entered long states of denial. Some even committed suicide before I ever took control.

…Neo did nearly burn down Menagerie and flee the country to avoid him.

Yes, but once we were on speaking terms, you accepted my explanation without much disagreement. Were you already a believer in the Faith of the Brother Gods?

Neo wasn't. She still wasn't 100% sure that all that bullshit was real, but Ozpin had shown her those memories in such vivid detail that it was kinda hard to doubt them. Plus, Cinder had set the stage for Neo's unusually high tolerance for weird stuff by talking to Grimm, having a beetle crawl out of her wrist, using magic in front of her, and putting hot sauce on ice cream.

Hot…sauce?

Cinder had practically drowned any food she ate in that swill. Mac and cheese, bagels, apples – everything. Neo was tolerant of all different systems of belief, but even she drew the line at a spicy pepper sundae.

That's what convinced you of magic?

First of all, they lived on a planet with an exploded moon that was floating in the sky where people could mine magic out of the ground and also use magic semblances to do acts of magic. Accepting that there were other things science couldn't explain wasn't some major leap in logic.

Second of all, she was distracting him with the whole hot sauce thing while she'd swiped a wallet. That meant he a) didn't know everything she did at all times, b) couldn't feel her limbs, and c) was very gullible.

Neo was currently walking through the city in the nighttime. A new illusion covered her body, this one making her look like a cat Faunus with a bob tail. Some people might have thought that using the same trick would eventually fail, but no one on Menagerie knew she could shapeshift her appearance, so there was little danger of being found. Thus, Neo would walk about the streets without a care in the world, even though she was probably public enemy #1 for the White Fang.

Why do you even need money?

For pintade(s). Obviously.

Ozpin made her brain feel all weird and short-circuity for a second, which she assumed was the equivalent of him rolling his eyes in dissatisfaction without actively being in control of her eyes.

The shop owner didn't recognize Neo, and she received her second rotisserie bird for the day. This time, without Ozpin to interrupt her by filling her head with intrusive thoughts, she was free to devour the thing whole and pick its bones clean. Just for good measure, she snapped each of the drumsticks before throwing them away.

Menagerie was actually quite beautiful at this time of day. The stars were out, but their natural light was augmented by the numerous candleposts that were still in the process of being manually lit. The flames flickered and danced, making the shadows sway back and forth as though the breeze were pushing them too. If Neo weren't planning on hunting down Cinder using Ozpin's resources, she might have actually thought it worthwhile to wait out the storm and stay here.

Only one thing could make this night even more perfect – five slushies.

Isn't that technically five things?

Ozpin might learn a thing or two if he accessed the neuron in her brain that held the memory of her weapons' name. Besides, why settle for just one ice-drink from the vendor when she could try each and every one of his flavors?

Neo pointed to the cherry-ice dispenser and watched with gluttonous interest as he filled up a paper cup. Then, before he could hand her the drink, she pointed to the lemon-ice. The man offered her a warm smile to complement the frigid beverage and began to fill it up.

Before Neo could point to the mango-ice, she felt something tugging on the right side of her body.

Don't look now, but we are being watched. Four o'clock.

Neo looked.

Well, if she'd doubted Ozpin had never been a woman before, such doubts were allayed. There was a Faunus boy standing around with his friends who was busy eye-fucking Neo. The two of them locked eyes, and Neo flipped him her middle finger. His friends began to shove and tease him, and Neo walked off with her slushies.

That wasn't to say the island was not on high alert. There were at least five plainclothes White Fang members in the immediate vicinity, but none of them were watching Neo at the moment. It wasn't their fault – how could they know she was the person they wanted when her appearance didn't even match the description of the perp? Buckteeth and his friends had chased her down on the docks, meaning that they had somehow recognized her in spite of her changed illusions (prolly Hush, but who could say?), but the four of them were dead, so they couldn't tell anyone now.

I think I see a White Fang spy. No, make that two.

Better late than never. Neo decided that now would be as good a time as any to show off to her new brain friend just how powerful her semblance was. Hugging the five drinks to her body so that she could carry them all at once, she began to walk in the direction of the nearest spy. He saw her coming, but he was either looking for a snake Faunus or a dog-eared Faunus, so his eyes passed right over her the first time. The second time, when she was much closed, he stared at her with confusion for a few seconds until she saw down next to him on his bench to his left.

"Something I can help you with, lady?"

Neo placed the five drinks to her own left, than stroked a finger along his cheek. Her smile grew sultry, making her fake intentions clear.

"S-Sorry, little lady. I'd love to…uh…get to know you better, but I'm rather busy."

Neo raised her eyebrows, as though to ask him if he were sure he wanted to turn down such a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. The guard cursed his luck and shook his head once more. Neo's grin turned into a flirtatious frown, then a haughty pout. Picking up her five drinks, she heard to man curse as she turned away and pronouncedly stepped away from him.

By the Gods. You just walked right up to him…no wonder your semblance made Torchwick such a troublemaker for Beacon.

Neo wanted to defend Roman, to say that he was a force of nature in his own right with or without her, but even Roman would concede that she was the more talented of the two of them. Poor Roman had never unlocked his semblance, but then he'd never exactly needed it.

Well, he might have needed it if it was the ability to teleport from the roof of an Atlesian battleship to safety on the ground.

Neo didn't blame Ozpin for that, even though he was technically on the opposite side of the war. It would've been no more productive than blaming the technician who built the ship. They may have had a hand in the death, but it was completely unintentional. Cinder, on the other hand, had as good as implied she wanted Roman off her hands, and her wish had been granted. She was the one to blame, and she was going to die screaming for it.

Oh, and Little Re–

No. You will not.

A sharp pain coursed through her head, and Neo dropped all five of the drinks and fell to the floor, tearing strands of her hair out in pain as she experienced a band new type of agony. It wasn't physical pain, like having her flesh burned or her bones broken. This was mental pain. Everything she feared, everything she dreaded, and everything that could torment her was pulled straight to the center of her mind, and she was forced to stare at it for what felt like hours on end, even though it was probably only a few seconds.

I shall not allow it.

Neo nodded up and down violently, crying. People had seen her drop like a sack of potatoes, but since she couldn't scream, they had no idea of the pain Ozpin had shoved into her skull. To them and to the White Fang spy, it looked like a tiny girl buying more drinks than she could reasonably carry and dropping them all. They saw a child weeping over spilled ice cream, not a young woman who'd just had a lance of excruciating, weaponized misery pierce her thoughts.

"Oi, lass!" called the slushie Faunus. "Don't worry, I'll get you some new ones, free o' charge."

Neo ceded control in her moment of desperation, as she was unable to stand up of her own free will. Ozpin plastered a childish smile over her face, skipped her to the man, and patiently waited as he filled up the new cups.

"Here you are. No need to pay."

Neo's hands pushed some lien towards him.

"I insist," said Neo's voice. "I'm not so stingy that I'd steal from a good man like you, mister sir."

"Mighty kind of you."

Neo's hand took the five cups, now placed in a Styrofoam holder, and carried them away from the stand. Her little legs carried her a few lanes over to a set of public picnic tables. Her arms set down the drinks in their holder, and Ozpin gave back control to her.

Neo's salty tears fell into the cherry-ice. For the record, she'd never been meaning to kill Little Red, nor had she been considering it. Ozpin had really jumped the gun on torturing her when she hadn't even finished the full thought.

If I did, I am sorry. But know that what you just experienced is a fraction of the pain I can inflict if you truly do harm one of my students. Consider that my first and only rule.

Neo nodded, sipping the slushie as she wept. The sugar helped remind her that there were still good things in life, which was difficult to believe after what Oz did to her. Dust, if a Grimm found her in this state of fear and pain, it would probably die from over-climaxing.

Now, what were you thinking about Miss Rose? Fret not; I shan't jump to conclusions this time.

Neo wasn't convinced.

No matter what you say, I will not harm you. You have my word.

Fine, then. Neo had been thinking that Ruby was in a middle ground in terms of blame. She had knowingly engaged Neo and Roman, but that fight had been going so poorly that it would've taken a miracle for her to have been the one to kill Roman. Neo had been carried away by the strong air currents, but she still had been close enough to see Roman kick red's ass and knock her down. She'd attacked Roman, meaning she was technically an enemy, but she'd lost, meaning that Neo was willing to bury the hatchet if Little Red was. She maybe deserved a punch on the shoulder for it…assuming that she had survived the falling airshipwreck when Roman hadn't. He hadn't been there at their agreed upon meeting spot should things fall to shit, meaning that he was deader than a doornail, and there was no way Little Red had better survival instincts than the boss.

She's alive.

Neo wasn't so sure.

Trust me on this one. Much like you, Ruby is a fighter.

It was midnight when Neo finished her last five slushies. Ozzie had been pushing her to down them all faster, but he clearly didn't understand concepts like brainfreeze as well as she did. She had half a mind to just slurp 'em all down in one go just to see his nerve endings freeze up, but she didn't want to hurt herself just to spite him.

I think we've wasted enough time on dinner.

And ice cream.

And ice cream. The sooner we reach out to Miss Belladonna, the better.

Miss Catgirl? Neo had no idea how she factored into the equation.

I am a headmaster. The students will trust me. If we are to defeat Salem and thus avenge Roman Torchwick, we will need trustworthy followers.

Neo pointed to her own face. Honestly, this was stupid. He talked about wasting time on dinner, but he didn't bring up his idiotic plans to get Neo killed until after she was done eating.

Miss Belladonna won't kill you. I can explain the situation to her. Honestly, the use of your apparently unused voice should be enough to convince her that you are no longer the woman you once were.

The ninth rule was that Ozpin never even so much as asked Neo to use her voice.

I will handle convincing her.

Neo had to repress a silent groan. He shouldn't need to convince her. If Ozpin knew he was going to die and reincarnate, it didn't make a fudge sauce-covered finger's lick of sense that he didn't give them all some code that only he would know.

I gave Qrow a code. You'll need to ask him–

Neo silently reminded Ozpin of the ninth rule, which he'd already broken.

I'll need to ask him for my cane. As for young Blake, I can simply reference a conversation we had in the wake of the docks incident when we were alone. That ought to be enough to convince her.

That wasn't the point, though. The fact that he hadn't preset code words for each and every student when he had the chance was a tactical blunder on his part, especially since his plan sounded like it revolved around these damn kids. From now on, Neo would handle the thinking.

And what, pray tell, shall I do with my brainpower while you're busy doing the thinking?

That was obvious. He could mine bit-coin.

They eventually agreed to a decent division of labor. Neo would scope out Catgirl Manor and get them an audience with Lady Catgirl, and Ozpin would be the one in charge of convincing her to side with them.

Still, Neo wasn't entirely sure this would work. After all, if this young Faunus had run so far away from Beacon that she ended up an entire world away, it was unlikely the ghost of her old teacher who she'd apparently only ever personally met once would sway her. Still, if things went wrong, Neo would be able to use that as proof that they should do things her way and just go after Cinder using Ozpin's magic and be done with this whole thing. The sooner, the better.

I'm telling you – there is no way to split our souls. Please believe me when I say that I've tried. Entire lifetimes were spent seeking a way to liberate unwilling hosts from my equally unwilling spirit, and they bore no fruit. I cannot allow you to waste precious time repeating my mistakes –

He didn't need to get her panties in a twist. Neo wasn't going to even try to split herself with her bodily roommate until Cinder was dead and buried. According to Oz, that meant taking down some Salem lady's other minions, so it wouldn't be a problem. She threw a thumbs up; he could count on her.

Anyways, Neo was currently watching the mansion through a pair of binoculars. She was invisible, or rather disguised to match the wooden wall of a house that was near enough to watch the place from. The security forces wore a uniform that was very similar to the bucktoothed man she'd killed yesterday, and they were actively pushing away the White Fang. Little Miss Catgirl hadn't exited her room for the entire duration of her stay, but Momma Catgirl and Holy Fucking Big Poppa Catgirl-man certainly had.

Neo wondered how the youngest Belladonna was tied to the government of Menagerie.

Her parents founded the White Fang, but Sienna Khan rested control away from them. They now are the leaders of Menagerie. The title is Chieftain, held by her father Ghira Belladonna.

Menagerie didn't have a council, then.

No. It's quite different than the kingdoms. Some describe it as primitive, but I prefer to think of it as…oh my. You seem to have some colorful opinions on Faunus liberation. You…want them to kill all humans? No, you want them to overthrow the humans and rule the –

They needed to stay focused.

Actually, if we are to share a body, it would be best if we could form some sort of rapport. I'm curious about how you think. Perhaps if you were to explain your reasoning on the issue of Faunus enfranchisement, it would aid us in working together in the future.

Rule number nine was not to interrupt Neo when she was casing a joint.

'Casing a joint' as you so colorfully put it implies our goal is to rob this manse of valuables. We simply seek an audience with Miss Belladonna, and perhaps Mr. Wukong. Also, wasn't the ninth rule to not ask you to use your voice?

Neo had no clue; she was mostly just heaping on whatever rules she felt like to the growing pile as she thought of them.

May I briefly have control? It won't be but a second.

Neo begrudgingly handed it over.

Ozpin reached out a wood-colored hand, disguised as the wall of the house, and pointed a single finger back around at Neo.

Then, he poked Neo's left boob.

Motherfucker! Right in the areola! 30% of the rules up to this point were to not touch Neo's parts, and he just went and…oh, that was it. Neo was gonna –

Going to what? Please, do tell.

She would – oh, he so wasn't getting off easy this time. She was really going to let him have it now.

Have what?

She…he…

I think you see the problem. Short of cutting off your nose to spite your brain, you hold no real power over me, nor I you. We cannot hurt each other without inflicting the same pain or damage onto ourselves. Perhaps you could punish me by thinking of some gory murder scene and invoking my more civilized sensibilities –

That was a good idea. Neo recalled in vivid detail her all time most stabby stabs.

– but we shall need to cooperate if this is going to work. And I mean seriously cooperate, not simply agree to the same general goals.

That was true, but he didn't need to violate her body to prove a point.

You needed to understand that this was serious. Perhaps the topic appears trivial now, but when you wish to chase down an enemy and I would prefer you to tend to an injured ally, discord could ruin us. If we can hash out some differences and find common ground now, we may be able to save ourselves much strife at a future date.

Perv.

Still, Neo could see the logic in his argument. While she didn't much care for the topic of Faunus enfranchisement, she knew he was more curious about her sense of ethics, so she would agree to talk, provided he gave her something equal in return.

And what would that be?

Neo would let him know when his turn for show-and-tell came around.

Basically, the way she saw the White Fang was that they were a disappointment, just like Faunus in general. When the dust of the Faunus Rights Revolution settled, they had been in such a position of advantage. They were the victors, and the humans had been negotiating from a position of weakness, and yet they handed away their rights.

So, you disapprove because they are weak? You might have found a kindred spirit in Raven, had you known her.

That was not quite it. She disapproved because they were strong, and they had stopped fighting. The Faunus should never have settled for Menagerie. When Atlas –

Mantle, at the time.

When Mantle offered them a shit deal, the Faunus should have wiped out the human infestation and finished the job.

You do realize that would have led to you never being born.

It was a matter of principle. Faunus all had night vision, and many had animal traits that gave them superior skills – sharp teeth, claws, prehensile tails, poison, enhanced senses. The Faunus were stronger, and yet they'd chosen peace when they would have benefitted from war. Had they been the weaker species and ended up as they were not – stuffed on an island or discriminated against as they were – Neo might have had more sympathy. But they weren't, so she couldn't.

Only a fool or a coward didn't win a fight that they could.

Perhaps I was wrong. You and Raven would not have gotten along well at all, in that case.

Neo believed that skills needed to be used, or they were no good at all. That was why she picked pockets even when she didn't need the money, and why she picked fights even when she didn't need to kill. Roman had taught her how to steal and how to murder, and it would've been a damn shame to not do either of those just because puny things like laws told her not to.

But the White Fang continue to wage war against –

Ozpin had not been privy to the same conversations Neo had. The White Fang was a stiff breeze away from crumbling to pieces. That little token effort on the Faunus' part won them no respect from her.

She didn't blame every Faunus. Some, like Adam, fought the good fight. She liked the way he led his little cells, at least on principle, but he himself was a bit too edgy and stalkerish for her tastes, especially in regards to Ms. Catgirl. Others like Mr. Slushie weren't built for fighting, and she didn't expect them to. But as a whole, the species was a letdown.

And now it was Neo's turn to pose a question.

I shall answer as best I can, then.

Why was Ozpin losing?

Hmmm. Why did Beacon Fall? Is that what you ask?

No, Neo knew that. She'd been a part of it. What she really wanted to know was why Ozpin, having four academies at his beck and call and literally all the time in the world, hadn't led massive armies of huntsmen and huntresses to Madami Salami's door to kill her once and for all.

I…she…

H̶e̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶l̶i̶e̶.̶ ̶ ̶W̶e̶l̶l̶,̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶l̶e̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶b̶l̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶g̶o̶o̶d̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶i̶t̶,̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶f̶u̶t̶u̶r̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶f̶e̶r̶e̶n̶c̶e̶.̶

…her regeneration makes landing the killing blow difficult.

L̶i̶e̶s̶…̶

I've tried in the past and incurred catastrophic losses on my side. Millions of lives were lost. In the end, I decided a strategy of reactive defense was better. Technological advancement marches on, as do human-Faunus relations, so time only serves to increase my…our side's power.

…̶b̶l̶e̶n̶d̶e̶d̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶t̶r̶u̶t̶h̶.̶ ̶ ̶N̶o̶t̶ ̶h̶a̶l̶f̶ ̶b̶a̶d̶.̶

Alas, I seemed to have failed to realize that the time I gave her allowed her to hatch a plan to bring my empire to its knees. It is easier to destroy than it is to preserve, meaning that her task can be accomplished with far fewer resources. All she needed to do was land a critical blow once, and Beacon fell.

She was stupid.

Salem is a worthy –

But she was. If she couldn't be killed by any means Ozpin had tried thus far, then Salem should've thrown herself at him time and time again. Ozpin could be killed and had a fairly long refractory period…

Please, don't call it that.

…so Salem had nothing to lose an everything to gain. If he couldn't kill or contain her, there was no risk on her part if she just walked into Vale and lit up the streets with a million Grimm. Or a bunch of suicide bombs attached to her chest.

Knowledge of her existence could have unified mankind into –

Except who cared? Why would it bother her if mankind was unified? Most everyone was already unified against the Grimm, so knowing they weren't leaderless wouldn't really change all that much.

I…suppose you are correct.

No. He was being obtuse. Neo wasn't just thinking this stuff for fun or to insult his/their ex. Salem must have had eons to fight him, and she consciously chose to hole up in some castle in the middle of nowhere. After all those years, anyone would have realized that immortality meant they had nothing to lose. Fuck, even the boredom must have made her want to leave.

But she didn't. She never personally came out to fight. She sent her Grimm to wage war with humanity, but she if Ozpin's visions were correct, the only limiting factor on the size of her Grimm armies were the time it took to spawn them from her pool of motor oil.

Pool of darkn–

He really needed to stop being such a dickhead and try to follow along. This was getting real.

Salem could have won this war and exterminated humanity if she came out and tried her luck against the four kingdoms. She could have won if she waited for a few centuries and built up enough Grimm to block out the sun.

Why? That was the question they should be asking. The more they understood about Salem's methods, the better off they would be when fighting her minions. If she was holding back, there had to be a…

…a reason…

There had to be a reason. And unless Ozpin were a dummy, he would've thought of all these points just the same. At the very least, he would've welcomed Neo's willingness to try to outthink their enemy, not be all cagey and try to misdirect her. There was a reason, and Oz knew that reason, and he was keeping it from Neo.

Okay. She didn't care about ancient history or religious stories. But if Ozpin had some tactical advantage on Salem, some reason for the détente, Neo needed to know it.

You have to understand that some secrets are too –

So, all that stuff about building a rapport was bullshit, then.

It's not that –

Nope.

You used to –

Nope.

Perhaps we should go –

Nope.

Please, let us be mature about –

Neo tuned him out and turned her attention back upon Catgirl Manor. She was the one in control of her body, going on his quest to fight his enemy. If he wasn't going to share the truth about something as important as their enemy's entire reasoning, she wasn't going to bother conversing with the big baby.

Oh, and she also imagined a nice bouquet of veiny dicks, so now Ozpin was gay.

Bitch.

Omake

Several days ago, up in space

"Yo, bro!" said the God of Darkness, sitting on a god couch. "Wouldn't it be so fucked up if I put that Ocelot guy into the ice cream waifu you like so much? The stabby one?"

"What?" said the God of Light. "Dude, don't. That's–"

"Too late! Boom!"

"C'mon, bro! We were doing a whole thing where he was only a guy. It lasted, like, two or three millennia!"

The God of Darkness chugged another god beer and threw one to the God of Light. "Were we? I could've sworn we'd at least put him with…there was the…but…oh, wow. Crap, I guess you're right. This IS his first chick incarnation. Sorry, man."

The God of Light sighed and shook his head. "Nah, it's fine. Just, like, check with me next time. Hey, pass me that god blunt."

Next Chapter: Catgirl Manor

A wide host of catgirl allies are conscripted to join the fight, many through less than scrupulous means.

Author's Notes

Neo doesn't have an internal monologue or a train of thought. She just thinks directly rather than phrasing her thoughts into first person words. Never will 'I,' 'me,' or 'myself,' refer to Neopolitan in this fanfic.

I apologize for having her be a supremely deductive Mary Sue in terms of figuring out Ozpin's lies, but it does seem like something a trained tactician and liar might look for. Also, she doesn't figure out the secrets, just that they exist and he's keeping them from her.

Pintades are a real bird. I personally don't eat them, but I could if I had a pintade available and ate it.

Slushies are a real slushie. I personally don't slush them, but I could if I had a slushie and slushed it.

Weiss may be bestgirl, but Blake is Catgirl, and all her kin are too. This is now canon.

Also, did you know that ffn net censors the word 'bit-coin' without the apostrophe? It auto-converts it to 'coin' when the file is saved.

Happy rats, and don't do crime!