Episode 31: Sephiroth
If you're looking for a woman that is serious - so stoic that her blank, sometimes expressionless facial expressions remain undeterred, then Lucina's your gal. Aside from her outstanding popularity among the Smash community, which has in turn overshadows her father Chrom's popularity overall, the young princess has become rather infamous for choosing not to reveal her true emotions, and this has greatly overlooked the kindness she shows to others. Why in fact, whenever she shows any positive feelings, it's always a big deal.
"LUCINA LAUGHED!" Bowser Jr. and his Koopaling siblings would alarm everyone whenever Lucina laughed or even giggled, and that honestly doesn't happen that much. Some of the brawlers have never even seen Lucina laugh to begin with, and others have a tough time visualizing the princess performing such an action in their heads.
But today, Lucina has her sights set on changing how her peers view her - a stoic princess who can't seem to take a joke, or sarcasm for that matter - by partaking in...wait for it...stand-up comedy. Yes, you heard that right, Lucina is attempting to do stand-up comedy, and she plans to do this in the mansion's gaming room, on the same stage where K.K. Slider and Jigglypuff hold their musical performances.
"You sure you wanna give this a shot?" Lucario asked Lucina in the gaming room, while the princess was reading the latest Swordsman Weekly magazine. "The crowd would eat you alive if you don't perform well!" The aura Pokemon had told Master Hand about this stand-up comedy idea...though the idea was conjured by Wolf. The pilot didn't want to be viewed as a blundering idiot by Master Hand, so he had Lucario do the dirty work for him.
Lucario: When I had told Master Hand about the stand-up comedy idea, he backhanded me and told me to "stop pulling his leg" before he kicked me out of his room...Then I told him that it was Wolf's idea, and after a change of heart, he let me back in and ordered me to set everything up.
"This is my one and only chance to prove to everyone that I'm not as serious as people make me out to be," explained Lucina. "I'm sick and tired of all the labels applied to me - do you ever get sick of being called an emo Pokemon?"
"Nobody has ever considered me emo, so..." Lucario eyed around the gaming room in confusion, failing to see how he's "emo". Gothitelle and its pre-evolutions could count as emo, but they're obviously more goth than anything.
"Point of the matter is, my goal is to change everyone's perceptions about me, and grant them with newer perceptions that they can remember me by. I want Father, and Robin, and everyone else to be present, so they can see...the new me."
"Said my name?" Robin appeared, magically popping out of nowhere; Lucina shrieked as she jumped in the air and threw the magazine at Robin's face. "'Sephiroth has returned to seek vengeance on Cloud'? No way!" Robin read this feature on the magazine...did he just say that Sephiroth has returned?! And he's seeking Cloud?!
"You scared me Robin, don't you ever do that again," frowned Lucina, clutching her chest, all while ignoring the significant impact of Sephiroth returning. It will be all over if Cloud finds out about this. "Nearly gave me a heart attack..."
"Sorry Lucina, maybe it's because I've been spooked by Master Hand so many times that I've grown accustomed to spooking others! I had frightened Ryu earlier today, I'll make sure to apologize to him later."
Speaking of Ryu, today is the kung fu fighter's birthday, as he is turning 52, believe it or not. Many of the brawlers fell on the latter side of the mantra. It is also today that Ryu plans on carrying out a birthday wish he has planned for sometime, and is too reluctant to enact it.
Ryu: I had made a promise to myself that I would ask Chun-li out on a date on my birthday, and I've been saying this for years now! It may be too late for me, given that I'm turning 52, but it's better late than never!
Yoshi, Toad, Ashley, and Pac-Man met in their usual place, knitting their quilts like there was no tomorrow. Every meeting was mostly the same - Yoshi talking about his adventures with Mario when the plumber was a baby, Toad cheerfully smiling as a presumed tactic to cover up his double life as a drug lord, Ashley emotionless knitting and moping about how unfair life is and how few friends she has, and Pac-Man looking down at the floor, fully regretting knitting that sweater for Shulk back in episode 16. Today seemed like just another usual day for the knitting club, until...
"Just the dinosaur I needed to see!" Ryu approached Yoshi when he was knitting. "I have a huge favor to ask of you, and I've been wondering if your pals can enlist in this favor as well!"
"Anything for the birthday boy!" exclaimed Yoshi, before realizing what he just said. "...or should I say, birthday man!" the dinosaur corrected himself, saving himself from Ryu potentially giving him a shoryuken. That devastating uppercut should not be taken lightly by any means. "So what can I do for ya?"
"As you all may know, today is my birthday, and I have a birthday wish I've been wanting to fulfill for a very long time...and my wish is to ask Chun-li out on a date." The knitting club members, including the usually uncaring Ashley, were suddenly intrigued, for they knew somewhat about Ryu liking Chun-li, although he can be afraid to admit this sometimes. "I want you to find Chun-li, and bring her to this mansion so I can ask her out and be done with it!"
"Why can't you ask Chrom, he's more of an aficionado of romance than Yoshi or any of us are," said Pac-Man. Chrom still refuses to acknowledge that he's a romantic expert, but how would be explain the romantic relationships he has had on the battlefield in the war against Plegia?
"Chrom was my option, but he had involved himself in a similar situation, with Fox and Krystal - I myself had a role in this particular matter - and that didn't end that well. So I don't want to put Chrom through that again, which is why I'm asking Yoshi!"
"Only problem though - I don't even know where Chun-li is!" stated Yoshi. "She could be anywhere, training her butt off! If you want me - or us - to find someone and bring them here, you should at least give me their location!"
"No worries, I do know about Chun-li's whereabouts - according to her Instagram page, she's at a fitness gym downtown in Seattle." The knitting club looks all looked questionably at Ryu, wondering why the kung fu fighter himself isn't taking care of this deed. Is he nervous or insecure? "Why are you looking at me like that, is it wrong to follow you the woman of your dreams on social media? Am I violating a social media unwritten rule?"
Pac-Man: Eh, I'm sure that Ryu can save himself some trouble on his birthday, and just go to this gym and tell Chun-li the good news. He's traveled around the world without breaking a sweat, so what's the difference regarding walking to a gym where your woman is working out?
"We don't think that it's wrong to follow a love interest on social media, plenty of people do it all the time I'm certain," said Toad; pretty sure he does the same thing with Toadette. Those two secretly like each other, they've been paired up in too many Mario games to even deny this. "We just think that since it's your birthday, you should just go to the gym and ask Chun-li out. And don't even give us any excuse about needing a vehicle to drive to the gym, you can walk there for all we care."
"But what if I do make it to the gym, and I when I ask out Chun-li, I begin to stammer and everyone looks at me?" questioned Ryu. "That's what I'm mostly concerned about, I'd rather ask my woman out in the comfort of this mansion, with my fellow brawlers being witnesses rather than strangers!"
"You'd want brawlers to see you ask Chun-li out, can't you just do it in private?" grimaced Ashley, miffed by Ryu's reasoning. "It would be better if you do it in private, if you ask me..."
"However I plan to ask Chun-li out will be up to me. Your task, whether you choose to accept it or not, is to go to the gym, grab that woman, and bring her over here so I can put away the years of regret and ask her out, once and for all!"
"Quick question: should you have done this earlier, when you had the chance?" asked Yoshi, making Ryu grow furious. Dozens of people have asked Ryu similar questions, and more than half of those people found themselves in a hospital bed. Yoshi oughta take back what he said, unless he wants to be one of those hospitalized people. "...forget what I just said, we shall retrieve Chun-li for you." And so Yoshi and the knitting club accepts their mission - will they be successful?
Link and Cloud stood outside the mansion, waiting for the mailman to arrive. But this is not your ordinary mailman - this mailman is none other than the Postman, the Hylian who travels all throughout Hyrule, delivering mail in very unflattering attire. The Postman was making his rounds in Washington, and he had to make sure he stops by the mansion to deliver Link his mail, for the hero of Hyrule rarely gets mail from the postal service. At first, Cloud didn't buy the fact that Link has to get all of his mail from a stinking mailman that runs about delivering mail in white shorts, so the Hylian brought his best friend outside to prove that he's not insane.
"He should be coming any minute," Link said as he glanced at his watch. And soon enough, the Postman appeared, jogging towards Link and Cloud and huffing and puffing, though not as much to blow a little piggy's house down.
"The Postman...has arrived!" the mail deliver struck a pose after coming to a stop. Link and Cloud were both disturbed, especially Link - poor dude might be scarred forever after what he just seen. He has never saw the Postman strike any pose, ever.
Postman: When you run as much as you do, and you don't get enough time to work out...you look like a scrawny string bean. Just look at me, anyone can beat me up...even a handicapped person would beat me to a pulp...
"Okay, I totally did not have to see that," Cloud shielded his eyes as he turned his face away, keeping his sight and sanity intact. "Why don't you give Link his mail already, and you can return to your mail delivering service?"
"I'm getting on it, no need to rush me!" the Postman reached into his tall bag and pulled out two envelopes, giving one them to Link. "Got a special mail for you!" he then handed the other envelope to Cloud, who was surprised to be even receiving mail. Dude hates it when Tifa and Barret hardly ever write any letters to him. "Time for me to go and deliver more wonderful mail. I'll be seeing you boys later!" The Postman ran off, with his trademark jog that may led some to question his fitness.
"Told you I wasn't crazy," Link said to Cloud, who was looking at his envelope with a mortified look. The Hylian took the letter out of his envelope and opened it, seeing that it was addressed from Agitha, the resident bug expert in Hyrule Town who apparently likes being pinched by the insects she collects. "Eh, it's from Agitha, so it can't be that important, I'll just read this later." Link stuffed the letter in his pocket.
"Oh man, this is not good at all..." Cloud shook his head, still mortified with his eyes glued on the envelope. "Hurry, we must alert Mario and Master Hand right away! We have no time to lose!"
"Alert Mario and Master Hand about that?" Cloud didn't have any time for answering Link's question - he hastily grabbed the Hylian's hand and rushed inside the mansion. Clearly some trouble is afoot...
Inside the mansion, Sonic was showing Mario is chili dog recipe in the dining room. The hedgehog enticed the plumber by stating how if he and Peach were to move out, and Peach decides not to cook, he can make chili dogs for any occasion. Mario, knowing Sonic's tendencies, decided to learn the recipe if it would keep Sonic's annoying mouth shut.
"Then you just pour the chili on the hot dog...and BLAM!" Sonic displayed the chili dog in Mario's extremely uninterested face. "You got yourself a chili dog! Man, you look more entertained than Tails did, when I showed him how to make a chili dog, he left me right after the hot dog finished boiling!" Mario could have been spending some quality time with Peach, working towards proposing to her without get denied just like in the second episode, but nope, he chooses to waste his time and patience with Sonic instead. The plumber should really work on his decision-making.
Sonic: Perfecting the best chili dog is one of the hardest things anyone can do, it's on the same grade of difficulty as reconciling with your ex, or walking in a convenience store naked without warranting an arrest (happens to me all the time, not wearing clothes has its setbacks). In order for a chili dog to be perfect, the sausage must be fully cooked, the right amount of chili must be used, and the bun has to be at room temperature - not too hot, or not too cold. If you can master these things, then you will certainly go very far in life, I guarantee it!
The boredom that was displayed in Mario's face soon turned into delight when Link and Cloud showed up in the dining room, with the plumber hoping that these swordsmen could save him from his misery and invite him to participate in anything that has nothing to do with chili dogs. But their looks of concern told Mario that something serious was afoot.
"You boys sure-a do look like your in a rush," Mario remarked. Sonic suddenly became disgruntled that the plumber stopped paying attention to him, and threw his chili dog on the floor in defeat. What an absolute waste of a chili dog...
"I'm afraid we have some very bad news," Cloud handed the envelope to Mario. "Read who it was addressed by..." Mario read the name listed up in the far left corner of the envelope, and his eyes widened with absolute shock.
"S-S-Sephiroth?!" he exclaimed; just saying the name sent chills down his spine. The plumber frantically took the letter out of the envelope and skimmed it, too afraid to read it completely. "He said-a that he's looking for you-a Cloud, and he won't-a stop until he finds-a you and finishes you off-a for good!"
"Eh, I don't see what the big fuss is all about, Sephiroth can't be that huge of a threat," smirked Sonic. "I mean, Cloud has defeated him before, so surely he is in a weakened state..." By the look of things, Sonic could care less about Sephiroth's return, as long as Cloud and company handle the workload.
"There is not telling how strong or weak Sephiroth will be when he shows up, we must be on guard at all times," said Cloud, affirmative that he can defeat his arch-nemesis for another time. "Where is Master Hand, as the head of the mansion he must be informed immediately!"
"Master Hand...he's-a not in the right mind-a frame to be given the news," Mario chuckled nervously. What could be possibly bothering the giant hand?
"Boy we sure did screw things up!" Wario shook his head as he took Pit and Viridi to Master Hand's room. "Stealing that urn was a costly mistake!"
"Was it that significant or something?" asked Viridi; she and her boyfriend were told about Master Hand growing more angry with the day after finding out that his urn is missing. The urn is not exactly missing; Pit had Wario snatch the urn and paint it green, and give it to Palutena as a gift. Now that's going to be extremely costly - one does not simply take one of Master Hand's belongings and expect to get away with it.
Pit: Aw man Viridi, why did you suggest to me that we should have Wario steal that urn?
Viridi: Um, Pit, it was your idea. You found the urn in Master Hand's closet in the first place.
Pit: But how was I supposed to know the urn belongs to Master Hand, he could have been borrowing it for all we know!
Viridi: Master Hand, borrowing stuff? *smirks* Do you not remember the time he "borrowed" Dribble and Spitz's taxi, and he was taken to court because he refused to give it back?
Pit: Oh yeah I remember now...Phoenix Wright saved Master Hand big time...
Wario, Pit, and Viridi finally arrived at Master Hand's room, and looked through the creak of the front door to see the giant hand going off on Geno. Master Hand needed someone to vent off his anger and frustration upon, and Geno was chosen as the unfortunate candidate.
"How dare someone steal my beloved urn!" the hand vented his anger on poor Geno, who had his eyes closed as Master Hand's rant went on. "That urn is no ordinary urn, it's practically the most valuable artifact in existence!"
"Perhaps nobody stole it, it just went missing," Geno said, finally mustering up the courage to speak. He's bound to get yelled at, but it's worth speaking up instead of being yelled in your face.
"Urns don't go missing, Geno, they're not mystical objects that magically grow a set of legs and then waltz away like it's no big deal! They're not rebellious teenagers that run away when they get fed up with life, or if their Tumblr page gets shut down! They're not..."
"Okay, okay, I get it now..." Maybe speaking up wasn't the brightest idea. "I'm sure that whoever stole your urn will be filled with regret, and will return it to your ginormous closet."
"Only a resident brawler would steal something so valuable like an urn - visitors like Yuffie, Amy, and Fiora, I'm not so sure about. But it's definitely a brawler! And if this brawler doesn't come clean, then the rest of the mansion will suffer!"
Wario gulped. Pit really placed this poor fatso in some hot water, and because of him, everyone else will likely suffer.
"Now if you excuse me, I'll go find another person to vent my frustration on, while ranting on about an item they probably don't care about," Master Hand told Geno. "It is imperative that I get all my angry emotions out of my system." The giant hand vanished, leaving a slighted Geno by himself.
Geno: Although it wasn't much, Master Hand's angry outburst is likely to give me nightmares...I'll make sure to keep the lights in my room on for the entire night, certainly my roommate Toad won't mind...
"Geno, you got a minute?" Pit asked the star (yes, he's a star, the Mario Wikipedia even confirms it) as he entered Master Hand's room. "I'm responsible for Master Hand's urn - I had found it in his closet, and I had made Wario retrieve it and give it to Palutena as a gift. And now I've messed things all up..."
"Don't look so down, honestly I would have done the same exact thing," assured Geno, making Pit's face light up with joy. It's great to have others look out for you and support you for your degrading decisions.
"Aw, you really mean that? What a buddy you are, always sticking up for..."
"Nah, I didn't really mean what I said, I'm just giving you false hope." And with that, Pit held his head in sadness... "But if you want, I can retrieve that urn for you, otherwise you and Wario will be the culprits and everyone will hate you for it." ...right before bringing his head back up with a smile on his face.
"Thank you Geno, you're the man!" the angel excitedly shook the star's hand. "What I would do without a guy like you..."
"Of all the people Pit could have enlisted, and it had to be Geno?" Wario, who saw the scene unfold through the door creak, frowned as he folded his arms. "What can Geno possibly do?"
"Well, he could clear your name before you become a culprit, and save you from being one of the most hated individuals in the mansion," replied Viridi. "It's not like you have any other choice, unless you want to make a coward move and move away..."
Viridi's response prompted Wario to keep his mouth shut; the fatso doesn't own a vehicle (too stingy to pay for one, or make monthly car payments), so he'll trust Pit and Geno - though his trust is not that high.
Taking a short break from their Star Records expenditures, Fox and Falco were outside near the mansion's lake, fishing for some fish type Pokemon. They were fishing with their Super Rods - the best Pokemon fishing rod out there, bar none - hoping to catch a super rare Pokemon.
Fox: For our fishing expenditure to prove fruitful, Falco and I must capture a fish Pokemon that is super rare, so we can gloat about it in front of everyone whether they like it or not. Gyarados, Corphish, Basculin - as cool as those Pokemon are, they're pretty common, and therefore they'll be released back into the water if catched. Right Falco? *looks behind him* ...You're not...playing Pokemon GO, are you? I mean, we have every non-legendary Pokemon in existence in the sanctuary...
Falco: Not now bro, I gotta catch 'em all, just like what that tagline says...Darn it, I whiffed my attempt at catching that Growlithe! And now there's a Pidgey near the recycling stuff...Oh wait, it's a regular pigeon...
"What a great day to go out fishing!" Bowser said to Corrin as the walked along the lakeside with their fishing rods. Bowser carried a Good Rod, and Corrin carried an Old Rod - the Koopa King told the prince of Nohr that the Old Rod is the most effective fishing rod, since its oldness allows it to catch fish Pokemon of all ages and generations. You would have to be a highly ignorant Pokemon trainer to even believe this fib.
"Not a single cloud in the sky," Corrin looked up at the sky, and hopefully he didn't look at the sun, for if he looked at the sun for a prolonged period of time, he would go blind in an instant. "This is a great opportunity for some great fishing! I see Fox and Falco are already fishing right now! We should go join them!"
"No kid, not a good idea - Fox and Falco are going to focus on catching the crappy Pokemon - the Pokemon that trainers would release into the wild or sell to Team Rocket for some cold hard cash. Me and you, on the other hand, are gonna catch the awesome Pokemon - the Pokemon that will make a good impression on you!"
"Care to join us for some fine fishing?" Falco asked Bowser and Corrin after he and Fox took notice of them. "We could really use some more fishing buddies; Villager and Toon Link could have been here, but they're too busy playing volleyball in the backyard apparently."
"Ignore them Corrin, they're just being nice with you so when you have a batch of awesome fish Pokemon, they'll know to take advantage of you and steal your fish when you least expect it!" Bowser whispered this in Corrin's ear. The prince won't have to worry about his awesome Pokemon being stolen, because he won't even have any awesome Pokemon caught in the first place. "Now throw the fishing reel in the water, and let's catch ourselves some Pokemon!"
So Corrin threw the fishing bob in the water, and Bowser did the same. Fox and Falco inspected their fishing rods, seeing that Bowser has a Good Rod, and Corrin an Old Rod; both pilots looked at each other questionably, and Falco shrugged, quietly implying that they should just ignore the Koopa King and the prince for the time being.
"Bowser I think I got a catch!" Corrin joyfully exclaimed as his fishing rod was tugged by something in the water. "I got a catch Bowser, I didn't expect it to come this soon!"
"Well what are you waiting on, reel that thing in!" commanded Bowser, and Corrin reeled in...a Psyduck. Not exactly on the same level of lameness as Magikarp or Feebas, but still pretty lame regardless. "Hoo boy, that's one of the best Pokemon there is, what a catch!" Fox and Falco watched with shocked expressions and their mouths agape as Psyduck continuously rubbed his head, suffering from the headache it experiences for almost all his lifetime. Only an evolution is able to cure a severe headache like the one the duck Pokemon has to go through.
Bowser: The best thing about fishing with Corrin is that the kid's Pokemon knowledge will be exposed - he thinks the only Pokemon that exists those that count as brawlers, and those that serve as assists in battles through the use of a Poke ball. So whenever he sees a new Pokemon, he'll instantly think that the Pokemon ranks with Mewtwo in terms of greatness!
"Really, that's what you call a catch?" Fox scoffed, slowly beginning to realize that Bowser is taking advantage of Corrin. "Would have been much better if it was a Golduck, if you ask me." Suddenly Falco's fishing rod was being tugged, and the avian pilot reeled in a Relicanth, the longevity Pokemon.
"Check it out, it's a Relicanth, this Pokemon is definitely rare!" exclaimed Falco. The fact that Relicanth is deemed a fossil and has remained unchanged for millions of years slightly makes this Pokemon more rarer, and even more cooler. But Bowser didn't seem to agree with the latter.
"Boo, that Pokemon flat out sucks!" he jeered. "Why would you want a living fossil Pokemon in the first place, that thing looks ugly and hideous! So what if it's rare, doesn't make up for its appearance!" Keep in mind that Bowser doesn't mean these things, he's just leaving an impression on Corrin.
"Trying to act all shallow, huh? We'll see about that...Relicanth, use...uh, um...use..." Falco doesn't know what moves the wild Relicanth has in its moveset - but he does know that the longevity Pokemon is a Rock-type. "Use a Rock-type move, or something, on that giant turtle creature before you!"
At the command of Falco, Relicanth used Ancient Power - a strong indicator that this Pokemon is high-leveled, he can only learn it at level 43 - generating a ball of energy and firing it at Bowser, sending him back as he traveled through the ground. Bowser ran over to his mentor, to check on him - why would anyone want to check on Bowser in the first place?
"First he called me by the wrong species..." Bowser growled, apparently miffed by the fact that Falco called him a giant turtle creature, as Corrin helped him up. "...and then he ordered that Pokemon to attack me for speaking facts! This means war..."
Looks like an epic fishing battle of sorts is brewing. Who shall prevail and come out victorious? (You probably know the answer already.)
Mario was gathered with Link, Cloud, Sonic, Peach, Zelda, and Aerith in the meeting room, to discuss Sephiroth seeking his vengeance on Cloud and vowing to find the swordsman at all costs. This one-winged angel is quite a dangerous foe, and must be stopped at once - who knows the destruction he would bring!
"Aerith, you know-a Sephiroth as much as Cloud-a does," Mario said to the flower girl. "Tell us what-a you know about-a Sephiroth, tell us what it like-a to have been killed-a by him!"
"But I was never even killed by Sephiroth in the first place, or anyone else for that matter..." Aerith pointed out; everyone looked around, wondering if Aerith was living in her own planet. "Last time I saw Sephiroth, he and Cloud got into this huge fight, and then they flew up into the sky..."
Aerith: Apparently everybody still thinks that I was murdered by Sephiroth, but I don't ever recall this happening...I do believe that those who accuse me of being killed had saw a girl that looked like me, and Sephiroth had killed her.
"Sephiroth and I never flew up in the sky anywhere," Cloud responded with his arms folded. Whatever that's coming out of Aerith's mouth must have been some sort of wacko dream she had, at least that's how Cloud feels. "Also where did this 'fight' take place at?"
"Hello everyone, don't think you forgot about me!" the excitable pink hedgehog none other than Amy Rose popped her head through the meeting room door, waving to everyone. She came at the right time, right before Cloud and the others could begin question Aerith about this so-called fight that ended with both Cloud and Sephiroth flying in the sky. Did they grow a set of wings or something, did a drink a special kind of Red Bull that actually gave them wings? At this point, who knows.
"How did you even know we were having a meeting?" Sonic questioned his woman as she took a seat next to the blue hedgehog. "And don't think you can just waltz in here without giving me a chili dog, I'm starvin'!" This wouldn't have been the case had Sonic not thrown the chili dog he did in his demonstration for Mario on the dining room floor.
"Girlfriend's intuition," Amy tapped her head with her finger, answering Sonic's question about the meeting. "As for your chili dog...I'm sure you can put your laziness aside and make one yourself!"
"Eh, already made one today and I wasted it, don't planning on making another dog." Sonic then glared at Mario, who simply shrugged - it's not the plumber's fault he's wasn't interested in learning how to make a chili dog, and he agreed to see to save himself from becoming irritated.
"In order to counter whatever-a Sephiroth has planned, we must conjure an idea that-a will prove effective," Mario continued with the meeting. "Anyone have-a any suggestions?" Amy happily raised her hand, hoping that Mario would call on her. "Alright Amy, what idea do-a you possibly have?"
"Since we don't know what this Sephiroth person is capable of...why not have a sacrificial lamb when he comes to the mansion?" the pink hedgehog suggested. Mario mused over the suggestion; he had expected Amy to come up with something silly, but boy was he surprised!
"In order for the plan to work, we need the perfect person to serve as this sacrificial lamb," explained Zelda. "Lloyd Irving can't be our candidate, we've used him one too many times which means that he's used up all of his worth..."
Zelda: Lloyd? We practically use him as a sacrifice for almost any situation we have. Wild Sharpedo in the lake? Get Lloyd to dispose of it. Need to retrieve your hairbrush from a bathroom Wario just used? Send Lloyd in there. Doc Louis and Captain Falcon fight over seconds at dinner? Have Lloyd serve as the peacemaker. Granted, Lloyd seldom makes it out of each situation unscathed, but having him as a sacrificial lamb is sadly the only thing he's good for...
"Why not have Ness serve as the sacrifice?" suggested Peach. "He's brave enough to handle whatever Sephiroth has in store!" Not to mention that Ness has PSI powers, which he can use to keep Sephiroth at bay at the moment.
"He would be better than Lucas that's for sure, though that's not much of an improvement," Link stroked his chin. "But we have no other choice, we gotta pick someone ASAP!"
"Then Ness-a it is!" confirmed Mario. The plumber then looked around, searching for a certain assistant. "Where on-a earth is Isabelle, thought I told her about-a this meeting!"
"Right here, Sir Mario!" Isabelle rushed inside the meeting room, carrying a mug of coffee in her paws, and then coming to a stop, taking a breather. "Sorry I was so late, the coffee machine in the cafe was broken, and it took Mega Man forever to fix it!" Really, using Mega Man in her excuse? C'mon, Isabelle, you're better than this!
"Go find-a Ness and tell him that we're-a using him as a sacrificial lamb-a for Sephiroth. If he refuses..." Mario got a taser out, and pressed the button as electricity flowed through the tip; the others were wide-eyed and felt very concerned... "...give-a him a shock, and see if he-a comes around!"
"You want me to taser Ness if he turns down the offer?! Also, isn't that Samus' taser, you didn't steal it from her, didn't you?"
"What, do you think-a I'm Popple, the Shadow Thief? I asked Samus if I could-a borrow this taser and promised-a that I would use-a it for 'authoritative measures'." Link, Cloud, Sonic, Peach, Zelda, Aerith, and Amy glanced at each other with questionable looks, in disbelief that Samus would willingly give away her taser for Mario, unsure if he's backing on his promise, while Mario handed the taser to Isabelle. "Now go find-a that boy!"
"Y-Yes sir!" Isabelle scurried out of the meeting room, taser in hand. Poor dog may not handle this mission well - she would probably throw the taser out of a mansion window out of fright, and then Samus would blame Mario forever if the taser is nowhere to be found.
"Sephiroth thinks that he can-a have his 'vengeance' and wreck destruction everywhere he-a goes...but when (or if) he comes-a here, we'll be ready for-a him!" Originally it was Cloud that's supposed to be planning this counterattack against Sephiroth, but it appears that Mario is taking charge of things - and the blonde swordsman is weary about the end result.
Chrom: Words cannot begin to describe how proud I am of my darling Lucina, stepping up to the plate and wanting to perform stand-up comedy for everyone (hope Ryu can be in attendance, that would be a birthday treat). I would feel a lot more proud about my daughter...if she can come up with better material. I've overheard some of the jokes she was telling, and they were the definition of cringe. But don't tell that to the audience she's practicing her jokes on...
"And so that's why Santa Claus signed with Star Record, to improve his 'wrapping' skills!" Lucina told this joke to an audience of Pikachu, Pichu, Jigglypuff, Greninja, and Duck Hunt Dog, in the mansion's storage room surrounded by large boxes. The princess followed up her crappy joke with some canned laughter- laughter that sounded so fake it absolutely hurts, due to the fact that Lucina rarely laughs at all. The Duck Hunt Dog applauded in response to Lucina's joke, though this can be easily perceived as pity clapping.
"How's your rehearsing coming along?" Robin popped up behind Lucina, scaring the princess and making her jump in the air in right. She turned around, and was relieved to see Robin, cheesily smiling at her. "Whoops, looks like I scared you again, guess it's become a strong habit of mine!"
"Don't scare my like that ever again..." Lucina took a deep breath, clutching her chest. She's stoic and serious 24/7, but all it takes is for Robin scaring her to bring out the princess's emotions.
"Said that the last time I scared you - you're not being cliche, are you?" Robin raised an eyebrow at Lucina, who playfully pushed the mage away. "Anyways, why do you have these boxes stacked atop one another, want to be a builder or something? And why are the Pokemon...and Duck Hunt Dog, your audience?"
"Lucario said that it would be wise if I practice my jokes on the Pokemon and Duck Hunt Dog before I practice on actual people. So I decided to do just that in this storage room, where I can have peace and quiet, and solitude and..."
Lucina was abruptly cut off when the boxes were magically lifted up in the air, and Master Hand appeared. Although you can't tell, the giant hand seems very displeased.
"What did I tell you fools about building forts in the storage room?" he growled at Lucina and Robin, even though the latter did nothing wrong. "Trying to make out in the privacy of the storage room, I assume?"
"Why, I would never do such a thing!" Lucina was deeply offended by Master Hand's question about making out, and Robin had a confused look on his face - does Lucina not want to make out with him, is there another man more worthy than Robin?
Robin: When Lucina said that she would never make out with me, I was struck in my heart...I understand that Lucina is individualistic, but her individualism cannot prevent her from expressing her true emotions, and I feel that I'm the only person (aside from Chrom, that is) than can bring out the best of her.
"Lucina was just practicing for her stand-up gig at the gaming room, and I know that she's been working her butt off to make the best of her experience," explained Robin. Lucina couldn't help but smile at Robin's remark - she was even on the verge of blushing, she has never heard the mage talk about her like that.
"Well I'm sorry, but this whole practicing thing has to take place somewhere else," stated Master Hand. "This storage room contains top-secret crud that nobody can know about."
"So why is the door to this room is unlocked?" Ooh, Robin is using logic against Master Hand...sometimes using logic against a powerful hardly ends well.
"That is a question that will be answered another time, right now I want you two to take Duck Hunt Dog and the Pokemon, and leave this room at once!" Robin should feel very grateful that Master Hand has decided to spare him, the giant hand could have turned his face inside out! The mage and Lucina guided did as they were told, guiding Duck Hunt Dog and the Pokemon out of the storage room.
"You guys-a all set to go?" Luigi asked the knitting club members - Yoshi, Toad, Ashley, and Pac-Man - as they were sitting in the plumber's car, with Luigi ready to drive them to a gym downtown, where Chun-li is working out at. The mission at hand? Kidnap the kung fu heroine, and bring her to the mansion so Ryu can ask her out on a date. Luigi set his newly repaired Dodge Charger into ignition, and drove out of the driveway and to the gym. "I'm so proud-a of you guys, willing to go the extra mile-a to do something for Ryu's birthday!"
"And what an extra mile it is..." Ashley grumbled, folding her arms and looking out the window. As you may know, this young witch has a tough time getting along with others, and that may bode problems for the knitting club.
Toad: So here's how the plan is gonna go - since Ashley and Pac-Man refuse to go inside the gym, it'll be up to me and Yoshi to retrieve Chun-li and bring her inside Luigi's car. According to Ryu, Chun-li should be wearing her brown hair in a ponytail, and should be wearing black workout gear. Yoshi: How does Ryu know this information? He checked Chun-li's Instagram page before we went out...what a creep.
Toad: Says the dinosaur who writes romantic fanfiction...didn't you tell me the other day that you're planning on pairing Samus with Jacky Bryant, and having Akira as the third wheel?
Yoshi: Yes, such a pairing can happen in real life! Blondes have a lot more in common than you think!
Luigi arrived at the gym, stopping the car, and by the looks of it the gym was fully packed. Yoshi and Toad may have their work cut out for them.
"We'll-a be waiting outside for your-a return," Luigi told the two as they exited the car and entered the gym, sack in hand. Luigi then turned around to face Ashley and Pac-Man, who were simply minding their own business hoping that Luigi wouldn't attempt to spark a conversation with them. But soon all their hopes will be dashed away, when Luigi opened his mouth. "What do you think is-a Toad's and Yoshi's success-a rate in finding Chun-li?"
"Given how many people are in the gym, I'd say their chances are very, very slim," replied Pac-Man. "I'm worried that they nab the wrong girl, and then Ryu gets all angry with them. Knowing Ryu, they'd probably end up in a hospital for a week, or a month even!"
"Who cares if they get Chun-li or not, I just wanna go home already," grumbled a bitter Ashley. Her desire to return home soon ended, when...
"We got her, we finally got her!" Yoshi frantically ran outside the gym, with Toad right behind him carrying a sack in his puny arms. Yoshi and Toad actually kidnapped Chun-li that fast without being caught, is this real life?!
"Excellent-a work, you two!" Luigi commended the two kidnappers as they entered the Charger. "So how did-a you do it?"
"It's simple, we drugged her when no one was looking, and threw her in this sack when she fell asleep!" explained Toad, leaving Luigi, Pac-Man, and Ashley with looks of concern. And you thought Toad wasn't a drug lord, shame on you...
"...How did you even drug her in the first place?" asked a concerned Pac-Man, worried about Toad's potential second life of drug dealing.
"No matter, we have-a to get Chun-li to the mansion so Ryu can-a finally ask her out!" Luigi turned his Charger back in ignition and stepped on the gas pedal, rolling out and driving back to the mansion.
The fishing battle between the Star Fox pilots, Fox and Falco, and Bowser and Corrin was still raging on, and so far it's looking pretty one-sided. While the pilots have caught Pokemon such as a Kingdra, Lumineon, Gorebyss, and several other different water-type Pokemon, Bowser and Corrin have caught a Magikarp, Feebas, Psyduck...well, they just caught the same three species over and over again. No variety appeared to exist with the teacher and his protege's fishing expenditure, for they have repeatedly thrown any Pokemon not named Magikarp, Feebas, or Psyduck back in the water - it's crucial towards Corrin's "learning".
Greninja: *walks by the lake, sees Corrin catch a Magikarp and exchanging an empathetic high-five with Bowser, walks away facepalming out of shame*
"Mind if I join you guys?" Villager approached the Star Fox pilots, Bowser, and Corrin, holding his fishing rod. "I wanna catch some fish Pokemon on my own..."
"Get lost you twerp, we're having an epic fishing battle, and we can't have a loser like you distract us!" frowned Bowser as he lobbed his fishing bait in the water. Not exactly an epic fishing battle, but whatever supposedly helps Corrin.
"Yeah you heard the man, how about you go fishing in Lloyd's new fish bowl, and catch yourself a goldfish or something!" retorted Falco. When the avian pilot gets competitive, he can be very hot-blooded, though he's very much like this most of the time. It's one of his few personality flaws that makes him somewhat polarizing.
"Guess I don't belong here..." Villager sighed and walked away, hoping to fish with the Star Fox pilots, or even Bowser or Corrin one of these days.
Villager: Eh, what's the point of fishing, I'm gonna keep on catching the same ol' Feebas...almost as if the Pokemon animal kingdom has a vendetta against me...
Having been kicked out of the storage room, Lucina relocated her stand-up comedy rehearsal to the lounge, continuing to practice on the Pokemon (Greninja had left because he couldn't take it anymore) and Duck Hunt Dog. This time, Robin was also in attendance, listening attentively to Lucina's jokes. Let's see how the princess is doing...
"So the other day, when I was in the forest, I found some fog, and I tried to take a picture of it on my cellphone, but you won't believe what happened..." Lucina started off her joke.
"What happened?" asked Robin, nearly on the edge of the seat for whatever reason, it's not like the joke is ripe with suspense or anything.
"I tried to take a picture but...I mist!" Lucina followed this joke with her awfully fake laughter, and Robin was laughing along with Lucina (his laugh was genuine, unlike Lucina's), slapping his knee and wiping away a tear.
"Get it? She said she MIST!" Robin said this to the Pokemon and Duck Hunt Dog, before laughing for a few more seconds. Duck Hunt Dog faced the Pokemon, making a circling motion near the side of his head with his index finger and pointing at Robin to indicate that the mage may have completely lost it, and Pikachu, Pichu, and Jigglypuff all nodded in agreement. Ness happened to walk by, and Robin asked him, "Did you hear the joke Lucina just told?"
"Heard it from the couch I was sitting at," responded Ness. "Honestly that joke was..."
"I think that joke was great, two thumbs up, ten out of ten!" Clearly Robin is doing his all-time best to make Lucina feel more confident and comfortable about her material, but as you can see, the mage is trying a bit too hard.
"Robin, you should seriously work on your definition of 'great', apparently a lot of people use that word out of context, and you just might be one of those people." Robin glanced at Lucina, who know held her head down in shame, as Ness walked away - only to be approached by the ever-excitable Isabelle, who was wagging her tail with the taser in her paws. Though her excitement could be interpreted as nervousness.
"Um, Ness, I was wondering if you could guard the mansion, in the event...Cloud's mortal enemy, Sephiroth, comes by here..." Isabelle started before trailing off, hesitant to taser Ness if the young lad says no.
"If nobody else is available, then I can do it," Ness replied with a shrug. Isabelle breathed a sigh of relief, fortunately she doesn't have to use the taser - the very taser that belongs to Samus, who was attentively standing near the shih tzu with her arms folded.
Ness: Am I a little intimidated about having to come face-to-face with someone like Sephiroth? Understandably, yes, but every now and then you gotta step to the plate...and poor Lucas rarely does that, much to my chagrin.
"Did...Mario...give you my taser?" Samus asked Isabelle, making the shih tzu feel nervous. "Don't be so shy now, just tell the truth and I'll try to spare you."
"Yes, Mario gave me your taser and wanted me to taser Ness if he didn't comply with fending the mansion from Sephiroth's impeding visit," explained Isabelle, slightly shuddering. Hard for the dog not to feel nervous around Samus, that bounty hunter can intimidate almost anyone with her lovely stare.
"Oh that sounds like Mario, why am I not surprised...can I have my taser back?" Isabelle handed Samus back her taser, and the bounty hunter clipped the taser to her zero suit so she can put it back in her room. "I think Mario and the others want to speak with you, I believe they're in the gaming room."
The threesome of Pit, Kirby, and Geno stealthily sneaked inside Palutena's room, hoping to retrieve the urn and return it to Master Hand before everyone in the mansion receives punishment. The urn was sitting atop the goddess of light's dresser, and it was up to Pit and company to grab that urn before Palutena or anyone else catches them.
"You guys stay put, I'll get the urn," Pit whispered to Geno and Kirby as the angel tip-toed towards the dresser, slowly reaching towards the urn with his fingers outstretched...and by the time Pit grabbed the urn and held it in his hands, Palutena opened the door and caught her darling angel red-handed.
"Pit...why do you have my urn in your possession?" the goddess of light asked her pupil, more than ready to slap a punishment on Pit if necessary. She's become quite the pro at doling punishments to Pit, for the angel can be very troublesome.
"He's wanting to see if the paint on the urn dried out," stated Geno, sticking up for Pit. "The paint on that urn is unlike any other, it takes forever to fully dry out."
"Aw, is that so Pit?" Palutena asked the angel; Pit nodded with a cheesy grin. "Always great to see you're looking out for me, and the stuff that I own! Sorry if I had any doubts about what you may have been doing, I'll just get my things and leave you and your pals be!" The goddess of light grabbed her jewelry case and exited the room, closing the door behind her; Pit let out a sigh of relief and wiped away the sweat from his forehead. "Thanks Geno, you're a lifesaver! Knew you would come in handy!"
"It was no problem, anything to save your hide," replied Geno. Would have been fun for Geno to see Pit berated by Palutena, but this time around he decided to give it a pass.
Palutena: When I saw Pit holding the urn Wario had given to me in his hands I was ready to scold him and ground him, but as Geno said, Pit was just checking to see if the paint dried. Maybe I shouldn't be so censorious with Pit, he's not all that bad!
Geno: True story, I assisted Wario with painting the urn - partly because he was wearing that Wolverine suit, and it made it hard to hold a paintbrush - and the paint we used was regular paint. And Palutena bought my claim that it was a special kind of paint. Goes on to show you that she's not as level-headed as she seems, but then again we're all that way.
"Let's get out of here!" Pit exited the room, urn in his possession, with Kirby and Geno following after the angel. The three ran past the vending machine room, and Kirby could hear Master Hand yelling at someone; the pink puffball called out to Pit and Geno, motioning them to come to the vending machine room so they can eavesdrop on Master Hand.
"Master Hand, there's no need to feel so ticked, it's just a lousy urn," said Zero, who was receiving his verbal abuse from the giant hand. But the robot wasn't alone - Mr. Game and Watch, who's responsible for restocking the vending machines, is also in on this verbal abuse.
"Just a lousy urn, you say?!" an offended Master Hand slapped Zero, but only with his finger, for using his five fingers would bode to be very powerful. "Do you not realize the mighty powers of the urn? When opened, the urn can suck in any mortal inside, trapping them until it is opened again. It's like a genie lamp of sorts!" Pit looked down at the urn in his hands, weary about its immense power. "I shall punish the entire mansion if it's lost forever!"
"Chilax, Master Hand, by the sounds of it, the urn must be mystical or something, it might reappear in your closet, or even in your room!" Master Hand didn't buy Zero's claim, he knows more about the urn than anyone.
"...We better bring this urn back to Master Hand's room, or else!" Pit said to Geno and Kirby, as they made their way to Master Hand's room ASAP.
Luigi took the knitting club to their usual meeting place, and there they rested the sack containing Chun-li on a table. Did the club fulfill their mission? Only one way to find out...
"Time-a to see what we got-a here..." Luigi approached the sack and opened it...and his face sank. Not a very good sign at all. "...Yoshi?...Toad?"
"Yes, Luigi, is anything the matter?" asked Yoshi with his fingers crossed, failing to see Luigi's worried facial expression.
"...Are you-a sure you grabbed the right person?" Sweat began to pour down Luigi's face, another bad sign of what could be a failed mission. Intrigued, Pac-Man went over to the table to see who was inside, and his eyes bulged out.
"You guys didn't get Chun-li..." he said in a very nervous tone, his voice shaking. "Instead you got...Tifa Lockhart!" Indeed, Yoshi and Toad had kidnapped the Final Fantasy heroine, eco-terrorist, and bar owner, who was still asleep. Expect Luigi and the knitting club to catch some hands from Tifa when she wakes up.
Toad: Ryu specifically said that Chun-li had her brown hair in a ponytail and that she's wearing black workout clothes! How were we supposed to differentiate her from Tifa? Ryu's fault for not being descriptive enough.
"Have you completed your mission?" Ryu burst through the door, carrying a punching bag over his shoulders. Luigi and the knitting club quickly closed the sack and grinned innocently at the kung fu fighter (Ashley being the only exception).
"Yeah we sure have, you can always count on us to get the job done!" exclaimed a nervous Toad.
"Chun-li is still fast asleep - Toad and Yoshi had to drug her - but we're certain she'll wake up very soon!" added Ashley, hoping Ryu would see this through.
"Excellent, certainly she'll be awake so I can ask her out!" This made Luigi and the knitting club even more nervous. "Now if you excuse me, I'll be heading to the gaming room so the others can sing happy birthday to me, before Lucina puts me to sleep with her lackluster stand-up comedy act!" Dang, even Ryu knows that Lucina is going to do poorly in her first stand-up comedy gig... "I expect to see Chun-li soon!"
Ryu exited the room, and just after the fighter left, Tifa awoke from her slumber as she rose out of the sack, yawning and stretching her arms, before opening her eyes and examining her whereabouts.
"Hey, where am I?" she looked around, wondering how she ended up in the room she was in. She saw Luigi and the knitting club looking at her, making her even more confused.
"We're-a screwed..." remarked Luigi. Got a lot of explaining to do...
Isabelle arrived at the gaming room, where several brawlers such as Chrom, King Dedede, R.O.B, and plenty of others were seated, waiting for Lucina's stand-up comedy act to begin. The princess stood on the stage, preparing herself by taking a short breather, while Lucario organized things on stage to make sure everything was in order.
Lucario: I went throughout the mansion promoting Lucina, telling the others about her doing stand-up comedy in the gaming room. Some agreed to attend and support Lucina...while others are assuming that I've been possessed by Crazy Hand.
"I know you'll do great, just be natural and everything else will work out perfectly," Robin went on stage to give Lucina this advice before returning to his seat, just in time before King K. Rool could beat him to it. Lucina flashed a smile, taking Robin's words to heart.
"This is pointless, why are we even here?" grumbled Link, who was in attendance with Mario, Peach, Zelda, Cloud, Aerith, Sonic, and Amy in the gaming room, waiting to see Lucina tell some (corny) jokes. "Sephiroth could be on his way as I speak!"
"It's all a part of Mario's plan, and Amy apparently suggested having the plan come to a conclusion at Lucina's stand-up comedy act, after Lucario told us about it," explained Cloud. "I have no idea why Mario was down on the idea, knew I should have taken the leadership role when I had the chance..."
Sonic: Having Ness stand around and prevent Sephiroth from entering the mansion isn't gonna solve anything - we should have Ness call Sephiroth a degrading name, so he can hurt the dude's feelings and he won't come back here ever again! Why not call Sephiroth..."Suckiroth"?
Link: *raising an eyebrow* Suckiroth? Sounds a lot like... *stops, catches himself* You know what, I'm ending this conversation, I'm done... *gets up and walks away from Sonic*
Sonic: Link, where are you going? *gets up and chases after Link* Wait up for me!
"I informed Ness about his role in fending Sephiroth from entering the mansion, he says he'll do it!" Isabelle told Mario after finding the plumber seated in his chair.
"Great-a job Isabelle, knew Ness would-a come around!" nodded Mario. "Our plan is now-a finally complete!" Isabelle was taken back by what Mario said, certainly there are more objectives that should be fulfilled.
"But sir Mario, what if Sephiroth makes it past Ness and enters the mansion?"
"Ike, Marth, and Roy will-a be in the foyer to take-a him on!" Three heads are better than one, as many would say.
"...and if Sephiroth makes it past them?"
"The Koopalings will ambush-a Sephiroth and prevent him from-a advancing!" The Koopalings are certainly the annoying bunch, they can seriously get on Sephiroth's nerves.
"...and if Sephiroth makes it past them?"
"Doc-a Louis and Little Mac will give-a Sephiroth the beating of a lifetime, making him wish-a he was never born!" Born, created, go ahead and pick your poison.
"...and if Sephiroth makes it past them?"
"Run along-a now Isabelle, this plan will work-a itself out, just you wait-a and see..." Mario pushed Isabelle along, and the shih tzu scurried away, uncertain that the plan will prove to be successful.
Ness confidently stood at the front door of the mansion, with his hands on his hips waiting for Sephiroth to show up. At the lake, the fishing battle between the Star Fox pilots and Bowser and Corrin came to a very undramatic close.
"Sorry about your loss you two, hopefully you can recover from your defeat," Bowser apologized to Fox and Falco, although the pilots caught better and different Pokemon than the Koopa Kinng and his student.
"Uh, yeah sure, whatever helps you and Corrin go to sleep at night," replied Fox, not wanting to anger Bowser and likely end up at the bottom of the lake.
Corrin: Going fishing with Bowser and engaging in an exciting fishing battle with Fox and Falco was a fun learning experience! Through Bowser, I learned that Magikarp, Feebas, and Psyduck are the three coolest Water-type Pokemon out there, and that all the other Water-type Pokemon are irrelevant!...So why do Pokemon fans pay so much attention to legendaries like Suicine and Manaphy?
Suddenly a wicked black-and-white thunderbolt from the sky struck the field, revealing a man with long silver hair, black coat, black trousers, and black boots. This individual is none other than the Final Fantasy antagonist Sephiroth, and Fox, Falco, Bowser, and Corrin were all in awe of the one-winged angel (technically Sephiroth is not a one-winged angel anymore, but it's a famous moniker so he'll take what he gets).
"So this is the wretched Smash Mansion..." Sephiroth gazed up at the mansion, analyzing its structure and appearance. He then looked to his right, and saw the Badniks putting on the finishing touches on Master Hand's statue. "That hand is getting his own statue?" The one-winged angel shook his head in dismay. "Blasphemous..."
Sephiroth walked towards the entrance of the Smash Mansion, and walked up the front steps towards the front door, where Ness' legs were shaking at the sight of the one-winged angel. At first the young lad thought he might have had a chance, but at the sight of Sephiroth, he grew extremely nervous and weary about his well-being.
"Hark to my words, young boy, if you truly value your life, you'll move out of the way and let me inside, so I can finish off Cloud once and for all," Sephiroth threatened, taking out his sword, Masamune. Before he could harm Ness...
"Stay back, you evil fiend!" the Flying Man swooped in to save the day, protecting Ness from Sephiroth. "Don't fear Ness, for I am your..."
Fox, Falco, Bowser, and Corrin watched in horror as Sephiroth struck the Flying Man with his Masamune sword, sending him flying over the horizon, before entering the Smash Mansion, brushing Ness aside. The four looked down at the ground, and saw that a majority of the Water-type Pokemon they caught were gone, likely returning to their watery abode after that thunderbolt struck the ground - only Pokemon left standing were Relicanth and Magikarp.
"Corrin...go to the garden shed and get my rare candies," ordered Bowser as he eyed the flailing Magikarp. You probably know what's bound to happen...
Once inside the mansion, Sephiroth found himself in the foyer, confronted by Ike, Marth, and Roy. He expected to see Cloud once he opened the door, but now he's assuming that his arch-nemesis is a full-blown coward for not showing up.
"Don't think you can get past us Sephiroth, you're gonna wish you never came here!" Ike said to the one-winged angel. The three Fire Emblem swordsmen all charged at Sephiroth at once, engaging the one-winged angel in a three-vs-one battle. However, it would be Sephiroth who would prevail, as he was left standing while the swordsman trio writhed on the floor in pain.
"My Masamune must have been too much for the three of you," Sephiroth smirked evilly as he continued on his way, in his search to find Cloud. When the coast was clear, Roy reached into his pocket and pulled out a walkie-talkie.
"Roy to Mario, I repeat, Roy to Mario!" the red-haired swordsman said into the communication device. "Sephiroth is fastly approaching, time to send out your 'secret weapon'!"
Bowser Jr.: Sephiroth will be facing me and my Koopaling siblings here on the second floor, granted he gets past Ike and company. Honestly I'm a bit afraid, and so are the others, but...oh snap, there he is now!
Sephiroth arrived at the second floor of the mansion, his Cloud Strife senses tingling, and encountered Bowser Jr. and the Koopalings, who all got into position.
"Ain't no way you're getting past us!" Larry pointed at the one-winged angel. "Let's get him, you guys!" The eight delinquent koopas all charged at Sephiroth, pulling on his hair, tugging on his coat, and toying with his Masamune sword. Once Sephiroth retained his sword, he used it to take out Bowser Jr. and the Koopalings, one by one, until they were on the floor.
"Insolent children, just like your father..." Sephiroth shook his head as he continued up the Smash Mansion, his Cloud Strife senses tingling even more. Pit, Geno, and Kirby saw Sephiroth making his way towards the staircase from the distance.
"Forget going to Master Hand's room..." Pit said to his comrades. "Follow me, I got a plan..."
Sephiroth made it to the third floor of the mansion undeterred, and as he walked through the hallways, he stopped in amazement when he saw standing there Aerith Gainsborough - the woman he supposedly killed.
"A-Aerith Gainsborough?" the one-winged angel is clearly at a loss of words - certainly for him this must be a ghost, coming back to haunt him.
"Yup, that's me!" gleamed Aerith. "Thought you killed me, didn't you? Well I hate to burst your bubble Sephiroth, but the Aerith you killed at the altar...was an impostor!"
"How can this be?!" Sephiroth fell to the ground, clutching his head. "How could I have been possibly deceived like this?!" The one-winged angel is finding it hard to grasp the fact that he killed a "fake" Aerith, in disbelief that a competent villain like him got played like a fiddle.
"Unless you want the real deal and wish to kill me, you might as well follow me!" Aerith ran down the hallways, until she was out of sight. Sephiroth clenched his teeth in anger as he grabbed his Masamune sword and ran in the direction Aerith went, until he found the entrance of the gaming room, blocked by Doc Louis and Little Mac. The one-winged angel approached the entrance of the room, knowing Aerith went inside there, until he was stopped by Doc.
"Sir, I'm going to need a card of identification before you can enter," the boxing trainer held out his hand; Sephiroth looked at Doc's hand for a good while before grabbing the boxing trainer's arm and throwing him on the floor with force. The one-winged angel just threw that fatso Doc Louis like it was nothing...
"Doc Louis!" Little Mac tended to his trainer's needs as Sephiroth entered the gaming room, where Lucina's stand-up comedy gig came to a stop when the one-winged angel was in full focus.
Then the tension in the room soon began to build up, when Cloud stood up to face his arch-enemy. Sephiroth looked to his left, and saw Aerith, who was seated but slowly stood up to stand by Cloud's side when the one-winged angel gazed his eyes at her.
"Of all the days this could have happened, and it happened to be my birthday..." Ryu, the birthday man, facepalmed.
"ROUNDS!" Lloyd Irving excitedly got up just to say this, anticipating a battle between Cloud and Sephiroth. The two swordsmen and everyone else gave Lloyd a silly look, and the young lad slowly sat back down, feeling a bit humiliated. Nice job at interrupting a tense, suspenseful scene Lloyd.
King Dedede: Lloyd, Lloyd, Lloyd...always messing up the best things. He is such a party pooper - the worst kind of party pooper too.
"Cloud Strife, we meet again..." uttered Sephiroth, his glare on Cloud intensifying. "And I see you've been re-united with your one true love, Aerith...tell me Cloud, did you have to sell your soul just to be with her? Aerith told me about the doppelganger that I killed in the altar..."
"There is no doppelganger...you've been hoodwinked this whole time, and you never knew about it," stated Cloud, downplaying the fact that Aerith is technically from another universe - let's hope Lloyd doesn't spill the beans about that. Mario, who was calmly sitting in his seat while the tension built up, motioned to Lucina, letting her continue her stand-up comedy act.
"Well, don't know about you guys, but I got some jokes about unemployed people..." said Lucina, attempting to ease the tension. "I would use them...but none of them work."
"Wait, what?" Sephiroth looked towards Lucina, his ears trying to comprehend what he just heard. "What on earth was that?" Everyone was laughing at Lucina's crappy joke, and that unnerved the one-winged angel for whatever reason.
"And did you guys hear about the pirate that couldn't learn the alphabet?" Lucina grabbed the microphone off the mic stand, feeling and looking more confident now. "Turns out he was always lost at C!" The laughter went up another decibel, and Sephiroth had to cover his ears to avoid this auditory sound. "Also, that lion from The Lion King, I think his name was Simba - remember that scene when he was running through the desert? Someone should have told him to MUFASA!"
The hysterical laughter from the brawlers continued to rise in volume levels, and it was wracking Sephiroth's brain. The laughter was clearly too much for him to handle, he was nearing his breaking point...
Cloud: Cringe and laughter - mix these two together, and you got yourselves the perfect recipe to hinder Sephiroth and bring him down to his knees. Of course, the laughter wouldn't be possible if not for Lucina's audience...Mario had paid each audience member to laugh hysterically at Lucina's jokes, as suggested by Amy. What we would have done if not for that hedgehog...Sonic should be feeling truly grateful.
"Keep on laughing people, I got boatloads of jokes coming your way!" Lucina told the laughing crowd, enjoying herself instead of having some doubt about doing stand-up comedy. "Got some jokes about pizza, but I'd rather not tell them...because they're too cheesy!"
This was it, Sephiroth couldn't take the corny jokes or the laughter anymore. So he did what he had to do - he leaped unto the stage, shocking everyone, and readied his Masamune sword at Lucina, who was now fearing for his life while her father Chrom tried to run onstage to save his one and only daughter from imminent death. However, someone beat him to the punch...
"ARCTHUNDER!" Robin rushed onstage in the blink of an eye, standing in front of Lucina, and cast the spell on Sephiroth, sending the one-winged angel flying out of the gaming room.
"Alright-a Cloud, do your-a thing!" commanded Mario; the blonde swordsman got out his Buster Sword, and ran out of the room to face Sephiroth. The two soldiers soon engaged in a sword battle that continued through the hallway, leaving Lucina alone onstage...with Robin. Uh oh...
"You...saved me," Lucina uttered to Robin, who gave a genuine smile. "You saved from Sephiroth...I don't know how I should thank you..."
"I do believe this will make up for it..." Robin suddenly leaned towards Lucina, his lips puckered. Lucina's eyes grew wider and wider as the mage's face neared hers, and her breathing was increasing. Mario, Peach, Link, Zelda, Aerith, Sonic, Amy, and everyone else in attendance, were watching attentively, anticipating the moment that Robin's lips eventually reaches Lucina's...
"Thank you for saving my daughter!" Chrom popped out of nowhere to face Robin, giving him a slight hug and ruining an absolutely perfect moment. Seeing Robin kiss Lucina would have made everyone's day, but Chrom didn't want to have that, apparently.
"You're welcome...Chrom," responded Robin, feeling awkward and bummed out that his attempt to kiss Lucina was ruined. There's always another time...
"Hey, where on earth did Ryu run off to?" Zelda looked around, seeing that the kung fu fighter had left the gaming room.
"...And that's why we had to kidnap Chun-li and bring her to this mansion," Yoshi had just concluded telling Tifa the story behind Ryu wanting to ask out Chun-li, and this story had some preexisting details that Tifa probably didn't need to know.
"Okay..." was the eco-terrorist's response to the story. "Were the details about Ryu's romantic life really necessary?"
"Not specifically, but it can't hurt to know. Besides, those details pretty much illustrate how slightly pathetic Ryu's personal life is."
Tifa: If I had told you that I was kidnapped by a dinosaur and some mushroom person, and taken to this mansion by Mario's unpopular brother Luigi, you probably wouldn't believe me...but today, that just happened. Strange times...
"Now that you-a know the full-a story, we'll let-a you go," Luigi opened the door to the room, and saw Cloud and Sephiroth, who now continued their battle to the mansion's second floor. Tifa looked through the door in awe, seeing the two swordsmen fighting one another.
"Is that Cloud...fighting with Sephiroth?" she asked out of intrigue, wondering how Sephiroth came back. "Cloud could really use my help!" The strong woman cracked her knuckles, and ran out of the room to lend Cloud a strong assist.
"Do you think Cloud would care that we kidnapped Tifa by accident and brought her here?" Pac-Man asked the others, who either shook their heads or shrugged at his question.
The fight between Cloud and Sephiroth made its way down to the foyer, where Pit, Kirby, and Geno were waiting attentively in the back waiting for Sephiroth to show up. Pit still has the urn in his possession, and he plans to unleash it upon the one-winged angel.
"Sephiroth should be here any second now..." said Pit. "Gotta wait for the right moment to strike..." Soon enough the one-winged angel appeared in the foyer, now fighting not only Cloud, but Tifa as well. Tifa joining in on the fight surely caught Sephiroth off by surprise.
"Funny seeing you of all people here," Cloud said to Tifa as the two heroes fought their enemy.
"You can thank your little friends for bringing me here in the first place," responded Tifa, as she threw a punch at Sephiroth, who dodged the fist. With a strong slash of his Masamune sword, the one-winged angel struck Cloud and Tifa at the same time, sending them flying towards a wall. He then walked towards the two, pointing his sword at them.
"It all ends here, once and for all..." the one-winged angel said. Cloud and Tifa, both down and defenseless - Sephiroth is surely enjoying this moment. "After I'm through with you, Aerith...no...everyone in this wretched mansion will be next..."
"I beg to differ!" said a commanding voice, following by a finger tap on Sephiroth's shoulder. The one-winged angel turned to see how it was...and it was Ryu, and boy was he ticked off. "You seriously think, that you can come in here, and seek vengeance on whomever you are seeking revenge against, cause mayhem everywhere you go, and expect to get away with it? I say NO! No way am I going to let you damper the mood of my birthday, you and no one else, and if you have anything to say about that, I just have one word for you...SHORYUKEN!"
Ryu delivered his world-famous uppercut to Sephiroth, sending him flying up in the air before landing on the floor, near the front door. The one-winged angel slowly got up, clutching his chest and glaring at Ryu.
Tifa: That shoryuken by Ryu...perhaps the most devastating uppercut I've seen with my own eyes. Still in awe at what I had witnessed...
"Get out of our mansion or else!" commanded Ryu, pointing at the front door. Sephiroth grunted and limped towards the front door, as Pit got into position to suck the one-winged angel inside the urn. But before he could, Sephiroth opened the front door...
...and looked up and saw a Gyarados, looking down at him. Sitting atop this Gyarados was Corrin, who was holding Relicanth in his arms. By the looks of it, Bowser fed that Magikarp a plethora of rare candies!
"Relicanth, use Ancient Power on the man before you!" ordered Corrin; Relicanth fired a ball of energy at Sephiroth, who dissipated the ball with the strike of his Masamune sword. A lousy energy ball can't deter this man by any means.
"It'll take more than a mere energy ball to stop me..." snarled the one-winged angel, waiting to see what else Corrin has up his sleeve.
"Gyarados...Hydro Pump." At the order of Corrin, the atrocious Pokemon fired a powerful jet of water at Sephiroth. The one-winged angel tried to fend off this blast with his Masamune sword, but his sword could not handle the blast, as Sephiroth was being pushed back by the water and towards Pit, who opened up the urn in the nick of time. Sephiroth was sucked inside the urn, and once he was inside, Pit closed the lid shut.
"Don't think you haven't seen the last of me, I'll have my revenge sooner than you think!" Sephiroth's voice could be heard from the urn as it shook. Everyone either rolled their eyes or laughed at Sephiroth's vow - no way he can extract revenge when you're stuck inside an urn!
"Good work Gyarados, you really sure help save the day!" Corrin got off of the atrocious Pokemon, and sent him back in a Poke Ball that Falco had given to him. "I hope to use you again sometime in the future..." Corrin walked inside the mansion, and Fox, Falco, Bowser, and Ness, who were all chilling outside, followed Corrin inside. Fox and Falco saw Cloud and Tifa writhing against the wall, and the pilots rushed over to the two to see if they were okay.
"What is up with all the ruckus, there's too much commotion going on!" Master Hand appeared, investigating the scene. He just finished going off on Young Link about his missing urn, and he won't hesitate to go off on those in the foyer.
"Sephiroth infiltrated the mansion and tried to stir up some trouble, but thankfully Corrin and Pit saved the day," explained Fox, as he and Falco helped Tifa up.
"Here's the urn that you kept crying about," Pit handed the urn to Master Hand, who was relieved to see the artifact in one piece. "Might wanna put it in a more secure place, so it won't get lost again. Oh, and ignore the green paint." The angel, Geno and Kirby went away, to tell Wario the good news.
Pit: Now that Master Hand now has his beloved urn back, we have to give Lady Palutena an urn of her own to keep...I wonder if Zero's funky printer still works...
"Isabelle is preparing for me a candlelit bath, so I want the noise level down as much as possible," said Master Hand. Who gives giant hands like Master Hand a bath, and why is Isabelle tasked with preparing this bath in the first place? "Capiche?" Master Hand vanished, returning to his room so he can put poor Isabelle through unnecessary labor. Poor shi tzuh can never seem to catch a break, can she?
"You know Lucina, that blue-haired girl from the wedding?" Cloud asked Tifa. "She's doing some stand-up comedy for some of the brawlers..."
"Lucina, doing stand-up comedy?" grinned Tifa, she couldn't even comprehend the words Cloud is saying. "You have got to be joking..."
"Oh man, this I gotta see!" Falco exclaimed after overhearing what Cloud just said. "Cloud bro, you gotta take us there, this you gotta see to believe! C'mon, Fox, let's go!" Fox shrugged as he, Falco, and Tifa followed Cloud to the gaming room. Ryu was about to head back to the gaming room, until the doorbell rang. The kung fu fighter went to the front door and opened it...and saw Chun-li, all smiles.
"H-Hey Ch-Chun-li, didn't expect to see you this evening," stammered Ryu, doing his best not to sweat although he can't really control how his body operates.
"Hi Ryu," responded Chun-li, who was wearing a blue dress, nearly making Ryu's face turn red. "I was gonna stop by here earlier, but Sephiroth came, and so I chilled at Princess Daisy's place until the coast was clear. Anyways, I just wanna tell you something...happy birthday. Sorry I couldn't get you anything."
"It's okay, Chun-li, that's fine by me..." Ryu cleared his throat with some hesitance, before uttering the following: "...I have something to tell you as well."
Chun-li's eyes grew large - is she dreaming, is this all a dream? Is Ryu about to say what she thinks he's about to say?
"Chun-li...would you like to...go out with me on a date?" asked a nervous Ryu. To his shock and amazement, Chun-li responded by giving him a hug, wrapping her arms around the kung fu fighter's neck.
"Yes, yes, I would absolutely love to!" she exclaimed. "I've been waiting for you to say those words for so long!" Chun-li retracted her arms from Ryu, whose face was red and sweaty, not to mention that he was breathing rather loudly. "Guess I'll be seeing you later!" Chun-li kissed Ryu on the cheek, and closed the front door, departing from the mansion. After the door was closed, Ryu fainted, falling to the floor with a thud; Bowser, Corrin, and Ness, who remained in the foyer this whole time, checked on Ryu to see if he was okay.
"Will it pain Ryu that he never got a birthday gift today?" Corrin asked the others as he rested his hand on Ryu's forehead, searching for any fever.
"Eh, you know what, I think Ryu finally got the birthday gift he truly deserved..." smirked Ness. Is this the best birthday ever for Ryu?
You could make a fine argument it is.