Author's Note:
Got some more guest reviews to answer. First one from an anonymous reader:
"Needs more Ice Climbers."
Yes I thoroughly agree, this story does need more Ice Climbers - it has nearly gotten to the point where I forget that the duo even existed. Fortunately I've included them in this installment. One more anonymous reader review to answer:
"Prank war, please!"
Oh yeah...that's DEFINITELY gonna be in the next chapter or so. I've been brainstorming ideas already. Now we have Cute 123, who has a very interesting suggestion:
"Have meta knight lose his mask and walk around with Kirby and not even samus can resist"
Honestly I'm on the fence with that one, can't imagine Meta Knight without his mask, ever. That's like trying to picture Donald Trump without his goofy blonde hair. Finally we have Philippe:
"Sonic SHOULD get a pet Shaymin. And Bowser definitely deserves that beating. DEFINETLEY."
First things off, Bowser absolutely deserved that beating, and I happened to enjoy that beating...very, very much. As for Sonic getting a pet Shaymin, that may very well happen sometime in the future.
Episode 41: Luchador
As a bit of a suggestion by Master Hand in order to keep up with a ridiculously high wedding budget, Mario went job searching, so he could make some money to cover for the budget before wedding time arrives.
Except that Mario isn't looking for a job for himself - he's looking for a job for someone else.
While the plumber continues working with Pac-Man on the road towards the wedding, a certain brawler will be working away from the mansion, making as much dough as possible that can be contributed to the budget. And no, we're not talking about cookie dough, you can't make money off of cookie dough if you don't bake it. Most baking businesses learn that the hard way.
In order to decide who would be getting a job, Mario had to narrow down a list of qualified brawlers. Samus? She already worked for the Galactic Federation, and she may not be planning to work anywhere else. Sonic? He may be old enough to work a job, but he can prove to be quite the annoyance in the workplace, just as much as he is in the mansion. Link? Other than swinging his sword left and right and wielding his shield like a scaredy cat, what else can the Hylian do?
Before Mario could settle down on what brawler should be working, race car driver Jacky Bryant approached the plumber in the middle of the hallway, as he was going over his list of brawlers. Jacky a good-spirited fellow, he would do anything to help a fellow man out.
Jacky: Witnessing Mario and Peach getting married is a lot like man landing on the moon - it's a truly unique once-in-a-lifetime experience, that you'll never get to see if you're not there, you can only talk about it as time goes on. I'm here to ensure the wedding doesn't get annulled by the wedding budget, I'll fight for Mario's (and Peach's) right!
"I'm assuming you have yet to decide who's getting a job," Jacky grinned. He would have to do a lot of grinning and posturing if he wants to win over Mario.
"My final two choices-a are Yoshi and Lloyd Irving," stated Mario. What employer in their right mind would want to hire either one of those two bums? "Yoshi needs-a to get out of-a the mansion so he can do-a other productive things aside-a from writing crappy fan-a fic stories, and Lloyd-a needs to get out-a of the mansion...for several-a obvious reasons. Perhaps you can-a be the deal-a breaker, Jacky?"
"Alright then, here's a deal-breaker for ya...why won't I get a job, or better yet, a managerial position?" This offer greatly pleased Mario, who obviously never had taken a manger position into any consideration. "I spoke with a car salesman downtown and I told him your situation, and he said that he can give me a job title of a manager at his car dealership! How great does that sound?"
"That sounds-a absolutely splendid!...But how long will-a you be working at this car-a dealership, what would your work-a schedule be?"
"I'm free to work all week long, save for Sundays, that's when the dealership is closed. The salary is up to fifty dollars per hour, and that would be enough to cover for the budget." $50 per hour?! That should be more than enough! "Only one problem though - I don't have a credible resume!" No point in getting hired if you don't have a resume to show for it.
"Good thing I know a thing-a or two about preparing resumes, had to make-a one in order to get into the plumbing-a business!" Honest question - why did Mario give up plumbing full-time? Has saving Princess Peach from the clutches of evil become some sort of job for him? How does he even expect to get paid for his heroic efforts?! "I can-a show you the ropes of how-a to make the perfect resume, without a fee!"
So Jacky followed Mario to wherever the plumber will guide the racer to making a resume - likely the computer room. Mario's faithful wedding assistant, Pac-Man, ran up to the plumber in the hallway, having come across a crucial step in the wedding planning process.
"Mario we need to find an officiant real quick!" Pac-Man alerted Mario, running him to him. There can't be no formal wedding without an officiant; Chrom could be a wedding officiant again, but he already did his time, why not let another person run things? "We don't have much time, we oughta find one before it's too late!"
"Let-a Aerith take care of-a it, I'm-a busy," Mario said to his wedding assistant as he and Jacky continued on their way. Pac-Man just stood there in the middle of the hallway, looking back at Mario and wondering if he was actually putting whatever he's doing with Jacky over his own wedding. He can't expect Aerith to do everything for him; granted she's a genuinely nice person, but nice people can't do every little thing you would expect from them.
Pac-Man: Asked Chrom if he wanted to officiate another wedding...and just as I expected, he said no. Outside of Chrom, there are hardly any viable options for an officiant - I could ask Snake, but he's obviously in a lot of legal trouble. Not to mention that his accelerated age would make him forget Mario's and Peach's name. He might call Peach "Blondie" and Mario "The Mustached Man from Wonderland" or something zany like that.
"Bro are you kidding me, Mega Manectric has NOTHING on Mega Tyranitar, only good thing about Manectric is that it's a speedy Pokemon!" Sonic engaged in a Pokemon conversation with Red the Pokemon Trainer, both men returning from a fishing excursion. They were holding a debate about which mega Pokemon is the best. "Even Alolan Sandslash could wipe the floor with him!"
"Oh please, we won't even know how strong Alolan Sandslash might be until the new Pokemon games come out!" retorted Red. "For all we know, Alolan Exeggutor might be better, could even be OP!"
"Heh, Exeggutor was never even OP to begin with..." Well, Blue had the coconut Pokemon in his party in the Pokemon original games/remakes, and cruised to the Pokemon League with this grass/psychic type whiz...so he may be OP to a certain extent.
Sonic and Red arrived at Sonic's room, and when Sonic opened his door and entered his room, the hedgehog was flabbergasted. No, not because of the pile of unwanted clothes on his bed - Peach always forces Sonic to fold them since she feels that he's "not doing much that is productive". Rather, Sonic was flabbergasted by the fact that his friend Tails had a Vulpix on his desk, as the yellow fox was inspecting the fox Pokemon.
"You stinking hypocrite!" Sonic accusingly pointed at Tails, grabbing the fox's attention. "Last week you were against me having a Pokemon in the room, and now you brought one in the room?! But when I do it, suddenly it's a huge problem!"
"I was never against you having Charmander in the room, I just didn't want you two to disturb me in my sleep..." clarified Tails; Sonic still thinks of him as a weirdo for going to bed early on Fridays. "I brought this Vulpix to my desk so I can study it and take notes and stuff until the Alolan Vulpix arrives." The Alolan Vulpix, along with the other native Pokemon of Alola, are set to be brought to the Smash Mansion in November (the time Pokemon Sun and Moon will be released!) and assimilate in the Pokemon sanctuary.
"Why are you studying the Vulpix so early, can't you just wait?" asked Red. "Wait until the Alolan Vulpix, and then you can compare both Vulpxies and differentiate between the both of them." Tails doesn't believe in doing that, he likes to think ahead.
"Even though I hardly know much about the Alolan Vulpix, we all know it's gonna be better than the original Vulpix, just look at how cool it is!" This remark certainly didn't hurt Vulpix's confidence at all...
Red: Something I have noticed about Sonic...he judges Pokemon and their abilities based upon how "cool" and "awesome" they look. For instance, he thinks Gyarados sucks, and that Luvdisc is better since "it at least knows how to be pretty". So I guess that once Sonic takes a look at Probopass, he'll immediately declare it the worst rock-type Pokemon that has ever existed?
"Sonic, just because the Alolan Vulpix looks 'cooler' to you, may not necessarily mean that it's better," Tails had to say to his best friend. "That's like me saying that Paula Adbul was the best judge on American Idol at the time since she's the best-looking."
"She was the best judge on the panel, if I do say so myself," stated Sonic. Many others consider Simon Cowell, but to each their own.
"What I'm trying to say is, you can't judge Pokemon, people, sports teams, and the like by their appearance, you should never judge a book by its cover." This whole "never judge a book by its cover" mantra is a valuable lesson for anyone to learn, but Sonic ain't learning jack today.
"Yeah, yeah, that's just a politically correct method of viewing everyone the same, it never works out perfectly though. C'mon Red, let's go throw Poke Balls at unsuspecting people passing by the mansion!" Must be an idea Sonic may have gained from pranking with Bowser back in episode 38.
"But Master Hand will have our heads if we..." Red tried to talk Sonic out of this whole Poke Ball throwing activity, but the hedgehog just ignored the Pokemon trainer, grabbing his hand and walking out of the room. Tails shook his head at Sonic, then went back to studying the Vulpix in front of him.
Bayonetta stood in front of a mirror in the practically unused mirror room, examining her wonderful physique. Her physique has gained her a lot of unwanted onlookers from the male brawlers, mainly from those who are single, and will likely remain that way forever until the end of time (no offense, Captain Falcon). Too bad Bayonetta already has a boyfriend in Luka Redgrave...
"Bought these flowers just for you, hope you like them." And would you know it, Luka appeared, entering the room and handing the flowers to Bayonetta, expressing joy when accepting the flowers. "Stopped by to pay a visit - delivering flyers for Rodin has been cutting deep into my schedule." This is one of the few days Rodin - a weapons dealer who specializes in hunting demons - will give Luka a day off from his errands, and Luka has used his day off to pay his girlfriend a visit - that's what you call being a wonderful boyfriend.
Luka: Rodin has been more urgent with the flyers...he suspects a huge demon outburst on the horizon, and wants me to deliver as many flyers as possible to spread the word about what may be an incoming swarm of demon activity. If I know better, this is just a lousy attempt by Rodin to make my work to the fullest in flyer delivery, he used a similar tactic before where he threatened to kill Bayonetta if I didn't deliver a certain amount of flyers on one day...
"Spending the money you gain from Rodin on flowers...you bad little boy," Bayonetta teased with Luka, who responded with a smirk. Rodin pays Luka for delivering flyers, and apparently Rodin doesn't what Luka to be spending his salary...unless it has anything to do with flyers, presumably.
"Rodin is frankly against me spending 'his' money on things not pertaining to demons and such, but as he should know, a man has to eat every now and then," said Luka. "Can't deliver flyers forever, gotta take care of my body and everything going on in my life." Does Rodin not think and meditate upon these things, or is he obsessed with flyers like how Kirby is obsessed with food? (Food is a highly broad term in this regard.)
"I honestly don't think Luka would be a great officiant, he looks too rough to me to be one," Aerith discussed with Cloud, the two lovebirds standing afar from Luka and Bayonetta. As you know now, Aerith is tasked with finding an officiant for Mario's and Peach's wedding, since Mario is off doing things with Jacky. "You sure we can't get Chrom to officiate another wedding?"
"Pac-Man already asked Chrom, and he said no," replied Cloud. "Apparently Luka is the only choice we have, there's hardly anyone else qualified to take the job." Waluigi could be an officiant...though it wouldn't be worth having the guests boycott the wedding because Waluigi's ugly.
"Fine then, guess I'll go ask then..." Aerith walked up to Luka; the journalist/escape artist turned around and saw the flower girl, remembering her from Luigi's wedding. Like many others, he's still in amazement as to how Aerith came back from the dead (although she never did, if you paid attention to Marth's talking head segment in episode 24).
"I take it that you're Aerith Gainsborough, the mistress of Cloud Strife?" Luka would ask Aerith, just to make sure it was her. He's still in disbelief as to how she's even alive. "Very nice to see you, I suppose, although we hardly speak with one another or even know each other well."
"Oh, the feeling's mutual," smiled Aertih. "Not sure if Bayonetta told you this, but Mario and Peach are going to be married sometime in June next year, and I was wondering if you would be the officiant..."
"Thanks, but no thanks - Rodin has me on a leash, and he won't allow me any breaks whatsoever. This is one of the few days off I get from sending out flyers, and I have to use it to the fullest." Might as well go with Waluigi for the officiant - expect no one to be in attendance when he's carrying out the wedding proceedings.
Cloud: This is yet another fine example of vintage Mario - while that walking piece of flab is off doing whatever, someone else is doing the job for him, more likely than not struggling to complete thee task unwillingly handed to them. Today Aerith is the latest unfortunate victim, and I'm afraid that I'm next in line...
"If the opportunity rises, I'll be the officiant, but I'll consider the offer from here on out," Luka continued. "Who knows, Rodin might even give me a summer break from the flyers, I truly deserve one..."
"Well then why don't you act like a grown man and just ask for one?" questioned Bayonetta, refusing to see her boyfriend this submissive. "Rodin is technically your boss, and you're his employee, is that correct? Rodin should be doing whatever's best for his employee, or employees if he even has anyone else delivering flyers, and grant their every wish. He can't let his personal matters overrule your well-being!"
"Why don't we go ask Rodin ourselves and negotiate with him?" suggested Cloud. Not the brightest idea - Rodin is one bad dude, what with the sunglasses, cigar, facial deposition, and everything else that would make a tough guy, well, a tough guy. Oh, and he's also an immortal demon. "He has to give some leeway, he can't be that tough of a guy."
"Speaking with Rodin is like a death wish just waiting to happen..." Bayonetta pondered over Cloud's suggestion, before a smile formed on her face. That could either be a good thing...or a bad thing. "But with me around, I can get inside Rodin's...'soft' side." Rodin has a soft side? Guess he's not that tough after all. "Rodin lives in Paradiso, the Dimension of the Angels...that's the word on the street though. Isn't that where he lives, my dear Luka?"
"Rodin recently moved his weapons shop to Paradiso, so yes, he lives in that dimension," confirmed Luka. "Let's go pay him a quick visit."
"Link, can you please come with me to the dancing room?" Zelda asked Link, in a state of distress and worry. The princess and her prince were in the library, and Link was embroiled in a highly contested chess match with Meta Knight. Gil, Yoshi, and Villager were all spectators.
"Yeah Zelda I'll be coming in a minute, just gotta finish this chess match first," responded Link; this is the fifth time the Hylian repeated this. He and Meta Knight were locked in a stalemate, but not the kind of stalemate that would effectively end the game for good.
Meta Knight: Whenever I play a chess match with anyone, something is always on the line, every match to me is meaningful. I put many things on the line - dignity, la dignidad. Honor, la honra. Respect, el respecto. Passion, la pasion. Link, my competitor...he lacks those things. Don't believe me, you should spend more time capturing the moments Zelda bosses him around. Zelda being a few years older than him is no good excuse for his thick-skinned ways.
"Meta Knight's got this one in the bag, he whooped Ganondorf's behind yesterday, and he'll whoop Link's eventually," said Villager. He obviously has high hopes for the Star Warrior.
"Nah man, Link is gonna pull off an upset, he'll leave Meta Knight in shock," said Gil. A hard task to accomplish, nobody has ever come close to beating Meta Knight in a fair game of chess. Except Kirby, poor puffball was crying because he was about to lose, and Meta Knight had to throw away the match just to appease his "friend".
"I'm not going for either person to win, I came here to see a great chess match, nothing more, nothing less!" said Yoshi. How boring is it not picking anyone to win, what's the fun in that?
"Well can you please hurry up your chess match Link, I want you to see something before it's too late!" frowned Zelda. The princess' wish would be granted, when Meta Knight put Link in checkmate. "Good, you finally lost your stupid chess match, NOW will you come with me?!"
"Whatever can keep you from complaining," replied Link as he got up and followed Zelda out of the library. Meta Knight watched the Hylian attentively, wanting to do the hero of Hyrule a huge solid - but for what reason, and why?
While Knuckles was putting on the finishing touches of his first music video in the recording studio, Fox and Falco spent some time with the other brawlers, namely Rosalina and Luma (technically Luma isn't a brawler, but she can land a couple of moves so she counts). The mother of all Lumas was showing the Star Fox pilots her new blender; good chance Ganondorf bought it for her.
"All you do is put a bunch of stuff inside the blender, and then you press this button," demonstrated Rosalina, pouring an assortment of fruits in the blender and pressing the button, explaining as if Fox nor Falco don't know how to use a blender correctly. Regardless, both pilots took this lesson to heart, nodding and stroking their chins as Rosalina went along. "And viola!" Once the blending was done, Rosalina poured the concoction into two glasses and gave said glasses to Fox and Falco each; the pilots drank the concoction heartily, before having to give their critique.
"Mmhmm, mmhmm, not bad at all!" Falco offered his opinion. "Tastes great, just as I figured!" Not the type of reaction Rosalina wanted, but she'll take whatever she can get.
Rosalina: Ganondorf had bought that blender for me on Monday, as a "belated" birthday gift of sorts; apparently he doesn't know when my birthday is. He told me sternly not to tell the others how I got the blender, for he doesn't want anyone to know he has a "soft side"...
Fox: Falco and I, we're already established music moguls, in spite of our relatively short time dabbing in music production. So then we thought, why not venture in other things?
Falco: That's where Rosalina and her new blender comes in! We're gonna create the best smoothie ever, and then we'll become smoothie experts! We can be the Mike and Ike of the drinking realm!
Fox: If our smoothie becomes a hit, we'll make more smoothies and sell them to the masses. But unlike Mike and Ike, we won't be "breaking up" just to sway the young folks...
"Do you mind if we use your blender to make some wicked smoothies?" Fox asked Rosalina, ambitious to make some delectable beverages. The fox was rubbing his hands together like Montgomery Burns, making it difficult for Rosalina to say no.
"Be my guest, make as many smoothies as you want!" the mother of Lumas smiled; Fox and Falco immediately raided the kitchen of items they would need to make smoothies - fruits, sweets, you name it. The Ice Climbers walked into the kitchen, and saw what the Star Fox pilots were up to.
"Rosalina, what are those two bozos trying to do?" a somewhat concerned Popo asked Rosalina. Nana looked on nervously; she wanted to stop her friend/brother/presumed boyfriend, but that would make things ugly. "Why are they gathering ingredients?"
"They're about to make smoothies!" Luma answered for her mama. Popo's fears were suddenly realized, as he stomped his foot on the floor in disgust.
"Only we Ice Climbers can make treats around here!" In case you couldn't tell already, Popo takes a heavy pride in the sundaes he and Nana make. "Fox, Falco, you bums dare try to kill our momentum?!"
"Watcha gonna do about it punk, you wanna challenge us or something?" asked Fox, infuriating Popo even more - just exactly what Nana needed. "How about this, we have a food-off - we make smoothies, and you make your crummy sundaes. And Rosalina will be the judge, and determine which is better - our smoothies, or your sundaes! Deal?"
"Um, I don't know if this is totally worth it..." said Rosalina, against this whole food-off competition, as well as the idea of her being a judge. "How about we put aside our differences and come to a..."
"Deal!" Popo confidently shook Fox's hand, now signifying what may be a long, hard fought competition. A competition that Nana, Rosalina, not even Luma asked for nor wanted to transpire.
Meta Knight: Correct me if I'm wrong, but is Link supposed to be the so-called "hero of Hyrule"? So why does he insist on letting Zelda boss him around, and taking him to unknown places and predicaments? I understand that Zelda is the princess of her land and Link has to do her bidding, but for goodness sake, the man is deemed a pimp by the folks on Urban Dictionary!...And yes, I do believe in everything the Urban Dictionary says, it's the same website that confirmed me as the most broken character in Smash and called me the king of the internet, so the folks running the site obviously know what's up!
"Zelda why are you taking me to the dancing room, nothing exciting happens here," Link said as Zelda led him inside the room in question. "This is a stupid waste of my time and WHERE THE HECK DID THAT WRESTLING RING COME FROM?!" The Hylian would stop in his tracks when he saw a wrestling ring in the center of the dancing room, with Pit and Donkey Kong wrestling one another in said ring, with Toad serving as the referee, evidenced by his striped shirt. Little Mac, Doc Louis, Akira Yuki, Ryu, Heihachi Mishima, Diddy Kong, and Viridi (standing on the ring apron) were spectating the match.
"C'mon Pit, my man, sweep the leg!" Doc Louis called out to the angel. You've probably heard this term "sweep the leg" at many fighting events - why is this such an effective method?
"Pummel Pit to the ground Donkey Kong, he's got nothing on you!" Little Mac called out to Donkey Kong. In a perfect world, the gorilla could completely massacre Pit in a standardized wrestling match, but he's having a tough time with the angel.
"Put him in a headlock, DK!" Diddy cheered on for his uncle. He knows what Donkey Kong is capable of, given his experience in Punch Out!
"Somebody throw a karate chop already!" said Akira. He's at the wrong place to be expecting karate chops of any sort...
"Use the ropes to your advantage, the ropes will give you leverage!" advised Ryu. Pit nor Donkey Kong used the ropes; they were in the center of the ring, putting one another in a headlock.
"Watashi wa mushiro kōshaku sore o korera ni yakedo o miru yori mo, jissai no resurā to no jissai no resuringu no shiai o mitaidesu!" said Heihachi. No one bothered to pay attention to him, partly because they didn't understand a single word he was saying.
Palutena: Pit had constantly implored me about getting him a wrestling ring, so I gave in and had Wario buy him a ring and placed it in the dressing room, for we had nowhere else to put it. You should have seen the joy on Pit's face, he hugged me and ran about the mansion like a crazed maniac, like a kid going on a sugar craze...now that I mention it, I saw several packets of sugar concealed under Pit's bed. No wonder the apple strudel I baked the other day wasn't that sweet...
To no one surprise but maybe Viridi's, Donkey Kong won his match with Pit, as he powerslammed the poor angel and pinned him. Not exactly how Pit envisioned his first wrestling match to go out.
"One...two...three!" Toad did the pin count, hitting the mat with his small hand three times. "Ring the bell!" Mr. Game and Watch, the man running the bell, rang the bell, signifying the end of the match. Donkey Kong held his hands above his head and shook them, celebrating his victory, as Toad offered to help up Pit. "You did really great for a first try Pit. Now do us all a favor...and take off that ugly spandex." The spandex in question was an eclectic mix of yellow and black, and it's not very pleasing to the eyes.
"Thanks man, I'll do my best next time around," Pit thanked Toad (he might still be a drug lord until proven innocent) as he trudged over to a corner of the ring, where Viridi was, holding a water bottle in her hands. Even though her boyfriend lost, the goddess of nature is still supportive of Pit, for that's what great girlfriends do.
"You did a great job out there," Viridi said to Pit, patting the angel on the back, uttering a politically correct response that most supportive girlfriends would use. "In your next match, you'll do great and get a win!"
"I know I will, Lucario has been a great wrestling coach for me," responded Pit. He seriously asked Lucario for wrestling training?! Would a Machamp be a better choice for a Pokemon wrestling trainer, since he actually looks like a wrestler?
Lucario: Apparently I'm Pit's so-called wrestling trainer - the only qualifications is that you have to have some fighting skill, and you must have the ability to speak English, and unfortunately I met those qualifications. Our training has been up and down; Pit has proven he's able to apply holds and grapples correctly, but as for selling wrestling moves...he's a work and progress. The only other positive with our training is that Pit finally learned that wrestling is relatively fake. Wonder how many hardcore wrestling fans I triggered by saying that...
"Just wanted you to see the wrestling ring, I'm still in disbelief Palutena gave in to Pit and bought it for him," Zelda said to Link, shaking her head. "I'll be right back, gonna go make sure Peach didn't blow up the laundry room again. Told her that laundry detergent was from Nightmare Enterprises..." Nightmare sells laundry detergent now? Zelda left the dancing room, leaving her boyfriend Link behind. The hero of Hyrule turned around, and jumped in the air in fright when he saw Meta Knight, standing there like a ghost. Cue the sound of a Mexican guitar playing, if you wish.
"Tell me, Link, were you about to follow Zelda to the laundry room, where Peach washes our clothes?" the Star Warrior asked Link, who was struggling to come up with an answer. "Give me an answer right away!"
"...yes, I was going to follow Zelda," Link sighed, admitting defeat. But he still has time to save face. "...but I was going to follow her for a certain reason, you see, Zelda and I, we were...uh...uh..." So much for saving face.
"See, Link, that's your problem - you're too submissive. Not that it's a bad thing, but you're the hero of Hyrule, you should a leader, not a follower! And that's where I come in...I'm going to toughen you up, by making you a luchador, a wrestler! So how about you put away your sword once and a while, and fight like a man, with your hands, rather than some lousy blade?"
Link instantly shook his head at Meta Knight's offer. The Hylian has proven several times in Smash Life that he can't fend himself without his Master Sword, and whenever push comes to shove, he must use his sword at all costs. His best friend Cloud even wishes Link wasn't so dependent on his sword.
"Your mind may be telling me no, but your heart says yes!" interpreted Meta Knight, like he's a mind reader or something. Could explain why he was so broken in Brawl... "We shall begin training right away, and make you the toughest Hylian who has ever lived!"
"Not so fast, my mask-wearing friend!" Just then, the Flying Man, seemingly swooping out of nowhere, flew and landed next to Meta Knight like magic, catching the Star Warrior and Link off by surprise. "Two heads are better than one, and that's where I come in! Link, I shall make you the tough guy you're meant to be, for I am your courage!"
Link just stared and blinked at Meta Knight and the Flying Man - who held a green luchador mask out to Link. What did the Hylian do to deserve this?
"This Paradiso place looks...awfully nice, great place for sightseeing and whatnot," Mega Man remarked as he, Cloud, Aerith, Bayonetta, Luka, and R.O.B. traversed through the Dimension of the Angels; he and R.O.B. were responsible for transporting Cloud and company to Paradiso, and they had to tag along.
Mega Man: When Luka mentioned that Paradiso is the Dimension of the Angels, I was thinking of a place where actual angels, you know, with wings and halos over their heads...not strange-looking creatures that look like they can mutilate you in a matter of minutes. Good thing I already charged up my Charge Shot, in the event one of these "angels" tries to attack me.
"Amazing to see what wonderful sights exist when you get out of the mansion more often," smirked Bayonetta. The Umbra Witch has encouraged her fellow brawlers to do the same thing and get out every once and a while, but many choose not to do so due to Master Hand.
"Rodin's shop should be up ahead," stated Luka, keeping himself on guard. "The sooner we find Rodin and speak with him, the quicker we can leave this dimension before anything happens to us."
"Is that Rodin up ahead?" Aerith pointed at a dark-skinned man with sunglasses, a cigar in his mouth, a long coat, and gold chains around his neck. Indeed, it was Rodin, and he was speaking with a man wearing glasses, a purple coat, and a white hat. This man is Enzo, and he likes himself some money.
"How many times do I gotta tell you man, I'm not buying your stupid kids Christmas gifts this year!" Rodin said to Enzo, who is apparently enticing the weaponsmith to help him out in Christmas shopping. An act of desperation by most parents. "That's all you, I'm supposed to be looking out for my own self!"
"But Rodin, I practically came all the way here just to ask you this, I won't let my visit go in vain!" responded Enzo, now on the brink of utter desperation. Cloud and company were able to discern Enzo's pronounced Brooklyn accent from afar. "It's not my fault I spend my money on useless things, it's a lesson I'm still trying to learn to this very day..."
"Let's get this out of the way..." Cloud, refusing to take any more of Rodin's and Enzo's bickering, grabbed Luka's hand and walked up to Rodin. "Hey dude, you're Rodin, right, the guy who sells weapons? Name's Cloud Strife; your man Luka has a little request to ask of you."
"Luka is supposed to be on his day off, he's not supposed to even be here!" frowned Rodin. He looked behind Cloud and Luka, and saw Bayonetta and the others. Bayonetta smiled and waved at Rodin, winking at him. "Okay, what's going on, why did you bring that witch and the rest of those folks here?"
"We just want to know if you can allow me to take a day off, sometime in June," explained Luka. "Don't know if I already told you this, Bayonetta relayed this information to me some time ago - Mario and Peach are getting married, and I've been selected to be a candidate for officiating their wedding. I want you to have the final say regarding this matter." Before Rodin could say anything, Cloud's cellphone rang; the swordsman read the caller ID, and saw that it was Little Mac. Why is the boxer calling him? And why does Cloud even have Little Mac's contact information to begin with?
"Hello Little Mac, something wrong?" Cloud answered his cellphone. "Uh huh...uh huh...hold up, Link is going to die?!...Oh I see...I'll hurry back to the mansion ASAP, I'll be there sooner than you know it...alright then, see you later." Cloud ended his phone call, before returning his attention to Rodin. "Hurry up and make your decision, my bud Link might be in grave danger soon..."
Cloud: Little Mac informed me that Meta Knight and the Flying Man are training Link to be a "luchador" - they're having him wear an actual luchador mask, tights, and everything. Any sort of fighting involving Link that requires no sword is always bad trouble, and I don't think Zelda would be willing to bail Link out.
"I'm sure whatever danger your friend is in, it's not that big of a deal," remarked Rodin. Obviously he has never seen Link's capability, or the lack thereof, without his Master Sword. "He can live through whatever ordeal he's going through."
"You don't understand, my friend Link, he can't use his fists ever in a fight, and someone's trying to teach him how to be a luchador wrestler," stated Cloud. "Quite frankly I'm afraid it won't end very well for him." Enzo, overhearing the entire conversation, grinned somewhat evilly to himself, as his grin grew to a Cheshire Cat grin...
"Rodin, can you come over here for a quick minute?" Enzo asked of the weaponsmith, who came over to speak with the undertaker. Cloud felt weary and suspicious as he watched Enzo whisper some things into Rodin's ear, the weaponsmith nodding his head. After Enzo was done, Rodin returned to Cloud and Luka.
"I've made up my mind...I'll let Luka have his little day off in June, on the day the wedding takes place," stated Rodin; Luka silently pumped his fist in the air. "But only on one condition..." More probable than not that Enzo has greatly influenced Rodin's decisions, and whatever stipulations make come along with it.
"Ready to get started-a on your resume?" Mario asked Jacky in the computer room, the computer Jacky is using having Microsoft Word open. No love for Notepad++?
"I was born ready, let's get to it!" exclaimed Jacky, rubbing his hands together. He pulled up the keyboard, and clicked the cursor at the top of the page...and after that, the racer didn't know what to do. Good thing he has Mario at his side. "...so where do I begin?"
"Type your-a name in the center of-a the document." Jacky centered the page and typed his full name, Jacky Bryant. "Now type your address-a under your name." Not wanting to make things difficult, Jacky pressed enter and typed the Smash Mansion's address. "Now type 'Career Objective' in large, bold-a letters." Jacky did as he was told. "So what-a is your career objective?"
"To raise money that can be contributed to the budget of your wedding?" asked Jacky, prompting Mario to facepalm. No way Jacky can expect to get hired with a career objective like that, it would exploit the point of him even getting a job.
Mario: I'll-a be honest with-a you, I've never prepared a single-a resume in my entire life, when I said-a I prepared a resume for the plumbing-a business, I made-a it up... *holds up a copy of a resume template* ...i'll just-a go off of this template to assist-a Jacky.
"Say that your career-a objective is to display your knowledge-a of automobiles with customers," suggested Mario, and Jacky typed just that. "Type 'Professional Experience' the same-a way you typed 'Career Objective'." Jacky pressed enter twice and typed "Professional Experience", applying the same format that "Career Objective" has. "Do you even-a have any professional experience?"
"Would Indy Car racing qualify as professional experience?" asked Jacky. Mario shrugged; Jacky decided to go along with Indy Car racing. It's better to have something than nothing, as some elderly guy sitting on a bench in a park giving advice to some stranger sitting next to him would probably say.
"Next-a up is 'Education'," Mario continued; Jacky would press enter twice once more and type this in large bold lettering. "Do you have-a any education?"
"Can't say I don't, never even been to college!" Jacky typed "n/a" under "Education", as Mario rested his chin on the palm of his hand, wondering how Jacky will ever get a job now.
Jacky: I don't see what's the deal with not having an education, you don't need one in order to be successful. Just look at Howie Mandel, dude got suspended from high school and never attended college, and look at him now! He turned his adolescent upbringing into a joke - and then into a career!
"Last up-a is 'Additional Skills'," said Mario, as Jacky typed this in the usual big told lettering format, it was getting tedious for the racer to change between text formats. "List as many additional-a skills as you can!"
"Alright, what additional skills do I have..." Jacky flexed his fingers before typing the following: "Affluent in Japanese...great computer skills...awesome communicator..." So far so good... "Ladies man...great sense of humor...a super awesome guy..." ...and now it seems like Jacky is effectively killing his chances of getting a job. What use would being a ladies man be while you're working at a car dealership? "Okay, I think we're done!"
"Excellent! Make sure you proof-a read everything before we print-a out your resume - no mistakes equals a good-a first impression!" This coming from a man who admitted to fibbing about making a resume...
"Keep it up Link, you're doing great so far!" the Flying Man commended the Hylian - wearing a green luchador mask and green pants, as he repeatedly struck two punching mitts held by the Flying Man in the wrestling ring. "That's the spirit, don't give up, don't back down!" His striking is all a part of strong style, a Japanese wrestling style that involves a heavy amount of striking and kicking. Despite this style's ethnic backgrounds, Meta Knight wanted Link to learn every wrestling style there is.
"You're coming along very well Link, far more than I would have ever imagined..." the Star Warrior in question said as he stood at ringside watching over Link's progress. "Soon you'll be the toughest son of a gun to have lived in Hyrule." That would only apply to Link if he ever used a gun to begin with.
"Training to become a wrestler, huh, looks like you waited too late..." Pit appeared, his arms folded. Standing next to Pit was his so-called wrestling trainer Lucario, who was sporting a facial expression that literally screamed "Save me..."
"Just because you wrestled with Donkey Kong in this ring and somehow survived the match doesn't make you the grandest brawler of all existence, Pit," Link said to the angel, giving him an ego check, as he continued to train. "If you wanna be all cocky, then be that way with Viridi, she tolerates your stupidity which means she'll tolerate just about anything from you."
Doc Louis: Really hate to say this, but that man Link is gonna die in that ring! Should he fight against a measly opponent he might have a chance, but against someone like Heihachi or Donkey Kong? We might as well plan the dude's funeral while the match goes on! I still can't believe Pit survived his match with Donkey Kong, he must be living on borrowed time or something.
"Yeah, sure, we all know you're gonna lose whoever you go up against, that's for sure," snorted Pit. Did the angel receive a concussion in his match against Donkey Kong, does he not know that he lost his first-ever match? "Ain't that right Lucario?"
"Link may lose, but he'll arguably put up a better fight than you did in your wrestling debut," replied Lucario, earning a backhand slap at the hands of Pit. "Ow, what was that for, I was just stating my two cents!"
"That's for dressing me down in front of a future competitor!" Link vs Pit - who ya got? "Follow me, we have some more training to do!" Pit exited the dancing room; Lucario groaned and followed the angel. The aura Pokemon should be doing his daily meditating and yoga practice, not teaching some lad like Pit how to tango in the wrestling ring.
"Ignore Pit, he's become more cocky than he should," Meta Knight told Link. "He's becoming Dark Pit 2.0, and we can't afford to have two Dark Pits in our mansion, one is already enough."
Leaned against the wall flanking the entrance to the dancing room was a certain ninja - a ninja by the name of Sheik. She had heard everything - Link's aggressive strikes, Meta Knight commending Link's effort, Pit's boasting, and even the backhand slap Pit delivered to Lucario. Why on earth is she eavesdropping for?
In the kitchen, the competition between the Star Fox pilots and the Ice Climbers raged on, with Fox and Falco making their smoothies, and Nana (against her will) and Popo making their beloved smoothies. And the arbitrator, Rosalina, watched with Luma as the madness persisted.
"Adding chocolate to your overrated sundaes?" scoffed Fox. "How about we add CARAMEL!" The fox poured caramel into a preexisting concoction inside the blender, and pressed the button on said blender like a madman.
"You dare add celery to your smoothies?" scoffed Popo. "Why don't you try some carrots for a change!" The Ice Climber sliced a few carrots into one of the sundaes, making for a very interesting combination.
While this went on, Rosalina and Luma wearily watched the competition take its turns and occasional speed bumps, if any. Sucks for Rosalina, she's gonna have to be a judge...
Sonic: Yup, Red and I, we're chilling up here, at the top of the mansion, where I attempted to commit suicide, but that's all in the past, that I'm sure...
Red: Sonic can we stop throwing these Poke Balls at random people, we're wasting precious Poke Balls, and don't you think you'll indict us in some form of restraining order?
Sonic: Hold up, is that the mailman guy that runs in funny tights and delivers the mail to Link? *grabs a Poke Ball and throws it at the Postman's head, seemingly knocking him out* Aw yeah, bullseye, ten points!
Red: *whimpering* I wanna go home...
Sonic: Red you silly goose, we're already home! What, you think Master Hand is gonna pop out of nowhere and...
"Sonic I have a major situation on my hands!" a voice called out; Sonic, thinking it was Master Hand, shrieked and jumped in the arms of Red...only to find Tails flying towards him. "While I was studying Vulpix, I had went to go take a bathroom break, and when I returned to the room...Vulpix wasn't there! Either she went missing, or someone kidnapped her! I fully suspect Bowser to be behind the kidnapping, if it happened..."
"...and why are you telling me this for?" questioned Sonic. "That's your problem buddy, not mine." You'd think the hedgehog would be willing to help out Tails in tracking Vulpix, but Sonic wants nothing to do with the fox Pokemon - after all, Tails was watching over Vulpix, and that's his responsibility to keep up with the Pokemon.
"What if the Vulpix discovered your secret stash of chili dogs and ate them all in one sitting?" asked Red, alarming Sonic. "Would you be fine with it then?" Sonic absoultely wouldn't be fine, he refuses to let anyone, whether it be person, animal, or Pokemon, threaten his secret stash of chili dogs (which isn't so secret to begin with, Sonic keeps his favorite food in a giant basket inside his closet, near a heater so they won't grow cold).
"...we oughta find that Vulpix, or else!" In an instant, Sonic went from not caring about the Vulpix and its whereabouts/safety to ensuring that the fox Pokemon is somewhere in the mansion - away from the hedgehog's not-so-secret chili dog stash.
After taking care of some necessary business at Paradiso, Rodin and Enzo arrived at the Smash Mansion, after Mega Man and R.O.B. teleported Cloud, Aerith, Bayonetta, and Luka back to the establishment. The eight arrived at the room where the teleportation device was located.
"Anyone know where I can find Mario, or at least Peach?" asked Rodin. "I shall give them a little 'update' on the officiant situation." The brawlers looked at one another, not knowing what Mario or Peach are up to, or where they are.
"I think I know where Peach may be," Mega Man perked up. "Follow me." So Rodin followed the blue bomber to Peach's whereabouts, just when the Duck Hunt Dog came scampering in, happily running around Cloud. In the mutt's mouth was a green luchador mask.
Duck Hunt Dog: *holds up green luchador mask, likely Link's, up to camera*
"This can't be the mask Link is wearing, is it?" Cloud asked the Duck Hunt Dog, taking the mask out of the canine's mouth; Duck Hunt nodded his head. "Hoo boy, Link is surely done for..." Enzo unsuspectingly exited the room, his Cheshire Cat grin grooming his face yet again...
"Since that dastardly Duck Hunt Dog ran off with your mask, I shall bestow upon you a second mask," the Flying Man gave Link another luchador mask, which looks identical to the previous one. Link accepted the mask and wore it on his head; he would turn back now, but Meta Knight is always watching him, and exiting the wrestling ring would be in vain.
"Your progress has been absolutely tremendous," said Meta Knight, having watched Link train from ringside the entire time. "Your strikes, your grappling, the way you sell wrestling moves...it's like poetry in motion." Either the Star Warrior has low expectations, or Link is just that great. "The triats you used to lack - la dignidad, la honra, el respecto, la pasion - you exemplified those traits and more, and for that, you have succeeded..."
"Succeeded at what?" questioned Link. "You did nothing but watch me from ringside, and let the Flying Man do all the work! Some mentor you're supposed to be..."
"I will be right back - I must find a worthy opponent to challenge you in your first wrestling match, so we can see how far you've progressed." Meta Knight turned and exited the dancing room, his cape flowing behind him. Link should use the Star Warrior's cape, most masked luchadors use capes. "Work on your wrestling skills until the time comes!" Meta Knight would say this seconds before he fully exited the room, as he began his vigorous search.
Meta Knight: Finding a suitable opponent for Link will be a hard task in itself. His opponent must be someone who's big, who's strong, and who's fast. Bowser, Rool, Donkey Kong, Ganondorf...they're all big and strong, but their speed is severely lacking. I can ask Captain Falcon if he would want to fight with Link...just can't have any female spectators. Can't put up a great match when you're constantly posturing.
"All this glorious training, and not a single bathroom break!" exclaimed the Flying Man, like Link is supposed to care. "You work on everything that you've been taught, while I make a trip to the little boy's room!" Little boy's room? The Flying Man darted out of the dancing room, leaving a masked Link alone...alone with Sheik, who happened to drop down from the ceiling and stick a perfect landing from the ceiling, scaring the daylights out of Link.
"Sh-Sheik, wh-why are you here?" stammered Link. Was Sheik watching the Hylian this whole time? If so, then that's just creepy.
"I'm only here to wish you the best in your little inaugural wrestling match," stated Sheik. Remember that Zelda and Shiek are the same person, Sheik is just an alter ego of Zelda's...so does that mean Zelda has some knowledge of what's going on?! "You certainly don't look like the fighting type..."
"Y-You're not angry about me wrestling, right? I mean, I DID wrestle before - I fought with Mayor Bo of the Ordon Village, and then with Gor Coron on Death Mountain, and I won both matches..." ...albeit struggling at certain points.
"Shhhhh..." Sheik effectively shushed Link, pressing her finger against the Hylian's lips. "Why would I be angry with you? I'm just glad that you've decided to toughen up, for once in your life, instead of having to rely on your Master Sword. You've really came a long way..."
"Uh...thank you, I guess." Also keep in mind that Sheik being Zelda's alter ego, the princess' conscience relatively remains the same as either herself OR Sheik...a little something for you to think about.
"Time for me to go now, got some other business to take care of. Meta Knight told you to refine your wrestling skills, is that correct? Better get to it, big guy." Sheik gave Link an uplifting pat on the shoulder, and vanished via smoke bomb. Link just stood there, befuddled by his conversation with the ninja - the ninja who also happens to be a different persona of Zelda.
Mega Man guided Rodin to the one and only place where the blue bomber would know where Peach would be - the laundry room. And there she was, happily throwing wet clothes inside the dryer so they can be dried and ready for the brawlers to wear. Peach is like the mansion's unofficial housewife.
Peach: Each and every time I do the laundry, I can't help but think of the wonderful time Mario and I will have together once we get married...As of right now, I'm not sure if Mario would be keen with moving out of the mansion, he's given so much to the residents (although they refuse to admit it) and he's the only person aside from Isabelle that can keep Master Hand's tempers down to a minimum. Losing Mario would greatly hinder the Smash Mansion more ways than one.
"Princess Peach, someone here would like to meet you," Mega Man said to Peach, who turned around and saw Rodin, his cigar in his mouth. "This is Rodin, he's the guy who makes Luka Redgrave deliver those flyers."
"It's a real pleasure to meet you in person," Rodin held out his hand to Peach, and the blonde shook his hand. Peach has never shaken a hand so rough and so strong in a good while. "It has been brought to my attention that Luka has been selected to be the officiant of your wedding, and I have conjured a circumstance that would..."
"Oh, you'll have to speak with Mario about that, he's supposed to be the one finding the officiant," said Peach. "I just saw him go into the printing room next door, you should speak with him about the officiant situation."
So Mega Man and Rodin headed next door to the printing room, where Mario and Jacky had just printed off Jacky's resume. All there's left to do is hand the resume to the guy in charge of the car dealership, and hope for the best.
"Mario!" Rodin called out the plumber's name, and Mario looked up, seeing Rodin walking towards him. "I'm Rodin, famed weaponsmith from Paradiso. I'm sure Bayonetta has been telling all sorts of stories about me during her stay at this mansion."
"Not exactly, she's been-a telling more stories about-a Luka than anything," smiled Mario, who had to force himself to listen to Bayonetta's stories about her boyfriend. The Umbra Witch's stories range from mostly entertaining to extremely far-fetched. "So what-a brings you here?"
Rodin would explain to Mario about how Luka Redgrave has been chosen to be the officiant for the plumber's wedding (something Mario didn't even know until now), and how Cloud and company want Luka to take a day off to officiate said wedding. The weaponsmith also added another detail to his explanation...
"If you want Luka to be the officiant of your wedding, then someone's gonna have to fight for his right to do so," stated Rodin. "That blonde swordsman dude with the spiky hair...Cloud, is that right? He mentioned something about his friend Link wrestling, and then I thought...why don't I wrestle with Link, and with the following stipulations - Link wins, Luka gets his day off, and he can officiate your wedding, and everyone lives happily ever after. I win, Luka doesn't get his day off, and he won't officiate your wedding, and you'll be stuck finding a suitable officiant for a foreseeable future. We got a deal?" Yeah, Enzo definitely influenced Rodin, big time...
"It's a deal..." Mario shook hands with Rodin, confident that Link will wipe the floor with Rodin. Mega Man and Jacky weren't feeling so confident, as they glanced at one another with concern.
Rosalina: It's finally over...the competition between Fox and Falco, and Nana and Popo...it's over, it's done. Now here comes the hard part...having to judge their creations. One side is going to be happy, and the other side may be slanted against me...
Luma: Mama, why don't you just call it a tie, then everyone can be happy!
Rosalina: Even if there was a tie, everyone would be angry with me - there has to be a definitive winner, and a definitive loser. Sadly that's the why life works sometimes...
Rosalina was seated at the table in the dining room, Luma at her side as always. On one side was Fox and Falco, with their smoothie creation that they think is the best, and on the other side was Nana and Popo, with what they feel is the best sundae they've ever created. It's up to Rosalina to have the final say on which treat is better.
"Here's our super duper smoothie..." Falco pushed his and Fox's smoothie towards Rosalina, who looked at it with a grimacing face. "It has caramel, sugar, some nutmeg, peanut butter...the works." Rosalina reluctantly took the straw in the smoothie and took a sip, her face grimacing with every sip she took. The way the smoothie tasted, it would be like cringe if cringe could actually be tasted.
"Very good smoothie, I can taste all the ingredients, they blend in very well," Rosalina gave her consensus, wishing the horrible taste would go away, while Fox and Falco exchanged high fives. Next up was Nana and Popo, and they gave Rosalina their sundae, which had chocolate syrup on top...and toppings such as carrots, pepperoni, rice, and a plethora of other food items that NEVER should be placed on sundaes, ever.
"We really went all out to impress you," Popo told Rosalina as the mother of Lumas ate a spoonful of the sundae with a spoon, having to force herself to eat the strange ice cream concoction. It was like torture, pure unadulterated torture for Rosalina and her poor taste buds.
"These sundaes aren't so shabby, these toppings worked a lot better than I would have thought," judged Rosalina, obviously fibbing. Popo did a fist pump in the air; Nana felt too indifferent to care. "Now as for who had the better treat..." Rosalina wanted to declare a winner, but she couldn't (and you can't say you blame her), as she buried her face in her hands, while Luma comforted her. "...but I just don't know..."
"Don't know what?" Ganondorf questioned as he showed up in the dining room. When the Demon Lord appears, something is always going down. "What are you fools putting Rosalina through?" Ganondorf identified the smoothie and the sundae, and easily interpreted them as grotesque food items.
"They're forcing mama to be a judge in a food competition, she has to sample a smoothie and a sundae, and determine which one is better!" explained Luma; Ganondorf glared down the Star Fox pilots and the Ice Climbers, who all felt ashamed of themselves (except Nana, she wanted nothing to do with the competition).
Ganondorf: Don't tell me Rosalina let those bozos Fox and Falco use the blender that I got for her...She did?! What was that woman thinking, letting those bums mistreat her blender?! With Fox and Falco together, they would be making strange concoctions, and shun traditional recipes for being "too mainstream"! *facepalms* Knew I should have bought Rosalina a hair dryer...
"How can she possibly determine if a smoothie is better than a sundae, and a sundae is better than a smoothie, they're both different things!" Ganondorf stated very angrily. "A smoothie is a beverage, and a sundae is a dessert! Is a smoothie a dessert?" Ganondorf would ask this to the Star Fox pilots.
"No..." answered Fox, fearful that Ganondorf would Warlock Punch him to oblivion.
"And is a sundae a beverage that one can drink?" Ganondorf would then ask this to the Ice Climbers.
"Not really, but technically..." Popo responded, but before he could prove a point, Ganondorf grabbed the concoctions the four had made, and threw them in a nearby garbage can.
"You all should feel ashamed of yourselves, not only wasting Rosalina's time, but wasting your time as well! Good day to you all!" Ganondorf angrily left the dining room, after putting the Star Fox pilots and the Ice Climbers in their place.
"So...is there anything else that your blender can do?" Fox asked Rosalina, putting an end to an awkward silence brought upon by Ganondorf.
"There's a certain milkshake recipe that I wish to show to you," the mother of all Lumas smiled. "Anyone care to see?" Everyone nodded their heads in agreement, and Rosalina smiled once more - seems like the Star Fox pilots and the Ice Climbers are now on the same page.
Meta Knight had found himself an opponent for Link - an opponent who himself came up to Meta Knight and wished to challenge the Hylian to a wrestling match, a match that would strangely dictate whether or not Luka would be able to officiate Mario's and Peach's wedding. This opponent was none other than Rodin, who was now in the wrestling ring, getting his mind ready for his match. At the opposing corner of the ring was Link, also getting ready.
"Remember your training Link, remember everything we've taught you!" the Flying Man, standing at ringside, said to Link. "And also remember...I am your courage!"
"You better not interfere with the match, if you know what's good for you," Meta Knight warned the Flying Man. "The fate of Mario's wedding is on the line, you know."
Enzo: The whole wrestling match to determine Luka Redgrave's fate at the wedding was solely my idea...got a lot of money riding on the match. I just got off of the phone with some hapless broker, and he said he would pay me a whopping $5,000 if Rodin picks up the win over Link - that should be more than enough for Christmas this year! In order to get that jackpot, I gotta work some magic...
Brawlers a many gathered inside the dancing room, to see Link vs Rodin go at it. Enzo tip-toed over to Link, and tapped the Hylian's foot, grabbing his attention.
"Hey buddy...you want some free cash?" the undertaker whispered to Link; the hero of Hyrule hardly has any cash on him, so he had no other choice but to nod his head. "Excellent, then you gotta do me a favor...throw away your match to Rodin! Take the pin, and the money will be yours!"
"But what about Luka Redgrave and his role at the wedding?" questioned Link. Him losing to Rodin would let down Mario and Peach, and would greatly muddle Mario's wedding planning.
"Ah, forget about him, he's a loser anyways! Certainly Mario can find someone more qualified than him to officiate his wedding...but if you wish to be broke forever, then that's your choice." Enzo walked away, leaving Link undecided on what he should do.
"Are both competitors ready?" Toad, the referee standing in the middle of the ring, asked Link and Rodin. Rodin gave a thumbs up; Link, coming back to his senses, gave a thumbs up too. "Ring the bell!" Mr. Game and Watch, the bell ringer, rang the bell, starting the match. Rodin ripped off his coat, revealing his muscular physique.
"Mother..." Link uttered in a high-pitched, frightened voice, despite the fact that he doesn't even have a mother. So he did he come into existence? Must have popped in thin air, like the other Link incarnations, presumably.
Rodin soon went to work on Link, putting the Hylian in a leg lock in an instant. Link, lying on the mat, looked across him, and saw Mario and Peach together, hoping that the hero of Hyrule would secure victory. Link then looked to his left, and saw Cloud, Aerith, Bayonetta, and Luka, all hoping Rodin wouldn't put an end to the Hylian's life. Link then looked to his right, and saw Meta Knight and the Flying Man, cheering him on. (Meta Knight chose to cheer on for Link silently, he's not exactly the extroverted type.)
Feeling the momentum and willpower that he needs, Link suddenly reversed Rodin's leg lock, and did a leg drop on the weaponsmith, before going on top of the turnbuckle and diving on top of Rodin. Many spectators cheered on for Link, much to the chagrin of Enzo.
Link and Rodin would continue to battle it out for ten more hard-fought minutes, with both men exchanging blows, strikes, holds, and everything included in a recipe for a great wrestling match. Luka's role as the wedding officiant was hanging in the balance.
Ike: I think Link picks up the victory, Rodin may be strong, but Link is faster, and more determined.
Roy: Yeah, I'm going with Link too, he's already proving to be quite the formidable opponent!
Yoshi: I'm not going for anyone to win - I just wanna see a great match between both competitors!
Roy: ...you do realize what the implications behind the match are, right?
Ike: Leave Yoshi alone Roy, that man doesn't even know who he's voting for in the election soon...
Roy: Is he even allowed to vote...?
The match would seemingly be reaching a climax, when Rodin slammed Link onto the mat. The weaponsmith stood a foot away from Link, his hand out, as he waited for the Hylian to get up so he could deliver a wicked chokeslam...
...but just then, a Vulpix jumped onto the wrestling ring, momentarily stopping the match. This was no ordinary Vulpix - this was the very Vulpix Tails was studying earlier. Rodin put his hand back down and quizzically looked at the fox Pokemon; Vulpix, suddenly feeling threatened, used Ember on Rodin, who shrieked as he miraculously jumped out of the way and hopped atop a turnbuckle. The mat soon caught on fire, and Mario leaped to action, taking out F.L.U.D.D. and using it to extinguish the fire.
"What the..." Link slowly got up, and saw Mario taking care of the fire, and Rodin perched atop the turnbuckle, waiting until Mario was done. Link then looked to his right, and saw Meta Knight and the Flying Man in their usual spots...and behind them Zelda, sporting a wry smile and waving to Link. Was the princess trying to affect the outcome of the match?
"The fire has been extinguished!" Toad announced after Mario took care of the fire and carefully took Vulpix out of the ring. Rodin got down from the turnbuckle. "The match shall resume as proceeded!" The match would restart after Link got back on his feet, but it didn't take long for another distraction to take place.
"Don't think you can hide from me forever, Vulpix!" Sonic leaped inside the ring, tackling Rodin to the mat. "Oh wait, you're not Vulpix...sorry about that." Rodin glared down the hedgehog as Tails and Red the Pokemon Trainer showed up.
"Drat, we were too late!" Tails snapped his fingers in disgust. He looked down, and saw Vulpix, in the cozy arms of Mario. "Well it looks like we found Vulpix, and she's unharmed too..."
"Ring the bell!" Toad called out to Mr. Game and Watch, who rang the bell, leading to an uproar of confusion within the dancing room. "Due to outsider interference, Rodin has been awarded a win! Therefore, the winner of this match...is Rodin!" Toad reluctantly said this as Rodin got up and raised both fists in the air, smirking, while the brawlers jeered and booed - some jeers and boos directed at Rodin, others at Sonic for screwing over the match.
Rodin: *lights cigar with a lighter, then adjusts sunglasses* It is what it is, it's a done deal - no officiating for Luka Redgrave at the wedding. Knew I would have that match with Link in the bag, interference or not.
"This-a blows!" Mario frowned as he and the rest of the angry brawlers exited the room. "Back to square-a one, I suppose..." Peach, who was accompanying Mario, felt some sympathy for her fiance; she would find an officiant herself for the wedding, but Mario promised he'd take care of the task in due time. But it's back to the drawing board for him and Pac-Man.
"Vulpix, Vulpix!" Vulpix, who was resting in Mario's arms, saw Tails and jumped out of the plumber's arms, and ran towards Tails, who flew and landed on the floor just to see the fox Pokemon he was studying. Vulpix embraced the yellow fox, rubbing against his body, and it brought a smile to Tails' face.
"Aw man, they kinda like each other..." Sonic analyzed Tails' and Vulpix's interactions from afar with Red. The hedgehog who was initially against Vulpix, for whatever reason, was amused by the happiness the fox Pokemon exuded. "Maybe it's because they're both foxes, they kinda have that built-in chemistry. Gotta think of it, that Shaymin Pokemon is a hedgehog - perhaps we could have a similar chemistry?"
"I can definitely see it happening," Red offered his take. "But if you wanna go find a Shaymin and all...then you're on your own buddy." Red patted Sonic on the back as he walked away.
"Alright man, I lost the match, now where's the money?" Link spoke with Enzo after the match. "You said you would pay me if..."
"Heh heh heh, I was never gonna pay you, I was just messing with you!" snorted Enzo, making Link furious. You wouldn't like Link when he's furious, in most situations, that is. "That money is going to me, a broker is gonna pay me in full because you lost! HA HA HA!" Enzo walked away laughing like a maniac, leaving Link somewhat disheartened.
"Don't listen to him, he looks like a no-gooder anyways," the Flying Man came over to Link, wrapping his arm around him. Link should have known that from the get-go... "You put up quite the valiant effort!"
"Much agreed, your effort was...estupendo!" Meta Knight came over to tell Link this. "Those four traits I talked about earlier, you showed them in your match against Rodin, and you shown it far better than I would have ever imagined! Surely Zelda would be greatly proud of you..."
"...and I sure am," said a voice behind Link. And that voice just so happened to be Zelda's, and the princess was standing there, with Cloud and Aerith.
Cloud: Gotta hand to Link, he was great in his match against Rodin. He looked like a full-fledged luchador, a strong positive...not to mention he didn't die, another strong positive.
"Were you the one responsible for Vulpix stopping the match?" Link asked Zelda, recounting the princess' smile during the brief interruption.
"Yes I did, it was my doing...remember when I said I was going to the laundry room? I had actually stopped by Tails' room instead, and took Vulpix with me; did all of that under my Sheik persona. I kept Vulpix in a closet until the time was right..."
"So why did you do all of that? Better question yet, did you know about me training under Meta Knight's wing as a luchador wrestler?"
"It was an inside job this whole time," confirmed Meta Knight, surprising Link. Now the Hylian's gonna ask even more questions... "Zelda would always complain to me about how soft you are, and how you always 'go with the flow', rather than being independent and self-reliant...so when Palutena sold out to Pit and bought him that wrestling ring, Zelda came to me and asked if I could toughen you up, just a little bit. I asked the Flying Man if he would be a part of your 'toughening', and he quickly obliged, without hesitation. Also, that Rodin match, which was planned out of nowhere did the trick...and you have certainly passed, with flying colors!"
"We did it all just for you..." Zelda smiled at Link, looking into his eyes lovingly and making the Hylian smile back.
So with the help of Zelda, Meta Knight, the Flying Man, and maybe to a lesser extent, Sheik, Link is now tougher, badder, and more resilient than before - and he did it without the use of his precious Master Sword.
It's a victory in itself.