Author's Note:
We did it people, 100 chapters! Thank you everyone who has come along for the ride, whether it was from the first chapter, or anywhere between then and now. From my fellow authors, to the guest reviewers...thank you for your awesome support along the way. I never thought I would reach this milestone, but it was thanks to you that I kept trucking along. So I thank you. This chapter will feature three new permanent characters, as well as a minor case of OCs. Just minor. Time for guest reviews:
"Can you include the characters from Dragon Quest VII and VIII? Have the characters from Chrono Trigger appeared yet? A Pokken and Tekken chapter? (If that hasn't happened already) And finally, will any other Tales characters show up in the next chapter?"
Maybe. Not yet. Probably. Tales characters may show up in the next chapter. Another guest review:
"PLEASE WRITE TO CHAPTER 200000000000000000000"
Ummmmm...no. That would be impossible; that would take me more than 30,000 years. The world might not even exist in 30,000 years. On to Roydigs22:
"Suggestion: team flare, in an attempt to avenge lysandre, launch a massive attack on the mansion. Only one force Can stand against them... The pokemon army. Also for slightly more humorous stuff, bowser Jr and the koopalings find a ton of magnets, and decide to prank lucario."
Probably going to hold off on Team Flare...but I might consider your Lucario prank.
Also just wanted to say thank you yet again. You guys are awesome!
Episode 100: Ciento
The milestone had finally been reached. One. Hundred. Episodes.
For one hundred episodes, the documentary crew caught a first-hand glimpse of everything that took place inside the Smash Mansion, and then some. For one hundred episodes, we got to witness what the mansion residents did in their spare time. For one hundred episodes, we saw relationships become anew, we saw new faces join the establishment...heck, we even saw Mike Tyson of all people, with the legendary boxer being banned from the Smash Mansion for good.
There was another man also banned from the mansion forever...Dr. Eggman. The mad scientist was so bitter about being banned, that he wanted to stick it to Master Hand one year later, and target Mario (and Sonic, just so his arch-nemesis could be involved in the big scheme of things) by initiating terrorist attacks in Seattle, Orlando, and Rio, and putting the blame on the plumber. With Dr. Eggman on national television, the plan was to reveal to the viewers at home that Mario and Sonic were hired by Master Hand to conduct the terrorist attacks, but Mario, Cappy, and a returning Captain Falcon would put an end to Dr. Eggman's plans, and had the evil genius arrested, likely doing a lot of time in prison.
With Dr. Eggman now in the past, it was time for Master Hand and the mansion residents to look towards the future, without having to worry about an evil foe getting in their way. And with it being the 100th episode, Master Hand opted to show the documentary crew a token of his appreciation by having Cilan bake them an exquisite cake, one that would be well worth the efforts of those filming the many residents you know and love.
Master Hand: Recent news have broke out stating that Dr. Eggman has been sentenced to a pretty long time in prison, which won't matter because A) he's still banned, and B) even if he were to break out of prison and come back, he would still get his butt kicked anyways. But now that the obese tomato known as Eggman is behind bars, away from the mansion (I hope they put Eggman in some prison in Russia), and with the hotel case finally being resolved, everything should be going back to normal now. Which means that there will be no distractions for Cilan, who is making a cake for you guys as you speak. You people have been like extended family members to the residents - the way you record the everyday activities of the residents, and follow them into bathrooms...you folks are truly one of a kind.
Cilan was humming happily to himself, as he was putting on the finishing touches of his beloved cake in the kitchen. As a suggestion from Master Hand and Mario, the connoisuer added damning faces of Dr. Eggman and the four evil individuals assisting the madman to the cake. You had Infinite, the strange black creature who Sonic claimed to be even faster than him; Fawful, the former pupil of Cackletta who was revived by Kamek's magic to help Dr. Eggman; Lysandre, the leader of Team Flare who had his Team Flare grunts do Eggman's bidding; and Jakob, the butler from Nohr who stuck around at the mansion for some time to purposely stir up trouble and divide the mansion as much as he could. Cilan was almost about done with the cake, as Mario entered the kitchen with Mamori.
"You should get-a the Kongs to be on-a your show, they would-a be great additions," Mario suggested to Mamori; wouldn't be great additions if the only thing Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong talked about were bananas. Mario and Mamori would see Cilan's cake, impressed by how the cake looked. "My oh-a my Cilan - that cake sure-a looks tasty! I should join the documentary crew for one-a day, just so I could-a have a slice!"
"Tastiness is my finest expertise, and I'm glad you like this lovely cake, Mario!" exclaimed Cilan, appreciating Mario's kind words. "I would give you a slice of cake, but Master Hand has forbidden me from sharing cake with any residents. Also forbid me from making a cake just for the residents, not at least until Thanksgiving. But he never said anything about having an early start, hehehe...what do you think of the cake, Mamori?"
"It looks spectacular, just like all your other culinary creations," replied Mamori, making sure not to accredit Cilan as much. It would be extremely redundant at this point, with with Cilan's superb culinary talents. Just then, Cappy's eyes would pop out of Mario's cap, as he scanned the cake.
"Yes, I agree wholeheartedly - if I had a functioning mouth, I could eat this cake in one giant gulp!" exclaimed the talking hat. Most residents were still getting used to Cappy, with Daisy being a long way off from ever accepting Cappy. "Are you sure none of the residents are allowed to try out the cake?"
"Nope, not even the smallest crumb! It's an order from Master Hand, a rule, and if I break one of Master Hand's rules, who knows what he'll do to me." Master Hand was definitely someone you should never mess around with.
"Well it appears that you're almost-a done with the cake, so Mamori and I will-a head over to the dining room and leave-a you be," Mario told the Cilan, who nodded as the plumber and Mamori went to the dining room to continue their discussion. Shortly after they entered the room, a sigh was heard, from Mario's cap.
"Mario, did you hear that?" Mamori asked the plumber, stopping him in place. "I think your talking hat friend just let out a sigh." Mario curiously took Cappy off his head, and saw that the talking hat was feeling a little down, as evidenced by his eyes looking down at the floor.
"Cappy what's-a wrong, I've never seen-a you this sad before..." Mario said to Cappy, who briefly looked at Mario with his saddened eyes before looking back down at the floor again. It wasn't that often Cappy felt some type of way about something.
"It's my sister, Tiara...I'm afraid she's still kidnapped, or missing," replied Cappy; he mentioned Tiara when he first met Mario in episode 97. "I thought that mustached creep Dr. Eggman had Tiara - like he had planned to use her with Peach - but it turns I was wrong...now I fear that Tiara might be lost and gone forever, and I may never find her!"
"Just because you don't-a know about Tiara's current condition doesn't mean-a you should feel so-a down Cappy - I mean, there's far-a more important things to worry about! Like poverty, and hunger, and economic debt, and-a war crimes, and relationships, and-a...uh..." Mario looked towards Mamori, wanting her to give some suggestions, but the only thing the idol singer gave Mario was a questionable look. "...anyways, you shouldn't worry about-a Tiara forever, it will only make-a things even worse."
While Mario didn't make a necessarily great point, it was something Cappy had no choice but to abide by...for now.
Bowser: Expecting a huge delivery today...and no, I didn't purchase anything online. Only lazy bums with zero people skills do that, especially around Christmas time. I received a letter in the mail a few days ago, from these guys called the Broodals. *takes out letter* I'm gonna read what the letter says; apparently it's written with a Brooklyn accent, for whatever reason, so just bear with me please... *clears throat* "Dear Bowser...heh heh heh, what's good, Boss? We're gonna send da goods to ya by mail, before da end of da week. Ya gonna be thankin' us later, I can guarantee dat! Is da princess handlin' herself well? We sure hope so! I'll talk with ya later..peace! Sincerely, Topper, leader of the Broodals..." *puts letter away* Willing to bet ten bucks the Broodals are sending me a manicure set. My nails need some major trimming!
The sound of the doorbell was heard, and the first to arrive at the front door was Bowser. The Koopa King was lowkey expecting Topper and his Broodal buddies to deliver him "da goods", looking forward to some serious nail-trimming. But when he opened the door, he was instead greeted by four folks wearing funky space suits, like they came from an entirely different dimension.
"Hello to you, spiky turtle man, how are you on this fine day?" the leader of this group asked a now skeptical Bowser. "My name is Dulse, and these are my good friends Zossie, Phyco, and Soliera. We're a part of he Ultra Recon Squad, and we hail from a world beyond the Ultra Wormhole." Well that sure explains a lot... "We came to this fine establishment looking for two Ultra Beasts - UB Assembly and UB Burst - and we were wondering if..."
Upon hearing the phrase "Ultra Beasts", Bowser shut the door on Dulse and stormed away. The Koopa King learned a great deal about the Ultra Beasts from his time with Professor Kukui (whom he called a "massive nerd" for his extensive knowledge about Ultra Beasts), and did not want anything to do with these extradimensional Pokemon.
But moments after Bowser stormed away, the doorbell rang yet again, and would you know it, Bowser came running back to the front door to see who it was. When he opened the door, he saw that nobody was there...but when he looked down, he saw a large white box, and a note attached to it, which Bowser read...
Here's da goods, Boss! We couldn't bring all the items together, but we'll send in the other stuff at a later time. Gotta make do with what ya got!
-Topper
"This box sure is big for a manicure set...must be some pretty top quality stuff inside," remarked Bowser as he put the note away and opened the box. There was no manicure set - the box would be too big for it anyways. However, the contents of the box made Bowser feel overwhelmingly giddy, like a young lad receiving a gaming system on Christmas Day. Whatever was inside the box, Bowser couldn't let anyone know or find out...
...so he immediately closed the door, and retreated to his room. He was too giddy to see where he was going, and so he bumped into an unsuspecting Link, who was up and walking ever since Midna healed him.
"Hey Link, watch where you're going you bum!" Bowser scolded as he got back up, although he was clearly in the wrong. "Don't think that just because you're all healthy again that you can bump into other people as you please! What are you, some kind of human bumper car?"
"And what are you supposed to be, some massive battleship on the sea?" retorted Link, as he got back on his two feet. "Hit me so hard, you almost sent me flying..." Link took a look at Bowser's box, and was filled with curiosity. "Say, Bowser, what's that you got inside that box?"
"What is this box that you speak of?" Bowser hid the box behind his shell, only making himself look extremely guilty. "Might be seeing things, Link...you did have those migraines and stuff, so there's a good chance you're hallucinating. Still suffering from some small side effects, I see; probably should have Leia check you out. Now if you excuse me, I have some...manicure duties to fulfill."
As if Bowser saying he had 'manicure duties to fulfill' wasn't suspicious enugh, the koopa king quickly ran off, keeping his white box concealed. Link looked on inquisitively, as Cloud joined the Hylian in the foyer.
"Sorry I was gone for so long - Master Hand wanted a handful of us to set up some lousy decorations in the ballroom," Cloud would explain his absence to Link. "Wanted to throw a party for the documentary crew - completely unnecessary, in my opinion. Just saw Bowser run away - what is he up to this time?"
"He had this suspicious white box in his possession, and he refused to tell me what was inside," replied Link, feeling slightly sore from Bowser bumping into him. "Since he doesn't want to tell me...I'll just have to find out what's in the box for myself."
Link: Oh, I'm gonna find out what's in the box, one way or another. I know I said I'll find out myself, but with Bowser, it might take a joint effort...
After his conversation with Mamori, Mario would return to his home, where he expected to see Peach and Lara. When the plumber entered his home, he didn't see see Peach, but he did see Lara...and oddly enough, Lloyd, who was in the living room, discussing things with the British tomb raider.
"The decommissioned Soviet weapons bunker I investigated always gave me the chills...the people inside it were acting like zombies!" Lara said to Lloyd, who was nodding his head attentively. "It was mostly thanks to the pathogen released into the air..." Was Lara speaking with Smart Lloyd, or Dumb Lloyd?
"Ah, yes, pathogen - the biggest agent of causing disease among many people," Lloyd said factually; Smart Lloyd it was. "Depending on how the pathogen is, a human individual can suffer from adverse effects, such as nausea, fever, and fatigue. What symptoms did these' zombie people' have?"
"Not exactly sure, but I do remember the men being very high in testosterone and adrenaline...so there was that. Unsure what kind of specific symptom that would be...but I'm not a doctor."
"I would be very interested in seeing how this pathogen spread among such a large group of people. A pathogen that can put one in a 'zombie' state is nigh deserving of fine research."
Mario would awkwardly walk by Lara and Lloyd, letting them enjoy their conversation about pathogens and whatnot, as he ran straight up the stairs and to his master bedroom. When he entered therein, he saw Peach, on the bed, speaking with somebody on the phone.
"Mhmm, mhmm, mhmm...okay then," said Peach, wearing concern on her face and leading Mario to wonder what the situation was. "I shall let Mario know...yes I will. I'll speak with you later!" Peach ended the phone call, and looked up and saw Mario. "Ah, Mario, you're back, just in time! I take it you had a great time over at the mansion?"
"As-a always, Princess Peach," Mario responded with a smile, always remembering to formally address her wife by her title. "Who were you-a speaking with?"
"I was speaking with Celica." This prompted Mario to give Peach a strange look. "...on Jacky's phone." Now it made complete sense. "Jacky, Alm, and Celica were at the grocery store, shopping for party appetizers for the documentary crew's 'Appreciation Day Party'. Think of it as a standard Super Bowl party, but without any football to splurge on. Anyways, Alm and Celica encountered their enemies Berkut and Rinea, and Celica just informed me that Alm and Berkut are in a fight."
"Why is Master Hand-a caring so much-a about the documentary crew all of a sudden?" Beforehand, Master Hand acted like the documentary crew were the scum of the earth, like they were worthless. Today, he wanted to show him his 'appreciation'. "Also, why are Berkut and-a Rinea at the store for, is this-a Berkut's doing?"
"Most likely, considering the beef he has with Alm. Pit told me about Berkut's 'confrontation' with Alm in the gaming room. I suggest you make your way over to the grocery store, see what's going on..."
And that's exactly what Mario did, as he sped to the grocery store in Master Hand's Lamborghini...or rather, as Master Hand's Lamborghini, thanks to Cappy's capture ability. When Mario parked the car and hopped out from the Lamborghini, many strangers looked on, wondering what in the heck just happened.
"You know, you could have driven the Lamborghini like a normal person..." Cappy said to Mario, who felt like Mario was completely abusing his ability. "Also why the Lamborghini, why not Luigi's green Dodge Charger?"
"Believe it or-a not, the Lamborghini is much-a more simpler than's Luigi's ride," was Mario's response, as he made his way to the grocery store. "Luigi's Dodge-a Charger has too many features - I'd spend less-a time driving and more-a time starting road-a rages by being invisible!"
Daisy: *sighs* ...yes, Luigi's Charger still has the invisibility feature, for God knows why...I keep telling him that having such a feature was pointless, since it's not like he could use it for anything useful, but Luigi states each and every time that driving invisible makes it easier for him to win street races at night...which means that Luigi is essentially earning illegal money. But on the plus side, he might never get arrested...
"Mario!" a voice called out to the plumber, from the grocery store entrance. It was Jacky, who was on the lookout. Mario quickly ran up to greet Jacky, refusing to let his flabby body bring him down. "About time you made it - things between Alm and Berkut have started to escalate, and now they're causing a huge scene..."
"Show-a me where they are!" commanded Mario, and so Jacky would lead the way. The Indy car racer would lead Mario inside the grocery, and guided him to the bakery section, where a pretty good crowd was surrounding Alm and Berkut, the two apparently bickering with one another.
"Alm and Berkut have been arguing with each other for quite a while now; we were just about done with shopping until Berkut and his woman Rinea showed up. Celica managed to sneak away and is checking out the groceries as we speak; Rinea, she probably hid herself in the women's restroom out of embarrassment."
"Please, Berkut, I do not wish to fight you, this isn't the right time, or the place..." Alm did his best to plead to Berkut, who was wielding his lance sword and looking for blood. Specifically, Alm's blood. "My friend Jacky, my wife and I were just shopping, minding our own business..."
"Enough of your ridiculous crap, I didn't come all the way back to this wretched city for nothing!" Berkut snapped on his arch-nemesis, as the bystanders were recording Alm and Berkut's spat on their cellphones. Should upload the footage unto Reddit for that delicious karma. "Now fight me like the man you think you are, or back away like a coward!"
"That black-haired guy followed Alm to the grocery store?" wondered Cappy, now under the assumption that Berkut was a bona fide stalker. "CREEPER ALERT!" Everyone looked at Cappy, left in awe about how Mario's cap had eyes and was able to speak.
"You should definitely use your Cappy friend to put an end to this stupid fight, before things begin to escalate. I'd hate for Berkut to actually kill Alm in cold blood, in a public setting like this..."
So Mario, now thinking on the fly, looked around, finding something to capture, when his eyes fell upon a turkey, left inside a buggy. The plumber took the turkey, unwrapped it, and hurled Cappy at it, capturing it. Now a turkey wearing a red cap, Mario passed through the crowd and approached Alm, grabbing his attention, before running off and befuddling everyone. But Alm and Jacky, they knew what was up.
"Well what do you know, a live turkey in the grocery, someone should go catch it - that someone being me," Alm kindly said to Berkut, who was just dying to pierce the king of Valentia with his lance, just one time. "I should go catch it before it, uh, stabs someone to death with its...killer...turkey...wings!" Alm would run off, with Jacky following after him, as the two, along with Celica, who was standing by, exited the grocery store, with Jacky snatching up Turkey Mario...without having to pay at all for the turkey, and without anyone seeing him either. It was unwrapped, so there was no barcode to scan.
"So Alm chose the coward way, I see..." snarled Berkut, putting his lance away as everyone walked off and resumed shopping. "Since he refuses to fight me here...then I'll just have to take the fight to him, at the Smash Mansion! And you, Rinea, shall come along, and beat Alm's wife Celica to the...Rinea? Rinea! Where are you? I hate when you run off like this..." As Berkut went to go search for his lover, the man who left his shopping cart unattended would return to his cart, and noticed something was missing...
"WHERE ON EARTH IS MY TURKEY?!" the man shouted, loud enough for everyone to hear. His Thanksgiving dinner was, at the moment, perfectly ruined.
Sometimes, it felt great to be back. Especially if you were famed F-Zero racer Captain Falcon. The Smash veteran, who was arrested and sent to jail for racing against demon hunter Dante in a street race, which was essentially set up by Jakob to have him sent to jail as a means to prevent guys like him finding out about Dr. Eggman's attacking the Four Seasons hotel, felt relieved to be back at the mansion. And now that Captain Falcon was back...well, nothing major really happened since Falcon returned, but his presence was missed.
Captain Falcon: Man, I knew Jakob was a jerk, but I had no idea that he was THAT big of a jerk. I mean, snitching on me and having Nowi break up with me? That's just low. I'm sure Layton and Luke can give Nowi the 4-1-1 on what Jakob's true intentions were, and then maybe we Nowi and I can get back together again. The last thing I'd want would be for Nowi to be dating a man just as childish as her...not that her immaturity is a big deal, but Nah needs at least one parent she can take seriously.
Having witnessed Knuckles drop some bars in the recording studio, Fox and Falco returned to the Star Records room, where they would find Captain Falcon and Little Mac, standing across from one another. Both men looked like they were either getting pumped up for no reason, or experiencing the worst cramp of their lives. Layton was in a chair, looking on, while Doc Louis was rooting for Little Mac.
"C'mon Little Mac, show that man Falcon who's boss!" cheered Doc Louis, the type of guy who would be in a bathroom with Little Mac, rooting for him to drop the biggest deuce of his life. Fox and Falco were looking on, no doubt bewildered by what was even supposed to be taking place.
"Falco and I deserve a thorough explanation of what's happening here," Fox spoke up after finding the courage to speak. Falco was left speechless, deciding to let his silence do the talking for him.
"Little Mac and Captain Falcon are having an 'ab-off', to see who has the better abs, and apparently they appointed me as the judge," explained Layton, feeling bad for agreeing to judge this strange competition. "I though they would just show me their abs, have me tell them who has the better abs, and be done with it...but sadly I thought wrong."
"You think you can beat me, Little Mac...but soon you'll understand how bitter the ultimate taste of defeat is!" exclaimed Captain Falcon, sweat pouring down his face as he was exerting all of his energy into his...into his abs. Like that was even possible. "Better drink your salty tears now!"
"It will be you who'll be drinking your tears, the tears of defeat!" Little Mac fired back, doing the same thing Captain Falcon was doing. Unable to stomach this "ab-off" anymore, Layton had no choice but to declare a winner.
"Okay, I've had just about enough of this..." said the detective, getting up from his seat and pointing at Captain Falcon. "Captain Falcon, you're the winner!" Both Falcon and Little Mac stopped overexerting themselves, with Falcon raising his arms up in the air in victory. Doc Louis would head over to Little Mac and comfort his protege - the boxer repeatedly pushing his trainer away - as there was a knock on the Star Records door.
"That must be Knuckles, probably done spitting fire in the recording booth," said Falco, as he went over to the door. When he opened it, he saw the Ultra Recon Squad - the same foursome that met Bowser earlier. Upon seeing their outfits, Falco REALLY wanted to call the Ultra Recon Squad nerds.
"Greetings, walking bird friend, sorry to disturb you," said the leader of the squad, Dulse. "We came to this room from the hallway window, thanks to some cat creature that might've been a Pokemon. I am Dulse, and these are my good friends Zossie, Phyco, and Soliera. We're a part of he Ultra Recon Squad, and we hail from a world beyond the Ultra Wormhole. Do you know anything about...Ultra Beasts?"
With Cilan likely finished with the cake, and the party appetizers needed to be prepared by Alm and Celica, the newly crowned party planner Pac-Man was in the ballroom, analyzing how the ballroom looked. The decorations were set in order - only thing left on Pac's agenda was to bring in the cake and the appetizers.
"Well Pac-Man, this won't be the greatest party ever, but I'm positive the folks behind the documentary will love it," Pac-Man said proudly to himself as he analyzed the ballroom, wearing a smile on his face with hands on his hips. "Master Hand would kill me if they don't..."
Co-Producer #1: Since we were deliberately forced by Master Hand to do this, we'll just get it out of the way...hello, I'm LeVar, and I am one of the executive producers of the series, Smash Life.
Co-Producer #2: And you can call me Brad, the other executive producer of the series. Doing Smash Life was pretty much LeVar's idea...I'm just here to reap the benefits.
Co-Producer #1: Totally untrue...anyways, when we first started this documentary, we never would've imagined how far we came. Fox and Falco inherit control of Star Records. Luigi and Daisy get married. Freaking Aerith Gainsborough appears. That epic prank war happened. We've seen new additions to the mansion, like Leia, Cilan, and the idol singers from Fortuna Entertainment. Heck, we even went to Rio for the 2016 Olympics! And to Disney World as well!
Co-Producer #2: Of course you would leave out that one time Manaphy was switching bodies left and right...there was something about Kirby being in Link's body that bugs me out to this day. Can't be the only one...
"Splendid work, Pac-Man, really love what you've done to the place!" exclaimed Master Hand, who would join the eater of ghosts in the ballroom and seeing how all the decorations were set. "So far you're really proving your worth as the new party planner!"
"Thanks Master Hand, you're making me blush..." smiled Pac-Man - wasn't really anything worth blushing about. Wasn't like Master Hand was anointing him as the greatest ghost gobbler in all of existence. "Though I couldn't have done it without the help from the others, decorating the ballroom doesn't require the work of a one man band!"
"Forcing your fellow residents to do involuntary work against their will...I'm already digging your style, Pac-Man. If I could, I could pay you for your efforts." Master Hand looked towards the front of the ballroom, and felt that something was...amiss. "Pac-Man, where are the gifts?"
"G-G-Gifts? Golly, I never really thought about the gifts...might've been a slight oversight on my part..." Not sure if a "Appreciation Day" party, or a surprise birthday party for an unsuspecting someone from the documentary crew.
"Slight oversight?! How on earth are we going to show our love and appreciation to the producers of the series, if we don't give them gifts? Are we going to let their perilous efforts go unmerited? Have you no heart? Have you no conscience? Have you no soul?!"
"Master Hand you've never cared for the producers or anyone else on the cast to begin with...you know what, I'll get them some gifts. We have a few more hours until the party begins; once Cilan brings in the cake, and Alm and Celica bring the appetizers, we'll be set to go. Should get the gifts before then."
"Thank you Pac-Man for wanting to show your gratitude! That's what I expect from a party planner like yourself. Don't let me down, alright?" And with that, Master Hand disappeared, leaving Pac-Man in quite a pickle.
A pickle he would have to get out of, lest he wanted to keep his party planner duties.
"Welcome everyone, to another spectacular episode of Microwave Idol Mamorin!" Mamori gleefully said to the camera, with her co-hosts Ashley and Asuka at her side. "We're your hosts, Asuka, Ashley, and myself, Mamori! We're gonna warm up your heart, with the press of a button!"
"Today on our show we have two special guests, Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong, hooray..." Ashley announced in the most unenthusiastic way possible, as the Kongs appeared in the frame. Diddy waved to the camera, as Donkey Kong did his hand-shaking victory pose from Smash 4. "I hope we don't start talking about bananas..."
Away from Mamori and company was Cilan, in the dining room and looking proudly at his now-finished cake. The cake was towering on the dining room table, in all its glory, and just looking at him made Cilan's smile swell up with glee. As Cilan gleamed at his cake, Sonic and Tails - now back to being good friends on good terms - entered the dining room through the back door, wielding paint guns and splattered in paint.
"Man, that paintball battle with the Inklings sure was fun!" Tails excitedly said to Sonic, who nodded in agreement. "It was great having fun out there, just like old times!" It only took those two a week to mend their friendship back together.
Tails: Hey Sonic, now that we're friends again, doesn't that mean you're going to stop hanging around with Crash? I know you two have built up some great chemistry with one another since Crash and his folks joined the mansion...
Sonic: Tails, are you out of your mind? Why would I drop Crash? He's like a dumber version of you! Much like how you're a smarter version of Crash. And you know what that's supposed to mean? Is that you're both goobers who'll agree to do the stuff I wanna do. You're both like pack mules, only less enough of a pushover.
Tails: It's great to have you back, Sonic...
"Woah Cilan, that's one awesome cake you got there!" Sonic told Cilan after seeing the connoisseur's fine creation. "Still doesn't make up for you personality, always acting like you're high or something, but you definitely did a bang-up job with the cake!"
"Sonic that was the nicest thing you've ever said to me...in fact, that was the only nicest thing you've ever said about my food!" stated Cilan, momentarily looking away from his cake just for this one moment. "So I'll take your words with much appreciation!"
"Mind if I take a closer look at the cake? I know Master Hand mentioned something about not tasting the cake, let alone touching it, but he never said anything about looking at it!" Sonic walked towards the cake, wanting to get a closer view...
...but then, by some act of freak nature, the hedgehog slipped on some wet substance on the floor, and it caused him to not only slip, but fall onto the dining room table and slide across, knocking down Cilan's cake in the process. Cilan looked in horror as his cake toppled on the table, most of the contents falling unto the floor, as Sonic landed on the other side of the table, his face smothered in cake icing.
Then Master Hand appeared. Cilan's worst dreams were about to become a nightmare.
"What the...what in blazes happened to the cake?" wondered Master Hand, observing the now ruined cake, before looking at Cilan, who was shaking with fear. "Cilan, I gave you all the time in the world to bake the cake...and THIS is what you have to show me?!"
"Master Hand, you don't understand, I was already finished with the cake..." Cilan tried to explain, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. "But Sonic, he inadvertently ruined it...he wanted a closer look, but he slipped and somehow slid onto the table and knocked over the cake...and ruined it..."
"So what you're telling me is that you couldn't guard the cake with your life? How could I possibly ask you to bake anything ever again? You really want me to go back to Palutena of all people? Alas, you've left me with no choice...Cilan, seeing how you have failed me, you've left me with no choice but to revoke your chef duties at the mansion. You're...DEMOTED!"
Upon hearing this, the already disheartened Cilan fell to his knees and sobbed, his face in his hands, as Tails comforted him. A disappointed Master Hand went into the kitchen, and dragged a bewildered Mamori inside the dining room, effectively interrupting her web show.
"Mamori, seeing that you have cooking skills, you've been named the new head chef of the Smash Mansion!" Master Hand jovially announced to Mamori, the idol singer's face indicating she was not ready for the role. "And I want to put your new cooking skills to the test, by baking a cake for the party later in the day. I have the utmost confidence that you'll get the job done."
"But baking a cake isn't considered cooking, and also I've never baked a single thing in my life..." explained Mamori, wishing she could turn down the offer to Master Hand. "Let alone cook...I've only microwaved food my entire life..."
"...and your microwaving experience will be sufficient for baking the cake. It just has to be big enough for the documentary crew to consume. Not keeping any leftover slices, they'll be thrown away. I'll just go away, and leave you be...don't want to interrupt you from your greatness!"
So Master Hand left the dining room, as Mamori looked on with a thousand-yard stare, and Cilan continually sobbed with Tails comforting him. Sonic, eating the icing off of him, got up from the floor, realizing he dun goofed up.
Sonic: Shouldn't have complimented Cilan...doing so placed a hex on him and made him lose his chef role. I should lift his curse so everything will be pushing up daises for him again!
Mamori: Apparently Master Hand expects me to bake a cake, for whatever reason, even though I don't have any baking experience. I'll just have to ask Ashley and Asuka to help me out with baking the cake. And the Kongs, too. I'll just have to monitor how many bananas they use...
After speaking with Jacky, Mario brought Alm and Celica to his place, so they could work on the appetizers. Reason being that Berkut and Rinea could arrive at the mansion looking for the Valentian couple, and they would never think about looking for the lovebirds in Mario or Luigi's homes.
"Just keep working, just keep working, just keep working..." Celica repeated to herself, keeping her mind off of the spat Alm had with Berkut as she was working on the pigs in blankets. No, not actual pigs in blankets, that sounded gross and inhumane. Sausages wrapped in croissant rolls, or bacon if you were British. Alm on the other hand was preparing the kebabs, whilst looking outside the window.
"Has anyone seen-a my car keys?" asked Luigi, who left his car keys at Mario's home for whatever reason and was now looking for them. He wouldn't find them lying in the living room...but rather, in the kitchen. "Alm, why are my car-a keys in one of the kebabs?"
"What about your car keys?" questioned Alm, before looking down and seeing Luigi's car keys pierced through a skewer. "Oh I see...sorry about that." Alm took the keys off the skewer, and handed them to Luigi. "Shouldn't have left them lying on the kitchen counter..."
"You seem a bit-a distracted, Alm; Mario informed-a me about you encountering your old-a rival Berkut. I take it he's-a still on your mind?" Alm looked down at the floor; he wanted to say no, but he had to come clean...
"Fine, I admit - I'm on the lookout for Berkut. I fear that he and his woman Rinea might plan a sneak attack on me, out of nowhere, when I least expect it. I've been looking out the window, looking for Berkut's whereabouts..."
"Looking for Berkut isn't going to help make the kebabs, Alm..." Celica reminded her husband, staying on task. "Also you have the pacifier on one of the kebabs." Alm looked down and saw Charles' pacificer on the kebab, and immediately fixed the error.
"Try and think-a of something else, thinking about your nemesis won't solve-a anything," Luigi said to Alm, patting him on the back. "Think about how-a pretty your wife is, that's what I do some-a times." Luigi walked away, returning home, as Alm continued his job...albeit with a smile on his face.
A new Pokemon game was released today, and two youngsters were playing the new games - Bowser Jr. who owned Ultra Sun, and Villager, who owned Ultra Moon. The two were in Bowser Jr's room, trading each other Pokemon.
"I got a shiny Metagross, level 50, with a Mega Stone," Villager said to Bowser Jr. How on earth did he level up Metagross to level 50, in so little time? Did he hack the game, and got an infinite amount of rare candies? "What do you got?"
"Necromaza, in its Dusk Mane form!" replied Bowser Jr, slightly bragging, as Villager's eyes went wide. A legendary Pokemon like Necromaza - especially one that was a game mascot - would be worthy on any Pokemon team, and the fact that Bowser Jr. had this Pokemon already must mean that the Koopaling perhaps hacked his game too. "You wanna trade?"
"No way would I ever turn down a trade offer like that! Let's get this trade started!" So Villager and Bowser Jr. traded their respective Pokemon, as Villager was almost salivating at the idea of having a Dusk Mane Necromaza in his Pokemon party. The excitement inside of him was palpating...
But when the trade was completed, Villager felt confused, when he was looking at a Pokemon, one that was yellow, looked like a worm, and was inside a red shell. This Pokemon evidently wasn't Dusk Mane Necromaza - it didn't even look as cool as the prism Pokemon.
"Is this...is this a Shuckle?!" frowned Villager as he glared at Bowser Jr, laughing so much that he nearly fell off of the bed. "Bowser Jr, you straight up played me! I'll never forgive you for this!"
Bowser Jr: True story...I once traded my level 2 Pidgey for Sonic's Zekrom! Sonic was thoroughly disgusted when he caught Zekrom - kept complaining about how ugly it was and how you couldn't see its face. It was so ugly, Sonic was uncomfortable about playing anymore. It wasn't until after he traded Zekrom that Sonic's faith in playing Pokemon games was restored, and he would accept my Pidgey, with open arms...before releasing it into the wild.
"Ha ha, can't believe you fell for that - you know I wouldn't have caught Necromaza yet!" laughed Bowser Jr, as Villager was feeling super salty. "But thanks for the Metagross anyways, it will look...very nice...on my team..." Bowser Jr. furrowed his brow when he caught Pac-Man in his room, rummaging through his stuff. "Pac-Man, why are you in my room?"
"Master Hand expects me to give the producers some gifts at the party," explained Pac-Man, browsing through Bowser Jr.'s collection of Nintendo 3DS games. "So, I thought about giving them some Nintendo 3DS games, preferably the old ones you don't really play anymore. Would they enjoy playing Tomodachi Life and Kid Icarus: Uprising? Or what about Shovel Knight and Hyrule Warriors? Or maybe even..."
Bowser Jr. had enough of Pac-Man rummaging through his stuff, and so he spat a fireball at the eater of ghosts, making him scram and run out of the room, dropping the 3DS games to the floor. Pac-Man's search for gifts just got even more difficult.
While his only biological son was ripping off Villager with egregious trades, Bowser was in his room, combing his hair in front of a mirror. Seldom did the koopa king room himself, save for special moments - he always thought grooming was for vain, self-centered men, and Bowser himself didn't think he was vain and self-centered...contrary to what most of his past behaviors entail. But what was the special occasion?
"Oh, Bowser, your son Lemmy just vandalized Wario's motorcycle!" a voice called out to the koopa, making him growl with fury. Disciplining his children was never a hobby of his. Then again, who would consider disciplining children a hobby.
"I thought I told that boy good and well not to mess with thing anymore - it's too expensive!" Bowser stopped grooming, as he placed his comb down and angrily stomped out of the room. "He should instead vandalize Master Hand's Lamborghini - nobody gives a crap about that thing anymore! I'll show him how it's done..."
Once Bowser left his room, Midna entered therein, seeing that the coast was clear. The imp then motioned to someone outside of the room, as Link and Cloud entered the room, looking for the white box.
"That white box has to be around here somewhere," said Link, as he and Cloud scoured the entire room for the white box. Midna, who was only tasked with luring Bowser away, felt like she didn't have to look for anything, and instead opted to monitor the swordsman duo.
"Try looking underneath the bed," suggested Cloud, and Link would do just that, as Cloud looked in the closet. Sitting on the floor, next to some pink high heels (Bowser wears heels? Or do those shoes belong to Peach?), was the white box. "Link, I found the box!"
"Great, bring it over here!" Link motioned Cloud to come over, as the swordsman placed the white box on Bowser's bed. Link took off the lid, and took out a bouquet, a dress, and a band. Nothing really spectacular inside. Until, a ghost-like figure sprung out of the box, with the visage of what appeared to be a tiara. Its eyes were like Cappy's, albeit with eyelashes, to distinguish this creature as a girl."
"Well hello there, didn't expect you to come out of the box...what's your name?" Cloud asked the creature, who did not respond. Cloud didn't feel like waiting for a response either. "Ah, the shy type, huh? Nothing wrong with that..." Cloud then turned his attention to Link. "Given how this floating thing looks, it could be a friend or relative of Cappy. How about we head over to Mario's place, and speak with Cappy ourselves?"
The creature appeared to be delighted by this suggestion, as evidenced by her nodding her head. Off to Mario's house it was..."
Pit: It's the 100th episode, which means its a perfect time for a breakthrough. This episode is in need of something new, something fresh - a development so big, it could cause shock waves that would remain forever. Kirby and I selected the one man that would provide us with this breakthrough, a breakthrough so big, that things at the mansion, will never, EVER, be the same...
"Just so we're clear, Rosalina has already what we'll be eating at our Thanksgiving dinner next week," Chrom said to Marth, the two blue-haired men standing at the doorway of Chrom's room. "With Peach gone, Rosalina will be dictating what is and isn't allowed on Thanksgiving. Everything on that day will be planned by her."
"Alright then, thanks for the info," thanked Marth, as he walked away, but he wouldn't get that far before returning to Chrom. "Oh, and one more thing - what about the desserts, will there be any desserts for Thanksgiving?"
"Of course there'll be desserts you bozo, what's a Thanksgiving dinner without any desserts to devour afterwards?" That's no way to talk to your ancestor, Chrom. "Since you were wondering, it will be Cilan who will do the desserts." But would Master Hand allow Cilan though? "Plan is subject to change, however; you know how extremely fickle Master Hand can be."
"Believe me, I know Master Hand's volatility like the back of my hand...wouldn't be surprised if MH has Palutena cooking the Thanksgiving food, just like two years ago. So many bad memories...well, I'm off now, talk to you later."
So Chrom closed his bedroom door, as Marth walked away to continue the rest of his day. As he walked down the hallway, he encountered Pit and Kirby, who were pointing at him accusingly. The hero-king found it very amusing.
"Marth, hero-king of Athena...we know your secret, and for this 100th episode spectacular, you must come clean and admit your secret to the whole world!" Pit said to Marth, still amused. "Now's your chance to admit your secret, lest you face the consequences!"
"Last time I heard about this '100th episode spectacular', some party was being organized for the documentary crew in the ballroom," remarked Marth, being serious while trying not to smile or laugh. "And I don't have a secret, and I don't have to face any consequences."
"But you do, Marth, and now it's your time, your time is now! Marth, hero-king of Athena, are you...a WOMAN?!"
Obviously offended by this question, Marth breezed past Pit and Kirby, going from amused to annoyed in a snap. Marth's gender and masculinity was always questioned, and he wasn't going to allow any questioning today. Shortly after the hero-king left, Sora approached Pit and Kirby, looking like he was in trouble.
"Pit, Kirby, just the two I needed to see!" the Keyblade wielder exclaimed. "I saw these two monsters outside, near the lake, and they're really close to the mansion." Assuming these monsters were Heartless, Pit and Kirby exchanged looks with one another.
"You sure these 'monsters' aren't Heartless?" asked Kirby, just to make sure Sora wasn't going crazy. "We already took care of the Heartless, if you remember."
"The monsters I saw were not Heartless by any means - must be an entirely different species never seen before. If you don't believe me, I can show the monsters to you!" Left with no other choice, Pit and Kirby opted to follow Sora outside.
The Ultra Recon squad were in the Star Records room, huddled around Coco along with Fox, Falco, and Layton. Coco was on her laptop, looking up info about the Ultra Beasts Dulse and company were looking for. Layton would be looking up online himself, but his tech savvy skills weren't up to par with Coco's.
Coco: Same old, same old, some things will never change...I'm still doing Professor Layton's dirty work, doing things that he probably should do himself. Layton said that he might stay until Christmas time, and I heard that every year the mansion does Secret Santa - so there's a good chance Layton would ask me to find his Secret Santa a gift. Thereby ruining the tradition.
"Yes, that's it, that's one of the Ultra Beasts we're looking for!" Soliera pointed at the laptop screen, at an image of a strange, multi-colored alien-like Pokemon. "The codename for it is UB-Burst - it's a dual fire and ghost type."
"Lemme see if I can find the other Ultra Beast..." said Coco, tapping away on her pink laptop as she searched online. Moments later, she came across a Pokemon that looked like a tall brick tower, with four legs and an only eye. "What about this guy?"
"That would be UB-Assembly, a rock and steel type," replied Zossie, wondering how information about the Ultra Beasts could be online. "What I really want to know, is how UB-Assembly and UB-Burst found their way into this dimension, from Ultra Space.
"Don't mind if I ask, but what exactly is 'Ultra Space'?" Fox asked the Ultra Recon Squad. "Is it something like an entirely different galaxy, like on Star Trek?" The Ultra Recon Squad were clearly confused, as Star Trek did not exist within their dimension.
"Ultra Space is simply an alternate dimension, one where all the Ultra Beasts lie," explained Phyco; Fox was almost right, in a way. "There are also these things called Ultra Wormholes, which is kind of just like Ultra Space, but more...complex, if you will."
"Coco, you must come quick, it's an emergency!" Aku floated inside the Star Records room, alerting the blonde bandicoot. "It's Crash...he and Pac-Man are in a really big fight, in the middle of the hallway, and there's no telling if their fight will ever end. You must put a stop to it, Coco, before things get out of..." Aku looked down, and saw the Ultra Recon Squad, suddenly taking an interest in them...only because of their outfits. "Ooh, I just adore your outfits! What are you all supposed to be, Star Trek cosplayers?"
"Before we leave this dimension, we should learn what this Star Trek is all about..." Dulse quietly whispered to his companions, who all nodded their heads.
Aku would guide Coco to the hallway, the hallway in which this epic fight was taking place...Crash and Pac-Man, embroiled in a simple tug-of-war over Crash's trusty bazooka. This fight was so big, it could potentially leave both men disfigured forever, leave behind lasting scars; it was even worthy of being uploaded to YouTube and become viral for its extremely violent nature.
But yeah, this fight wasn't really a fight, it was just a harmless tug-of-war battle. Coco was amused, watching this battle go down, and she would give her unamused look to Aku, who was making it seem like poor Crash was going to be absolutely pummeled by Pac-Man.
"Those two have been overaggressive with how they've been pulling on the bazooka, and I felt like they had to be stopped at once," was all Aku could say. Coco rolled her eyes and shook her head, before heading over to Crash and Pac-Man, and snatching the bazooka away, thus ending the tug-of-war battle for good.
"Pac-Man, if you really wanted some ghost-catching technology, could you just get your own bazooka?" Coco asked the eater of ghosts, who was increasingly growing more nervous and desperate. "Or at least ask Luigi? He hunts down ghosts just like you do!"
"No Coco, you got it all wrong, you don't understand!" Pac-Man tried to make his plea to the blonde bandicoot. "You see, Master Hand wants me to give the co-producers from the documentary crew gifts, and I imagined Crash's bazooka would be the perfect gift for one of them."
"Tell me why exactly one of the producers would want a bazooka that can only shoot wumpa fruit. Better yet, why the producers would even need gifts in the first place. I mean, I never see a guy like Dick Wolf receive lousy gifts from NBC for producing Law & Order!"
"I...I really don't know, Coco. I truly don't. But I gotta do whatever it takes to make Master Hand happy..."
Pac-Man: I would hate to lose my job as party planner - I've only had that job since this morning. If I don't find any suitable gifts, I'm screwed...
Bowser would return to his room, after dealing with his son Lemmy. The Koopa King gave Lemmy a stern talking to, scolding him for vandalizing on Wario's motorcycle, and later taught him how to vandalize Master Hand's Lamborghini, so future incidents would never happened again (Bowser made dang sure to repair the Lamborghini ASAP).
Once inside the room, Bowser locked the door and saw the white box on his bed, wondering how it got there. The koopa checked the box, and found the wedding dress and bouquet. But the tiara creature? She was nowhere to be found; she had went with Link and Cloud.
"Someone must have went into my closet and took the tiara thing, how could they?!" growled Bowser, flames fuming out from his mouth. "Whoever it was, they shall pay..."
With the help of Ashley, Asuka, and the Kongs, Mamori baked the cake for the party - or at least trying to. Thing was, Mamori had no baking experience, and neither did Ashley, Asuka, or the Kongs. So when the five got the cake done...it sure looked like a mess. It would make any cake lover cry their eyes out.
"You gotta admit, the bananas at the top were a nice touch," said Donkey Kong, looking at a cake that would be more suitable for a small birthday party than a party chock full of people. The bananas were the only saving grace of the pastry.
"Master Hand should have never asked me to bake the cake, I wasn't cut out for it..." sighed Mamori, wanting to throw the cake away and put this experience behind her for good. "We can't allow Master Hand to see this...creation."
"Yeah, Cilan would obviously make a cake much better than this abomination," remarked Asuka; talk about an understatement of the century. "Speaking of whom, where is Cilan, is he still moping?"
Cilan was near the dining room area, and yes, he was still moping, as he was seated against the wall, wiping away his tears. Sonic and Tails saw Cilan from afar, during his moment of despair, and wished to put an end to his troubles.
"Look Sonic, I have nothing against you and whatever ideas you have in mind...but the idea you have for Cilan, I'm not so sure of," Tails said to his hedgehog friend - this was the type of answer Sonic lowkey expected. "You really wanna go through with it?"
"We have no other choice Tails - my own curiosity screwed over Cilan, and inadvertently placed a hex on him," replied Sonic, still under the assumption that Cilan was "cursed" because of him. "I've done Cilan wrong, and I gotta turn the wrong into a right!"
"I'm impressed, Sonic - rarely do I see you take this much blame for something you did wrong, and wanting to fix the problem. Feeling a bit surprised as well..."
Tails: Starting to think the rift between Sonic and I benefited Sonic in a way, teaching him to be more culpable for his actions. It must have helped Sonic out a lot. Perhaps I should instigate a beef between Sonic and Knuckles to help flesh out Sonic...Knuckles would be a PERFECT guy to have a beef with!...I totally meant that in a good way.
Sonic and Tails approached Cilan, who was solemnly looking down at the floor before looking up at the two best friends. At the moment, the connoisseur didn't want any company around him; he wanted to bask in his sadness, like losing his head chef role equated to his life being officially over.
"What do you two possibly want?" Cilan asked Sonic and Tails, his voiced choked up with emotion. "Came to make fun of me, because of my misfortune? You witnessed me being jawed out by Master Hand...bet you came back to make me feel even worse than I already do..."
"First off, let me just say that I'm sorry about your cake - it was my fault that your cake got destroyed," Sonic apologized to Cilan, making the connoisseur perk up - hearing an apology from Sonic was music to Cilan's ears. "But I know a way that I, or we, can make things up to you, and give Master Hand your job back!"
"It's no use, there's no way I can recreate the stellar cake I already baked and decorated...might as well head back to Striaton City, and soak in my sorrow and shame. The mansion no longer deserves me..."
"Oh, but there is a way, Cilan...and it involves a magical printer!" What does a printer have to do with baking a cake? Sonic better know what he's doing...
Link and Cloud went to Mario's home, to speak with Cappy, but the swordsmen duo were told to wait outside, for Mario didn't want Alm and Celica to deal with any distractions while they finished up on the appetizers. The two were enjoying a general conversation until Alm and Celica exited Mario's home, holding trays full of all sorts of appetizers.
"Will you PLEASE stop looking around and keeping looking forward?" Celica frowned at Alm, who was becoming suspicious about Berkut possibly hiding somewhere, ready to initiate a sneak attack. "Berkut is nowhere to be found, so quit your worrying!"
"That's what you think, my dearest Celica, but a man like myself knows better," responded Alm, as he and Celica continued to bicker. As the lovebirds bickered their way to the mansion, Luigi stepped out of Mario's home, surprised to see that Link and Cloud were still around...very patient folk.
"Ah, I see that-a you two chose to stick-a around...if only people did-a that at my home," Luigi said to Link and Cloud, before letting out a sigh. It wasn't easy not having guests stay for long periods of time. "So what's-a up?"
"Cloud and I saw this tiara creature inside a white box Bowser received in the mail today," explained Link, as the tiara creature in question appeared from behind Cloud, meekly approaching a now fascinated Luigi. "We were thinking that perhaps she was a friend or even sister of Cappy's. Is Mario home?"
"She sure does look-a like Cappy, what with-a the eyes...oh, and Mario, he already left-a for the mansion, since Master Hand wanted him at the big-a party. Possibly because he has been-a the..."
"Link, Cloud, Luigi, are you two busy?" Kirby approached Toon Link, looking somewhat battered and bruised. "There are two monsters dangerously close to the mansion, and Pit, Sora, nor I can stop them. I don't want to waste your time, but..."
"Beating up bad guys and monsters is never a waste of time for me," remarked Cloud, getting out his Buster Sword. Been a while since the swordsman done any fighting. "Just show us where these monsters are and we'll see what we can do." So Kirby led Cloud and company, as a man and a woman appeared on the horizon...
...Berkut and Rinea.
Kirby would show Luigi, Link, and Cloud the monsters his friend Pit and Sora were dealing with - one looked like a multi-colored alien species, while the other resembled a tall brick tower with legs. Do these descriptions sound familiar at all?
"Always knew you would come around Cloud - glad to have you fighting at my side!" Sora exclaimed to Cloud, who tried his best to tune the Keyblade wielder out. "If not for you and Link, we'd probably be goners!" And Luigi gets no love?
"Shut up, before I have to break that stupid Keyblade of yours," threatened Cloud, wondering if Sora's Keyblade was even effective at all. "So, what's the game plan, how do we stop these monsters?"
"I don't know man - we tried ever little trick in the book, but these monsters, they're one step ahead of us," said Pit. "We should definitely throw in the towel, and hug it out, maybe then the monsters will ago away." Doesn't work that way, Pit - it NEVER works that way.
Berkut: Here I am, in the premises of the Smash Mansion, about to find Alm, and challenge him a fight to the death...there will be one winner, and one loser. And the loser...shall DIE!
Rinea: Berkut, sweetie, I don't think they'll allow you to kill Alm, or anyone at all. They ARE filming, after all...
Berkut: Who gives a crap, it's not like anyone will see my senseless beating upon Alm! They'll just edit out the fight anyways. This is something personal, and whatever's personal must be finished with immediately!
"I got a weird-a feeling about these here-a monsters...let me check some-a thing out," said Luigi, as he took out two Poke Balls - a Nest Ball and a Heal Ball. The choice of Poke Balls befuddled Link, Cloud, Pit, and Kirby.
"If you think those monsters are legendary Pokemon...couldn't you at least use an Ultra Ball?" asked Link, but Luigi was apparently confident about what he was about to do. "Highly doubt you catch catch the monsters at all if they aren't in a weakened state."
"Anything can-a happen, Link...at least that's what they-a say in sports nowadays. Here goes-a nothing." So Luigi threw his Poke Balls, at the same time, at the monsters, and just as he assumed, both monsters were sent inside the Poke Balls, meaning that they were really Pokemon. But would they escape?
One...two...three...click. The two Pokemon, who were seemingly legendary, were somehow caught successfully by a Nest Ball and a Heal Ball. Luigi had a proud look on his face, as the others looked on in shock.
"If Luigi caught those two Pokemon easily...then those Pokemon might not be legendary at all," remarked Pit, clearly underestimating the power of the Nest Ball. One fateful Pokemon trainer did catch a Groundon with a Nest Ball, after all...
Witnessing Luigi catch the two presumably legendary Pokemon from the window on the fifth floor was Touma, who marveled at how successful the Pokemon catches were. Astonished, Touma had to go tell Fox and Falco what he just witnessed, and so he did just that, as he ran to the Star Records room and saw the pilots, still with the Ultra Recon Squad.
"Fox, Falco, you won't believe it!" the red-haired young man sputtered, full of excitement. "Luigi, he caught two Pokemon outside...one with a Nest Ball, and the other with a Heal Ball! At the same freaking time! The Pokemon must be legendary! How amazing is that?!"
"Excuse me, but did you say there were two Pokemon outside?" Dulse asked Touma, wondering if the two Pokemon mentioned were the Ultra Beasts he and his companions were looking for.
"Um, yeah, that's exactly what I said! It was some alien thing, and a walking tower of bricks. Very weird Pokemon, I know...but to see them catched by such crappy Poke Balls was pretty awesome!" Although Touma and the others couldn't see it, the Ultra Recon Squad members were beaming underneath their masks, after hearing Touma's descriptions.
"UB-Burst and UB-Assembly, that must be them!" A now excited Dulse approached Touma, wanting to ask him another question. "Who was the person that caught the two Pokemon? We must speak with him quickly!"
"It's a tall, lanky Italian guy named Luigi - he wears blue overalls, and has a green cap and a mustache. It would be impossible to miss him."
Once Cilan's pity party came to an end, Sonic and Tails would take Cilan to the printing room, to recreate the cake. But in the printing room, of all places? The answer to Cilan's troubles would be at the far corner of the room, where MegaMan .EXE was using the printer Zero invented in episode 15. He was using the "Materializing" feature, and with said feature, he materialized...a $100 gift card. How basic.
"This will be the perfect gift for Secret Santa," remarked .EXE, as he picked up the gift card from the paper tray. Well, on the plus side, the NetNavi saved himself from doing some Christmas shopping.
MegaMan .EXE: Gift cards are the easiest gifts you can get for just about anyone. It's such a safe bet, and you don't have to worry about hurting anyone's feelings if you got them the wrong gift. The recipient of the gift card won't feel bummed out, or even elated, they'll be like, "Oh, you got me a gift card, how nice..." Though they'll feel elated about $100. Unless they're super stingy.
"Yo .EXE, you done with that printer?" Sonic asked the NetNavi, who was holding a gift card from the Mexican restaurant Chipotle. Better not give that card to Mario. "My man Cilan needs to use it!"
"Has Cilan ever used Zero's printer before?" asked .EXE, wondering if the connoisseur even knew about the printer beforehand. "Come on over Cilan, and I'll show you how it works." So Cilan headed over to the printer, as .EXE gave him the microphone attached to it. "Basically you just say something into this microphone, and the printer will create whatever you say. Printer functions like a genie lamp, but only more technological..."
"I see...let me give it a shot, then," said Cilan, clearing his throat as he said the following: "I would like to create...the greatest, grandest cake the world has ever known!"
The party for the documentary crew had already begun, as the entire crew was in the ballroom. The two producers of Smash Life, LeVar and Brad, along with the rest of the crew, were enjoying themselves. (Must suck for the cameraman who had to film everything, and not participate.) Alm and Celica were serving the appetizers, as Master Hand watched everything taking place in the party, with Mario at his side.
"WHERE IS THAT TIARA THING?!" barked Bowser, as he entered the ballroom looking for the tiara creature. He looked to his right, and saw K.K. Slider, who was on the stage playing some party tunes, and went over to speak with him. "K.K., have you seen a flying tiara thing anywhere?" Bowser asked the hippie dog.
"Not unless I was higher than the moon and using LSDs," said K.K. Slider; since he was a hippie, doing drugs was a somewhat accepted behavior from the dog. "But I promised myself to remain sober, so I guess it'll be a no from me..."
"Stupid dog..." Seeing that K.K. was no help, Bowser walked away, and saw Zelda chilling in the back, speaking with Midna. "Zelda, have you seen a tiara creature anywhere? I know you wear tiaras yourself, so I bet you know where..."
"No, I haven't seen this tiara creature that you speak of," replied Zelda, making Bowser even more furious. "How about you, Midna?" The imp shook her head, thereby increasing Bowser's ferocity. Suddenly Bowser's phone rang...the koopa king saw that it was a call from his buddy Kamek.
"Gah, Kamek is calling my phone...had no idea wizards like him used cellphones. Learn something new every day..." Bowser hopped off the stage, as he answered the call and went to a private room.
Minutes later, Pac-Man meekly entered the ballroom, having not found any gifts for LeVar and Brad. Which meant he would be met with the furor of Master Hand. The eater of ghosts blended in with the crowd, staying aware of his surroundings, until...
"Ah, Pac-Man, you've finally returned to the ballroom!" exclaimed Master Hand, who was (in)conveniently speaking with LeVar and Brad. "But I see that you're empty-handed...where are the gifts?"
"Oh, uh, well you see, I did have some gifts, but, uh, I bought them online, and, um, they have to come in the mail, and..." stuttered Pac-Man, but Master Hand was able to see through his obvious fibbing.
"I KNOW YOU'RE LYING, YOU DIDN'T GET ANY GIFTS, DIDN'T YOU!" Master Hand had to keep his voice pretty low so he wouldn't start a scene and interrupt the party. "How else are we going to show the producers our gratitude and appreciation?"
"Um, Master Hand, I honestly don't mind not having any gifts..." LeVar spoke up, on behalf of him and Brad. "The party's just fine enough..."
"YOU AND BRAD ARE GOING TO ACCEPT GIFTS ON BEHALF OF ME, AND YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT!" When Master Hand yells in your face, you might as well listen and obey his command.
LeVar: Accepting gifts would be nice, but throwing a party for us will do just as fine. Gifts, to me, are just incentives to keep on filming the series.
Brad: But I wouldn't mind accepting any money...10K per episode would be nice. But Master Hand isn't that rich, so...
"You better find our producers some gifts, or I'll give your party planning duties to someone else!" Master Hand ordered to Pac-Man, who was now in the hot seat. Pac-Man frantically looked around, not knowing what to do, until his eyes fell upon Luigi, Link, and Cloud, who had recently entered the ballroom and speaking with Mario. Cloud brought the tiara creature to Cappy, and Cappy was sure delighted.
"Oh, Tiara, how I've longed to see you again!" exclaimed Cappy, full of joy. So the tiara creature's name was really Tiara...huh. "Thank you so much for reuniting me with my sister, Link and Cloud - I was afraid she was gone forever!"
"You oughta thank whoever delivered your sister to the mansion," replied Link, as Pac-Man stealthily tip-toed over to Luigi, who was holding his two Poke Balls. "She was in a box delivered to Bowser, and we kinda saved her before Bowser could do his usual Bowser thing."
"Bowser...how I despise that fiend. No doubt he was going to do sick things to Tiara. I know his evil intentions far too well..." As Cappy continued to rant about Bowser, Luigi suddenly looked down, and saw that his Poke Balls were missing.
"Ack, my Poke Balls have-a been stolen, but-a how?" the plumber wondered, as Pac-Man ran off with the Poke Balls in hand. He was catching his breath as he returned to Master Hand, LeVar, and Brad.
"Here are...your gifts...sorry about the hold-up..." Pac-Man gave the Poke Balls to LeVar and Brad, who reluctantly accepted their "gifts". Both men had wary looks on their faces, not knowing the Pokemon inside the balls.
"We never wanted any gifts in the first place..." said Brad, before the sound of Master Hand seething was heard. Might wanna change your words, Brad. "...I mean, much appreciated for the Poke Balls, we're HUGE Pokemon nerds, right LeVar?!" LeVar nervously nodded his head, hoping this would appease Master Hand.
"Oh, so you stole-a my Poke Balls and decided to give-a them away, huh?!" Luigi angrily marched towards Pac-Man, slightly starting a scene. "Let me tell-a you that there's legendary Pokemon in-a side those Poke Balls, therefore they can-a not be in the wrong-a hands..."
"LUIGI!" a voice called out to the plumber, grabbing his attention. It was Dulse, in the ballroom along with the Ultra Recon Squad. Dulse and his compradres would approach Luigi, needing to speak with him. "We are the Ultra Recon Squad, and we hail from Ultra Space. It has been brought to our attention that the two Ultra Beasts we're looking for - UB-Assembly and UB-Burst - have been caught by you. The Poke Balls in which the Ultra Beasts reside in are in those men's hands. So if you would please..."
"If you think our producers are going to give their well-deserved gifts to you sci-fi cosplaying punks, then think again!" boomed Master Hand, believing the Ultra Recon Squad came only to wreck the party. "So if you would please, return to your Ultra Space whatever, and cosplay all you want!"
"Oh, Master Hand, the cake is ready! It might not be much, but it's for everyone to enjoy!"
The party would be momentarily interrupted, as Mamori wheeled in her horrendous cake inside the ballroom, setting it in the center of the room. Everyone looked at the cake for a good while...before bursting into laughter, in disbelief of how bad the cake truly was. Calling it bad would be quite an understatement.
Mamori: Everyone laughed...everyone laughed at my cake...I already had low expectations anyways, so I wasn't emotionally crushed in any way.
"Mamori Minamoto, you had one job, and you absolutely blew it!" scolded Master Hand, as the laughter persisted. "How could I possibly trust you to be the head chef of the mansion? At this point, I should make Flora, the head chef..."
"Fret not, Master Hand, for I have come, with redemption! Introducing, the greatest cake ever known!"
The laughter would come to a sudden halt, as everyone looked at Cilan, who was standing near the ballroom entrance. The connoisseur would direct his arms to the ballroom doors, as they opened - with Sonic and Tails wheeling in a cake exponentially better than Mamori's. In fact, it was even better than the cake Cilan originally baked. Everyone looked at the cake, desiring the biggest slice possible.
"Cilan, did you seriously make that cake?" Master Hand astonishingly asked the connoisseur, who nodded his head with a smile. "Well I'd be...this might be your greatest culinary accomplishment. Completely makes up for your earlier faults. Seeing how your cake has everyone mesmerized, including myself...Cilan, I would like to grant you your..."
"Stop the presses, I repeat, stop the presses!" shouted a voice, as yet another person entered the ballroom and continued to stall the party. It was Berkut, and with him against her will was Rinea. "I have come to fight Alm, to the death, and give him the fatal beating he ultimately deserves!"
"Man, I was just in the middle of giving Cilan back his head chef duties!" fumed Master Hand, as Cilan grew ecstatic at the prospect of having his job back. "Why must you interrupt me, and stall this awesome party in the process?"
"I do not mean to interrupt your plans, not by any means. But Alm's blood is what I'm looking for. I've searched high and low for Alm, in this mansion, and I can only assume that he's in this ballroom. So Alm, show yourself, unless you wish to remain a coward!"
"Who are you calling a coward?" questioned Alm, as he defiantly walked away from the appetizers table, with Celica trying to hold him back. "You really want to fight me like a man, huh Berkut? Well now's your chance..." Alm held his arms out wide, like he wanted Berkut to stab him through the chest. He might be crazy, but Berkut, he wouldn't have it any other way...
"Ah, so you don't want to fight me, and instead, you wish for me to kill you without a fight...you're an even bigger coward then I have ever known." Berkut took out his lance, and held it in the air, at his side. Dangerously close to Tiara, which was worth mentioning. "If this is how you want to go out, as a graceful coward, then so be it, that's your choice. Better say your last words..."
"...yes, Kamek, I accept your apology, I accepted it like a thousand times already," said Bowser, still on the phone with Kamek, as he exited from the private room, cutting into the tension with his phone call. "All of that stuff is now under the bridge." Bowser would weave through the horde of people as he was finishing up his call. "Yes, I mean it. Okay? Good. Call you later. Bye." And with that, Bowser ended his phone call, and the first thing he saw was Berkut...
...his lance inconveniently pointed at Tiara's head, like he was planning to slay her. Bowser, perceiving this, growled at Berkut, who gulped as the koopa king was building a fury of flames in his mouth.
"Oh dear..." was all Berkut could say, as an inevitable beatdown was coming his way.
Cilan: Woo hoo, got my head chef duties back! And it was all thanks to Sonic and Tails...and that strange printer in the printing room. I dare not to think about the prospect of anyone abusing that printer, and using it to make all sorts of food, and proclaim themselves to be a great chef. By the standards of culinary experts like myself, that would account for cheating, and you know what they say about cheaters...is there even a saying for cheaters?
Pac-Man: Master Hand has given me a second chance with the party planning thing, meaning that if I screw up this time, I'm cooked. Master Hand sure is one tough cookie to please...
Dulse: Just spoke with Luigi, and he agreed to hand over the Ultra Beasts so we can return them to Ultra Space. Only thing getting in our way, however, is Master Hand refusing to give the Poke Balls up...
After being asleep for some time, Berkut suddenly woke up, and found himself in a patient room in the fitness center. The paladin, seeing he was in a patient bed, looked around, only to be greeted by a familiar face.
"About time you woke up, sleepyhead!" exclaimed Rinea, happier than usual. Berkut grunted in pain as he sat up. "You were asleep for quite a while, I thought you would never wake up!"
"What happened, where am I?" asked Berkut, who still had unfinished business with Alm. Still had yet to kill the guy.
"You got beat up and had to be taken to the fitness center, to heal your wounds. Thankfully it wasn't a serious beating, so you didn't have to go to the hospital."
"Uh huh...I don't think I'm fully healed yet, I feel some aching in my lower back. But once I'm healthy again, we shall return to Rigel, and devise a plan to kill Alm that hopefully won't involve me being in pain. Should've came more prepared."
"Yeah, about that...in order for the mansion's nurse to diagnose you and everything, she had to add you to the healthcare plan the mansion runs on, and since we're all under said plan...technically, we kinda have to live at the mansion from now on."
"WHAT?!" This was a reaction anyone would do upon learning they had to live with their arch rival. "I have to LIVE in the same building as Alm?! Will I even be permitted to kill him? Where is the fun in this..."
Finally Master Hand came around, and had LeVar and Brad give their "gifts", the Poke Balls, to Luigi, so he could give them to the Ultra Recon Squad. The squad was outside the mansion with Mario and Luigi, as Luigi held the Poke Balls containing UB-Burst and UB-Assembly.
"Here are the Ultra Beasts you came-a here for," Luigi handed the Poke Balls to Dulse, who happily accepted them. "Sorry you had to stay around-a longer than expected."
"We have finally found the Ultra Beasts, and that is what matters," said Dulse, as he summoned a wormhole - an Ultra Wormhole. "We should head back to Ultra Space, with our mission finally complete. May we all wish you the best in your future endeavors!" Mario and Luigi nodded their heads, as the Ultra Recon Squad passed through the Ultra Wormhole, the passage disappearing a moment afterwards. Luigi smiled as he looked at Mario...noticing something was amiss.
"Mario, where's-a your cap?" the plumber asked, and Mario would direct Luigi's attention to Cappy, who was near the porch bonding with his sister Tiara.
"Thought it would be best-a to give Cappy some time to catch-a up with his sis," responded Mario, as the sun began to set in the Seattle sky.
And LeVar and Brad, the Smash Life co-producers, were looking from afar, proud of the work they accomplished so far.