Author's Note:
Star Wars: The Last Jedi is released today! For those planning to watch the movie - beware of spoilers, they will ruin your day. So avoid the edgy teens on 4Chan as much as possible.
This chapter is a chapter I've been fixing to do for a very long time, ever since the summer months. It's mainly centered around Knuckles, so prepare to see Knuckles mentioned over one hundred times. (I know you were expecting a Star Wars chapter, but don't worry, I've included a Star Wars reference. Not a huge reference, but a reference nonetheless.) Now, there are two guest reviews I must answer...
"Will you include the characters from Puzzle & Dragons? Have the characters from Yo-Kai Watch appeared yet? Are Henry and Tharja going to be a couple if they appear? A small scene of Agria trying to steal Senel from Chloe? (Senel and Agria's Japanese voice actors are married in real life) And finally what are your thoughts on Breath of the Wild winning Game of the Year award?"
Probably not. Not yet. Henry and Tharja, if they appear, will be a couple. Might do the scene. And Breath of the Wild winning Game of the Year is well-deserving - that game and Odyssey were 1A and 1B in terms of the best video game this year. BOTW probably had the advantage over Odyssey by being released earlier in the year. Derick Lindsey asked a very interesting question concerning the last chapter that must be answered at once:
"...was Charles in Brian's body because Stewie kept mistaking Charles for Brian when that's something Peter would do, and where was the real Brian at? did he disappear into his subconscious when Charles came in or is he somewhere in the mansion not knowing where he is?"
To be clear, Charles straight up replaced Brian - he was there, taking his place. Brian was stuck in some indefinite space, floating around in ecstasy like Freddie Mercury, until Charles was saved. Hopefully that answers your question...
Episode 104: Triangle
Knuckles was very much in love with his woman, Rouge the Bat. The romance between the two dated back to Sonic Adventure 2, when the two lovebirds were feuding with one another - Knuckles on Sonic's side, attempting to save the world, and Rouge on Dr. Eggman's side, helping the obese mad scientist take over the world. Knuckles spent most of his adventure looking for pieces of the Master Emerald, and along the way, he would encounter Rouge...those encounters would build up to some rather interesting sexual tension between the two.
Now there were times when Rouge would throw Knuckles over the edge, and push the echidna to his limits. The bat, to this day, still stole belongings from Knuckles, from his collectible Jordan sneakers, to the Barbie doll sets that would easily make one question Knuckles' manliness. Moreover, Rouge would constantly dote on Knuckles, embarrassing him whenever the opportunity arose. Despite those things, Knuckles managed to love Rouge, through the thick and thin, even though their alignments might be somewhat different.
Knuckles was particularly giddy today, because he was informed by Rouge that the bat was giving him an early Christmas present. The echidna was dying from anticipation, so much that his heart could stop at any minute. He was waiting outside the mansion that morning, expecting Rouge's arrival, as Mario and Jacky were rolling a brand new truck into the mansion's garage.
"You're sure that Link won't notice this sparkly new car in the garage," Jacky said to Mario, as he drove the new truck into the garage. The new truck was for Link; Mario believed that the Hylian could use a bit of an improvement from his dusty old truck.
"No one-a uses the garage anyways, so it'll be all-a good," replied Mario, after Jacky parked the truck inside the garage. He would turn off the vehicle, as he and Mario got out. "I've asked several residents if this-a mansion had a garage, and they all said-a no..."
"Just because they're unaware doesn't mean that Link isn't. I'm telling you, Mario, Link will reject that truck and stick to his old one. He's become to emotionally attached to that truck now..."
Zelda: I've told Link time and time again to ditch his truck - named Epona, I might add - but he simply won't listen to me. "Epona" has accrued a lot of car problems in recent times - its gas tank keeps leaking, the tire pressure keeps running around, and it constantly makes that annoying droning noise on the road that just makes me want to scream. I'm not sure if Link is oblivious to his truck's problems, or he's just pretending like nothing is wrong, but convincing him to take that truck to the repair shop is just as hard as telling him to get rid of that metal trash heap.
Link: *standing next to Epona* Epona and I, we go back, way back...I remember renting Epona from some shady car dealership a long time ago. Thought I might need some wheels, since riding on horseback as a form of transportation is apparently taboo nowadays. When I tried to return Epona back, the guys at the dealership implored that I keep Epona, and so I did. Epona has treated me well, and I have treated her well in return... *pats Epona on the hood, causing the bumper and grilles to fall off* ...pretty sure someone unscrewed those parts.
Back to Knuckles, who was expecting Rouge to arrive at any minute. He looked high and low for the bat, but she was nowhere to be found. Was she late? Rouge was hardly ever late - she was always on time. That was her MO. Perhaps she had some unforeseen business to take care of, and it was taking her longer than expected.
Then suddenly, when Knuckles was least expecting it, a white bat, wearing a Santa hat, quietly sneaked up on Knuckles, still looking high and low for Rouge, when all of a sudden, without warning...
"BOO!" the white bat spooked Knuckles, making the echidna shriek and jump into the air. Trying to regain his manliness, Knuckles angrily turned around, and saw Rouge, smiling at him with a sly smile. "Happy holidays, my lovable red echidna!"
"I thought I told you good not to do that again!" frowned Knuckles, recalling that one time Rouge scared the non-existing pants off of him in episode 60. "Oughta be glad nobody was around to hear me scream, otherwise my reputation would've been in serious jeopardy!"
"You and your silly reputation...hmph. Always thinking you're tougher than you really are. So, how have you been? Is this cold winter weather treating you well?"
"I'm doing just great, thanks for asking. Still not used to the cold, but that's why we have ugly Christmas sweaters. Granted, I don't wear mine, since it was knitted by that pervert Yoshi. Anything that was created by that dork is automatically contagious. Now where's my gift?"
"Really are in a demanding mood, aren't you? Fine then, I'll just give you your Christmas gift now. Just know that finding this gift wasn't easy. Promise you won't open it until Christmas?" The wait was tantalizing for Knuckles, but the echidna believed that the wait was also worth it.
"Yeah, sure thing, don't open gift until Christmas day, got it." Rouge pulled out her gift for Knuckles from behind her back, and handed it to the echidna. Knuckles wanted to shake the gift, to determine what was inside, but imagined that doing so would ruin the gift. "Again, thank you for the gift, really appreciate it."
"You don't have to thank me Knuckles - it's always the thought that counts. Say, how about you show me what's new around the mansion? I'm sure a lot has happened since the last time I was here!"
Aside from Ema Skye leaving the mansion, and Layton, Luke, and the Crash clan joining the mansion, not much has happened since episode 69, the last time Rouge was present. That is, unless how want to include the whole Organization XIII thing, and Dr. Eggman's revenge tour. Knuckles wanted to introduce Rouge to the new residents, but the Crash clan was nowhere to be found at the time, and Layton and Luke were looking for Villager's missing Nintendo 3DS. So Knuckles had to wait until breakfast, where he saved a seat next to him for Rouge.
"Holiday pancakes, coming around!" announced Cilan, as he was serving everyone a handful of Christmas-themed pancakes. The pancakes resembled reindeer, snowmen, gingerbread men, and even Santa Claus. Cilan made sure everyone had pancakes, regardless if anyone wanted any or not.
"Hey Cilan, how come Dr. Cortex over here gets a black Santa Claus pancake, while I on the other hand am stuck with some generic white one?" complained Doc Louis, who found a bizarre way to make a race issue out of simple holiday pancakes. "How could you do that man, how can you let down a black man like myself?!"
"Cortex's pancake must've been severely burned, left it cooking for too long." As Cilan said this, Cortex looked at his pancake, with a disgusted look on his face, before tossing his pancake on the floor for the Duck Hunt Dog to consume it. The mutt, after chewing the pancake, spat it out immediately.
Cortex: Cilan would give be a burnt pancake...bet you he did it on purpose! The disrespect is real, it's out of this world! Doc Louis can go all he want about being disrespected, but he wouldn't know about being disrespected unless he took a walk in my shoes!
While everyone was eating, Mario stepped inside the dining room, clearing his throat to grab everyone's attention. The residents all looked at the plumber, wondering what occasion brought him to the mansion.
"Good-a morning everyone," greeted Mario, expecting a collective "good morning" from the crowd, but got nothing instead. Clearly the residents weren't about that life. Some more than others. "Someone has visited-a my home today, and shared with-a me some important information. I thought it would-a be best if he shared-a this information with all-a of you, and now, he is here-a to make an important announcement. I will-a now give him the floor."
So Mario stepped out of the way, as a black-and-red hedgehog entered the dining room, increasing the curiosity in the dining room. The hedgehog, considered edgy by most edgy standards, was ready to make his announcement. His announcement involved something he had never done before in his life, nor cared to do. And now, the mansion residents were ready to hear it. But first, an introduction...
"My name...my name is Shadow...Shadow the Hedgehog," Shadow introduced himself to the residents, who already knew who Shadow was. Wasn't like Shadow was some lousy Sonic original character created on Deviantart that came to life. "And I have an important announcement to..."
"Dude, Shadow, why do you always have to do this, man?" Sonic interrupted his rival, shaking his head with disbelief on his face. "You didn't have to introduce yourself, we already know who you are! What, you think we all got amnesia? Get on with it, man!"
"I was getting on with it, for your information Sonic..." Shadow cleared his throat, before continuing where he left off. "Anyways, before I was so rudely interrupted, by peons such as Sonic...I have an important announcement to make. Believe it or not, I'll be going on my first date two days from now, and I'll be going on a date...with Rouge the Bat."
At first, the residents were baffled by Shadow going on a date at all. Shadow was far and away from your ideal romantic type - even Samus was more romantic than Shadow ever could be. Had more sexual tension with Anthony Higgs than Shadow had with anyone. But for Shadow, to go on a date with Rouge, whom he has worked with time and time again? Rouge, who was in a relationship already with Knuckles. There was a lot of chit chat taking place in the dining room, as Rouge sheepishly sneaked away, unbeknownst to Knuckles, who was now looking for his woman.
Shadow: I would say that I'm excited to go on my first date, but I'm not the one to be excited about anything. I've rarely felt excitement, or any positive emotion for that matter, ever since Maria died. Positivity, to me, is just a falsehood people claim they have to fool themselves into thinking that they're content with their lives.
Wario: *laughs hysterically* Shadow, going on a date? Is he on crack, is he living in la la land?
Robin: Shadow's giong on his first date, and I've yet to go on a date with Lucina...I personally blame Chrom for getting in my way.
Tails: Shadow must not be aware of the fact that Rouge is in a relationship with Knuckles, it seems like. Shadow probably won't know about said relationship until Knuckles and Rouge get married, and have half-bat, half-echidna kids with bat ears and wings and claws used for digging...but I feel extremely bad about this.
"But Shadow, how could your date with Rouge be your first date, when you went on date before with Dixie Kong?" asked Yoshi, the matchmaker who put that oddball date together, as the chatter continued
"That date you speak of does not count...it was only a product of your disgusting shipping ways," replied Shadow, pointing at Yoshi with force because he felt like pointing. Just for the theatrics. "You're just like those chicks on Tumblr who put me in questionable and head-scratching pairings, and draw inappropriate fan art of me that would be shunned by any rational person."
"You don't know what you're talking about..." murmured Yoshi...sneakily drawing a picture of Shadow underneath the table when nobody was looking, and smiling at it creepily as he was drawing. The dinosaur might've picked up another annoying hobby.
"I hear all this chatter, so I must assume that you're pretty much fine with my date, and whom I'm going on a date with." The chatter slowly began to die down, as Knuckles left the dining room to go look for Rouge. "No negative feelings or viewpoints whatsoever?"
"No negative stuff at all, Shadow!" smiled Pac-Man, raising a thumbs up. Most of the chatter was questioning how Shadow was even on a date, and how he ended up going on said date with Rouge of all people. The two did have a long history, but still. "You're the man, Shadow! On top of the world!"
"Hmph. Don't know why I bothered asking that in the first place. I could care less about how you fools think. I just wanted to see how you would react, that's all. Since, you know, you all think I'm just some loser emo hedgehog, forever destined to lament about my life and origins forever."
"We would never say those things about you Shadow, right guys?" Rosalina said before asking her fellow residents; some of them nodded their heads, albeit out of nervousness. Didn't want Shadow to go full Chaos Control on them. "May we all wish you the best on your first date!"
"That would mean a lot, coming from you Rosalina...but I never cared about you to begin with." Ouch, gotta wonder how Rosalina felt about that. "Same could be said for many others in this room. Now that I got that out of the way, I must return home..."
"...or you could spend the rest of your day with us, in the mansion!" exclaimed Sonic, getting out of his seat as he ran to Shadow. "Hey, Villager, could you, uh, show Shadow your new...your new...sea bass?"
"I'd be more than glad to do that!" obliged Villager, sliding his plate of pancakes to King Dedede (who was breathing intensely with joyous feelings) as he hopped out of his chair and escorted Shadow away. With Shadow gone, Sonic went over to Mario, so he could speak with the plumber in private. "Your place, now..."
So Mario took Sonic to his home, but not before Knuckles came along to. Knuckles, who was still looking for Rouge when Sonic approached him, was bewildered by the idea of Shadow going on a date with his woman, and wanted to know how the date came to fruition.
"How can Shadow possibly not-a know about Rouge being in love with-a Knuckles?" Mario asked Sonic and Knuckles, the three in the living room. To say the plumber was left perplexed by the whole situation would be an understatement. "I assumed Rouge was done-a with Knuckles when Shadow told-a me about the date."
"Quite frankly I have no idea - I thought Shadow would pick up all the context clues about the relationship, but I guess the guy's more aloof than we thought he was!" responded Sonic. Shadow was always deep in thought most of the time, so you can't really fault the man for his lack of awareness. "Still curious as to how this date came to be..."
"You know-a what, we can't let this linger on-a anymore. I'm gonna tell-a Shadow!" Mario got up from his couch, and was about to make his way to the door, only to be stopped by Knuckles.
"No, Mario, you can't outright tell Shadow about my relationship with Rouge, he would kill you!" Knuckles said to the plumber, stressing how dangerous Shadow was. One deadly Chaos Control and you could very well be a goner. "Shadow, as you know, is the one of the easiest people to get angry fast, and if he finds out the truth, then he would get angry, and take out his anger on you. Don't put yourself in harm's way!"
"But he has-a to know some-a how! If I can't tell-a Shadow, then who-a should?"
"Why not give the honors to the person who's going on the date with Shadow...Rouge the Bat?" suggested Peach, who was in the kitchen eavesdropping on the conversation between Mario, Sonic, and Knuckles. The three looked at Peach, then at each other, taking the princess' idea into consideration.
Peach: A woman always knows what's best for a man...and I think that having Rouge settle the issue would be best for everyone involved. Shadow can come to a clear understanding, and Knuckles and Rouge can keep their romance alive. Moreover, nobody has to worry anyone dying! Not that often in life you come across romantic disputes where someone's life could be in danger, but when you add Shadow to the equation, things can be...rather tense.
"That would be our-a safest bet...what do you boys-a think?" Mario asked Sonic and Knuckles, mulling Peach's suggestion. Would be better than having Mario thrown into the wolves, and paying the price.
After breakfast was over, Corrin and Kamui went to the gaming room, to try out some Christmas cookies Cilan baked. The connoisseur left his cookie creations in the gaming room for everyone to enjoy, for he imagined that the gaming room was the right venue. As Corrinwas eating the cookies, he saw Doc Louis, seated in a chair by himself, eating cookies as well. He was wearing a Santa hat, attached with a white beard, and with Doc's red sports jacket on, Corrin somehow mistook the boxing trainer for someone else...
"Santa Claus!" the prince of Nohr exclaimed, jumping into the lap of Doc Louis. The boxing trainer was understandably confused, dropping his cookies unto the floor as he looked at Corrin. "May I tell you the things I want for Christmas?"
"Boy what on earth is wrong with you, have you lost your doggone mind?!" Doc Louis snapped on Corrin, trying to get the prince off his lap but to no avail. It was a good thing nobody was paying attention...yet. "I'll give you a count of ten to get off my lap, and if ya don't, then I'm gonna bring my man Little Mac to whoop your behind before you can cry uncle!"
"For Christmas, I want a new lightsaber, a dark cloak like the one Emperor Palpatine wears, some Star Wars posters, an R2D2 replica, a C-3P0 costume..." Corrin kept going on and on with his list, and Doc Louis was getting very annoyed by the second.
"So all you want is just some Star Wars stuff? Where's the variety, man? Why not ask for new boxers, new clothes, new video games, or even a new girlfriend! Oh wait, you already have a girlfriend...boy do I feel sorry for her!"
"Um, Doc Louis...what are you doing with Corrin?" a concerned Leia asked the boxing trainer, standing with Little Mac. Little Mac felt too embarrassed for his Doc Louis to have a say in the matter. "Are you trying to be Santa? I do believe there's a mall downtown that you can do stuff like that..."
"Corrin and I, we were just playing, that's all it was." Doc Louis aggressively shoved Corrin off his lap - something the boxing trainer should've done earlier. Corrin got up to his feet, as Kamui came over to take her twin brother away.
"The things you do Corrin, the things you do..." Kamui sighed as she led Corrin away from Doc Louis. Pit and Kirby were watching from afar, and they couldn't help but laugh at the whole situation. Pit, who used to believe in Santa Claus, was laughing the hardest.
"Heh, I remember the days when I thought Santa Claus was real...oh how those days have gone by," remarked the angel, as he and Kirby were sipping some good ol' egg nog. The official beverage of the holidays, much like how beer was the official beverage of the NFL and unadulterated college life. "It'll be only a matter of time until Corrin wises up."
Pit: When Cloud told me last year that Santa Claus was real, and just some holiday figure created to amuse little kids, I refused to believe him. I was so hurt by Cloud's comments, that I spent the entire day in my room crying, with the laughing of Dark Pit soothing my soul. But now, I have seen the light, the light that shines brightly, and I have moved on from my childish ways and accepted the reality that Santa was exactly what he was, a holiday figure for children.
Kirby: And to think, that all it took was for Sonic to dress up a Dr. Eggman robot as Santa, and pose as Santa to show you the truth...
Pit: Wait, so does that mean Dr. Eggman is Santa Claus? No wonder the idea of Santa Claus being real is so untrue, who would ever believe that Dr. Eggman is Santa?! Dr. Eggman can't even get a woman, for crying out loud! Isn't Santa supposed to be married, to Mrs. Claus? Also, can Dr. Eggman even go down a chimney? I bet he can't even go through the front door of his own house! (If he even owns a house, that is.) It's no wonder he entered the mansion by crashing through the roof in his Egg Mobile!
Snooping around through the gaming room was Rouge, who had left during breakfast on early notice. Ever since the news about Shadow going on a date broke out, Rouge had left the dining room, likely to escape from her man Knuckles. She had to keep a low profile, knowing that not showing herself would make her suspicious in the eyes of her boyfriend.
"I'm about low on egg nog, what about you Kirby?" Pit asked the pink puffball, who held up his cup. Almost empty, with just a few drops of egg nog at the bottom. "Let's go back to the kitchen and ask Lady Palutena for some more nog." So Pit and Kirby got up and went to the exit, only to unexpectedly run into Rouge. "Oh, hi Rouge! I wanted to say hi to you during breakfast, but you left before I could do so. Merry Christmas, and Feliz Cumpleanos! Or is it Feliz Navidad? Eh, I'll just ask Meta Knight later which one it is."
"It's definitely Feliz Navidad...and Merry Christmas to you too, Pit," replied Rouge, before looking around. "Same goes to your friend Kirby. Now if you excuse me, I have to get going...trying to keep away from someone. Can't tell you who it is though, might break my cover!"
"Before you do that, I have to ask you one important question...are you a vampire?" This interesting question led to a look of confusion from Rouge, and even Kirby as well. Too bad Pit was being serious. "Only asking this because there's these species, called vampire bats, and they have sharp teeth and suck up blood...not that you have sharp teeth or blood-sucking abilities or anything, but most vampires I've seen on TV can turn into vampire bats, and you're a bat, so I was wondering if..."
"Well, Pit, if I'm truly a vampire...then you must be the next Albert Einstein. I'll just let you figure that out while I keep doing my thing. The world could use a few more Einsteins!" Pit was left deep in thought, as Rouge pinched him on the cheek and walked away. The bat wouldn't get that far until Pit broke away from his trance of thought, as another question was generated inside his head.
"Hold up Rouge, before you go, got another question to ask you..." Rouge rolled her eyes, as she turned around to face Pit. If it was another question about her being a vampire bat, then Rouge was going to sucker punch Pit in the face. A well deserving sucker punch, too. "During breakfast, Shadow announced that he was going on a date...a date with you. What do you have to say about that." If Pit was expecting a direct answer from Rouge, then he better be ready to be disappointed...
"I have no comment on the matter," was Rouge's reply as she walked away from Pit and Kirby, leaving with Pit more questions than answers.
To keep Shadow at bay, Sonic had Villager show the edgy hedgehog his new sea bass. Little did Sonic know that Villager had captured multiple sea bass, and the youngster was waiting for the day someone wanted to see them. Unfortunately for Shadow, he had to be that someone, as he was in Villager's room, forcing himself to view Villager's sea bass collection.
"...and this is the golden snapper sea bass, a species native to the eastern Pacific Ocean along the coast of Ecuador," Villager was showing off this sea bass to Shadow, who had drooping eyelids as he was resting his chin on the palm of his hand. The hedgehog was doing his best to look alive, albeit feeling bored out of his mind. "Caught this bad boy on a fishing trip with Red, when we used the teleportation device to go to Mexico. I also caught this Basculin, which I kept in a fish tank." Villager went into his closet, and pulled out a fish tank containing a shiny Basculin, in its red-striped form. "Say, Shadow, do you have a favorite type of sea bass?"
"My favorite type of sea bass is suicide..." moaned Shadow, wishing he had a gun in his hand right now. He was at the point where shooting himself in the head was the only option he had, to rid himself of Villager.
"Wow, never heard of that kind of sea bass before! I should check it out online, do some research on it! Always knew you were into fishing, Shadow!"
Shadow: Told Villager I had to use the bathroom - don't think I can use that excuse on him again - and now that I'm away from that dork, there's something I have to get off my chest...Villager is one of the most annoying human beings I had to endure, provided that Villager is even human. Might be a monster or demon in a human disguise. I've never heard a person who loved fishing and fish in general as much as Villager - not even Big the Cat loved fishing that much! Just hearing Villager talking about his stupid sea bass collection just makes me want to take his spoon hands and beat him to death with his own hands, until he bleeds and begs for mercy, until he begs no more.
Spying on Shadow through the crack of Villager's door was Sonic, peeking through. Cloud walked by, and saw the two blue blur in the act of spying, and he could only shake his head and sigh.
"First it was Link, then it was Mario...and now it's you, Sonic," remarked the swordsman, grabbing Sonic's attention. "Do you not know the trouble that can come with spying on someone? At least you aren't spying on a potential couple, so I'll give you points for that."
"Shh, you'll blow my cover Cloud!" Sonic shushed the swordsman, before he returned to spying. "Go away and make out with Aerith or something, you're distracting me from spying on Shadow!" Cloud remained where he was, wanting to know Sonic's intentions.
"Why are you spying on Shadow for, it's not like he's the most interesting guy on the planet." Same could possibly be said about you, Mr. Strife - talk about the pot calling the kettle black. "I'm sure you have more important things to do than spying on your friend...or rival. Or whatever."
"I'm just checking to make sure Villager is doing his job." Villager was doing his job well - poor Shadow was growing more and more bored, as Villager kept rambling on about how huge his sea bass collection was. "Gotta keep Shadow away from Knuckles, to avoid any conflict. Especially after he announced that date he has with Rouge."
"If you truly want to avoid conflict...then how about you have Knuckles and Rouge talk things out themselves? Then they can come up of a way to address their relationship to Shadow, and let bygones by bygones...unless, perhaps, Rouge was cheating on Knuckles with Shadow."
Sonic dared not to entertain the idea that Rouge was cheating on Knuckles. Knuckles wasn't the kind of guy that deserved to be cheated on - he was a stand-up guy who deserved a loving, caring girlfriend. And for Rouge, to cheat on Knuckles, with an edgelord like Shadow - an edgelord who internally quipped about how sucky his life was, and questioning his origins - Knuckles deserved better. But Sonic thought that it wouldn't hurt for Rouge and Knuckles to come together, talk things out, and come to a better understanding about things.
"You might be on to something, Mr. Strife..." Sonic stroked his chin in thought, before making up his mind entirely. "I shall bring Knuckles over from Mario's place to the mansion, and have him talk with Rouge, so they can be on the same page. Any idea where Rouge might be?"
"Last saw her hanging around near the printing room. She might be hiding from Knuckles and/or Shadow. Just tell me where you want Knuckles and Rouge to meet, and I'll try and set things up."
With Cloud finding Rouge near the printing room, and Sonic bringing Knuckles to the mansion from Mario's home, Rouge and Knuckles met in an empty room, door locked, with no one inside but Rouge, Knuckles, and a noisy cameraman ready to record the juicy conversation. Time for the cameraman to get his big payday!
"You HAVE to tell Shadow about us, he has to know or else," Knuckles stressed to Rouge, who had her arms folded with a smile. The severity of the situation did not seem to mean much to her, or at least that's how Knuckles felt.
"Or else what?" questioned Rouge, leaning in towards Knuckles who backed away. Bit too close for comfort. "Me, telling Shadow, about us as an item? Sounds like a horrid idea...have you forgotten how Shadow operates?"
"It would only be better if you told him the truth instead of me. Gotta get it over with, before things start to get out of hand!"
"What difference would it make if I told Shadow, and you didn't? It's just the same information being passed from one individual to another, so why does it matter about who tells Shadow what? Insecure much?"
"Whoever said I was insecure...so do you truly love, are you cheating on me with Shadow? Is that what this is all about? Tell me the truth, girl - tell me how much you love me!"
"I have told you numerous times before that I love you, even all those times when you forced me to say it. Want me to say 'I love you' one more time, just so you won't get your feelings hurt? Why does saying those three words now in this instance be any different from all the other times?"
"Because you're going on a date with Shadow."
No longer interested in the conversation slowly backed away, her smile fading, as she reached the door. She opened the door, and exited the room, closing the door behind her and leaving Knuckles alone with the anonymous cameraman. Said cameraman was gonna get his due very soon.
Sonic: There's this old saying, from Texas...or maybe it's from Tennessee...or from Texas...George W. Bush used the saying before, so he might know more about the origins than I do. The saying goes along the lines of "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice...can't fool me again...shame on you...something about peace sign...loading choppers...letting it rain"...something like that. I think that famous saying can be applied to the, dare I say it, love triangle between Knuckles, Rouge, and Shadow.
Knuckles: Welp, what else can I say... *shrugs * ...hoes ain't loyal.
Following his meeting with Rouge, Knuckles would return to Mario's home with Sonic, where Mario was in the living room expecting the two friends to return. He saw that Knuckles had a disgruntled look on his face when he entered his home, making him curious.
"So, how did-a things go between you and-a Rouge?" Mario asked Knuckles, who plopped on the plumber's couch. The disgruntled look was still there.
"I asked Rouge to tell Shadow about us being a couple, but I don't think she agreed to the terms," explained Knuckles, before heaving a sigh. "Don't think she's ready yet to tell him the truth...probably just as nervous as I am! Usually am not afraid of anyone or anything, but..."
"Obviously we can't let-a this thing continue any longer, gotta put an end-a to it some-a how." As Mario was speaking, Lara came out from her room, overhearing the conversation and listening attentively. "Shadow has a straight-a up anger problem - telling him now would be much-a better than telling him at a later time!"
"What on earth are you three talking about?" asked Lara, as she went into the kitchen to grab a bite to eat. "I've heard you three speaking earlier...what seems to be the issue?"
"Knuckles just learned that his girlfriend Rouge is going on a date with Shadow the Hedgehog, and we're trying to figure out a way to tell Shadow what's up," Sonic explained to Lara, as Lara grabbed an apple and took a bite out of it. "Knuckles wants Rouge to tell Shadow, but Rouge was all like 'heck no', and now, we're kinda stuck at the moment..."
"I have a bit of a suggestion..." Lara took a seat in the living room, ready to offer her two cents. "...how about we have Mario address Knuckles' relationship with Rouge to Shadow?" Mario gave Lara a crazy look - was the woman out of her mind?! "You used to be the man of the Smash Mansion, were you not, Mario? You have dealt with many disputes before, most of the time without needing any input from Master Hand. Not to mention that you have dealt with several explosive individuals...and Shadow, well, he's as explosive as they come. So Mario, what could possibly hold you back?"
"Nothing, really, there's no outside-a force that would prevent-a me from..." started Mario, before a thousand mile stare appeared on his face when he started to realize how much he had to do with the whole love triangle thing.
It was his idea to have Shadow inform the residents about his date, which in turn caused things to escalate. Had he just told Shadow upfront about Knuckles and Rouge being a couple, none of this would have happen. Now would be a great time to mend an error of his ways, before things further escalated.
"You know-a what, Lara...maybe I should speak-a with Shadow, and tell-a him the truth," said Mario, standing up proudly with a proud smile. Better do it now than never.
Shadow was legitimately done with Villager - the spoon hand youngster had just finished going over his sea bass collection with the hedgehog, and was about to do it again since he had nothing better to do. When Mario showed up at Villager's room and asked for Shadow, it was like an angel was sent down from heaven, rescuing Shadow from his misery. Mario was tasked with telling Shadow the truth about Rouge and Knuckles, and he had to do it now, or forever hold his breath and further allow things to go out of hand.
Before Mario went to Shadow, however, the plumber was approached by Master Hand, who was hyping up his Christmas concert around town. The concert was set to begin next week, and he was telling Mario all the details he needed to know. He also asked Mario to come to the lecture hall, so he could show him the progress that has been made in regards to the concert.
Master Hand: I have high hopes for my Christmas concert, and I certainly think that it will be the talk of the town for years to come. It'll have everything you want in a Christmas concert and more - a special appearance by Santa Claus, the Duck Hunt Dog dressed up as Rudolph, some niche Christmas decor and props, excellent performance from the singers, Knuckles rapping that DMX holiday song, and even a surprise appearance from the Trans-Siberian Orchestra! I've tried calling the orchestra's manager on the phone and asking him for a gig at the mansion, but he has never returned my calls...perhaps my death threats aren't that threatening enough. Talking trash about his mom, now that should grab the manager's attention!
Kiria: Would I love to do a Christmas concert? Of course, holiday-themed concerts are always fun. Would I love to do a Christmas concert organized by Master Hand? Not in a million freaking years. Unfortunately, since I'm employed with Star Records, I'm left with no choice in the matter, and have no choice but to perform at the concert. As long as DJ Octavio isn't going to be there...Master Hand selected Octavio to be the DJ? Ugh...
Mario and Shadow were in the lecture hall, sitting at front row, checking out Roy and Ike setting up props on the stage. Several Christmas trees were lined up in the back, an inflatable snowman was on the far side of the stage, and there was also fake snow littered on the stage, provided by Ike. Coco was on the light deck, checking out the stage lights, with Crash and Aku on the deck as well.
"COWABUNGA!" shouted Crash, shouting out a new word in his lexicon, as he leaped off of the light deck and onto the inflatable snowman. The snowman slowly deflated as Crash was on top of it, and it kept deflating until there was no more air inside of it. That poor inflatable snowman had a family!
"Dang it Crash, how times do we have to tell you, don't dive off from the light deck like that!" Ike scolded the bandicoot, who whimpered at the sight of Ike's angry and agitated face. "Why does it always have to be the inflatable snowman...yo, Mario, can you help Roy and I inflate this snowman?"
"One-a moment, Ike," Mario told the swordsman, before turning his attention to Shadow. "I brought you here to this-a lecture hall, because...because I have to tell-a you something important. Bear in mind that when-a I say these things...which are bad-a things...it's things that I, if I were-a you, wouldn't want-a to hear..."
"You're not making any sense, Mario," said Shadow, confused by what Mario was trying to say. Mario was starting to look like he wasn't up for the challenge. "What are these things that you speak of?"
"Well, I'm-a not...very articulate today, so I'll just, tell you what-a you need to hear another time. When-a ever that time comes." Ike was standing on the stage, arms folded, foot tapping impatiently. Mario was taking an awfully long time to spit out the truth.
"Today would really be nice, you know, Mario - that inflatable snowman isn't gonna inflate itself," frowned Roy. A self-inflating snowman would be very inconvenient, yet expensive at the same time. Would make for a huge profit.
"And with-a that, I am off!" Mario rose up out of his seat, adjusting his cap. "Gonna inflate-a this snowman, before Ike gets-a angry at me and kills-a me with his sword. Granted, Ike would never kill-a me, but I always-a know a secret serial killer when-a I see one..." Name one then, dude.
"So you're not going to tell me this important thing that you have to tell me so? You're telling me that you essentially brought me here for nothing? Villager already wasted my time so far today, don't tell me you're doing the same thing too..."
Mario, with his fists clenched, looked down at the floor through his closed eyelids with his fists clenched. Shadow was demanding to know the truth, and whatever you ask for, you shall receive...
"Knuckles and Rouge...they're in-a love, they're a couple," Mario reluctantly told Shadow, who eyes grew wider than the sun. "They've practically been in-a love for a very long-a time, longer than you can-a imagine. That's the news I wanted-a to share with you."
"Are you for real, they really are a couple?" asked an astonished Shadow; apparently he did not know about Knuckles and Rouge being together all along. Too busy brooding about his horrible life.
"As real-a as the rain out-a side..." Having gotten this crucial information off his chest, Mario joined Roy and Ike upstage to help them inflate the snowman, as a ticked off Shadow left the lecture hall. Here we go...
Wii Fit Trainer: Here at the Smash Mansion, we have this romantic, yet strange tradition of hanging up the mistletoe on random doors. If any two people are under a door with the mistletoe, they have to kiss one another. Master Hand enforced this tradition because he thought it was super funny. Being under a mistletoe can lead to some very humorous situations...
Having finished another intense winter workout, Wii Fit Trainer would exit the fitness center, wiping the sweat off her forehead with a towel. She was standing at the doorway when King K. Rool was about to enter...and would you know it, a mistletoe was hanging above the two of them. Both individuals saw said mistletoe, Rool was smiling like a pervert, whereas Wii Fit never felt more concerned for her life until now.
"Heh heh heh, don't mind if I do..." smiled Rool, getting out his breath spray and spaying into his mouth, before puckering his lips for Wii Fit...only for the fitness trainer to slap the Kremling silly. An A for effort, right?
"Go kiss that inflatable doll of Princess Peach you have hanging up in your room instead," Wii Fit would tell Rool, before walking away. Rool rubbed the spot where Wii Fit slapped him, as he entered the fitness center. Moments later, Wolf would leave the fitness center, as Link was about to enter therein...soon enough, both men were standing below the mistletoe, which they both noticed, and were left in a parlous situation.
"Well, uh...this is awkward," remarked Link, as he and Wolf looked at each other awkwardly. After several seconds of awkwardness, both Link and Wolf awkwardly hugged each other, putting their crowning moment of awkward to an end, as they awkwardly went their separate ways. Thankfully nobody was there to witness such awkwardness...
...unless you were Rouge, who was close by. The bat was snooping around the fitness center, looking around and analyzing her surroundings, as she stepped foot inside the fitness center. Suddenly, a hand grabbed her shoulder, and pulled her around...it was Shadow! A ticked Shadow, that was.
"Why hello there, lover boy," smirked Rouge, as Shadow remained steadfast with his angry look. "Look up...we're standing below the mistletoe! How about a kiss?" Shadow wasn't looking for a kiss - he was looking for some clarification.
"Come with me..." the hedgehog took Rouge's hand, and led away from the fitness center to a place where he and Rouge could speak private. He held Rouge against the wall, and had his hands on his shoulders, showing some lowkey signs of a typical abusive boyfriend. "Is it true, are you and Knuckles a couple? Are you truly in love with that echidna?"
"Shadow, have you forgotten about your date?" questioned Rouge, as she lifted Shadow's hands off her shoulders while smiling. "We're both aware of the location, the time, and everything else that had to be taken care of. Always trying to start things, I swear..."
"Just answer my question, dang it...are you and Knuckles a couple? Answer my question, and I'll let you go!"
"Okay, fine, I'll fess up...Knuckles and I are indeed a couple. Happy now?" Just what Shadow needed to hear, as he took his hands off of Rouge. So far, so good.
"How long were you and Knuckles together?" was Shadow's next question. What the hedgehog wished to know next was how long Knuckles and Rouge were together. Had to know every little detail.
"I don't know exactly how long we've been together. We've had our ups and downs, our pros and cons...from the romantic rap song Knuckles dedicated to me, to that time he totaled my new motorcycle. There were some things we did together, like the time we paralyzed Robin for screwing around with Marth. And there were times we were at odds, but reconciled and reaffirmed our love. Our relationship, it can be rocky at times, but close-knit other times."
"Is everyone at the mansion fully aware of this relationship?" That was the third question Shadow had for Rouge, who nodded her head. "Grrr..." Maybe Shadow shouldn't have asked that, for it only made him even angrier than before.
Rouge: I told Knuckles what he needed to know, and I told Shadow what he needed to know. Hopefully those two can hug it out, and move on from this whole issue like responsible adults. *giggles to herself* Oh, who am I kidding?
The decoration and whatnot in the lecture hall was done, as all the props and decor were in their proper place, and the inflatable snowman was back to proper inflation. Mario stood with Fox and Falco, as they analyzed the work done. Master Hand had left some time ago to pay Crazy Hand a visit, so Fox and Falco had to wait for the giant hand to return so they could ask for his approval of the stage design.
"Master Hand apparently wants the stage to stay as it is until the concert, so nobody is allowed in the lecture hall except for us and the idol singers," Fox explained to Mario, amazed by the work done by Roy and Ike. "Idol singers can only use the lecture hall for rehearsing, so if they do anything else, like playing cards or texting on their phone, then they're kicked out of the concert program."
"The play is still on the table; Master Hand is still doing casting as we speak," added Falco, in a wary tone. "He had penciled in Snake earlier to play as Ebeneezer Scrooge..." Doesn't sound like a bad choice - Snake's old-man look and craggy nature made him a perfect choice for Ebeneezer Scrooge. "...and just the other day, he cast Donkey Kong to play as Frosty the Snowman." By the sound of it, Master Hand's play was all over the place. First Rudolph, then Ebeneezer, and now Frosty! Who was next, the Grinch?! "Oh, and he asked Cilan to play as the Grinch. You know Cilan accepted that casting role in a heartbeat."
"Cilan does-a have a flair for the theatrics, so I could see-a him taking his Grinch-a role to a whole other level," remarked Mario, interested in seeing Cilan's acting debut, as well as the acting debuts of some others. Master Hand had extremely high hopes for his concert/play, as he does for most other events he has going on at the mansion.
Suddenly, Fox, Falco, and Mario heard someone talking on the phone, which was coming from backstage. This greatly concerned Fox and Falco - not only because the person talking on the phone could be an idol singer who only came to lecture hall just to call somebody, and that was against the rules - Master Hand's rules, that is.
Wanting to get down to the bottom of things, Mario and company headed backstage, and saw Captain Falcon, speaking on the phone with...any idea who it was? Olivia. This has been a common occurrence since Falcon and Olivia first met.
"Oh yeah, next week is gonna be THE BOMB!" exclaimed Captain Falcon, feeling more jovial than before, as Mario, Fox, and Falco watched conspicuously. "And I want you to be there! It's gonna be a great day, yes it will be!"
"Are you sure you're ready for it, Captain Falcon?" asked Olivia, as Mario inched closer to Captain Falcon; Fox and Falco had to hold the plumber back. "I can hear the excitement from the other end of the phone! You sure it's a big secret?"
"You're darn right it is, you can bet your Probopass it's gonna blow your socks off! I made sure my man Itsuki is gonna make it one of the best days of my life...and someone's else life as well! Can't tell you who it is - it would ruin the secret!"
"Okay, Falcon, whatever makes you happy - just don't pass out from over-excitement, mmkay?" The inclusion of Itsuki in whatever Captain Falcon had planned made things more intriguing...
Captain Falcon: Ugh, you people keep getting on my nerves! I am NOT in love with Olivia, okay?! You people are just like TMZ, asking me random questions that I don't care to answer, and trying to bring forth pain and suffering into my life and the lives of others! Only difference is that you aren't thirsty for juicy information, and you don't have to follow broads around to be relevant.
As Captain Falcon kept talking on thep hone, Mario and company pulled away from backstage, having seen enough. Whatever Captain Falcon was planning, and the things he was talking about, it sounded like he had something big planned for Olivia...but what?
"I think Captain Falcon might be going for it, he's going to propose to Olivia," theorized Fox, with a finger placed underneath his chin. "Falcon and Olivia, they've been talking on the phone more and more now, and I think they might be growing on each other...to the point where Falcon might leave Nowi behind in the dust, forever. Falcon proposing to a woman after just talking with her on the phone is a very Falcon thing to do, what with how desperate Falcon has become upon being an ex-boyfriend. I suspect Itsuki might be organizing this marriage proposal."
"How about-a we bring Itsuki over here, and ask what's-a going on?" suggested Mario, who hated that he had to involve himself in yet another romantic subplot. At least this subplot was more moderate in nature. "Any idea where Itsuki might-a be?"
"He should be in the meeting room, doing casting and line rehearsal with some of the others," replied Falco. "I'm sure he wouldn't mind taking a little break..."
At the meeting room, Itsuki was in the meeting room, going over some of the lines for Master Hand's mix-match play with the residents participating (or being forced to participate) in the play. Everything was going smoothly, until Shadow barged inside the meeting room, on the hunt for someone.
"Where is Knuckles, tell me where he is NOW!" demanded the hedgehog, as everyone looked at him all puzzled. Itsuki just stared at Shadow with a dumbfounded look on his face.
"Shadow this is the first time I've seen you this angry...must be a good thing," remarked Itsuki, ensuring that he was a safe distance away from Shadow. "You feeling okay, man?"
"No. Not at all, actually. But thanks for asking. Appreciate it, I really do. You know what? I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for withholding important details from me, for making me look like an ignorant fool!"
"Well then consider yourself more than welcome," replied Snake, scratching his scraggly beard. Was growing thicker and grayer by the second; Snake should invest in some shaving cream. "That's your problem, buddy, not ours..."
Just then, someone entered the meeting room, unexpectedly bumping into Shadow. Unwritten Rule #35: NEVER bump into Shadow, and expect to get away with it. Shadow angrily turned around, and was suddenly greeted by the guy he was busy looking for.
"Knuckles..." seethed Shadow, allowing the indignation and fury inside of him to build up and boil over at any minute.
"Shadow..." seethed Knuckles, finally face-to-face with his nemesis for the first time today as he had his...erm, knuckles, ready to fight.
"It's over now Knuckles, your time is up..."
"Ah, so I take it you called off the date. Good choice."
"No, it's over between you two. You and Rouge."
"Nope, no way, ain't gonna happen. I'm not giving up."
"But you have to."
"No way Jose."
"She doesn't love you, don't you understand?! She loves me more!"
"Then you need to get your facts straight buster, because she certainly enjoys being with me more than she enjoys being with you!"
"Shadow and Rouge...that is what's meant to be, and you know it."
"Nope, Knuckles and Rouge all day. Better recognize!"
"Rouge will be mine, and you have no choice but to accept it!"
"Pfft, I ain't accepting nothing..."
"Hey you guys, can you calm down, just for a second?" Itsuki asked Knuckles and Shadow, but neither man would listen. It was getting personal now.
Itsuki: Master Hand left me in charge of casting and rehearsal while he paid Crazy Hand a visit. If he comes back and see that I had to cancel rehearsal early because of two blokes fighting over a girl...then he wouldn't be a very happy camper.
"Knuckles the Echidna, I am telling you to back down, or else," ordered Shadow, not knowing that Knuckles wasn't the kind of guy to accept orders from anyone.
"And I am telling you that I will never back down, especially to the likes of you," Knuckles fired back, getting all up in Shadow's grill.
"In that case, I'll have to make you back down."
"Oh really? How are you gonna do that?"
"Through the use of force, that's how."
"What, you think you're some kind of Jedi or something? Nice try..."
"Since you're not afraid...I will fight you!"
"Okay then, fine with me! We'll have...a duel! Winner gets Rouge."
"Fine!"
"Fine!"
And with that, the verbal confrontation came to an end, as both Knuckles and Shadow shook hands. Itsuki, who was getting tired of the verbal spatting, fell to his knees, like he was out of breath.
"This constant fighting is getting out of hand..." remarked the Black Knight, getting up and leaving the meeting room. "I'll be in my room, sipping my tea..." What a somewhat fitting thing for the Black Knight to do.
"So Mister In Denial, are we gonna use weapons or not?" Knuckles asked Shadow, and that was when Itsuki rose up to his feet. Things were being turned up to eleven now.
"You know what, this is getting out of hand real quick," said the young man, confronting Knuckles and Shadow. "Either you two take this thing out of this room, before I have to..."
"This is none of your business, begone with you!" Shadow shouted at Itsuki, grabbing the young man and tossing him out of the meeting room, before returning his attention to Knuckles. "Go ahead and use whatever weapon you like...just know that we're doing our duel outside, and I'll be using...my hands!" Shadow held up his dukes, and Knuckles wasn't impressed.
"You think your dumb hands are gonna best me?" scoffed Knuckles, who was hoping Shadow was just joking around. But Shadow never joked around, if ever. "Fine then, I'll just steal Link's sword, and use it to cut off your hands! How about that?"
"If that's what you're going for, then I might have to find a weapon myself..." The stakes were set - Knuckles and Shadow were going to do battle outside the mansion, and whoever won gets rights to have Rouge as their girlfriend. Bayonetta, seated away from the duelists with a smile, found the situation very intriguing.
Bayonetta: I've had two men fight over me before. Usually it's over which one gets to hold the camcorder. Some teeth were lost here and there.
Having raided a vending machine, Rouge was lying against a wall near the vending machine room, eating some snacks she collected. As Rouge was eating some potato chips, Zelda and Midna approached the bat.
"Hey Rouge - Midna and I just came from the meeting room," Zelda said to Rouge. Were Zelda and Midna being cast into Master Hand's play? Midna might be playing the Ghost of Christmas Past...or Present...or Future...or all three of 'em! "Shadow and Knuckles agreed to a duel outside, and they're fighting for your affection! You have to put an end to the duel before it happens.
"A duel for my affection, hmm?" smiled Rouge, thinking about the many possible results of the duel. "I shall respect the results of the duel." A very fitting answer from Rouge.
"Of course you will..." Zelda wasn't surprised by Rouge's answer in the slightest - some people just want to watch the world burn. Rouge was a true agent of chaos.
"I call loser!" announced Midna, who, like Rouge, also wanted to watch the world burn. Preferably in a more drastic way.
Away from Zelda, Midna, and Rouge, Itsuki was standing by himself, rubbing his forehead and his temple. He was recovering from the drama that ensued from Knuckles and Shadow, and was nervous of Master Hand putting him on blast for allowing Knuckles and Shadow to cut into rehearsal time. Might be in the doghouse.
"Itsuki, can you come-a with me to the lecture hall?" an Italian voice asked the young man; Itsuki looked down, and saw Mario. "Tsubasa is very upset..."
Recovering nicely from his extremely awkward moment with Wolf, Link was ready for some good old-fashioned sword training. Although the Hylian considered himself to be a great swordsman, he still felt like honing his sword skills even more, so he could be the best swordsman that ever lived. He wanted to bring honor and prestige to the Master Sword in every way possible.
When Link went to his room to retrieve his sword, he noticed that something was up...HIS SWORD WASN'T EVEN THERE! The Master Sword, which Link would leave on his dresser, would nowhere to be found. It couldn't have grown legs and ran away from Link - Hylia would never grant the blade such abilities.
"The heck is my blade?" wondered Link, as he searched around his room, looking in his closet and underneath his bed. As Cloud, already in the room playing with Cloud Jr, remained moderately chill.
Itsuki, along with Mario, Fox, and Falco, were in the lecture hall, near the backstage area. They were all eavesdropping on Captain Falcon, who was continuing his phone conversation with Olivia.
"You're sure that next week is going to be, and I quote, 'the bomb'," said Olivia, as Itsuki listened along. "Then I'll just have to show up at this concert that you've invited me to and see for myself! Not talking about the concert, are you?"
"Good heavens, no - what Itsuki and I have planned is way more special than some crappy holiday concert," assured Captain Falcon; Mario and company looked at Itsuki, making sure that the young man was still listening. "I can rest assure you that there won't be a single dry eye when I'm through!" Fox's bizarre marriage proposal theory sounded plausible all of a sudden.
After exchanging goodbyes with Olivia, Captain Falcon walked out of backstage, whistling a happy tune as he began to leave the lecture hall. Mario, Fox, Falco, and Itsuki hid themselves along the curtains so Falcon couldn't see them.
Captain Falcon: Again with this stupid question?! I. DON'T. LOVE. OLIVIA!...Oh, so you think that I'm in love with her, because I keep denying it! We'll I've denied Palutena's desserts on numerous occasions, does that mean I enjoy eating them?! No no no!...You didn't, see anything in the trash can in my room, did you?
"Alright Itsuki, what's the big-a deal, what are you and-a Falcon planning?" Mario would ask the young man, when the coast was clear. Mario, Fox, and Falco were all looking at Itsuki intently, refusing to let him go unless he fessed up.
"Whatever we have planned, it has little to do with Olivia, if that's what you're thinking," assured Itsuki, but Mario and company didn't buy that. "Captain Falcon has a strong tendency to blow things out of proportion..."
"Captain Falcon sure sounded like he was enjoying talking to Olivia...is he in love with her?" asked Falco; if Itsuki was planning with Falcon, he could answer this question upright and give Mario and company some insight as to what was going on.
"He loves her...as a friend. But not as a girlfriend. Captain Falcon is not going to cross the line - not now, not ever. So you can just put your suspicions to bed..."
"Mario, Mario, it's terrible!" Toad suddenly ran inside the lecture hall, alarming Mario with his arms flailing about. "Knuckles and Shadow, they're about to have a duel in the front of the mansion!"
It was now time...time for Knuckles and Shadow to duel, and fight for Rouge's love and affection. Knuckles was out first, with Link's Master Sword. Shadow was nowhere to be found - maybe he punked out at the list minute. But Shadow was too focused and determined to ever punk out.
"Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Knuckles shouted, as he patrolled the front yard. He was holding the Master Sword in a way that would make Link proud. "Where are you? Let's do this! Come on!"
Up in a room on the second floor of the mansion, several residents were looking through the windows to watch the duel from a safe distance. It had become a bit of a watch party, as Cilan brought some finger foods. Rouge was present in the room, shaking her head at Knuckles with a smirk.
"I can't believe it, they're actually going to fight over me," remarked the bat, in slight disbelief that the beef between Knuckles and Shadow had to go this far. "They're actually going to fight over me..."
"I guess people have fewer choices as they get older," remarked Samus, who was eating from the plate of finger foods. Only came just for the finger foods. "When Knuckles and Shadow become middle-aged men, they'll have all-out turf wars to determine who gets the last slice of pizza at a birthday party."
"Has anything happened yet?" asked Nana, as Knuckles continued to shout, questioning where Shadow was. Shadow might still be looking for his weapon of choice.
"Nothing yet - it's fifteen minutes till 7:00, that's when dinner begins," answered Popo, taking a glance at his watch. "I think Shadow will be a no-show." Quite uncharacteristic for Shadow to back down if that were true.
"Oh come on, man, believe in something!" said Wario, who only came just to see somebody get beat up to a pulp. "You just have to believe!"
Wario: Should have placed some bets on the duel...Shadow would win anyways, but if I somehow convinced everyone that Knuckles would come out victorious, I would be even richer! *laughs*
"Where are you, you edgy coward?" Knuckles continued to shout, still patrolling the front yard. He kept doing this until he saw a note posted on a tree. He went over to read said note. "What does this say...'Dear Knuckles...please be warned that you are dealing with an ultimate lifeform, and that anyone who dares to oppose me will end in death. This is a duel that you are not meant to win, and I won't bother wasting my ultimate power on the likes of you'..."
As Knuckles read the rest of the note, a certain pickup truck slowly neared Knuckles, creeping in slowly yet effectively. That truck was named Epona, and its owner, Link, wasn't behind the wheel...it was Shadow.
"I see Shadow, he's driving in Link's truck!" Layton informed the others, able to discern Shadow driving Epona through the window. "What is he doing?"
"Why isn't Knuckles turning around?" wondered Ganondorf, growing fearful of Knuckles' sudden lack of self-awareness, as Knuckles kept reading the note.
"The truck is silent if he keeps it under five miles per hour," Jacky explained to the others, furrowing his brow as he watched closely for whatever move Shadow would make. "Shadow totally deserves the win for that strategy alone."
"Knuckles came to the duel playing checkers, but Shadow is out here playing chess..." Ryu analyzed the duel, as Toad brought Mario to the room. Fox, Falco, and Itsuki also came along, just to see what was happening.
"Mama mia!" exclaimed Mario, when he saw Knuckles and Shadow outside, with Shadow preparing to ram Link's truck into Knuckles. Had it not been for him eavesdropping on Captain Falcon, the plumber could have taken measures to stop the duel.
"Bruh, the heck is going on outside?" Falco asked the others, wishing he had a closer view so he could record the duel and replay it for the memories.
"Shadow is trying to run over Knuckles with Link's truck, apparently," answered Coco, as Shadow was inching closer to Knuckles.
By the time Knuckles was finished reading the note, Shadow finally caught up to the echidna. The hedgehog would ram Epona into Knuckles, pushing him against the tree.
"Ow, hey, what the..." Knuckles flinched in pain as he was pinned against the tree, with nowhere to go, no room for escape. Shadow got him good, and the hedgehog was relishing in the moment.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS KNUCKLES, AND BAH HUMBUG!" grinned Shadow, showing off his malicious side. "Give up yet?"
"I'll never give up!" Knuckles, with the Master Hand, attacked the hood of Epona aggressively. "Get out of that truck and face me like the man you think you are!"
"I am a man - in fact, I'm the ultimate lifeform! I'm a bigger man than you'll ever be! I would never date a woman who is already in love with another man!"
"You're not a man! You don't know how to take care of her! Didn't give a crap about loving Rouge until today! You can't even protect her!"
"Protect her from what? The Deadly Six? Chaos? Robotniks? Dr. Eggman? When's the last time you even saw Dr. Eggman, you idiot?"
"Like a couple of weeks ago, idiot!" Knuckles struck Epona even harder with the Master Sword. Just then, Link ran outside the mansion, so he could have a word with the duelists...or one of the duelists, rather.
"KNUCKLES YOU BUM, STOP ATTACKING EPONA AND GIVE ME BACK MY SWORD!" Link shouted at the echidna, currently oblivious to Shadow riding the truck. Epona's safety always came first.
"Man shut up Link, your stupid truck is a dying heap of trash anyway." A now offended Link was inadvertently knocked to the ground by Sonic, who rushed in to check on Knuckles and Shadow.
"Knuckles, Shadow, are you two alright?" the blue blur asked the two duelists, wishing he had arrived earlier to stop Shadow from what he was doing.
"Get lost Sonic, I'm winning this!" Shadow barked at the hedgehog, as he continued to ram Epona into Knuckles. Nothing Knuckles did could stop Shadow.
"You heard the man, Sonic - take Link and get outta here," Knuckles said to his best friend, as Sonic did as he was told, albeit reluctantly. "This is our battle, not yours." As Sonic and Link returned to the mansion, Knuckles stabbed Epona with the Master Sword. "Oh, I wonder how much this costs! Have fun paying for the damages for Link's truck!"
Link: Epona, she'll be just fine...she has survived snowstorms, heavy rainfall, gusty wins, and even Wario's flatulence. Regardless of what Knuckles does to her (he'll pay eventually) Epona will be just fine.
"What was that, Knuckles?" asked Shadow; Knuckles tried to open his mouth, only to be interrupted by Shadow honking Epona's horn. "Sorry, can't hear you, you stupid idiot! Stupid echidna! What's an echidna supposed to be anyway?"
"Echidnas are spiny anteaters, and they can lay eggs like platypuses!" Knuckles had to inform Shadow, slightly regretting mentioning the egg-laying part. "I, on the other hand, don't lay eggs - I can fly! Which makes me the greatest echidna to have ever lived!"
"I don't understand...how could Rouge possibly love you when she gave me THIS!" Shadow dug into his imaginary pocket, and held out an item - an item that made Knuckles cease the attacking. It was a gift, one strongly resembling the present Knuckles received at the beginning of the episode - same wrapping paper, same bow, same size, same everything. And Knuckles was dumbfounded.
"She gave you a gift too? That looks...an awful lot like the one she gave me..." Knuckles took out his gift, showing it to Shadow, leaving Shadow bewildered as to how strikingly similar the two gifts were. How could he and Knuckles have the same gifts?!
"Okay, this is..." Shadow was at a loss of words. "...alright, on a count of three, we open our gifts and see what's inside. Ready?" Knuckles nodded his head. "Okay...one...two...three."
At the same time, Knuckles and Shadow unwrapped their gifts and opened them, before taking out...a diamond. A very large diamond, at that.
"I don't believe it...we both received the same thing...from Rouge..." said Shadow, looking at the diamond all silly. Knuckles kinda did the same. "Only reason why I asked her out on a date was because of the gift she gave me...I thought she loved me...cared for me...and when I asked her out...she agreed to the date...oh man..."
Feeling like he just got played, Knuckles looked up, and saw Rouge peering through the window. The bat looked at the battlefield, dismayed...she dun goofed up now.
Around the time the Knuckles-Shadow beef came to an end, it was time for dinner. Dunban was supposed to be in charge of cooking dinner, but he was feeling lazy today, so he went ahead and ordered pizza. Ordering pizza - the number one go-to move when you didn't feel like cooking. As everyone was in the dining room eating their pizza, Knuckles trudged into the room, looking down at the floor with his diamond in his hands.
"Yo Knuckles, who won, you or Shadow?" Sonic asked his best friend, who ignored the blue blur as he walked towards Shulk, placing his diamond near the Homs.
"Take my diamond Shulk, I don't care..." said Knuckles, as he walked away somberly. That was one unwanted gift for Shulk. Seconds later, Shadow entered the dining room, also giving away his diamond to Shulk.
"Here, you can take my diamond too..." the hedgehog said to Shulk after giving away his diamond, before finding a seat. Now that was two unwanted gifts for Shulk. Once he sound a seat and sat down, Shadow took out his phone, and dialed a number. "Hello, Olive Garden? It's me, Shadow the Hedgehog. I believed I had a reservation for two, on December 17th? I'd like to cancel that please. Yes, as soon as possible. Thank you. Goodbye."
After cancelling his date, Shadow put his cellphone away, as he buried his face in his arms on the table. Rouge looked on through the dining room entrance, fearing that she might have lost Knuckles forever...
Master Hand: Just returned from my special visit with Crazy Hand, and we had a lot to talk about! Did you know that he has a crush on Lady Palutena? That's something you don't hear everyday! Crazy Hand, he's one who would look past your flaws, so he won't mind that Palutena is a horrible cook. I also learned from Crazy Hand that he enjoys wearing briefs over boxers! I have no idea how it's possible; I think he puts his index and middle finger through the briefs, and use his two fingers to walk like how a person would. I've tried it out before, didn't feel right...
Master Hand returned to the mansion, expecting people to fall down to their knees and kiss up to him. So when the giant hand saw that nobody was in the foyer, the disappointment inside of him was at an all-time high.
However, he did see Isabelle, so that was nice...Master Hand supposed.
"Welcome back, Master Hand!" Isabelle greeted the giant hand, as Master Hand approached her. "How was your visit with Crazy Hand, everything went well? Marth gave me a joyride around Seattle in your Lamborghini today, and he said that it was an order sent down from you...but I know you wouldn't stoop that low to do nice things for me!"
"Yeah, I think that man Marth might be on something," replied Master Hand, who had given Isabelle her first breakfast in bed this past Sunday (thanks in part to Mario capturing Isabelle's body in the previous episode). Isabelle kept asking Master Hand why she received such treatment, and Master Hand, believing that the shih tzu was being forgetful, decided to play with her mind. "So, did anything exciting happen while I was away? Ness and Lucas had a home run derby for the ages in the backyard? Someone walked out on Microwave Idol Mamorin? Did Ike finally kiss a girl?!"
Isabelle bit her lip with her lone tooth, as she looked towards her right and saw Knuckles, sitting in a chair. The echidna was down in the dumps, looking down at the floor with hands clasped together, and Sonic and Tails were there to comfort him. Poor Knuckles was possibly contemplating his romantic life after today's events.
"Well, let's just say that a lot went down, when Rouge and Shadow were here..." replied the shih tzu, nervously scratching her head.