Author's Note:
This two-parter is mainly inspired by one of my favorite episodes of a beloved cartoon series that I cherished during my childhood - Codename: Kids Next Door, "OPERATION I.T." One of my favorite episodes, I must say. This is the shortest chapter I've written since probably chapter 41, so I was finished way ahead of time. One guest review to answer:
"Can you include Mappy? (Since that was an arcade game made by Namco) the characters from Gunstar Super Heroes? Maybe Magilou from Tales of Berseria playing pranks on the Tales characters? Are Edge and Reimi from Star Ocean: The Last Hope going to be a couple? No offense to the Vyse and Fina paring but why not pair Vyse with Aika? (Since they were childhood friends) And finally, how soon will we see the Dead or Alive characters showing up?"
Sure, I'll include Mappy. And the characters from Gunstar Super Heroes. Magilou might pull a prank or two. Edge and Reimi will DEFINITELY be a couple (and yes, I do ship them). Fina seems like more of a perfect gal for Vyse, if you ask me. And I don't know about the status of the Deav or Alive characters.
This chapter...this chapter is under one thousand words...that concerns me for some reason. Might've made it too short and sweet.
Episode 107: Tagged Part 1
It was a new year at the Smash Mansion. New beginnings. New adventures. New memories. Everything was to start anew.
When the producers of "Smash Life" returned to the mansion, they saw that everything was just how it was two weeks ago. Cilan was still the head chef of the mansion. Wario was still the mansion's resident cheapskate. Toon Link and Young Link were still buddycops, patrolling the mansion and looking for crime. Cloud was still being his apathetic self. Sora was still annoying Cloud to no end, hoping to bring back his "memories". And Master Hand was still ruling over the mansion, and with an iron fist.
But today, the giant hand who single-handedly created the Smash universe wouldn't be ruling over the Smash Mansion any longer.
Frankly, Master Hand was getting tired of being the head of the mansion - even more so by people such as Isabelle following the giant hand and telling him about things he didn't care about. It was becoming very tiring for Master Hand, and the giant hand felt like going away.
"Master Hand, Lucas got his head stuck in-between the railing of the stairs!" Isabelle informed the giant hand; Lucas might be crying his eyes out about his unfortunate situation. "What should we do?"
"Get Donkey Kong to pull him out, and make sure he doesn't hurt Lucas either," replied Master Hand, trying to get away from Isabelle as he went to his room.
"Master Hand, I accidentally got myself in a beef with some dude on the street!" Knuckles approached the giant hand. You'd think Knuckles would take care of this beef himself, rather than asking Master Hand for guidance. "You gotta help me out, man!"
"How about you just hug things out with the dude, and let bygones be bygones. Can't afford to take you to the hospital!"
"Master Hand, I was thinking about starting a k-pop group with my friends," Roy approached the giant hand - he wasn't being serious, was he? "What do you think of this idea?"
"You'll be the most stupid of stupid idiots if you even think about going forth with that plan. You can't sing nor dance, and the same can be said for the rest of..."
"Master Hand, I just had a bad dream - Rush was humping another robot dog!" Mega Man approached the giant hand. The blue bomber should've just kept that to himself. "How can I get that mental image out of my head?"
"First of all, that's gross and freaky. Secondly, you should take out that dream chip or whatever you call it, and destroy it to pieces. Boom, problem solved!"
Master Hand had finally reached his room, with Isabelle and company still voicing their concerns. Once inside the room, Master Hand planned to close the door ASAP and lock it, so he wouldn't have to hear any cares and concerns from the residents.
Master Hand: Do I like ruling over the Smash Mansion? Eh, it's alright...though it could be better. It's hard to go through a single day without people hounding you and telling you about their troubles, when they could deal with their own situations themselves. I'm not a miracle worker - it's not like I can touch a cancer-ridden child in the St Jude's hospital and instantly cure their illness. Such powers could potentially break the universe!
But when Master Hand entered his bedroom, he saw all sorts of people gathered inside, all of them telling the giant hand their share of problems. What did Master Hand do to deserve this?!
"Master Hand, Dixie Kong sent me a text and I don't know how to respond, I need your help man!" said Diddy Kong. Good thing he didn't go to Chrom for advice.
"Master Hand my Master Sword got stolen again, and I think my bow and arrows got stolen too!" said Link. Why was the Hylian's stuff always stolen?
"Master Hand, my laptop won't charge and I need a new battery, can you get me a new battery please?" implored Coco, who couldn't be without her trusty pink laptop.
"Master Hand...do you truly love me?" Lloyd would ask Master Hand this extremely random question. A question Master Hand did not bother to answer.
As the complaints and questions began to mount up, Master Hand began to boil with fury, as he started to shake rather violently. The only person that noticed was Isabelle, who followed Master Hand to his room; she wanted to say something, but wondered if speaking up was the right idea.
"I'VE HAD IT, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!" boomed Master Hand, effectively shutting everyone up as the chatter in the room immediately died down. Everyone looked on warily, as Master Hand began to cool down, inhaling and exhaling. "I want everyone in this mansion to be in the meeting room, twelve o' clock stat! That is an order, so spread the word! Anyone who isn't at the meeting by twelve will be severely punished!"
"Do you wish to bring Mario, Luigi, and their folks over for the meeting?" asked Isabelle. Sounds like a very important meeting was on the horizon.
"Yes, I want them to attend the meeting as well. There's gonna be some changes made...changes that will make or break this mansion!"
An hour later, all the residents gathered in the meeting room for Master Hand's big meeting. Amy and Fiora were forced to attend, and anyone who was in the mansion at the time was forced to attend the meeting as well. That went out to Nowi, the half-Manakete who hooked back up with Captain Falcon two episodes ago.
"Mom, do we really have to be here?" Nowi's daughter, Nah, asked her mom, who was busy mingling with Captain Falcon. It seemed like Nowi and Falcon had never broke up. "We don't even live at the mansion!"
"Now now, sweetheart, we just have to do whatever makes Master Hand happy," replied Nowi, as she and Captain Falcon disgusted those who were coming in with their display of affection. "You wouldn't want to face Master Hand's wrath, do you?"
"I guess not..." Nah sighed and folded her arms, as Mario and Luigi entered the meeting room with their crew. It was in this meeting room that Mario and Luigi saw a familiar face - one they did not expect to see.
"Professor Layton?!" the brothers exclaimed in unison, as they saw Professor Layton seated at the table, with a smile...and Luke Triton seated next to him. Sadly Luke cannot get any love...
"Surprised to see me, huh?" asked Layton, amused by the shocked faces of Mario and Luigi. "I said I would stay until the holidays, didn't I? Well, let's just say that I opted to stay a bit longer...just to keep away from someone."
Layton: Using my time at the mansion to hide from my daughter, Katrielle. Why am I hiding from her, you ask? I can't exactly tell you...for now.
"But your wives know - they sent Luke and I a call, believing that we were going return to Britain, but I told them that we would be extending our stay," added Layton, as Mario, still shocked, pointed at Layton. Luigi kinda did the same thing. "Master Hand was perfectly fine with our decision!"
"B-B-B-B-But..." stammered Mario, as Peach and Daisy came over to see their husbands in their state of shock. It was just as amusing to them as it was to Layton.
"C'mon now, you two, the meeting's about to begin!" Peach said, as she and Daisy took their husbands, and dragged them to their seats. Once everyone was in the meeting room, and everyone was seated, Master Hand appeared at the front of the room, with Isabelle standing at his side.
"Good afternoon everyone, glad you all could be here," greeted Master Hand, who made darn sure everyone was in attendance. No punishments had to be made. "Now I know you're all wondering why I gathered you all here, and I know that you probably have better things to do than attend some lousy meeting...but let me just say that I have something very important to address. Something that could potentially change this mansion forever. I have decided to..."
"Oh, Master Hand, may I be excused, it's an emergency!" Cortex blurted out, leaving Master Hand to sigh deeply. "It cannot wait any longer!"
"Can this 'emergency' wait until after the meeting is over? It can't be that important...you're not trying to skip this meeting, are you?"
"No sir, not at all! I have a very upset stomach, and I feel the dire need to use the bathroom. Must be those pancakes I ate for breakfast...please, Master Hand, you have to let me go, you just have to!"
"Well if you have to go that badly, then I'll release you from the meeting room...Dr. Neo Cortex, I hereby allow you..."
"THANK YOU!" Cortex, without receiving a word of confirmation, ran out of the meeting faster than you could say "Bazinga!" Uka looked back at Cortex, shaking his head in disdain.
"Kinda happy he's gone...as I was saying, I have something very important to address, yadda yadda yadda, something that could change this mansion forever, yadda yadda yadda...what I'm trying to say is, ruling this mansion is a very enduring task, one that requires a lot of responsibility, and, admittedly, it can become very tiring and taxing, especially on someone like myself. And now, I have one important declaration to make...TAG, YOU'RE IT!"
Master Hand poked Isabelle, and vanished away in a snap, as a now afraid Isabelle looked out at everyone in the meeting room. Everyone gasped, before screaming and running out of the meeting room, bumping and pushing each other just to get out...although some were extremely chill about escaping. Samus and Meta Knight were prime examples.
Touma: We're all playing a game of tag?! Why weren't we informed about this earlier?!
Ness: I can't play tag, I'm only a teenager! Too old for this stuff!
Lara: Hard to believe we're playing a child's game of tag...why not have a battle to the death instead? This place is called the Smash Mansion...
Bowser: What happens if you win this game of tag? What happens if you lose? Would the last person it be the loser? That would mean we would have around a hundred winners! We better get any participation trophies for this!
"Wait, what, what do I have to be it for?" complained Isabelle, in her state of panic. She was desperately looking for someone to tag, when Cortex returned to the meeting room, not feeling that relieved...
"Turns out I didn't have to use the bathroom at all - my stomach was just playing tricks with me!" remarked the mad scientist as he returned...only to see the meeting room empty. "What's this? The meeting is already over? They dare to end the meeting without ME?! Those filthy peons, they'll pay for this!"
"Tag, you're it!" Isabelle tagged Cortex, before hightailing out of the meeting room. Best to keep her distance from Cortex...or everyone else, for that matter. Work out a strategy of some sort.
"Whaddaya mean, I'm it?" Uka would hover down to Cortex, sensing the N head's confusion. "Uka, can you explain what's going on?"
"Master Hand randomly started a game of tag, and now you're it," Uka explained to Cortex. He couldn't play, for he had no hands to tag anyone with. If he were to be tagged, the game would end in a standstill!
"A game of tag, eh? This reminds me of my days playing tag with my classmates at the Academy of Evil...some vividly bad memories, I'll say. But I don't believe Master Hand would have a game of tag. Let me ask someone else for clarification!"
As stated earlier by Roy, the swordsman wished to start a k-pop, with his friends. Who were his friends? Chrom, Ike, Marth, Robin, Alm, and Berkut, of course! Roy was apparently inspired by watching the famous k-pop group BTS on some New Year's special, and felt inspired enough to start a k-pop group on his own.
"I was thinking that you could be the lead singer, Ike can be the rapper, and everyone else can be backup singers and dancers," Roy was going over what he wanted to see from the k-pop group with Chrom in the hallway. Chrom's hair was growing back, but the prince felt comfortable wearing knit hats until his hair was fully grown.
"Okay, but what qualifications does Ike even have to be the rapper?" asked Chrom, feeling very cynical about Roy's k-pop boy band idea. It could very well end in disaster, or end in even more disaster. No positive results were in sight.
"Most rappers today are tough guys, and Ike is the toughest out of all of us. And the most ripped too, meaning he'll have the rapper persona locked down."
"Didn't know wearing skinny jeans all the time equated to 'being tough'...and what about Alm and Berkut? Even though Berkut can't outright kill Alm, he'll still be determined to make his life miserable."
"...and that's why Berkut will be the bad boy of our group - the guy constantly getting into trouble and doing controversial things. Every boy band needs a bad influence."
Roy: Spoke with Fox, Falco, and Itsuki about my boy band idea - Fox and Falco both pointed and laughed at me, whereas Itsuki just smiled in response, not saying a single word...I think they all like it!
Chrom: *shaking his head* Just...just end me, right now...
"Excuse me, Roy and Chrom!" Cortex, accompanied by Uka, called out to the swordsmen from afar, grabbing their attention. "I have been informed that we're playing a game of tag...is this true or not?"
"Oh no, Cortex must be it!" fretted Chrom, as he and Roy ran away. They bumped into each other by accident, before running off in their separate ways.
"Just like I told you..." Uka said to Cortex, when Cortex's arch-nemesis Crash walked by. The bandicoot was minding his own business, which made him the perfect prey for Cortex.
"You're it, bandicoot!" Cortex tagged Crash, before running off Crash looked around in bewilderment, before screeching at the top of his lungs and running away like a manic, his arms in the air. Wouldn't want to see a screeching Crash coming towards you at full force any day of the week.
Peach was lurking around the foyer, not seeing a single person since everyone ran out of the meeting room...almost like everyone (save for some) was taking this game of tag seriously. Nobody knew yet why they were playing tag for, though Master Hand might explain later on.
Speaking of whom, Peach looked out the window, and saw Master Hand on the porch, speaking with Mario. Peach would quietly exit the mansion, so she could hear the conversation.
"Getting sick and tired, man, sick of it all..." griped Master Hand, allowing Mario to gently pat him. Mario better make the most of this one-and-only opportunity. "Feel like I'm gonna explode at any minute!"
"At least-a you're voicing your concerns, rather than keeping them-a inside of you," said Mario, as Peach got closer. "The longer you bottle up-a your inner feelings, the more-a likely you are-a to feel even more angry about-a things!"
"What are you two discussing?" Peach would ask Mario and Master Hand; the ongoing conversation was leaving the princess intrigued.
"Master Hand has told-a me that he plans on stepping down-a as the head of the mansion," explained Mario; catching Peach by surprise. Why would Master Hand - the creator of the Smash universe, a powerful entity - step down from his post? You'd think he enjoyed ruling over the mansion, getting to boss people around and dole out punishments and all that good stuff.
"It's true...being the head of mansion has become very dull for me, and at times frustrating," said Master Hand, as Peach did something she never thought she would do in a million years...sympathize for Master Hand. "Sure it might sound fun ruling over people, and having authority at all...but over time, it gets to the point where you don't want to do it anymore. And I'm at that point now...having to hear people voice their concerns, and tell you all about their troubles - I mean, I am all powerful and stuff, but I can't solve everyone's problems!"
"But I thought you loved being the head of the Smash Mansion, I've never heard you complain about your day job! And you're a far more superior leader than Crazy Hand could aspire to be...I shudder to think how he would handle having his own mansion!"
"I shudder when thinking that as well...but now, I feel like a changing of the guard is in order. Which is why I called that game of tag - whoever's it by two o' clock will be declared the new head of the mansion. It will be up to whoever 'wins' the game of tag to preside over the mansion, and make important decisions and whatnot and keep everything balanced."
"Well, Master Hand, if you want-a to step down from your current-a role..." started Mario, heaving a sigh. "...then the choice-a is yours. I can't think-a of anyone who could do a better job-a than you...but none-a the less, the decision is yours."
"Thank you two for understanding. You two and Isabelle are the only three individuals that I can speak with regarding my inner feelings and convictions. Princess Zelda is a close fourth, though - everyone else can go screw themselves. Now, Princess Peach, is there anything you wish to tell us?"
"There is one thing I have to get off my chest..." answered Peach, as a devious smile grew on her face. "...I just so happen to be it!"
"Mama mia!" exclaimed Mario as he hopped off the porch, to escape from his wife. Master hand likewise would also retreat, vanishing away, as Peach hummed a happy tune and skipped her way back inside the mansion.
Master Hand: Why am I participating in this game of tag, even though I've made known that I don't want to be the head of the Smash Mansion again? Good question, good question indeed...ask me again when the game is over.
Once back inside the mansion, Peach would find Falco, and tag him. With Falco now it, the avian pilot was doing everything he could to lift the burden off of him. And he knew the perfect guy...
"Bruh, Fox, I think I have some bad news..." Falco said to Fox, who just exited the bathroom. Poor Fox didn't have any idea of what was coming to him.
"What is this bad news that you speak of?" asked Fox, feeling somewhat skeptical. "Katt Monroe dumped you for Slippy Toad? Yikes, man..." Any man who gets dumped in favor of Slippy Toad should definitely reevaluate their love life.
"It's, it's just that...YOU'RE IT!" Falco tagged Fox, and then made a run for it. But Fox was just as fast as Falco, if not faster, and so he chased him down and tagged him.
"Hahaha, now you're it again! How you like that?!"
"I believe it's you who's it, good sir!" Falco would tag Fox yet again. Fox and Falco would keep tagging each other...
...before the pilots were enveloped in a slap fight. Ganondorf would walk by, seeing the slap fight, and shook his head. A prime example of why having a game of tag in the mansion might've not been the best idea...
"One of you two is it, right?" Ganondorf would ask the pilots; both Fox and Falco nodded their heads, before continuing their slap fight. Their fight would come to an end, when Ganondorf tagged the both of them. "There, now you can both end your stupid fight. Happy now?"
"Uh, yeah, thanks a lot, Ganondorf," thanked Fox...before he and Falco ran away from the demon lord. Ganondorf would shake his head yet again as he continued on his way, before encountering King K. Rool in the hallway. The Kremling was hiding in a closet - only problem was he was on the floor, hands over his head, and his butt poking in the air. Ganondorf, unimpressed by Rool's hiding abilities, would tag Rool.
"Just to let you know, you're it now," the demon lord informed Rool, who angrily got up to his feet and glared down Ganondorf.
"Dang nab it Ganon, how did you know I was hiding in the closet?!" questioned Rool, like he didn't expect anyone to notice a giant green Kremling bosom sticking out from the closet. Rool's weight would already prevent him from hiding at all.
"Your bottom was poking out of the closet door for everyone to see...don't know what you were expecting. It's hard not to notice." Angry that his hiding spot was discovered, Rool continued glaring at Ganondorf, until he saw Birdo walking by with the corner of his eye.
"Tag, you're it!" the Kremling would tag Birdo before running off; Ganondorf would do the same.
"Oh, I'm it, mercy me..." said Birdo, who did not mind being it at all, for she found the person person to tag...a green dinosaur down the hallway, who looked back and shuddered in fear when he saw Birdo staring at him. "Hey boo!" Birdo called out to the frightened Yoshi.
"You'll never take me alive, woman!" vowed Yoshi, as he ran down the hall. Birdo would chase after her man, hot on his heels.
Yoshi: Birdo is practically obsessed with me, I tell you, obsessed...last night, I saw her looking through my bedroom window watching me as I sleep! I told Knuckles to do something about it, but he said something about respecting women too much to drive Birdo away. Was unable to sleep that night, felt tired all...
Birdo: *from afar* Oh, Yoshi, where are you? You can't hide from me forever!
Yoshi: Crap I hear her coming for me! Gotta go!
The Inklings, being the fun-loving youngsters that they were, loved to play tag as much as they enjoyed their epic paint battles. You'd think the two friends would be participating in the game of tag, but instead they were in the ball pit room, playing in the pit of colored rubber balls. They would keep playing as Yoshi ran inside the room, leaping into the ball pit.
"Sup Yoshi, and welcome to the ball pit!" the male Inkling said to Yoshi, who was more focused on hiding himself than speaking with the Inklings. "We're just chilling here until the game of tag is almost over."
"Yeah, so that when the game is almost over, we can tag the last person to be it!" added the female Inkling. Considering how the Inklings were working together in the prank war, this strategy was slightly expected. "Maybe whoever is it last will win something!"
"Shut up and don't tell Birdo I'm here..." Yoshi told the Inklings, burying himself underneath the rubber balls. Talk about a double negative. Birdo would enter the ball pit room, and see Yoshi's tail sticking out from the sea of rubber balls.
"Oh, Yoshi, I can see you..." cooed Birdo, creeping towards the green dinosaur. Yoshi, feeling Birdo getting closer, would appear out from the rubber balls, knowing what to do.
"Hey kid, make yourself useful!" Yoshi would grab the male Inkling and hold him up right when Birdo was about to tag him. Which meant that Birdo tagged the male Inkling...which meant that the Inkling was now it! Yoshi would drop the male Inkling back inside the pit, before hightailing out of the room.
"You can't run from me forever!" Birdo would chase after her man, as the male Inkling was now it. Bad news for his female counterpart.
"Tag you're it!" the male Inkling would tag his friend.
"Nuh uh, you're it!" the female Inkling would tag right back. She would then exit the ball pit and run away, as the male Inkling also left the ball pit and chased after his friend.
While the game of tag persisted, Cilan was in the kitchen, cooking up a storm. The connoisseur was making some chili, and it had all the works - kidney beans, tomatoes, garlic, onions, cumin, and everything else you could want in a bowl of chili and more. Chili was a very fitting meal during these cold Seattle days.
"Ah, the chili smells so good!" exclaimed Cilan, after he smelt the aroma of his spicy stew creation. "Another culinary masterpiece that the others will enjoy! I must taste my chili right away! Where did I leave that spoon..."
Cilan: As much as I would love to play tag with everyone else, food always comes first before everything. After all, you can't play tag on an empty stomach! I must ensure that my chili is perfect, and pleasing to the tongue, before I involve himself in this tag war. I was up all last night perfecting my chili, and now it is close to perfection! Would be a shame if all my hard work were to go to waste...
Unfortunately for Cilan, that was exactly what happened. As Cilan found his spoon, ready to sample his chili, the Inklings would run into the kitchen, with the female Inkling being ahead of her pal.
"Tag, you're it!" the female Inkling would tag Cilan, hitting him in the leg. Cilan would suddenly lose his balance as he flailed his arms about, and his arm hit the pot of chili as he fell onto the floor. As if that wasn't enough, the chili would spill all over Cilan, and it was piping hot too.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" the connoisseur screamed in burning pain, as he hopped up and tried to wipe the chili off of him. When that wasn't enough, he was left with no choice but to rip off his clothes, and throw them on a sofa in the nearby living room. Cilan, now in his undergarments, would cool off, as he inhaled and exhaled while his body temperature decreased.
"Cilan, is there any reason as to why you're in your t-shirt and briefs?" Pac-Man, entering the living room, would ask Cilan, before noticing the connoisseur's clothes on the sofa. A whole lot of chili stains. "Sheesh, what happened to your clothes? You threw up all over yourself or something? Trust me, I know that feeling too well...a bit TOO well!"
"Pac-Man...consider yourself it," Cilan walked over to the eater of ghosts, tagging him, before picking up his clothes and leaving the premises. "Frankly I have an impromptu date with the washing machine, and the drying machine as well..."
"I'm it?!" panicked Pac-Man, like he was never it before, as he ran around in the living room. "What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?!" The eater of ghosts would run out of the living room, and ran as far as his legs could carry him, until he ran into Samus. Since Pac-Man was so short, he ran into Samus' legs, which befuddled the bounty hunter as it looked like Pac-Man was...hugging her legs.
"Are you...trying to hug me?" asked Samus, as Pac-Man opened his eyes and realized where he was, and what he was doing. Following his realization, he pulled away from Samus, and regained his composure.
"No, no, wasn't trying to hug you just now..." chuckled Pac-Man, awkwardly scratching his head. "Besides, the only person I would ever hug would be my wife!" So you don't even hug your kids, Pac-Man? What a terrible father. "You're it, by the way."
"And here I thought I wouldn't even be a part of this silly child's game..." Samus let out a sigh, as Pac-Man tiptoed away; she knew she should've stayed in the workshop until the coast was clear. "Guess I have to tag somebody then..."
Rool's hiding attempt was an utter travesty - you would have to be blind or completely unobservant to not notice Rool sticking out from the hallway closet. Fortunately Link had a better hiding attempt, as he was hiding inside a cardboard box in the lounge. Zelda and Midna were looking on, easily blowing Link's cover. If said cover wasn't blown already!
"You do realize Snake himself hides in a cardboard box, right?" Zelda asked her boyfriend, who wished for Zelda and Midna to go away. "Why would you copy his own method of hiding? Not original if you ask me..."
"Correction: Snake hides underneath a cardboard box, while I, on the other hand, hide inside of it," stated Link, leading Zelda to roll her eyes. "So take that for originality!"
Zelda: Haven't seen Master Hand since the game of tag started. If this game is meant to crown the new head of the mansion, then I might as well leave myself out of the equation. Being the princess of Hyrule is already enough for me.
"I told him to close the flaps of the box, but he just wouldn't listen," Midna told Zelda, as Samus entered the lounge. "He could use his sword to poke holes through the box so he can breathe." Samus would tag Zelda, grabbing her attention.
"Only tagging you just so I won't involve himself in this stupid game anymore," Samus explained to Zelda, before making her exit. "Doc Louis is just down the hallway if you wanna tag him. If you need me, I'll be in the workshop...just make sure to knock, since the door will be locked."
"Okay then, thanks for the heads up," thanked Zelda. Once Samus was gone, Zelda would too exit the lounge, and walk down the hallway, seeing Doc Louis holding a chocolate bar. How very predictable...
"Nothing can come between us Annabelle, it'll be just you and me, forever until the end!" Doc Louis would say to a chocolate bar, one he would eventually devour later on. Zelda would breeze by Doc, tagging him when he least expected it. "What, did I get tagged? Princess Zelda, was that you?!"
"Catch me if you can!" Zelda called out to Doc Louis, who would drop his precious "Annabelle" to the floor before chasing after the princess. Sadly for Doc, his weight would be his crutch, as he became exhausted and collapsed to the floor, catching his breath. The sweaty boxing trainer remained on the floor when Toad came over to check on him.
"Doc Louis are you alright, you look like you just ran a marathon!" Toad asked the boxing trainer. Apparently running down the hallway was too much of an exercise for Doc Louis.
"Tag...you're it..." panted Doc, as he tagged Toad, before his face and arm fell unto the floor. He was now down for the count.
Cloud had no intentions of playing tag - like Samus and Lana, the swordsman had no business participating in a child's game. A grown adult like himself shouldn't even be playing tag at all. So what did Cloud do to pass the time?
Rest on the hammock in the backyard, of course! Cloud rested in the hammock, looking up at the cloudy sky, as his cares drifted away. Aerith, who was watering the plants in the backyard, looked down at her boyfriend, disgusted by how apathetic he was. Apathy was a part of Cloud Aerith could never change.
"Cloud why don't you want to play tag with the others, you would feel like a little kid again!" Aerith did her best to encourage the swordsman, but Cloud wouldn't budge, as he did his best to ignore Aerith.
"Like I said about the prank war, this game of tag is mind-blowingly stupid and pointless," replied Cloud, as he donned his shades. Anyone can look good with shades on, and Cloud was definitely no exception. "What's even the point of this game anyways? Master hand never specified why, which makes me skeptical."
"If his speech was any indication, I think he wants to appoint a new head of the mansion. That's the vibe I'm getting anyways."
"Count me out. Master Hand is gonna regret this game of tag soon, especially if the 'winner' is someone under-qualified. Or maybe even an outsider, someone we cannot trust. Either way, whole thing's gonna backfire in Master Hand's...face."
Cloud: What would I do if I were the head of the mansion? Easy - get rid of everyone that makes living at the mansion cancerous, starting with Bowser and his bratty children. They can go back to their dumb castle and capture a princess that isn't Peach. We all know Bowser wouldn't want to mess with Daisy.
Geno, who was recently tagged Toad, would poke his head out of the bushes, spotting Cloud on his hammock. Cloud was in a perfect position to be tagged, and his lack of awareness made things even more perfect. So Geno would pop out of the shrubbery, and zip past Aerith, before reaching his prey.
"Tag you're it!" Geno said as he tagged Cloud, before darting down the backyard laughing. A now ticked off Cloud put away his sunglasses, and angrily got out of the hammock.
"You're gonna get it now, buster!" shouted the swordsman, as he chased down Geno. Aerith watched as Cloud chased Geno back inside the mansion, smiling to herself.
"About time Cloud had a little fun..." remarked the flower girl, as she resumed her watering duties.
With his blazing speed, you'd expect Sonic to be a beast in this game of tag. If the hedgehog was ever it, you would always expect him to tag someone else in less than a second with his breakneck speed.
Desiring to show off how fast he was, Sonic was standing in the middle of the hallway, expecting somebody to tag him. He was holding out his hand, and whenever someone walked by him, he would ask them one important question...
"Are you it?" Sonic would ask to anyone he saw, including Tsubasa, Donkey Kong, Ashley, and many others. Some glanced at Sonic and shook their heads no, while others flat out ignored the hedgehog altogether. Tails would approach Sonic, wondering what he was up to.
"Shouldn't you be, I don't know...trying to escape from whoever's it?" Tails would ask Sonic, as Berkut walked by. The paladin had walked past Sonic twice already, and had tuned out the blue blur.
"Nah, running away from said person would be too easy, I would easily outrun them," replied Sonic, wishing for a chili dog. All this standing around was making the hedgehog hungry. "It's when I chase someone down that the fun begins...just seeing their face of panic and despair when I run them down, it makes me feel happy for some reason. Sometimes chasing people as a speeding blue hedgehog is super fun!"
"That is the silliest thing I've ever...look, Cloud and Geno are up ahead!" Indeed they were, as Cloud was still chasing after Geno. Geno would make a sharp turn around the corner, but before he could continue chasing the star...
"Tag you're it!" Cloud would tag Sonic, before heading down the hallway Geno went, having a bone to pick with the star. Sonic cheered and raised his fists upon being tagged, as Tails calmly walked away. Never will you see anyone more excited to be it.
"So, who's going to be our very unfortunate person?" wondered Sonic, rubbing his hands together. He would tag Tails, but the fox already left, much to Sonic's chagrin. However, Sonic would spot a certain individual in yellow armor down the hall, carrying a book. It was Gil, and the de facto librarian looked to his left and saw Sonic, eyeing him intently.
"Uh oh..." muttered Gil as he dropped his book to the floor and tried to make a run for it...but everyone knows you can't outrun Sonic. So Sonic would zip past Gil at blazing speed, tagging him in the process. "Dang it, Sonic!" exclaimed Gil when he felt Sonic's gloved hand making contact with him.
"You snooze, you lose!" Sonic would taunt Gil as he sped down the hallway. Gil would groan to himself as he went to retrieve his book...which was being read by a curious Jigglypuff. The book Jigglypuff was reading was A Catcher in the Rye - a true classic - and it caught every bit of her attention.
"Hahaha, tag you're it!" Gil would tag Jigglypuff, before snatching his book away from the balloon Pokemon and running away. Jigglypuff pouted as he glared at Gil, her hands on her hips.
Gil: This whole game of tag hasn't gotten aggressive...yet. I expect some tackling and pushing to occur when the game is almost over. So, to keep myself safe, I'll be hiding away in the library until the coast is clear. Would Master Hand be angry at me for not participating? Sure, but I've yet to see him ever since he executed the first tag...might be in a undisclosed location, laughing his butt off!
Now it, Jigglypuff would make her way through the mansion, looking for somebody to tag. She would encounter Bowser Jr. in the hallway, playing on his Nintendo 3DS. The young koopa would look up and see Jigglypuff, wondering what business she wanted with him.
"Why are you looking at me like that, Jigglypuff?" questioned Bowser Jr, putting away his 3DS. "What's the matter, you wanna throw some hands? Wanna catch these hands?! If that's the case, then you're on! So what kind of hands do you want? Clown hands? Boxer hands? Manicured hands? Just tell me what you want, and I'll give it to ya! You'll be crying uncle before you could even..."
"Jigglypuff!" Jigglypuff would tag Bowser Jr, before sneaking away. Bowser Jr. would just stand there, frozen and dumbfounded, his arm shaking. How could he have allowed himself to be tagged like that?
"ARRRRGGGH CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT TAGGED!" Bowser Jr. threw a tantrum, as he punched a nearby wall. He then grabbed a nearby vase and was about to throw it on the floor, before having second thoughts and placing the vase back where it was. Having Mr. Game and Watch fix the hole in the wall was more worth it than having to replace a vase. After his tantrum, Bowser Jr. would return to a calm peace of mind. "No matter, I'll just tag one of my siblings and be done with it."
Bowser Jr's siblings - the seven Koopalings - were hiding in Morton's room, not wanting to involve themselves in the game of tag. They were afraid about the prospect of being tagged...those wimps. A knock was at the bedroom door.
"Door's open, come in," answered Wendy, as Bowser Jr. entered the room, smiling deviously. "Hello Bowser Jr. - is it safe to come outside now?" The smile on Bowser Jr.'s face was suggesting otherwise...
"Think the better question is...who wants to be it?" asked Bowser Jr, raising his hands up as his smile became even more devious. The scream of fear from the Koopalings only highlighted what would happen next...
Walking through the mansion was Lucario, and the aura Pokemon was spending some down time with his mate, Lopunny. The two had quite the romantic journey - first there was Gallade, then there was Gardevoir, and then the whole relapse Lucario went through upon learning that his love for Gardevoir wasn't meant to be. However, that didn't stop him on fully settling with Lopunny, and those two have been happy ever since.
"Figured that since you spend your days cooped up in the sanctuary, I could take you out for a walk around the mansion," Lucario would tell Lopunny, his arms behind his head. "We're having a game of tag right now, so I'll keep you as far away from the action as possible."
Lucario: Pfft, I'm a Pokemon, I don't need to play a game of tag. Baseball, maybe, but anything else, I'd rather not involve myself in.
"Lopunny!" Lopunny would alert Lucario, hearing some sounds coming from behind a nearby door. Lucario would press his ear against the door, and heard the Koopalings' voices. What were they saying?
"Tag, you're it, catch me if you can!"
"I believe it is YOU who is it, good sir!"
"How's it feel like it?" Can't tag me!"
"Lemmy, I choose you...uh, I mean, tag you're it!"
The last person to be tagged would be Lemmy, who exited the room feeling slightly light-headed as he closed the door behind him. Clearly the Koopalings were aggressive, just as Gil feared.
"You're...it..." Lemmy would tag Lucario, his last act before falling to the floor. He had a good run while it lasted.
"Welp, guess I'm it then..." sighed Lucario; so much for avoiding the action. "I'll be right back," Lucario would inform Lopunny as he left, leaving his rabbit Pokemon girlfriend alone with an unconscious Lemmy.
Wario was eating a bunch of onions by himself all alone, working out a strategy. His strategy? To release a giant fart cloud if someone dared to tag him. That way, the person who was it could be subdued, while Wario escaped in the thick cloud of his own flatulence. Disgusting, yet effective.
"One more onion should do it..." said Wario, ready to pop another onion into his mouth, before Lucario walked by and tapped him on the shoulder.
"You're it, Wario," Lucario would inform the fatso as he walked on. Wario would look around, wondering who could've tagged him. Didn't even have a chance to use his master plan!
"So I'm it now, huh?" said Wario, as he cracked his knuckles. The fatso would march on his way, and during his trek, he saw a cardboard box lying on the floor. Knowing who was hiding under it, Wario would approach the box...until Snake lifted it up to give the fatso a warning.
"Don't you even dare..." the former spy warned Wario, before putting the cardboard box back down. Wario would snap his fingers in disgust as he continued on his way, before seeing Bayonetta walk by. Now was his chance.
"Tag you're it!" Wario would smack the Umbra Witch, on the side of her leg. Bayonetta angrily turned around to face Wario, who was now shuddering in fear. "I didn't mean to hit you like that, honest! Please spare me!"
"Any other time I would make you cry for mercy..." said a still angry Bayonetta, before softening as she knelt down at Wario and stroked his chin. Wario was all kinds of confused. "But since things are a bit...competitive around here, I'll spare you for now." Bayonetta would tap Wario on the head before strolling down the hallway, as Wario remained in place, his eyes wide and his mouth agape.
Bayonetta: Guess you can call me a lioness at a zoo - you can look... *smiles seductively and strikes a pose* ...but you certainly can't touch!
Wario: *still frozen with his mouth agape*
As Bayonetta carried on with her stroll, she would encounter Olimar. The astronaut considered himself unworthy to be in Bayonetta's presence, so he turned ihis head away. Not an issue for Bayonetta to fix.
"Too shy to look at a pretty face like myself, hmm?" Bayonetta smiled as she reached Olimar, stroking his helmet. Olimar was getting shivers down his spine, his eyes wide open as he slowly turned to face Bayonetta. "You don't do so well around women, do you?"
"I get along well with the ladies - some more than others," replied R.O.B., its pupils growing wide. Bayonetta was making the robot feels all sorts of things that it shouldn't. "I am married after all, so it comes naturally..." Such a shame we don't know the name of Olimar's wife.
"So I see...never would imagine someone like yourself could get down with the ladies. How very cheeky. And while I'm at it...you're it." Bayonetta tapped Olimar's head before walking away, making the astronaut fall to the floor on his side. "Might wanna get a move on, ladies man! Lying on the floor like that won't do you any good!"
"Ladies man...how can I be a ladies man...I'm married..." Olimar would remain on the floor, as R.O.B. peered over him.
"IF YOU WANT...YOU CAN GO AHEAD AND TAG ME..." the robot said to Olimar, who tagged R.O.B. and took off his helmet, just so he could suck his thumb.
Sitting on the rooftop of the mansion was Meta Knight, who was more interested in watching the bright Seattle sun than playing tag with the others. Also on the rooftop was Nowi and Captain Falcon, the latter having been tagged by R.O.B. Nah deemed herself too mature to involve herself in Falcon and Nowi's shenanigans, so she wasn't present. The lovebirds were hidden from Meta Knight, spying on the Star Warrior from behind.
"Alright, Nowi, so what I want you to do is speak with Meta Knight, maybe talk about sports or something, and then I'll go in for the kill and tag Meta Knight!" Captain Falcon explained to his girlfriend. "Meta Knight will go bonkers, he'll be all like, 'WHY CAPTAIN FALCON, WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!' Then he'll laugh about it, and..."
"Has Meta Knight ever laughed before?" asked Nowi, unsure if Meta Knight even wanted to be tagged. The Star Warrior was being awfully distant more than usual today.
"I'm sure he has - he wears a mask 24/7, so it's hard to tell if he's laughing, crying, or the like. Now go and do your thing!"
So Nowi would tiptoe towards Meta Knight, trying to make as little sound as possible. However, Meta Knight had a very keen sense of hearing, and was able to detect Nowi making her move. So he pulled out his sword, and pointed it at Nowi, not looking back.
"One more move, and you're done for..." the Star Warrior threatened Nowi, who took several steps back out of caution. This would eventually set up an opening for Captain Falcon.
"Falcon...TAG!" the racer would aggressively tag Meta Knight, enough to make the Star Warrior fall to the ground. Captain Falcon shrieked in fright as he and Nowi checked on Meta Knight. "Meta Knight, are you okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine, Pit here broke my fall," responded Meta Knight, lying on top of Pit. That meant the angel was now it. "But I'll get you for this, Falcon!"
Flora: Why must be play a game of tag for...I doubt that I would even be good at it...what if nobody wishes to tag me? Oh, that would be dreadful...
Felicia: Flora, the point of tag is NOT to be tagged at all. Easier said that done. However, our maid duties always comes first before anything else!
Mr. Game and Watch, always on the job, was patching up the hole Bowser Jr. had created earlier. Flora and Felicia were nearby, sweeping the floors, with Dark Pit chilling out with Flora.
"Hey Dark Pit, you got a minute?" Pit would approach the doppelganger. Just exactly what Dark Pit wanted - someone to annoy him.
"Uh, sure, what's up?" asked Dark Pit, willing to entertain Pit - as long as he was up to something good. Too bad the opposite would happen.
"Tag you're it!" Pit would tag Dark Pit, before running down the hall and taking flight. An angered Dark Pit would chase after Pit, but ultimately decided it wasn't worth it. Why waste his time and energy on Pit for?
"You may have won this round Pit, but you won't be so fortunate next time!" Unsure if Pit heard him or not, Dark Pit would return to his usual spot, but not before tagging Mr. Game and Watch. "I would tag Flora, but I'm afraid I would somehow make her cry, so you're it, Mr. GW."
"Knew I would be it soon..." remarked Mr. Game and Watch, although him being it didn't stop him from patching the hole. Groundskeeping work always came first.
Poor Cilan was all depressed after wasting his chili, thanks to the Inklings. The connoisseur was seated in the kitchen in his now clean clothes, moping as he watched the Ice Climbers preparing to make some smoothies.
"Cheer up Cilan, wasting that chili wasn't your fault," Nana did her best to cheer up the connoisseur, as she was loading up on the ingredients. "You have nothing to be sad about!"
"Nana's right, Cilan - your chili would've sucked anyways, at least in comparison to our smoothies," stated Popo, receiving a nudge from Nana. Said nudge didn't stop Popo from talking. "Also you're a pretty overrated chef anyways, so it's not like..." Popo would receive another nudge from Nana - this time more forceful - and it shut him up for good.
"I wonder who hasn't been tagged yet..." wondered Mr. Game and Watch, as he entered the kitchen. He saw the Ice Climbers making preparations for their smoothies, and saw Popo plugging up the blender. "Tag you're it!" Mr. GW would tag the Ice Climber before bolting out of the kitchen, as Popo gritted his teeth.
"You know what, bump this!" he shouted, as he tagged Nana. Nana, in retalation, would tag Popo right back. The Ice Climbers would constantly tag each other, until the Flying Man showed up and did something out of the ordinary.
"Stop it right now...for neither of you are it!" the mythical beast would place his hands on Nana and Popo, making himself it. The Ice Climbers looked up at the Flying Man, both confused.
"Flying Man...why did you make yourself it?" Nana would ask the beast out of curiosity. There were many things the Flying Man would do that would make you question his motives.
"Because, foolish child, I am your courage! You had a huge burden resting on your shoulders, and because of me, I took said burden off of you and placed it on me. Now it is my civic duty to put this burden on someone else, for the sake of this game of tag. I must be off now - Flying Man, away!" And so the Flying Man would dash out of the kitchen, as the Ice Climbers glanced at one another in pure bewilderment.
Flying Man: Being "it" is like being public enemy #1 - everyone treats you like a bubonic plague for a period of time, until you're a good guy again. Being a good guy myself, I cannot afford to be it any longer, which means I must search for a new public enemy #1, and in due time!
The new "public enemy #1" would be Villager, who was spotted fishing near the mansion lake by the Flying Man. The Flying Man would tag the youngster, scolding him for not participating in the game of tag, before flying away to "deal out justice". Villager would return to the mansion, and upon his return, he suddenly felt the need to use the bathroom.
"Hurry up in there, I gotta go!" the youngster stood outside the door of the nearest bathroom, holding his bladder and doing the pee-pee dance. It's 2018, and not a single person has patented that very dance.
"Okay, okay, don't rush me - almost done!" Wolf's voice could be heard from behind the bathroom door. Once the mercenary flushed the toilet and washed his hands, he would exit the bathroom...
"TAG YOU'RE IT!" ...only for Villager to tag him as he rushed inside the bathroom, slamming the door shut. Wolf angrily stomped his foot, as Villager felt relieved.
"Outsmarted by a stupid kid, how despicable of me!" Wolf walked down the hallway, angry that he allowed himself to be tagged like that. "Should've seen it coming..." added Wolf, seeing Takamaru coming his way.
"Hey Wolf, why do you look so angry?" the samurai would ask the space mercenary. "I take it you're it?"
"Sadly I am it...but I'm not it any longer!" Wolf would tag Takamura, no longer angry as he cackled. "Have fun being it, samurai boy!" Wolf would keep cackling as he walked away, leaving Takamaru in the dust.
It was almost two o' clock, and Takamaru was looking for someone to tag. He would find a victim or two, when he spotted the Black Knight in a room, sipping his tea in peace. Takamaru was about to make a move, until...
"Takamaru what are you doing man?" Sora would ask the samurai from behind, grabbing his attention. Takamaru turned around, just as he was about to tag the Black Knight. "You want to join his tea party?"
"I'd love to, but I need to tag someone, and the Black Knight is leaving himself open," explained Takamaru, fearing that Sora might blow his opportunity. "A light tap on his shoulder should do the trick."
"Attention everyone - the game of tag will end in one minute!" announced Master Hand, his voice booming through the mansion. "One minute until the game of tag is over! So whoever's it right now...better go tag someone!"
"Drat, I'm not taking any chances...you're it, Sora!" Takamaru would quickly tag Sora, before running away. Time was winding down, and Sora now found himself in quite a predicament.
"Takamaru where are you going, you can't do me like that!" Sora called out to Takamura, who was now out of sight. Sora groaned, as he stormed off...
...until he heard an elevator door ding nearby. An idea spurred in Sora's head once he heard the sound.
"Oh, I know, I'll just tag whoever exits the elevator door, and then I'm no longer it!" said the Keyblade wielder, as he went to the elevator door. Once the door opened, Sora would put out his hand and exclaim, "Tag you're it!" ...only for his face to fall when he saw the person he tagged.
"Alright people, time's up!" announced Master Hand, as Sora felt like he screwed up big time. "The game of tag is now officially over! We shall crown the new head of the Smash Mansion pronto!"
"New head of the Smash Mansion, eh?" smirked the man Sora tagged - a sharply dressed man wearing a suit with a rainbow-colored R on it. "If my suspicions serve me correct, I must be the new leader of the Smash Mansion!"
Who was this man Sora tagged, you might ask? He was the leader of Team (Rainbow) Rocket...the man known as Giovanni.