Smash Life Chapter 232: Episode 232: VaultHunters, a super smash brothers fanfic

Author's Note:

This is a chapter that I've been anticipating, for quite some time...a chapter revolved around Xenoblade Chronicles, Borderlands, Bioshock Infinite, Shante and the Seven Sirens, and XCOM. All I can say is...thank goodness Saints Row wasn't released on the Switch. That would've made things complicated. Now for some guest reviews:

"Will Lip and the other Panel de Pon characters show up? (Since their game got released for Nintendo Switch Online). Is Joker gonna give Caroline and Justine a tour of the mansion when they show up? (Persona 5 Royal has him taking them to different places). Has Haru had any screen time? Will Kronya get some sort of appearance? (Since Fire Emblem Heroes made her playable). Is Symmetra from Overwatch gonna cause problems if she shows up? (Shes obsessed with bringing order and ridding chaos). And finally, will any Telethia enemies show up for the Xenoblade chapter?"

Lip is already here, but the other Panel de Pon characters might show up. Joker will give the warden twins a tour of the mansion. Haru hasn't had any screen time as of late. Kronya might make an appearance. Symmetra might cause problems, if she shows up. And sadly, I couldn't fit any Telethia enemies in this chapter. Next is pspires03:

"i have an idea for a chapter based on something i went through when i was younger. sonic gets bored with nothing to do so he watches a cartoon with the Koopalings called Lego ninjago masters of spinjitzu and starts getting hooked to the show. his favorite character being Lloyd garmadon. he decides to go into the show to feel what it's like to be a ninja. i know sonic would like it because of how adventurous the show is and i know how adventurous sonic is."

Uh...sure. Last up is Gamergalaxy689:

"Me ask one question, why Crash in the mansion? Me thought that mansion was for Smashers and Spirits! Did you put him in mansion bacause N. Sane Trilogy is on switch?"

I love Crash...that is all.

Episode 232: VaultHunters

As revealed in the previous episode, Cortex desired to make a rousing speech to the residents, to remove any doubt and prove to everyone that he was a great candidate for the man of the mansion job. The evil genius got a Zoroark from the Pokemon sanctuary to find a dictionary, and and write down as many big words he could find in said dictionary.

And with that list of words, Cortex entrusted someone to write out his speech...and that someone, apparently was Pit.

This was met with negative reception from Brio, who didn't believe that Pit couldn't get the job done for obvious reasons. Brio often asked Cortex if he could write the speech himself, only for Cortex to turn him down every time. It wasn't until Cortex read the final draft of the speech Pit wrote that he realized a huge mistake was made.

"Still wish you hadn't picked Pit now?" Uka sneered at Cortex, who was looking over the speech in his room with Brio. It was Cortex's third time reading over the speech, and he couldn't believe the atrocity he was reading.

"I can't read this anymore...this is unacceptable," replied Cortex, unable to read anymore as he threw the papers unto his bed. "The handwriting is horrendous, and some of the words I asked Pit to use were used out of context!"

"It's almost like this sort of thing could've been prevented." Cortex fired a quick glare at Uka, not wanting to hear the floating mask's sass. "You're the one here making the mistakes, not me..."

"If it's too late, Dr. Cortex, I can write your speech for you," Brio proposed to Cortex, wanting to prove his worth; he was Cortex's VP, after all. "Already written out the first page!"

"Don't waste your time, Brio..." Cortex said to the evil genius, who felt bummed out as he snapped his fingers in disgust. "...I can't just throw the speech away, it would wreck Pit's confidence as a campaign manager! We need to find a way to rewrite that speech."

"I figured you would say that...which is why I asked Pit to seek out two gentlemen who can help you. Not only they can help you rewrite the entire speech...but they can also assist in public speaking."

"Brio, my friend, you are an absolute genius! Always thinking one step ahead! Where would I be without you?"

"Dead, obviously," muttered Uka, as Cortex glared at the floating mask once more. 'What, is honesty a thing of the past now?"

"I've already sent Pit to retrieve the two men, with the teleportation device," Brio explained to Cortex. "Didn't tell him what we needed the men for...we'll keep it a secret from him."

Pit was at the teleportation room right now, as Geo Stelar was getting the teleportation device booted up. The angel had a slip of paper in his hand, which had the names of the two men Brio spoke of inscribed.

Pit: Gave Cortex the final draft of his speech. I was unable to see Cortex's initial reaction, but later I saw him in the bathroom, holding the speech while crying his eyes out. The speech I wrote was so beautiful, that it reduced a grown man to tears... *smiles proudly*

"Know anything abut the two guys that Pit wants?" Omega-Xis asked Geo Stelar, who was busy keying in the coordinates on the device.

"From what I've heard, one guy is a businessman with a murderous streak," replied Geo Stelar, the thought of bringing over a murderer concerning Omega-Xis. "The other guy is from 1912." How very descriptive.

"Why are we bringing a murderer to the mansion for? I got a bad feeling about this..." Omega-Xis' concern certainly didn't stop Geo from doing his thing.

"Chill out, Omega-Xis! Master Hand's not here, so it's fair game now." Geo looked over at Pit, giving the angel a thumbs up. "Device's ready to go!"

"Awesome!" exclaimed Pit, as he walked towards the teleportation device. "I can't wait to see the two dudes in..." Suddenly the angel tripped over a cord, falling to the floor.

"Woah, are you okay, Pit?" Geo came over to check on the angel, before helping him up to his feet. "That looked like a pretty nasty fall!"

"Yeah, I'm fine, no worries..." Pit looked at the power cord he tripped on, and saw that it was now disconnected from the teleportation device - which was now starting to boot up. "...uh, it won't matter about that power cord being unplugged, right?"

"I mean, all the other cords are connected...so we'll be just fine. Just as long as those two dudes show up on the teleportation pad."

"We'll just have to see about that..." remarked Omega-Xis, as he watched the teleportation device very carefully.

Shulk had some pretty big plans today, for one of his good friends was coming to stop by...Melia, the wonderful mage from Alcamoth. The homs, Dunban, Fiora, and Riki all waited for Melia's arrival in the foyer, playing some cards to pass the time. As Shulk was schooling the others in spades, the Homs heard the doorbell rang.

"That must be her!" exclaimed Shulk, putting down his cards and getting up as he ran to the front door. The Homs opened the door, and instead of Melia...he saw Shantae standing on the porch, with some friends of hers.

"Hi Shulk!" Shantae waved to the Homs, remembering him from the happy hour at the steakhouse. Shulk went from excited to disappointed real quick.

"Oh, it's just you..." Shulk sounded very disappointed in his voice, which alarmed Shantae greatly and made Shulk change his tune. "...oh, what I mean to say is, it's good to see you Shantae! I see you brought some friends."

"You never met them before, have you?" Shantae looked around at her friends, who were all half-genies just like her. "That's Harmony, and this right here is Zapple, and there's Vera, and Plink...and the one with the green skin is Fillin the Blank."

"Fillin the Blank?" Shulk couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at that one. Such a peculiar name. "That's a...very interesting name there."

"Ah, there you ladies are!" someone exclaimed from the back of the foyer, before running to the front door. Shulk was suddenly shoved to the side by Waluigi, who greeted the half-genies at the door. "Shantae and friends, how you do?"

"We're doing just fine!" smiled Shantae, before turning around to face her understandably judgmental half-genie pals. "This is Waluigi, the funny lanky man I've been telling you all about."

"Funny in a good, humorous way...or a bad way?" inquired Harmony, who at first glance thought that Waluigi looked like a sex offender. Could be the mustache.

Harmony: Shantae sure knows how to pick some very eccentric friends. I thought her sparring partner Bolo was an oddball, but this Waluigi creep just might take the cake. And I don't use the word creep liberally either.

"Right this way, ladies - the Wah-Man train is now chugging along!" said Waluigi as he led the half-genies inside the mansion, all of them giggling save for Harmony. "CHOO CHOO!" After Waluigi and the half-genies left, Shulk pulled himself up on his feet.

"Sorry about that, you guys...false alarm," the Homs apologized to Dunban, Fiora, Riki who came over to the front door. "Really gave your hopes up."

"That should teach you not to get so excited," Dunban advised Shulk, as he dusted off the Homs' clothes. "You act like you haven't seen Melia in ages."

"Yeah, it's only been three months since we last saw Melia," added Fiora, as Shulk shook off his hair for any dust that might be in it. "Three months isn't that long."

"It's long for certain people, myself included," said Shulk, before looking out through the open front door as if he expected to show up Melia in the next second. "Also, Melia won't be messing around with Tharja this time around. She'll be her own woman!"

"I'll be my own what now?" a voice inquired in the foyer, alerting Shulk and company. Shulk excitedly turned around, and saw Melia standing alone by herself.

"Melia!" Shulk shouted out the mage's name, as he and the others ran over to greet Melia. "It's about time you showed up. We've been waiting..."

"Sorry about that. I had to come in through the backdoor, since Copper and Booker refused to let me in." Possibly because of Melia's previous alliance with Tharja. "That Captain Falcon is so kind..."

"I see you've already found your friends," Captain Falcon said to Melia, grinning as he showed up at the foyer. "You really must've wanted to see 'em!"

"Melia agreed to spend time with us today," Riki explained to Captain Falcon, who was standing with his hands on his hips. "Fun and friendliness all around!"

"Sounds like a great way to spend a Friday afternoon! But Melia, I've meant to ask you this earlier...why does your voice sound different? Went through puberty or something?"

"...I don't understand what you mean," replied a confused Melia, who didn't know where Captain Falcon was getting at. Falcon bit his bottom lip, not wanting to look foolish in front of Melia's friends.

"It's just...you sound more womanly than usual. Not that you were sounding like that before, but what I'm trying to say is...ah, forget it." Captain Falcon saved himself some face and ran away, out of slight humiliation.

"That was a strange question," remarked Shulk, before turning to face Melia. "So Melia, what do you wanna do today?"

"I made a few friends on Bionis that I want you all to see," replied Melia, as she led her friends to the living room. "I'm sure you'll like them!"

Captain Falcon ran through the hallway, too clouded by his foolishness to slow down anytime soon. The racer zipped past Link and Cloud, nearly running into the swordsmen.

"No running in the hallways, Captain Falcon!" Link shouted at the racer running down the hallway, before shaking his head. "Great, now I sound more like a school hall monitor..."

"I think it'll take some time getting used to," said Cloud, as he and Link kept on walking down the hallway. "Provided you don't pull a Spongebob on the others."

"Are you implying that you watch Spongebob...?" As Link stopped to look at Cloud, Cloud saw Lucario coming towards him and Link, looking like he was in a rush.

"Hey Lucario, what's up?" Cloud asked the aura Pokemon, who reached the two swordsmen in time. "What fun things are going on at the mansion today?"

"The teleportation device has apparently gone haywire," explained Lucario - no doubt Pit might have something to do with it. "Come and check it out..."

Lucario took Link and Cloud to the teleportation room entrance, where there was a bunch of flashing lights emitting from the doorway. Link and Cloud watched closely, as a man with a Mohawk exited the room with a mask over his face.

"What the..." Cloud furrowed his brow, squinting as he made out the mask the Mohawk man was wearing. "...why do I feel like I've seen that mask before?"

"Face McShooty is here!" the masked man, aptly named Face McShooty, shouted as was moving around like a maniac. "Someone please shoot me in the FACE! In the the FACE! FACEFACEFACEFACEFACE!"

"Someone brought a menace to society to our mansion..." remarked Link, as McShooty ran down the hallway begging for someone to shoot him in the face. Then there was another flash from the teleportation room, as a rough-looking blonde girl ran out.

"Playtime's over, suckers!" the girl shouted, arriving at the mansion strapped with two guns in her hands. She saw Lucario and company staring at her, and pointed her guns at them. "Which one of you wants to die first at the hands of Tiny Tina?"

"First off, whoever said that any of us were dying?" questioned Lucario, who didn't feel like holding his hands up. Thought it would be a sign of weaknesses. "Also...who are you?"

"What?! You punks don't even know my name?! I'm Tiny Tina, the most deadliest and destructive thirteen-year old in all of Pandora!"

Cloud: *shakes his head* That is not a thirteen-year old.

"You know what? I'm not even gonna waste my energy killing you three!" said Tina, as she wished to save her ammo for someone else. "I'm gonna kill someone who actually deserves it!"

"Tina, where on earth are you?" someone with a robotic voice called out to the teenager, who was now on high alert. "Don't tell me you got that far from here!"

"Gotta go - can't let that dumb scrap of metal see me. He'll have my head for sure!" Tina ran off, hoping to cause some amount of destruction before heading back to Pandora. Destruction was her thing, in case you wouldn't tell.

"Looks like the teleportation device seems to have calmed down," observed Link, as it was all quiet in the teleportation room with no more flashes. Soon a robot maneuvering on a wheel exited the teleportation room, scratching its head.

"Ooh...I've let Tina run loose, this is simply not good," the robot remarked, before turning around to see Lucario and company. "Oh, hello there! It is I, Claptrap, your friendly neighborhood general purpose robot."

"Hasn't even been a minute and that robot is ticking me off..." Cloud whispered to Link...the swordsman literally has no idea. Lucario approached Claptrap, looking for some answers.

"You were in that room when that device was acting up, correct?" the aura Pokemon asked Claptrap, who nodded his head the best way he could. "Why was it acting like that?"

"Beats me - I was just minding my own business, practicing my superb breakdancing moves, when I was zapped here. Along with the Vault Hunters.

"Vault Hunters? How many of them were teleported to the mansion?" Claptrap started to think, as he was tapping his head in thought.

"I can't really tell...only because I don't feel like counting. Math is hard. But they are pretty dangerous!"

"We shall never speak of that again..." Omega-Xis said to Geo Stelar, who exited the teleportation room with his face covered in soot. That teleportation device really must've gone haywire.

"Geo, Omega-Xis...what happened with the device?" Lucario asked the duo, as Geo wiped away the soot from his face. "Was it malfunctioning?"

"Pit tripped on a power cord earlier, and unplugged it from the device. Geo thought it was no big deal...but then the device started teleporting people at random. Now's all calmed down..."

"I never said it was no big deal..." Geo defended himself, frowning at Omega-Xis. "...I was merely implying it. Huge difference."

"So Pit tripping on a power cord caused all of this..." analyzed Link, who was sure that Pit would be punished later for his recklessness. "...always stirring up trouble."

"Is there anything that my friend and I can do?" Cloud asked Claptrap; if the "guests" brought over were anything like Tiny Tina, things at the mansion today would be very chaotic.

"What you can do is round up those Vault Hunters," replied Claptrap, fearing for the safety and well-being of those inside the mansion. "Round 'em up, and take them to a confined place. Hopefully they wouldn't be tempted to kill each other, in said space..."

"Device's busted, so I'm gonna get a repair man to fix it," said Geo; obviously he couldn't be trusted to fix anything around the mansion.

"We'll round up all the crazies," Link said to Lucario, as he and Cloud left the premises. "If you need anything, just let us know."

"Will do," Lucario nodded his head, as Geo and Omega-Xis went back inside the teleportation room to clean up some of their mess. That left Lucario alone in the hallway...with Claptrap.

"So it's just the two of us, huh?" squealed Claptrap, having the sudden urge to randomly break into song. "Just the two of us...we can make it if we try..." Claptrap sang his robotic heart out, as Lucario facepalmed.

Mario was up in his bathroom, using his shaver in front of his mirror. The plumber noticed a few follicles of hair around his mouth, and started to panic. Although those follicles would mean nothing to any other man, it was quite a big deal for Mario, who strongly resented growing a beard.

"No lie, you would look amazing with a beard," Cappy said to Mario, who always thought otherwise for as long as he had his iconic mustache. "Everyone would call you Macho Mario!"

"Cappy, if we weren't best-a friends, I'd cut you out of my life-a forever," Mario told the talking hat, before wiping away the remaining shaving cream from his face. The plumber let out a happy sigh, when he saw his clean-shaven face in front of the mirror.

"Mario, can you come downstairs?" Peach called out to her husband from the living room. "We have a visitor - he really wants to speak with you!"

"Now that's taken care off, I can finally show-a my face around Peach again." Mario hummed a happy tune, as he left the hospital. "I bet Peach is showering our guest-a with plenty of hospitality!"

Mario would make his way down the stairs and to the living room, where Peach was gathered with Spyro and Hunter. Upon arrival, Mario did not at all expect to see a man sitting on his living room couch who, judging by his attire, worked for the government.

"Ah, good afternoon Mario...I've been waiting for you," the man greeted Mario, who assumed he was in trouble. Mario felt like a high school student accused of plagiarism, in this very moment.

"Wh-Who is this-a man?" Mario asked Peach, as he pointed at the man in question. "Why did you let-a him in my house?"

"That's Central Officer John Bradford - he's the executive commander of this organization called XCOM," Peach introduced the man to Mario, who now thought that he was getting arrested. "They specialize in hunting aliens!"

"Hunting down aliens is XCOM's specialty," Bradford explained to Mario, as he got up from the couch and walked towards Mario. "Originally it was started by the government to..."

"Hold up...did you just-a say aliens?" Mario interrupted, having a hunch for whoever in his house invited Bradford. "What do you think I have-a to do with this?!"

"The talking cheetah over there alleged that you came in contact with aliens, two weeks ago." Mario frowned even harder, as he glared at Hunter. "He made a distress call to XCOM the day after the incident, but we overlooked it until earlier this week."

"Tried to stop him..." Spyro said to Mario concerning Hunter, who innocently grinned and shrugged his shoulders.

Mario: National Geographic is literally ruining Hunter...why did National Geographic have to go down-a the drain? I personally blame-a reality TV, it's the source of all-a our societal problems. That, and social media.

"Mind telling me about the two aliens you came in contact with?" Bradford asked Mario, hoping to pry a few answers out from the plumber. "What were their names? Laurence Nelson and Alice MacGregor?"

"Laurence Nelson and-a Alice MacGregor are NOT aliens," confirmed Mario, already having enough of Bradford as well as Hunter's alien paranoia. "They're just-a regular human beings, like you and me."

"The people that worked for Laurence and Alice could theoretically be aliens," stated Hunter, piquing Bradford's interest as Mario frowned at the cheetah. "The Wonderful 101, that's what they were called..."

"The Wonderful 101?" said Bradford as he held his finger underneath his chin, looking down at the floor in deep thought. "They are superheroes...so them being aliens is quite plausible."

"I can assure-a you they are not aliens either," Mario informed Bradford, wanting the commander to go back home and not waste his time. "Sure they have-a superpowers, but that doesn't mean-a that..."

'The least I could do is investigate, and see if the Wonderful Ones are truly alien. Our best move is to interrogate anyone who has ever come in contact with them."

"Yeah, great strategy!" cheered Hunter, as he applauded Bradford for his decision-making. Spyro looked at the cheetah in disbelief, and shook his head.

"Whenever you're ready, Mario, we'll go to the mansion together, and see if anyone there came in contact with the Wonderful 101. They can give us some clues..."

"It'll be a fruit-a less effort..." Mario tried to warn Bradford, who refused to stop until his newfound suspicions were confirmed. "...but what-a ever brings this silliness to an end."

To many of those on the planet of Pandora, Claptrap was the most annoying being in existence. Lucario would learn that the hard way, as the aura Pokemon was working with Claptrap against his will. He walked with the robot through the mansion, very much annoyed.

"So this guy was engulfed in flames, and he had this kill streak going on...'cause he was ON FIRE!" Claptrap cracked his pun to Lucario, who responded with a groan. "Aw, why didn't you laugh? That was comedy gold!"

"Why did you choose to be with me..." wondered Lucario, rubbing his hand down his face; never has the aura Pokemon been this annoyed by anyone before.

"Because you're too much of a lone wolf! What you need is a friend. But who even needs a friend anyways, they always come and go! Screw those guys!"

"Shush...I see some more visitors." Lucario would pull Claptrap to the side, and peeked behind the wall he was standing behind. In the hallway, Lucario saw Lucina speaking with a man and woman; both looked like they came from a distant past.

"You say that the Founders are not in this establishment?" the man asked Lucina, as he and the woman were trying to get a sense of their new surroundings.

"No, I'm afraid not...this is 2020," replied Lucina, catching the man and woman by surprise. "The guys you're talking about are probably dead by now."

"Did we...did we travel over a hundred years into the future?" questioned the woman, who didn't expect to be a part of any time travel shenanigans. "Must've been that elevator we took...and that strange device we came out from."

"Pardon me, you two," Lucario said to the man and woman, as he and Claptrap made their appearing. "You both came here from over a hundred years ago, you said?"

"Yes, my lady and I came here from Columbia, in 1912," the man confirmed, finding Lucario to be a very strange and unusual human. "The name's Booker DeWitt, and this is Elizabeth."

"You both sure look cute together," Claptrap said to Booker and Elizabeth, and it was hard to tell which one of the two was more offended. "Are you a couple?"

"We're not a couple, we can assure you," replied Elizabeth with a warm smile, before looking at Lucario and looking at him peculiarly. "What kind of species are you?"

"I'm...I'm an Anubis," replied Lucario; he could tell Elizabeth what he really was, but that would make things even more confusing.

Booker: Just spoke with a talking Anubis, of Egyptian legend...and now I and speaking in front of a "digital" camera. I have officially seen everything at this place.

"Do you know if the Founders are here?" Booker asked Lucario and Claptrap, as he was looking out for the safety of Elizabeth. "They could've followed us."

"No, but I know a place where you two can be safe," replied Lucario, ready to flex his powers as a man of the mansion candidate. "Ike knows what I'm talking about."

"I do?" Lucina raised an eyebrow at Lucario, and it only took the swordswoman a few seconds to understand what Lucario was referring to. "Oh yes, I do! No worries, you two - we got you covered!"

"These people are already scaring me..." Booker spoke quietly with Elizabeth, as the two followed Lucina, Lucario, and Claptrap down the hallway.

Pit had yet to return to Cortex's room, with the two men that Brio asked the angel to retrieve. So to pass the time, Cortex brushed his pet goose; granted it was impossible, but the evil genius was determined to get it done.

"Drat, double drat! How was Itsuki able to sell off Master Hand's Lamborghini before I could?" growled Cortex, who had a few things to get off his chest. "That money could've been contributed to my campaign!"

"As if your campaign needed money anyways," retorted Uka, as if anyone would ever donate to Cortex's campaign. "Why didn't you get the car keys to the Lamborghini, and then go from there?"

"I asked that Zoroark to get those car keys, and he failed! I might've put too much trust in him..."

"Dr. Cortex, Dr. Brio, I have returned!" Pit announced from outside Cortex's room, not even acknowledging Uka. Such disrespect. "And I got the two dudes you asked for, Brio! Had to treat them to some lunch. Now give a warm welcome...to Handsome Jack and Zachary Hale Comstock!"

Entering the room with Pit were two men, with differing appearances; one was an old suit-wearing man with a beard, the other a businessman with a disfigured face. The old man would greet Cortex first.

"Zachary Hale Comstock," the old man introduced himself to Cortex, gingerly shaking the evil genius' hand. "God bless you, good sir..."

"Yeah, yeah...my turn!" the disfigured businessman said to Comstock, brushing the old man to the side and shaking Cortex's hand. "Call me Handsome Jack! Coolest guy you'll ever meet!"

"I'll have to be the judge of that..." responded Cortex, as Handsome Jack stopped the handshake and glared down the evil genius. "...I was just kidding!" And then the handshake continued, as Jack's glare vanished away.

"I wanted to bring you two here today, to help my good friend Dr. Cortex," Brio explained to Handsome Jack and Comstock, with Cortex waving slightly to show off how friendly he was. "You see, Cortex wishes to be the alpha male of this mansion - the Smash Mansion."

"That midget wants to be a leader?" snorted Handsome Jack, taking a jab at Cortex's height. "Those headless guys at Pandora are more qualified than him!"

"Um...interesting. Anyways, Cortex believes that with a rousing speech, he can generate enough support to win the job. Which is why you two are here, to..."

"Woah, woah, woah...let's get something straight here." Handsome Jack was already laying down the law, seemingly wanting to do things his way. "I know I didn't come from some planet with violence and destruction...just to help Mr. Giant Chrome Dome Man with his crappy speech!"

"Now you listen here, hot stuff!" Cortex snapped on Handsome Jack, shaking his fist angrily at the businessman. "Sure my speech sucks...no offense, Pit...but what good is it if it can't be improved?"

"Alright you two, let's simmer down!" Pit said to Cortex and Handsome Jack, playing peacemaker as he stepped in between the two. "I think we can all find some kind of common ground..."

"I'd say we ditch the speech entirely," Comstock spoke up, making his opinion loud and clear as he commanded everyone's attention. "Sometimes actions speak much louder than words."

"So I don't need a speech, to rile up the residents?" inquired Cortex, only for Comstock to put his hand on the evil genius' shoulder and look at him in the eye.

"Dr. Cortex, what you need to do more than anything is to command respect from your underlings. Use your God-given power to subject people to your command, and they'll gravitate towards you. That, good sir, is the way."

"Wouldn't say that the residents are my 'underlings'...but I like your approach!" Uka seemed to like Comstock's approach to, as he nodded in approval.

Uka: Comstock seems like an alright guy...he has the kind of conviction in his voice that could move a mountain. Cortex never speaks with conviction, he just rambles on and on and expects - no, hopes - that somebody is listening to him. And when ninety percent of your evil monologues are geared towards a bandicoot...

"Your main focus should be to turn this mansion into a living shrine to yourself," Comstock continued to speak with Cortex, selling the evil genius on his idea. "Much like how I made the floating city of Columbia a living shrine to me!"

"So we're doing this, we're actually working with this pint-sized creep..." Handsome Jack shook his head, before throwing his arms up in defeat. "...whatever, not like I got anything better to do."

"Then it's settled!" exclaimed Pit, who was acting like he was running things now. "Zachary Hale Comstock, Handsome Jack...you two lead the way!"

Samus was working hard as always in the workshop, perfecting another machine of hers. The bounty hunter was so focused on her work, that she failed to notice Tina creeping her way inside the workshop with a demented smile.

"He would bother me when I'm busy..." grumbled Samus, as she heard Tina's footsteps in the workshop. "...Sonic, for the last time, I don't want a chili dog!" Samus turned around and instead saw Tina, who stopped in her tracks.

"'Sup sucka?" Tina greeted Samus as she pointed her guns at the bounty hunter. Mostly out of habit. "Can I borrow some scrap metal parts? Pretty please? I need some to make my bombs go BOOM!"

"I don't know, I don't do business with crazy people." Samus turned around and resumed her work, but Tina was still standing in place with her guns...which made Samus turn back around. "Can you just...go?"

"Either you give me some metal, or I will eat all your babies...ALL OF THEM!" Tina was closely eyeing the metal parts on Samus' desk, unable to break her gaze.

"Fine...take how much you want, and leave." Tina giggled happily, as she gathered several parts of metal in her arms. "Now go away, and leave me alone..."

"Your service is much appreciated, m'lady! I'll make sure to invite you to one of my tea parties, in the future..." And with that, Tina left the workshop, as Samus heaved a heavy sigh.

"Amazing how I've yet to lose my sanity..." As Samus resumed her work, another person from Pandora entered the workshop...Face McShooty.

"Hey you, yeah you!" McShooty approached Samus, getting all up in the bounty hunter's grill. "You got a gun? Good! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE!"

"No thanks, not interested." Samus moved away from McShoooty, and McShooty would move along with the bounty hunter.

"C'mon, just one time! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! WANT IT, NEED IT, LOVE IT! I beg of you, just SHOOT ME IN THE FACE!"

"Sometimes I wonder if life is even worth living anymore..." Samus did her best to ignore McShooty, no matter how adamant the masochist was.

Shulk and friends were in the living room, getting to meet some of Melia's friends. Those friends were actually two Nopons, named Kino and Nene. Naturally, Riki was familiar with the two young Nopons.

"Kino and Nene, they are my children!" explained Riki, before looking at Melia with a face of gratitude. "Thank you for bringing children to mansion! Great family affair!"

"You're welcome, Riki!" Melia smiled in response, as she looked at Kino the Nene; the former was much more reserved than the latter. "You have way more children than we give you credit for."

"Well he did say that he has eleven kids..." remarked Shulk, before he heard someone in the living room building something. "...you guys hear that?" Shulk and friends looked over...

...and saw Tina, with her metal scrap parts, crafting her explosive bombs. Shulk and friends watched from the distance, wondering where Tina came from.

"You let just about anyone inside this mansion, don't you?" Melia asked her friends, wondering if moving out was the right move.

"It's mostly not our fault," replied Shulk, making sure there was an ample amount of distance between Tina and his friends. "We're too laid-back for our own good."

"Any one of you want to test out my bombs?" Tina asked Shulk and company, approaching them with an in-progress bomb. "Mushy Snugglebites will be very upset if you don't be my test dummies!"

"Then he'll just have to remain upset," replied Dunban, as he and the others cautiously left the living room to avoid Tina. "Who on earth is Mushy Snugglebites...?"

"MUSHY SNUGGLEBITES HATES ALL OF YOU!" Tina called out to the retreating Dunban and company, with an angry scowl on her face. "No tea parties for them..."

"Tina? Is that you, girl? Man, you had us all worried! What are you doing all alone?"

Tina let out a happy gasp, as she turned around and saw three familiar friends enter the living room. Friends she had made back in Pandora - a red-haired woman, a big muscular dude, and a marksman.

"Hooray, the gang is reunited!" cheered Tina, after she gently placed her bomb on the floor. Would've been disastrous if she dropped it all willy-nilly. "A family affair!"

"I...wouldn't call it a family affair," remarked the red-haired woman - the Siren known as Lilith. "But we are a pretty close-knit group, so..."

"Pretty close-knit?" scoffed the muscular man, Brick, as he frowned at Lilith. "Man, we hang out so much, we should be brothers and sisters!"

"I thought you argued against that a long time ago," the marksman, who was named Mordecai, said to Brick. "If my memory serves me correct..."

"Your memory freaking sucks, Mordi-Mom!" Tina shouted at Mordecai, who hated the moniker "Mordy-Mom" with a burning passion. "And you have a buttface!"

"Tina how many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?! And I am not your mother!"

"Hey, don't talk to your mother like that!" Brick scolded Tina, putting the teenager in her place. "Can't just call other people names!"

"You're not helping..." Mordecai seethed at Brick, for encouraging Tina's erratic behavior.

Brick: Hey, Mordecai...since we're on camera, we should tell the folks at home a story!
Mordecai: *sighs* Is it the one where you punched a guy?
Brick: Oh no, this is an entirely different story. One day, I kicked a guy, in his shin. *pauses*
Mordecai: Was that the entire stor...
Brick: Yup! *smiles*

"Not sure if you guys are aware, but apparently Handsome Jack is in this building," Lilith said to her group, giving them a heads-up. "Saw a glimpse of him with an old guy, and some angel..."

"A old guy and some angel?" Brick furrowed his brow, finding it some very strange company that Handsome Jack was hanging around with. "Sounds like a bunch of Slabs! Or at the very least Slabs in disguise."

"I'd say we BLOW EM UP!" shouted Tina as she proudly held her bomb, for the others to see. "Make 'em go cry for their mommies...if we don't kill them."

"Let's hold on on the bombs, for now," Mordecai advised Tina, who pouted as she placed the bomb back on the floor. Without letting it explode. "Besides, I'd hate to be liable for any destruction to this place..."

"Mordecai's right - our MO right now is finding out where Handsome Jack is," stated Lilith, who had quite the score to settle with the evil businessman. "We can hold off on the destruction for later."

Melia took Shulk and the others outside to the backyard, to introduce them to a bunch of other Nopons. There was a group of Nopons outside, all of them dressed up as typical explorers.

"They call themselves the Nopongers," Melia explained to Shulk and company, with Riki looking on proudly with Kino and Nene. "They're a bunch of Nopon rangers that reside on the shoulder of Bionis.

"Nopongers, that is such a funny name," said a very amused Shulk, who couldn't help but smile at the name. "Do they have a Megazord or something?"

"Nopons need no giant fighting robot," stated Riki, whacking Shulk in the head with his Monopan. "Nopons already strong as they are!"

"Ow! Easy Riki, it was just a joke..." Then out of nowhere, Nene would strike Shulk in the leg with her sword. "Ouch! You too?"

"Nopon race very strong!" Nene said to Shulk, who now expected Kino to attack him next. "Father Riki, strongest Nopon of all!"

"Ah, they wouldn't be true Nopons if they didn't speak in broken English..." smirked Dunban, as Riki whacked the Homs in the head with his Monopan. "...I was just making a statement."

"And you wouldn't truly be Dunban, if you didn't have such a sensitive side," Melia said to the Homs, who gave her the side-eye. Dunban didn't see that one coming.

Dunban: When did Melia learn to make jokes all of a sudden? She wasn't like this in the past, when she was salty with Fiora... *pauses* ...that's it! I'll just have to make Melia salty again. I can't make her angry over Shulk and Fiora's relationship again...I can just tell her that blondes have more fun, which alone makes her inferior to Fiora. That shouldn't cause too big of a rift, I hope...

"May we have a word with you, please?" a man asked Shulk and friends, who looked over and saw Bradford approaching them, with Mario. "Central Officer John Bradford, of XCOM...just wanted to speak with you all."

"Meh-meh..." said the reserved Kino, as he hid behind Nene who had her sword ready to go.

"Little brother very shy, not good with strangers," Nene explained to Shulk and company, as she kept Kino protected. Shulk nodded in acknowledgement.

"Uh...hi," Shulk waved to Bradford, before looking over at Mario who was secretly giving Bradford the side-eye. "...Mario, who is this Bradford guy?"

"Some man from the government brought-a here by Hunter's delusion," replied Mario, as Bradford frowned and gave the plumber a nudge. "I mean, he's an executive commander focused on hunting down-a aliens."

"I've suspected that the Smash Mansion has seen some form of alien activity," Bradford explained to Shulk and friends, with Shulk and Dunban assuming that the Shroobs infiltrated the mansion unseen. "Someone alleged that the superhero group Wonderful 101 are aliens..."

"They are not aliens, we can assure you that," Dunban said kindly to Bradford, whose eyes veered to the side at Riki. Something about the Nopon appeared very odd to the commander.

"What about those things, are they aliens?" Bradford pointed at Riki the Nopons, finding their appearances to be cutesy yet very deceptive. "What kind of species are they, and what planet are they from?"

"We all Nopon! Born and raised in Frontier Village," Riki said to Bradford; his broken English obviously didn't help with Bradford's suspicions. "Riki forty years old, with eleven kids!"

"I find that hard to believe..." Bradford had this to say about Riki's age and fatherhood, before leaning in close to Mario. "What planet is this...Frontier Village?"

"You act like I'm-a supposed to know..." Mario whispered back; Frontier Village was actually inside a large tree in a forest atop the titan of Bionis, for those of you who may be wondering.

"What about the humans, are they really aliens in human disguises?" Mario could say that Shulk and friends were Homs, but the plumber just wanted to play it safe.

"No...they're British. Or New Zealanders. But since they have-a great dental hygiene, you could-a say they're New Zealanders."

"We've already been over this many times," stated Shulk, overhearing Mario and Bradford's whispering. "We're not British or Zealanders, we're..." Shulk was immediately stopped when Fiora covered his mouth.

"You should speak with Pit, he's an angel who came in contact with the Wonderful 101," Fiora said to Bradford, wanting the commander to go away so she and her friends can enjoy their time together in peace.

"Very well then...we'll see if this angel can get us somewhere," responded Bradford, as he turned around and left the premises. "Mario, you know this mansion better than I do - show me where this angel is."

"Should be showing you out-a of town instead..." grumbled Mario, as he followed after Bradford. With Mario and Bradford gone, Fiora uncovered Shulk's mouth.

"Am I the only one tired of being called British, or New Zealander?" Shulk asked Dunban, Fiora, and Melia, who either remained quiet or shook their head no. "You guys are better at handling this than I am..."

Lucario and Lucina (with Claptrap) took Booker and Elizabeth to the safest room possible, which was the gaming room. There the aura Pokemon and swordsman (and Claptrap) hung around, to see how used Booker and Elizabeth were to their new surroundings.

"Is that a Japanese man, playing with a dog?" inquired Elizabeth, as she saw Ryu playing a game of darts with K.K. Slider. "How is it possible for him to be so...muscular?"

"Probably because he took a bunch of steroids," assumed Claptrap, before looking down at the floor and looking all depressed. "If only I had muscles like him..."

"You're a scrawny little robot, shut your mouth," Lucina said to Claptrap, not saying much to raise the robot's already low confidence levels. "Nobody wants to hear your pity party."

"Will you two be safe enough here, from those Founder guys?" Lucario asked Booker and Elizabeth, as he wanted to get a move on. "Ike, Claptrap and I can scour the mansion for any signs of danger."

"Elizabeth and I will be just fine," assured Booker, as he took a good look around at the residents in the gaming room. "This strange collection of folks will keep us both company."

"Good. We'll be back, so just stay tight,"" Lucina said to Booker and Elizabeth, as she, Lucario, and Claptrap left the gaming room. Booker would walk away, only to bump into Sonic seconds later.

"Hey buddy, watch where you're walking!" Sonic shouted at Booker, eating from his chili dog, before getting a good look at the private investigator. "Oh snap! Are you supposed to be Sherlock Holmes?"

"I am nothing like Sherlock Holmes," replied Booker, a hundred percent certain that he was in a fever dream. No way would he be speaking with a blue hedgehog. "I'm actually a private investigator."

"But wasn't Sherlock Holmes a private investigator too, since he did detective stuff? It's okay if you wanna hide your identity as Sherlock Holmes, I won't hold it against ya!"

"Sonic, can you come over to the teleportation room?" MegaMan .EXE called out to the hedgehog, from outside the gaming room. "We need you to power up the teleportation device, it's down again!"

"I'm on it!" Sonic quickly sped out of the gaming room, as he dropped his chili dog to the floor in the process. Booker picked up the chili dog, staring at it inquisitively before looking out the gaming room entrance and wondering how Sonic could run so fast.

"How can anyone eat something like this...?" questioned Booker as he stared at the chili dog...before thinking "screw it" and took a bite out of said chili dog. "Hmm, not as bad as I thought it would be." Elizabeth saw Booker in the act, her face full of disgust.

Booker: A talking blue hedgehog, wearing shoes, and a frankfurter dog covered with chili...this is unlike anything I've ever seen in Columbia. This is what living in the future must be like...

"Wow, Waluigi, nice shot!" complimented Donkey Kong, as he was playing pool against the lanky man with Shantae and her friends looking on. Waluigi struck a ball into a hole, and was celebrating as if he had already won. "You're on a roll."

"Thank those ladies, they've given me the boost that I need," replied Waluigi, as she smiled at the half-genies; they all giggled, except for Harmony who still felt judgmental towards Waluigi. "What would I do without them!"

"Those women are wearing some scanty clothing," Booker said to Elizabeth, as the two wandered to the pool table to watch Donkey Kong and Waluigi duel it out. "They must be hookers..."

"Booker, don't be so disrespectful!" Elizabeth scolded the private investigator, slapping him on his arm. The slap accrued the attention of Donkey Kong, who was about to hit the cue ball.

"Ooh, we have visitors!" the gorilla gleamed, unnerving Booker just for being an animal capable of speaking. Elizabeth surprisingly didn't mind one bit. "Either one of you wanna play pool with us?"

"You should challenge that man to a pool match, Waluigi," Shantae said to the lanky man, looking at Booker; Booker wanted nothing to do with Waluigi, so he would turn down any offer that was presented to him.

"Good idea, Shantae!" said Waluigi, putting his pool stick down as he confronted Booker. The lanky man was trying to look tough in front of Booker, who wasn't buying the tough guy facade. "I challenge you, good sir, to a game of pool!"

"I object," said Booker; Waluigi apparently didn't expect this, as he gasped and clutched his pearls. "Find yourself another man to play with...I won't bother."

"You should at least play one game, Booker," said Elizabeth, as Booker seethed at the young woman with very heavy scorn.

"Your girlfriend is right!" Waluigi told Booker, his response offending the private investigator and Eliazabeth greatly. "I need to win against you, to look good in front of my lady friends and prove that I'm not a complete loser."

"I beg your pardon...you said that you 'need' to win against me?" questioned Booker, after Waluigi stoked a competitive fire inside of him. "I'll have to prove you wrong then..."

"Yeah, that's what I like to hear! You're on, mister - go get your pool stick, so I can cream you!"

"Elizabeth...get me a pool stick," Booker commanded the young woman, without even looking at her. That's how serious he was. "Someone here needs to be put in their place..."

"As you wish, Booker," Elizabeth nodded her head, before going to retrieve a pool stick for Booker. Waluigi may or may not have any idea what he was in for...

Ike was up in the cafe, making himself some coffee. As the swordsman was about to head out of the cafe, he suddenly ran into a pair of twins...the Lutece Twins, who came from Columbia via the teleportation device just like Booker and Elizabeth. They were obstructing Ike's path, with the male twin holding a blackboard with tally marks and the female twin holding a plate with cream and sugar.

"Well, uh...this is awkward," Ike chuckled nervously, not in the mood for introductions. He had to drink his coffee, before it grew cold. "Mind letting me through?"

"The question is simple..." said the female twin, Rosalind, as she held up her plate for Ike to see. "Cream..."

"...or sugar?" asked the male twin, Robert, eagerly waiting to tally down Ike on his blackboard in chalk.

"Cream..."

"...or sugar?"

"Um...yes?" answered Ike with a smile, knowing that his answer wouldn't fly with the Lutece Twins. "Look, both choices are fine..."

"You can't go wrong with cream," argued Rosalind, trying to sway Ike over to her side.

"The smart one is on sugar," argued Robert, trying to sway Ike over to his side.

"If I answer this question straight-up...will you please let me go?" asked Ike, who really had some stuff to take care of. "Does my answer even matter that much?"

"No," replied Rosalind as she shook her head.

"Or does it?" questioned Robert, making Ike grit his teeth.

"Hmm...good point."

"I know."

"No, you don't."

"I mean, I will know..."

"No, you had to have known..."

"I...have to have had known that I haven't..."

"Look, I'll make this quick," Ike said to the Lutece Twins, taking the chalk out of Robert's hand and writing a tally under where it said "Cream" before handing said chalk back. "I'll just go with cream! Happy now?"

Robert: Hmph, I was hoping he would go with sugar...
Rosalind: If you're going to be a sore loser, then I shant do this again.
Robert: Now that's just sophistry.

After Ike left, the Lutece lingered at the cafe entrance. Coming to the cafe was Samus, who was taking a break from working hard in the workshop.

"We both have a question for you," Rosalind said to Samus, as the bounty hunter reached the cafe. "Cream..."

"Shut up," responded Samus, knocking the plate with cream and sugar out of Rosalind's hands as she entered the cafe. As the Lutece Twins desperately tried to clean up their mess, Samus went to a coffee machine, to fix herself some coffee.

"Those dumb twins tried to bother ya?" Ganondorf asked Samus, chilling in the back of the cafe while sipping some coffee of his own. "Don't know where they came from, but they sure creeped me out..."

"All twins creep me out, to be honest." Even including Morgan and Marc, Samus? "Robin's stupid kids included." As Samus finished fixing her coffee, she heard someone outside, climbing up the wall of the mansion. "You hear that, Ganondorf?"

"Hear what?" Then out of nowhere, the window in the cafe opened up, and Face McShooty crawled his way inside. Samus screamed and jumped back, as McShooty approached her.

"You know what I want, now give it to me! GIMMIE GIMMIE GIMMIE GIMMIE!" McShooty shouted at Samus, beckoning to the bounty hunter with both hands. "SHOOT ME IN THE FACE, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!"

"He wants you to shoot him in the face?" Ganondorf stood up from his seat, wondering what the heck was wrong with McShooty. "If that isn't the most masochistic thing I've ever heard..."

"This creep has been following me around constantly," explained Samus, at edge as she kept her distance from McShooty. "He really wants me to shoot him in the face, for whatever reason..."

"Yes, in the face! It's not so complex!" exclaimed McShooty, the thought of getting shot at apparently making him giddy. "Face shot! Brains everywhere! Not the knee, not the arm, not the spine...FACE!"

"Let me take care of him..." said Ganondorf, walking closer to McShooty as he took out his Sword of Sages. The demon lord stabbed his sword through McShooty's chest, and McShooty...did nothing to react.

"Are you people DEAF or something?! I want you to shoot me IN THE FACE! Knock knock! Who's there? SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE!"

"This man is invincible..." Ganondorf took his sword out of McShooty's chest, looking in disbelief as he took a few steps back. "...you're on your own on this one."

"Some help you are..." grumbled Samus, no longer worried about her coffee as she left the cafe just to get as far away from McShooty as possible.

"SHOOT ME IN THE FACE!" McShooty shouted at Samus, breezing past the Lutece Twins as he chased Samus out of the cafe. "Maybe you're the weighing the moral pros and cons but let me assure you that OH COME ON SHOOT ME IN THE FACE ALREADY!"

Booker was doing surprisingly well at pool, as he was beating Waluigi at his own game. Several residents were gathered around Booker, watching the private investigator do his thing.

"Look at that, Waluigi is losing," said Ken Amada, with Waluigi looking on in shambles as Booker got two cue balls into holes in the same stroke. "What else is new?"

"Your boyfriend has a nice shot," Bowser said to Elizabeth, who let out a deep sigh. Again with people thinking that Booker and Elizabeth were a couple...

"He is not my boyfriend..." stated Elizabeth, although Bowser didn't want to believe her. He certainly wasn't the first one...

"Sure, keep on living in denial..." Bowser took a sip from his soda and left, hoping that Elizabeth would eventually come around.

Waluigi: It's clear as day that Booker cheated...he had his lady friend put magnets underneath the pool table, to make the balls roll easier. Not like I'm mediocre at pool or anything - it was just one of those rare moments of hubris.

"You're pretty good at pool, mister!" one of Shantae's half-genie friends, Zapple, said to Booker, who got another cue ball in a hole.

"I must say, I'm surprised myself at how well I'm doing," responded Booker, before looking up...and his eyes widened as he saw Comstock through the gaming room entrance, walking through the hallway with Cortex, Brio, Pit, and Handsome Jack.

"What's with that face, buddy?" Donkey Kong asked Booker, who was just standing there all shook. "You look like you forgot to turn off your oven." Booker quickly put his pool stick on the pool table, before running to Elizabeth.

"He's here..." the private investigator whispered to the young woman, before grabbing her hand and taking her into the farthest corner of the gaming room. Donkey Kong and the other spectators looked confused, although Waluigi couldn't complain...

"HE FORFEITED!" the lanky man cheered, as he pumped his fists in the air. "Which means...that I won! The Wah-Man reigns supreme!"

Cortex was strolling through the hallway with a bunch of cools guys, in Uka, Brio, Handsome Jack, Comstock...and Pit. The evil genius and his posse eventually ran into Mario and Bradford.

"Mario! Have you met my new friends?" Cortex asked the plumber, irking Handsome Jack and Comstock just a little. "Mario, this is Handsome Jack and Zachary Hale Comstock; Handsome Jack and Zachary Hale Comstock, this is Mario."

"Never knew it was possible for a man to be so short..." remarked Comstock after he sized up Mario; evidently he never saw a midget in person before.

"He looks like a complete dork," Handsome Jack snickered quietly to Comstock, nudging the old man in his side. "Wouldn't last five seconds on Pandora!"

"Is that the angel who came in contact with the Wonderful 101?" Bradford quietly asked Mario as he kept a very close eye on Pit, who was digging into his ear with his finger.

"He is the one..." replied Mario before directing his attention to Pit, who was just about to lick the earwax on his index finger. "...Pit, can you come-a with us? We need you for some-a thing."

"May I have your permission to leave with Mario, Dr. Cortex?" Pit asked the evil genius, with pleading hands. Cortex, mulling things over, figured that he wouldn't need Pit as much today.

"Go ahead, take your time..." replied Cortex, as Pit smiled and happily joined Mario and Bradford. Handsome Jack, Comstock, and even Uka all let out sighs of relief.

"Mario and I are running an alien investigation," Bradford explained to Cortex and company, as if any of them actually cared. "This angel just might give us the breakthrough we need."

"Wait, before you go..." Comstock said to Mario and Bradford, before looking down at Cortex and putting his hand on his shoulder. "...Cortex, it's about time you display your authority. Use the power invested in you to make Mario bow down to your command."

"Right!" nodded Cortex, before focusing his attention on Mario. Mario understandably was puzzled, and he was even more puzzled as he saw Cortex hold out his hand, and clench it real tight.

"Are you using the Force?" Mario questioned Cortex, unsure of what the evil genius was attempting to do. "First-a Corrin, and now you..."

"Mario, I command you...to bow down to me, and kiss my feet!" Cortex tightened his fist, and clenched his teeth, but all that made it look like he was in pain.

"Want me to kiss-a your feet bare-a foot, or kiss it as it is now? I'd much rather go with-a the latter."

"...he's still a work in progress," Handsome Jack said to Comstock, who agreed wholeheartedly as he grabbed Cortex and pulled him away.

"Let's go, Cortex...hopefully you can redeem yourself next time," Comstock said to the evil genius, sounding defeated as the group turned around and walked away.

"What you mean, redeem myself?" Cortex whined, trying to pull Comstock's hand off of him. "Was that not a great attempt?!"

Shulk and friends were inside the mansion now, with Kino, Rene, and the Nopongers. They were in the dining room, with Cilan providing some lunch.

"Who wants some malasadas?" asked Cilan, placing a plate of malasadas where the Nopongers were seated. The Nopongers ate all the malasadas up. "Wow, you sure are a hungry bunch!"

"Good food always great for Nopons," Riki said to Cilan, watching proudly as the Nopongers gobbled up the malasadas. "Make Nopons healthy and strong!"

"Malasadas aren't exactly healthy food, though," stated Dunban, as Riki whacked the Homs on his head again with his Monopan. "Okay, now that one hurt..."

"Would you like one, Kino?" Melia asked the young Nopon, holding out a malasada to him. Kino looked hesitant at first...but he took the malasada and gobbled it down anyways.

"So delicious!" the Nopon gleamed, as Melia smiled; Kino was very slowly coming out from his shell.

"Sorry if we're bothering you all," Cloud apologized to Shulk and friends, as he and Link entered the dining room still searching for the Pandora rogues. "Have either one of you seen any visitors, in the mansion?"

"Visitors such as...?" asked Shulk, as he continued eating. Dunban would participate in the conversation, but was too timid now to speak.

"Just a group of people who look like they can kick your butt," replied Link, not ringing a bell with Shulk and company. "And maybe a teenager girl who appears older than she looks and might be destructive."

"Come to think of it...we did see a girl earlier, she was crafting some kind of bomb. She was crazy, in an oddly threatening way..."

"Any idea where we can find her?" asked Cloud, wanting to find the Pandora rogues soon before they hurt someone.

"Got no clue - we last saw her outside. But we did see her."

"Thanks for the info." Cloud and Link would leave the dining room, as they continued their search. "We'll have to keep looking..."

Everyone at Star Records was in high spirits, after Master Hand's Lamborghini was sold. No longer would the record label have to worry Master hand stealing their hard-earned money, to finance a luxury car he couldn't even drive. Fox and Falco were especially happy, standing in front of an elevator as they were about to head up to the Star Records room.

"That car salesman sure came through with the funds," Fox said to Falco, discussing the car salesman who offered to repay Star Records all the money they lost thanks to Master Hand. 'It was like getting a dozen stimulus checks!"

"Tell me about it - didn't know he was such a big money grip," replied Falco, as he waited for the elevator. "Unless he took money out of his worker's paychecks, which I wouldn't blame him for." The elevator dinged, and the elevator door opened...

...and inside the elevator was a young black woman, dressed up as if she was from the early 1900's, holding Ken Masters against the elevator wall. Fox and Falco just stood there and watched.

"What the...Ken, who's your new friend?" Fox asked the fighter, whose hands were being held his back by the young woman. Not much he could do to fight back.

"She's not my friend...she's some random chick targeting me just because I'm white!" replied Ken; he would hit a girl, but maybe not in moments like these "Daisy Fitzroy!"

"Daisy Fitzroy?" uttered Falco, before looking at the black woman in question. "Bruh, lay off the guy, he's like a quarter white!"

"Told her that multiple times already..." Eventually Fitzroy would let go of Ken, letting the fighter fall to the elevator floor, before she looked at Fox and Falco.

"Why you care so much about this man?" the woman questioned the pilots, speaking with the kind of conviction that Comstock spoke of. "This man deserves none of your pity!"

"Yeah, but he doesn't deserve to get wrangled with," said Fox, before looking at the downed Ken who was pulling himself across the elevator floor. "Ken, why did you let this chick harass you?"

"All I did was answer a question..." replied Ken, able to pull himself out of the elevator. "...she asked me if I saw an old white man with a beard, and I said yes! That's when she attacked me. Can't even answer questions anymore!"

"That old white man is Zachary Hale Comstock, leader of the Founders," Fitzroy explained to Fox and Falco, bringing the pilots up to speed. "Them Founders want to make Columbia in their image, the way they see things fit!"

"...and you care about this because?" asked Fox, finding Fitzoy to be too committed for her own good.

"Comstock is the god of the white man, the rich man, the pitiless man. But if you believe in common folk, and the righteous folk, you join the Vox Populi. Together, we can bring Comstock down!"

"You're thinking about this way too much. Also...this is the Smash Mansion, not Columbia."

"I know where I am - I was brought here against my will, thanks to that machine. But if I can kill Comstock before I return, Columbia will be in a much better place! And there's not a thing anyone can do to stop me!"

On that note, the elevator door closed, with Fitzroy having a menacing look her face. Fitzroy was clearly out for blood, looking to take out Comstock to ensure a better outlook for Columbia.

"Dang it...we missed our stop!" Falco snapped his fingers in disgust, as Ken slowly stood up on his feet. "Our fault for standing around like doofuses."

Ken: First time I was ruthlessly attacked, just for being partially white...there's a first for everything, I suppose.

"Fox and Falco!" Link called out to the pilots, as he and Cloud caught up to them in the hallway. "Cloud and I are looking for a few visitors. Seen any foreign faces today?"

"Funny you should mention that, we ran into a visitor ourselves," replied Fox, who now had regrets over letting Fitzroy getting away. "So who are you looking for?"

The visitors that Link and Cloud were looking for were Lilith, Brick, Mordecai, and Tina, all of whom were committed to finding Handsome Jack and taking him out. The four were chilling out in the lounge, going over their game plan.

"Just so you know, I've invited Sir Reginald to our tea party," Tina informed the others, who were more focused on putting their plan together. "I have also invited Princess Fluffybutt, who has gazongas like you would not be-lieeeeve..."

"This isn't a tea party," Lilith reminded Tina, often serving as the voice of reason among her comrades. "This is an important meeting, to discuss you-know-who."

"Handsome Jack? I'd say we sneak-attack him!" suggested Brick, slamming his fist on the table in front of him because it was obligatory. "Slither right up behind him, like a snake, and then cover his eyes and BOOM...instant kill."

"We can't do that, it's too cowardly of a move," said Mordecai, coming off as a buzzkill with Brick glaring him down. "It'll be better if Jack sees it coming."

"Mayhaps it would be even better if...SHUT UP MORDY!" Tina shouted at Mordecai, getting droplets of saliva in the marksman's face.

"Tina!" Lilith scolded the teenager, before directing her attention to Mordecai. "She's right though, shut up."

"Yeah, why would a marksman like you be against a sneak attack?" Brick asked Mordecai, finding the marksman's comments to be ironic. "That's like a businessman hating on suits! You're all backwards, son!"

"I'd say we blow up Handsome Jack with bombs!" exclaimed Tina, taking out a few bombs she was working on in secret. "Bombs voyage!"

"You know, I was against using bombs..." said Lilith, looking at the bombs Tina crafted while she thought to herself. "...but they're our best bet. We can destroy Handsome Jack, without destroying much of this building itself."

"Still think we should sneak-attack Handsome Jack, but we can go with a few bombs," said Brick, before gasping when the perfect idea crossed his mind. "We can sneak-attack Handsome Jack with bombs!"

"Either way, Jack's going down no matter what. So, Tina...see if you can make us a few more bombs."

So Tina immediately went to work, crafting more bombs to blow up Handsome Jack with. Samus walked by the lounge and peeked inside, seeing the Vault Hunters before shaking her head.

"Our security system must be slacking today..." remarked Samus as she kept on walking, only to run into...you guessed it, Face McShooty. "...not again."

"You know what time it is?" McShooty asked Samus, before pointing as his...well, you know. "FACE SHOOTING O'CLOCK! SHOOT ME IN THE FACE!"

"I've got no time for this..." Samus walked past McShooty, and McShooty, as was tradition, followed after Samus.

"I'm gonna sing a song, shoot me at the end of it! DA DA DA DA DA DA...BONG!"

Feeling that the coast was clear, Booker hightailed out of the gaming room with Elizabeth. He would head back to Columbia, but he couldn't bank on the teleportation device being up and running.

"Call the elevator!" Booker said to Elizabeth, seeing an elevator a few feet away. Had to get as far away from Comstock as possible, even if it meant reaching the highest point of the mansion.

"What?" asked Elizabeth, who was busy looking around for another escape route. "You said...call the elevator?"

"PRESS THE BUTTON!" Elizabeth still didn't understand, as Booker sighed. "Guess we can take the stairs..."

Booker and Elizabeth ran down the hallway, looking for the nearest staircase they could find. They found a staircase eventually, not far from where they were.

"Let's hurry," Booker said to Elizabeth, as he ran down the stairs. Elizabeth was about to follow after Booker, before a half-open door poked at her curiosity. The young woman took a peek through the doorway, and saw Mario and Bradford in a darkened room.

"I'm going to run a lie detector test on you," Bradford explained to Pit, who was sitting in a chair with wires from a lie detector attached to his body. "I'll ask you a few yes or no questions, and you'll answer them truthfully. Understood?"

"Yup!" nodded Pit, causing the lie detector to explode. "Totally meant to do that." The lie detector would explode a second time. "I think your lie detector's broken."

Bradford: I had to bring out the lie detector since the angel wasn't providing reliable answers. Couldn't stop talking about how the American school system "lied" to their students about the colors of the rainbow. Don't know what that has to do with aliens...

"You coming?" Booker approached Elizabeth, coming from the staircase and wondering why Elizabeth was staying behind.

"We can stay here," Elizabeth told Booker, as she pointed inside the room. "These men can keep us company, till we make our next move."

"Okay, but no sudden movements..." So Booker and Elizabeth entered the room, sneaking to the back while Mario and Bradford looked at the busted lie detector.

"Sorry buddy - that lie detector looks-a toast," Mario said to Bradford, as Pit saw Booker and Elizabeth infiltrate the room trying to be unseen.

"Mario, there's a random couple in this room..." Pit informed the plumber, causing the lie detector explode a third time. "I didn't mean to do that one!" Lie detector didn't explode that time...

Lucario, Ike, and Claptrap returned to the gaming room, to see how Booker and Elizabeth were handling things. But little did they now...

"When did Booker and Elizabeth leave?" Lucario asked Donkey Kong, who was about to play a game of pool with Diddy Kong. "Where did they run off to?"

"It was a while ago; they never said why they left," replied Donkey Kong, getting Lucario all sorts of worried. "Just ran outta here like it was nothing!"

"As long as they're safe, we should be just fine," remarked Ike, looking stern as ever as he folded his arms. "They couldn't have gone too far..."

The Vault Hunters moved out of the lounge, ready to make their move on Handsome Jack. There was only one problem standing in their way...

"Have either one of you seen Tina anywhere?" Lilith asked Mordecai and Brick, as she looked around for the destructive teenager in the hallway. "She would run off..."

"Guys, guys, look what I found!" exclaimed a rather excitable Tina, running up to the Vault Hunters with Jigglypuff in her grasp. "It's a TALKING PINK BALLOON!"

"Jiggly Jigglypuff!" Jigglypuff smiled at the Vault Hunters, with Lilith and Mordecai not impressed. Brick, on the other hand, was allured by the balloon Pokemon.

"Aw, it's so cute and adorable..." the big man smiled, with the others judging him as they gave him weird looks. Brick toughened up real quick. "...uh, you know."

"Hey guys, check it out..." Mordecai said to the others, as he turned around and looked down the hallway. "...I see Handsome Jack!"

At the end of the hall, at the hallway intersection, was Handsome Jack. The businessman, who was walking with Cortex, Brio, and Comstock, came across Waluigi and his half-genie pals.

"Say hello to my gal pals, Cortex!" Waluigi said to the evil genius, as the half-genies smiled and waved at Cortex and his posse. "Too bad you don't have any lady friends to call your own."

"I do have lady friends, it's just...I've yet to meet them in person," Cortex replied the best way he could, as Handsome Jack and Comstock sized up Waluigi.

"That lanky dude looks easy to take down," Handsome Jack whispered into Cortex's ear, seeing Waluigi as easy pickings. "Should have no problem with him."

"Show that man what you're truly made of," Comstock advised Cortex, as he put his hand on the evil genius' shoulder. "Exert your power and dominance over him, and make him submit!"

"You fellas talking junk about me?" questioned Waluigi, before Cortex stepped forward towards the lanky man and held out his hand.

"Waluigi, I command you to bow down before me!" Cortex commanded of the lanky man, as the half-genies look on, amused. "Get down on your knees, and pay your respects...or else!"

"Is he about to go on a random villain monologue?" inquired Shantae, as Waluigi was visibly unaffected by Cortex's lame attempt to force him into submission. Handsome Jack knew something had to be done.

"Threaten to kill him! Use violent imagery!" Handsome Jack whispered to Cortex, who took out his ray gun and pointed it at Waluigi.

"Either you bow down to me, or I'll..blast you to bits of flesh with my ray gun!" Cortex barked at Waluigi, as both Handsome Jack and Comstock facepalmed.

"This guy is super funny when he tries to be threatening!" Waluigi smiled at the half-genies, as he pointed at Cortex. The half-genies were laughing, which obviously made Cortex feel some type of way.

"You have so much to learn, Dr. Cortex..." Comstock said to the evil genius, who just stood there in place as Waluigi and the half-genies passed by. Handsome Jack saw the half-genies walk past him, and smiled.

"Ladies..." the businessman clicked his fingers at the half-genies, who giggled as they followed after Waluigi. "...works every time."

Handsome Jack: Yup...still got it. Now you know the reason why they call me Handsome Jack. Well, one of the reasons.

"Wow...that was a sorry attempt," remarked Mordecai, as he and the others watched Handsome Jack walk down the hallway with the rest of Cortex's posse. "Uh, what were supposed to do again?"

"Kill Handsome Jack, you moron," replied Lilith, who sighed deeply as she shook her head. "Can't believe we just let him get away like that..."

"NOT A SINGLE MOVE!" someone commanded the Vault Hunters, who turned around and saw Fox and Falco with their Blasters pointed at them. "Just stay right where you are..."

"So you're the unwanted guests we're looking for, huh?" Falco asked the Vault Hunters, who were not one bit intimidated. It wasn't their first rodeo being held at gunpoint, and it wouldn't be their last.

"I...I guess?" replied Lilith as she eyed around the hallway. "It's not like we're out killing people...although we do have someone in mind."

"Ha, so you admit to having a bloodlust to kill! Just as we suspected!" Link and Cloud must've told the pilots how dangerous the Vault Hunters could be.

"We used Jigglypuff there as a bait, in the hopes of finding you punks," Fox explained to the Vault Hunters, as Tina looked down at Jigglypuff. "That girl grabbed Jigglypuff, and led us right to you!"

"Yeah, and so what if you found us?" questioned Brick, who was prepared to punch Fox and Falco with both of his fists. "Whatcha gonna do, throw us down in some basement?!"

...that's exactly what Fox and Falco did, as they threw the Vault Hunters down in the mansion's basement. The Vault Hunters fought back, but the pilots got the better of them.

"Jigglypuff Jigglypuff!" Jigglypuff taunted the Vault Hunters, before slamming the basement door on them. Mordecai took out a torch and lit it, illuminating the darkness of the basement.

"They actually threw us in the basement..." remarked Brick, who didn't think that Fox and Falco were capable of pulling off the act. "...I might've spoken it into existence by accident. My bad."

"It's really not your fault," nodded Mordecai, before looking at Tina - the teenager responsible for the Vault Hunters being trapped in the basement. "Tina, what do you have to say for yourself?"

"NAP TIME!" squealed Tina, as she leaped unto a mattress sitting on the basement floor. Cockroaches a many ran out from the mattress, as Brick shrieked and jumped back out of fright.

"...y'all didn't see anything," the big guy said to Lilith and Mordecai, doing his best to preserve his manliness.

Shulk and friends were back outside, this time hanging around the lakeside. They were with the Nopongers, who were swimming in the mansion's lake.

"I never knew that Nopons were capable of swimming," remarked Shulk, watching as the Nopongers were just...floating on the water surface. Not exactly swimming. "Guess that means they aren't aquaphobic!"

"Riki teach kids how to swim," stated Riki, as he watched over his youngins Kino and Nene. "Very fast learners. Make Riki proud."

"Can brother and me swim in water?" Nene asked Riki, desiring to splash around in the water. Kino, the timid one, felt the exact opposite.

"Of course! But be safe, little ones. No drowning!" So Nene ran to the lake surface, bringing Kino along with her. But Kino wouldn't budge.

"Meh-meh..." the young Nopon said, acting like the lake was a dangerous sea of lava. "...no swim in water. Kino want to stay put."

"No timidness! Be brave, little bro." Nene would take Kino's hand, and guide him gently to the lake until she and her brother were in the water. A couple of seconds passed, and Kino quickly got over his fears.

"Riki knew you could do it!" Riki said to Kino and Rene, who were now splashing around happily in the water. "Proud Riki! Very proud!"

"You sure have a very wholesome family," Fiora said to Riki, who had a proud fatherly look on his face as Samus showed up. "Oh, hi Samus."

"Hey," Samus responded flatly, walking over to the lakeside and stretching her arms and legs. "Don't mind me...just needed to get out of the mansion. Some weirdo is chasing me around..."

"King Dedede hasn't gone back to flirting with you, has he?" chuckled Shulk, as Samus gave the Homs a vicious stare. Shulk would continue chuckling, unitl there was some mysterious bubbling on the lake's surface.

"Uh oh...looks like we have some company," fretted Melia, as the Nopons in the lake suddenly noticed the suspicious bubbling and retreated.

"Meh-meh..." said Kino, now back on land with Nene as he hid behind his big sister. Everyone was on edge, as a head emerged from the lake...and it was Face McShooty's head.

"How does he keep finding me...?!" wondered Samus, as McShooty stood up in the lake with the water up to his waist.

"I am once again asking for your non-financial support..." the menace said to Samus as he walked out of the lake...before dropping the nice facade quickly. "...JUST SHOOT ME IN THE FACE!"

"He wants you to shoot him in the face?" Dunban asked Samus, who should probably call the police or something. "Isn't that...assisted suicide?"

"Apparently he wants me of all people to do it..." replied Samus, backing away as McShooty crept closer to the bounty hunter. "...he's obviously insane."

"Evil man leave Samus alone!" shouted Riki, wanting to take initiative standing of just standing around. "Nopongers, ATTACK!" Right on cue, the Nopongers ambushed McShooty, ganging up on the man and attacking him with their weapons.

"Thanks, Riki...time to make my escape," Samus said to the Nopon, as she ran away from the premises and back to the mansion. The Nopongers continued their attack on McShooty, showing no mercy whatsoever.

"Nopongers, stop!" commanded Riki, as the Nopongers ceased and backed away from McShooty. One would expect McShooty to be battered and bruised from the beatdown...but the man stood up, without a single scratch.

"Tired of waiting, no more waiting!" exclaimed McShooty, moving around frantically in front of Shulk and company. "Need a face-shot, BOOM!"

"Well neither one of us has a gun, so..." said Shulk, as McShooty grunted and went back to the mansion, going back to hunting down Samus. "...good riddance."

Shulk: *shakes his head* ...we are so laid-back, with what we allow in the mansion.

Riki: Nopongers do great job, beating up evildoer. But evildoer not afflicted. So Nopongers failed!

The Vault Hunters were still stuck in the basement, looking for a way out. Mordecai tried to open the basement door, but it was no use.

"Crap, they locked us from the outside," the marksman frowned, his latest attempt to open the door an utter failure. "We're truly stuck here."

"Not so fast...I know a guy who can get us out," said Lilith, as she and Mordecai looked up at Brick. Brick was just scratching his armpit, when he saw his fellow Vault Hunters looking at him.

"Don't know why y'all are looking at me..." the big guy said, as Lilith and Mordecai continued to stare at him. Enough to make him sigh. "...lemme take a crack at it." Brick would walk up to the door, and punch it with all his might...and the door didn't budge.

"What's the point, we might as well rot here forever..." Mordecai threw his arms up in defeat, as he and the others walked down the stairs back to the basement floor. "...or we can wake Tina up from her nap, and let her bust us out."

"Nah, I'd rather just wait it out," said Lilith, watching as Tina was peacefully napping away on the cockroach-infested mattress. "Trying to wake Tina up is like poking a lion in his..."

Lilith would be interrupted by some yelling and bickering, that came from behind the basement door. The Vault Hunters looked up, and saw the basement door busted wide open. Standing at the doorway was Daisy Fitzroy, who was holding Wario in his arm...must've used the fatso's waft to open the door.

"Now I know she did not just use someone's explosive fart to bust that door open..." frowned Brick, as the smell of Wario's flatulence soon reached his nostrils. "...I gotta admit, that's pretty cool! But also disgusting."

"Put me down, woman, let me go!" Wario shouted at Fitzroy, with his butt turned towards the Vault Hunter. Fitzoy would grant the fatso's wish, tossing him down the basement stairs.

"I'm Daisy Fitzroy, leader of the Vox Populi," Fitzroy introduced herself, walking down the stairs and looking all intimidating. "I've heard some murmurings that a bunch of 'troublemakers' were down in this basement...and those murmurings seem to be true."

"What is it that you want?" Lilith questioned Fitzroy, who was now standing in front of the Vault Hunters as she put her foot on a downed Wario. "You here to bust us out, or what?"

"I can...but only for a fee. I've been looking for a group of miscreants, to aid me in taking down Comstock...and you seem like the perfect bunch."

"Who are you calling miscreants?!" frowned Mordecai, as he shook his fist angrily at Fitzroy. "Take that back, woman!"

"Woah there Mordy, ease up!" Brick said to the marksman, holding him back from Fitzroy. "So, what is it that you want, woman?"

"All I want is to eliminate Comstock, for the sake of Columbia. If he goes down, them Founders go down along with him."

"Comstock sure sounds like an old guy name...that old guy with the beard hanging out with Handsome Jack and those two shorties could be Comstock!"

"Yes, that is him...Father Comstock. He must've brought here from Columbia, and I will make sure he doesn't make it back alive!"

"The man he's with, Handsome Jack...we kinda have our eyes on him," Lilith explained to Fitzroy, reaching some kind of common ground with the young woman. "We could work together to take out both of our targets!"

"I am fine with that...just as long as Comstock is taken care of. For now, I'll consider you all temporary members of the Vox..."

"What's going on, what's this I hear about some Vox?" mumbled Wario, his face pinned against the floor. He could barely move, with Fitzroy standing on his back.

Wario: That woman really used my fart as a weapon, without even asking for my consent...I feel violated.

"Tina's awake!" announced Tina as she woke up from her nap, and yawned. After the teen was done yawning, she saw Fitzroy. "Ooh, who's the pretty lady?"

"Just some chick that's gonna help us take out Handsome Jack," replied Mordecai, as Tina gleamed and happily clapped her hands. "And that old guy we saw Jack hanging around with."

"Yippee! We're back in business, baby!" Tina dug into her pockets, and pulled out what appeared to be miniature bombs.

"Tina, are those miniature bombs?" Lilith asked the teenager, who was holding black pea-sized bombs in her hand. "You...made those?"

"Yes, my sweet Lily of the Valley! I figured my regular bombs would be confiscated, so I made these sweet little babies in secret. And now, we can break our way outta this dump!"

"At least we didn't have to wake you up..." mumbled Mordecai, as Tina turned around and saw the basement door that led to the outside. She threw the mini bombs at the door, which attached to the door quickly.

"Counting down! Ten! Nine!"

Shulk and company were still at the lakeside, minding their business, when they were caught off-guard by an explosion that came from the basement door. The basement door exploded, as Daisy proudly walked out of the basement with the Vault Hunters.

"...I got bored," said Tina, who couldn't bother counting down to one. A crazy girl like her had no time for patience.

"Aw come on, Dunban and I just painted that basement door!" Shulk frowned at Fitzroy and company, not questioning who they were and where they came from. The explosion drew the attention of Tom Nook and Isabelle, who came over to investigate.

"What was with that explosion?" wondered Tom Nook, before he and Isabelle saw Fitzroy and the Vault Hunters standing defiantly. "We have intruders?!"

"Not just any intruders - the best intruders around!" exclaimed Brick in a bragging manner, as Lilith and Brick. "What's so wrong with that?"

"You made the basement door explode!" Tom Nook saw the damage done to the basement door, and gasped. "Why would you do such a thing?!"

"'Cause we run the joint, sucka!" replied Tina, as she showed the tanoki a few of the mini bombs she made. "And it was all thanks to that chick with the blonde ponytail that I made these..."

"Did you just say 'chick with the blonde ponytail'?" inquired Isabelle, before gasping when she realized which resident matched the description. "You're not talking about Samus, are you?"

"Yeah, that's her - the chick who gave me the scrap parts to craft my bombs! She's got a body like dynamite and a booty like poooooow..."

"Come on everyone, let's go..." Daisy said to the Vault Hunters, as she led them away from the premises. "...we should try to lure Comstock and Handsome Jack out of the mansion. I have just the plan..."

"Should we...should we call the police?" Isabelle asked Tom Nook, knowing that she and the tanoki were no match for Fitzroy and her crew.

"No, we've bothered them enough times already," replied Tom Nook; the mansion must already have Seattle's police department on speed dial. Tom Nook walked away, with Isabelle following after him. "You call Mario, and give him the 4-1-1...while I have a word with one of our candidates."

Shulk and company remained where they were, with Tom Nook and Isabelle going one way, and Fitzroy and her gang going the other way. Obviously, something needed to be done.

"How about we let the Nopongers save the day?" Shulk suggested to the others, before looking down at Riki. "What do you say, Riki?"

"Good idea, Shulk - Riki approve!" Riki nodded his head, before focusing his attention on the Nopongers. "Nopongers ready to go, yes?"

"Nene and Kino like to help, too!" exclaimed Nene, who was down for any cause. Always had a fighting attitude.

"Meh-meh!" exclaimed Kino, who for the first time today was showing some signs of confidence.

"Excellent!" smiled Shulk, before looking at the direction that Fitzroy and company headed. "No time to wait around..."

Bradford was still interrogating Pit in the room, with Mario listening on. Booker and Elizabeth were also still hiding in the room, with neither Mario nor Bradford knowing about their presence.

"...and then I asked Wonder-White about how he stays fit, and he was all like, 'Buddha: three pounds of flax'," Pit explained to Bradford, while imitating Wonder-White's voice. Bradford looked like he was done with life, staring into the distance with his hand on his temple.

"What does this even have to do with aliens..." pondered Bradford, pinching the crown of his nose. Mario's phone suddenly rang, and Mario picked it up.

"Hello?" the plumber answered the call, speaking into his cellphone. "Hi Isabelle. What's-a up?...What's that? A group-a of destructive visitors? And they're led by some black-a woman with dreads?"

"Daisy Fitzroy..." whispered Booker, knowing the woman that Isabelle was telling Mario about. Elizabeth knew as well, worried that Fitzroy might've followed her and Booker to the mansion.

"I'm with Pit right-a now, but I can come out-a side to reason with this group. Just give-a me a minute and I'll be..." Mario would soon be interrupted by Booker, who came out of nowhere and snatched the phone out of Mario's hand.

"...we'll be out there shortly," Booker spoke into the phone, before handing it back to Mario. Mario stood there, looking perplexed at Booker.

"...see ya," Mario spoke into the phone before ending the call, as Elizabeth joined Booker. "Who are-a you, and most importantly, what's-a your problem?"

"Look, that woman, Daisy Fitzroy...she's dangerous. She could do something potentially dangerous to this mansion!"

"Oh, you know-a her personally? From a scale-a from one to ten, how dangerous is she?"

"She's the leader of a militant revolutionary group," Elizabeth said to Mario, grabbing the plumber's attention. "So that should tell you all you need to know..."

"Mama mia..." Learning that Fitzroy wasn't the kind of woman to mess with, Mario was determined to put an end to her plot. "...Bradford, you stay here with-a Pit; I've got some-a business to handle."

"You're leaving me with this moronic angel?" Bradford yelled at Mario, who left the room with Booker and Elizabeth. "Is this what I get, for making you to participate in my...aaaand he's gone."

The Lutece twins were wandering around the mansion, asking random residents if they preferred cream or sugar. They were now in the kitchen, where Link and Cloud were hanging around with Fox and Falco.

"Ah, sugar, what a fine choice," smiled Robert, as Link wrote a tally under "Sugar" on the blackboard. "Fine choice indeed."

"Should've picked cream..." grumbled Rosalind, as she and Robert left the kitchen. Those two could never agree on anything.

Rosalind: I expected that tunic-wearing man to go with cream...
Robert: If you're going to be a sore loser, then I shant...oh, what's the point?

"Man, I'm so glad Falco and I nabbed those guys," Fox said to Link and Cloud, speaking of the Vault Hunters. "We should be the buddy cops around here! Forget Toon Link and Young Link!"

"Link, Cloud...we got a problem," Lucario informed the swordsmen, coming into the kitchen with Lucina and Claptrap. "Those visitors, in the basement...they got out."

"But how? We locked them out, from both basement doors," stated Cloud, as he and Link were looking for answers. "Unless they had explosives with them."

"Wario told us they used some kind of bomb to escape," explained Lucina; Link and Cloud should've seen that one coming. "Not only that, but now they're being led by some woman."

"Man, at this rate, those Vault Hunters will never return to Pandora..." sighed Claptrap, looking defeated as if thee was no hope. "...they're probably used to being on earth by now."

"Do you ever think positively, for a second?" If Lucina knew Claptrap better, she would know that the answer to her question...was no.

"Those jerks must be outside," assumed Falco, scratching his beak in thought. "We let them get too far from the mansion grounds, we're toast..."

Face McShooty was now on Samus' last nerve, desperately wanting to receive a face-shot. He was standing in Samus' way in the foyer, preventing Samus from possibly getting away.

"SHOOT ME IN THE FACE, DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING!" McShooty said to Samus, who let out a deep sigh as she watched McShooty move around erratically. "The moment is yours, so just take it!"

"If I shoot you...will you leave me alone?" asked Samus - best to resolve her ongoing problem, right here and now.

"Yes! Shoot me, and all will be forgiven. Just give me what I want!" So Samus, sighing again, took out her plasma gun and held it at McShooty. The bounty hunter fired a shot at McShooty...

...and in the act, the sound of gunfire was heard, causing McShooty to fall unto the floor as if he were dead. Samus still got him in the face, though.

"THANK YOU!" McShooty thanked Samus, believing he was now dead, as Samus wondered where the sound of gunfire came from. It came from Booker, who came downstairs to the foyer with Mario and Elizabeth.

"My apologies...my gun slipped," apologized Booker, as he and the others ran out of the mansion. Samus took a few steps back from McShooty's "dead" body, before turning around...and seeing Tom Nook staring at her.

"There you are, Miss Aran..." Tom Nook said to the bounty hunter, taking notice of McShooty's "dead" body lying on the floor. "...I see we have much to discuss."

Mario, Booker, and Elizabeth were outside, searching for Fitzroy and the Vault Hunters who were nowhere to be found.

"Where could that Fitzroy be?" asked Booker, searching around the front yard of the mansion. Elizabeth looked up at the mansion roof, and gasped.

"Booker, up there!" the young woman shouted, pointing up; Booker and Mario looked up, and saw Fitzroy atop the mansion roof, with the Vault Hunters.

"So that's-a Daisy Fitzroy..." remarked Mario as he looked at Fitzroy, who slowly held out a lit torch. "...why does she have-a that torch?"

"We meet again, Booker DeWitt...and Elizabeth," Fitzroy said to the private investigator and young woman. "...I'm afraid you're too late."

"Too late for what?" Booker questioned Fitzroy, as he kept himself calm. "What is your end goal, Fitzroy?"

"To eliminate Comstock, once and for all. I'll set this mansion ablaze to drive him out, at whatever cost!"

"Don't forget Handsome Jack, we want him out as well!" Tina reminded Fitzroy, who nodded her head.

"Yes, we'll drive out Handsome Jack too...kill two birds with one stone."

Bowser: *crinkles his nose* Hmm, don't know why, but I feel like kicking some random chick's butt today...might be trying to steal my thunder.

"Mario, who's that woman on the mansion roof?" Fox asked the plumber, arriving at the scene with Falco and the others from the kitchen.

"I bet it's the Daisy Fitzroy woman that fat guy warned us about," replied Claptrap, who saw all the Vault Hunters all aligned with Fitzroy. "There goes the Vault Hunters! That's definitely Fitzroy!"

"Uh...there's a good explanation for this, Claptrap," Mordecai called out to the robot, who was no doubt judging the actions of the Vault Hunters.

"Don't bother with the robot, he's not important now..." Fitzroy told Mordecai, wanting to focus on the task at hand. One person that couldn't focus on the task was Brick, who turned around out of curiosity...

...and saw a Nopon standing on the roof. Not just any Nopon - Kino, the reserved Nopon who was looking shy and reserved.

"Meh-meh..." Kino nervously greeted Brick, overwhelming the big guy with his cuteness. Brick couldn't help but smile.

"Aw, aren't you a cute little fella..." smiled Brick as he stepped closer to Kino...only for new Nopongers to show up. "...uh oh."

"You guys hear something?" Lilith asked Mordecai and Tina, who both shook their heads. Eventually, they saw Brick, getting ganged up by Kino and the Nopongers.

"Help, I'm being attacked by cuteness!" Brick cried for help, lying on the roof floor as he was being attacked. "I'm being sneak-attacked!" Soon more Nopongers showed up, as they wrangled with the other Vault Hunters.

"You mean we're being sneak-attacked..." said Mordecai, as he and his comrades were ambushed by the Nopongers. "...I blame you for this, Brick."

"They really let their guard down..." Fitzroy shook her head at the Vault Hunters, who were now dealing with the Nopongers, before turning around to face Booker and company down below while holding her torch. "...no matter, this mansion shall BURN!"

Before Fitzroy could do a thing, the woman was ambushed by Nene, who attacked with her sword. As she was ambushed, Fitzroy dropped her torch down below, and Mario caught it miraculously.

"And that...takes-a care of that," remarked Mario, as he blew out the flame on the torch. Took him a few tries. "Those Nopons did-a the dirty work for us!"

"Yeah, but where did they come from?" wondered Lucina, and would you know it, Shulk, Melia, and Riki arrived at the scene looking up at the Nopongers on the roof. "I take it you were responsible, Shulk..."

"I have to say, I do come up with some great plans..." smirked Shulk, watching as the Nopongers were still tangling with Fitzroy and the Vault Hunters, with Kino and Nene also in the fun. "...not that I want to brag."

"Nopongers make Riki proud," smiled Riki, who loved it when his fellow Nopons took to action. "But Kino and Nene...make Riki even more proud."

Cortex was back in his room with Handsome Jack, Comstock, Brio, and Uka. The evil genius went around the mansion, somehow without encountering Fitzroy or any of the Vault Hunters, and Handsome Jack and Comstock were about to give him his progress report.

"Dr. Cortex...your level of conviction is critically low," Comstock told the evil genius, greatly afflicting his confidence. "You cannot expect to be a man of this mansion, when your persuasion tactics are poor."

"I would play a sad violin for you sarcastically, but I don't have a violin with me," Handsome Jack said to Cortex, wanting to make him feel bad about himself. "Would've been a killer solo..."

"As I've said before, Cortex, you have much to learn. Maybe one day, you'll have the conviction to make everyone in this mansion submit to you."

"Seriously, I need to play a violin solo...if I don't find one soon, then the solo won't be as funny!"

Cortex: I have failed Comstock and Handsome Jack...back to square one. But I don't even want to read Pit's speech, it would be the end of me...and I can't depend on Brio, he'll get a big head. He has to stay in his lane.

"I'm ba-ack!" announced Pit, as he returned to Cortex's room. He must've annoyed Bradford so much, that the commander let him go. "You guys missed me?"

"Eh...not really, kiddo," replied Handsome Jack, although his response didn't faze Pit. "Did you have fun, while you were away?"

"I think I did; I was involved in some investigation, and the guy interrogating me let me go because he 'couldn't take it anymore'. And then he left. He might be a sociopath."

"Sure, kiddo, sure...but, Comstock and I are done with Cortex, so...yeah. Got nothing else to do."

"Also Mario was there, but he had to leave early. All because of some lady named Daisy Fitzroy, causing a ruckus."

"Daisy Fitzroy? Of the Vox Populi?" said Comstock as his eyes widened, not wanting to deal with Fitzroy. "It was nice getting to know you, doctor!" The old man shook Cortex's hand, before leaving the room immediately.

"Heh, what a guy...leaving because of some girl," snickered Handsome Jack, shaking his head at Comstock. "Imagine that..."

"And when I spoke with Mario earlier, he said that Fitzroy was with these guys, called Vault Hunters. Two girls, and two..."

"...and I'm out!" Handsome Jack was next to go, as he too shook Cortex's hand before leaving. "See you on the flippity flip, Cortex!"

"So about that speech..." Brio said to Cortex, who groaned and walked away. "...wait, Dr. Cortex, I'm not done! We can still make the speech work!"

Samus had a long talk with Tom Nook and Isabelle, in Master Hand's room. The bounty hunter would exit the room, and Zelda was the first person she saw.

"I take it that you spoke with the search committee?" Zelda asked Samus, who was showing little to no reaction. "What did they say?"

"They said...they said that I'm cut from the race," replied Samus, as Zelda's eyes widened in shock. "I'm no longer a candidate."

"Oh dear! What did you do to lose your candidacy? You didn't hurt anyone like Chrom did, did you?"

"No, but I could've gotten someone hurt...I surrendered a few scrap parts to some crazy teenager, and she made a few bombs and blew up the basement door outside. And there also some face-shot incident, which was just a big misunderstanding."

"I'm very sorry to hear about that, Samus. What are going to do now?"

"I dunno - I'm not losing any breath over my candidacy. It is what it is. Also, it's quite obvious who's going to win the gig..."

"And who would that be?" Samus just smirked at Zelda, as he walked away. Took Zelda a few seconds to figure it out. "Oh..."

With Fitzroy and the Vault Hunters taken care of by the Nopongers, it was time to take them back home. The teleportation device was now up and running - the broken power cord now fixed - and Fitzroy and the Vault Hunters were sent back to Columbia and Pandora, respectively, by .EXE. Handsome Jack and Comstock also headed back home, just to save their own hides.

But Booker, Elizabeth, and Claptrap? They asked to stick around the mansion, just a wee bit longer. Booker was playing a game of darts, with Mario and Shulk.

"Go Shulk - you can do it!" Riki cheered on for the Homs, with Kino, Nene, and the Nopongers behind him. Shulk threw a dart at the target, hitting the center, as the Nopons all cheered.

"Nice shot," Booker commended Shulk, with Elizabeth and Claptrap looking on and applauding. Shulk smiled in return, walking over to Melia as Mario stepped up to the plate.

"Those Nopons sure like it at the mansion," Melia told Shulk, smiling at the Nopons as Mario threw a dart at the target. "You wouldn't mind babysitting, do you?"

"Count me out, Melia - I have too much on my plate," grinned Shulk, unsure if he had the time for babysitting at all. "My daily life is busy enough as it...is?"

Shulk jumped back, when he saw the Lutece twins standing in his presence. The twins were still going around, asking people if they preferred cream or sugar.

"The question is simple..." said Rosalind, as she held up her plate for Shulk to see. "Cream..."

"...or sugar?" asked Robert, eagerly waiting to tally down Shulk on his blackboard in chalk.

"Cream..."

"...or sugar?

"Cream..."

"FACE SHOT!" shrieked Face McShooty, slightly ticked that he was still alive, as he frantically ran inside the gaming room. He ran around Shulk, Melia, and the Lutece Twins...before running out of energy and passing out on the floor.

"Knew I was forgetting someone..." said Claptrap as he looked at the winded McShooty, before looking up at Booker. "...is there by any chance you have a gun?"