Author's Note:
It actually happened...MINECRAFT STEVE IS IN SMASH! Or, as he is called in the game, Steve. I imagined that Steve's chances of being DLC were slim after Banjo got in, but he still made it. Steve, along with Alex, Zombie, and Enderman will be making their Smash Life debut later, in a chapter that'll be published after Minecraft Live 2020. As for this chapter...I had to delay it a bit, but only for a day (although it was updated much, much later than I wanted it to). Just to rewrite and rework some parts, here and there. Don't wanna stay up writing all night just to publish a new chapter for this story, ever again. So...enjoy!
Episode 248: Return Part 2
Master Hand had yet to return to the mansion, as he and Crazy Hand were likely finishing up their business back in Belarus. Despite that, a lot of stuff went down at the mansion, in a relatively short span of time.
First, Pit took Link and Cloud - the remaining two candidates for the man of the mansion job - and threw them inside the Empty Room, before barricading the door so that neither swordsman could escape. Then it was revealed through the mansion's security footage that Cortex was responsible for getting the male candidates (as well as Samus and Lucina) disqualified. Although it was X and Fuuka who outed Cortex, it was Brio who decided to speak up about Cortex after holding his tongue.
But it didn't stop there - after Cortex and Pit were kicked out of the mansion, Tom Nook and Isabelle were both kidnapped by Cranky Kong, who was working in kahoots with Brio. With the search committee out of the equation, Brio had assumed full control, asserting himself as having control of the mansion - all the while with Cranky Kong as his sidekick.
Again, Master Hand had no idea what was going on, as he had yet to make his return. Which meant that Mario and a few residents still had enough time to put the finishing touches on their decorations at the front of the mansion. While Mario continued to work away, he saw Jacky and Akira pushing out Master Hand's decoy Lamborghini into the driveway.
"Um, what are two doing?" Mario asked the two Virtua Fighters, who were pushing the decoy Lamborghini out from the mansion's garage.
"I dunno...trying to save everyone's butt?!" replied Jacky, once he and akira were done with their task; pushing the decoy was a lot harder than it looked. "Master Hand would freak if he found out that Itsuki sold his 'dream car'."
"A dream car he couldn't even drive himself," said Akira, who believed that Jacky's car was vastly superior to Master Hand's Lamborghini. Naturally, he was being biased, since Jacky was his best friend after all. "Stupid waste of money."
"Looks like we got everything done!" announced King Dedede, before stepping off the porch and taking a look around at all the decorations on the mansion. "Only thing we're probably missing are some balloons."
"But I thought-a that Toad brought some..." spoke Mario, before he realized what had happened to Toad. And neither he, nor anyone else, cared to save him. "...oh, that is right. Toad will-a be coming back any minute now."
Toad: Hey, up here! Up here! *camera pans up to Toad, who is floating through the sky while holding onto balloons* Can you tell Mario that I'm making my way over to 5th Avenue? That's where I'll be making my stop, hopefully...sure could use a needle right about now!
Just then, a taxi drove up to the mansion's driveway, driven by none other than B.D. Joe. B.D. Joe was usually a fixture, bringing a usually surprising visitor every time he stopped by.
"Howdy, B.D. Joe!" Mario greeted the taxi driver, who got out of his car; interestingly enough, B.D. Joe had only brought himself. No passengers. "Uh, where-a are your passengers?"
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages...give it up, for Master Hand and Crazy Hand!" exclaimed B.D. Joe, with almost forced excitement, as he had his arms out wide. The taxi driver looked around, expecting someone to show up. "I said..."
B.D. Joe and the others wouldn't have to wait any longer, as both Master Hand and Crazy Hand made their grand appearing. Well, it was really that grand, as they just magically appeared in the front yard of the mansion, but in their minds it was spectacular.
"Sorry for the hold-up, B.D. Joe," Master Hand apologized to the taxi driver, who frowned and waved off the giant hand. "Crazy Hand and I were busy arguing over who gets to appear first. You know, menial stuff..."
"Yeah, whatever...so am I still getting paid or not?" In response to B.D. Joe's question, Master Hand let out a very hearty laugh, and Crazy Hand would laugh along with him.
"You actually believed me? Oh man, that's too rich! You really are gullible...move along now, we have no need for you anymore."
"I can't believe you, Master Hand! You really played me for a sucker. And I'm not gonna let you get away with..."
"The man said MOVE ALONG, so MOVE!" boomed Crazy Hand, as B.D. Joe hurriedly got back inside his taxi and drove away. A very wise life decision.
"Ah, humans...they can be so ignorant sometimes," sighed Master Hand, in a somewhat happy tone, as he glanced at the Smash Mansion. "Home, sweet..."
"SURPRISE!" shouted Mario and the residents, greeting Master Hand and Crazy Hand with a show of jazz hands and confetti. Where they got the confetti from, no one even knew.
"Well if it isn't my favorite people in the world! Or some of my favorite people...hey Mario! Hey Terry Bogard! Hey King Dedede! Hey decoy Lamborghini sitting in the driveway!"
"Aw crap, he knows..." panicked Jacky, as if he expected Master Hand to be fooled so easily. Master Hand hovered over to the decoy Lamborghini, before looking around for his actual Lamborghini.
"Jacky, Akira, where is my precious Lamborghini? I bet you got it all furnished for me, while I was off enjoying my vacation!"
"Funny thing about your Lamborghini...something happened to it." Jacky felt sweat running down his face, as he was feeling the pressure. "Well, nothing bad, uh, it's just that...
"...Itsuki sold your Lamborghini to a car dealership," admitted Akira, who was too chicken to even look up at Master Hand. Jacky gave Akira a crazy look, hoping that the fighter realized what he had done.
"He sold my Lamborghini? Why?" questioned Master Hand, not sounding angry at all; he sounded more disappointed than anything.
"Anna touched your Lamborghini!" Mario called out to Master Hand, who gasped in shock and horror as he gave Mario his full attention. "She even took a ride in it, too!"
"She did WHAT?! Ooh, that woman...she tarnishes just about anything she touches!" Now Master Hand was angry, as his deep hatred towards Anna rekindled. The giant hand was officially back.
"You're not angry about your Lamborghini being sold anymore?" Akira curiously asked Master Hand, slowly finding the courage to look up at the giant hand.
"It was tainted by Anna, so it's a relic of the past now. I loved that car, even wanted to give her a very special name...but she's in a better place now, I hope."
Mario: I was only looking out for-a Jacky and Akira...didn't want them-a to die over some silly sports-a car being sold. Want to save-a yourself from dying at the hands-a of Master Hand? Just bring up Anna, and all-a of Master Hand's wrath vanishes away. In a snap. *snaps his fingers*
"How are Tom Nook and Isabelle coming along with their search, Mario?" Master Hand asked the plumber, expecting to hear a good report about the search committee. "Have they made their decisions yet?"
"They have decided-a who the woman of the mansion will be," answered Mario, as Master Hand was very pleased to hear about this. "As for the man-a of the mansion..."
"Hold that thought, I have a more pressing question...where's all the fanfare?" Mario saw that question coming from less than a mile away. "Where's my welcome back concert?"
"You...wanted a concert? Master Hand, there was so much-a we could do...are these decorations not enough-a for you?"
"Of course they're not enough, you dolt!" Offended by Mario's question, Master Hand would slap Mario silly, leaving a red mark on the plumber's face. "Where's Mase? Where's Mark Morrison, to welcome me back? Where's the music, and all that jazz?"
"I should be asking the SAME from those miscreants at the tower!" fumed Crazy Hand, having a bone to pick with all the tower denizens. "How dare they not GREET me upon arrival!"
"Master Hand we couldn't do a concert, we don't have the time-a or space to..." Mario started, only to be slapped by Master Hand once again. Only harder this time.
"Don't give me any of that crap!" Master Hand boomed at Mario, who was rubbing his sore, reddened face. "I've given you weeks to prepare for my return, and all you have to show for me is a bunch of crappy decorations. Despicable!"
"How was I even supposed-a to..." Tired of Mario, Master Hand would slap the plumber a third time, as the residents looking on winced in pain. Some even retreated inside the mansion, for their own safety.
"You sure know how to let me down, Mario...now take me inside the mansion! I better expect a very warm welcome the moment I come in."
Master Hand would receive a warm welcome, although it wasn't one he expected. When the giant hand entered the mansion with Mario, he was greeted by Min Min, who was smiling while holding a giant bowl of noodles.
"Ni hao, Master Hand!" Min Min greeted the giant hand, before offering him the bowl of noodles. She could tell how elated Master Hand felt.
"Look who it is - Min Min!" exclaimed Master Hand, overjoyed to finally meet the Chinese martial artist in person. "I see you have prepared a bowl of noodles for me. You're much better than this loser right here, Mario."
"Really, I'm a loser now?" frowned Mario, as Mario giddily accepted the bowl of noodles from Min Min. "Someone sure is ungrateful after coming home from vacation..."
"Well nobody told you to decorate the mansion with crap, Mario." Master Hand held the bowl of noodles in the palm of his hand, and closed his hand tight in a fist. Min Min looked confused, as she heard some chewing noises from Master Hand. Once he was done, Master Hand opened his hand back up...and the noodles were all gone.
"Uh..." said an understandably bewildered Min Min, as the large bowl remained in the palm of Master Hand's...hand. Not a single noodle was seen.
"That certainly hit the spot! Thank you, Min Min - you Mintendo folks sure know how to make some excellent noodles!"
Min Min: So Master Hand...has a mouth? Does he have eyes and a mouth, too? And ears? Should I even ask if he has any reproductive organs, or should I save that conversation for another day?
"Greetings, Master Hand!" Brio greeted the giant hand, entering the foyer; the genius was exuding loads of confidence. "Welcome back to the Smash Mansion - which, yours truly, invented."
"Ha ha, that's a good one!" laughed Master Hand, as Brio took the giant hand's remark with stride; even he knew better than to cross with Master Hand. "You're so funny when you're delusional."
"Dr. Brio has been working with-a Cortex, to help him win-a the man of the mansion gig," Mario explained to Master Hand, as a still bewildered Min Min took the large bowl from Master Hand and retreated back to the kitchen. "He served-a as his so-called 'VP'."
"A VP? Cortex had some kind of campaign going on? Wish I was there to see it. I assume by the way you spoke in past tense that the campaign is over..."
"Alas, I'm afraid it is..." Brio said to Master Hand, shaking his head in reflection of Cortex's actions over the past weeks. "...Cortex screwed over the other candidates, since he was that desperate to win the gig."
"So he had to sabotage the others just to win, did he? The poor guy just couldnt help himself, could he?" Brio flashed a devious smile, sensing how angry Master Hand was, before reverting back to his disappointed look.
"Fortunately, the search committee took care of Cortex, and sent him out of the mansion. Because Pit had helped Cortex, he got sent out as well."
"Very good! Nice to know that Tom Nook knows how to use his authority. And Isabelle...she's not as soft as I make her out to be. Might as well stop teasing her for it."
"Is the search committee about to make-a their decision?" Mario asked Brio, who nervously bit his bottom lip as he eyed around the foyer. "They promised that they would ask-a for my input..."
"The search committee...the search committee...has named me the man of the mansion." Master Hand and Mario were both caught by surprise, startled by this revelation.
"But Link and Cloud were the last-a of the male candidates? Did some-a thing happen to them?"
"Link and Cloud, erm, were caught doing some illegal activity within the confides of the mansion. Therefore, both were disqualified, and I was named the man of the mansion, with no other viable option in mind."
"Sounds like a bunch of hogwash..." said Master Hand, having a very sneaky suspicion that some major trouble was afoot. "...let me speak with Tom Nook and Isabelle!"
"No, no, Master Hand...you just got back from your vacation." Brio stopped in front of Master Hand, before the giant hand could give the search committee a piece of his mind. "Why not go to your room, and relax?"
"You know what, I could use a bit more rest...some of those women in Belarus gave me a hard time! I'll speak with Tom Nook and Isabelle later."
"Yes, yes you should..." So Master Hand went down to his room, with Brio all smiles as Master Hand floated away. Mario gave Brio a skeptical glare, fairly certain that the genius was up to no good.
"I'm gonna assume-a that you aren't telling the truth," Mario confronted Brio, as he wanted answers from the genius right away. "Did Link and-a Cloud really..."
"Silence, Mario...you're way too tense," Brio said to Mario, silencing him by placing his index finger on the plumber's lips. "Why don't you join me and Cranky Kong outside, in the backyard patio? We'll discuss anything you need to know there."
"Got my eye on-a you, Dr. Brio..." Mario kept a close watch of Brio, as he followed the genius down the hallway. The buddy cops would pass by, and Brio stopped to speak with them.
"Can you boys do me a quick favor?" Brio whispered to the buddy cop duo, pulling his head close as Mario suspiciously looked on. "It's not much, but..."
Serena: This is it - today is the day where I reveal to Crazy Hand the five candidates that I hand-picked to be the man of the tower. Since Waluigi defied expectations, and gained favor from those in the tower, I have added him as a sixth candidate. Crazy Hand won't like it, but if the tower folk can change their mind of Waluigi, then so can Crazy Hand...maybe I'm asking too much for him.
Unlike Master Hand, Crazy Hand wasn't all that bitter about not having a warm welcome at the Assist Tower. Some of the tower denizens dismissed the giant hand when he made his return, but Crazy Hand took it all in stride. And now that Crazy Hand was back, Serena now had the opportunity to show the giant hand the work she did while he was away.
"I've picked out six candidates, to be the potential man of the tower," Serena explained to Crazy Hand, as she led the giant hand through the hallways of the mansion. "Just wanted to know if you were fine with it..."
"Of course I'm FINE with it - I get to bully TWO packmules now!" exclaimed Crazy Hand, excited to see who the five candidates were. He was hoping that at least one or two of them were pushovers. "Show me where they are!"
"I've gathered them in the lounge." Serena and Crazy Hand soon arrived at the lounge, where five of the six candidates were waiting. "I thought they were pretty solid choices."
"Let me SEE for myself..." Crazy Hand took a gander at the five candidates that were present - Alucard, Dr. Wily, Mr. Resetti, Dr. Wright, and Ghirahim. "Dr. Wily, too old...Mr. Resetti, too mouthy...Ghirahim, too perverted...Alucard, too moody...Dr. Wright..."
"Let me guess, you're gonna call me nerdy aren't you?" Dr. Wright asked Crazy Hand before taking his glasses off, as if that would sway the giant hand's mind. "Go on, go ahead, do your worst..."
"...actually, I was gonna call you UGLY, but nerdy works just fine!" His confidence shattered, Dr. Wright placed his glasses back on his face. "Serena, where on earth is the SIXTH candidate?"
"He's right here!" shouted Waluigi, as he leaped down from the ceiling and stuck an almost perfect landing. Nearly tore a tendon in the process. "Ladies and gentlemen...the Wah-Man is here!"
"...but seriously, Serena, where is that SIXTH candidate?" Crazy Hand had completely ignored Waluigi's presence, and Waluigi strongly felt some type of way about it.
"Um, hello? The sixth candidate is right here!" Waluigi waved his arms to grab Crazy Hand's attention, and Crazy Hand stared at the lanky man like he was some insignificant spack.
"I'm confused, is the sixth candidate imaginary? Or INVISIBLE? Or both, at the same time?"
"That would be highly impossible, Crazy Hand," stated Alucard, as Crazy Hand slapped the dhampir; although the slap was harder than Master Hand's, Alucard didn't even flinch.
"I proved my worth to Serena, and showed her that I would make for a superb man of the tower one day," Waluigi defended himself to Crazy Hand, who wished he had some eyes to roll. "In the swoop of just one day, one day, the people in this tower started respecting me!"
"How much did you have to PAY them to respect you?" Waluigi felt so insulted by Crazy Hand's question, that he wanted to punch the giant hand in the face...if he even had one. Even then, that wouldn't be the wisest thing for Waluigi to do.
"You know what, Crazy Hand? I'll show you! You'll see!" Waluigi stormed out of the lounge, and came back seconds later with Shadow. "Shadow, tell how awesome those homemade quesadillas were!"
"Homemade quesadillas...?" frowned Shadow, before he remembered the homemade quesadillas he ate last week. "Oh yeah, the ones Chef Kawasaki made. Waluigi gave him the recipe, and the rest...was history."
"It was thanks to me that Chef Kawasaki became a more respected chef," Waluigi stated to Crazy Hand, who didn't seem to change his mind. "I did that man a huge solid!"
Shadow: Those "homemade quesadillas" were the talk of the tower, apparently. Didn't expect people to go crazy over melted cheese spray sandwiched between potato chips. Knuckles even told Rouge all about the quesadillas, like she would even care. I would've told her the truth, but Waluigi had too much pride on the line.
"Not only that, but I helped Tingle, and the Squid Sisters, and even Tiki!" continued Waluigi, and Crazy Hand still wasn't impressed by the lanky man. "I demonstrated great leadership skills that those five over there wish they could have!"
"You were a complete afterthought, until Serena deluded herself into giving you a chance," Ghirahim said to Waluigi, who angrily shook his fist at the demon lord. "You still have very much to prove, Waluigi..."
"I proved everything that needed to be proved last week! What more do you people possibly need?" Waluigi was going to continue his tirade, until Crazy Hand confronted the lanky man, needing to get something off his chest.
"Waluigi, I'll be extremely honest with you..." Crazy Hand said to the lanky man, speaking to him in a serious and subdued tone. "...you just ain't it, chief." Waluigi was devastated, as his mouth fell agape.
"Whaddaya mean, I'm not it? What don't you see in me, Crazy Hand?" As the devastation took its hold over Waluigi, Crazy Hand turned his attention to the five other candidates.
"Dr. Wily, Ghirahim, the rest of you...follow me," the giant hand said to the five candidates, as Waluigi fell down to his knees. "I'll have to FORCE myself to pick one of you!"
"You snooze, you lose, hehehe..." Mr. Resetti taunted Waluigi, who got down on all fours as the five candidates followed Crazy Hand out of the lounge. Waluigi thought for sure that Crazy Hand would give him a chance, but he was being way too optimistic.
"I tried so hard...I tried so hard...and I fail," said Waluigi, beating up on himself as he slammed his fist repeatedly on the floor. Serena came over to comfort the lanky man.
"It's okay, Waluigi, Crazy Hand just didn't give you a fair chance," Serena said to the lanky man, as she patted him comfortingly on his back. "This is no excuse for you to be so down on yourself!"
"Oh, Serena, I need you THIS instant!" Crazy Hand called out to the keeper from the hallway. "I'll need you to BE THERE to see who your fellow PACK MULE will be!"
"Just think about what I said, okay?" Serena had this to say to Waluigi, before leaving the lounge. "I'm coming, Crazy Hand!" As Serena ran down the hallway, Shadow, who remained in the lounge (although he didn't know why) looked down upon Waluigi.
"You are such a weak, pathetic man..." the hedgehog shook his head at Waluigi, wondering how the lanky man got so far in life. Provided that he even went far to begin with. "...can't get whatever you want with that defeatist attitude."
"You're right...Serena's right!" exclaimed Waluigi, ending his pity party and getting his mojo back as he confidently sprung up to his feet. "I won't let Crazy Hand get me down. I'm gonna show him what I'm really made of!"
"Last time you tried to 'prove' yourself to Crazy Hand, you ended up in the hospital. Jumping off to show how 'immortal' you were was a stupid idea on your part."
"Nuh uh, I ain't doing that again. This time around, I'll prove Crazy Hand the right away! Road to respect, here I come!"
While Waluigi set out to prove to Crazy Hand that he was worthy enough to be a candidate for man of the tower, fellow lovable loser Cortex was traversing through the Seattle woods, with Pit. The evil genius was exiled out of the mansion by his own compadre, Brio, and was left to wander around with his assistant, and the mask that bullied him 24/7.
"You stink, Cortex, you know that right?" Uka asked the evil genius, making sure that he knew what was up. "Only you would go from being a candidate for some authority role, to getting kicked out of the mansion! By your so-called best friend, no less!"
"Brio is still my friend, Uka..." Cortex kindly informed the floating mask, who couldn't help but snort at such a disputable statement. "...he was just, uh, in his feelings."
Cortex: Woe is me, as it has been for most of my life...I've been booted out of the mansion, by my own best friend, and I'm left here to wander around, wondering when my next meal will be! (It's not that serious, since I have a wallet and I can buy whatever fast food I like, but it could get that dire soon.) I'm stuck with Pit, but...it could be worse!
Uka: *appearing from behind* Could be worse? What could possibly be worse than being stuck with Pit?
Cortex: Um...being stuck with N. Gin? Because at least Pit wouldn't act like a gigantic kiss-up every other minute!
Uka: Admit it, you were gonna mention me, weren't you? Well too bad for me, and yourself, I have to be stuck with YOU! Do I like it? NO! But if me being around you keeps you from dying, then so be it!
Cortex: D-Did you say that you wanted to be around me just to preserve my life? You really do care about me, Uka!
Uka: I never said that, Dr. Cortex...why are you smiling like that, why do you have your arms out wide? GET AWAY FROM ME!
"I think we should go back to the mansion, and sue the crap out of Brio," Pit suggested to Cortex, before triumphantly raising his fist in the air. "Gotta fight for our rights!"
"On what grounds could we sue Brio on?" questioned Cortex; he and Pit could use the courtroom in the mansion, but that would be a waste. "Face it, Pit, there's nothing we can do..."
"So, that's how it's gonna be? We're just gonna throw in the towel, and accept defeat? Is that our course of action?"
"I reckon that the search committee would do everything in their power to keep us out of the mansion, so we could learn our lesson. That being said..."
"And? You're gonna let some crackhead raccoon and his canine friend put you down? That's not the Cortex that I know!"
"Stop it Pit, just stop it! There's nothing we can do to change things. I don't know when the search committee will let us back in the mansion, but for now, we must do what we can to survive."
"'Do what we can to survive'...what a bunch of crap that is." Cortex was taken back by Pit's remark, and the evil genius watched as the angel walked away. "The others were right about you, Dr. Cortex...you really are a weakling."
"Don't listen to those people, they're nothing but liars..." Cortex tried to chase after Pit, who picked up the pace and ran off when Cortex got closer. Having been betrayed by his own assistant, poor Cortex was left all alone...but he still had Uka to keep him company.
"At least you still have me, Dr. Cortex...sadly," Uka said to the evil genius, who was hanging his head low in shame. "Come on, Cortex, having me around isn't that bad!"
"Maybe Pit is right...maybe I am a weakling..." Cortex was beginning to doubt himself, as he walked away. "...I just don't have it in me to stand up for myself."
"Cortex, that's the most self-aware thing you've ever said...I'm proud of you." Uka expected a "thank you" from Cortex, but instead he saw Cortex walking away in sadness. "Hey, Cortex, wait up for me!"
News slowly got around the mansion that Cortex and Pit were evicted from the mansion, the buddy cops went about telling the news to others. Including Viridi and the Crash clan.
"What? My precious Pit got kicked out of the mansion?" Viridi said to Toon Link, after the Hylian delivered the news to the goddess of nature. Her demeanor sure changed quickly.
"Eh, mostly," replied Toon Link, as Viridi was worried to the brim about Pit's well-being. "Cortex and Pit got busted for screwing over the candidates, and they got punished by being thrown out of the mansion."
"Why couldn't they just throw that lousy Cortex out instead? Poor Pit, he can't survive on his own! And being with Cortex would only drag him down!"
Crunch: How does Viridi go from worrying about Pit, to wanting to strangle him, and then back to worrying about the guy? That girl would be great in the Emotional Olympics.
"I'd say they both deserved it," Young Link offered his two cents, as a suddenly distressed Viridi rubbed her hands through her hair. "Some people just can't win fair and square..."
"Snitches get stitches, cheaters get...skeeters, or something like that," said Toon Link, as he struggled to think of a catchy rhyme. "Either way, Cortex and Pit got exactly what was coming for them."
"Both of them should be lucky we weren't the ones dealing justice to them. Hylia knows how ugly that would've turned out...would've had to choke 'em out!"
"With those measly hands?" snorted Coco, as the buddy cops reacted by pointing their bows and arrows at the blonde bandicoot. "You're not intimidating me, just wanna let you know that..."
"So you like lying to our faces, huh?" Toon Link asked Coco, as he wrote up a ticket and handed it to the blonde bandicoot. "If you can't do the time, don't do the..."
"...don't do the crime, yeah, I get it. Why don't you and Young Link run along now?" So the buddy cops departed from Viridi and the Crash clan, heading down the hallway.
"This is horrible, Pit is gonna get killed out there!" fretted Viridi, acting as if Pit was stuck in the wilderness and had no means of escape. "He barely has any street smarts to keep himself alive..."
"'Barely' having any street smarts is pretty generous for Pit," remarked Aku, before Viridi shot the floating mask a quick glare. "Uh, I mean, what do you think we should do to find Pit, Viridi?"
"Kirby and Incineroar usually knows where Pit is, whenever he's away from the mansion. Oh, Pit...he loves running off when running errands." Viridi said the last sentence in a romantic manner, looking very entranced as she had a smile on her face.
"Um, Viridi? Are you still there?" Coco asked the goddess of nature, as Crash waved his hand in front of Viridi's face. When that didn't work, Crash loudly clapped his hands near Viridi's left ear.
"...huh?" Viridi snapped out of her trance thanks to Crash, and saw that she was still with the Crash clan. "What was I saying about Kirby and Incineroar?"
Link and Cloud were chilling in the Empty Room, with Link trying to open the door but to absolutely no avail. It was pitch black in the Empty Room, until Cloud took out his cellphone and turned on his flashlight.
"Ah, there we go," the swordsman remarked, as he shone his flashlight on Link trying to pry the door open with his Master Sword. "Sure thought you could use a little light on your situation..."
"Ha ha, very funny..." Link responded sarcastically, using the same kind of response whenever Sans told one of his punny jokes. "...don't know how you people could stand sitting in the darkness for so long..."
"Like I said before, I'm used to being inside this room...all I can say is, I'm glad to have you as some company, this time around."
"And why do you say that? It's not just because we're best friends, is it?"
"It's not so much that, it's just...you've always been very tolerable. And you also tolerate a lot."
"Speak for yourself - you tolerate all sorts of crap ever since you stepped foot in the mansion! I'm surprised you haven't lost it yet."
"Yes, I have tolerated a lot...from the residents, and from you." That got Link to stop, as he turned around and looked at Cloud.
"Tolerated what exactly?" Link would put his sword away, as he was interested in knowing what Cloud had to say about him.
"I remember how you were before you became a candidate...how you imitated the Joker, how crazy you were about your truck, and that one time you tried to be Yukari's 'special entertainment' when she was sick. You sure have changed a lot, Link."
"Yeah, I guess you're right about that..." Link sheepishly smiled, looking down at the floor as he grabbed his arm. "...don't know what had gotten over me back then."
"If I had to guess, you just wanted to prove to everyone that you were more than just a hero. Truth be told, I think you should just stick to what you do best...being a hero. That Pokemon expedition sure screwed your head on straight."
"But how can I be a hero, being stuck at this mansion? The only things I can do is shoot arrows and use my sword, and even that's not enough."
"There's more to being a hero than that, you know...Mario knows how to be one, without doing any of the things you mentioned. Sure, he may not show it from time to time, but he knows how to get the job done."
"Huh, come to think of it...you're right, Cloud. Maybe I'm just thinking about it too literally..."
"You'll figure it out eventually, it'll just take some time. Now why don't you make yourself useful, and find a way to get that door open?"
The Crash Clan and Viridi went to go look for Kirby and Incineroar, eventually finding them in Cortex's room. Kirby and Incineroar were seen going through Cortex's belongings, searching through his underwear drawer and whatnot.
"What in the world..." said Kirby, perplexed, as he pulled out the speedo Young Link had found in episode 244. The pink puffball shuddered, before tossing the speedo away. "...men and their questionable swimwear. At least it's not Captain Falcon's mankini..."
"Kirby, Incineroar, what are you boys doing going through Cortex's stuff?" Aku asked the two pals as he and the others entered the room. "Did you even ask first?"
"Pit claimed that Cortex was set up, after the buddy cops 'exposed' Cortex for being a drug dealer. Also said the evidence was in this room. We're looking to see if..."
"Cortex? A drug dealer?" questioned Coco, before letting out a slight chuckle. She always imagined that Cortex looked like a drug addict. "I have to admit, that's kinda funny. How do the buddy cops even know that Cortex dealt drugs?"
"That's what Incineroar and I are trying to find out. The evidence is in his room, supposedly, but we haven't found anything of note..."
Kirby: Aside from Cortex's...erm, speedo, I found a bunch of other interesting trinkets that belong to Cortex. Specifically some fuzzy dice, some Academy of Evil yearbook, and this strange love letter to Tiki. *pulls out love letter* Wanna hear some of it? Let me read you the beginning of the last paragraph.. *clears throat* "I would like to thank you for being a very supportive friend, Tiki. One day I shall pick you up, and bench-press you! Daily!" Who would say that to a woman, let alone another human being?
"I take it you boys haven't seen Pit around..." Viridi asked Kirby and Incineroar, who were now looking underneath Cortex's bed. All they saw was a bunch of food crumbs, and toenail clippings.
"No we haven't, not since breakfast," replied Kirby, moving away from the bed as he took a look inside Cortex's closet. "I can assume that he's up to no good..."
"Well he's working with Cortex...again." Hearing that almost made Kirby feel disappointed. "Since you don't even know where Pit is..."
"Woah, so they kicked him and Pit out of the mansion, just like that?" Roy was heard from the hallway, as Viridi paid an attentive ear. Viridi looked out of the room, and saw Roy passing by with Falco, X, and Fuuka.
"Both of them got hit with the indefinite ban," replied X, leaving Viridi even more worried about Pit than ever. "After they got kicked out, that's when Brio and Cranky kidnapped Tom Nook and Isabelle, and ran off."
"Dr. Brio, and Cranky Kong...what an odd pairing that is," snorted Falco, wondering how long the power trip of Brio and Crank would last. "And don't give me any crap about me and Katt, a bird and a cat can make love just like humans can..."
"We weren't going to give you crap for it anyways..." As X and company headed down the hallway, Viridi was left nervous, hoping that Pit would be fine by the time she found him.
"Honk honk?" a honking sound was heard, as Viridi looked down and saw a goose - Cortex's pet goose. Viridi picked him up, and stroked him gently with her hand.
"Would you look at that - this poor goose is all alone!" said Viridi, seeing that the goose had nobody around to keep him company. "And with Cortex gone..."
"I'd reckon that Cortex barely even took care of that goose, during his campaign and all," assumed Kirby, as he looked on Cortex's dresser. Lots of unopened bags of bird seed. "Let's take care of the goose, and worry about Pit later."
"But what if Pit gets himself in some trouble? I'd hate for him to..."
"You're acting like Pit's never been outside before...he'll be just fine, Viridi."
Mario joined Brio and Cranky Kong outside, in the mansion's backyard patio near the pool. Mario was sitting in a lawn chair, with Brio pouring a glass of grape juice for the plumber.
"You may or may not know this about me, Mario, but I've always had an inferiority complex," Brio said to the plumber, taking his own glass of juice as he took a seat in a lawn chair in-between Mario and Cranky Kong.
"Eh, I've always known - just-a by seeing how you act," replied Mario, as Brio, who was sipping from his glass, did a spit take. "You're not-a fooling anyone, doctor!"
"Oh my, I never knew it was that obvious! I try my best to keep it hidden. It's an insecurity of mine that I like to keep hidden."
"That's perfectly understandable - I have secrets myself-a that I don't want the others to know. Like for instance, I would never tell-a my wife that I love Korean pop-a music! Only the girl-a groups, though."
"I have secrets, too - I once killed thirty men, at the same time!" confessed Cranky Kong, leading to some very concerned looks from Mario and Brio. "Killed 'em with kindness, of course."
Cranky Kong: Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong may not know this, but I was one heck of a vigilante, back in my youth. When I wasn't kidnapping women or fighting off exterminators, I was out in the streets, beating the snot out of any unfortunate lad foolish enough to look me in the eye. I had a very bad reputation, mind you; they almost had to kick me, because I was causing too much trouble! That's when I started living in the sewers; you could get away with all sorts of stuff there. Young kids these days just don't know how good I had it!
"I used to be wrong about you, Mario..." Brio said to the plumber, alarming him as he took a sip from his glass. "When people talked about how great of a person you are, I thought of them as liars...but now I see myself, that they spoke the truth."
"You're not so bad-a yourself, Dr. Brio," replied Mario, unknowingly feeding the genius' ego as Brio smiled brightly. "Even if your whole-a 'I invented everything' schtick tends-a to get old..."
"It's not a schtick, it's the truth!" Brio yelled and shook his fist at Mario, getting droplets of saliva in the plumber's face. The genius then cooled himself down, sitting back down in his seat. "But I tend to digress."
"Not that often that I get to chat-a like this. You were always busy being Cortex's right-hand man, while I was holding down-a the fort back home..."
"Ah, yes, Cortex's right-hand man...but you know, Mario, I always longed to be more than just being second-in-command. How long have I desired to be the alpha dog..."
"Well you're looking at an alpha dog right-a here." Mario had a big grin on his face, which faded away after a couple of seconds. "Okay, maybe not anymore, since I moved-a out of the mansion, but I still have the chops."
"For years, I have always dreamed of being the alpha - that's why I took initiative two weeks ago at the trivia contest, to prove to you and the others how great I could be. And now, I have the finest opportunity in the world to prove myself even further..."
"What do you mean-a by that?" Curious, Mario watched as Brio slowly stood up from his chair, before feeling precarious as Brio took out his ray gun.
"The time has come to show this mansion what I am truly made of. As for you, Mario...you have a front row seat of my brilliance!"
"Mario, watch out!" shouted Cappy, moving away from Mario's head as Brio fired a plasma shot at Mario from his ray gun. Mario soon found himself trapped inside a bubble hovering in the air, with no way of getting himself out.
"Dr. Brio? What is this?!" Mario frowned at the genius, as he banged on the bubble that was encasing him. The surface was indestructible, hard as a rock; nothing that Mario could do would break him out.
"No longer will I have to worry about being a second fiddle. The time has come for me to become the mansion's top dog! Cranky Kong, I require a string..."
"One string, coming right up!" Cranky replied as he handed Brio a string; Brio used said string to attach to the bubble that encased Mario.
"Here you are, Cranky - your very own balloon!" Brio handed the bubble encasing Mario to Cranky on a string, as Cranky giddily accepted the "balloon" while Mario cautiously looked on.
"Yippee! About time I had my own balloon! Donkey Kong and Diddy kept hogging all the good ones, so now we're even."
"You are a very conniving man, Dr. Brio..." Mario said to the genius, his hands pressed against the bubble as Brio smirked and put his ray gun away. "...and I thought-a I could trust you!"
"Cry all you want, Mario...it won't matter in the slightest," Brio told the plumber, ready to carry out his next course of action. "With you neutralized, Cranky and I can take over the mansion, and rule with an iron fist!"
"Then once we're done with that, we'll take over the story!" added Cranky, making Mario roll his eyes with his fondness of breaking the fourth wall. "We'll kill the author, and write our own story!"
"Patience, Cranky, patience...we'll worry about the author at a later time. Let's just focus on the present, for now..." Watching all this unfold was Cappy, who slowly backed away to keep himself from Brio.
"Mario sure could use my help right now..." the talking hat remarked, as he flew inside the mansion. All it was all a matter of finding the right person...
Ryo Sakazaki was in the Pokemon sanctuary, getting some sparring practice in. His sparring partner was Urshifu, the one that knew Single Strike style...no, the Urshifu didn't know Aura Sphere. Or Focus Blast.
"Ryo! Ryo!" Waluigi shouted the fighter's name as he ran inside the sanctuary. "I really need your help, Ryo."
"What do you possibly need help with?" Ryo asked Waluigi, as he put his sparring match with Urshifu on hold. "Got yourself tangled in another love triangle, I assume?"
"Crazy Hand just returned to the tower, and he doesn't think that I have what it takes to be a man of the tower. I need you to help me prove to him that I can be a leader of men!"
"So basically, you want to prove absolutely nothing to Crazy Hand." Waluigi was greatly offended by Ryo's remark, gasping mightily as he clutched his pearls. "Sorry, just speaking the truth..."
Shadow: I have zero faith in Waluigi being a "leader of men". When I think of a leader of men, I think of a respected man who is courageous, makes great decisions, and is able to withstand any adversity he comes face to face with. When I think of Waluigi, all I see is a deranged coward who is practically synonymous with failure. Waluigi is too scared to kill a housefly in the bathroom shower; would anyone with a brain trust him to be a leader?
"Look, Waluigi, I would help you out, but I'm busy at the moment," Ryo said to the lanky man, using his sparring practice with Urshifu as a cop-out. "I can't just stop my training and..."
"Ryo...you're my only hope," Waluigi said to the fighter, looking earnestly into his eyes; Ryo had to back away, as he was feeling slightly creeped out. "I have already gained your respect, and now, I need to gain the respect of Crazy Hand."
"Has Crazy Hand ever respected anyone? Aside from Master Hand? This is a no-win situation for you, Waluigi - just give it up."
"Waluigi, Ryo, I have some bad news!" Cappy said to the lanky man and fighter as he floated inside the sanctuary, frantic and all out of shape after witnessing what happened to Mario. "Mario is being held captive by Brio, and he has Cranky Kong as his sidekick!"
"He seriously picked out that dumb gorilla as a 'sidekick'?" questioned Ryo, who had a very bad flashback of Cranky messing with him at a past Thanksgiving dinner. "Huh, and I thought he was less lousy than Cortex..."
"Mario is in trouble and needs to be rescued?" inquired Waluigi, rising up to the occasion as he put his hands on his hips. "Sounds like a job for...the Wah-Man!"
"Do you really want to help out Mario, Waluigi? Knowing you, you'd probably make the situation even worse!"
"No, Ryo, I need this shining moment! Crazy Hand claims that I ain't it...but I'll show him that I am it! This is an opportunity of a lifetime...well, for me, that is."
"Well if you're going through with this...then I have no choice but to come along. Just to ensure that you don't mess up..." Waluigi saw Ryo working with him as an absolute win, in his book.
Having gotten some rest, Master Hand up and about in his room, making sure that Tom Nook and Isabelle kept everything tidy while he was away. The giant hand heard a knock at his bedroom door, meaning that someone wanted to see him.
"Come in!" shouted Master Hand, as Sonic and Knuckles came inside the room; both the hedgehog and echidna looked solemn. "Sonic the Hedgehog and Knuckles the Echidna! Lovely seeing you boys again."
"Sup Master Hand..." greeted Sonic, daring not to share any info on why he and Knuckles looked so bummed out. That meant Master Hand had to guess.
"Why the long faces, you two? Are you really that sad I came back to the mansion? If so, then why did you come to visit me?! I don't want any of your sadness!"
"We're not sad about your return or anything, it's just...Piranha Plant and Petey Piranha still have the virus." Immediately afraid, Master Hand gasped out of fright as he hovered away.
"Th-They're still infected with that horrid pathogen?! Please tell me you and Knuckles did the honorable thing, and kept those two out of the mansion..."
"Actually, we'd thought that you would wanna see for yourself..." replied Knuckles, before looking outside the room and beckoning to someone down the hallway. "...come on in, boys." Soon Piranha Plant and Petey Piranha came inside Master Hand's room, both wearing masks. Master Hand was scared out of his mind.
"GET THOSE MISCREANTS AWAY FROM ME!" shrieked Master Hand, as he cornered himself in the corner of his room. Sonic and Knuckles were laughing quietly at Master Hand's expense. "You let those two anywhere close to me, and everyone in this room's a goner..."
Master Hand: Of course I hate that stupid virus, what kind of dumb question is that?! Not only did it cancel the Seattle Dragons' season, but it also created an entire army of germaphobes and hydrochrondiacs! That's why I loved it down in Belarus, where I don't have to see any of those posers. I shudder to think what it would be like, meeting one of those people in real life; I bet they think of door-dash people as demigods!
"Master Hand, chill out, they're both asymptomatic!" Sonic said to the giant hand, who was too consumed by his own paranoia to hear the hedgehog out. "They're not gonna hurt you..."
"Lies, all of it is LIES!" screamed Master Hand, breathing heavily as Piranha Plant and Petey Piranha crept a bit closer to the giant hand. "Where is Isabelle when I need her..."
Isabelle was stuck in a rock and a hard place, for she and Tom Nook, just like Mario, were trapped inside an indestructible bubble. Isabelle and Tom Nook were with Mario, all of them trapped, as Brio and Cranky were plotting their next course of action in the comfort of the meeting room.
"They got you too, didn't they?" Tom Nook asked Mario, who nodded his head as his bubble was making him feel awfully claustrophobic. "Sad that it had to come to this..."
"What has gotten into Dr. Brio?" Mario asked Tom Nook and Isabelle, while keeping his voice low so that neither Brio nor Cranky could hear. "Why is he doing this-a for?"
"Well he did say that he despised being in Cortex's shadow all the time..." replied Isabelle, as Mario understood where Brio was coming from. Even if "he didn't agree with his course of action. "...I think he let it all go to his head."
"Speaking of Brio, he confirmed that Cortex had screwed over all the eliminated male candidates," Tom Nook told Mario, who wasn't too surprised by the revelation. "He played dirty the whole time, just so he could be man of the mansion."
"So Dr. Cortex was the dirtiest-a player in the game..." remarked Mario, not expecting anything less from Cortex considering that he was an evil genius and all. "...Master Hand will-a know what to do with him."
"Actually, we took care of him ourselves...we kicked him out of the mansion temporarily. And we kicked Pit out as well, since he helped Cortex at times. And Uka...we figured that Cortex needed somebody to keep him alive."
"This is the buddy cops, open up!" Toon Link shouted from behind the meeting room door, knocking on the door aggressively. Grumbling, Brio opened the door, as Toon Link and Young Link rushed inside.
"Can't you see that Cranky and I are busy?" Brio asked the buddy cops, who saw Mario and the search committee trapped inside their bubbles. Brio took notice of this, and tried to divert the buddy cops' attention. "Pay no attention to the three in the back...they're, um..."
"They're infected!" Cranky answered for Brio, who nodded his head affirmingly as the buddy cops were slightly convinced. "We have to keep them inside a bubble, so they won't spread the illness around."
"Yes, an illness that I invented...I didn't infect those three on purpose, mind you. You could say that it was...more of an accident."
"LIAR!" Mario shouted at Brio, who waved off the plumber and rolled his eyes. Brio was certainly gonna get his real soon.
"Insanity is one of the illness' main symptoms - as just demonstrated by Mario. I'd suggest keeping your distance away from him, even after he's healed..."
Cappy: So apparently I have two objectives, on my agenda - rescue Mario from the clutches of Dr. Brio, and help Waluigi gain Crazy Hand's respect. As of now, I haven't considered asking Spyro and Hunter if they want to be part of the rescue brigade... *turns around and sees Waluigi and Ryo bickering with one another in the background* Why do I even...well, it's a good thing Mario's house guests come in handy when you need 'em to...
"Have you seen Dr. Cortex anywhere?" Young Link asked Brio and Cranky, as the buddy cops had some unfinished business to take care of. "We plan on banning him from the mansion; we wanted to tell Master Hand about it, but he was too busy 'resting'..."
"No worries, you two - the search committee took care of him," Brio informed the buddy cops, who both let out collective sighs of relief. "His ban is only temporary, but justice came swift!"
"But not swift enough...his ban should be permanent!" exclaimed Toon Link, as he smacked his fist in the palm of his hand. "Drug dealers such as Cortex deserve to rot forever."
"Yes, I'm certain he does...you two run along now, keep doing your buddy cop thing. Cranky and I cannot afford any interruptions! Oh, but before you go...I need you to tell Master Hand a few things, on my behalf."
"This is terrible...he's really trying to run-a the mansion!" fretted Mario, as Brio was passing on some information to the buddy cops. "If he gets in touch-a with Master Hand, who knows-a what he'll do next!"
"Don't know about you two, but I sure wish Cortex was here to put Brio in check..." Tom Nook said to Mario and Isabelle; speaking of whom, why don't we see what the evil genius was up to?
After Pit left him, Cortex had no choice but to tag along with Uka, while he toiled away outside of the mansion. The evil genius was left to wander around Seattle, and soon he settled down at a bus stop, sitting on a bench.
"Where did it all go wrong, Uka?" Cortex asked the floating mask, taking the time to reflect on the past choices he had made. "When did everything go downhill for me?"
"Probably from the very moment you were born," replied Uka, who noticed how pleasant things were with no Pit around. "Wait, are we talking short-term, or long-term?"
"All I wanted was to be a leader again, to have just a little authority! Sure I got Lloyd injured, made almost everyone hate Itsuki, and got Tom Nook in trouble...but what else was I supposed to do?"
"Do nothing and admit that you would never achieve much in life? That's what I would've done, if I were a crapsack guy like you."
"What's worse, is what Tiki would think of me. What if she saw the footage, and thought less of me as a person? Her trust in me would be shattered!"
"Ha! You honestly believe that, Cortex? I still can't believe that woman has the gall to even speak with you. I bet someone is paying her."
"Oh, shut up, you! You just don't see Tiki the same way that I do. But, I shouldn't expect less from a mask who can't even love someone back!"
"That dumb pet goose of yours probably doesn't love you back..." Uka's remark struck a chord in Cortex, who suddenly remembered his goose companion. "Cortex, are you doing that thousand mile stare again?"
"Oh no...my goose! Why, I've spent so much time with my campaign, that I barely even spent any quality time with him! I'm such a horrible pet owner..."
"And that is a problem because...?" His confidence restored, Cortex stood up and turned on his hoverboots, now floating in the air. "Cortex, I think you're blowing this out of proportion."
"No, Uka! My pet goose is still at the mansion, left sick wondering where I am! I must head back, and ensure that my bird companion is safe and sound!"
"Is it really worth the effort, though?" To Cortex it was, as the evil genius flew away on his hoverboots. Uka sighed. "Knew I should've gone with Pit..."
Pit was meandering around Seattle, unsure of what to do. The angel wasn't allowed back at the mansion, and had nothing to bid his time with. All the while, he was greatly upset with Cortex.
"Never should've trusted Dr. Cortex, from the very beginning..." frowned Pit, feeling very cynical towards Cortex which each passing second. "...that dude isn't a fighter, he's a cheater! And cheaters never win!"
"Pit? Is that you? Whatcha doin' out here, ya bloke?" someone with an Australian accent asked the angel, who looked up and and saw Dingodile coming towards him. With Dingodile were the Komodo Bros, and Tiny Tiger.
"Oh, uh...howdy guys!" Pit didn't expect to see a few of Cortex's minions, which made for an awkward response from the angel. "What are you guys doing in Seattle?"
"I decided to stay around, and try and open up a diner. But thanks to Tiny, my diner got shut down...so we're stuck, at the moment."
"Tiny didn't do anything," stated Tiny, refusing to believe that he was guilty as he folded his arms.
Tiny: Tiny had to use bathroom really bad, so Tiny peed on customer's fries. Fries had salt just like Tiny's pee, so what's the big deal?...Tiny has kidney problems...?
"That's not the only reason why we're here," Komodo Joe said to Pit, while Tiny continued to remain defiant. "After Cortex lost his candidacy or whatever, Brio told us four to stay around, for the 'takeover'."
"Takeover? Is there professional wrestling involved?" asked Pit, getting all excited for no reason as he clapped his hands together.
"No, you doofus...Dr. Brio wants to take over the mansion," replied Komodo Moe, as Pit's unwarranted excitement quickly died down. "Apparently he wants the mansion all for himself!"
"Brio wants to take over the mansion...you know, that could be why he ratted Cortex out like that. Just to kick him out so he wouldn't get in his way!"
"Cortex got ratted out by Brio?" Dingodile raised an eyebrow, finding Brio's intentions to be rather fishy. "He mentioned something along the lines of that when he was going over his secret plan!"
"Hold up, so Brio getting me and Cortex kicked out was planned? Dang, how did I not see Brio planning stuff sooner?!"
"Probably because you're an idiotic buffoon...what are you doing now, kid?" Dingodile watched as Pit furiously took out his cellphone, texting up a storm.
"I'm gonna do whatever I can to undo the mess that Brio created. I won't let him get away with this!"
"Tiny spots Dr. Cortex in the air!" alerted Tiny, pointing up at the sky and seeing Cortex flying through the air on his hoverboots. "Tiny wishes he could fly..."
"He needs to know about Brio's plan as soon as possible. Let's follow him!"
Falco was in the lounge with X, Fuuka, and Roy, discussing the situation regarding Tom Nook and Isabelle. As the avian pilot listened on, he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket.
"Brio and Cranky could be anywhere inside this mansion," said X, as Falco took out his phone and saw that he received a text notification. "We can't waste any time, especially with...Falco, can you please put your phone down?"
"Shut up, mom...I'm checking this text message," Falco responded, as he was reading a text message from Pit. "It's some mass text...huh, Pit said that Link and Cloud are trapped inside the Empty Room. Anyone know what that is?"
"This is the first time hearing of such a thing," replied Fuuka, as Altair darted past the lounge. "What even is this Empty Room?" Seconds later, Altair rushed inside the lounge, after Fuuka piqued his interest.
"Someone said...Empty Room?" asked Altair, who had his eyes set upon derailing Pit's plans. Even though the assassin was late. "I can show you where it is, if you like..."
Zelda and Mitsuru were still hanging out with one another, sharing some friendly time together before the big announcement. As the two were heading down the hallway, Mitsuru received a text notification.
"Oh no...I just got a text message from Pit," stated Mitsuru as she checked her phone, immediately fearing for the worst. "Should I open it?"
"I wouldn't do it - save yourself some IQ points," replied Zelda, but Mitsuru opened up the text message anyways. "Well, what does it say?"
"'Dr. Brio is up to no good, and is trying to take over the mansion - please warn Master Hand,'" Mitsuru read the text message in full, unsure of what to make if of it. "Is he even telling the truth?"
"Yes, Master Hand - Dr. Cortex has been banned from the mansion, for life," Toon Link was heard down the hallway, with the door to Master Hand's room wide open. Curious, Zelda and Mitsuru went to Master Hand's room, and saw the buddy cops speaking with Master Hand.
"All because he wanted to deal some drugs, eh?" said Master Hand, as Zelda and Mitsuru watched the conversation from the bedroom door. "I'm glad that you boys gave Cortex what he rightfully deserved."
"It was the search committee's doing; they also banned Pit, for being an accomplice," stated Young Link, as Zelda and Mitsuru exchanged astonished looks with one another. "Moreover, Link and Cloud were both disqualified..."
"Disqualified?! From being candidates?!" Master Hand shouted out of disbelief, and Zelda and Mitsuru were in just as much disbelief, if not more. "But I was pulling for either one of them to be man of the mansion! No bias, of course."
"The reason for their disqualification hasn't been disclosed, but Link and Cloud sadly had to be banned from the mansion as well. Thankfully, they didn't get a permanent ban like Cortex and Pit."
"This doesn't add up..." Zelda discussed with Mitsuru, as she and the young lady pulled away from the bedroom door. "...Link and Cloud were supposed to play some 'hide-and-seek' game with Pit, right? So how would they be banned?"
"Not only that, but Pit was supposedly banned too, and even sent out a warning about Brio," replied Mitsuru, stroked her chin while putting all the puzzle pieces together. "Perhaps Brio really is up to no good..."
Samus was in the computer room, handling her business online. Most of which was just online shopping. Minato came inside the room, unsurprised that many of the computers were available (as it usually was).
Minato: No, my own little investigation hasn't come to an end...yet. Still on the hunt for the culprit. The answer I'm looking for might be in the mansion's security footage - it's probably the best (and only) option that I have.
"Ah, how convenient..." remarked Minato, seeing that the computer X and Fuuka were using in the last episode was open. The young man took a seat, grateful that he didn't have to type in a password to unlock anything. "...was Fuuka in here, Samus?"
"How am I supposed to know..." grumbled Samus, staring blankly at the computer monitor as she scrolled down on the web page. Leaving Samus alone, Minato moved the mouse around, looking for a place to start.
"Where to begin, where to begin..." Minato opened up the computer's file explorer, and saw a USB flash drive port. "...why not start here?" Minato then clicked on the USB icon, waiting to see what he could find...
Mario, Tom Nook, and Isabelle felt hopeless, as they were still trapped inside their bubbles. Meanwhile, Brio had gone over his diabolical plan with Cranky.
"And so, after Master Hand is destroyed, I shall have the mansion all for myself!" Brio said to Cranky before laughing evilly, while Mario and the search committee helplessly looked on. "You can be my right-hand man, if you wish."
"Then we find the author, kill him, and rewrite this entire story, right?" asked Cranky, who had a score to settle with this author person. He wouldn't stop until the author was no more.
"...yes, we'll get to that, but only in due time. We must go now; I told Toon Link and Young Link to make sure Master Hand remains in his room, so let's hope that they did what they were told..."
"Dr. Brio, Cranky, get back here!" Mario shouted at the two, who left the meeting room and closed the door. Mario sighed, as he sat back in his bubble. "Guess Master Hand's getting destroyed now..."
"Mario, can't you call Peach, and have Spyro and Hunter rescue us?" Isabelle asked Mario; she had more faith in Spyro getting the job done, than Hunter. Hunter should just come along, only to provide moral support.
"I would, but my phone-a died while I was decorating the mansion. Hehe. Tom Nook, why don't-a you call Peach?"
"Good thinking, Mario!" replied Tom Nook, as he took out his cellphone and dialed Peach's number. A number that was scarcely used, since Peach rarely used phone calls. "Thankfully I have Peach in my contact list..."
Before Tom Nook could make the call, the door to the meeting room was rammed down, by Spyro. Spyro ran inside the room, followed by Hunter, Ryo, and most importantly, Waluigi.
"Mario, you're just in luck, buddy!" exclaimed Waluigi, striking a pose for Mario who was all smiles. "For the Wah-Man has come to rescue..."
"Cappy, you found-a me!" gleamed Mario as Cappy came over to Mario, while Waluigi pouted after being ignored. "Such a fine-a companion you are..."
"It wasn't that hard - all I had to do was follow your scent," Cappy said to to Mario, who felt offended for all the wrong reasons. "I can assure you I wasn't talking about your body odor!"
Cappy: I've ridden atop Mario's head for so long, that I know what Mario's scent is like. It smells like sewer water, mixed with some pepperoni. Maybe even some mustache oil, here and there. Can you smell mustache oil? I sure hope so...
"Mario, you need to stop getting yourselves in these kind of situations, man," Spyro said to the plumber, expecting him to be more vigilant. "Look, I don't mind saving people, but come on..."
"We waited until the coast was clear, after Brio and Cranky took the elevator," Ryo said to Mario and the search committee. "Hopefully we didn't keep you all waiting."
"Ah, perfect timing - I was just about to call Peach, and have you boys over here," Tom Nook said to Spyro and Hunter, as he put his phone away. "Now why don't you free us from our little prison?"
"No, Spyro and Hunter...step aside," Waluigi told the dragon and cheetah, approaching Mario and the search committee as he flexed his fingers. "You're only here to be witnesses of my greatness!"
"His sarcasm mode is on point..." Hunter murmured to Spyro, who watched as Waluigi dug into his pocket...and pulled out a can of cheese whiz. Took it out looking all heroic.
"Seriously, Waluigi, a can of cheese whiz?" Ryo frowned at the lanky man, as Waluigi squirted cheese whiz on the bubbles encasing Mario, Tom Nook, and Isabelle. "How is cheese whiz supposed to..."
Suddenly, the three bubbles got bigger as they grew in size, and then after a few seconds...the bubbles popped! Mario, Tom Nook, and Isabelle were fried from their prisons, as they landed on the floor with a thud.
"Wow, Waluigi, you somehow managed to free them!" Spyro marveled at the lanky man, as Mario and company picked themselves up off the floor. "How did you even know that the cheese whiz would burst those bubbles?"
"Actually I didn't know, I totally guessed," confessed Waluigi, who was surprised himself as he put his can of cheese whiz away. "But I'll take it!"
"Much obliged, Waluigi!" Mario thanked the lanky man as he gleefully shook his hand. Waluigi saw himself as getting one step closer to proving his worth to Crazy Hand. "Now, to deal with that Brio..."
Link and Cloud remained inside the Empty Room, and it felt almost like an eternity in there. For the most part, it was quiet inside the room, although there were some loud sounds heard from outside.
"You know, Cloud, I've been thinking...have we been overlooked?" Link asked the swordsman, who took the time to think over the question and understand where Link was coming from.
"Overlooked, how? Not by the residents, I assume - everyone keeps giving us props, even if we don't deserve it."
"I feel like we've been overlooked...compared to Dr. Cortex. I mean, that guy was a glory hog, hogging all the attention with his stupid campaign...while we were just doing our own normal thing."
"You have a point there, Link. Cortex was going a bit overboard. I suspect that Brio had something to do with it."
"Yeah, maybe so. But I hope that Cortex learns his lesson. Personally, I'm just happy that his campaign finally came to an end."
"Many people already know that either one of us would get the job, I guess that's why you feel that we've been overlooked. Not that there's anything wrong with that..."
Suddenly the door to the Empty Room swung wide open, as torn caution tape fell to the floor. Falco stood at the doorway, armed with Anna's sword, with Altair right behind him.
"Heh heh...I look awesome with this sword, don't I?" Falco asked Link and Cloud, as he held Anna's sword over his back and poked Altair in the face. Altair winced in pain, as he grabbed his forehead. "Stop it, Altair, you're making me look bad..."
Falco: The others are too scared to admit it, but I looked pretty cool cutting down that caution tape with Anna's sword. And I freed Link and Cloud, too? That's the icing on the pie right there! Or is it cake?
Lucario: Kind of wished that caution tape on the Empty Room door stayed there forever. Just passing by that room gives me a lot of bad memories... *shudders*
"Ah...freedom," Link sighed happily, as he and Cloud exited the Empty Room; Cloud immediately closed the door. "Feels like I just stepped out from a black hole..."
"Took us long enough to finally get out," remarked Cloud, as he stretched his arms out before looking towards Altair. "Thanks for freeing us, Altair."
"Don't thank me...thank the bird," replied Altair, as he brought Link and Cloud's attention to Falco. Falco posed with Anna's sword, showing how awesome he looked while wielding it. "Don't ask me where he got the sword from..."
"Altair's right, that question is irrelevant," said Falco, eliminating any possibility of finding himself in trouble with Anna. "What is relevant, though, is how much of a hero I was, saving you guys!"
"Trust me, Falco - there's more to being a hero than just using some sword," Link offered these words of advice to the avian pilot, before turning his attention towards Cloud and smiling. "Learned that from a good friend of mine..."
"Link's right - and now would be a good time to give that sword back to its rightful owner," Roy suggested to Falco, as he tried to grab the sword from the avian pilot. But Falco refused to let go, resulting in a tug-of-war between Roy and Falco over the sword.
"Really, you two?" Cloud said to Roy and Falco, as he and Link had no choice but to break up the tug-of-war battle. Meanwhile, Fuuka's phone rang, and the bluenette answered right away.
"Hello? Hi Minato," Fuuka spoke into the phone, initially cheery at first, before sporting a more serious visage. "Really? Yes, he's here...I will let him know." Fuuka put her phone down, as she glanced at X. "Minato wants us at the computer room."
"Then to the computer room, we shall go," replied X, before Fuuka returned to her phone call with Minato. "Thanks for the assistance, Altair." Altair nodded his head, darting down the hallway as X and Fuuka made their leave.
Anna remained at Fox and Krystal's house, as she was to stay away from Master Hand as much as possible. The merchant had moved on from the guest room, and was now in the laundry area.
"Has she ever operated a washing machine before?" Krystal asked Fox, watching as Anna marveled at a washing machine...a washing machine suitcase, to be precise. Truly an appliance of the future.
"Cut her some slack - not that often you can use your suitcase to wash your clothes," replied Fox, as Anna watched the clothes toss around in the washing machine suitcase contraption. "As long as she doesn't break it..."
Some loud screaming was heard, and seconds later, Cortex came crashing down through the roof to Fox and Krystal's home. The evil genius landed on the floor with a thud, only inches away from the washing machine suitcase.
"Nice one, Cortex...you missed the mansion!" Uka frowned at the evil genius, floating down through the hole in the ceiling Cortex had made. "You've always had terrible aim..."
"I'm in the vicinity of the mansion, so that's good enough for me..." responded Cortex as he stood up, before noticing Fox glaring at him. "...why are you looking at me like that? Is my face that ugly?"
"Dr. Cortex, you were THIS close to breaking my washing machine," Fox scolded the evil genius, before pointing at the washing machine suitcase. "That thing is a luxury!"
"Oh please, it looks like hot garbage..." Certainly wasn't hot garbage to Anna, who still found herself amazed by the appliance. "...but I guess every piece of garbage has its own merit."
Cortex: Evil washing machine suitcase...that sounds like an excellent idea! Just gotta cut out the "suitcase" part.
"Now, I'm not sure if you all are aware, but I've been banned from the mansion," Cortex said to Fox, Krystal, and Anna, making sure that his ray gun was loaded up and ready to go. "However, I came back, only for my pet goose!"
"Yeah, we know about your ban - Falco told us," replied Fox, leaving Cortex surprised at how fast word of his ban spread around. "Called us and let us know. He also said that your VP, Brio, was up to no good..."
"Apparently he and Cranky Kong kidnapped Tom Nook and Isabelle, for reasons unknown," added Krystal. "Right after you got banned..."
"Ha! Knew that Brio would do his own thing, after he turned on you," Uka said to Cortex, now expecting the evil genius to pay up and owe him some money. "You were too blinded by his 'trust' do see it!"
"I was blinded...but now, I have seen the light," acknowledged Cortex, knowing what he had to do. "If he got me kicked out of the mansion just so he could carry out his plan without my interference, then he's got another thing coming for him!"
Rather than go along with Mario and the others, Tom Nook and Isabelle went to the cafe, to discuss important matters. Namely, the decision between Link and Cloud. During the whole decision-making, Tom Nook got a call, from Fuuka.
"Yes, Tom Nook speaking..." Tom Nook answered the phone. "You want me and Isabelle in the computer room, Fuuka? For what?" Tom Nook's eyes went wide, which could only mean one thing. "Oh dear...we're be there shortly."
Pit, Dingodile, Tiny, and the Komodo Bros had followed Cortex to the mansion, and were at the mansion premises. They went to the front door of the mansion, which was guarded by Copper and Booker.
"Stop it right there!" shouted Copper, putting his hand out as Pit and company came to a stop. "Tiger guy, Komodo dragons, dingo...crocodile thing, you are free to enter!"
"Well boys, we're in!" shouted Pit, as Copper and Booker opened the door and Cortex's minions entered the mansion. Pit tried to enter, but was pushed away. "Hey, what gives?"
"Where you born yesterday, Pit?" Apparently, Pit thought long and hard about the answer to that question. "You're banned from the mansion!"
"I know, but Dr. Brio is up to no good! He got me and Cortex kicked out on purpose, just so he could..."
"I don't want to hear it! I'm sure you're just making that up anyways. I know better than to believe in your tall tales!"
"BACK AWAY FROM-A THE HAND, DOCTOR BRIO!" Mario was heard shouting from inside the mansion. "Not a sudden move..."
"Welp, duty calls..." said Booker, assuming that Master Hand was in trouble as he and Copper entered the mansion. Pit followed after the canine duo...
...and followed them to Master Hand's room, where they saw Master Hand lying on the floor. Brio had his ray gun pointed at the giant hand, as he glared down Mario, Spyro, Hunter, Waluigi, Ryo who were all behind him. Cranky was standing by.
"Mario, what is..." Copper asked the plumber, seeing the downed Master Hand and gasping out of shock. "...egad! Master Hand!"
"You're too late!" Brio said to Copper and Booker, his finger on the trigger. "In a matter of seconds, this mansion will be mine for the taking!"
"Dr. Brio here wants-a to destroy Master Hand, and take full control of the mansion," Mario explained the situation to Copper and Booker, making sure that Brio didn't pull anything funny. "He used-a his ray gun to render Master Hand unconscious!"
"Wouldn't destroying Master Hand destroy the whole Smash universe?" inquired Booker, thinking long and hard for no reason. "Or am I thinking about this too much?"
"I can assure you, that this universe that I invented will remain intact," Brio assured Booker, as Master Hand was left moaning in pain. "But Master Hand will be gone, and with him gone, nobody will challenge me!"
"Why are you doing this, Dr. Brio?" Waluigi asked the genius, desiring to know what his true intentions were. "Are you that desperate for power?"
"Of course I am, you ignorant ninny! Do you know how long I had to suffer, being in the shadow of Cortex? Watching him take all the credit, while I'm left ignored by everyone! I've waited for my chance to spite Cortex, and earn a shot at achieving the power he craved for! That's why I took the VP job - to find my way inside the mansion, and became the mansion's top alpha!"
"Silence, Dr. Brio...I have heard enough."
Mario and company moved out of the way, to the side, as Brio gasped when he saw the person standing at Master Hand's bedroom door...Dr. Cortex. (With Uka, of course).
"Dr. Cortex, you made it back!" exclaimed Pit, his distrust in the evil genius having gone away. "About what I said earlier..."
"Save the apologies for later, Pit," Cortex told the angel, before focusing all his attention on Brio. "Brio and I have a score to settle..."
"Hey Cortex, don't forget about us, too!" said Link, as he and Cloud entered Master Hand's room, along with Roy and Falco. "You're going down, Brio..."
Link: Ran into Tom Nook and Isabelle...told us how Brio held them captive, and how the guy wanted to destroy Master Hand and take the mansion all for himself. Sadly this could've been prevented, but I should've known something was up when Brio overstayed his welcome...
Brio found himself outnumbered, backing away as Cortex and company walked closer to the genius. Cranky also backed away, as the others were getting too close for comfort.
"I'd say we drop this whole mansion takeover stuff," Cranky suggested to Brio, who found himself cornered with no room for escape. "Focus on taking out the author instead."
"No! I won't let Cortex and these peons squander my opportunity!" vowed Brio, not ready to throw in the towel. "My one and only chance at ruling the Smash Mansion, that I invented...I won't let it go to waste!"
"Master Hand? Master Hand!" shouted X, as he and Fuuka showed up at Master Hand's room along with the search committee. Fuuka brought her laptop. "We need you to see something!"
"Master Hand can't hear you right now!" Brio shouted at X, about to pull the trigger on Master Hand at any minute. "He won't ever hear you again, once I'm through with him!"
"That guy really has gone crazy..." Left wondering what to do, X saw Tom Nook taking out his cellphone. "...Tom Nook, why are you making a phone call at a time like this?"
"The day still has yet to be saved..." replied Tom Nook before walking away, with X looking exasperatedly at Isabelle who shrugged her shoulders. "...why hello, Mr. McCloud."
"I can't believe you, Brio..." Cortex seethed at his best friend, who had an evil smirk on his face. "...you only accepted the VP job just so you could do this, didn't you?"
"Should've known better than to trust me, Dr. Cortex!" Brio taunted the evil genius, hoping that Cortex knew how foolish he felt. "I betrayed you once before - there was always a chance I would do it again!"
"But what about my campaign? The speech, the merchandise, and even that brainwashing song! You were there all the way..."
"I only did those things to make it seem like I had your trust. And I played you like a fool! All the work I've done, it has led up to this..." Brio had his ray gun closer to Master Hand, who was still unconscious.
"Dr. Brio, don't!" Mario shouted as he put his hand out, but Brio had made up his mind. Master Hand was only seconds away from being destroyed.
"Say goodbye to Master Hand, filthy peons that I invented! And say hello to your new supreme leader, the man who'll take this mansion to great heights..."
"Ooooohhhh Master Hand! Guess who returned to the mansion to say hi? Your favorite merchant!"
A mere second away from blasting Master Hand out of existence, Brio found himself interrupted when Anna entered the room. Tom Nook stood by, standing proud with his arms folded.
"I'M UP, I'M UP!" shouted Master Hand, waking out of his state of unconsciousness. Much to Brio's great chagrin. "Augh, that awful scent is back again..."
"Oh, you couldn't be talking about me, are you?" asked Anna, with a sly smile, as Master Hand seethed at the very sight of the merchant. "How could such a scent be coming from sweet little me?"
"ANNA! I knew you were lingering around inside my mansion. Felt that scent all over the place. What business do you have meandering around, woman?!"
"You can worry about Anna later, Master Hand," Fuuka told the giant hand, coming forth with her laptop. "There's something that we need to show you - something that Minato found."
"Do not be fooled, Master Hand - she has nothing to show!" Brio blurted out, sounding very nervous. "She has nothing to show..."
"And why should I believe you, Dr. Brio? I bet you were the one who knocked me out! Why else are you holding that ray gun?"
"I was just...testing it out, hehe." Brio looked even more nervous, holding his ray gun behind his back. "But Fuuka is still lying..."
"Dr. Brio? What are you doing in my room? And what's with that rag...mmph!"
That line came from Lloyd, but more specifically, it came from Fuuka's laptop...which played footage of Brio applying a chloroform rag to Lloyd. Fuuka then pressed the fast-forward button, showing footage of Brio wrapping a sleeping Lloyd in toilet paper.
"Hey, I remember it now!" exclaimed Pit, as there was now footage playing of Brio tying Lloyd to the lounge ceiling. "Brio told me and Cortex how he found Lloyd hanging from the ceiling. Told Cortex to use Lloyd as a ploy to get one of the male candidates eliminated."
"Ah, yes, I remember..." remarked Cortex as he stroked his chin, while Brio was nervously biting his fingernails. "...he was the one who put me up to it!"
"That's...not true..." said Brio, as Fuuka was now showing footage of Brio handing Cortex some cash - the same amount of cash that Cortex gave to Face McShooty for 'taking care' of Samus.
"Brio told Cortex to pay someone to get Samus in trouble, so that she wouldn't catch on to what they were doing! It's all coming back to me now..."
"Still not true..." Now there was footage of Brio gathering a bunch of electronic organizers, and bringing them to Cortex.
"Yeah, Brio stole the electronic organizers Itsuki bought, and ordered Cortex to mess them all up. Luckily I got a non-effective one..."
Fuuka played through the footage, showing Brio in a negative light. Whether it was hiding the stolen $3,000 underneath Minato's pillow, telling Cortex to tell Bowser to screw over Lucina, or mentioning the tower mortgage to Cortex...Brio did all of those things, and everyone in Master Hand's room got to see it for themselves.
"Here comes the best part..." said Fuuka, as there was footage of Brio sneaking inside Cortex's room...carrying packs of cigars and some money. Cortex's face sank when he saw this.
"Those buddy cops seem to think that Cortex is a drug dealer, eh?" Brio was heard in the footage, before stashing the packs of cigars and money in the drawer of Cortex's dresser. "This should take care of Cortex...given his history with those boys."
"You were the one who had he FRAMED?!" Cortex boomed at Brio, who was left even more nervous than before as he felt Cortex's fury. "You were the one responsible for my elimination?!"
"It's nothing personal..." Brio said to Cortex, who was angrily marching forward as Brio backed away. Brio backed up into Master Hand, gulping nervously as he turned around.
"So, you had the audacity to mess around with the male candidates...and the female candidates, too..." Master Hand growled at Brio, making the genius shiver in pure, unadulterated fear. "...couldn't let Cortex play fair and square!"
"I only did it for my benefit, mind you..." confessed Brio, fearful of what Master Hand could potentially do to him. "...I did not care for Cortex and his ambitions, no matter how hard I...OOF!"
Brio shrieked in pain, as the genius was lifted up off his feet. He fell to the floor moments later, grabbing his nether regions, as Cranky Kong stood behind him with his cane.
"Hehehe...serves him right," snickered Cranky, who had used his cane to strike Brio between the legs. "This weirdo really thought we were working together! Maybe that'll teach him a lesson in trust."
Cranky Kong: All I ever wanted was to get closer to the author, and give him a piece of my mind. And although I'm an old monkey, I'm still wise enough to know when someone's pulling my tail. Brio might've reeled me in, and use me to his advantage, but this whole time I was one step ahead! Ha ha!
Minato: Turns out that Brio put the security footage that showed him doing all that bad stuff...on this flash drive. *holds up flash drive* His fatal mistake was forgetting to take it out.
"I may be down...but I am not out..." said Brio, struggling to stand up on his feet as he could only crawl on the floor. The genius looked up, and saw Link towering over him. "...what are you going to do, stab me with your sword?"
"Fortunately for you, I won't be needing my Master Sword..." Link said to Brio, who let out a sigh of relief. "...but that won't mean I won't go easy on you."
No sword, no problem for Link...
"...and stay out!" shouted Link, as he tossed Brio out of the mansion through the front door, watching as the genius landed on the ground. Even though he was out of the mansion, Brio remained undeterred.
"You really think tossing me out will stop me?" Brio questioned Link, as he found the strength to stand on his own two feet. "I can always come back..."
"GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!" screamed Waluigi, running out of the mansion like a banshee as he swung wildly with Anna's sword. Brio screamed as he ran away, with Waluigi chasing after him. "Stay away from the mansion, you hear?!"
"Is that my sword?" inquired Anna, poking her out of the front door and seeing Waluigi with her sword. "How did he..."
"Bruh, he stole my sword, that's messed up!" pouted Falco, who was standing at the front door watching Waluigi. The avian pilot then saw Anna glaring at him. "Uh, I mean...your sword, which I totally didn't want for myself."
"Anna...we need to talk," Master Hand said to the merchant, who turned around and faced the giant hand. "That scent of yours, it was all over this mansion...have you been staying here?"
"Yep! Stayed her since late March, before Fox and Krystal's wedding," Anna happily answered, as Master Hand felt like having a heart attack. "It was Link and Cloud who suggested that I live at the mansion, after my shop..."
"How could they?! Can't believe they let an evil capitalist like you live under my roof. Where are their morals?"
"But it's all good; I got to run my shop at the front of the mansion. You saw my cute little shop stand?"
"That was YOUR shop stand? You were doing business on MY mansion premises?! You rotten lady..."
Isabelle: To no one's surprise, Master Hand still dislikes Anna. But after hearing about how the residents got along with Anna, his disdain has gone down. But only by a tad. Anna won't be staying in the mansion, as expected, but Master Hand said he's open to letting Anna operate her shop on mansion grounds...while only selling Master Hand-approved products. I'd say it was a good compromise.
Cortex: After thoughtful consideration...I've decided to step away from the mansion. Now, now, don't cry, I know you'll miss me...I feel responsible for bringing Brio over, and seeing the things he's done, that responsibility is heavy on my shoulders. I shall atone for my mistake, and ban myself from the mansion. The residents might not miss me as much, but...
Goose: HONK HONK! *runs up to Cortex, who smiles and embraces him*
Cortex: My pet goose, you have returned! I'm sorry for ignoring you all these months...I was more concerned winning the favor of the others, then caring for you! But I shall make up for it...we'll spend lots of quality time together, just you and me!
Viridi: *sniffling* Pit said that he's serving some stupid "self-ban"...out of "solidarity" with Dr. Cortex...that stupid N head just messes everything up! *starts sobbing*
Crunch: *standing in the background, shaking his head* Girl, you got some serious issues...
Uka: Cortex said he wants to be left alone, so I'll leave him alone. I've taken one too many breaks from the guy many times before, so this alone time won't be anything new for me.
Dingodile: Me and the boys weren't that interested in helping Brio. Granted, he was the one who invented us, but we wanted no part of his takeover scheme. Truthfully, we only came to the mansion for the noodles.
Waluigi was at the tower, telling Crazy Hand about how he saved Mario. Would the lanky man's story change Crazy Hand's opinion?
"So what do you say, Crazy Hand?" Waluigi asked the giant hand, eager to hear his response. Serena was standing by, as Crazy Hand thought over what he was going to say.
"You know, I didn't see that much POTENTIAL in the five men Serena picked out..." replied Crazy Hand, as Waluigi was so excited that he might also wet himself. "...but you did save Mario...ah, screw it. Waluigi, I hereby name you the UNOFFICIAL man of the tower!"
"Aw yeah, the Wah-Man reigns...wait, unofficial man of the tower? What is that supposed to mean?"
"You got the job, okay? Now LEAVE me alone!" Crazy Hand vanished, after his work was done. Serena walked up to Waluigi, giving him a smile.
"Looks like you got what you wanted," the Keeper said to Waluigi, who was salty at first but felt better afterwards. "Congrats, Waluigi."
"I may not be an official man of the tower yet, but I'll take what I can get," said Waluigi, doing his best to remain optimistic. "Might not have Crazy Hand's full respect as of yet, but nothing says I can stop now!"
Ryo: Waluigi is the unofficial man of the tower? Good for him, I guess. Sounds like a good opportunity for Waluigi. Might even change the opinion of Crazy Hand, and everyone else. We'll see.
With Brio promptly dealt with, it was time for the man and woman of the mansion to be named. Everyone was gathered in the lecture hall that night, with Mario, Link, Cloud, Zelda, and Mitsuru standing onstage with the search committee. Master Hand was hovering over them.
"Welcome everyone, to this historic occasion!" Master Hand greeted the crowd, as he couldn't wait to get things started. "Tonight, we are going to find out who the man, and woman, of the mansion shall be. I've entrusted the search committee, Tom Nook and Isabelle, to select the best candidate, and I know they haven't let me down."
"There have been some hiccups along the way, and some meddling...but we still got the job done," addressed Tom Nook, seeing how antsy Master Hand was; the giant hand couldn't even stay still. "Isabelle and I worked hard to find the right candidate, and we have made our final choice."
"Right! So without further ado...the woman of the mansion. You only had four ladies to observe, for about five months or so, so choosing between them couldn't have been that hard..."
"No, it wasn't...two of them were out of the running, even though they shouldn't have, but it is what is is. On one hand we have Princess Zelda...and on the other hand, Mitsuru Kirijo. I have you all know that Isabelle and I made our decision last week."
"Skip 'em, we all know they're both co-women of the mansion!" shouted Sonic, with Tails telling the blue hedgehog to pipe down. "Everyone knows!"
Sonic: What's so wrong with having two women of the mansion? Two heads are better than one. Are you telling me that Master Hand is too afraid to have a diarchy?
"Don't be fooled, there will be no 'co-women of the mansion'..." Tom Nook informed the crowd, as Sonic snapped his fingers in disgust. "...there will be only one woman of the mansion. And that woman of the mansion, will be...Princess Zelda."
Cheers and applause was heard all around the lecture hall, as Zelda stood at center stage and basked in the euphoria. Mario, Link, Cloud, and Mitsuru were clapping, all four happy for the princess.
"Do I have to give a speech?" Zelda asked Master Hand, who gave the princess a thumbs up. Zelda accepted the microphone from Tom Nook, ready to address the crowd. "Um, I won't say much, but..."
"PRINCESS ZELDA YOU ROCK!" cheered Lloyd, Zelda's roommate, as he pumped his fists in the air. He should be the leader of the Princess Zelda Fan Club.
"...thank you, Lloyd. Anyways, I would like to thank Master Hand, for the opportunity, and the search committee for choosing me as the woman of the mansion. I already have experience ruling over a kingdom, so this is nothing out of the ordinary for me. But I'll do my best to represent this mansion, and be a leader that everyone can look up to. Thank you."
Mitsuru: Had a feeling that Zelda would win the job, from the very beginning. I just wanted to give her a little competition. *smiles*
"Well said, Princess Zelda!" Tom Nook said to the princess, who gave the microphone back to the tanoki. "Now, the other moment you've all been waiting for - the man of the mansion! Link, and Cloud Strife."
"Full disclosure, I knew they would be the last men standing," confessed Master Hand, not even hiding his bias for the swordsmen in the slightest. "I know how to pick the right people..."
"We didn't need your unnecessary comments, Master Hand...anyways, the man of the mansion. Isabelle went from eight men down to two, and we have made our final decision."
"Drumrolll, do a drumroll!" Master Hand pleaded to the crowd, who just sat there and did nothing. "Don't just sit there - build up the suspense!"
"Not necessary...the man of the mansion, the man who will be the mansion's new alpha male, the top dog if you will, is...Link!"
Cheers and applause was heard once again, as the crowd was now cheering for Link. Link himself was surprised, looking like he had just won the lottery.
"You did it, man...congrats," Cloud congratulated Link, who was all smiles as he looked towards Zelda. Zelda was just as happy, if not more, for her wish had come true.
"You have the floor, Link..." Tom Nook said to the Hylian, as he handed him his microphone. Link was at a loss for words, as he accepted the mic from Nook.
"Um, uh, I don't know what to say..." Link addressed the crowd, smiling as he rubbed his hand over his face. "...I wasn't expecting this, honestly. I would say it feels like a dream come true, but..."
"Speech, give them a speech!" Master Hand enticed Link, greatly interested in what the Hylian had to say. "Since Zelda refused to do one..."
"No, Master Hand, I won't be giving a speech...instead, I want to do something different. My first duty, as man of the mansion...is to give up my new position to my good friend, Cloud Strife."
Everyone in the lecture hall gasped, left astonished by Link's big announcement. Link looked towards Cloud, who didn't know what to feel, as Zelda was left feeling very conflicted.
"Cloud Strife has done many great things, over the past couple of months," said Link, while Zelda tried her hardest to remain positive. "Whether it was doing a party bus, helping a mage find some magic..."
"He also helped me with my horror movie!" exclaimed Sonic, who found Cloud to be a surprisingly great narrator for his film.
"And he got Juneteenth recognized at the mansion as a holiday!" added Doc Louis, who now thought of Cloud as his soul brother. "It was originally his idea!"
"I still had something to do with it..." Link muttered underneath his breath, before continuing on. "...but the point is, Cloud has done many awesome things since Master Hand went away, and not only that, but he can tolerate all the usual mansion shenanigans much better than anyone else can."
"I have to admit, he's much-a better than me," Mario said to Zelda and Mitsuru, considering Cloud's tolerance of others to be a high mark of his.
"So for those reasons, and those reasons alone, Cloud deserves to be man of the mansion. What do you think, Master Hand?" Everyone had their attention focused on Master Hand, eager to hear the giant hand's consensus.
"I mean, I had no problem with either Link or Cloud, so I'm not complaining," replied Master Hand, suppressing his blatant favoritism for both swordsmen. "Then it is settled - Cloud is the new man of the mansion!"
The residents were cheering and applauding once more, as they were chanting Cloud's name. Mario would shake Cloud's hand, in a move that formally instituted Cloud as the mansion's new head honcho.
"Sorry that your little dream didn't come true..." Midna said to Zelda, hovering down to the princess while Cloud basked in all the euphoria taking place.
"No, it's fine; I had no problem with Cloud getting the job," smiled Zelda, who quickly got over Link not being the man of the mansion. "He was the only other person I was pulling for..."
Link: Did a pretty selfless thing tonight...I guess that's what heroes like me are supposed to do.
"Please give me a speech, we're dying for one..." Master Hand said to the swordsman, despite being the only one wanting a speech. He should know that Cloud was a man of few words.
"Hand over the mic..." Cloud said to Link, who handed the swordsman the microphone. Cloud faced the crowd, and said the following: "...let's mosey, everyone."
That got a huge pop out of the residents, as they were cheering and clapping at all sorts of things. Master Hand, who wanted a speech so bad, sighed heavily as Cloud had a very slight smile on his face.
The Cloud Strife era at the Smash Mansion has just begun...