So, over the years I have gotten a couple hate reviews (although they are rare, and I was super lucky with how nice everyone here is.) But these would all say the same thing "your story isn't good." Or "It's okay, but you're making some big writing mistakes-ect" And this would always make me laugh. Because while I worked really hard on this story, I want to set the record straight for my own pride as a writer- my goal was never to write a good story. It was just to have fun, and write whatever I wanted.
I would like to become a professional writer one day. So I am working on multiple novels that I hope to get published. I am very proud of these, and they have undergone years of writing, editing, rewriting, editing, editing, editing, and finally Beta read, until every single word in them has been deliberated on. Traditional publishing is a separate beast where not a sentence can just be, it all has to be building up to a meticulous plotline. Which is all fine and good when publishing is your goal. But fanfic is wonderful because you can play by your own rules.
All this to say, my only goal for this story is to have fun. This is why this story is waaaaay longer than it has any right being, or the fact I've been slipping song lyrics into the dialogue for no reason, or the spelling/grammar is so….so sad. So I truly mean it when I say I love hearing from you guys, and constructive criticism is welcome. That being said, I am probably already aware of the story's flaws, and unfortunately have no intention of fixing it because in the end I just want to have fun doing what I love- which is apparently writing a really dark/sad/disturbed story! (With a happy ending). So to all you lovely readers, let's get Luffy out of here!
XXX
When Ace was younger, he realized that he couldn't understand people. He still didn't. They were loud, obnoxious, mean-spirited, messy, violent things. For as long as he could remember he felt removed from the rest of them.
It may have been his doing. He knew what the world would do to him if they found out what he was. So, he was careful never to get close, never to be weak, never to let them see him.
It might have been their doing. With no family or friends, Ace had never felt the desire to try and reach out to anyone. They weren't worth the risk, and more than that, he never felt like he was missing out on humanity. When you don't have much to say to anybody, you become good at listening and watching. And from what he saw he didn't feel any kind of desire to try and 'bond' with them. The bandits were… interesting, at least when they weren't yelling at him for something or another, but they didn't want him, they had made that clear. He was a burden to them, like some kind of feral creature they had been blackmailed into watching. The men at the taverns in town were vile, drunk creatures, always quick to bloodshed, the nobles disgusting in their own right, and the grey terminal was full of either criminals or those in despair because of it.
This was humanity. A series of poor options, and conflicting greed. And from an early age Ace decided he wanted no part in it, he didn't even want to witness it.
It wasn't that he thought he was better, no, he knew that he was probably the worst of them all. But he did feel different. As if he wasn't quite human. He was part monster. At least that's what everyone said behind his back. So, he figured that it made sense he didn't fit in with the people.
If that was true. If he wasn't really human, then there was no reason to pretend. No reason to try and get along with them, and no reason to want to. So Ace just didn't bother.
One of the earliest lessons he had been taught by the bandits, by Garp, and by the harshness of the mountains, was that the strong survived, and the weak died. You couldn't rely on anyone to save you. The sick truth was the world just didn't care, not about you, not about your feelings, and certainly not about what was fair. Death wasn't a trial, it was death, cold, unfeeling, and uncaring.
Ace had seen some pretty horrible things happen to the people of Grey terminal. Deases, hunger, and theft ran rampant there and pain was as common as air. Some people found this hard to live with. Some found it too hard.
It never really bothered Ace as much as it did the rest of the world. It had taken him several years to understand why. Unlike the throngs of people who tried to desperately scrap by in the grey terminal, Ace was bound by absolutely nothing. Not in this world, nor the next. There wasn't a single person he had grown attached too. Even if he had wanted too (which he didn't) he wouldn't even know how to try, or if he was capable of it. Aside from a long dead mother who had shown him care, his parents and any relatives he may have had were strangers to him. It was even more than that though. Ace preferred it this way. He preferred having no attachments. It made it so much easier to survive. He never wanted to be like the pathetic people in the kingdom, so deeply and disgustingly entangled with each other. People who allow themselves to let someone in only to be betrayed. Or perhaps the worst of all, to entangle themselves with someone so completely that their survival seems to hinge on another person. So much so that when someone they love dearly dies, they feel themselves die alongside them.
Ace had heard the screams of the dying, and he had heard the screams of those who lose a loved one. They sound as if their own hearts are being pulled out of their chests. At first it disturbed him. But he had long since come to accept it. It was their mistake for weakness. It seemed to simple to him. They didn't have to feel that pain. They chose to love someone that much. They were all but setting themselves up for heartbreak. Honestly, why were people so stupid.
Life was so much easier when you only had yourself. Sure, Ace had never had someone to depend on. But that was just life. By now he knew how to look after himself. He knew he had what it took to survive here, and he would never have to know that pain of separation. No one would ever betray him, and no one would be able to reject him, or hold Rodger's name against him.
And even if the day came when he wasn't strong enough to protect himself, that would be alright too. Fine even. He would just be gone. No one would scream for him, no one would miss him. He would just be as he always was- alone.
He was untouchable.
At least until stupid Sabo had to come and mess it all up for him.
Or at least that's how Ace had seen it when he was a little boy. Sabo had been like that one nasty flu virus that Ace had absolutely no immunity against. He had wormed his way through all of Ace's defenses. It had been easier to see it like that. Certainly, at the time, with Ace's limited understanding of people.
Sabo had done it. He had ruined Ace's protection. And what's worse, he had made him… weird. Like weird, weird. So weird that even the bandits didn't seem so bad anymore. Weird enough that Garp trying to get Ace to call him grandpa no longer felt like a swear word. And weird enough that Ace had taken an interest even in the annoying crybaby that was stalking him.
It had been so much easier to blame Sabo. After all, it may have been his fault. But as much as Ace hated to admit it, it hadn't just been Sabo. Maybe Ace hadn't been as above it as he pretended to be. Something had been… off with him for a while. Something dark and ugly and unfathomable had been inside him since the moment he was born, and every single year it grew and grew until sometimes it was all Ace could feel. He had thought it was what made him a monster, what kept him away from other humans. Never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined that having it was what made him human.
When he had met Sabo he hadn't thought much of the other boy, aside from finding him weird. But something about how odd he was had piqued Ace's interest. Enough so that he had thought about him every now and then. The strange dirty, scrappy, polite, stupid, blond boy in the trash heap. When he had gotten the chance to talk to him again, he had. He thought that would be the end of it, but it had only made things worse. He found the kid even odder the second time. Certainly, like no one he had met before. What's worse was that Ace liked him. Like he liked another human person. When they were together Ace didn't feel that dark pit inside him. He felt like a whole person, a real one, not a monster. And the more time he spent with his first friend ever- Ace realized that maybe he had never been one at all. Maybe he had never been anything but human. What he was feeling this whole time was just aching never-ending loneliness.
It was easy to blame Sabo but the truth was, that void in Ace. It had been all-consuming. Like a black hole. And the larger it got, the more it took from him. His determination, his appetite, his strength, his purpose. Until he was left all hollow and wondering what the point of this was. What was the point of anything? He didn't care about himself; he didn't care about anything. So why. Why did he have to do all this? Because it just wasn't worth it.
It wasn't until a couple of months later when his friendship with the stupid blond boy was still new. The two of them were sitting around the fire, having successfully hunted a deer, and were gorging themselves on the spoils. Sabo had said something dumb that made Ace laugh, like really laugh. And all of a sudden, the world seemed to make sense to Ace. He wasn't hungry anymore. He was full, like truly full. This was why people did it. Something about this situation, or maybe about Sabo, had fed Ace in a way he hadn't realized he needed. And now he understood.
Luffy was even worse somehow. If Sabo was a virus, then Luffy was a superbug. And nothing about him made sense. At least Sabo had been economic. He could take care of himself, and Ace trusted his strength. Not only was he a friend, but he watched Ace's back and together they could take on bigger threats and reap more food. From a survival point of view, Lu was none of that. He was way more work than he was worth. He barely helped them hunt, and more often than not he would get eaten. He was annoying, useless, and not a mistake Ace could afford to make. So the fact that Ace actually liked having his annoying ass around came as a huge surprise to him. It was probably because Luffy liked him first. For whatever reason the younger boy was kind of obsessed with them. But the way he looked at Ace… with complete unfounded trust. Like Ace was the single lighthouse on a dark sea, like Ace could never do wrong, like Ace was this amazing perfect unfillable hero. It was disgusting and at first, it made him angry. Because… because what the actual hell was wrong with this kid? But after they got used to each other, Ace realized to his own dismay, that he kind of liked it. He didn't set out to be anyone's hero. He hadn't wanted to look out for anyone else. But here they were. And he liked stupid, dumb, idiotic Luffy.
He- him- the literal devil spawn wasn't immune to humanity. He had been desperate for it, and he had never even known. And now, even though every breath he took was an offense to the world, he someone as rotten as Ace had a family. They weren't blood, and Ace was no expert. But he couldn't imagine that really mattered. He hadn't meant to feel this way. He had never meant to care. But here they were. And all of a sudden Ace was no better than the weak pitiful people he had spent his childhood trying to understand. His heartbeat and bled the same as everyone else's. And there was more to fear from the world than he ever realized. What was worse was that Sabo and Luffy already seemed to understand this perfectly. Ace was the moron in this situation. Ace was the one who hadn't understood and had to play ten years of catch-up because his frozen little heart had never been tested before.
It had taken losing Sabo to realize just how much Ace had messed up. He was no stranger to pain or any sort. But he never expected just how much things could hurt him now. A deep kind of hurt, that rested in his bones and stayed there. The kind of hurt that he didn't know existed.
And that's when he finally understood fear. Because the world didn't care. Not about him, not about his family, and not about what was fair.
XXX
Ace had liked Marco. Not right away. He had been too weary of the man to allow that. But it happened all the same without his consent. He couldn't help it, he had ended up liking them all. And despite knowing that one day it was all going to blow up in his face, after all those months, he started to think about his future. His future with them. He started to think about what life might be like with all of them. And it made him happy. Really and truly happy. He had even been thinking about, telling them about Lu, and maybe even about Rodger, maybe about absolutely everything.
Because maybe they were different- maybe his entire life, Ace hadn't given people nearly enough credit. He had especially liked Marco. The man seemed like he knew what he was thinking, without Ace needing to say it. It was a little uncanny. But more than that it reminded Ace of Sabo. Of what having someone watching your back felt like. And he had missed it.
…
The two of them moved together in unison, no words exchanged past their mouths. They didn't need them. Teach was tough but together Whitebeards' first and second-division commanders were better.
Ace could see the sweat on the man's brow as they circled for another attack, a ring of fire matching the man's darkness. Bright orange and cool blue tangled together, pushing Teach back a step, and then another until his back was quite literally up a wall.
"Look at you two," the man spat, "getting along so well. Isn't that heartwarming? Since when do Whitebeards forgive betrayal so easily."
"You're mistaking blackmail and betrayal again," Marco told him, never once losing focus in his movements. "I would have thought you of all people knew the difference."
"Today sure," Teach said, "he's your friend again now that he needs your help. "But you can't trust him. You know that right? After all the lies? Was there a single true thing you told us- commander?" There was a snarl in Teach's voice.
"How much I hate you." Ace lashed out, his arm coated in fire as he lunged at Teach, missing by centimeters and striking the rocky wall instead. It cracked under the force.
"It wasn't personal."
"Yes, it was." He ducked down, letting Marco kick out, one hand anchored on Ace's shoulder to leverage his movement as his wings unfurled giving the attack all the more power. Unlike Ace's attempt the move landed and Teach was thrown back into the rock wall, coughing heavily.
"How can you be – be sure," Teach coughed heavily, spitting up blood ruefully as he rose to his feet, stretching his shadows further causing the two of them to take a step away from him. "How can you be sure he isn't still in Rodger's pocket? Finishing what he started?"
Oh for the love of, "I don't even know him," Ace said, for what felt like the millionth time. "And I hate him. Why would I help a man who caused me nothing but problems?"
Teach's eyes gleamed with interest, his shadows pausing in their journey, twisting and turning where they lay as if reflecting the man's intrigue. "I bet you would do anything to keep that from getting out then… anything."
"Yes," Ace growled, taking a step forwards, shadows be damned. "I would have…. before you kidnapped my brother. Now I don't care." That was a bit of a lie. But Ace's priorities had quickly fallen into place when he realized Luffy was in danger, and as it turned out Rodger was not at the top of the list.
Teach rolled his eyes, "Oh for- he's not even your damn brother. What is wrong with you? He's not your blood, he's nothing. He's some kid related to an enemy of your father. His own family doesn't even want him. Are you that desperate not to be alone commander- or should I say Gol. D Ace?-AHHH."
It was Marco who struck out this time in Ace's place, his raging fire flaring up at that, pouring across Teach so unexpectedly that his shadows took a moment to catch up, acting as a vacuum the flames were bright but short-lived as they all but evaporated, leaving the man burned but still standing, swearing up a storm.
It was Marco who had been goaded by that one, his usually cool face crinkled in anger. "All that time," he said. "You spent all that time with us. And you still can't understand. Not even a little. We really didn't know you."
"Understand what?" Teach turned back to Ace. "How to be soft like all of you. Like that doddering old man. Where has any of that gotten you? Oh you, I had such high hopes when I found out. The son of the greatest pirate- well until now of course- not only was he on my crew. It was my very own commander. I thought you were a killer. I thought you understood what needed to be done. But You Are Just Like Them Aren't You? Pathetic, and weak. I'm glad Rodger's dead. Saves him from seeing the disappointment you turned out to be.
That was probably the highest compliment anyone could have given Ace. And coming from Teach it meant a lot. "I hope you are right about that," Ace told him stepping forward to be by Marco's side. "I really do."
Teach looked up at them, first Marco, and then Ace, and the fire that lay beyond them, lacing up their arms like armor. He licked his lips as if they were suddenly dry. "So what? After all of this, you are going to kill me. Rescue the kid. Get back to your pretend family. Everyone will just forgive you. The Revolutionaries will retreat respectfully. The brat will live on, all thanks to you."
Ace started to close in on him, not interested in whatever the man had to say. But the shadows held him back all the same. He knew from experience how much they hurt if you let them get you.
"Don't you want to know," Teach's voice was lower now, almost soft. "What happened? All those months …completely at my mercy. Don't you want to know what we did to him?"
Ace stopped mid-step, having to remind himself to breathe. No, a small part of him protested. He never wanted to know. Lu was tough. He knew that much. And he already knew exactly how much he had handled over the course of his life with no more than some tears and whining. But this was different somehow. This wasn't just some graphic but ultimately a temporary wound. This wasn't something Luffy could just eat his way out of and shrug off was it?
Ace shook his head mutely but Teach saw right through him. "You don't want to know- but at the same time you need to, am I right? Like this burning sick fascination. You want to know if you can fix it. See if it wasn't so bad after all. See if it's survivable- if he's going to be all right? Well, don't worry. It's not worth the hassle trust me. I'll tell you right now. He won't be. Not really."
"Stop talking," Marco growled.
"You were the last thing he said," Teach continued, ignoring Marco. "He kept waiting for you to save him… called your name and everyone. It was kind of sweet. Like he really thought you were going to help him." The man was grinning, his yellow teeth stained in blood. " You didn't though- you never came- and the cipher pol agent got carried away… and he died."
Teach paused, watching as Ace's eyes grew wide, his own smile growing as well as if feeding off the other. "There's that look commander.
"He's not dead," Marco said.
"Oh, we brought him back. We couldn't let him escape. Not that easily. "But he was never really the same after that…"
"I'm going to kill you," Marco swore, his hand clasping Ace's shoulder. But the teenager said nothing, still staring at Teach.
A noise to their right broke the tension, drawing their gaze.
Thatch stood, off to the site, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. He looked at Teach, his eyes narrowing, before locking on Ace and Marco.
"What are you doing here-," Marco began but Thatch cut him off.
"Help," the man said breathlessly, his face ashen like he had just seen a ghost. He gestured towards the cliffs. "It's Luffy- Marco you have to…. You have to help."
Things got a little fuzzy after that. Ace heard Marco swearing and the grip on his wrist tightened. He heard Thatch's jumbled instructions on where to go. And he heard Marco swearing as he broke free from his grip, Teach's laughter echoing around then as he turned away from them all.
By the time Ace had realized what he had done, he was already running.
XXX
It was late summer now, and the air was warm and still. Luffy had always loved summer. He liked winter too, and fall, and spring, and just generally he liked to like things. But summer was his favorite when the air was warm, and the food was easy to find. He also liked how, in July the sun would usually set gold, and in that last hour of light the world seemed to come alive. The whole mountain lit up once it dipped behind the trees as if illuminated from the inside. And in that time before night set in the air seemed the shimmer. It was beautiful. And maybe Ace's last time seeing it. He was sixteen now, with just a couple of months left here. He knew this, and as ready as he was to leave this place, he was also guilty about leaving his little brother. So he had gotten even more easygoing to try and appease his conscience. So he would let Luffy do whatever he wanted more and more. And tonight, Luffy had wanted to collect the fireflies. Like they were six. And like always Ace had eventually given in.
Everyone who met him thought Luffy was so sweet and kind. But Ace knew the truth. He was a total brat. Like the biggest one, Ace had ever met. He rivaled even the nobles by sheer willpower alone. How someone could own so little and be so spoiled was beyond Ace. But one thing he had learned was Luffy always always got his way. When he really wanted something, he dug his heels in and refused to let go. The annoying thing was it always worked. Lu was relentless when he set his mind to something, and at a certain point, it was far easier to just give in to him than keep fighting it. He literally bent the people around him to his will. Ace had no clue how he did it. Even freaking Dadan gave in to him. Dadan! The woman who had thrown her shoe at Ace when he asked if he could have an extra cup of rice on his eleventh birthday. She was no match for Luffy. Well… a couple alcohol alcohol-fueled nervous breakdowns later and she was no match for him.
Ace was no different, was he? When exactly had he become a total pushover? Well, whatever, it was already far too late for him.
Luffy held up the jar to him, giving it a good shake. Even in the approaching darkness, it was glowing like a night light.
"What are we going to do with them?" Ace asked him, sitting back in the grass of the field the bugs liked to frequent, not that he couldn't see why. It was warm and dry here, and the grass was soft underneath him.
Luffy thought for a moment, his head tilted as he stared at the bottle. "If I eat them, will I glow?"
"Only your butt!"
Luffy looked up sharply, eyes wide. "Really?"
"I'll never lose you again," Ace told him. "I'll just wait for it to get dark and then- "
"Bam! My butt."
"Your butt," Ace agreed as Luffy came to sit next to him, still holding the jar. It had taken nearly an hour to get them, and for a while, it seemed like Luffy wouldn't be satisfied until every single bug in the clearing was in that jar. But now, with the rest rising up around them he seemed content to let them go. Although Ace could tell he was seriously thinking about it. Their glowing lights reflected in his dark eyes as he watched him. Luffy wouldn't be satisfied until he had the world. Spoiled as hell! Thank god bugs, strangers, straw hats, and food were the only things Luffy seemed to consider worth anything.
Ace took the jar from him, inspecting their spoils. "We can take them back to the bandits, let them loose in the house."
Luffy smiled at the idea. "Yeah but… I kinda want to eat them. Do I want a glowing butt though?"
God, he was so so weird. "I don't know, do you?"
Luffy frowned, deliberating the pros and cons in his head. "A little," he admitted.
Of course, he did. "Eat one," Ace told him. "We'll see what happens. Maybe it will go to your eyes and then you can see in the dark."
"Really!"
"Oh sure," he really made it too easy sometimes. Ace watched him chase the insects around, tripping and cursing as he did so. Running through the field with endless energy. some days what Ace wouldn't give for five minutes of peace. He shut his eyes, feeling the warm breeze run through the grass. Still, though, this was nice.
A second later he felt Luffy return, dropping beside him his hands cupped around several glow bugs. Ace sat up, watching as Luffy swallowed them, making a face before spitting them out.
"They taste bad."
They might be poisonous honestly, Ace didn't know. Although, that didn't stop him from widening his eyes, fixing his vision on Luffy's forehead. "Oh shit!" he swore. "Lu, your head. I think you swallowed one."
"What!" His hands jumped to his forehead, trying to feel it. "What is it!"
"It's glowing," Ace lied.
"It's not."
"It is," Ace poked him hard between the eyes. "Wow, that looks really bad. Do you feel okay!"
"Ahh!" Luffy began to panic now as he tried to force himself to spit out the bug he hadn't actually eaten. "Ace help!"
Ace didn't help. He was doubled over, holding his sides as he laughed. It took a moment for Luffy to realize he had been played, and predictably he was not happy.
"You jerk!" He kicked him in the ribs.
"OW!" Ace twisted to avoid the next hit, grabbing Luffy's foot and twisted violently (he really didn't have to play nice with a boy made out of rubber).
Luffy went down, arms flailing as he landed on top of Ace, his bony elbow nailing the older in the stomach. They stayed down for a couple of minutes, fighting each other. Ace playful, and Luffy desperately as if his life depended on it. He lost all the same, ending up face down, with Ace easily sitting on top of him, still laughing. "God Lu."
Luffy muttered moodily as he pulled himself up. "When I'm pirate king I'll win, and then you'll have to eat the dirt."
That made Ace laugh harder. "When you're some hot shot pirate, you're going to come and find me so you can sit on me."
"YES!" Luffy said like this plan was the most normal, understandable thing ever.
Battling back annoyance, and fondness, a strange combination, Ace reached out, grabbing Luffy in a headlock as he pulled the other onto his side, grinding his knuckles a top of his head and feeling Luffy squirm beneath him. "You are such a brat! How are you going to be pirate king. Most pirates don't let their brothers push them around."
"It's not my fault you're so strong," Luffy panted, face red by the time he managed to break free. He opened his mouth to fight more, already annoyed when his eyes went to Ace's face, the fight draining out of him.
Both of them watched in silence as one of the fireflies lazily made its way across the clearing, landing on Ace's nose.
Neither boy breathed for a full second, watching it flutter, its wings stretching for a moment before it took flight again.
Luffy snorted, thinking it was funny. "It liked you," he told Ace.
"Probably because I didn't try to eat it."
Luffy laughed harder, sitting back in the field. It was getting darker. They should go back soon, or find someplace to sleep for the night. Someplace that wasn't a field. There were still plenty of animals around. The stars would be out any…
Ace stood up suddenly, grabbing the jar. "Come on. I have an idea."
XXX
Ace crashed down beside Sabo, too numb to feel his skin scrap against the rocks, he was too numb to feel anything.
Sabo looked pale. Deathly so.
"What happened!" Ace was finding it hard to breathe as he looked down at Luffy, then back to Sabo, as if the blond had any answers for him.
He saw blood. Lots of it. Spilling from his little brother's chest, making a puddle around them. It was too much blood. Even for Luffy?
He didn't understand. There was no weapon, no offending monster nearby. There was just Sabo, pale and silent, his hands bare and covered in blood pressed against Luffy's chest. Ace didn't hesitate, he placed his own hands, warm and sturdy by comparison, over Sabo's as he pressed down. Luffy didn't make a sound.
"What happened!" he said again, his voice sounding alien to him.
"Someone stabbed him."
"Who!" Ace looked around at the carnage, seeing nothing and no one willing to accept his wrath.
"It doesn't matter!" Sabo's own voice was very soft. "Where's Marco?"
It did matter. It mattered so much. Ace looked down at Luffy's face. Covered in dirt and blood, his face was serious, with not a hint of his usual smile. He didn't understand- he didn't understand- he didn't understand. Luffy was supposed to be safe with Thatch. Who would stab him? Why would they do that? Why wasn't he here to stop them? Why had he let Luffy out of his sight? Why wasn't anyone doing anything? Why wasn't it him?
"Ace!"
Sabo's voice snapped him out of it. And he looked up, feeling as if he were in a trance. Where was Marco? Ace had thought the other man was following. But honestly, he had kind of blacked out for a bit there. This didn't feel real to him. How could it be? He shook his head and Sabo's swore, although there was no real venom in it, his voice was hollow.
Ace watched as he reached out again to Luffy's neck, the area stained with bloody fingerprints from too many attempts. Sabo frowned, his eyes flitting down to Luffy's face. And Ace found himself too scared to ask what Sabo felt. No, it wasn't fear. Ace knew what he felt. They both had haki, they both knew what it looked like when someone was…
"Come on Lu," Sabo's voice was soft, resting his palm on Luffy's cheek. "Come on."
Ace remembered earlier, when Luffy had started to choke, and they had been able to do nothing but sit there and watch. That had been awful. It was violent, bloody, and horrible. But somehow Ace had known it would be okay. Because all his friends ex- friends were there, and hated him as they may, he knew they wouldn't let Luffy die. And what's more, he knew Luffy wouldn't let Luffy die. Not then, not down there.
This whole time, Ace knew how serious the situation was, he knew how close his baby brother would come to dying. But somehow, he had never actually entertained the idea Luffy would die. Not now, and not since he got the note from Teach. He had known he would find a way to save him because… well because he had to. There was no other way.
A world without Luffy was just… it was too lonely to imagine. He had never seriously thought Lu would….
XXX
The ocean swam below the cliff, the stars above them. It was warm here, the summer breeze sweeping them towards the sea and into the openness beyond.
"Ready?"
"Ready," Luffy held out the jar, opening the lid to free the fireflies.
They moved together, like one entity. Dozens and Dozens of little dazzling fairy lights were swept from their cage, carried away by the wind, right over the cliff. But they didn't fall. They stayed there, whirled and dancing in the breeze. They looked like magic, chasing each other towards the sky. They were like stars. Dozens of tiny little stars, began their ascent into the sky.
Luffy was beaming, his smile enough to rival the whole lot of them.
"Bye you guys. Be free now."
XXX
Ace hugged Luffy to him, his hand never moving from the wound on his chest. That would be giving up. And Ace would never give up. No on his baby brother. Not now, and not in a million years.
Still, he held him close, resting his cheek on the black hair, covered in seawater and dirt and blood.
Bye. Be free now.
Ace felt his nose sting, and he squeezed his eyes shut even tighter. "Bye Luffy," he whispered into his hair.
Bye. Be free now.
He couldn't say it. Because he didn't mean it. He didn't want that. He didn't ever want that. "Bye Luffy. Don't leave me. Don't ever leave me."
Ace could see himself- his much younger self staring at them from across the battlefield. Disgust on his face. Disgust at his older self for doing this to them, for falling for it. That part of himself that was so angry, and cold, and violent. That part was screaming.
XXX
This lucky duck got to go to Europe with her family in September, and then I had some shift work up north again finishing up a project. (And tryouts for roller derby, and search and rescue, and volleyball.) It was a busy two months. But now that I am back, and my new goal in life is finishing the war arc. I think one more chapter? But it is halfway done already so I will try to update it next Saturday :) and I can finally start writing cute stuff. (It's my birthday and apparently, this is how I chose to spend it once again, I think I have a problem?)
So I really want you guys to tell me how you want the net section of this story to go. I was leaning towards a slow recovery process for just about everyone, but you guys tell me what you want to happen because if I keep getting my way this fic is going to be like two hundred chapters when it was really meant to be twelve.
For the person asking for a French version. Merry Gallehl translated the first chapter because they are awesome.
Also, to all of our complete shock. Fanfics email alerts are broken again. So I will actually get around to updating this story on AO3 sometime this month so I can start using that site as a primary because…like…. Ugggg
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VayNami: I think your worries about Ace have been founded. He's not doing so hot. So the timing is a bit messed up as last chapter from Luffy's perspective time was moving a lot quicker then it was in the real world. But the point where his hand is on fire (in the dream) hasn't happened yet. IDK if that made any sense. Hopefully it will make mre sense as it all unfolds : )
Crazykittylover: AWW thanks. And thank you again haha. Poor Luffy indeed. But I am seriously done killing him this time. Otherwise he is just Kenny from south park. (And that is so sweet to hear). I will do my best on AO3 as soon as I can because fanfic dot net is getting annoying for sure. I hope you have an awesome day.
eri1325: Our baby will live, I promise.
Kitsune Foxfire: AWWW, well that is really sweet. I do have the story backed up, and hopefully soon on AO3 instead. It does indeed seem like fanfiction is a slowly sinking ship. (I am so glad you liked the chapter.
Goliatth: Garp is off his rocker. He is a very strange presence in one piece. You are never quite sure where he is coming from. But he really does love his grandkids even if he has a weird way of showing it.
Yes, I am still debating about Nika. Because it feels too early for Luffy to go full super sayon, but it would also be so cool. And yes, I can not wait to write all the scenes of Marco silently going insane trying to figure out what is wrong with Luffy while everyone else just thinks he is. I think right now the plan is for Asl and the whitebeards to stay together, although at first it is going to be a bit… rocky.
I am so glad you liked Nika. I tried my best with that chapter and had a lot of fun. Even if it was not canon-compliant at all.
No, Luffy is never going to lose his powers. I know that was a really confusing chapter. I probably made it too vague and metaphorical. But Nika was testing him with that question. Nika knows Luffy is not ready 'yet' to fully awaken his fruit, but they also know that Luffy will be the person to awaken it. So Luffy still has his powers and will keep them when he wakes up/ it will help keep him alive for the time being. But Nika will probably go 'back to sleep' until Luffy is ready to awaken it for real when he is older and surer of himself.
…
I would love telepathy. I could take over for fanfiction dot net and handle the email updates for them… but with my mind. (Oh my gosh, Luffy and Thatch alone against the world would have been a better name then Defenders, gosh darn it, I am still mad at sixteen year old me for half ass-ing the title.
Promised fluff coming hopefully at the end of the month. I will dedicate my life to finishing up the sad part of this story.
Lol, sheep. I think all three boys are going to end up in therapy. (Maintaining a friendship with Luffy definitely gave Thatch a psychosis).
You may have. I think it was two or three chapters ago, right at the end. Luffy was stabbed through the chest by the marine guy.
(than you for the nice updates. I loved reading them. I am so glad you liked the story. Hopefully you liked this chapter as well- hugs back-)
Eternal She-Wolf: You must have been thinking hard again :)
Aww, thanks. Marco is going to have his work cut out for him in a few chapters. It's hard being the oldest sibling. Unfortunately, he is having a hard time distancing himself from Luffy and Sabo try as he might. He just has a soft spot for idiots. Doubly unfortunate- Sabo is quickly becoming his responsibility.
I looked up Xolo Maridueña and I am quite on board to be future Mrs. Mariduena.
Urutiyori: That is alright, I think we have a volunteer. That would be cool if there was a French version. I just stumbled across the Russian version of the story and it has really taken off. I got to read the Russian reviews and that was interesting.
Go team dyslexia. ( my spelling and grammar is horrible too haha). I have gotten several requests in different languages to translate, and I am always flattered. I am just happy people like the story. They can take it and do whatever they like with it, even write a version where all the characters are cats, haha.
Ace is quite mad. He is a spicy boi. These net two chapters are going to be quite Ace-centric.
Chimui: Yeah, this is not everyone's best day. I checked out that song and it is very pretty. I would love to see that art haha.
Djihye: of course, Luffy will be okay in the end… maybe just not right now.
caramel waffles: Wow I love your screen name. In middle school I made everyone call my waffle (because I was a weird kid). But I promise Luffy is going to be okay in a few chapters. And in the end. Right now he's a bit hurt. Don't cry, he's a sun god. He will be okay.
Catspirit: I think a lot of the pirates already know about Garp. Ace told them in the tunnels. But after everything Ace has revealed they are running out of things to be shocked about.
Nancy2239: Aww, I am glad you liked it. I am happy to help : ) Hopefully you liked this one as well. I will try and be quick with my net one too.
Abehsi: Of course.
Zahadacem: About one more chapter of active suffering, then it's more like passive guilt that gradually lightens as Luffy feels better.
Guest: will try to update again soon.
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Hellwyrm: Oh my goodness, that is just the tip of the iceberg my friend. There are so so many spelling mistakes in this fic. Like it hurts my heart. To this day I don't know how to spell minute. I have to let autocorrect do it for me. I am so surprised they just keep letting me write : ) I think everyone just collectively gave up. (I am very dyslexic) so a lot of the mistakes my brain corrects for me, so I have a hard time catching them/ I write this very late at night, and around three in the morning I just give up. But one day I will go through and edit… maybe.
Pause143: Yay, I am glad you liked it. I am not sure how far I will go with gear five. But we shall see. I am always open to suggestions fi you have any ideas.
JackFrost23: Aww, glad you liked it. Thank you for sharing. I always love to hear that.
Anonymous : why thank you. Let me know when you catch up haha. The story changes quite a bit from that point on but I am glad you are a Sabo fan.
Ppleater: Awwww, wow, you are so nice to me. That is so sweet to hear. I am always worried if the characters aren't coming off correctly. But wow. What a nice review. Aww shucks. I hope you like this chapter as well.
Aquarica: They are three very unlucky boys. I think on the surface Sabo is very put together until you do all of this to him, then he starts to fall apart. -And he makes it Marco's problem haha.
.7: No I definitely write too slowly. It's just more fun for me. But probably not to read. I'm sure I would hate myself if I was on the other side of this haha. You guys are more patient then I would be.
evelynromano0808: well thank you.
Onar27: Hello again,
I'm glad you liked the latest chapter. I do actually plan out the chapters and plot points years in advance. And started to plot for a Nika subplot as soon as it was introduced in the manga. Although that was more of an addition, it didn't change any of my plans, just made the story a bit longer. Ever since I introduced the Sea kings I was always going to have Luffy befriend it, and then have it die helping him. Luffy can't control Sea Kings like Shirahoshi but he can hear them, so I figured maybe there is a weird Sea King out there that takes a liking to him just because. I'm sure the tone of the chapters changes each time. I think that's probably the type of music I'm listening to at the moment haha. I'm not sure I abandoned any story lines, but if you noticed any that didn't get concluded let me know and I can for sure take a look.
I don't think Ace is ever aloof. I think he has been feeling bad since the start. But he did leave Luffy to try and hurt those responsible. Hindsight it was a bad decision but at the time he thought it was the right one. And that's fair, he did totally lie to Luffy, that wasn't very nice of him haha. But he did know he was lying when he promised not to leave. This was always his plan. Ace has a problem with letting stuff go. ( As seen in the Marineford arc). It seems more in character for him to try and get revenge for Luffy then to sit out a war. But that's just my take. I am sure everyone has their own of the character.
Mel72000: Tragically Ace needs a lot of therapy.
Wishfull-star: I think the Teach killing will have to wait a lil bit. I am glad you liked it :)