He had to get to Kimblee.
He couldn't let him get away.
Kimblee's chimeras were in front of him, trapped under debris. That bastard, he didn't even care about his own men.
Clapping, Ed focused on transmuting the remains of the building off of them. Good. They were free. Now to get to Kimblee—
Pain. Immeasurable pain flared up his side as he tried to get himself on all fours. Ed gasped as he momentarily lost his balance, his head whipping round to look over his shoulder—
"You've gotta be fucking kidding me."
He was fucking impaled with a fucking beam—
There was blood flowing out of him, too much blood, he was going to pass out if he didn't stop it.
Fuck, he was going to die.
Panic caused chills to run through his body, adrenaline surging through his veins as that realisation hit him.
He was going to die.
He tried to breathe through the way his chest constricted, tried to fend off the panic attack. It was only going to do more harm than good right now. He needed to fucking think.
Hands gripped him, and suddenly he was resting against a firm back. Kimblee's chimeras were talking to him, but Ed was formulating a plan. He had to close the wound, he had to—
"Take the beam out of me. I'll close the wound with alchemy."
They looked at each other, hesitating. If Ed had been able to he would've yelled at them to hurry the fuck up—there was no time to spare.
"Are you even familiar with medical alchemy?"
No, no he wasn't, but what he was planning didn't need alkahestry.
"I'm gonna use my life as a philosopher's stone."
The beam coming out of him was pure agony, agony like he'd never felt before, way worse than automail installation, than losing his damn limbs in the first place. He gritted his teeth, an animalistic growl of pain escaping, but he readied his hands—
The moment the beam was fully out he clapped, and thought of the Gate, of how it felt to perform human transmutation, of how it felt to use souls as fuel for alchemy—right now he was merely a soul, his own life using itself as payment to remain alive, just a little while longer.
The blue flash of light was blinding, and he clenched his eyes shut—focus, focus, focus.
This would take some time off his lifespan, but he'd rather that than die right now. People needed him, Al needed him—he couldn't fucking die yet goddammit!
He felt the wound closing, the tissues repairing themselves just enough to stop the bleeding—
Roy startled awake, covered in a thin layer of sweat. It was still dark outside. He didn't know what time it was, and he didn't care. He was panting as the dream lingered in his mind.
This was—
Ed had—
Throwing the covers off himself, he rushed out to the hallway and switched on the light—
"You used your life as a philosopher's stone!?"
Ed blinked hazily at him, and that was when Roy noticed Ed was shaking. All the air left his lungs as he kneeled on the mattress, gripping Ed's shoulder. "Are you all right?"
Ed was taking deep breaths as he sat on the mattress, a thin layer of sweat glistening on his forehead. He waved a hand at him dismissively, but Roy could tell he was shaken by the dream. "It's fine, it was just on my mind I guess."
Had he triggered this? Had Ed been thinking about it because of the amount of Roy's shit he'd been subjected to recently?
Was this Roy's fault, that Ed was sitting here shaking and remnants of panic were flowing through the bond?
Roy gulped and tried to calm his racing heart. Ed feeling his panic through the bond was surely not helpful to him right now.
He sat next to him on the mattress, leaning against the wall like Ed was. He watched, silent, as Ed closed his eyes and let his head fall against the wall. The panic through the bond was slowly but surely lessening.
He had gently brushed Ed's bangs out of his face before he'd realised what he was doing. Ed cracked an eye open and looked at him. "It's fine, really."
Roy let his hand drop and looked at him seriously. "It really isn't."
Ed chuckled, and rolled his head on the wall to face him fully. "Look at you, worrying about me."
"I've always worried about you."
Ed smiled, and let his head fall on Roy's shoulder. Roy let him—more than let him. His cheek was almost nuzzling against his blond head, his nose so close it was filled with his scent. It was calming him.
They were silent, Ed's soft breathing the only sound Roy heard. It was a sound he was forever grateful he got to hear.
"You used your life as a philosopher's stone," Roy repeated, this time a whole lot calmer.
Ed shifted slightly, and Roy thought he was going to lift his head from his shoulder, but he'd just scooted closer. "It was either that or lose my life completely."
A lump formed in his throat just at the thought that he could've lost Ed and been none the wiser. "How long did it take off your lifespan?"
He felt Ed shrug. "Not too much I don't think. A few years."
A few years. That was too much. But not having Ed right now was inconceivable.
"You truly are brilliant, Edward."
For Ed to successfully perform such complex alchemy, under that amount of stress, so close to death…Most people wouldn't even be able to reach that level of genius with all the books in the world available to them, and Ed had done so while fucking impaled.
Ed's low chuckle vibrated through Roy's body. "You're full of compliments lately."
Roy shot an admonishing glance at Ed's blond head. "How can you even be sarcastic right now?"
Ed turned his head, so his chin rested on Roy's shoulder instead, and he grinned up at him. "I can always be sarcastic."
Their noses brushed they were so close. Roy stared into those golden eyes he admired so much, noting the humour in them, the fondness he was, by some miracle, the recipient of, and he really wanted to kiss him.
So he did.
He leaned in, his hand coming to rest on Ed's cheek, and connected their lips.
Ed wasn't surprised. Roy didn't know why he had expected him to be. His warm hand came to tangle in the hair on Roy's nape, pulling him closer.
His entire body tingled at the contact with Ed, at their bodies' proximity. His lips were so soft, so perfect—how could Ed be this perfect?
Teeth nipped his bottom lip and a small gasp escaped him in his surprise. Arousal flared through him, and his hand lowered from Ed's cheek, down the side of his neck. His other hand wrapped around Ed's back as he slowly lowered them to the mattress.
He never wanted Ed to be this shaken again. He wanted him to forget about that horrible dream. He wanted Ed to say he was happy again. Roy would settle for nothing less.
The kiss deepened, their tongues clashing and Ed letting out a little moan that drove Roy just that bit closer to insanity.
His hand roamed down Ed's torso, down to the waistband of his boxers, and Ed's fist in his hair tightened, his other coming to rest on his shoulder.
Roy dipped his hand in the boxers. Ed was hard already, and Roy's hand wrapped around his erection, the action feeling so familiar, and started pleasuring him. Ed broke the kiss to gasp, his eyes looking at him, glazed and wanton, and Roy couldn't imagine a time, a universe, where he didn't want to see that expression on Ed's face anymore.
"Take them off," Ed rasped, rolling his hips.
Roy obeyed, reaching down and ridding Ed of the boxers, and then claiming his lips again. He leaned over him, keeping his weight up with one forearm above Ed's head. His other hand reached back down, fisting Ed's cock and pumping him harder.
Ed whimpered against his lips, his hips bucking again.
Roy could barely breathe as he kissed him, his lips trailing down, away from Ed's lips to his neck, and Ed so beautifully tipped his head back, baring his throat for him.
His lips, his tongue, his teeth, lost no time—kissing, tasting, nipping. Ed's breathy moans were making him harder, to the point where he was throbbing in his boxers.
Who wouldn't be aroused by seeing Ed like this?
Ed's grip on his hair was borderline painful, but it was only arousing him further. Everything Ed did right now would arouse him—Ed just being himself aroused him, Ed just giving in to the pleasure Roy wanted to give him.
I've wanted you for years.
Ed's words were on his mind as he nipped and sucked on the scar on his shoulder. Ed let out a sound that was half a hiss and half a gasp. Ed wanted this, and Roy wanted him to have what he wanted. He deserved everything he wanted.
Roy went lower, softly biting his nipple—and Ed's breath hitched.
He paused at the scar on his side. "Is this sensitive too?" he asked, his lips softly grazing the scarred skin.
His eyes flickered up to Ed's face to see him lick his lips and shake his head.
Interesting.
He gave a small kiss to the scar, the injury he had used his genius mind to heal, and then went further, to his abs, tracing the contours of each muscle with the tip of his tongue and tasting the faint saltiness of sweat. His hand followed, caressing down his torso.
When he reached the hand fisting his cock, he paused, flicking his eyes up to Ed's once more.
Ed's flushed face stared down at him with molten gold eyes, red lips parted and gasping for air.
It wasn't enough. Roy wanted to watch him lose control, he wanted to watch him scrunch his face up so beautifully as the pleasure reached torture.
Roy leaned down and took Ed's cock in his mouth. Ed threw his head back on the pillow and groaned, spine arching off the mattress. The action felt familiar, as though they'd always done this, as though they weren't commanding officer and subordinate. As though last time Roy hadn't panicked and left Ed confused and alone.
He tried to take as much as possible in his mouth, bobbing his head and looking up at Ed. Ed gazed down at him, rushed, panting breaths escaping his lips. His chest was flushed and heaving with every breath, his lower abs tensing as Roy pleasured him.
He raked his fingers through Roy's hair, pushing it up and out of his face, and he licked his glistening lips. "Fuck, you look good like that."
Roy pulled back just enough to smirk at him. "I always look good."
Before Ed could reply, he went back down, taking so much of his length the tip hit the back of his throat. He tried to breathe through it, to deepthroat him until Ed was basically incoherent.
Ed gasped just as he'd been about to speak, and all that came out was a strained, guttural growl of, "Cocky bastard."
He grabbed the back of Ed's thighs, pushing them up and apart, and sucked harder, hollowing his cheeks as he came all the way up—and then went all the way back down.
Ed's breathing was laboured, his moans deep and choked, his hand fisting Roy's hair in a death grip, the other almost ripping the covers off the mattress.
He bobbed his head faster, his eyes never leaving Ed's face. Ed tried to watch him, but his eyelids would flutter and a moan would follow—and it was the most attractive thing Roy had ever witnessed.
"Fuck," Ed growled, the sound coming from deep in his throat, and he rolled his hips as the orgasm took over.
Roy felt the spike of pleasure through the bond as his cock throbbed in his mouth. He swallowed Ed's hot release but kept sucking, until it reached torturous levels of pleasure and Ed let out a strangled growl. He bucked so hard Roy's eyes watered, and he slowly came up, panting and slightly coughing as he caught his breath.
His cheeks felt hot as he crawled up Ed's body. He placed his hands on either side of his head and stared at his gorgeous, blissed out face, his hair fanned out around his head on the pillow. His own face was probably an unattractive, blotchy mess, but Ed's cheeks and chest were flushed to perfection, his lips so red and perfect.
Ed flushed like a fucking God.
Ed's hand on his nape pushed him down, and he caught Roy's lips in a lazy, wet kiss. Roy's neglected cock was throbbing in his boxers, but he ignored it; this moment was Ed's, just Ed's.
Roy found himself being pushed down on the mattress, Ed's teeth biting his bottom lip as his hands trailed down his chest. Ed's lips left his to bite his neck roughly, and Roy inhaled sharply at the quick flare of pain.
When he started going lower and his intention became clear, Roy put his hands on his shoulders and gently pushed him back. "Ed, you don't have to just because I—"
"Shut up."
Ed bit his neck again, roughly, admonishingly, and Roy didn't think he could possibly get any harder than this. But his control was in place—it had to stay that way.
He didn't want this to become about him—he'd wanted this to be about Ed, and only Ed. He hated the thought that Ed would do this out of any sort of obligation to equivalent exchange. He didn't want to feel like he was taking advantage.
"Ed." Roy's grip on his shoulders tightened, and Ed lifted his head to look at his face. His cheeks were still flushed, his eyes still slightly glazed from his orgasm. Roy gently grasped his chin. "You're tired, we should get back to sleep."
Ed narrowed his eyes at him, searching—for what, Roy couldn't even begin to guess.
But he relented, slowly rolling to the side, off Roy and back on the mattress.
He should let Ed sleep, and that meant attempting to get back to sleep himself.
He had just begun pushing himself up to a seated position the same time Ed's arm wrapped around his chest, and they both froze.
Ed's eyes widened and he blushed bright red—pure mortification flowed through the bond and he snatched his arm back as though Roy had burned him.
Roy blinked down at him from his seated position.
Had he just—
Had Ed just been about to cuddle him?
Roy didn't know what to think as he silently stared at Ed, who looked like he'd rather transmute the rest of his lifespan away than meet Roy's eyes.
He had been about to go back to his own bed. He'd just—assumed. It hadn't even occurred to him that Ed would've maybe wanted him to stay.
But he shouldn't fall asleep next to Ed. It was too dangerous. He hadn't had a night terror in a long while, but acting out his nightmares absolutely terrified him—and now that he could use alchemy with a simple clap…What if he got startled and attacked Ed by accident?
He would never forgive himself if he hurt Ed.
Ed must've felt Roy's hesitation, because he pursed his lips, and a flicker of hurt zapped through the bond. "Whatever, go back to your bed." With that, he turned his back to Roy and brought the duvet up to his chest.
Goddammit, Roy had somehow already ruined it.
The responsible part of his brain told him not to risk it, that it was too dangerous—but he didn't want Ed to be upset either.
"Do you want me to stay?" he asked carefully, making sure his voice was gentle and betrayed none of his inner turbulence.
"Not if you don't want to," Ed shot back, sounding almost angry, but it was the sting of hurt that flowed through the bond.
"It's not that," Roy said softly as he lowered himself back to the mattress. He'd expected Ed to prod, ask for details, but he didn't.
The sulky feeling he could feel through the bond made him smile despite himself.
He snaked an arm around Ed's middle, and pulled him closer, against his chest. "I'll stay."
Tonight was Ed's.
He felt Ed's rigid body slowly relax, and his fingers hesitantly threaded themselves through Roy's own.
As Roy held him, an unfamiliar feeling erupted in his chest. It was more than fondness—it was filled with protectiveness and affection, and in that moment Roy made a promise to himself.
Ed would never go through hell ever again.
Roy would never let anything happen to him. He would kill anyone who hurt him. He would burn their flesh so slowly they felt every layer burn down to the bone.
His arm tightened protectively around Ed, and soon sleep took over them once more.