Chapter 65

Surrender

The Resistance team experienced quite a shootout in the remote rocky section of the park. It was necessary to destroy the Liquid Metal Terminator.

John Henry's server made sure there wouldn't be any 911 calls if anyone reported anything. It was standard procedure for whenever they were on an operation. It kept the authorities and emergency responders away. By keeping them out of the combat zone, it also kept them safer.

The team left Dan, Frank, Al and Ed to clean up and police the area. They made sure there were no empty shell casings left behind. They also made sure there was no trace of the Liquid Metal Terminator. It may have actually only been a small piece of the Liquid Metal Terminator which visited John during the night. There was no way to know at this point. They hoped there wasn't more of it out there.

John went back to the Resistance base with the others. He was still very uneasy about everything which occurred at the park, and last night.

Vanna and Allison both stayed with him when they returned. Allison insisted they remain with him. She had her reasons…. They were more than what nearly occurred behind the tree at the park. They were more about what she found when she returned Cameron's clothes to John's room.

John looked very upset. It seemed every step forward was met with two backwards. Now there was another layer of mystery to Cameron's disappearance.

"I don't know how much more of this I can take." John said.

His statement seemed to reaffirm Allison's fears.

John was very frustrated about everything.

Vanna and Allison lived most of their lives in a Skynet future. They knew people could actually take a lot. People came and went all the time. People died and disappeared all of the time. There was no way to plan for any real future, for anyone.

"Life goes on, John." Allison said. "You take each day, one at a time."

Vanna nodded. Sometimes even a day seemed like it was too long to plan for.

"Sometimes you need to take each minute, one at a time." Vanna said.

John was aware they'd suffered much more than he ever had. They both lived with death, and being separated for a long time from the one they loved. It still didn't help the way he felt. Maybe he was being selfish. He just didn't know which direction to turn sometimes. It seemed as if every direction was the wrong direction.

"It seems like when nothing can get worse, it does." John said.

Vanna and Allison knew where John was coming from. They also knew it could be worse. Experience taught them no matter how bad it was at times, it could always get worse.

"John, I know it seems everything is working against us." Vanna said. "We've delayed Judgment Day. It means so far we've saved billions of lives. It has to count for something. Millions more people have been born. Millions of people have fallen in love. Millions of lovers have been married. We're making a difference. If Skynet can't take over, we win. We ARE winning."

Allison mostly agreed with Vanna. She also knew Skynet didn't need to take over. It could still destroy a lot of things, and kill a lot of people, and not have control. It could be the Joker, instead of the King. The bottom line was, the Resistance made a difference.

"Our accomplishments, YOUR accomplishments, have all made a difference." Allison said. "It is something very important, even if sometimes it may not seem like it. It still is."

John was very unsure. He felt lost in what could happen, and what already happened. It just seemed like a no-win situation.

Vanna reflected on how much worse for her it was after Judgment Day. Her parents were dead, and everything was destroyed. It was hard to find any food. There were always men who would find her, and 'hold her down', after her clothes were ripped off…. She felt it was something very important. She thought about her younger self, Savannah.

"When I was Savannah's age, it was already Hell for me. Look at her play. THAT means something to me." Vanna said. "John Henry has stockpiled weapons caches around the area and nation. We'll be ready to fight as humans if we have to. If we haven't lost, then we're winning."

Vanna went over and hugged Savannah. She was very grateful Savannah was still a girl. She'd been forced to become a 'woman' long before the age Savannah was now. She would do whatever she needed to do to prevent those same things from ever happening to Savannah. Once was enough. She went off to play with her.

Allison watched Vanna and Savannah go off together. She knew the fears Vanna felt. She felt them too. She hadn't experienced or endured as many things as Vanna needed to do. The fact Vanna did some of them for her, was never far from the front of her mind.

"John, Vanna suffered much worse than me. She sacrificed for me. It's a debt I'll never be able to repay." Allison said. "When I was older, as a young teenager, I found her again. They would dump the daily dead in the 'burn pile'. It was one way to try to keep the spread of disease down. I was there looking for clothes. I started to strip some ripped pants off a 'dead girl'. I saw the mark on her abdomen she took for me. I KNEW it was Vanna the instant I saw it. I didn't recognize her. She was barely alive and looked dead. They'd left her for dead. She was filthy, and her hair was dark with mud. I never would have recognized her if it wasn't for the scar."

Allison paused for a moment as she relived the event, as well as the events which preceded it, and followed it.

"When I saw the 'mark', I drug her out of the 'dead pile'." Allison continued. "I nursed her back to health. I gave her all my rations, ALL of them. Kyle and Derek helped me. It took months to bring her 'back'. I never left her side from that day, until John Henry took her away. I'll never leave her side again, ever. I gave her all my food and water whenever we had any. I survived on the smallest scraps to provide for her. Kyle and Derek shared their rations with me so I wouldn't die. I took no more than enough to stay alive, barely. I remember the day she first spoke again. She looked at me and smiled. She said my name. She remembered me! 'Allison', was all Vanna said. I cried and held on to her, John. I wanted her to get better. I wanted her to live. Every day I loved her more and more."

Allison was filled with emotion as she remembered it all. It was very traumatic at the time. She remembered the words she told Vanna.

"'Savannah, I owe you so much. I owe you my life. I'm going to help you get better. I'm going to fix you.' I told her that and I loved her. John, this world we're in now is Paradise. No matter how messed up it seems, it's Paradise. Our Future was Hell." Allison said. "It was our lives. You were only there for a short time. You're not a female. You can't really understand. You don't know what was done to us. Vanna suffered the most."

Allison reflected on how Vanna could never tell her all the things which happened to her, and she needed to endure. She knew there were still things Vanna couldn't talk about. What unspeakable horrors were they? Just hearing what was done to Vanna, over and over, made her sick. What else was done to her? What kind of animals do people turn into? No wonder Skynet saw humans as the threat. They were. They were always a threat to themselves.

John could see the anguish Allison relived as she recounted some of the past. He felt a little selfish for worrying about his problems. He wasn't the only one in pain and who suffered. He wondered if he was making it all about him. It certainly wasn't his intent. Maybe he needed to wake up and look around.

"I'm sorry, Allison." John said. "I didn't want to seem insensitive. I always think back to Cameron. It's the 'not knowing' which eats away at me. It 'kills' me. How do you move on, when you don't even know which direction to look? I don't really know what to do anymore."

There were times when John felt so helpless. It would be different if he'd seen Cameron destroyed. She was just gone. There was only 'nothing'.

Allison knew the 'place' where John was at right now. She'd been there many times. She needed to endure and fight to go on. She did those things, and took what life threw at her. She watched others give up. It wasn't what she was ever going to do. She was going to do whatever it took to stay alive. If you're alive you can fight. If you're dead, it's over with.

"Sometimes you need to run as fast as you can until you can't move, and never look back." Allison said. "It's the only way to move forward. You can't let what you leave behind 'catch you'. If you do, you're back to where you were. You go from nowhere to nowhere', and everything seems worse. Life needs to move forward, not backwards."

John thought about everything from whatever happened last night, to what he experienced with Allison and Vanna today. It was earlier on before all the drama. Life was about choices. He needed to make some. He already had. He wanted to make sure they were all on the same page. It was for reasons which were for them as well. He didn't want them to feel like there were obligations to anyone. He knew Cameron put a lot of pressure on them before she 'left'. Everyone needed their own free will.

"Allison, today in the park, before all of the 'fireworks', I finally came to accept Cameron isn't coming back." John said. "I want to be with you, Allison. I've always wanted to be with you since I first saw you. I know it's because I saw 'Cameron' when I first looked at you. I've come to know you, both in the future, and in the present. Now it's time to make our own future…."

Allison felt her heart beat a little faster. It's what she wanted too. She could feel her body begin to respond. It was natural instinct. She wanted to make her position clear.

"I want the same thing, John. Not only for you and myself, I want it for Cameron too." Allison said. "We owe everything to her. She's my best friend. I would do anything for her, for Vanna, for you, or for US. I want to keep my promise to her. It's also for Vanna and myself. I have desires and wants too. We all have needs."

John was very glad to hear they were all on the same page, for the same reasons. There was another thing which troubled him about what happened today. It reminded him of when he once did something similar. It was equally questionable at the time. He did it to lure the Terminator away from Martin Bedell, and go after him. It was exactly what happened. It was the ultimate case of going from the frying pan, into the fire.

"It was a pretty brave, but foolish 'stunt' you pulled today." John said.

Allison didn't feel she had a choice at the time. Protecting the young Reese brothers was the only thing which mattered right then. She would do the same thing again, and not think twice about it.

"It was the right thing to do at the time. I understand now how Cameron can sacrifice so much. When it's the right thing to do, you do it." Allison said. "You know what needs to be done, and when you need to do it. The cards will show themselves as they fall."

John felt Allison's words, as much as he saw her presence. His bottled up feelings began to overflow. He needed Allison, and he needed her now. He moved over and embraced her. She felt so 'right' in his arms.

Allison felt what John felt, without knowing what he felt. They both felt the same thing.

"Like this, John, this is the right thing now." Allison said. "I can feel it."

John needed to accept the reality. Cameron should have been back long ago. He'd been told, over and over, she would have been back right after she left. One of the two Terminators who went with her should have been able to make it back. None of the three of them ever returned. It indicated a very grim prospect.

"I can feel it too, Allison. I can finally accept it." John said. "If Cameron was coming back, it would have been months ago."

Vanna returned to the area. She saw Allison and John embrace. She felt very hurt because they appeared to 'move ahead' without her.

Allison looked over at her. She held her arm open for her to join them. A smile blossomed on her face as he did. The three of them stood there as they embraced. They all knew and wanted what was about to happen. They all knew their lives were about to change forever. It was a change everyone wanted. It was the future Cameron wanted for them. It was the future they ALL wanted. They could share the pain and the joy. Their love would conquer all.

Savannah looked up and saw Allison and Vanna with John - HER John. She knew what she'd promised Cameron. She wanted to make her presence known by the three of them.

"Vanna, can you help me look pretty?" Savannah asked as she walked over.

Vanna smiled at her.

"Sure, sweetie, what's the occasion?" Vanna asked.

Savannah looked at the three of them as they embraced each other.

"I want to look pretty, so when I get bigger, John will want to marry me." Savannah said. "I'm going to be John's wife too."

Savannah looked at Vanna, then at Allison, and then at John. She looked each one of them in the face to show her conviction to what she said and believed.

"Then the four of us can live happily ever after." Savannah said.

Her statement took all of them by surprise, especially since they were on a very personal and delicate subject.

Vanna needed to think about the most recent development for a while. She walked off, hand in hand, with Savannah. She looked back at Allison and John. She felt tonight everything would change. Their lives were all about to take a new direction. Vanna smiled at what the future offered. She would need to move Savannah to the back burner for a few more years. She was aware where Cameron left her wedding dress.

John wanted to go over everything with Allison. It was time to set things into motion.

"Allison, before eight tonight, if you want to come to my room 'first', I would like you to do so." John said.

Allison still needed to think about her true love. Vanna needed to be a part of everything.

"What happens after eight?" Allison asked.

John wanted to make everything happen smoothly.

"I'll come to your room, with Vanna and you together." John said.

Allison could feel the love and commitment, even if it was unspoken. It was there. It seemed to her the initial encounters should be individual, rather than as a group.

"I want to share with Vanna and you, John. I love you both. I've wanted to be with you for so long. I may come alone, first. Let's wait and see what happens. Either way, tonight is the night." Allison said. "Everything changes tonight."

Allison moved to kiss John.

John was ready for her kiss. They'd been so close earlier.

Savannah looked back at John. She was the one with the wedding dress. It was time to give Allison a reminder as well. She'd already given one to Vanna. She ran up and grabbed Allison's hand and pulled her away. She offered up a lame excuse.

"Let's go play, Allison." Savannah said.

Savannah literally pulled Allison away from John.

Allison's hand slowly slipped from John's hand as her eyes pleaded.

"Tonight…." John said.

John stared into the distance. He knew he was about to surrender to himself, surrender to the future, and surrender to HIS future. He was about to surrender to what Cameron 'wanted'. She made it very clear for the three of them. It pained him greatly to need to let go of the past, before he could embrace the future.

"Goodbye, Cameron." John softly said as tears filled his eyes. "I'll always love you."

Closing monologue by Cameron:

Surrender

Events in our lives become mixed
As they are run through life's blender
There are moments of anguish and pain
As well of moments of joy and splendor

To the one we love in our heart
We express love affectionately and tender
There is always the deep rooted fear
We may error and become an offender

We want to be the only one
We worry about an unforeseen contender
We know our love is pure and true
Intruders are nothing more than a pretender

True love must be shared freely
Not something borrowed from a lender
We fear the day our love will be stamped
Unwanted - return to sender

To each other our dream
Is to create and engender
It will all happen for us
As we succumb to sweet surrender

Nobody