Chapter 97
Incinerated
Jim stepped over the row of broken bricks into the earthen part of the passageway.
"Give me a minute to see what I find." Jim said. "I hope it won't be a booby trap."
Bob would wait for a short time before he entered.
"Use caution." Bob said. "I'll be right behind you."
Jim could see the tunnel was only partially excavated. He wasn't sure why it needed to continue beyond where the ladder was at on the section they entered from. Was something else being planned?
The passageway became narrower and narrower. It made a ninety degree turn and stopped.
Bob followed Jim after thirty seconds. He was soon at the ninety degree turn.
"We will need to see if there's anything else in this direction on the surface." Jim said.
Bob thought it might be something less sinister.
"It could be a 'zigzag' to serve as a blast wall for the passageway." Bob said.
It was clear there was nothing more for them to see, or find where they were at.
"Let's go." Jim said.
They moved back through the passageway to the ladder.
Jim went up the ladder and carefully unbent the metal he bent earlier. He slowly opened the hatch and looked around. It was clear. He exited back to the surface.
Bob followed Jim out. He left a demolition charge behind. They blew the entrance closed. The dirt around it collapsed into it.
There was nothing in the direction the tunnel turned.
Bob and Jim took one more look around the area and left. There were always other leads to follow.
Allison, Vanna and Jesse passed by the commissary and were near the Command Center. They'd been alone together again. It was something which happened quite frequently. They enjoyed the company and pleasures they were able to offer each other. Their bond grew very strong the more they shared, both in and out of the bedroom. Their bond to each other, and their bond to Cameron was very powerful. Each of the three women loved Cameron like no other. She was everything to them. Their worlds revolved around Cameron. She was the focus of their lives.
They were very attuned to what Cameron wanted from each of them, or all of them together, for John. There was no guesswork about where Cameron wanted them. It was in John's bed. She wanted him to have companionship. She wanted it to be human. None of them could really understand it, but they were all ready to do her bidding and they would. They wanted to please Cameron more than they did John.
They didn't talk about their deep love and caring for Cameron much amongst each other. It seemed to spark some jealousy. It was something they didn't need. Cameron was 'off limits' to them and they knew it. They all still hoped one day she would share with them. They didn't have a problem sharing with each other in pairs, or all three of them together. They could end up in any combination at the drop of a hat.
They all hungered for each other the closer they became.
Jesse and Vanna both seemed to concentrate on Allison.
It was fine with Allison, but she feared she was 'Cameron' most of the time to both Vanna and Jesse. They both were able to get her to where she wanted to go and keep her there for longer than she'd previously experienced with Vanna before in the past, the future. It was a new pleasure in itself.
As they neared the Command Center they heard the heated exchange going on between John Henry and Cameron. They were unsure what the beef was. They came to investigate and support Cameron. All three of them were shocked at what they found. It was unbelievable. Cameron needed help, fast.
All three acted as one. It just happened. Each one was willing to sacrifice for Cameron. They didn't know if they could stop her by reasoning with her or not. She was holding a live and armed Thermite grenade. There was only one way to make a point and hopefully stop her. It was to sacrifice themselves.
Jesse was the first to act. There was no hesitation on her part. It put her in mortal danger.
"Then I'll burn as well." Jesse said as she walked up and stood alongside Cameron.
Vanna was right behind Jesse. She looked at Cameron's face as she joined her.
"If you chose to 'go', I chose to 'go' with you." Vanna said as she walked up on Cameron's other side.
Allison fearlessly moved forward. She looked into Cameron's eyes as she spoke.
"We will all burn together then." Allison said as she faced Cameron and hugged her.
She pulled her body right up against Cameron's and held the hug. The armed Thermite grenade was tight between them.
Allison and Cameron's eyes were locked as they stood face to face with 'death' pressed tightly between them.
Cameron knew the girls wouldn't back down at this point. They made it clear to her.
John Henry looked around and found the pin for the Thermite grenade. He saw it off to the side.
The girls didn't know how to address the issue, other than to say what they felt and believed. They all spoke the truth.
"Cameron, I love you, we all love you, just the way you are." Allison said.
Vanna looked at Cameron. She'd loved Cameron since she was a program on a server.
"Cameron, you mean more to us, ALL of us, than we do to ourselves." Vanna said.
Jesse's life now had purpose with her love for Cameron.
"Without you, Cameron, we're nothing. I'm NOTHING." Jesse said. "I need you. We need you."
Cameron began to glitch all over.
"Step back. I MUST do this." Cameron said. "PLEASE, let me 'GO'."
The three women pressed themselves against her body.
"NO!" The three women said in unison.
They all held Cameron tighter.
Cameron tried to make them understand how she felt.
"I'm something abominable. I've failed to restore this timeline to its proper order. I've distorted the 'Natural Order'." Cameron said. "I'm the cancer infecting it. I'm the cancer which infects every timeline. I'm the constant for destruction."
The three girls weren't about to back down. It was now up to Cameron to decide all four of their fates. Whatever action she chose for herself, she chose for the girls as well. Their lives were literally in her hands. She was the one who held the armed Thermite grenade.
"Then it ends for all of us, together." Vanna said. "You're the 'decider', Cameron."
Allison held Cameron tighter.
"Do what you must." Allison said. "Your choice is our choice."
Jesse didn't see a future without Cameron.
"We'll 'go' with you." Jesse said.
Cameron wanted to stop but she couldn't. It was time to 'go'.
John Henry saw Cameron was about to release the spoon. It was happening. He snatched up the pin for the Thermite grenade from the floor. He held it out to Cameron. Things would calm down considerably if she disarmed the grenade and made it 'safe' again. He needed to take action to save the girls. There was one way to defuse the entire situation. It was to give Cameron what she wanted.
"I'll do as you request." John Henry blurted out. "Please put the pin back in. I'll erase your chip. I'll terminate you. Please don't hurt the girls. John will need them."
The three girls listened in shock….
What?
Terminate Cameron?
Erase her chip?
Cameron hesitated. Freedom was so close…. She didn't need to wait for her chip to be erased. She could burn it now.
John Henry could see Cameron was going to do it. He tried again to reason with her for John's future. He needed to appeal to Cameron's original mission from Future John.
"The GIRLS, Cameron, John will need them." John Henry said. "It's the "Natural Order'."
The girls would do whatever Cameron wanted. It seemed she chose termination for all four of them.
"Time to go…." Cameron said.
Earlier:
John found Sarah and Kyle. He needed to talk to them. He wanted some help or guidance.
"Mom, I don't know what to do. I'm losing her." John said.
John was sure he already had. It seemed Cameron wanted to be anywhere else but there.
Sarah didn't feel like she was qualified to answer about what John said, other than to relate her own experiences. Every situation was different to some degree. It was more than a matter of perspective. There were many moving parts to any relationship.
"I would say in a 'conventional relationship', things happen. People drift apart, they grow apart. They don't grow closer. Seldom do people continue together on the same path." Sarah said. "It happens…. It's how life and relationships work."
Kyle was aware of the limitations in the nature of John's relationship.
"There's nothing to bind you two together as there can be in a 'traditional relationship'." Kyle said as he touched Sarah's mid section.
Sarah placed her hand over Kyle's hand and smiled.
John noticed the interaction, but said nothing. It seemed to relate back to an earlier discussion with Kyle. He knew there was always more in play than met the eye. He needed to refocus on his current situation.
"Why can't love, caring, and sharing be enough?" John asked.
Sarah knew everyone kept growing inside. What may have started out as 'good enough', could soon erode into 'not good enough'. People often didn't want to show their true colors for fear of being rejected. At some point in time, their true colors always came out.
"Sometimes someone needs 'more' than the other can provide." Sarah said.
Kyle was familiar with the confusion and uncertainty of the future. Circumstances could place people together, who weren't normally compatible. When they tried to think of a future, there wasn't often one there for them with each other. It seemed the more they knew about each other, the less they liked.
"Sometimes one, or both, of the people don't know what they really want." Kyle added.
Sarah looked over at Kyle. She thought about the way her involvement with Kyle started. It was with Future Kyle. She was in a different place now with a different version of Kyle. It took a long time to go from there, to where she was at now.
"Sometimes it takes twenty years to get what you want." Sarah said.
Kyle knew there was a harsher side too. Some things remained impossible. No matter how much things were manipulated, they would always revert back to the way they were in some fashion. Few could actually get what they wanted, especially when they wanted it.
"John, sometimes you never do…." Kyle said. "There can be no peace or resolution."
Sarah summed up the painful reality of love. It made her uncomfortable to actually say it, even if she knew it was true.
"Sometimes if you really love someone, you need to let them 'go'." Sarah said. "Love is about sacrifice. If you really love someone, you put their well being and desires before your own."
John could see he was on the road to 'nowhere'. He understood and appreciated his parents' candor. He was painfully aware of all the sacrifices, trials, and tribulations his mother needed to endure to protect him growing up. It appeared sometimes the only way out, was there was no way out.
Derek opened his eyes and looked at the ceiling. He quickly remembered he was in a bed. He looked over. Riley looked back at him.
Earlier they shared wildly with each other a few times.
Riley watched Derek as he drifted off earlier. Now he was awake.
"You took a short nap." Riley said.
Derek said nothing. He now stared at the ceiling. His thoughts were a million miles away.
Riley knew he was thinking about someone else. It left her with a slightly unpleasant feeling. Since they'd been together, she better find out where she stood, or if she'd just been 'used'. It wouldn't be the first time. She strongly doubted it would be the last time either. She might just as well cut to the chase.
"What's her name?" Riley asked.
Derek still stared at the ceiling. There were dozens of thoughts cascading around his mind. The answer to Riley's question was easy. Everything else behind it wasn't.
"Jesse…." Derek said.
Riley was afraid of it. She needed to know which direction things were going to go. Sometimes there was an opening, most of the time there wasn't. She needed to know a little more.
"Do you love her?" Riley asked.
Derek didn't even need to think about it. Even with all of her faults and shortcomings, Jesse was always able to 'reach' him, even if he couldn't reach her. The answer was easy.
"Yes." Derek said.
Riley could feel some hesitation. It made her wonder what else, or who else, was involved. Very few things in relationships were 'black and white'. She knew there was more to the story.
"But….?" Riley asked.
Derek looked over at Riley. He could only tell her the truth, no matter how painful it was to him.
"She's moved on and left me behind." Derek said.
Riley felt a forced change could have some merit. She knew inaction was usually the worst option.
"A closed door, can lead to an open one." Riley said. "It happens. You're here now with me."
Derek looked at her again. He couldn't help but like everything he saw and experienced. He wasn't sure if it was because she was so different from Jesse or not. Jesse could be very crude at times. Riley seemed as if she was much sweeter. He figured it was because she hadn't abused as much.
"Yes, I am. You're beautiful." Derek said.
Riley smiled. She sensed an opportunity on several levels. It was more than about the mission now. There was a personal connection. It seemed to be real, even if it was new. She knew things needed to start somewhere.
"Let me help you move on." Riley said. "I might be a passing ship in the night, or a rock the lighthouse is built on."
Derek wondered where it would lead. He wasn't getting any younger. Someone from the future would understand him better. He didn't believe he could ever get into a workable relationship with someone from the past, the present. They wouldn't be able to understand him. He wanted to lay down a few rules and conditions. If they were rejected from the start, so be it.
"Would you want to help me move on?" Derek asked. "If we do 'this', I want 'everything'."
Riley was ready for a little more out of life. Maybe it was the open door she needed for herself.
"I have what you want." Riley said. "You have what I need…."
Derek was worried there may be more to her story.
"What about you? Is there anyone?" Derek asked. "I know a lot of different things happened where we came from. Most of them were not pleasant. Many of them came with strings."
Riley looked at Derek for a long moment. The reality of the future was ugly. She often felt she wasn't in control of her life. She felt she was never in control of her body when it came to men. She was ashamed of the things done to her. They weren't anything she wanted, the way they were done. She figured it was best to get it out into the open now.
"There never was a choice until NOW." Riley said. "Anything before was 'taken' from me by force. It happened a lot."
Derek nodded. He understood the fate of all females in the future. It happened to ALL of them at some point. It just happened to some of them more than others. He knew it was why they often found comfort in each other.
"I'm sorry." Derek said. "I do understand. It's how life was in the future. Some people could be very self-centered and cruel. Other people didn't matter to them. It was only what they wanted which mattered."
Riley didn't think it made anything easier. Even if it was the way it was, it isn't the way it should have been.
"It was." Riley said.
Derek wanted to make sure everything was clear. If he was going to try to build a future, he wanted to make sure it would be workable. When others were involved, it never was.
"So it's just us then?" Derek asked.
Riley felt it was a two way street. She wanted the same assurance as well.
"It will be just us. There can't be any 'Jesse' either." Riley said. "You need to make a choice and let her go. When three people are involved, it is always the recipe for disaster."
Derek was ready to move his life forward. He'd suffered enough heartache.
"It's a deal." Derek said. "Let's get dressed and go. I want to show you our operation. You're going to be part of the team. You're going to be part of the Resistance here."
Riley kissed him. She wanted her life to have purpose. She wanted to have a life. What Derek offered, seemed to be what she needed in multiple ways. She made a choice to go to the past. It was time to make another choice to move her life forward.
"I'll follow you anywhere." Riley said.
Cameron gave the Thermite grenade to John Henry. He put the pin back in. One by one the girls released her.
She looked at John Henry. She looked at the Thermite grenade he now held.
"You will do as you've promised." Cameron said.
John Henry understood the implication. Cameron would continue where she just left off with the Thermite grenade.
The group headed for the lab.
Cameron was satisfied her existence would end soon.
The three women begged and pleaded with her not to do it.
Vanna felt there was a missing component to everything which was occurring.
"Where's John in all of this?" Vanna asked.
The girls all looked around.
John Henry knew the specifics.
"John is with Sarah and Kyle. Derek isn't around." John Henry stated.
Things seemed to happen fast.
Cameron climbed onto the work bench.
Allison couldn't believe what was about to occur.
"You can't do this, John Henry, you can't." Allison pleaded.
John Henry didn't feel there was a choice. He'd made an agreement to stop Cameron from terminating all four of them. All he could do is point out the obvious and inevitable.
"Do you wish to see her burn?" John Henry asked.
The girls didn't even need to think about it. It wasn't an option under any conditions.
"No." The three girls said.
John Henry set down the Thermite grenade he took from Cameron.
"What choice do we have then?" John Henry asked.
Jesse held onto Cameron. The tears ran down her face as she pleaded with her not to do it.
Vanna broke down. She was unable to even speak any longer. The grief overwhelmed her. Her crying physically affected her.
Allison stood her ground. She was going to prevent it, no matter what she needed to do.
"I won't allow this." Allison said.
Cameron looked at Allison and smiled faintly as she touched her cheek.
"It's my wish." Cameron said. "I want my one wish."
Allison knew what Cameron's one wish was. It was never to have been built. It was the last two lines in her first poem before she 'humanized' it at John's suggestion. She memorized it. She'd read it over and over. She could see it. She could feel it.
Outsider
When I look in the mirror
I don't like what I see
When I look inside of myself
I don't like what I can't be
I hate what I am
I hate what I'm not
I hate everything about myself
I guess it covers a lot
I feel so small
It's like I don't exist
Useless and worthless
Nothing on which to subsist
I'm an outsider
Always on the outside looking in
There's so much inside of me
To want to exist isn't a sin
From this torment there's no escape
My CPU and power cell are filled with guilt
If I had only one wish it would be
Never to have been built
Cameron
Allison knew it was the only poem she ever signed with her name, 'Cameron'. It was only in the poems she printed for Vanna. It was her first poem. It was her true wish.
She needed to think fast. She tried to buy time. An idea popped into her head.
"We can go back to the future, YOUR future. We can prevent Your Allison from being captured." Allison said. "It means you'll never be built…."
YES. Cameron sat up. It was her one wish, 'never to have been built'.
"It's what I want." Cameron said. "I'll do it. I'm going back to the future."
"I will go with you."
"So will I."
"I will too."
John Henry thought it may be a worse idea. It would create a new timeline.
"This is insanity." John Henry said.
Cameron often wondered if she was insane. Maybe she really was.
"No. It's what I want. I want to keep from being built. I never want to have existed. If…." Cameron paused and then continued. "If I don't exist. Therefore I am not…."
Closing monologue by Cameron:
Abominable
Behind the daily mask of life
I must be something hideous
What is meant as genuine support
Is wrongfully seen as insidious
I accept the reality of the situation
Now or past need not be fastidious
I mean not to judge, hurt or belittle
My mind open, accepting, not invidious
Each failure or shortcoming on my part
Cuts me deep to the very brittle bone
I would quickly replace myself if possible
With a fresh minded unknowing clone
Truncating the abominable nowhere journey
Darkness unending into the eternal unknown
For my transgressions I must perpetually atone
My heart, mind and soul forever always alone
Nobody