Chapter 166

Dishonest

Sarah arrived at the park with Jan, Bob, and Jim. The two Terminators immediately scanned the area for threats.

"Everything looks clear." Bob said.

Sarah thought it was a little overkill for the park. She was aware there were other incidents which happened in parks before. She knew no place was safe. There were some places which might be safer than others.

"I'm going to take Jan under the trees." Sarah said. "I'd like to go for a run later on. I haven't gotten out as much as I would like to recently. My hands have been a little full at times."

Jim looked down at Jan. He knew small children were a lot of work.

"Being exposed to the sunlight is a good thing for both of you." Jim said. "It's a good source of Vitamin D."

Sarah learned from experience too much sunlight could be bad as well. She remembered seeing some older women before with skin which looked like leather on their chest area. Other ones had brown spots. What made it all contrast was the fact when they were without a top on, she could see the area normally covered by a bra, or bikini top, was milky white and unblemished. The sun is what damaged the skin on the women. She knew melanoma could be caused as well. Her previous diagnosis of 'dying from cancer' was never too far in the back of her mind.

"I know not to overdo it." Sarah said. "We both have sunscreen on to make sure we don't."

Bob could see Sarah wanted to get her exercise in.

"I can wait here with Jan if you want to get started." Bob said. "I think I can entertain her."

Sarah was aware a Terminator could make a number of different sounds. She wondered if Bob would make a variety of animal sounds for Jan.

"I'd appreciate it if you did." Sarah said. "I know she's cute to look at. Keep track of what's around you at all times."

Bob felt he could be vigilant.

"Affirmative…." Bob said.

Jim would go with Sarah on her run.

"I can run either in front of you or behind you." Jim said. "I don't want to set the pace for you. Maybe I'll just follow you."

Sarah didn't think it was anything too different than she did before.

"Let's get started." Sarah said.

Sarah took off at a mild pace. Jim followed behind her. He stayed close enough where he could reach her in about ten seconds if it became necessary.

John Henry server, JH, started to intercept a few messages directed at 911 from the park. He was aware where they came from and what the reason was. He quickly notified Sarah of the situation as he stifled the calls.

Sarah was a little surprised to be contacted by John Henry's server. She laughed to herself about the nature of the calls a few people made. She paused and motioned for Jim to come up alongside her.

"I think you received the same message I did." Sarah said. "We will run together, side by side, instead of you following me. It seems some people took things the wrong way. They thought you were chasing me."

Jim understood the nature of the caller's concern

"I've experienced similar situations before." Jim said. "It appears some people have deep ingrained prejudices, or are governed by stereotypes."

Sarah felt humans actually possessed a number of shortcomings. She was far from perfect herself. She didn't have any prejudices though. Well, except maybe for Terminators until she got to know Cameron better, and the other Terminators in their group.

"It isn't too hard for people to prejudge other people, or machines, based on past experience." Sarah said. "Once someone realizes the true nature of someone else, there's nothing to worry about or fear."

Sarah and Jim continued their run through the park, side by side. No more 911 calls were received by JH.

There was a growing compulsion inside Cameron to 'come clean'. She didn't treat her friends as friends. She treated them as pawns and people to 'use'. Her actions were very goal-oriented. The way she carried them out was unscrupulous. There was little moral fabric in her make up. It didn't leave her with a pleasant feeling.

Cameron approached Allison. She needed to tell Allison she lied to her. It bothered her greatly she lied again. It was in her programming to be duplicitous to achieve her goals. It was all about winning – right?

Not THIS time. This time it was about doing the 'right thing'. Her earlier conversation with Savannah hung heavily over her. Savannah reminded her the 'right thing' counted more than achieving the goal.

She felt very conscientious about correcting her mistake.

There was a sense of relief as she prepared to speak.

"Allison, there's someth…." Cameron started.

Allison It's very disturbed by her earlier conversation with Cameron. It didn't seem her discussion of the events with Vanna helped any. She wanted to get something off her chest first. She cut Cameron off.

"Cameron." Allison interrupted. "I talked with Vanna and we will do it if it's the four of us together. We'll both be with John and you."

Allison was glad she got it out. It was a life changing decision and she'd just made it clear to Cameron. She quickly rendered if she should have been a little more specific about Cameron's involvement and inclusion in the 'deal'.

Cameron was more than a little surprised. What Allison said was everything she wanted. She wanted to be honest before the girls made a life altering choice of such an extreme magnitude It was time to come longer she delayed, the harder it would be.

"Allison, I wasn't hones…." Cameron started.

Allison needed to get everything out. She didn't want to get sidetracked. She didn't want to change her mind if it could be avoided. She cut Cameron off again.

"If we did it before, like you said we did, then we'll do it again. We decided last night." Allison interrupted. "I just wanted you to know that."

Cameron was taken aback. She was going to confess she hadn't been honest with Allison and lied to her. Now Allison just gave her what she wanted for so long. It was everything Future John wanted and programmed into her. It was for Allison and Vanna to be with John. It was to 'ready them' to replace her as it should be, as it was meant to be, and as it MUST be. It needed to be as it was, no, 'is' in the future. It was the 'Natural Order'.

She wanted to finish what she started to say but couldn't right now. There was a massive internal conflict which raged inside of her. It was still not too late to 'take the win'. Not all victories were sweet. This would be a bitter victory built and predicated on a lie. It was more like a mountain of lies at this point.

Cameron thought back to her earlier conversation with Savannah again. Savannah believed in her. Savannah loved her. Savannah looked up to her. It was all very conflicting. She was a Terminator. A Terminator never stopped until the job was done. The job wasn't done she was sent to do. She remembered the look on Savannah's face as they spoke. Her internal discomfort grew even more.

It seemed both girls were flooded with thoughts about moving forward.

Allison wanted to be guilt free when they were with John. She needed to set down some rules and conditions. She didn't want anything to be awkward. She really didn't know what would happen going forward. She was sure Cameron would want to be the one in control. Maybe it would make everything easier if she was. They would simply be 'following orders'. She never wanted it to seem like they were going behind Cameron's back.

"Tell us when and where, and we'll be there. You'll never let yourself, or us, have any peace until we do this for you." Allison said. "BUT, you have to be there. We have to know you will allow this, and you won't change your mind. If you can watch John 'touch us', then we'll know. If you touch us, we'll know. We have to know. I HAVE TO KNOW."

Cameron wanted to say she lied to Allison. In fact she started to before Allison blurted out what she said. Now she was torn. She won, but it was with a lie, another lie. It seemed to be something she did more and more. She always won, but at what cost? Was it the cost of the lives of her best friends, John's baby and even herself?

She spoke with moral certitude. It was time to do the right thing. Things needed to be corrected before anything moved forward, even if it prevented it from moving forward after the truth. It was time. She faced Allison.

"Allison, I lied." Cameron said.

Cameron's statement caught Allison off guard. It was about the last thing she expected to hear.

"What?" Allison asked.

There was a conscientious feeling which overwhelmed Cameron. She needed to make her transgression clear. She needed to own the lie. She needed to own the deceit.

"I lied to you. I lie all the time." Cameron confessed. "I can't help it. It just happens."

Allison knew she cut Cameron off twice. Cameron hadn't said much. Maybe she missed something.

"You lied about what?" Allison asked a little worried.

Cameron faced Allison. She wasn't content with being fallacious to Allison. She wanted to say, everything.

"I lied about how you, your Duplicate, became pregnant." Cameron confessed.

Allison was confused. She was able to verify Duplicate Allison was pregnant. She asked Kyle, and Derek. There was no doubt about it.

"What?" Allison asked. "She was pregnant…."

Sarah, Riley and John Henry all confirmed Duplicate Allison was pregnant as well. They didn't know the specifics, they did know the results.

Cameron was dissatisfied with her own duplicitous nature. It was time to layout what really happened.

"It was done without love making, or even sex." Cameron said. "It was an artificial conception. Just the genetic material was used. It wasn't administered in the traditional way. Duplicate Vanna was the one who actually impregnated Duplicate Allison with the procedure."

There, she came clean. Cameron felt better, but not by much. She thought it would be more of a relief than it was. It wasn't.

Allison looked at her. She was sure there'd been an error on Cameron's part. This didn't sound like how it would be done. She would want a traditional conception for herself. It was the way it was meant to be done. There must be a mistake.

"Did you review your files?" Allison asked. "Maybe some files were corrupted or incomplete. They were transferred from Duplicate Cameron on Holly's chip."

Cameron could see Allison offered her 'a way out'. She wanted her deceitfulness and dishonesty exposed for what it was. It was time to 'pay the piper' and 'face the music'. It was time to make clear what she really was. It was a liar. She briefly reflected lying was worse than stealing. When you lied to someone, you stole someone's trust. Trust was something more valuable than any material things. She wanted Allison to see her true nature.

"NO, I lied to you from the start." Cameron said. "I'm a liar. I'm ashamed I lied to you. Allison, please forgive me. I'm not a good person. I'm 'evil'."

Allison needed to think about what Cameron did earlier and what she did now after she agreed to do what Cameron wanted. It made her wonder what it actually 'cost' Cameron inside to come clean.

"I don't know what to say. You didn't have to tell me the truth. I would never have known." Allison said. "Thank you for being honest with me."

Cameron teared up. She'd just thrown away her 'dream' for John, Allison, and Vanna to be together. She failed at her mission. She was a failure.

Allison came to Cameron. She didn't like to see Cameron 'hurt' like this. She smiled at Cameron and touched her cheeks as she wiped the tears away.

"I forgive you, Cameron." Allison said. "I KNOW we both know it's what you want for John and us. WE KNOW IT."

Allison's graciousness only seemed to cause Cameron additional pain inside of her. She wanted to make Allison understand her true nature.

"I'm sorry I tried to manipulate you. I'm not a good person. In fact I'm not a person at all. I'm a machine. I'm a scary robot. I'm a very scary robot, and a cancer, from the future." Cameron got out between sobs.

Allison tried to think of a reason Cameron was 'confused' about it. There must be some other explanation. She didn't see Cameron at all like she just depicted herself. She didn't want Cameron to blame herself for what other versions of them went through.

"Cameron, you were with us when all this happened with our Duplicates. It was easy to mix it up. None of us were there." Allison said as she tried to comfort her. "Maybe some files were misplaced and only found now. I don't think it's anything to worry about or dwell on. I don't want you to."

Allison's words dug deep into Cameron. She didn't want an 'easy out'. She wanted the truth known. She wanted to expose her own dishonesty, as well as worthlessness.

"NO. I LIED. I knew I was lying. I did it to coerce you and manipulate you. I lied to get my way. I lied to win. I'm not worthy of your friendship. I've deceived you." Cameron sobbed. "I KNEW what I was doing. I knew it was wrong, and I did it anyway."

Allison wiped some more tears away from Cameron's cheeks.

"Do you feel 'bad' about it?" Allison asked. "I mean what you did?"

Cameron felt worse than 'bad'. She felt terrible and was plagued with guilt. Her earlier conversation with Savannah weighed heavily on her.

"YES, it's why I told you. I started to tell you before you interrupted me. I was trying to do the right thing. I don't always need to win." Cameron said. "I don't want to lie to the people I love. I need to play fair. I need to be a better perso… - machine."

Allison viewed what Cameron did just now as strength. It took courage to do it. It took an honest person to do it.

"Isn't it what you just did? You tried to be a better person. To admit your mistake freely, especially after you got what you wanted shows integrity. It takes a very big 'person' to do it." Allison said. "You came clean when you didn't need to. It says something about your character."

Cameron only felt ashamed of herself.

"I'm unworthy." Cameron said.

Cameron looked heart broken to Allison. It was time for her to reach out and 'give back'.

"Cameron, I love you as much as I always have. No, I love you more for being honest. I love you more for thinking about Vanna and me." Allison said. "I know it's hardwired into you to do what you THINK needs to be done. I know you believe you're protecting John and the future. You're a better and stronger person for telling the truth, even if you don't 'win'. You did the right thing and it's more important."

Allison gave Cameron a warm hug, and a soft kiss, on her cheek.

Cameron felt confused. It was a loving gesture from Allison. Allison should hate her now. Allison should hate her for trying to manipulate her.

"You don't 'hate' me?" Cameron asked.

Hate was the farthest thing away in Allison's mind when she thought of Cameron.

"Hate you? I LOVE you, Cameron." Allison said. "I LOVE YOU."

Cameron felt so ashamed.

Allison wanted to make her position clear.

"Cameron, if you weren't with John, and I wasn't with Vanna, I would want to be with you. I can think of no finer PERSON in this world than you." Allison said.

Cameron needed to hear Allison's words so much. She was a little worried maybe Allison just 'said' them. Maybe Allison thought she would 'hurt' her 'again'. She needed to remember what she was going to do to Future Allison originally. She was going to terminate her. She wasn't sure if it was because she lied to her or not. Somehow if it was because she lied, it made what she did to Allison even worse.

"Really?" Cameron asked. "Do you really mean it?"

Allison placed Cameron's hand on her neck and looked her in the eyes. She wanted Cameron to know it was the truth.

"I do." Allison said. "I love you, Cameron."

Everything made Cameron flashback a little.

"When I went back to the future and saved My Allison, Future Allison. I loved her, Allison." Cameron said. "The months we spent together made me love her as I knew her more and more everyday. I wanted to stay in the future with her. I didn't want to give her back to Future John. I know she loved me too. I did everything I could to make her a better person and fix her health. I tried to tell myself I did it for Future John, but I did it because I loved her. I love you just as much, Allison. You're what John needs, not me. It's why it broke my heart to gave My Allison back to Future John. I love every Allison I know. Both of you are special people. Allison, can you ever forgive me for 'killing you'? I've killed you twice, once by my own hand, and once by my foolishness. I killed your baby, Allison. It was my fault. Can you ever forgive me?"

Allison wanted to point out it was Duplicate Cameron, not her, who was responsible for the baby and Duplicate Allison's demise. Cameron also went back to the future and prevented Future Cameron from killing Future Allison. The Cameron here now with her wasn't responsible for any 'Allison's death'. She decided to move the discussion forward instead.

"Cameron, I'll always forgive you. It's YOU who needs to forgive yourself. It's what is killing you and tearing yourself apart. You never let anything go. You blame yourself for everything that goes wrong. Everyone feels like you sometimes. It is just not ALL the time like you do. I've read your poems. I've felt the same way many times but I try to move on. I try to move forward." Allison said as she hugged Cameron. "Look how much you've helped everybody here, even Riley. There's NOBODY here who's loved more than you by humans or machines. That's even with a few 'mistakes' here and there. As humans, we all make mistakes and lie sometimes. It's just the way it is. Not all of it is malicious. You're everything to everyone. There's no other like you."

Allison looked Cameron right in her eyes.

"I love you, Cameron." Allison said as she left her player with Cameron.

'California Dreamin'' by 'The Mamas And The Papas', was the tune which started to play.

Allison left Cameron and went straight back to her room. She was very moved with what Cameron had just done and with her honesty.

Sitting on her dresser was a new Smith and Wesson Model 66. Cameron hand polished it to a mirror finish. There were six nickel plated casings loaded with Coltan projectiles.

"I love you, Cameron." Allison said softly as she cried. "I LOVE YOU."

Closing monologue by Cameron:

Dishonest

They don't always like the way I do things

I may be deliberately
Deceptive and duplicitous
The information I dispense
May be somewhat fallacious

The actions I take
Can be audacious
My dealings with others
May seem ungracious

To break down personal barriers
I may be flirtatious
The next minute
I can become contentious

To get things done
I must be unscrupulous
Things can't bother me
As I act without feeling conscientious

When we interact
I may be contrarious
I'm dishonest as necessary
I can be very vicious

They don't always like the way I do things

Nobody