I know the notifications are still buggered on this site, so in case you missed it, I uploaded an extra chapter last weekend. Just to ensure no one misses anything!

ROBYN POV

I stared at the ceiling, noise rumbling all around. My mind reeled. It tried to follow what had just happened. Was it a nightmare? Was I about to be woken up by an irritated Mikasa again? No. No it really had happened. My Captain had come back, and he had tried to kill me.

I blinked.

My mind tried to retrace what had happened.

My Captain had returned. He rode through the gates and I dared to breathe properly for the first time in six months. I ran downstairs. My heart was in my mouth, tears brewing in my eyes.

Finally, he was home.

The doors had creaked open as me and Eren joined the back of the crowd. We stood and listened to the welcome Levi received. The voices gushed over his return, and of course he gave quick, curt responses. It all sounded so normal. He sounded healthy. My heart ached. The crowd thinned as he and the Commander made their way through. I shivered and shuffled to hide myself a little behind Eren. The crowd continued to thin. I checked my Captain's appearance, for signs of strain, or injury. But no. He looked good. Healthy. There were shadows of scaring by his collar, but it wasn't clear if they were new or not.

Then I'd suddenly been afraid. Suddenly wishing the crowd would swell to 1000 people.

What would I say to him? What would he say to me? Six months of waiting, wondering and fearing the worst were bubbling over in my mind, choking my throat. How the hell would I even look Levi in the eye? I had been free while he was captured. Shit. Okay breathe. Just breathe. It was Levi, the man I loved, the man I had trusted so deeply, that I had said yes to as he sunk to one knee. I could do this. One step at a time. We might be happy again.

Eren had shaken Levi's hand, welcoming him back with sincere thanks. Seemed like Eren was relieved, likely glad to see this reunion. But something twinged at the back of my mind, an echo of a sensation. I shivered. Warning. This was a bad idea. Get out of there. This isn't going to go well… What?

Eren turned to me with a grin, his arm outstretched as he revealed me to Levi. "Robyn has been so wor—"

"Bitch!" Levi lunged.

Instinct dragged me back, dodging the desperate reach for my throat. Clumsy. Not his usual style, but of course he did have his speed, so the second attempt stuck. My mind reeled. What? Again instinct won out. I wriggled. I struggled. My nails raked his hands, trying to dislodge the grip cutting off my air.

Crushing. Choking. Strangling.

We fell to the ground in a heap.

I'd expected anger, malice, even fury; but this went beyond. My head smacked off the ground. He squeezed. And as I finally took in the look on his face, my body went numb. My struggling stopped. What could I do when he was looking at me like that? Like he hated me. Like I had destroyed everything he held dear. I was his enemy. My hands fell away from his. I just stared into his enraged eyes, burning with loathing and determination. He was desperate to kill me. Yet I was paralysed by confusion – and a dash of acceptance. The Commander and Eren tried to get him off me. There was so much hate burning in those silver eyes.

I'd never thought he'd look at me like that – how foolish of me.

"You killed them!" Levi snarled. "You monster. It was all you!" He growled, his grip failing as more hands hauled him away. It can't have been more than a couple of seconds he had held onto me. I stared up at the ceiling. He continued to snarl as he was taken to the cells, but the words became hard to make out. Ringing filled my ears.

Keza appeared above me. When had she got here? Oh well…

Nope, it wasn't a dream.

That had really happened. Levi had tried to kill me.

Her big beautiful eyes were wide as she ran a hand over my forehead, and then over my throat. I flinched at the already painful bruising. But I could breathe fairly normally – somehow he hadn't crushed my throat. Maybe something had held him back? Then I remembered that look. Something that would have suited the venomous nature of Vincent far more than my Captain. I flinched. No, Levi just hadn't had enough time. Maybe? They had hauled him away too quickly and he was left raging at the world because I was still living.

Keza sat me up slowly. The crowd remained, though they had moved back, creating a ring of space around us. Like an arena. How odd. Keza wasn't trying to speak to me yet, she was just keeping her hands on my arms gently, coaxing me upright and then to my feet. Bit by bit. Easy does it. Don't rush. And she led me through the staring faces towards the mess hall, shooing any that didn't move quick enough. The mess hall was almost empty. But she just continued to shoo, getting rid of the convicts still clearing up breakfast, and any straggling troops. I stared ahead. Numb. Soon enough we were alone. The doors clanged shut. It echoed. Had it always echoed? I guess so.

She sat me down, collected a glass of water, and rubbed my back. She knew how to ease my mind when my shadows loomed, she knew how to talk me out of a panic, but this was new. I think it might have been one of the very few times that Keza was lost for words. I'd have loved to help but… It was new for me too. Levi. He hated me. He wanted me dead. The man I love, the man I'd been missing and feeling endless guilt over for six months, had just tried to murder me. What the hell was this world? Just as cruel as it always had been I guess. There just wasn't room for me to ignore it right now.

But it was fine. I… I could handle this.

I turned to her. "He's back."

She looked away as her bottom lip wobbled. "I'm so sorry, honey."

"Don't be." I said quietly, tracing a finger round the cool rim of the glass. For the first time in half a year I could appreciate the calm within the quiet. It wasn't empty, or haunting. It was just there. Calmly quiet beside me. I sipped the water carefully, and smiled.

"What's going on in that backwards brain, Numbnuts?" She tucked my hair behind my ear.

I continued feeling the smoothness of the glass. "He's alive."

"Okay…"

"The fight for humanity has its strongest soldier back. The regiment has its finest captain back… He's alive."

The guilt remained but it wasn't crushing. The lid on my heart loosened. I breathed deeper. The unknowns were still plentiful, and I still had no real idea what had happened during captivity, but I knew one thing for certain, Levi was alive. And he had come home to the Scouts. Even if not to me.

Her hand landed on my knee. "Yeah… And you've had your heart ripped out."

That, I couldn't deny. Beside the calm quiet, and the warmth of knowing he was alive and fairly healthy, was the next part. The ragged edges, the splinters, the gaping wound where my heart used to be. Where hope had begun to grow oh-so-foolishly. Now, nothing grew. It was empty, aching, bleeding out. But I had endured that wound before. Vincent had seen to that. Experience was on my side, and in that moment I was immensely grateful. Without it, I'd probably be a mess on the floor, gasping, clutching my hollowed chest, trying to hold in the pain. But no. Now I could accept it was there, feel it, know it. And endure.

I sipped the water. "In the grand scheme of things, one broken heart is hardly the issue."

"Bugger the grand scheme."

"I can deal with this. He's alive, and that helps." I laughed, unable to fully voice how much it helped to simply know something. Fair enough, I now knew he hated me, and that he wanted me dead for what I'd done to him, but it was better than flying blind.

Keza sighed. "What the hell was he talking about anyway?"

"I don't know. Maybe the Commander will get some sense out of him. Maybe she won't." I laughed a little more, and Keza put her head against the table.

She hated it when I got like this. I should have been in tears, lamenting the loss of the man I loved's affection. But the giggling continued. With so much time holding everything in, down, and subdued, I think my body was just relieved to react. To feel. The pain in my chest was nothing compared to the suffocating ignorance I'd been living with. My heart, I could handle. I always had before.

She pulled me into a firm hug, kissing the top of my head. I held her hand against my chest and squeezed.

She smiled. "I love you, Robyn, my crazy beautiful girl."

"Love you too, Keza."

I don't know how long we sat there, swathed in silence. But eventually it was broken by the team walking in with hushed whispers and careful footsteps. I stared at the glass of water, whilst they sat all around us. A hand rested on top of mine. I looked up, expecting Eren or maybe Jean, but instead I found the worried face of the Commander.

Her brown eye then looked to Keza. "How is she?"

"Capable of answering your questions Glasses, go ahead."

I nodded and sat straight, still surprised to not see Eren. Where had he gone?

Hanji smiled wearily. "Did Levi hurt you, kiddo?"

"Just some bruising. Is he all right? He seemed strong enough at least…" I rubbed my throat.

She pursed her lips. "Apart from the obvious psychological issue, he seems in prime health."

"Thank fuck…" I breathed, closing my eyes for a moment. So many of my nightmares had starred a broken Levi; his body emaciated, bruised, beaten, flesh sliced into, branded, all manner of torture and torment written across it. To know that wasn't the case soothed those fears. Tamed those demons.

Hanji sighed. "But he's definitely had something done to him."

"Ya think?" snapped Keza, lips curled into a very unattractive snarl. I nudged her, and smiled pleadingly. It took a couple seconds, but she just puffed out her cheeks, and shrugged. Calm enough for now. I turned back to the Commander, and met her eye properly for the first time in many months. She seemed a little uncomfortable with this.

"Does his… 'psychological issue'… Does it seem to be in connection to anything but me?"

"Not so far, however—"

"Then I'll leave."

I'd fix it for everyone. The sooner Levi got back to his duty the better; it was what he had been fighting for right? I swallowed hard, no, that wasn't quite right was it… He'd been fighting for us for a while. For that simple and beautiful ring and its promises. For the chance to simply live instead of serve. But then I clenched my jaw, maintaining my smile. If he hated me now, maybe he could use that anger to fight with. Just put my face on every Titan he came across? Poor bastards wouldn't know what hit them.

Our Commander, my Hanji, looked heartbroken as she shook her head. "Robyn…"

"If the only thing holding him back is me, then I'm gone. Simple. You have your Captain back, humanity has its strongest back, and—"

"I don't consider that an option."

"Maybe you should."

"Oi. Cadet Sanshi, I meant it when I said you're vital to this regiment." She thumped her hand against the table, using my title to try and break through. I jumped a little. "The situation is delicate. We need to figure out what they've done to him and why. I'm assuming your own memories of captivity are still a bit scrambled?"

"No more than flashes of images. But really I've had nothing to go on… Nothing to trigger it. Did he say anything more specific after you dragged him off?"

"What do you mean?" She asked, eyes dipping.

"You need to tell me, Commander. If he said something significant, it might just kick my brain into gear… finally. We might get some damn answers out of my muddled brain."

"Well… Yes he did." The Commander looked round the group as a clear indication they all already knew. I waited, nails drumming against the table top as I fought my impatience. "Robyn… He claimed you were the Female Titan."

I laughed, leaning on the table, waiting for the punchline. But she's sincere. I looked at their pitying faces, and shook my head at them. "This is a joke right? Why would Levi think I was—"

My voice cut out. I jolted, whole body convulsing before going rigid. I put my hands to my suddenly pounding head. Noise. Colour. Pain. More noise. Movement. Beatings. Whippings. Questioning. Smiling red lips. Long nails and a smooth voice.

I gasped. "F-Fuck."

Keza held my shoulder, and Hanji the other. It seemed like they were speaking, but it echoed as I shook my head, trying to dispel the stabbing sensation between my ears. Dammit. Turns out ignorance really was bliss, remembering hurt like hell. The few memories I'd already had flashed across my mind, blinding me as they brightened into clarity. Soon joined by new ones. It was suffocating.

The Female Titan.

I heard the script replay, and I shuddered again, whimpers escaping through my clenched teeth. They convinced Levi. They made him believe it all. They drugged him over, and over, whispering into his ear, and making him watch as they tore me apart, spouting countless lies into my bruised face. Bit by bit they stripped him of his love of me, and made him believe their lies.

I was the Female Titan – not Annie.

I killed his team – not Annie.

He hated me – not Annie.

And of course, he wanted to kill me. I had convinced the rest of the Survey Corps that I was their ally, whilst plotting their destruction. I had framed Annie. All the pain and darkness, the beatings and drugs, it was all leading to this moment. I stared at the table top. My heart ached. Had he successfully killed me in that hallway, the Scouts would have potentially turned on him. Hell, they might have killed him. Eren probably would have. And then what? Eren would be taken by the MP's, studied and dissected. Humanity's Strongest, and Humanities Hope taken out in one swing. Morale would plummet. Paranoia would take over. Shit, the Scouts would crumble.

Control lost, power gone, mission failed.

They wanna see you crumble.

That was what Kenny had said. So if they couldn't find that stupid phrasing of Vincent's, then this was the back-up plan? Just remove me from the scenario? Destroy the Scouts from the inside.

I gasped as the torrent of realisation ended, and I leaned on the table till the room finally stopped spinning. No one spoke, all watching and waiting for me to explain.

I swallowed hard, and formed the words on my lips carefully, hoping I wouldn't vomit. "I know what they did."

And so I told them.

They all stared as I went through it, shivering as I relived it all.

Keza rubbed my back, eyes shining. "Well that explains all the fresh scarring."

"Is that everything?" whispered Hanji, looking a lot more like my friend and less like our Commander in that moment. Worried. Anxious. Though I admit, I find it odd that she's looking for more information. As I gave her a small frown, she blushed and looked away. I think she was just worried.

I sipped my water. "I'm assuming so yeah… kinda all came flooding back…"

Hanji nodded, but bit her lip as she fought fresh tears. Damn. I really had shaken her up.

"But what's the point?" Armin murmured, his calculating mind struggling to grasp the answer. "Is it just a sick game?"

"Very sick, but potentially, very clever." Hanji spoke quietly.

"Go on Hanji, spell it out, please." I begged, exhausted after my prolonged revelation. My head was cloudy as with six months of struggle, suddenly broken free. Like a breached dam, my head was doused in it, in memories full of torrential information; pain, and gut wrenching emotion. It was funny, a small part of me almost longed for the agonising ignorance. It had been a lot less overwhelming. Grass is always greener on the other side, I guess.

Hanji leaned on the table. "Well think about it, if had we let Levi and Robyn have their reunion alone, he'd have killed her already. Their plan would already be well under way. Look how furious Eren was at Levi attacking her. Can you even imagine his fury had it been anything worse?"

"Where is Eren?" I asked.

"He went to the roof to calm down. But if we hadn't sent him there, he'd have probably pummelled Levi into the ground. Imagine it, had Levi managed to kill you, Robyn. Eren would have lost it, killed Levi. Humanity's Strongest, gone. Eren would have been restrained if not killed for such insubordination. Then morale would plummet. The rookies would panic. The corps would crumble. Dominoes. It's all about avalanching dominoes."

So she had come to the same conclusion.

Shit.

The truth behind her realisation was clear to everyone. I could see it all sliding through their heads as it had mine; it was all to take down the corps. For some reason the White Cloaks wanted rid of us. Those that feared the outside world, and their lack of control over it.

My stomach churned. I clamped a hand over my mouth as I realised the extent of this game. To convince him of such things, what had they done to him? It seemed as though I'd had the easier time of it after all.

I needed to breathe, and I probably needed to go calm down Eren.

"I'll go see how Eren is. W-Where is Levi now?"

"The cells." Hanji admitted with a wince.

It made a cruel kind of sense. Without assigning both me, and Levi babysitters, it was the safest way. For now at least.

"All… All right. Thanks."

Hanji took my hand when I made to leave. "This isn't your fault, Ro–"

"I-I know." I squeezed her hand and kept moving, concentrating on my breathing. "I know…"

Making it to the roof, I found Eren pacing. His hands were tangled in his messy brown hair as he bared his white teeth. Had he gotten taller? I watched him stride around, his shoulders seemed broader, and his arms thicker. When had the lanky dork become a strong soldier? It seemed I'd ignored a lot over the past few months. I gave a small cough, and he spun, hands still in his hair as he stared, green eyes ablaze. But then he registered it was me. In a second he rushed over to me, hands on either side of my face, searching for something. I think he found it. He smiled, and kissed my forehead strongly. The hell had gotten into him?

He grinned. "You're still here."

He pulled me into a hug, and I focused on his steady heart-beat. It felt odd, this was how the foolish part of my mind had been hoping to meet Levi, or along these lines. Yet he was locked up in the cells, raving about his hatred for me, and I was seeking solace in the arms of my long suffering comrade. What a day. What a fucking mess.

"How bad was it?" Eren's voice was calm, but there is an edge of anger to it.

"Just a little bruising. I'm fine." I breathed, his hold tightening. "I'm so sorry."

"For what? He attacked you."

"For not appreciating all you were doing. I'm sorry. You're too good to me, Eren."

"Nonsense," he muttered into my hair. With shaky hands, I held onto his jacket. "I'm just glad you came back, despite what just happened."

"As far as I'm concerned, Eren, humanity has its strongest soldier back. That's what counts."

"But you still love him don't you?" As Eren held me at arms length, there was an odd twinge in his eyes, but I suppose he hoped I wouldn't, so it wouldn't hurt so much. It would be easier to say no; that I could claim, and believe, that it didn't hurt like hell. But it would be a lie. Eren was taller now, but he was still adorably naive. In some ways I think that's good – he hasn't lost every part of being a child at least. At 16 or so, in this world, it was easy to forget that sometimes. They had been through hell, they couldn't claim to be anywhere near childhood anymore… But they were still very young. Something to be protected and cherished.

"I think I always will Eren."

"Right…" He sighed.

"But I can't be selfish. My feelings are hardly the priority in this situation. We need to—"

"When are you selfish about anything?"

"Plenty," I smirked and he shook his head, and I didn't miss the rolling of his eyes either. I snorted. "You feeling better yet?"

"Me?" He asked wide eyed, I raised a brow and tapped his nose. He blushed.

"Yes, you, you little rager."

"Oh… yeah I'm good… I think." He paused, and clenched his jaw. "You don't hate him at all?"

"Huh?"

"You've been tearing yourself apart for so damn long, you've been dead inside. And now he acts like you murdered his whole family." By the end Eren's hissing through his teeth. Anger spilling over his supposedly calm demeanour.

I shook my head, and explained what this was all about. He wasn't there for Hanji's eloquent run-through, but I did my best. Eren went pale, but I did edit out most of the details about my torture sessions that I'd remembered. He didn't need to know that. But as I finished the story, he pulled me into a fresh hug.

Practically crushing me, a hand tangled in my hair as he breathed deep. "I won't let him hurt you."

"Eren, it's okay."

"No, none of this is okay!" He shouted, stepping back, and pointing towards the horizon, fury in his bright eyes. "We're meant to be fighting the monsters outside the walls, not the rats inside! If it's not the White Cloaks it's the Marleans or whatever they're called. What is wrong with people?"

"That's a very long list."

"I mean, I still hate him for hurting you, but fuck… what they must have done to him… to make him believe it that much."

"I'd rather not think about it."

"Sorry…" His eyes scanned me. "You alright now that you remember what they did to you?"

I shrugged. One crisis at a time. "Torture is not a new sensation for me."

"That's so fucked up."

"Prrresent!" I threw my hand up. He rolled his eyes, but the fury has dissipated. "I better get back, I think Hanji is cooking up a plan."

"You stay out of it."

"Whoa there…" I half laughed, looking at him sternly as he pointed his finger at me. Like he was telling off a toddler for playing with a bad group of kids. "I'm grateful for all you've done, Eren, but you do not tell me what to do."

"Sorry." He hung his head. "I uh… I'll stay here a bit, get this temper under control as best I can… Let me know if I can help though?"

I nodded and left him, lingering for a moment by the door as I heard his pacing begin all over again. So much fury, over me. The boy had clearly become attached in these past few months, I just hoped it didn't backfire on him like it seemed to with everyone else.

Sanshi's destroyed everything they touched.

So far… I hadn't seen that be proven wrong…

Thanks for reading!