Chapter 530

Make It Suffer

Cam, Cammy, Cameron and John Henry all went over everything Cameron did for the last week. Cam was plugged into John Henry's server and Cammy was connected to CamNet.

John and Savannah sat in and listened to them 'brainstorm'. John and Savannah sat next to each other. Each exchanged quick glances between them. Everyone watched Cameron to see if her glitch showed up. It didn't. They both thought about what almost happened. They also thought about what they both wanted to happen. The ground work was - laid. It was now just a matter of taking over where they'd left off. Destiny called to them and they both could 'hear' it.

Cameron was very clear to Savannah in the lab about what she wanted. She was also clear to John when she went off to their room when she left the lab.

Savannah and John both knew what Cameron said she wanted. They both still doubted that was what she really wanted but they would see what happened. Savannah didn't want to 'force' it. She wanted to be 'natural' and 'organic' like it almost was. That wasn't the issue right now even if it was on their minds.

There was no explanation for what happened to Cameron other than she'd been shot up and her chip port was damaged. As to why both her and John Henry 'spaced out' - Nobody knew.

Cameron decided to recall the extra female Terminators and Jesse from Palmdale. Claire again asked to move to the base, either base, with her daughters. Nothing was said about her husband, Paul. Claire wanted to move on. Allison wasn't ready to accept that. She caused Claire a lot of grief with her stubbornness. Claire thought it should be her decision not Allison's.

Claire was attracted to Jesse and Jesse was very receptive. They got along well with each other. It was the perfect 'good girl – bad girl' combination. Each of them wanted what the other could offer. They liked some qualities in each other and disliked some about themselves.

Cameron mentioned what Claire wanted to John. She left out some of the other things Claire was willing to do in this conversation. She'd previously told him to entice him. She didn't think if Claire was naked in John's bed he would turn her down. Not anymore. He done that to Jesse, Vanna and Allison in the past. It was more than a few times and sometimes they were in pairs to further entice him. She really wasn't sure how he resisted them. He did watch them together a few times but didn't join in.

"Mrs. Young would like to live at the base with her two – three daughters." Cameron said.

John heard this story before. He was sure it was Cameron's doing. Maybe this time it wasn't. A lot of Terminator hours and resources were tied up with the Details. Cameron seemed to staff most of them with her Terminators. No one was sure where she always seemed to get more. The future was a good bet. She'd also taken down a few Skynets on her own and collected more Terminators along the way.

He did need to consider the safety of the girls. Maybe it would be better for Savannah and Young Allison to be around each other more. He thought maybe that should wait until he took Savannah's virginity. He at least wanted to 'break her in'. He didn't want Savannah to focus on Young Allison and not him. If Savannah and Young Allison became closer then that might move Young Allison closer to his bed in a much shorter time, especially if he was 'with' Savannah. He wanted Young Allison's virginity too. Now the images from 'Pretty Baby' flooded his mind. He needed to refocus. He also needed to think about their security.

"Where are they safer at?" John asked. "I know no place is safe but where would they be the safest at?"

Cameron wanted to say the 'past' but didn't. That was the safest place for all of them. Her base was more secure than the Resistance base. No outsiders knew of its existence.

"My base would be." Cameron said. "Here at the Resistance base is the next most secure location. Summer and Jan could study and play together. It would be good for both of them. Savannah would be able to better instruct and mentor Young Allison…."

Both John and Cameron knew what that 'mentoring' would blossom into at some point. That seemed to be an inevitable conclusion. Neither one of them mentioned it. No one needed to. The other thing not mentioned was that Jan and Summer could become a pair as well. It was still off a ways but the closeness would cement it for both sets of girls.

Cameron was aware of Claire's offer to fill the void left by Allison, her daughter, to 'protect' the future as she'd 'ordered'. Hanna relayed to her again that Claire would either have John's baby and give it to her as 'her own' or carry another embryo for Allison as a surrogate if Allison failed again. Claire said she would also be at John's side if she was there as well. It was everything she wanted. It was an aberration to the 'Natural Order' but it would afford John immediate human female companionship. That was something she wanted for him. It would take some of the targets off his back to have a human female companion with children. Now Savannah may be ready to step up.

She wanted to 'mature' Young Allison in the past and have Savannah and Young Allison establish their relationship first. If Claire was there with John it would be a problem for Young Allison but not for Savannah. She was aware that Claire and Savannah shared in her future quite a bit. In fact both Claire and Savannah shared with almost everyone there. She encouraged that to make their stay and sacrifice for being there a little more enjoyable for them.

Savannah listened to the discussion. She thought of a few things of her own. She was well aware of her upbringing and the limitations and isolation that came with it. She wanted the best for Young Allison. She wanted Young Allison to have more than she'd experienced.

"What's better for Young Allison and Summer?" Savannah asked. "They need to have lives too. After my mother 'left' my life was very confined and isolated. I want Young Allison to have more opportunities than I experienced."

That statement from Savannah upset Cameron. She resisted a glitch impulse. It was very strong as she suppressed it.

"I don't know." Cameron said.

Cameron tried her best to make Savannah safe and give her what life she could. Sarah and John helped along with Vanna and Allison. All 'three' of Savannah's parents were gone and she was such a young girl at the time. She knew it must have been devastating for Savannah. Maybe that was why Savannah focused so deeply on her. There was a 'termination order' out on Savannah's head. She thought it was best if 'Savannah Weaver' died when the 'plane crashed' into her mother's office building.

The room fell silent.

It was clear that Cameron felt responsible for what Savannah said. They all knew it wasn't intended to be that way. It was just the way it sounded or came out.

Savannah could see she'd made a mistake in the open forum. She knew Cameron tried to keep her alive and protect her.

"We can talk about it later." Savannah quickly said. "I'm sorry, Cameron."

Savannah didn't mean to upset or offend Cameron.

Cameron smiled at Savannah and she smiled back at Cameron. There was no animosity between them.

John decided to move the discussion along. A different subject should do that.

"Let's go over our next targets and see if we can find the suspected HK or Terminator assembly lines." John said.

Cameron smiled at Savannah again. Now it was time to get back to work.

"This is what I remember…." Cameron said.

She went over what she'd done for the last week again. At least the parts she could remember. There was a lot of missing data.

John Henry wasn't sure if that was because of loose connections or some other issue. Cameron may have thought she was 'Allison – Future Allison' again at some point too. There was never any record of that.

Cameron went out to run a few errands. She'd picked up a few items for use later on and returned back to the Resistance base. She noticed Jesse was back. They talked for awhile. She again reminded Jesse that Savannah missed Young Jesse. She wanted to make sure Savannah felt loved and shared love.

Cameron never saw the issues of the past with any of the girls as a problem. It was simply what – was. That was then and this was now. They were who they were now or strived to be.

The girls from the future always saw it differently. It was all of the things that 'happened' to them or that they'd done. It followed them around even when they tried to forget it.

Jesse returned to her room unsure what Cameron wanted her to do. She knew Young Jesse was her but she also knew SHE wasn't Young Jesse. She knew she carried a lot of baggage and wasn't a good person before. She'd hurt people on purpose. That really bothered her now.

Cameron noticed Gail standing there in the distance. She looked a little lost. She approached her. Gail turned to leave.

"Gail." Cameron said.

Gail stopped and turned.

Cameron took her hand. She knew there were times when Gail missed Duplicate Jesse that was now in River's future. That also fell on her shoulders. She'd hoped 'giving' Gail another 'Jesse' would solve that problem. It didn't but it helped a lot.

"I'll go with you." Cameron said. "I understand…."

Gail didn't want to be a bother. She hoped her 'feelings' would pass or she could suppress them.

"I don't want to 'ask'." Gail said.

Cameron knew this was another failure that was on her. She was the one that took Duplicate Jesse away from Gail. She could have pulled her off to the side and away from where the Terminator's power cell exploded. That would have been an aberration in the timeline. She'd taken her back to River's future to keep her promise to John.

"I know what you want…." Cameron said. "I asked her to stay in River's future. I promised John I wouldn't change the timeline - here."

Gail could see the stress that she'd created for Cameron right now. She knew Cameron did what she could to 'fix' it.

"I know you gave her back to me as well as her younger self too." Gail said. "I still miss MY Jesse."

Cameron rethought the episodes with the different sheaths that she'd wanted to use and how people saw it. Even if it was identical – it wasn't the same. She knew Gail felt that way about HER Duplicate Jesse. Maybe there were some things that they could do still.

"Do you wish to replace Summer?" Cameron asked.

Gail knew that Cameron referred to Metal Summer.

"Summer is you. I could never replace you – her." Gail said.

Cameron knew there would be additional problems here. If Gail went after Duplicate Jesse that act would leave Jesse here without Gail. Would Gail want to come back at a later date for Jesse?

"What about Jesse - here?" Cameron asked.

Gail could see the problem right away. She loved Jesse and Duplicate Jesse. She would need to give one up for the other.

"I don't know." Gail said. "I love her. I love both of them."

Cameron thought of a couple of solutions. As long as they had access to a TDE there were several possibilities.

"You can live with Jesse until she is old and dies and then either go back and replace yourself and live your life again or go into the future to live with Duplicate Jesse right after I sent Summer."

Gail heard stories about Cameron before.

"Is that what you've done?" Gail asked. "Things like that?"

Cameron really wished she knew the answer to that question.

"I believe it is. I think this is my third or fourth time around. It might be my first or my hundredth. I don't know." Cameron said. "I want you to decide what you want and I will help you do it. I only ask you think of Jesse here now, too."

Gail could see at times that Cameron would like to be elsewhere.

"Is that why you're still here - for John?" Gail asked.

Cameron thought of her recent encounter with Savannah in the lab.

"Yes." Cameron said. "I believe I most often have taken Savannah and Future Allison and then gone into the past to share my life with them. It's what I desire now."

Gail knew Savannah and Future Allison were 'top choice' on everyone's 'wish list' – after Cameron.

"I don't want to hurt Jesse." Gail said. "I love her too, just as much. I understand now why so many things affect you as they do. The pain never stops…."

Every time Cameron tried to make the pain stop or go way she seemed to make it worse.

"Life is about choices." Cameron said. "I've made plenty of bad ones myself. Jesse is a fine woman, especially now. Think of the options I've presented. I would suggest a clone but that isn't the same thing either. I understand that better now."

"Thank you for thinking about me and both of My Jesses." Gail said. "I will think about it some more. The fact that you saved My Jesse was the most important thing anyway. I'll never forget that. She still lives because of you, even if that's hundreds of years in the future."

Cameron hugged Gail and left. She needed to find Sarah and Kyle.

Cameron double checked with John Henry to see how he was. She also checked herself three times. They both seemed OK.

It was time to destroy the Skynet 'infant' that she'd captured.

It lacked a visual or verbal interface hook up. Cameron gave it both. She was aware she'd advanced this Skynet unit but it would be short lived. It wasn't going anywhere except the scrap pile.

Cameron hooked it up and isolated it in the storage area with its thick concrete walls.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in." Cameron said.

Sarah and Kyle walked in. The visual input was away from them. Cameron would give Sarah the option to face it if she wanted that. The audio input was off as well.

Sarah could see what Cameron laid out for her. It was the source of what ruined her life and killed so many she cared about.

"Is that the piece of crap that's hurt me, my son and Kyle?" Sarah asked.

Cameron knew a lot of things were possible. To change some of them would change the future. Since this version of Skynet never advanced, it wouldn't actually change anything in its current form.

"Yes. If left to grow it could become the same Skynet that has tried to hurt you and John so many times and did hurt Future Kyle." Cameron said. "It might become the same Skynet that created me too."

Sarah wanted more than to destroy it outright. She wanted payback. She wanted it to feel pain.

"It looks pathetic." Sarah said. "How can I hurt it and make it suffer?"

Cameron turned around and picked up something. It was a large car battery and a set of jumper cables.

"You may start with this and we will progress afterwards." Cameron said.

They saw Cameron exhibited a number of items on a table in back of her. There was even a small blowtorch there. It was clear that Cameron planned to torture it.

Kyle was very uneasy. He didn't like to see Sarah like this. She was full of anger and hate right now. That was never a good combination for anyone.

"Sarah, I see Cameron has a chair here for me." Kyle said. "I'm only going to watch. I want this to be about you and Cameron and your 'special date'. Maybe I should go instead…."

Cameron could see that Sarah was all in and that Kyle was uncomfortable.

"I can have a visual and verbal interface so you may allow it to see and hear you." Cameron said.

Sarah smiled. She wanted more.

"Can I hear it suffer?" Sarah asked.

Cameron already tested everything when she'd made the upgrades. She needed to fine tune them some to get maximum awareness and what would be felt as 'pain'.

"Yes. I taunted it to test its awareness and pain levels." Cameron said. "It already threatened to disfigure me and turn me into a 'Metal Whore'."

Sarah said she wanted Skynet to see her and hear her.

Cameron suggested Kyle return to Jan as they tortured Skynet.

Sarah understood Cameron wanted to protect Kyle from seeing her rage and anger. It was going to be ugly.

"I understand, Cameron." Sarah said. "Kyle doesn't need to see this or see me do this."

Kyle and Sarah exchanged a long look.

He looked a little hesitant to leave Sarah. As long as Cameron was there she should be OK.

"I would prefer you not see me at my cruelest, Kyle." Sarah whispered.

Kyle hugged Sarah and left. He knew Cameron wanted him to go and not see Sarah at her meanest, maybe at her worst.

Sarah looked at Cameron.

Cameron went over all the ways to slowly make Skynet – terminate. She told Sarah that they could make it last hours or days.

Sarah looked at the infant computer with fire in her eyes and hate in her heart. She wondered if she could urinate on it at some point and not get shocked.

"Thank you, Cameron." Sarah said. "Let's get started. Who could better assist me with this than you?"

Cameron smiled.

"Nobody…." Cameron said.

Sewer Of My Mind

As I wade through
The sewer of my mind
It's a maze of eternity
What will I find

Shall I twist it more
Until it will jam or bind
Or free its contents
So it may unwind

With each new message
Our feelings become intertwined
Darkness and depression exist
Our thoughts remain entwined

What is it we can not see
Is It that we are blind
Are we on a different page
Or is it that we are kind

Nobody