It felt weird- sitting in the plane, next to her brother, bound for Sea-Tek airport. Although the Seattle convention for advanced scientific projects was planned way in advance by Sandy's parent company, she could not shake that feeling it came at the worst possible moment, for multitude of reasons. The breakup she faced 4 months ago, was not the most amicable one, and pulling plug on few relationships she had, always left her deep in emotional turmoil. Another reason was the fact that the female co-worker, which was supposed to accompany her, ended-up giving birth to her offsprings, and by such unexpected turn of event, keeping the depressed squirrel female in her early 30's woefully unprepared to present an important thesis on molecular restructuring all by herself. And lastly, her twin brother Randy used her moment of weakness when she admitted she'll go solo on the trip to Seattle, badgering his sister incessantly for days, until she finally gave in to the pressure. Despite her futile attempts to distract Randy from taking the trip, suggesting that except Space needle there ain't much to see there, he remained dead-set to embark on that adventure with his sister.
Sandy wasn't fully aware of how much that meant for him. Their parents weren't really spreading the care and love between them evenly, and especially after 18th years of age, he was looked upon as a letdown, particularly due to the stellar performance of his sister, which overshadowed any accomplishment that Randy could possibly accomplish. Despite apparent disparity of parent's favor, Randy never felt hatred or jealousy for his sister, quite the contrary, he revered her as his best friend and thanks to her kind-hearted nature, he felt that she was the reason to keep on living. However, upon her enlistment at the College, and her following departure to Arizona, He continued helping his dad running the family farm in the part of Texas he called "middle of butt-fuck nowhere". Unfortunately, the mundane toil of day-to-day hard work, mixed with his father's harsh and unforgiving attitude, as well as lack of any peers he could call friends, grinded his resolve to stay there, to a point, where one day, after a fierce exchange of opinions with his father, and couldn't bear the idea of staying a day longer. And thus, Randy filled his duffel-bag with the few things he needed to grab, and left the place he called home, heading towards unknown in the darkness of the night.
The next set of years he spent travelling the Southwest, doing odd jobs, filled with seasonal stays at motels and trailer parks, however he never forgot to write his sister, sending postcards from scattered places he visited. His life would likely keep on going in this fashion, if it wasn't for his lucky strike, where he got invited to visit Sandy, not long after she landed a permanent position at UNM, right after her return from post-graduate Oceanographic expedition of some sorts. As a matter of coincidence, by the time he read the invitation he was at the Four corners monument, roaming with a bunch of Europeans in rented minivan. Parting ways with them was an easy choice, he grew bored of that piss-beer drinking lot, besides he hasn't seen Sandy in years. The luck was definitely on his side, since two hours later he was sitting in the back of a truck, owned by group Frat boys returning back to their Alma Mater. "Albuquerque- here I come!"
Upon his arrival and receiving heartwarming welcome hug from Sandy, and after four days of sharing their life stories, and after his regular "relax evenings" with bottle by his side it became clear to Randy that his twin sister felt genuinely sorry for the lifestyle he was waging. He knew that during his roaming times he developed somewhat of a drinking problem which, according to her, was a "coping mechanism" of his loneliness. The last day of his stay she looked somewhat sad and insisted to have a sit-down with him after she gets back from work. After her return they went on a walk-through Japanese garden, close to Rio Grande river. She was wearing a smile, but he knew that was an attempt not to look too serious. There was no denying that her sister cared about him way more than she was willing to admit. He was her only brother, and the prospect of waving him goodbye to a life without any prospect was tearing her apart from within. As a result of not exactly pleasant conversation, the cards were laid on the table- She decided to offer him a small room in her cramped 2-bedroom apartment, in exchange for his "adaptation" to the ordinary life, straightening his act. The thought of being committed to one place sounded awful, and, combining with the southern male pride made him flat-out decline her offer. She stood there, gazing at her feet. Then she grabbed his hands and looked into his eyes. "I'm willin' to help, Randy." – she uttered with shaking voice "but it's you who need to want that change"
He noticed that in the corner of her eyes started to get wet with tears. She moved her face away to hide the emotions she could not hide well. "We're in this together, bruh, I'll back ya up. How 'bout that?" It became blatantly obvious there was no way he could leave without loosing her sister's affection for him. He didn't have many people that he could rely on, in fact, he doubted that except her there are any at all. And he felt he owed her for not giving up on him after all those years. And than some guilts from the past.
"Guess I'll give it a try" Randy replied with a dry throat. He was looking towards horizon, gazing at befalling peaceful sunset. He looked at her again. She was watching the orange skies, but although she was biting her lip, the corners of her mouth were pronounced in a subtle smile. They both sat in her small car as the late fall chill breeze from the desert started creeping in. "Wanna grab a bite?" she asked "there's a Doghouse drive-in not far from here". The warm Hotdog sounded just as good as beer to flush it with "Can I grab a 6-pak too?" -Randy retorted. "Hmm... Maybe a Modelo, a'right?" was the answer he didn't' want to hear from his sister, making him cringe by the thought of that taste. But knowing his sis, there wasn't much room for negotiations at this particular moment. Not without straining this bonding attempt from newly-formed sibling alliance.
The next days were one of the most difficult in Randy's life. Particularly his lurking desire to embrace the warm fuzzy feel only alcoholic beverage could offer him. However-as Sandy promised- she was around on the late afternoons and evenings, making ways to keep his mind free of ubiquitous cravings. Randy became aware that Sandy was having an ongoing relationship, however she was dedicating every available time watching over her brother, on many occasions even sacrificing her life to improve Randy's. Plenty of walks, visits of places as well as weekend trips to nice Vistas the Land of Enchantment could offer. On many occasions he wanted to set himself free, but soon Sandy realized what was an inevitable outcome of these escapes. He wanted to hate her on these occasions, when she was giving him sour looks, often accompanied with scoldings. Several months later, on one instance he became physical, trying to push her out of the doorway on his way out, and surprisingly that turned out to take more effort than he imagined, due to fact she was still keeping herself in top physical form. After a struggle he set himself free, and was leaving, Sandy yelled in broken voice what was the cost of her devotion to keep him straight and narrow. She told him how she lost her boyfriend, who dumped her because on account of all the times she ditched him, just so she could babysit his misfit "sorry ass".
She lost so much in order to prop him up. His incompetence to rein himself in broke her to a point she became just as alone as he was. That realization was having a devastating effect on his rogue demeanor. He could not do that, simple as that. Not to his sister. Not today, not ever.
This catalytic moment of clarity could not come at any better time. The coming weeks prior the upcoming Seattle trip he was doing quantum leaps on his path of improvement. He managed to score a job on a construction site, only a few blocks away from the place where he was staying. He could not notice how deep was Sandy struck losing her relationship, which didn't seem to be a significant one. Never liked Taylor, the co-worker scientist Sandy was meeting at his ritzy place, could not get rid of the feeling him looking down on his amazing sister as a token girlfriend, with her weakness to redeem her lost cause of her brother. Siphoning away the time she could spend with that dude, didn't seem to bother him much at that time, however her recent crushed demeanor in recent week, made him re-evaluate the toll Sandy had to pay in order to improve the life of his. Every time when he was not working crazy overtimes on the job site, he tried to spend buying groceries and making half-ass cooking efforts he could pass as a dinner. His drinking problem was almost under control, except few nights where Sandy apologized, and went to her room. On few instances he saw her coming out, every time with red, puffy eyes. Those were the moments he could not bear the anguish of seeing his strong sister down. Those were the moments where he became guilty of secretly sneaking-out in the dead of the night to get himself a bottle in a convenience store, but never drinking more than enough to help him forget his shame and guilt.