"Going good up until we shut 'em down
Bum a ride to the other side of town"
"Coming," Neb called from inside. Max stood alone at her door once again. At least she'd managed to knock, this time. She was tying her paws in knots while she waited for Neb to come to the door, though. How was she going to explain this? Could Neb even help her with this?
She couldn't bear the wait anymore and turned to flee. Right as she took her first step back, though, she could already hear Neb's claws tapping on the floor next to the door. Even if she ran, Neb would be able to see her well after she fled. The knob clicked as it opened, and Max turned back around. She grabbed her scarf with both paws to brace herself.
"Hel—," Neb's eyes shot open when they went over Max's ear, "—oh sweet son of Celebi, are you okay?!"
Max scrunched down to pull her scarf over her face. "It's not that bad, is it?" she whimpered. Her ear stung when she tried to flatten it behind her head and made her wince.
Neb leaned in to nuzzle into the crook of Max's neck and whispered, "I'm sorry." Her presence was nice, but Max couldn't help noticing that Neb hadn't answered the question. Neb walked around behind her and started nudging her along. "Here, come inside." Max begrudgingly pulled her scarf down enough to see but kept it over the lower half of her face. "What happened?"
All the neatly packed and sorted boxes in the house vied for Max's attention. "Eleos pierced my ear," she said. As if it wasn't bad enough, Neb led her over to a box big enough to sit against. Max grit her teeth as she leaned back, trying not to let herself think about it. She'd already cried about this yesterday.
"With a blowtorch?" Neb mumbled, making Max whimper and scrunch back into her scarf again. "Sorry, I'm sorry." The box behind her scraped open, making Max's ear (painfully) twitch. "It's all right. I learned treating Mandy that burns always look a lot worse than they are." Max tried to burrow deeper into her scarf—how bad it looked was her chief concern, here.
"Hey, hey, it'll be okay, don't worry," Neb cooed, pawing at Max's shoulder to comfort her. She tapped at Max's forepaws to coax them down enough to look her in the eyes. Neb was smiling, but Max could see the burgeoning concern.
"Well," Neb started with a shrug and forced levity. "I guess I don't need to ask how your first day off is going so far."
"That, well," Max said. She tugged her scarf back down and tucked it around her neck to reveal a timid smile. "It's not been too bad so far!" Neb looked down with a raised brow. Max didn't have trouble keeping her smile up, though. "The date was fun! Sure, the gift went a bit… South." Her smile twisted a bit, but it stayed nonetheless. "But, well, it's still a pretty earring, right?"
Neb stared down at her. Tilting her head side to side, she looked around to examine Max up and down, though she wasn't looking for damage. "Who are you?" she asked with a bit of a chuckle. Max tilted her head a bit, and Neb shook her head. "Max, you're not usually the optimistic type."
Max opened her mouth to object but shrunk back down. "Well, yeah, it's not easy," she admitted. "I guess I'm trying new things." She shrugged and looked up, smile not quite staying strong, but staying nonetheless.
Neb's gaze looked her over. She nodded supportively but with glances up at Max's charred tip of an ear. "Trying new things?" Neb asked, mouth twisting down. She stared up at the burn and shook her head. "Honestly? Not a fan of the new look, sorry."
"Neb!" Max whined.
"All right, all right," Neb chuckled. She brought her paw back up to rub Max's shoulder a bit more insistently, then smiled down. "I'm glad you're making the effort." Max suddenly felt too flustered to be angry; Neb shook her head. "Arceus, it's amazing how far you've come."
Max shrunk further away, but Neb's paw kept firm. "C'mon, Neb," she forced a chuckle. "You already told me that yesterday." Her cheeks sparked when she tried to look up at Neb, so she glanced around to avoid her gaze. That turned out to be a mistake. The scant few decorations and all but the barest essentials hid, tucked neatly away in boxes. Even though it was all still there, the house felt so empty.
Neb's paw moved to dab a tear out of Max's eye. "Yeah, we covered a lot yesterday, didn't we?" Neb said. Max couldn't bear to look up but still nodded. "Let's get this patched up and have some fun, then. How's that sound?"
Finally, Max had enough reason to perk up. She still winced when her ear twitched unexpectedly, but her smile endured nonetheless. "Yeah, sure," she said softly. Even smiling, she couldn't quite look up yet. "It can't be too long, though. I made plans with Cori." She could only glance up apologetically. "But, y'know, you could probably come along if you want!"
With a chuckle, Neb shook her head and tousled Max's head-fur. "I appreciate it, but that's all right," she said. Thuds from the box Max sat against stole the mouse's chance to protest. Neb turned her attention to a bottle and a tiny, thin cloth.
The cap spun itself off the bottle, and the cloth came to cover up the opening. The bottle tipped upside down and whatever liquid it held started soaking the folded cloth. Right as it was about to start spilling out the bottom, the bottle righted itself. The cloth floated away and towards Max's ear while the bottle closed itself.
Max knew what was coming and tried to prepare for the incoming sting, scrunching up her face and cowering into herself. The cloth hastily wrapped around the burn, but the pain dulled to a tingle in an instant. She sighed out a breath of relief.
"Lidocaine," Neb said with a smirk. "Never leave home without it." Max nodded along as if she knew what that was, too relieved to be confused. "Let me know when it stops tingling, all right? I want it numb as possible." The relief started to retreat. Max blenched slightly while she nodded and looked up. "Don't worry. I just need to clean off the dead skin. This should keep you from feeling a thing."
"All right," Max sighed. The tingling grew in intensity for a while as more of the anesthetic started to soak in until it started properly smothering the nerve endings. All at once, the tingling stopped, and she could barely feel the tip of her ear at all. "I-is it still there?"
Neb chuckled, and the cloth floated away and folded up on top of the bottle. "Yep, still there, don't worry. That just means it's working," she explained. Max let out another sigh of relief. "Let me know if it starts hurting again while I'm cleaning it, so I can add some more." Neb looked down to give Max a comforting smile. "I'll try to make this as painless as possible."
The promise helped, but Max was going to be terrified until this was done. She cinched her eyes shut, brought her tail around front to hug tight, and prepared for the worst. The lidocaine did its job excellently. Light tugs to its entirety were the only indications of Neb working on it.
Pain was only half of the horror, though. Max was terrified of what she'd see if she opened her eyes. How much was Neb wiping off? Would any be left by the end of it? She squeezed her tail tighter and started shaking.
"It's all right," Neb softly told her, resting a paw on Max's shoulder. "I'm almost done."
"Pika," Max whimpered with a nod.
Neb pat her shoulder again and kept it there while she kept working on the burn. The tugs tapered off in intensity just in time for feeling to begin to return. No pain, luckily, but she could feel pressure on the tip, now. Max had trouble making out the sensations at all, but it was definitely there if she focused on it. Since her ear had her undivided attention, she did it with ease.
Only the harder presses managed to make it through the numbing, though, and they faded as well. Eventually, she felt cloth wrapping the rest of the way down her ear and knew Neb was done.
Max peaked her left eye open. The bandage covered it up almost completely. She gave it a few test wiggles without any issue, though of course it felt stiffer. Neb had even left the earring visible by having the bandages go on each side. Max gave it a few more test wiggles and started to relax, leaning back and letting her tail go.
Seeing this, Neb rubbed Max's shoulder one last time and pulled her paw back. "I'll leave these with you," she said. The lidocaine, bandages, and a widemouthed jar of whatever balm floated over to Max's bag. "What's still there will heal, but…." Neb looked down at Max with an awkward smile, then shook her head with a chuckle. "Curse you for making me give you bad news two days in a row."
"Oh, y'know, I hadn't considered how awful it must be for you," Max moaned with violent sarcasm and a smile. A playful glare from Neb spurred the mouse on. "My deepest condolences." Max pursed her lips out and grabbed at her heart with both paws. "I'm so sorry for your—," a harmless marble of psychic energy plunked between her eyes, "—pi!"
"Oh, I'll miss you," Neb chuckled. Max rubbed at the spot the marble hit, looking away while her cheeks warmed. "No one's annoying quite like you are."
Max rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "Wow, thanks," she said with a grin. "So glad to leave it off on a good note." As she looked up at Neb, she somehow didn't feel her mirth vanishing with the breeze. Perhaps she really had cried about it enough yesterday.
"Good note," Neb hummed, looking to the side in thought. After a bit, her ears popped up. "Right! There was something else I wanted to give you."
"Oh?" Max mumbled. "That's sweet, but you don't have to." She looked away to scratch at the back of her neck. Two friends got her gifts today, and she hadn't gotten them anything. Maybe she should pick something up for Cori on her way to meet them, just in case.
A small, rectangular box plunked down next to the bandages. "Recognize these?" Neb asked. Max stared down at them for a bit and tilted her head. The box looked familiar, but she couldn't tell from where. Trying to remember didn't give her a headache, though, so she had at least some idea when she'd seen them. It wasn't enough to figure it out, though, so she shook her head.
The narrow flap of the box opened as Neb silently nodded. Cards streamed out in a neat line, and Max slapped a paw to her forehead once she made out the ace of spades. "Beekle cards, duh," she sighed.
Neb narrowed her eyes to try and decipher that. "Did you say… was that pika-speak?" she asked.
Her own words played to her own ear, and Max chuckled. "No, it's from when I was a kid," she said, a few stray sparks bouncing down her cheeks. "I couldn't really read yet, so I thought 'bicycle' said 'beekle' and, well, I guess I never stopped calling them that." For all the times she'd explained that before, she had to wonder why she still called them that. When she tried to recall any more about it, though, what felt like a jagged rock embedded itself in the left side of her skull.
She went completely slack save a wince so intense it drained the color off her face. Several Nebs swirled around in her vision. Max brought her paw to hold her head while the ache ran its course. Despite the pain, she hadn't actually been hit by a sudden blunt force since she didn't feel a boulder sticking out of her head with her paw.
The shock of the pain started wearing off, and the pain itself started to wind down, too. Max didn't bother trying to move, though. Any slightest movement irritated her headaches when she got them.
A cup floated up to her mouth. She didn't have the energy to question it, so she opened her mouth and let the water pour over her tongue. It was barely less than lukewarm, perfect for a headache. The three Nebs started to intermittently consolidate into one, though they didn't seem to stay that way for long. Max didn't bother trying to focus her eyes for fear it would make the headache worse.
She swallowed the water and opened up for more. An oran squished its way into her mouth instead. She didn't want to hurt herself chewing, so she squished it once to close her mouth and waited. Maybe she'd try more once the bit of juice she swallowed started helping.
"No wonder you were so against remembering anything," the Nebs said, shaking their heads.
"Mnnuh huh," Max blearily agreed. She was pretty sure this wasn't her main concern when she'd first met Neb, but it probably didn't help. A groan rumbled out of her throat. She started to chew on the oran. "Doesn'd helb when—," she started, but cut herself off. She'd be incomprehensible until she swallowed that oran. The more she chewed it, the less chewing hurt.
After she had about half of it choked down, she tried again, saying, "Doesn't help when I forget about it." She (very gently, very slowly) shook her head and growled. "Ugh, I don't think I've ever had one this bad." The cup came back to tip more water in, and Max used it to swallow down the rest. The headache had faded, but it was still there, and any remotely fast movement made it throb in pain. For now, though, she was okay.
A few of the cards started approaching her, so she looked up at Neb. "I'll make it easier for you," Neb explained with a smirk.
Once Max looked at the first card, a blush started to burn her ears and spark her cheeks. She'd recognized them as playing cards, but she also recognized this deck in specific. Seeing the chunks bitten out of the six and four of hearts and the three of clubs reminded her exactly when she'd encountered it last.
"There it is," Neb sang. "I hope they don't still look so tasty to you."
"You're a bitch, you know that?" Max chuckled. She shook the embarrassment off and quickly winced once her headache objected to the motion.
"I try my best," Neb said. They met each other's glares for a moment before mutually letting them down with shared giggles. The three ruined cards slotted back into the box. Neb took a step back and set the deck down between them. "Usually, I play memory to help the people I'm treating along, but I think you're a bit passed that."
The deck split itself in half. One half sat next to the other, and both bent up before riffling into each other. They repeated this process twice more, then Neb sat the deck right between them and dealt two cards to herself, one face up, the other down; and two to Max, both face up.
"Blackjack?" Max asked, looking at her cards. When she saw a four and a two, she glared up at Neb. "I'm not sure I trust you as a dealer."
Neb rolled her eyes and showed her own eight to Max. "It's not like we're playing for money," Neb chided.
That simply wouldn't do, not for Max. She silently smirked and reached into her bag to grab her coin purse. "No point in playing without that," she said, tossing two poké in.
Seeing the paltry bet made Neb snicker, "Oh, so you're a high roller?" Max thought about adding some more to spite her, but decided against it once she saw another coin purse plop down on Neb's side. "I know the dealer wins a push, but let's keep it friendly for now."
It was a pretty generous concession, but Max still feigned a pout. "I guess," she said. Since she knew the rest of the rules, she turned to her cards. It didn't take much thought for her to decide to tap the floor, though reaching down took a bit more effort than she wanted to sustain. As her next card landed atop the others, she rolled over and laid on her belly, resting her head on her arms.
The cards fled, and Neb raised a brow. "This is your deck, you know," she said.
Max hadn't considered how it would look when she changed positions. Now that she did, she had to laugh. "I'm just making it easier on myself," she said. The cards came half-way back as if still nervous she wanted another taste. A seven. Max looked up at Neb's eight and frowned.
With a total of thirteen, she had moderately better than a fifty percent chance to bust. Even worse, she realized, since all three of the cards missing were in her safe range. Nevertheless, Neb had an eight, so Max didn't have much of a choice. She shrugged and slapped her paw into the ground. She wasn't expecting much, but seeing a five almost made her snarl. At least they were apparently splitting ties.
She waved her paw over her cards and glared up at Neb with growing (playful) suspicion. Once Neb flipped over another eight, though, all suspicions vanished. Neb flipped over her next card and revealed a ten. Victory: Max tossed a clenched paw into the air as four poké bounced back at her.
There wasn't a single thing she could buy with an extra two poké, but she didn't mind. The bets gave the game some stakes, but adding risk could end up souring her good day. An extra pawful of poké could come or go without overriding the fun she was having just spending time with Neb. Although, she started to wonder if she couldn't bet something to really make the day great.
As Neb collected all the cards and put them back in the box, Max looked up with a smirk. Once Max caught her eye, Neb tilted her head back. "What're you planning?" she asked, but Max only gave her a shrug. Neb watched her for a moment before shaking her head. "All right, then. Place your bet."
Just like that, the trap had sprung. "A day," Max said. "If I win, you have to stay another day." She looked up with complete confidence in her gaze, though she didn't really expect Neb to agree. The four poké she'd just won waited at the ready in her paw.
It didn't look like she needed them, though. Neb chuckled and smirked down at her. "A day, then?" Neb asked, a sharp gleam in her eyes. Already, it looked like she'd found the perfect counter, but Max didn't let herself waver. She nodded, keeping her smug smile on. "All right." Neb leaned back and brought out the next deal. "So, we're betting tomorrow, then?"
That felt like an odd way to phrase it, but Max nodded. That was more or less right, and she had to hide her reaction from getting two aces. "Yep," she said, reaching forward to pull the cards apart.
It took a lot to hide her giddiness when Neb noticed the cards. Neb didn't lose any confidence of her own, though, which made Max somewhat worried. "If that's the case, if I win…." Neb smirked down at Max like she was helpless prey. "How do you feel about visiting your old team?"
All at once, Max's cold, calculating confidence shattered. "Tomorrow?!" she balked, but she didn't really need clarification. The answer sat on Neb's smug grin. Of course Neb would do this to her. "Th-it's way too soon!" Max had never gotten Neb to see reason before, but that never stopped her before, either. Her tail squirmed and flicked around behind her from worry. "Maybe eventually, but tomorrow?"
"Max," Neb chuckled, shaking her head. "Look at your cards." Max was too worked up to glance down, but she got the point. "Two hands, both aces. My bet's practically a formality." They might be good hands, but the stakes had all of a sudden become astronomical. Max started scrunching her way into her scarf again.
So much for her good day of simple fun.
"You'll be as afraid tomorrow as you are in a year," Neb said. A psychic force tugged Max's scarf back under her chin. Max looked up to see Neb smiling down at her. "But again, do you really think you'll lose with those hands?"
Max looked down at her cards again. Ace of hearts, ace of diamonds. Neb had a point. Busting with aces would take some doing. Still, the threat hung over her head and held her back. She might feel better about it after talking with Neb yesterday, but was she really ready? Then again, would she ever be? She took a deep breath and nodded. "All right," she said.
Her smirk couldn't quite return, but Max managed to smile. "Deal," she said. The challenge gleamed in her eye again, and she saw the same in Neb's. A card floated over to the ace of hearts on her left. The ace of clubs. "Are you sure you shuffled these?"
Neb stared down at the card with shock of her own and mumbled, "Maybe not." She shrugged and looked back up at Max, a new chink in her confident smirk. "Hit? Stay?"
Max rolled her eyes and tapped the floor. A twelve could only beat a bust, and she wasn't going to count on it. When the next card came and flipped to reveal an eight, she nearly jumped in excitement. She managed to stay down, but she couldn't hold back a triumphant, "Pi!" She was worried for nothing. With a wave of her paw, they went to the next hand.
Over came a four. If she didn't have the twenty to fall back on, Max would've been sweating. She had enough security to be risky, so she went for another hit, not really caring what came of it. A five came over to greet its new friends.
"Two twenties?" Neb grumbled under her breath. It was all for show, though. Max could tell with a glance she wasn't worried. The fact Neb took the bet at all warmed Max's heart a bit. The goodbye wasn't gonna be easy for either of them. Max had to wonder if she'd ever had a goodbye like this one. Her mind started to wander to her old team, but she stopped herself. Fun day, this was her fun day.
With nothing to lose, Max tapped the floor for another hit. She'd already gotten three aces. She just needed the fourth, now. The card floated over, and she could hardly wait. She tilted her head to catch a glimpse before it flipped, but the card tilted away from her. She looked up with a playful leer at Neb and stuck out her tongue.
Neb reciprocated the gesture and flipped the next card over to reveal a jack. Diamonds, too, just like the card that started the hand. What a flashy way to accomplish nothing.
"Double or nothing," Max said. She tapped the floor again for another card. That last ace was hers. Unfortunately, she got a two instead. "Oh, come on." She let out a sigh but didn't lose any bit of her smile. Her heart was beating into the floor. Maybe she was getting a bit too into it. "Guess I got nothing," she mumbled with a shrug. It didn't bother her, though, so she looked over to watch Neb close out the game.
A jack of clubs sat face up on Neb's side; Max's heart stopped. She really should've looked at that first—why didn't she look at the dealer's cards?! Would it have even changed anything?
No, calm, she needed to calm down. Three aces were already out. Neb wasn't going to beat a twenty.
Yet, dread kept building in her stomach. She had to know what Neb's other card was. It felt like an eternity had passed already, and she wondered why Neb was taking so long for an instant before realizing her mind was just racing that fast.
"Gonna be okay?" Neb asked.
Max nodded, eyes trained on the hidden card with all of her attention. She didn't even want to bother trying to speak, way too stressed to avoid slipping. The chances were beyond in her favor, almost ridiculously so. She had no reason to stress, yet stress she did. It felt like she'd tripped right next to a cliff and had no choice left but to watch herself fall.
Neb flipped over the last card.
Ace of spades.
Blackjack.
"Shocked awake in the middle of the day
In a fight over shadows of the night
And you wonder why the talk is so bold
When it's boring and the story's so old"
"It's dead, dead, dead!" Max declared in an early victory. Atop her chair she stood to tower over Cori with dice in paw. "Oh, your display was admirable, I'll give you that. However," she interrupted herself with a cackle, "your pathetic journey ends here." She flaunted with a theatrical shake of the dice before looking down at Cori.
Cori looked back up with their eyes half-closed. "So, like, are you and Eleos into role-play, then?" they mumbled.
Max flomped down to sit properly in her chair. "Maybe," she chuckled. The game in actuality barely captured her attention at all. She'd only insisted on playing it because she thought it'd be really funny, but it wasn't really ideal with just two players.
"Are you going to roll the dice?" Cori asked. They sat forward with their chin resting on their left paw, looking about as bored as Max felt.
"Nah," Max said, dropping the dice back into the box. "This game is boring." She turned to watch Cori's reaction, but they were distracted by something else. Again. The same something. They were staring at her ear with very obvious concern even though she'd already very thoroughly explained she was fine. She stared back at them, hoping they'd notice and knock it off.
Cori kept their eyes trained on it, completely unaware of her stare, for far longer than she'd expected. With every second that ticked by, her self-confidence plummeted. She stopped staring at them to look anywhere else. Her ears and tail fell, finally getting Cori's attention. "Is it really that bad?" she mumbled.
Cori hopped up and said, "No! Sorry!" That didn't comfort Max even slightly. "I wasn't looking, I was just…." They stopped themself when Max turned to glare at them. The look melted them into a puddle. They looked even more dejected than Max. "Sorry."
"It's fine," Max said through grit teeth. This was still her good day. No matter what. She grabbed her coffee cup and chugged the rest of it. For a board game hut, the place brewed decent stuff. Really good, even. This was her third cup, and she was considering a fourth. It was a tough fight between the rush in her head and the jittering in her everywhere else. "This game sucks. What do you want to play?"
Cori jumped a bit and said, "Huh? Oh, uh, I dunno." While they decided that, Max decided to get the game put away. Luckily, they'd barely constructed the trap at all. She carefully folded the game board and tossed it toward the box, followed by the largest pieces. "Max?" Cori asked.
"'Sup?" Max answered as she balled up the multicolored mice and threw them at the game box. She reached over to grab the cage and felt it flex in her grip. Was she gripping it that hard?
A cold paw on her shoulder got her to stop and turn to Cori. "Are you okay?" they asked.
The question didn't really register for her. Regardless, she flippantly said, "Yeah," and went back to throwing all the plastic at the box with increasing fervor. The pieces started bouncing out, which made her throw them faster, which made more pieces bounce out, which made Cori grab her paw and force her to stop.
"Max," Cori said. They grabbed her other paw and turned her to face them. She couldn't hold back anymore. It all tried to come out at once, but she didn't have any words for it yet. She stared into Cori's eyes with dread in her own, and her paper smile finally fell.
Everyone else bought it. Why wasn't Cori?
The ramp of the trap fell from her paws, and she flopped to the ground. "I…," she mumbled, but still couldn't find the words. Her ear had just started to sting again, too. This day probably couldn't have gone any worse, and now, she had tomorrow to worry about. It made her want to take every piece of that stupid board game and snap it in her paws, stab it into the game board, or stomp it into the floor.
Yet, despite her heart racing, she didn't have any energy for it. It thumped into her chest with empty fumes of caffeinated frustration. She wanted to tear the world apart, but more than that, she wanted to sleep.
Cori sat on her right and rubbed at her shoulder, asking, "Rough day?"
"Yep," Max said. Even Cori's light touch made her want to rip her fur out—she could hear the individual strands of fur better than she could feel them, and even slight tugs from Cori's scales resounded like klaxons to the skin beneath. Her own breath, Cori's breath, the air conditioning, her heart beat, Cori's, some distant hoots at a game going how someone wanted it, they all cluttered up her mind and obscured her own thoughts from her.
Max gently slapped Cori's paw off her and said, "This was supposed to be my good day." The light smack miraculously didn't register at all on Cori's expression. Why did it feel like their face was too loud to look at? She wasn't even looking.
"That sucks," Cori said. They started to bring their paw up to hug her, but stopped themselves before she even had to glare at them. "Are you thirsty? Do you want some water?" Max nodded, and they got up without hesitation. "Be right back, all right?" They watched, waiting until Max nodded again to leave. The drop in stimulation relieved her, but she already missed them.
She sat there waiting, couldn't bring herself to move. Only her breath kept her company, and she realized it had turned erratic. That probably didn't help. She started focusing on slowing it down. It didn't help, but it stopped her getting worse.
Cori returned, opening and closing the door as quietly as possible. Max started to worry they were trying to sneak up behind her when they said, "Hey, coming up behind you. It's just me." Could they hear her thoughts? Cori slowly stepped into her peripheral vision and stopped in their tracks when her head jerked over to look at them. They kept their smile on and reiterated, "Just me. I've got your water."
Max started to wonder how feral she looked in the moment. Did they know she could even see them? That she could hear them? Based on the raging inferno in her heart, she could only assume she looked as sapient as a sunflower. They were only doing this because they thought she was a wild animal. After all, wasn't she?
She focused intently on her speech to carefully say, "Thank you," so they didn't have to worry. They brought the water over and sat diagonal to her. When she reached for it, they put the water in her paws. She looked at them to gauge their expression, but it hadn't changed. She must have slipped anyway, despite her best efforts. The water was refreshing, at least.
"Did you wanna talk about it?" Cori asked.
That offer, wait. "You can understand me?" Max asked.
"Yeah," Cori whispered. "You're not slipping, don't worry." Max was still half convinced they were only guessing very well. Even still, they weren't moving in to hug her, prodding her further, telling her it would be okay, nothing. They were just sitting there. Being there.
It was comforting to have them there, but why were they acting like that? They didn't seem scared, either. Why were they just sitting there?
Then again, she really didn't want someone to pester her right now. She needed the silence. She didn't need someone to tell her it was okay when she knew it wasn't. They were just there for her, available, willing to listen, but not demanding that she talk. It let her calm down without having to worry about what she needed to say when. With the rest of the world overwhelming her, it was nice to have one less concern.
"Thank you," Max said. Even still, they didn't break the silence more than her, just smiling and nodding. It gave her warmth she didn't know she needed. Somehow, by simply sitting there, she felt more understood than she had since she woke up in Neb's place.
"It's not going well," she finally admitted. They nodded, waiting for her to continue if she wanted. "Besides… this," she nodded at her bandaged ear, "The date was really fun. But now, I'm just like this." Putting the water down, she pulled her tail around to hug it. The blunt edge dug into her arm and mad her wince. "I wish Eleos had tried to pierce my tail instead."
Cori chuckled a bit, and so did she. "I didn't know that the… feral thing was permanent until yesterday, either," she said. It was a bit embarrassing to admit she hadn't known something that obvious to everyone else, but Cori just nodded with an empathetic wince. "I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about it."
Her awareness had died down enough that she could breathe easy again. "This is just who I am. Forever," she said. "No matter how much 'better' I get, my head's always going to be a little bit fucked." Her words started to feel familiar but familiar from a time before the Dungeons. "I'm just running different software. The best I can do is act like everyone else." She let out a sigh and bashfully looked to the side. "And I can't really act very well."
"Yeah," Cori mumbled with a wince.
Max looked over at them to blink. After staring at them in utter disbelief, she said, "Cori, I really didn't need you to agree with me there."
Cori squinted before their eyes shot open. "W-wait, no!" they shouted as quietly as they could. They threw their paws in front of them to shake them in surrender. "I-I meant I've always felt the same way!" Their paws came back to clap their head.
"Oh," Max mumbled. "That…," she chuckled a bit, "that makes a lot more sense." She smiled at Cori and thought she felt their heart start to beat again.
"Y-yeah, sorry," Cori stammered. They tried so hard to keep up their smile that Max had to hold back a laugh. The attempt was cute. Adorable, even. Somehow, no matter what they did, no matter what they said, it gave her some sort of smile. "A-are you mad?"
Max shook her head and said, "No." That got Cori to audibly sigh in relief. Now that she knew they weren't trying to insult her, though, she only had more questions. An inkling of why tickled her from long absent memories, but she couldn't put a concrete paw on what other than being feral she was describing. Had Cori ever slipped? "Do you… deal with this, too?" Maybe they were a less severe case.
"Oh, uh, no," Cori muttered. Max gave them a confused look, and they reached back to scratch at their neck with an increasingly flustered expression. "It's like, I dunno. I feel a lot like I have to pretend to be like everyone else." They shrunk down into themselves, eyes darting along the ground, and shrugged. "S-sorry, it's probably not the same."
"It's all right," Max said, still curiously watching them. "I kinda think I felt this way before, too." A brewing headache came to warn her not to try too hard to remember. She drank some more water and shrugged. "It's a lot of just saying what I'm supposed to instead of what I want to, y'know?"
"Ugh, yeah," Cori groaned, tempting Max to chuckle. She didn't know if she'd ever talked about this with someone else, but having them agree so openly with her felt beyond freeing. Seeing their relief, too, felt better than feeling it herself. "It's like, with most people I just have to act like whatever I care about doesn't matter, and whatever I don't is as big a deal as everyone says it is."
"Yeah," Max sighed, shaking her head. An ear perked up in curiosity, though. "Most?"
Cori shrunk into themselves again. "W-well, um, so," they mumbled. "With you, um. It's—I don't." Their paws came up to tap claw against opposite claw while they looked anywhere that wasn't at Max.
"Yeah?" Max said with a smile. They were always so cute when they got all nervous like that; and the sight became all the better when she had the solution. She rolled up onto her hindpaws and scampered over to wrap her arms around them. "Me, neither." While Cori splayed their limbs out and froze, Max squeezed them tighter and pressed her cheek into theirs.
Leaning into them made her worries all fade away. When Cori's arms wrapped around her, too, Max felt the world stand still.
"When I spend time with you," Max whispered. "It's like I can be whoever I used to be." No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't resist pressing her cheek harder into them. It was too deeply ingrained, and it felt so right. "I don't think anyone's ever let me calm down like you did just now."
Cori squeezed her without seeming to mind the sparks she couldn't hold back. They squirmed a bit, trying to figure out what to say back, but kept their hold strong. "I'm glad," they muttered.
Max's smile widened. How was Cori still not used to hugs by now? Although, admittedly, even she felt a nice warmth in her chest that caught her off guard every time. It was a deep, deep comfort, though, and she wouldn't give it up for the world. She had a million different ways to tell them how much she appreciated their company but had no trouble finding the perfect words: "I love you."
At that, Cori's squirms stopped all at once. Instead of freezing, they grew that little bit softer, that slight bit more tender. They'd said as much to each other before, anyway, so this time was no different. Max could feel their smile along her cheek.
"I love you, too," Cori said, more tender than ever before.
All their nerves had left, and Max felt her own do the same. Like a ground, any sheepishness or uncertainty zigged and zagged into the ground leaving complete certainty in its wake. Their bodies moved on their own, giving each other one last tight squeeze before pulling slightly away without letting go. Max stared into their eyes, and they stared back. For the first time, the eye contact didn't bother her.
When Max closed her eyes and leaned forward, all the synchrony vanished. Only Cori's paws firmly holding her back remained in its wake. Her eyes shot open when she realized what she was doing.
Max jumped back, throwing her paws over her mouth. "I-I'm so—I don't—didn't—sorry!" she stammered behind her paws. What was she doing?! Her mind ran as fast as the lightning coursing through her and bouncing out of her cheeks in humiliation. "I-I don't know what got into me, I'm so sorry."
"No, it's, y'know," Cori mumbled, then forced a chuckle. "It happens, right?" They shrugged and placed both paws awkwardly on their hips. "I-I only started because, um."
Started? Max looked over to see their eyes looking far beneath the floor they were trained on. Did they initiate, or did she? While that question ran in her mind, Cori glanced up at her and nearly melted with fluster when they looked away. Max felt her heart stop. What she wanted that glance to mean terrified her.
No, no, Max subtly shook her head to get it on straight. This was fine. She was going to make it fine. Searching the room in an instant, she shot over to a box of wooden blocks and back in less than a second. She popped the top off and turned the box upside down onto the table, taking it off to reveal a tall tower of groups of three wooden blocks per layer.
"Ever played this before? Love this game," she said. "Here, you just gotta take a block from the bottom," she poked a middle block out and tugged it out the other side, "and put it on top." With the block placed, she looked expectantly over to Cori.
Nothing had happened.
"Oh, uh, sure!" Cori said. They walked over like nothing happened, and they both went on to play Jenga like nothing happened because, of course, nothing had happened.
Perhaps Max was biased, but it was a lot more fun than mouse trap.
"Panicked call to her best friend on the phone
Won't sit down but she just can't sit alone
Hard to justify a party band
To somebody with no party plans"
Max?
Hey, Max? Are you there?
Can you hear me?
…
Okay, you can, good. Sorry, just trying to make this quick.
The, uh. The letter. I got the letter to your partner.
He…
It meant a lot to him. He really appreciated you reaching out. Even if…
Even if it's too late, he's glad to hear from you again. He's still working through it, but he's glad you're doing okay, at least.
Although, y'know, if you'd just taken the break he'd suggested, maybe it wouldn't have come to this.
Or, uh, his words, not mine.
There was something else he wanted to tell you.
It's hard to summarize, so I'll just try to quote him. Give me a second to… remember.
Are you still there?
…
Okay, good. I'll start.
Again, just quoting him, so keep that in mind.
All right, here goes.
"Look, everyone knew something was wrong. Everyone could tell, and we were all worried. I know you didn't think you could get along with anyone else, but everyone cared. Even the ones you left on really bad terms. Like Goon… right, memory. Well, if you can remember Goon, y'all could barely stay in the same room together. After you left, though, honestly, I think he was worried more than I was.
"He'd tell me it wasn't my fault like everyone else did, but with him… it felt like he said it wasn't my fault because it was his. I'm not sure, though, you know how Goon—or, right.
"Sorry. Maybe you don't.
"But they remember you. I know that they'll understand. Just give them time. Maybe not at first, but….
"Show them what you used to show me. That side of you that cared. I know being a hard ass feels safer, but it's not you. All that machismo, come on. It'd be cute if it wasn't so obnoxious. You don't need to prove how much of a big strong dude you are to be a friend to someone. I actually preferred it a lot more when you were just… I don't know how to put it other than when you were you.
"Everyone can see through it. I promise it doesn't work. And look, again, I know it's scary, but please. I know you can do it. We saved the world, didn't we? You've got some kind of courage in there. Have to.
"You opened up to me. You can do the same for them. They'll appreciate it.
"Just please, don't give up.
"Not again.
"Thanks for reaching out.
"Goodbye."