"You're so grumpy, Roy."

"I am not grumpy, Maes."

Maes huffed from somewhere in the room. Roy kept his head down, focused on the paperwork in front of him. Just because Maes liked interrupting his work day since he got transferred to Central didn't mean Roy would allow himself to be distracted. Riza would be so proud.

"You're literally always grumpy, Roy. Ed just came in and you didn't even say hello!"

Roy took a deep breath, signing a document and dropping it on the pile on his left. "I greeted Fullmetal good morning, anything more was just unnecessary."

"You looked like you swallowed a lemon!" Maes paused, causing Roy to glance up at him. He had his hand on his stubbled chin. "Actually, you didn't look like anything, but the lemon-swallowing essence was there."

Roy chuckled. Damn him.

He felt more than saw Maes stop right in front of his desk. "I know just what will cure your grumpiness, my bestest friend!"

Before Roy could even blink, a picture of Elysia was shoved in front of his face. He abandoned his pen, leaning back in his chair. "Dear God, Maes."

"Isn't she cute?"

"Adorable."

Maes's face contorted into something Roy had never experienced, but knew from association with this man that it was his Proud Dad face. "And look at my wife!" He whipped out another picture, this time of Gracia in a sundress. "Isn't she beautiful!?"

"Stunning."

"Hey!" Maes exclaimed. "Watch it." He winked.

Roy stared. "Seriously?"

Maes laughed, tucking the pictures back into his uniform. Where did he even find enough pockets for everything? "I'm only joking. I know you're not interested anyway, don't worry." Another wink.

Roy rolled his eyes, picking his pen back up with a sigh. "Yes, Maes, I'm not interested in your wife, I can assure you."

Maes was silent, and Roy didn't need to look at him to know he was eyeballing him in his distinct Maes way. He was already uncomfortable because of it, so he decided the best strategy to get his friend out of here faster would be to get him talking until he dropped.

"You haven't forced me on a date in a while," Roy casually mentioned to get him going. He was only slightly curious why.

Maes usually loved setting him up for blind dates with random women. Roy didn't personally enjoy it all that much, but he couldn't deny that it made his life easier; if Maes was finding women he thought Roy would like, Roy wouldn't have to do it himself. He'd approached each date with cautious hopefulness at first, but after a while he'd come to the realisation that he could never truly fall in love with a civilian. And, honestly, they probably wouldn't be able to fall in love with him either. There was a weird dangerous appeal to him—Hero of Ishval and all—but that was all.

More recently, after what was probably close to the twentieth disastrous date Maes had set him up on, Roy had come to doubt how well his friend actually knew him. Because Roy had felt nothing for any of these women, but surely Maes knew him better than that, right?

"I've given up, Roy!" Maes exclaimed, plopping down on the couch.

Probably for the best, really.

"I wish you would've liked Mindy…" He sighed. "She's Gracia's best friend and it would've been sooo cute if we could have best friend double dates."

Roy didn't bother responding to that.

"Are you still letting Havoc believe you sleep with a different woman every night?"

Now that got a smile out of him. "I need some sort of entertainment in this job."

Maes snorted loudly. "You are unbelievable."

Roy chuckled, looking up at his friend. Maes was frowning at him with that look of his—that exasperated, older brother look Roy was used to receiving. It made him smile, weirdly. Because it was in little moments like these that it felt like Maes truly did consider him family.

Maes's expression changed, becoming softer, almost understanding. "You'll find someone, don't worry."

Now Roy snorted. Maes was using that sappy soft voice, as though to reassure Roy, as though this actually upset him. "I'll be just fine, Maes."

Maes's expression took on a more serious edge that had Roy pausing. "Just promise me you'll keep an open mind, okay?"

Roy raised an eyebrow. "What a lovely way to tell me to settle."

"I'm not telling you to settle! I just think that sometimes the right person comes in the way you least expect."

Roy rolled his eyes. Maes got that way sometimes. This was by no means the first time he was hearing this. Maes was too romantic, but Roy couldn't blame him. He'd probably had the best experience with women Roy had ever known; meeting Gracia, who was undeniably his soulmate, made him feel like everyone could have what he did. But Roy didn't think that was the case. Not for him anyway.

"I'll keep it in mind."

Roy stared at the train schedule, his mind distracted. Ed had hurried over to buy them tickets, so Roy just waited, hands in his uniform pockets.

Ed had suggested the 10:04 train, and Roy had absently agreed but, looking at the schedule now, he regretted his lack of research. Because this train's route was different than the last time they'd gone to Resembool. It was different than the one he'd booked all those years ago with Hawkeye the day he'd met Ed.

This train stopped at Ishval.

And Roy was a coward, and therefore tempted to wait for the next one. But what was stronger than his cowardice was his pride, so he was not about to make Ed aware that he was too apprehensive to even pass by Ishval on a train.

"Got 'em!" Ed said, strolling back over to Roy. "Train leaves in five and the guy said we can get on now."

Roy nodded, absently reaching down to grip the handles of his small suitcase. He hadn't packed much, considering they would probably only stay a night, but he didn't have anything smaller than this suitcase.

If Ed felt his apprehension as they boarded the train, he didn't let on. He was probably assuming he was nervous about what was about to happen today. About the transmutation, about the soul bond, about their relationship.

All those things were indeed contributing to his apprehension, but now passing by Ishval was a more immediate worry.

Ed plopped down on the bench opposite Roy, stretching and yawning. He gave Roy a small curious look, but didn't verbalise his thoughts. Roy wondered what he was thinking, and why it felt like they were both dancing around some very important conversations.

Last night had felt bizarre, in a sense that nothing had changed, and yet everything had changed. He and Ed ate Xingese takeout at the kitchen table, Roy had called Hawkeye to let her know he wouldn't be coming to work in the morning, and then they retreated to bed, where they cuddled like usual. Roy had dreamt—and dreaming of Maes always made him broody the next day.

They didn't speak about the dream, or about the soul bond, or about the fact that very soon they would once again be two separate beings. And they didn't speak about what that would mean.

The train was not as full as it would've been a couple hours ago; they'd missed the rush hour. But Roy still eyed the few people around them. He caught himself looking, evaluating his surroundings for potential threats, and stopped.

He looked out the window instead, until he started recognising the terrain, until his hands started sweating. Ishval was the next stop.

He averted his gaze early, making sure he didn't catch a glimpse of the town he'd so thoroughly destroyed and was now rebuilding. He stared at the seat next to Ed as though it was the most interesting thing in the world.

Ed noticed. Of course he did, because he always seemed to notice the things Roy really didn't want him to while remaining utterly oblivious to everything else.

"It's looking good," Ed remarked as the train slowed to a stop at the station. "Don't you wanna see?"

Roy swallowed, trying to calm his irrationally racing heart. He shook his head, but a few seconds after the train pulled away he stole a glance anyway. Because he was too curious for his own good.

Buildings. Construction. No scorch marks.

Then his eyes went back to the wooden seat by Ed. That single glance had taken his breath away. Perhaps they should've waited for the next train after all. He really didn't want to start hyperventilating in public. It was bad enough it had already happened in front of Ed.

"You're in charge of it all now, right?"

Roy nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

"I'm surprised you've not been told to come on site." He looked at Ed. He was leaning back in his seat with his arms crossed over his chest. He seemed casual enough about this, and the bond didn't betray any sort of apprehension. It appeared he was simply making conversation, but Roy couldn't stop the feeling that he was sussing him out.

"I have," Roy said. Then, with a bit of shame, admitted, "I declined."

Ed shifted in his seat, crossing an ankle over his knee. "It would either make the nightmares worse or better."

"Better?" Roy could not fathom that happening.

Ed shrugged, finally looking away from the window and looking at Roy. "Changing the memories, updating them. It's better to remember the place as a built up town than a rubble. It could give you some sort of closure, maybe."

Roy didn't think that would be his body's reaction if he stepped foot in Ishval again. "It would be too dangerous for me to go regardless."

Ed raised a brow. "Why?"

Roy gazed at him, noticing the genuine curiosity and confusion. "People want to kill me, Ed." Ed froze, and a strong wave of unease and protectiveness flowed through the bond. It warmed his heart, just a bit. "I am generally hated, still, by a lot of people. And I can definitely see why."

Ed was silent, his eyes having lost their focus as he retreated into his thoughts. Then, he sighed, looking back out the window. "I don't see it," he mumbled, "I don't see the monster you see."

Roy didn't know what to say to that.

They walked to the Rockbell house in silence, but unspoken words hung around them. It appeared that Alphonse had been watching for them out the window, because the moment the Rockbell house became visible, the door opened and Alphonse jumped up and down, waving at them.

Ed laughed next to him, lifting an arm and waving back.

"Brother!" Al called out as they approached. In a flash he'd accosted Ed in a hug, almost knocking him backwards. "It was like you said!" He let go of Ed, still grinning widely. "You basically already had the reversal array, all you needed was some alkahestry additions! We did it, Brother!"

Ed laughed, easing Alphonse off him. "Easy, Al! We get it, you're a genius."

Al scoffed. "Me? You did most of the work! If only you'd known more about alkahestry beforehand you would've solved it way quicker!"

Ed rolled his eyes, but then paused and sniffed the air. "What's this I smell?"

Al grinned. "Winry's making stew since you were coming."

"Fuck yeah."

Al turned to Roy, the wide smile still stuck on his face. "Has Brother explained how the array works, sir?"

Actually, he and Ed hadn't spoken about the soul bond at all. "Ah, not yet."

Al gestured towards the house. "Well, let's sit at the table and I'll explain everything. It's actually so cool!"

Once they stepped inside, Winry popped her head in from the kitchen, her eyes narrowed on Ed. "How's your automail?"

Ed rolled his eyes. "I was literally here a few weeks ago, gear-head."

Winry sent him a scathing glare. "Oh, forgive me for not trusting you to take care of my baby! I'll have you in for some maintenance later."

"Fine, fine," Ed muttered, plopping down in a chair. Roy followed suit, claiming the chair next to him. Ed looked around as though looking for something. "Where's Granny?"

"Shop," Al said as he sat down in a chair opposite Roy. He looked at them both, grinning. "So, this is how it's going to work: The soul energies can be split without the activator of the array giving anything, so I'll draw and active the array—"

"Wait a fucking second, you're not activating shit!" Ed glared, almost bouncing off his seat with how fast he sat up straight.

Al paused, narrowing his eyes. "What do you mean? Who else are you expecting to activate the array?"

Ed scowled. "I don't give a shit, you're not going anyway near that crazy lady's work. What if it rebounds, huh?!"

Al looked to Roy. "Please, sir, tell him."

How flattering, that Al thought he had any sway over Ed's opinion whatsoever.

Ed gave him a scathing look, as though simply daring him to agree with Alphonse. But Roy wasn't doing this Elric business again.

He cleared his throat. "I would prefer if you worked this issue out amongst yourselves."

Ed smirked smugly at Al as though what Roy had said meant he'd taken Ed's side. In fact, he secretly agreed with Al.

Al scoffed. "Face it, Brother, I'm the only one who knows a decent amount of both alchemy and alkahestry. I know how the array works, and I know how the reversal array works. I'm activating the array. End of discussion."

The look Ed gave him would've had lesser men running for their lives. But this was Alphonse, so he merely stared back, completely unimpressed.

It was Al that won the staring contest. Ed sighed deeply, and rubbed at his eyes. "Fuck, Al, if something goes wrong—"

"It won't, Brother! Do you really think I would've called you here if I wasn't positive the array would hurt no one?"

Ed bit the inside of his cheek, gazing down at the table. He looked troubled, and Roy had the sudden urge to reach out and thread their fingers together. He clasped his hands in his lap in order to restrain himself.

"Are you sure the activator of the array won't have to give anything?"

Al's face softened, his eyes becoming fond as he looked at his brother. "Yes, Brother. In fact, it's the people in the middle of the array that will pay a price. If your souls had already merged, the energy to separate them would be a lot greater, and we would've been having a completely different conversation. But they're simply touching, so the price to pry them apart won't be too bad. You'll most likely just feel a bit under the weather for a few days, a bit depleted maybe."

Ed sighed, then looked at Roy.

Roy blinked. "What?"

"You okay with being tired for a few days?"

Roy kept his face perfectly blank as he said, "I'm always tired anyway."

Ed snorted. "Fucking waste of space."

"Brother!"

"Absolutely useless."

Roy rolled his eyes.

Al looked at him, wincing. "Sorry, sir."

Roy waved his hand. "I'm more than used to your brother, Alphonse."

"Al, get him some coffee, his brain's on the verge of death."

"Here, sir," Al said, handing him a steaming cup of hot coffee. "I'm really sorry but I forgot and put milk in it, is that okay?"

"Thank you, Alphonse," Roy said, taking the mug off him. "I'll drink anything with caffeine in it, don't you worry."

Al chuckled, sighing in contentment as he closed his eyes against the sun's rays. Roy was sitting on a porch step, Al standing next to him and Ed lying on the grass below, hands under his head. Pieces of paper surrounded him, all of the reversal array they were about to draw onto the floor.

Al walked closer to Ed, who was petulantly scowling at the sky. He hadn't been happy Alphonse would be the one to activate the array, so he insisted he studied the reversal array one more time, just to make sure.

"Brother," Al said, nudging him with a foot. "Spar with me."

Ed gave him a look. "You're still not strong enough yet, Al. What if I hurt you?"

Al smiled that evil smile. "Who says it'll be you that hurts me?"

"Oh, you little shit—" Ed sat up, twisting to glare at Al. Abruptly he froze. "I know what you're doing."

Al raised a brow. "What am I doing?"

"You're trying to challenge me."

"Am I?"

Ed stood, leaning closer to Al and pointing a finger against his chest. "Alphonse Elric, I am your older brother and—"

Al rolled his eyes and grabbed Ed's wrist, dragging him away. "Come on, I'm going insane cooped up in the house."

Ed bristled. "That's good, you—"

"You've never won a sparring match against me anyway, I'm not about to start losing now."

"You little—"

Roy sipped his coffee, enjoying the sun as it warmed his skin. Ed pulled his top over his head in one smooth motion, abandoning it somewhere on the grass, and Roy stared, utterly unashamed, at the expanse of golden skin.

They started off light, warming up. It was obvious to Roy that Ed was holding back. He was probably used to sparring with a suit of armour that felt no pain, so it was no surprise he would go easy on Al now that he was flesh and blood. But Al seemed to be having none of it.

Soon Ed's chest glistened with sweat in the sun. Roy admired the way his muscles contracted with every move, the way Ed's perfect, lithe body moved so damn elegantly—how was it fair that Ed couldn't utter a word of elegance and yet his body was the epitome of it?

As he set his empty mug on the porch step next to him, he wondered how long it would take Ed to knock him on his ass in a sparring match. Seconds, probably. He hadn't kept it up, really, after the military academy. He perhaps relied too heavily on fire and guns.

Al laughed as Ed gawked at what was probably a strong punch, and Roy's mind took to comparing the Elric brothers. He hadn't really had a chance to do so before now. For the majority of the time he'd known Alphonse, he hadn't really known what he looked like.

Al's eyes were green gold, his hair more yellow than gold, his skin milkier, paler.

Ed was…the sun. Golden hour personified. From his hair to his eyes to his skin, he shone under the sun as though it were his slave, as though it worshipped him. His knowledge on the lost civilisation of Xerxes was limited, but if they'd truly all looked like Ed…

No, even then, Ed was a unique beauty, he was sure of it.

It occurred to him, then, that Alphonse looked more like their mother, with his sweeter, rounder face, his kind smile. He had more typical Amestrian features. Ed looked more like…his father. Perhaps Roy should never mention that to him if he cherished his life.

Ed and Al laughed loudly as they rolled on the grass, until they both lay next to each other, arms outstretched and panting.

"What are those idiots doing?"

Roy glanced behind him, where Winry had leaned against the door frame.

Roy smiled. "Being brothers, I suppose."

Winry sighed, shaking her head. Then, she cupped her mouth, and in a much louder voice, she announced, "Food's ready!"

Ed and Al cheered.

Roy leaned against the wall, arms crossed across his chest. He absently stared at the floor, listening to the muffled voices of Ed and Winry inside the room.

After lunch, Winry had all but dragged Ed into her workshop to look at his automail, while Al had retreated to the study to begin sketching out the reversal array. With every passing moment that Roy was left with his thoughts, the anxiety mounted.

He sighed, absently looking to the wall next to him. There were pictures hung on a board, and he found his interest piqued enough to move closer.

Most of them were of Ed, Al and Winry as kids. There was one in the snow, the three of them playing. It didn't often snow around here, which meant that this would've been…

He tugged at the picture, turning it. And there it was, the date. Roy had been in Ishval that day, marvelling at the fact that it was snowing in such a typically warm part of the country. Just that morning, he'd been told to go ahead and end the war.

He put the picture back, looking at the one next to it; Winry and her parents. He stared at the two faces he'd very briefly known, and his heart ached for a second. His eyes moved over the next one, of Ed and Al and the woman who was so obviously Trisha Elric. Yes, Alphonse looked a lot like her indeed.

There were a few others, more recent ones. His eyes focused on one in particular, as though drawn to it. Of Ed, in a white shirt and brown slacks, grinning widely at the camera as he held his suitcase over his shoulder, his brown coat flowing behind him. A train could be seen in the distance.

That was how he'd looked the day he came back to Central after his extended leave. Was it that day? Had Ed really been that happy to come back? To see Roy, maybe? If he dared even dream that.

He took a breath and leaned against the wall again.

His mind went back to this morning, or rather last night. At the dream he'd had. He hadn't really had time to think about it; he remembered that interaction as clear as day, but right now he looked at it in a new light.

Had Maes known? He used to set Roy up on dates all the time, but after that conversation, he never did again. In fact, it had only been a few months after that that he'd been killed.

Had Maes, somehow, figured out that Roy maybe wasn't interested in any of the women he'd set him up with because he simply wasn't…into women?

Even thinking about it was making him want to heave a long sigh. It would've been so much easier if he'd liked both men and women. He could've just ignored the men part, acted like it didn't exist. But…

He thought of Ed, and how Roy felt around him, how they were with each other. Roy had never felt or acted like that with a woman, or with other men even. Being with Ed was…unique, in every way possible. He felt comfortable to be himself, he felt understood in ways that made his soul sing. He felt safe, with Ed.

And the sex…It was vulnerable.

There was nothing necessarily romantic about Ed. He was rough around the edges, feral in ways that shouldn't be exciting, claiming Roy and taking—taking all that he wanted, unapologetically. A demanding lover, for certain. Intimidating, even, in ways. But underneath that hard exterior lay the purest, kindest heart Roy had even known. And Roy wouldn't have it any other way.

He didn't feel any sort of pressure to perform with Ed. It was just him and Ed, sharing a very intimate moment together, as equals.

Maes wouldn't have known about Ed specifically, since Roy's interest in him had started a few years after Maes had died, but still—maybe Maes had truly known him better than Roy had ever imagined. Maybe Maes had known him better than Roy had known himself.

What would he say now, seeing him with Ed? Would he be happy for him, or would he disapprove? Back when he was alive he'd thought of Ed and Al almost as his sons, but it was impossible to known how he would've regarded them as adults.

Just promise me you'll keep an open mind, okay?

Dammit, Maes.

Something soft brushed against his leg, and he looked down. The Rockbells' dog was looking up at him, tongue out and tail wagging.

Roy sighed, crouching down and petting its furry head, his mind still elsewhere.

The door opened next to him, and Ed walked out.

"That was quick," Roy remarked, standing back up. He hadn't felt the pain of automail reconnection this time.

Ed shrugged. "It was only some oiling and cleaning. She does it whenever she can cause she knows I don't do it."

Roy frowned. "How often are you meant to do it?"

"Like once a week?" Ed waved a hand. "I rarely do it and my automail's always been fine."

"Always been fine?" Winry said from the threshold, glaring at him. "That's because you had a new damn automail every week!"

"Exaggeration," Ed muttered.

Winry lifted her wrench up in warning and Ed winced away from her.

"I'll make sure he does it, Miss Rockbell," Roy said, giving Ed a disapproving glance. But just as the words were out his mouth he paused, wondering if he would actually be able to. Ed would…move out soon enough, right? So Roy would have no immediate access to him like he did now.

Ed rolled his eyes. He grabbed Roy's elbow and dragged him away. "Yeah, yeah, let's go. Where's Al?"

"Study," Roy said. "He's sketching the array."

Ed turned to look at Winry, raising a brow. "You coming to watch?"

Winry huffed. "No chance. I know to come in if I hear screaming." And then she was back in her workshop, the door slamming behind her.

Ed shrugged, dragging Roy the rest of the way to the study.

Al was on his knees, chalk in his hand as he sketched. The array was big enough for both him and Ed to stand in it, with enough space around them for Alphonse to comfortably activate it. The final drawing of the reversal array was on the floor next to him, and he kept glancing at it as he drew.

He looked up as he and Ed entered. "Almost done!"

Ed took a deep breath, glancing at Roy almost imperceptibly. A way of anxiety flowed through the bond. "Let's get this shit over with."

A few seconds later and Alphonse rose, looking down at the array like a proud dad. "Well, this is it. You two stand in the middle."

Roy swallowed, focusing on his breathing as he entered the array. Ed was next to him the entire time, until they paused in the middle, facing each other. Roy stared into Ed's golden eyes, seeing the apprehension as clear as day.

This was it.

"So," Al started. Roy kept his eyes on Ed's face, taking in every little twitch, every nervous swallow. "This will involve a bit of pain. I'm just rearranging the energy. Your souls will be a bit…bruised, and you will most likely feel a bit tired for a few days after, but your souls will go back to the way they were before, okay?" He regarded them for a moment, then said, "Hold hands for me and don't let go, I need you physically connected in some way."

Roy's heart was pounding in his chest as his cold hands grasped Ed's warm ones. Ed held on tightly, as though afraid to let him go.

There was a sense of wrongness inside him, something deep within screaming at him not to do this, begging him not to do this. It felt like there was something unresolved, some unfinished business. It was alarming, but he brushed it off as best he could. It was only natural for him to want to chicken out. He didn't have anywhere near the knowledge about this as the Elrics did. It was normal for him to be more apprehensive, as he had to force himself to be at the complete mercy of Ed and Al.

"You're sure about this?" he mumbled to Ed anyway, squeezing his hands.

"It'll be okay," Ed whispered back, but Roy could've sworn there was an undercurrent of reluctance. As though there was a part of him that didn't want this either.

But it was what they had to do. They couldn't exactly turn around and announce they preferred being soul bonded. Not that they preferred it, exactly…

Al got down on his knees, hands hovering over the array. "Ready?"

"Just do it, Al," Ed said, but his eyes never left Roy's.

In a second, Al's hands pressed over the array, and blue light flared around them.